Stella (2012) s03e05 Episode Script

Truce, then, Mr Jackson? Truce, then, Mrs Morris.
Excuse me.
Do you want me to finish you off? Do you want to finish off? I'm sorry, Em.
That was really stupid of me.
No, it wasn't.
I think you should go home right now.
Silver piece of shit! Please leave your message after the tone.
Marcus, it's me.
Again.
Erm Look, do you think we could have a chat today? It's been nearly a week now and, erm It's doing my head in.
You've hardly said a word to me since you know.
I don't want to lose my job over this but at the moment, I'm hating coming to work.
It's horrible.
Right, I've sorted the rotas.
Don't forget, Julie's at her sister's wedding, - so I've asked Anna to cover.
- Okay.
Faster, faster! And the rep from Finches will be in on Wednesday.
- Yep.
- Faster! Faster! And Amy will ask if she can leave early on Friday, say no.
- Okay.
- Faster! Faster! Right, that's us.
Come on, kids.
Let's go.
Come on, then.
Be good for your mum, yeah? - And one last thing - What? Don't throw any wild parties while I'm away and trash the house.
- Collette - Yeah? Safe journey.
You have one new message.
Marcus it's It's me.
Again.
Look, do you Do you think we could have a chat? Message deleted Don't look at me like that.
It's actually very well-written.
- This one of your textbooks, is it? - Oi! "Suki could feel his hot breath against the back of her neck.
"He moaned in pain" It's not even mine! It's probably your Aunty Paula's.
Oh, Aunty Paula's.
I thought so.
He'll have his breakfast over Jag and Tan's.
Blimey.
That dress is a bit much for work, isn't it? It's called fashion, Mam.
You should try it sometime.
Luke, you going to give me a lift, then, or what? Don't ask me.
I have no idea.
- I'll see you, Zo! Ta-ra! Hey! Why aren't you ready for school? Work experience.
Oh, God! I meant to ask Bobby for you.
Did you get something sorted? - I'm doing it.
- Doing what? We're in the middle of a global economic meltdown.
This is me, experiencing it.
Oh, Christ, Zo, I hope Jack doesn't turn out to be a smartarse like this one.
There's no milk again.
- So go and buy some.
- I can't.
I'm grounded.
- Do you want me and Jack to go? - No, you're all right, love.
I could do with the fresh air, to be honest.
Stupid thing! You'll flood the engine doing that.
Thanks, but I know what I'm doing.
No, you don't.
Pop the bonnet up and I'll take a look.
What do you know about cars? Well, nothing, unless you open her up.
Now, come on! Oh, under the dash, on the right.
- I'm impressed.
- Mmm Well, a lifetime of owning crappy cars, see, every cloud Don't worry, Dad, I'll walk.
See you, Stella.
So long, presh.
Okay, darling.
Bye.
Sorry.
Yep, you've definitely flooded the engine and your manifold's cracked.
Jesus Christ! - Oh, my God! - Get it off! It's locked again! Well, unlock it, then! Okay, after three, one, two What are you counting for Okay.
You're all right.
I know what to do because I am a nurse.
Well, a trainee nurse, anyway.
Er Peas! Peas? Where are they training you? The Little Chef? Right.
The schedule for this week.
Very quiet.
And, Dai Davies, you haven't got nothing! Again.
That's because I'm not one of your drivers, I'm your partner.
Pity you're not a silent one right now.
Yanto, you're on the all-inclusive night out up Reflections.
See that Rylan off of the X Factor What a joke.
Ladies night, is it? I've not been specific because I'm not one for gender stereotyping but there'll be a heavy bias for sure.
Hold up.
A busful of women and my Doggy Man? You're all right, Chihuahua.
I know which side my bread is buttered.
It's not you I'm worried about.
It's them.
They can smell the oxytocin on him, see? Reeks of the stuff.
Sorry, is this the right place to make a bus booking? Celia, hello.
- Indeed, come in, take a seat.
- Could be.
It depends.
It's for the Applefield Care Home.
Up in Porthallam.
Ooh, I don't know, we're very busy at the moment.
What? It would be a regular contract, hospital shuttle, once a week.
Pick up tomorrow at 2:00? I suppose if I shift some stuff about.
And we want Alan Williams to do it.
