See Dad Run (2012) s03e05 Episode Script

I can't wait for you guys to meet him.
So Marcus' nephew is really funny, huh? So funny.
Nobody makes me laugh harder than Robbie.
Ever since we were five, he has made various liquids shoot out of my nose.
I shot corn once.
Cream or the whole cob? Robbie is awesome.
He's like the brother I never had.
Um Hello? She meant the cool brother she never had.
Oh.
Okay.
Want to know what I call him? Rob-bay par-tay! Because when Robbie's here, life is just one big party.
He's here, he's here! Aww.
All right, Marcus and Robbie whatever-you-call-him, they're right behind me.
It's rob-bay par-tay! Try it.
Yeah, not gonna do it.
Listen, I like this kid Robbie, you know.
And I think he's a good boy, but whenever you guys get together, Emily, it's like a It's like a perfect storm of bad ideas.
Yay! I love this.
Why? Because it's Sunday.
Aah, whoa, whoa, aah, aah! Don't put that Aah! On top.
- Yeah! - All right! Let's do this! No, don't you Do it.
Who knew? You're such a rule breaker, Emily.
Robbie calls me cray cray Emi-lay.
I get crazy when he's here.
Oh! Aww.
Settle down, ladies.
He's on his way in.
All right, now, we're gonna stick to the plan, right? We're not gonna take our eyes off those two until he's gone.
I don't think we have to worry about them causing any trouble today.
- Why not? - The boy got dumped.
Robbie, it's so good to see you! Yeah, you too, em.
Hey, Mr.
H.
Your your hair looks great.
Thank you, Robbie.
He seems fine to me.
Robbie, these are my girlfriends.
Your girlfriends.
Olivia and Bea.
Hi, uh, Olivia and Bea! Um You're right! Robbie is hilarious.
Here comes the corn! See, his girl cut him loose at the airport.
I guess the white zone is for loading and unloading.
Robbie, is is everything okay? Yeah, everything's fine.
Except my heart hurts.
Robbie.
You are seriously cracking me up.
He was so distraught when I picked him up, I stopped and got him a milk shake.
- Unbelievable.
- I know.
Kids break up all the time.
No, you didn't think to call to see if I wanted anything, Marcus? Come on, man, I-I love milk shakes.
No, you're right.
You're right.
My nephew's pain should've made me think of you.
It's gonna be okay, Robbie.
You know what the good thing coming out of this is maybe they'll both stay out of trouble.
Robbie! Ooh-hoo! Oh, you've gotten so tall, huh? I bet the girls can't keep their hands off of you.
One can.
Robbie, I have the perfect way to cheer you up.
You'll come with us to a party tomorrow night.
Okay, yeah, that that could be fun.
It's at my friend Ashley's house.
My girlfriend's name was Ashley! What are the odds? What's the odds on that? Come here, boy.
Poor guy.
Speaking of the party, Em, have your parents changed their mind about letting you drive at night? No, but I'm waiting for the perf No.
- Dad, I haven't even - No.
Dad, you can't keep saying no.
I could sing it.
And take it home, girls! I think it's time for us to b-i-n-g-go.
Hey! Boop.
Okay, I don't understand.
You let me drive during the day.
Why wouldn't you let me drive at night? It's the same thing.
No, it's as different as night and day, Emily, because it's literally night and day.
Great, I already told everyone I was driving.
Well, I'm sorry, honey.
You're gonna have to learn that, you know, life is full of disappointments.
You know, I didn't get a milk shake, and I had to let that go.
Reason number 29 you should let me drive at night.
I'm home alone with Joe and Janie, the power goes out, and there's a zombie apocalypse.
- Let her drive! - Please let her drive! All right.
Okay, enough.
Enough, okay? I get it.
Tell you what.
We were gonna order a pizza, so You take the car, and you pick up the pizza, okay? Wow, I gotta get me some of those note cards.
Not if I get 'em first.
Okay, now this is just a test.
I want you to go straight there and come right back home.
- Got it.
- Okay? And no sudden turns.
Dad, relax.
My driving record is perfect.
No, no, honey, you'll shift the cheese.
- You'll ruin the pie.
- Yeah.
- I'm on it.
- Okay.
- Love you guys.
- All right.
- Love you too.
- All right, be safe.
So, uh, huh.
Why the sudden change? Because she's not alone.
I have a secret safety net.
Oh, hey, guys.
How is your evening going? What's up, Joe? Great.
As you know, I have recently moved from the boys' to young men's section in jeans.
I feel if the gap recognizes my man hood, so should you.
For this reason, I feel I should be allowed to babysit Janie when you're out on Friday night.
Pause for reaction.
And reply with "No.