- You do? - Yes.
So can you do it or not? - Why not? - Dai Davies, please! Why not? Great.
Well, I'll see you tomorrow, then.
- Don't be late, will you? - I won't.
And try not to lose any of 'em this time, is it? Senior citizens can move very fast, despite their what-yer-call.
So, we'll see you in six weeks.
Emma, when you've finished that, can I have a word in the office, please? Yeah, I won't be long.
Hey, maybe he's going to give you a pay rise! - It's freezing.
- Oh, stop mewling.
It's meant to be cold, numbs the pain.
I think I liked you better as a mechanic than a nurse.
Did you? Better keep it raised.
Stops the blood flow.
- But it isn't bleeding.
- Isn't it? I hadn't noticed.
- Oh! - What're you doing? Oh, my God.
I'm so sorry! - No, no, it's fine.
- No, it's not.
Really.
It is.
I'm on drugs, you see.
- Are you? - What? No, not them kind of drugs.
Prescription drugs, and they're making me a bit - Crazy? - Disinhibited.
So, I shouldn't take it as a compliment, then? - That's what you're saying.
- Oh, God, no! Not at all! - Could have been anyone.
- Literally anyone with a pulse.
I don't find you remotely attractive.
Wow, what a confidence booster.
Mam, did you get the milk yet? Er, no, because Michael hurt his hand and, erm - Anyway, we all done now? - Yeah.
Think so.
Good, 'cause I got to get on, really.
Er, no school today, Ben? No.
Work experience.
Except I haven't got none because my mother forgot to organise it.
Yeah, all right! Oh, that's a shame.
Er, you can come to our place if it's just for the day.
Will I get to meet any criminals? Like bank robbers and stuff? - Not really.
- Nah, I think I'll leave it, then.
Er, excuse me, you will not bloody well leave it, Benjamin Morris.
That's extremely kind of you, Michael.
- Say thank you.
- Thank you.
Mmm.
And go and get changed, please.
School trousers, not jeans.
- Thanks for that.
- No problem.
- I'll, er, wait out the front.
- Yeah, probably best.
Oh, God.
Sit down.
You don't look like a smoker.
I only do it when I'm stressed.
Okay, five years ago, I met somebody else.
- And I had an affair.
- Right.
It nearly cost me my marriage.
And I promised Collette it would never ever happen again.
We only kissed It cannot ever happen again, do you understand me? Am I being fired? What? No, of course not.
Emma, you're going to make a really good hairdresser and I don't want your career getting ruined by some stupid mistake, okay? Okay.
So let's just draw a line under it and move on.
It never happened, agreed? Yeah.
Your mum's coming in this morning, I hear? Good.
Well, er, I look forward to meeting her.
I know you're not happy, Marcus.
- Have you read all these books? - Yes, I have.
- Ow.
- And are they all about law? Er, different aspects, it's a complicated system.
Probate, conveyancing, divorce.
- My mam's divorced.
- Yes, she did mention it.
Ages ago, mind, from my dad, and then she met this bloke called Sean who had a Harley and everything but he was too nice or something, which I don't get.
And then she went off with Rob Morgan, who's my brother's dad but he's not my dad, 'cause he did a bunk to Canada when she got pregnant with Luke and then he came back but that didn't work 'cause she didn't want to leave Pontyberry.
Is that everyone? Well there was this bloke from Newport, who made a clucking noise, apparently, so he had to go.
Wow.
Can I photocopy my head? Well, that's hardly going to teach you anything, is it? I know, but I'm bored.
Look, Ben, you're lucky to get this opportunity.
It took me six months of letter writing and rejections to get my first internship.
Why? Because these opportunities are like gold dust! The legal profession is an honourable and noble craft.
We fight for the rights of people, we get Like Lenny Mack, you mean? Why do you mention Lenny Mack? I saw his file on your shelf.
Those files are strictly confidential.
My dad says Lenny Mack's scum 'cause of what he did to Luke.
Don't you feel bad defending scum, Mike? It's Michael.
And I've got a prison visit now.
Oh, can I come? No, you can stay here and sort out this filing and read a chapter from this book all about the British justice system and why every citizen has the right to a fair trial, no matter who they are.
And I'll be testing you on it when I get back.