" - But, dad - No.
- You didn't even - Joey had a little lamb.
His fleece was white as no.
What? Oh, David, come on.
He deserves a chance.
Thanks, mom.
- Really? - Mm-hmm.
You think he's up to this? Oh, of course not.
But we have a little fly on the wall called Kevin.
Mm-hmm.
The boy will never know.
Just like Emily.
Only my dad listens to his own cd.
I don't believe this.
Oh, look, a speed bump.
Yah! Ow! Hmm.
This is crazy.
It's been 19 minutes.
How long does it take to pick up a pizza? All right, what are your list of demands? Hello, parents.
How are you? Sweetie, honey, now's not the time.
Glad to hear it.
I think you are making a huge mistake putting my life in Joe's chocolate-and cheeto-stained hands.
Honey, sweetie, everything's gonna be okay.
I can't believe this house.
- Here's your pizza.
- Ah, yes! No cheese was shifted in transit - Perfect.
- But your little spy was.
I don't know what you're getting at, Emily.
I can't believe you hid Kevin in the back of the car.
I'm sorry, David.
She was playing your song.
You know how we always like to harmonize when we're driving together? Oh, that's good at the end.
I like that a lot.
Guys from "Wrong Direction.
" Can we get back to me? I passed your little test, dad.
Now can I drive to the party? Oh.
Honey, you thought the test was for you? No, that test was for me.
See, I wanted to see if I'd still be nervous with you driving, even with Kevin in the car, and I failed.
- So uncool.
- What? Come on, Emily.
What's the big deal? You can still go to the party.
I'll drop you off and pick you up.
Oh, maybe you want to walk me in and introduce yourself to everybody? You know what, that would be an unexpected treat for her friends.
Just forget it.
I don't want to go to the party anymore.
Robbie doesn't want to go.
You won't let me drive.
The night's ruined.
Wha hey, hey! What did that pizza ever do to you? Okay, you guys, we're leaving.
Mom, Janie's already giving me attitude.
Make her say it again.
Janie.
- Joe's in charge.
- Mm-hmm.
Kevin's out of the house for a couple hours, so you got the place all to yourselves, all right, guys? Okay, love you both.
Do you? Emily, you sure you want to miss the party? I'm not in the mood.
I'm going to Taylor's to watch a movie.
Whoa, whoa.
- Is everybody ready? - Uh, yeah.
Alicia's gonna meet us at the movie.
Robbie here agreed to join us.
- Oh, good.
- Yeah.
I love movies.
My first date with Ashley was a movie.
Go have a seat.
Go sit down.
Sit down.
Oh, boy.
David, this kid is killing me.
I say we leave him with Emily.
Everything I say reminds him of Ashley.
Watch him work.
Watch, watch.
Are you okay, buddy? Ashley used to call me buddy.
"Hey, buddy.
" "You're so cute, buddy.
" "Never call me again, buddy!" Wow.
Wow.
Okay, all right, listen, you kids have fun.
You know what? Let's just stay here and watch a movie.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on.
You two are not staying here.
This is my house, my time.
So I'm going back into the kitchen to make sure Janie finishes her vegetables and mine, and when I come back, I better not see your pathetic butts on my couch.
So get moving.
My brother's right.
We are pathetic.
So pathetic that your dad and my uncle actually left us alone, and we're doing nothing.
What happened to us, Robbie? The human sundaes, the furniture stackers, the stair sledders.
Two dreamers who actually thought they could fly by using garbage bags as parachutes.
Of course, we were wrong, but at least we had the gumption.
Did you just say gumption? Yes.
My mother said it's a popular S.
A.
T.
word.
You see? That's probably why Ashley dumped me, 'cause all I ever did was study.
All right, that's it.
We are better than this, Robbie.
It's time for these two dreamers to dream again.
Yeah, about something stupid.
Yes! And execute it poorly! You know what? We are going to that party.
Wait, that doesn't sound stupid.
It is if we take my mom's car that I'm not allowed to drive at night.
Now, that sounds stupid.
Yep.
We'll be a couple of idiots.
Let's do it.
We'll be back before my parents get home, right? Pfft, of course.
We're not that stupid.
All right, let's go.
Go! Before Amy and Alicia change their minds.
About what? "Kill, bleed, and die" was sold out, but I got us out of seeing "Wedding in Vienna".
You know what's worse than watching a chick flick? Reading a chick flick.
You know, man, I think we should just head home, because I feel kind of guilty about bailing out on Robbie.
He's such a good kid.
Yeah, I know, and Emily's a good kid too.
I feel bad that she's gonna miss that party.
Look out! I'm going into "Party-ac" arrest! I need some C.
P.
R.
-tay! I'll save you! Clear! Woop, woop, woop, woop! Woop, woop, woop, woop, woop, woop, woop, woop, woop, woop! You know what I'm thinking? Milk shakes.
Let it go, David.
For Emily and Robbie, to cheer 'em up.
Although you know what would've cheered me up? You're killing me.
You're killing me, man.
Here, why don't you text them? See what it feels like to do something for somebody besides yourself.
Everybody say hey! Hey! Everybody say ho! Ho! Whoa.
Gotta go, Robbie! Go, Robbie! Go, Robbie! Go, Robbie! No, we really gotta go.
Go, Robbie! Go, Robbie! My dad's heading home.
We've gotta get my mom's car back.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh! Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh! Seriously? Sorry, Janie.
Your hour of TV is over.
Feel free to, uh, read, clean up your room, or have a moment of quiet reflection.
I'm just gonna get some milk and go to bed.
The sooner I go to sleep, the sooner this nightmare is over.
Janie, what's the matter? There's someone outside! Janie, you're not gonna scare me.
I have everything under control.
You don't.
You really don't! Whoa.
What the heck was that? I Did I blow a tire? Hold on.
His car's not back yet.
I can't believe we actually beat them.
It was just the right amount of stupid to pull that off.
Hi, daddy.
Are you almost home? Oh, really? You need the spare tire you took out when you didn't trust me and had Kevin in the car? Huh.
Are you done? Thank you.
Okay, listen, we are on, um, uh, Mulholland, just west of Coldwater, okay? All right, hon.
All right, bye.
Mmm.
Mmm! Mm, hmm, hmm! Aah! Aah! Brain freeze! Aah! See, that's what you call milk shake karma.
Cheers.
Really? I thought you went to bed.
I can't sleep with a prowler out there.
For the last time, I'm not gonna fall for your games.
I told you! Call mom and dad! No way.
I've got to show them that I can handle this.
Hello, 911? Yes, this is Joe Hobbs.
To whom am I speaking? Hello, Nancy.
How are you? You've got to be kidding me.
It doesn't hurt to be polite.
Okay, remember, stick with the plan.
We were never at that party.
Remember, stick to the plan.
We were never at the milk shake place.
Thanks for getting here so fast.
And safely, I might add.
Okay, you're a good driver, Emily, and and you're a responsible young adult.
I'm sorry I didn't trust you.
- Apology accepted.
- Good.
You guys got a little something Hey, Emily! Robbie! Sorry you guys had to leave the party early! But that new dance you taught us is sick! - Uh - Oh.
Uh-oh, uh-oh! Uh-oh, uh-oh! Just go.
Just go, just go! Just go, just go! Just go! What are you guys doing? We saw a hairy, hooded creature outside, so Joe called 911.
Yeah, I talked to Nancy.
She's from Malibu.
Loves sea glass.
See what I've been dealing with here? - What's going on? - Ask your daughter.
I took your car to the party, mom.
What? I'm sorry.
Look, it was all my fault.
I pressured her into it.
No, you didn't.
No, don't blame him.
I knew what I was doing, but I Did it anyway.
Say good night, Robbie.
I'm really sorry, Mr.
and Mrs.
hobbs.
- Bye, Em.
- Bye, Robbie.
I'll probably never drive again, but I had fun.
Me too, cray cray.
- Not now.
- Mmhmm.
Yeah, go upstairs.
We'll talk later.
You too.
Go across the street, right now.
Get outta here.
It's right across the street, so don't have a party on the way.
I think he knows I mean business, even though my voice ain't as deep as my sister's.
Hello, folks.
Do you recognize this man? Anyone? - All right.
- Oh, come on, come on! He's ours, he's ours.
So he was telling the truth.
You had him spying on your kid while he was trying to babysit.
It was my wife's idea.
You hid him in a car trunk to spy on our daughter.
No, no, no, you talked me into it, honey.
- All right, all right.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Calm down.
Maybe you two should trust your kids more.
At least that's what my wife told me when I had a detective follow my daughter on prom night.
You have that service? Good night folks.
Maybe he's right.
Maybe we should just loosen up on Emily a little bit.
What do you think? No.
Could be why Emily acts like that every time Robbie's around.
You know what.
I think both of them need to blow off a little steam.
I love my sister, but she doesn't give him an inch.
Just like in the movie "Footloose".
You outlaw dancing, the kids gonna find a way to dance anyway.
I can't believe this.
You had Kevin spying on me.
Oh, we're sorry.
It was your fist time but you did the right thing.
Calling 911.
Which is why Next Saturday we're gonna go out again and you get to babysit Janie again.
Noooooooooooo.
Don't worry if anything happens we can always call Nancy.