Okay? Worse than school, this.
Nothing more satisfying than fitting a new bonnet bra to your engine.
Yeah.
Listen, Yant, this oxytocin Verv was on about, where can I get some? In theory.
If I wanted to, which I probably don't.
You're talking love hormone there, Al.
Buyer beware.
There's this possible woman, see.
I I want to ask her out but "The biggest adventure what we can ever take "is to live the life of our dreams.
" Oprah Winfrey, that is.
And I do live by it every day.
- Just ask her.
- Oprah? No, man! Celia.
- Ask Celia what? - Nothing.
- Alan wants to ask her out.
- Oh! Confident women like confident men, Al.
You're right there, Dai Davies.
And what I like to do when I need a little something extra is imagine I'm someone else, someone with authority, like a conductor.
- Bus? - Orchestra.
Get yourself a baton, something classical, bit of Vivaldi, perhaps, you'll be amazed by the results.
Excuse me.
Dai Davies.
Ah, how's it hanging, Daddy? No, no, can't say I am.
I was in test driving these two last week but I'm still none the wiser.
- Well, I know which one I'd have.
- Go on.
This one.
It's in beautiful condition.
Two owners from new, both kept full service history.
Runs like a dream.
And don't ask me how, but I also know they're a bugger to nick.
Do you want to have a look inside? Might I have a word, please, Luke? In my office? I'll be with you in a moment, Mrs Jones.
Oh, great.
Because I've decided I'll take this one.
Cash.
Born salesman this one is, Dai.
Morning, bewt.
Jag.
Good morning.
Aunty Brenda.
Mrs Aunty Brenda to you, sunshine! You want to keep an eye on that one, good girl, he got deep pockets.
And I'm not being metaphorical.
Hey, that's racist, that is, I haven't nicked nothing! Yet.
Don't worry, Uncky Jag.
I've got all me eyes on him.
Look.
Put this lot up in the window, would you? Sure thing, that'll be £1 .
20 per flyer per week.
You what? Charging for the window? What happened to local business people supporting each other? I hope this isn't your idea, Jagadeesh Choudary? - Actually, it's mine.
- Let me explain It's daylight robbery! Even Dick Turpin wore a mask! Aunty Brenda, please You're a highly valued customer.
Please, please, Aunty Brenda! It's just an idea.
It's an experiment.
- And the rest.
- You what? Well, either that's a bottle of vodka in your pants or you're over the moon to see me.
You can keep it if you like.
Yeah? What's the catch? No catch.
It's on the house.
However, as we say in the old country, "If you've got room for a drink in your pocket, "you've got room for a girl in your heart.
" Do you want tea or coffee? Please say tea, 'cause our Nespresso machine's doing my nut in.
All right, then, tea.
Ta.
Hiya, you must be Stella.
I'm Marcus.
Oh, nice to meet you! You look more like Emma's sister than her mother.
Oh, don't be daft! Thanks, Marcus.
Aw.
He's a charmer, isn't he? Yeah, I suppose so.
So, Mrs Morris, you going anywhere nice on your holidays? What are you doing? I just been texting my friend.
He is not going to believe me! This kid in school, Joe Cotter, his dad's been done for fraud! I just been reading about it! What? Hang on.
I told you those files were confidential! You can't just Give me that! Michael, you've got to see what Andy's done.
He's so great with Photoshop.
Oh! Sorry, I didn't know you were with someone.
You're all right.
I'm work experience.
Work experience, how lovely! Shouldn't you have run that by us, Mike? It's just for a day.
My mam sorted it.
Oh, your mum's the next-door-neighbour.
How very sweet of you to help her out like that.
Did you actually want something or Yes, just wanted to show you where we are with the Gala Dinner.
The tickets are selling really well.
Making a pretty hefty wedge for charity.
And we wanted to show you the place settings for on the night.
I'm not really interested, to be honest.
I told you he'd be like this! Force yourself, Michael.
This event keeps us in people's minds.
Makes us part of the community and most importantly, it brings us in business, okay? Well, we could just advertise more.
Oh, for God's sake! It's just a bit of dinner and a dance.
Even you can manage that, can't you? So what are you laughing at? Sorry, this just isn't working.
Go sit in reception.
You'll have to go home.
I've just tidied it up a bit, that's all.
Oh, Em, I love it.
You're actually really good, aren't you? Ah, don't sound so surprised.
God! You've knocked years off her! Mutton is a tough bite without a bit of garnish, eh, Stell? Thanks.
You here to get an appointment, Aunty Brenda? Good God, no.
I wouldn't let someone as underqualified as you go near my hair! Anyway, Myrna would go holistic! No, what it was, I come to give out these.
Tomorrow night, up Reflections.
See that Rylan off of X Factor - I need a busful.
- Let's have a look.
You'll come, won't you, girls? Sounds like a laugh, doesn't it, Em? Stell, you fancy it? Aw, I don't think it's meant for me, presh.
I stepped away from my sparkly boob tube in 1983.
And to be honest, it was long overdue even then! Charming! Marcus, you coming? While the cat's away and all that Not that Collette is a cat or nothing.
I'd love to but it's a lads night.
And you're worried you couldn't keep up with us girls? I know I couldn't.
I've seen you in action don't forget.
Ah, don't, man! Hey, I'll tell you what, I'll take some up the hospital if you like, give them out to the nurses.
Fine, but you tell them they pay the damages.
I know nurses.
Depravity on a stick.
So long! Ben? What's the matter? What is your problem? Right, wait in the car, please.
And say sorry to Michael.
- Sorry.
- No, really, it was nothing.
Just not the right day for it, erm Look, I'm aware that what's happened today might make things a bit, er, awkward between us.
Yeah, I know and like I said, I don't know what came over me.
I mean, you're nice-looking and all, but you're just not my type.
Right.
Actually, I meant my sending Ben home, not you, you know Yeah, yeah.
Stella! So sorry it didn't work out with your boy.
Some kids just aren't suitable for this sort of thing.
And to be honest with you, Michael really should've checked with us first.
- Yeah, okay.
Thanks, Jan.
- Yeah, anyway, better be going.
I'm at the hospital all day tomorrow, lots to do.
Ooh, nothing too serious, I hope? No, I'm a nurse, remember? Well, training to be.
Well done, you.
How brave to go back and start studying at your age.
Thanks.
Thanks a lot.
Tell you who you remind me of, Len? That Nicole Kidman.
After she got her divorce through from Tom Cruise.
Right.
- And you know what she did next? - No.
She never got married to Tom Cruise again.
You think about it.
Ta-ra.
Dad, if you've got porridge stuck on one of my copper bottoms again, I'll go mental.
Sorry, son.
Sorry.
I'm really glad you changed your mind.
Yeah, well, I just thought, "Come on, Stella Morris, you're not quite over the hill yet.
" You sure you don't fancy coming, Zo? - God, no, thanks.
- Hey, leave her out of it! I'll be ready for my bed by half-eight.
Come on.
So if they're staying in, why do I have to go to Aunty Brenda's? Because I don't trust you and Aunty Brenda won't let you out of her sight! But I'm 15! By next year I could be married, in the army, with a moustache.
And if and when that happens, I might let you out for your honeymoon.
- So long.
- See you, presh.
Looking forward to later, Ben.
We can have a catch on the sofa and watch my new Call the Midwife DVD, is it? - Morning.
- Hiya.
- It's false imprisonment.
- Oh, don't be daft.
Michael'll tell you! Isn't it illegal for her to force me to stay at Aunty Brenda's tonight when I don't want to? - Don't think it is, actually.
- See? But you can come to ours if you like.
Katie's staying over.
We're having pizza.
No, it's fine.
I've already sorted it now.
Oh, please? Go on.
Oh! All right, Aunty Brenda, change of plan.
Yes! Ben is now staying in with Michael and Katie.
Ah, I get it.
Traded me in for a younger model, have you, Benny Boy? Well, you fill your boots, son.
Oh, this family is shaming.
Oh, thanks.
And if he gets on your nerves or starts rifling through your documents, just send him over the road.
Hmm.
Okay.
You're coming undone, by the way.
- Sorry? - Unravelling.
- Oh, this.
- Tell you what.
I got five minutes.
Come inside and I'll re-do it.
Erm, ah And don't worry, I won't bite.
Or try and kiss you again.
- Are they meant to be that big? - Of course they are.
I'm starting to think you might have done this to me deliberately for your course work.
You want to watch yourself next week, then, 'cause we'll be inserting catheters.
There you go, all done.
Thanks.
I'm in all evening, so send Ben round whenever.
Off anywhere exciting? Erm She's going to see Rylan off the X Factor I'm regretting it already.
I think it might be a bit much.
I doubt anything phases you, Mrs Morris.
- See you.
- Bye.
What? Nothing.
I'm going to work.
That's it! I told you what she was like.
Are you calling me a cheat? Well, are you? Excuse me, ladies, I'm looking for Celia Stay out of this, boy! Right.
Alan.
Sorry.
I was getting Jaffa Cakes.
They get a bit rowdy when they're hungry.
I heard that! We're not all deaf, you know.
Are we, Lil? Lil? - Wait here and I'll get the others.
- Great.
Nice to see you again, by the way.
- Did you sign in? - No.
Well, you should have done.
You'll be lucky, boy.
Right.
Know what this is? Er, Mrs Wong? Close, but no.
Skin.
Now, where skin is concerned, it'll come as a surprise to everyone that it's the biggest organ you got.
It's not the biggest organ I've got! Yes, Tom, I can assure you it is.
Whoo! Oh, grow up.
No one's penis is as big as his skin, not even Tom's.
What's this? Oh, sorry, Cheryl, I was just giving them out for my aunty.
Some of us lot are going.
Act your age, Stella Morris.
This is not the kind of thing a middle-aged trainee nurse should be doing or be seen doing.
It's undignified.
If I saw someone like you at something like this, it'd make me feel physically sick.
Ramp, Alan.
Oh! Certainly, madam, let's take the lift to the penthouse, shall we? Bloody idiot.
- Dorothy.
- No, it's fine.
Understood.
I'll keep schtum.
Actually, I was wondering if you'd like to come out for dinner with me sometime? - Ooh! - No, I would not! Pervert.
- No, no, I didn't meant you.
- Call the police! - Now look what you've done.
- He's trying to molest me.
- I did not mean you - Calm down.
That's enough! Don't make me take your Berrocas off you again.
He shouldn't be driving.
I don't know.
Bloody hell! I'd get a move on if I were you and don't make eye contact with her when you get there.
Right.
Will do.
Alan? I'd love to.
That is if you were asking me out and not Dorothy? Yes.
Yes, I was.
I'm not a pervert.
Good.
And make it somewhere nice, will you? No half-bucket of clucky chicken from the high street, right? Okay.
Get a bloody move on, man! How's business, Benno? It's good.
Sold all my stock.
Well, let me know if you want any more.
All right? All right? How did you know I'd be here? You're unemployed and you nick booze from shops.
A park bench isn't that wild a guess.
Oi! Less of that.
I'll have you know I'm an entrepreneur.
Oh, you're even sexier when you're angry.
Now, pass me a drink, gorgeous.
Oh, good boy.
Oh Good boy.
Guess who? - Lenny? - Just got out yesterday.
I wanted to surprise you.
Look, sorry we didn't come visit, it's just they started searching Jack's pushchair and I freaked out and Hey, I'm glad.
I don't ever want him going to that place.
It's not right.
Never should've asked.
You got nothing to be sorry for.
Can I? Yeah.
- Sorry, it is - Yeah, it is.
The picture I got's dead old now.
Come on, then, mate.
Eh? I got him a present.
Ooh.
Huh? Come on, Jack, say hi to your dada.
Dada.
Oi, Lenny.
When did you get out, bewt? - I got to go.
- Please don't.
Sorry.
Another day.
You total bellend.
What did I do? I'm back now, Uncle.
Where in heaven's name have you been? You're nearly 20 minutes over your break time.
I know.
I totally know and do you know why? Why? Ah no, me, neither.
I'm very, very sorry, though.
Very, very sorry.
Well, don't do it again.
I'll be upstairs if you need me.
- You sure about this? - Totally.
This is a CCCTV blind spot.
They can't see a thing when you're here.
Is that right? Not a thing.
I'm off now, Dai.
Oh! Um, before you go, I meant to give you this.
- What for? - Commission.
For selling that car yesterday.
I've not seen skills like that since silver-tongued Mary worked this manor.
- But she went on to other things.
- Stretch limos? No, prison.
Guess you're doing it the other way round.
Yeah, never again.
I've got a much better plan than that, just wish I'd sold her a pricier car now.
Got the bug now, see? You've got the bug! Oh! Yes! Hey, Jack, doesn't your nana look nice? - She's a glamorous granny, aren't you? - A GILF, apparently.
- Ew, Mam! - Stella! Do you even know what that stands for? - Who's a GILF? - Nobody.
Nothing.
What's that? This is where we are spending the night! What? - We can't afford this! - Yes, we can.
Dai Davies gave me commission on my unintentional car sale.
- Shut up! - Oh, well done, babes.
It's one of them last-minute internet jobbies.
And I got you a manicure when you get there and everything.
But what about the kids? I got Abhra too, tonight.
Oh, Aunty Brenda'll have him, won't she? - Yeah.
- And Jack is coming with us.
So, come on, then, get packing! Hello! Who's your new friend? Where'd you get this? Is he coming too, little fella? Hiya.
- Oh, hello.
- All right? - Tonight's dinner.
- I thought you were having pizza? - We are.
Making it myself from scratch.
- Bloody hell.
- Impressive.
- He can get you off a shoplifting charge and do you a Sunday roast! Every Pontyberry girl's dream, that.
Anyway, better go.
- Have a nice time.
- So long.
Bye.
Get a move on, will you? These boots aren't meant for standing.
Aw, it's nice to see you smiling, presh.
I've been worried about you.
- Yeah.
- Is it work? Um, it was, but it isn't no more.
All right, Yant? You going to park this up and join us later, are you? Take a seat please, Nadine.
There's no standing room on this bus.
Calm down, Verv.
I'm not here for pleasure, as it goes.
I'm recruiting.
The ladies' toilets at Reflections is like a honey pot of self-doubt and insecurity come midnight.
- I've seen it myself.
Not pretty.
- Seen what? When? Hiya! Oh, I'm starting to think this might have been a bad idea.
I'm too old.
- Oh, rubbish! - Stella! We're on the Vodibulls.
- Is that as dangerous as it sounds? - Worse.
- Hold on, am I the only bloke here? - No! Not including the bus driver.
Well, yeah, but don't worry, there'll be loads of fellas when we get there.
Excuse me! I thought you didn't approve of all this? I don't approve of you doing it, but for me it's a different story.
I know my strengths, my weaknesses and my capacities.
I also happen to know yours.
- Onwards.
Whoo-hoo! # looking for the next top model # Who's wearing something new and something old And something borrowed, I know this crazy life can be - Dinner won't be long! - Okay! Seriously, if we'd had the stock, I could have doubled our profits.
Yeah, me, too.
Now what? - Re-invest.
Yeah.
- Re-invest.
Let's do it.
Who knows how much money we could've made by the end of the month? It might be worth seeing what other stock he's got.
He mentioned clothing.
Well, I'd be happy to project manage on this next one.
- You sure you can handle it? - Oh, I'm sure.
It's on the table.
- What are you two grinning about? - Nothing.
- I am starving! - Yeah, me, too.
How comes we still have to queue? I thought the ticket was all-inclusive.
They just do it to build up the excitement.
Of what, seeing Rylan? I don't even know who he is.
Course you do.
Him off of X Factor, man.
He used to have a ruck with Gary Barlow every week.
And he done Big Brother I cockin' idolises him.
Rhian! Why didn't you come on the bus with us? I'm not lining Aunty bastard Brenda's pockets for no-cockin'-body.
Oh, my God, there he is! That's Rylan! - Is it? - Come on, let's go in with him.
Nadine, man! Look bored.
We're with him.
Cheers.
See? Cordon bleu menu, the lot.
I'm impressed.
And would madam like a window seat with a sea view? Yes, madam would.
Then follow me.
Aw thank you.
Thank you so much.
Who wants to hear Spice Girls? This one's for you.
Let's do it.
The Spice Girls? He is such a cliché! # Yo, I'll tell you what I want what I really really want # So tell me what you want what you really really want # I'll tell you what I want what I really really want - Do you want another one? - Yeah, go on, then.
# I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna # Really really really wanna ziga ziga # If you want my future, forget my past # If you want to get with me, better make it fast - # Now don't go wasting - My God.
My precious time, get your act together .
.
Mam, I'll see you later.
- Where are you going? - Don't wait up! I've just seen an old friend.
Emma? Emma! Hey, you dancing or what? # Really really really wanna ziga ziga If you wanna be my lover # You gotta get with my friends Make it last forever, friendship never ends What are you doing here? Ems, I can't stop thinking about you.
- But yesterday you said you couldn't - I know what I said.
Jesus, could this be any more unromantic? You're bloody selfish, the pair of you! This is a disabled toilet, you know! - Oh, my God! - Let's get out of here.
- But where can we go? - My house? Serious? Yeah, I want to.
- Sorry.
- People like you make me sick.
Yeah! You're not the only ones wanting a shag, you know! He's out like a light.
That's the sea air for you.
His first little holiday.
Zo, there's something I want to ask you.
Yeah, I thought so.
Did you? Luke, what you got to remember is that Jack has to come first.
- I know that.
- And, like, Lenny may be an idiot - but he's always - Whoa, hang on.
- What's Lenny got to do with anything? - Sorry? Just Let me do this properly, will you? Do what? Zoe Annabelle Stewart, will you do me the honour of becoming Mrs Zoe Annabelle Morgan? - That's what you wanted to ask me? - That's what I wanted to ask you.
Uh, say something, my knee's killing me on this floor and people are starting to stare.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes! I love you so much, Zoe.
You and Jack and whoever this one in here turns out to be You're my world.
- You know that, don't you? - I do.
I completely loved you on X Factor Yeah, you were awesome, fair play.
- Aw, thanks, babes.
- I never watched it.
Sorry.
That's all right, don't be sorry.
Mind, it was out of cockin' order the way that Gary Barlow treated you.
Aw, no, no, he's all right.
He's fine.
He done Blubber Busters.
Doesn't admit it, like, but he did.
Well, if I ever bastard met him, I have to give it to him straight.
I'd say, "Oi! Barlow! "You were out of cockin' order with Rylan, by here Good boy!" Oh, no, babe, babe, babe.
Babe, it's fine.
It was all TV.
We're good mates, you know, I've got his number Oh, my God! You joking? Let me see! Will you sign it? Go on, go on, sign it.
Oh, I am so sorry about my friend.
He's had too much to drink.
Don't be silly, it's fine.
There you go, babe.
Oi, Barlow! I cockin' loves you, I do! I gotta go - Thank you! - Bye! - Bye, good luck, then! - Ta-ra, Rylan! - Goodbye! - See you later! Bye! Cheers! - Bye! - Good night, love! And I love you.
- Ooh! - Do you, presh? No, I do.
I fucking love this woman.
- Whoa! - Oh, sorry, did I get that wrong? I always get that wrong.
Yeah, you really did.
I thought you were gay! Me? Oh, because I'm a nurse? That's sexist, that is.
I'm disappointed in you.
No, not 'cause of the nurse thing.
- 'Cause of the Spice Girls - I'm not gay.
- And the Rylan thing - Hey, I'll prove it to you, if you want.
Whoa! You have had too much to drink, good boy.
- Come on - Where are you taking me? Home.
# I just want you back for good # Want you back, want you back # Want you back, want you back Want you back for good Let's make love.
No, let's just find my housekeys, is it? I'm not going anywhere till you promise me we'll make love.
Oh, right.
Get inside, quick.
Come on.
Tom, man! Look, will you let go of the wall? - Please! - Hi.
Oh Sorry to, uh, interrupt.
I just wanted to let you know that Ben couldn't hack it on the sofa.
He insisted on going back to yours.
Oh, right.
Okay, thanks.
This is Tom, from work.
Nice to meet you.
Stella! Stop yapping and get your sexy arse in here.
What's he like? Oh, we've had a brilliant time! Anyway, thanks for babysitting.
No worries.
- So long! - Bye, then.
I just wondered if you wanted to come to a ball with me? If you come anywhere near my family again - Sorry, whose family? - You'll wish you hadn't You're not threatening me, are you, Luke? We'll do, won't we? You've got such a pretty face.
You could be one of those plus-size models.
I'm not going to be able to keep my hands off you.
So don't.