Tangled: The Series (2017) s03e05 Episode Script

1 (theme song playing) I got the wind in my hair and a fire within 'Cause there's something beginning I got a mystery to solve and excitement to spare That beautiful breeze blowing through I'm ready to follow it who knows where I'll get there, I swear With the wind in my hair Alright, Eugene, agenda me.
Okie dokie.
We're gonna start off with what promises to be tons of fun, the semi-annual wheat crop report.
Already reviewed, and I know you were kidding, but, believe it or not, it was fun.
Next, you've gotta approve the design for the castle's new footbridge.
Did it this morning.
In fact, while I was at it, I designed a few more footbridges.
Or would it be feetbridge? - Woof! - What? I'm used to getting a lot done by 7:15.
What about breakfast? Breakfast? I eat motivation for breakfast.
(squeak) Well, and cherry croissants.
Thanks, Pascal.
(chuckle) You know, I gotta say, sunshine, even I Ah! Cass' sparring dummy? Oh, that's rich.
Cass isn't even here, and she still finds a way to annoy me.
(cart squeaking) Mrs.
Crowley, what are you doing with Cassandra's things? Meh.
She's gone, so now it's junk.
Now, just a minute.
I have faith that Cass will return, so kindly put her things back where you found them.
Sure.
While I'm at it, are there any beds you would like me to unmake, or trash that needs to be brought back in, Your Highness? No, no.
I guess I'll just do it.
Help yourself.
I'm on my break.
The rest of her stuff is in the storage vault.
(squeak) (Rapunzel grunting) Cass' stuff has gotta be here somewhere.
Ah ha! (scraping) (humming) Oh, it's Cass' things alright.
Look, her shield, her mace Aww.
Her lucky halberd head.
Look, I know you love Cass, and I can totally understand why you'd want her back in your life.
But don't forget that she betrayed you.
She's still a friend.
I just don't wanna see you get hurt anymore, that's all.
It's time to put yourself first and let her go.
Eugene, friends don't leave friends behind.
Okay? I need you to understand that.
Rapunzel, she's the one who left you.
Hey! (chuckles) Look what I found.
(chuckles) For once, they even got your nose right! Not to mention that this is so very awkward.
It's okay, Lance.
(smash, clatter) EUGENE: I-I got it, I got it! (humming) - (clink) - I think I'm gonna go outside.
Get some air and reorganize this stuff.
(blade clinking) (sighs) I remember painting this, Pascal.
All these things have their own story.
(squeaking) - Wait, what's this? - (humming) Hmm? This isn't Cassandra's.
- (whining) - Whoa! - (glass shatters) - (air rushing) (cough) Ah Well, I can't say that wasn't weird.
- MAN: Thieves! - THIEF: Hey, careful! That egg's priceless! Come on, Burnsie, you're gonna get us caught! - What? Burns whoa! - Go, go, go! Stop, thieves! Now, just hold on! Okay? You had better tell me who you are right now? Uh, w-what are you staring at, Burnsie? Am I finally growing facial hair? (horse neighing) (snorts) (whinnying) Oh! Not him again.
Lance, apple pie! Oh, yeah.
(whinnying) (guards yelling) (snort) YOUNG EUGENE: Quick, in here.
(yelling) (snort) (Pascal squeaking) Phew! (laughing) No more gruel for us! Tonight, we eat lobster! (laugh) Not to mention, we'll finally be able to pay off the Baron.
This is crazy! A young Lance and Eugene? It can't be! Who's the man? You're the man! (chuckles) Uh, what is wrong with your face? I-it's just a little something I've been cooking up.
I call it, "The Blaze.
" Blaze? (laugh) It's barely a smolder.
RAPUNZEL: Yep, that's them alright.
And either they found the fountain of youth, or Pascal! That's the poster from when I went missing! We just went back in time.
But, why do they seem to know us? They keep calling me Burns - (gasp) - (Pascal squeaks) - Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, - (grunting) oh my gosh, oh my gosh Burnsie! Shh! Keep it down! I heard something this way.
Okay.
So, apparently, we're trapped in the bodies of the teenage Stabbingtons? - (squeak) - I don't know, but for now, uh, we go with it, and try to remain calm until we can figure out what's happening.
GUARD: We know you boys are in there.
We have the building surrounded.
Alright, nobody panic.
We can get out of this if we all work together Great, they ditched us.
Where are the other two? Uh, to be honest, I don't even know where I am right now, so GUARD: Take these wise guys to the wagon.
We'll find the others.
Ah.
The old mannequin shenanigans.
Works every time.
Oof, uh-huh.
(grunting) You think we should, uh, help with the Stabbies? You know the rule, Lance.
Every man for himself.
Besides, I'm sure they're fine.
(metal clangs) (banging) (banging continues) (screeching) (sighs) Relax, okay? Breathe.
I can get us out of this.
I am well-versed in Corona laws, so we'll probably only be detained for a night.
CAPTAIN: You two scrubs are wanted in all seven kingdoms.
You're going away for a long time.
(locks door) (nickering) Looks like somebody wants to help haul the wagon, - doesn't he, Stan? - It sure does, Pete.
(squeaking) (nickering) (gasp) Max! (squeak) Aw, teenage Max was so cute! (grumbling) (Stan chuckling) Aw, it's okay, Max.
Maybe one day, you'll be big enough.
Who knows, maybe even a horse in the Royal Guard.
You go ahead We've gotta get back to our own time, but first, we've gotta get out of here.
Hmm I think I know what will do the trick.
(using "tough guy" voice) Hey, Patchy.
We might be behind bars, but I'll tell you what the real crime is.
(scoff) That guard's mustache.
(neighing) RAPUNZEL: You know, I'll tell you who should have a mustache.
His partner.
Now, that guy has a stache face.
(neighing) I told you I should be the mustache guy.
Nobody said you can't.
Nah, you can't both be the mustache guy.
You know, he's right.
It's just ridiculous.
You're ridiculous.
I'm sorry, but your face and your mustache, - they just don't go together.
- (gasp) How dare you.
I'm - (slapping) - (indistinct arguing) (squeak) (yelling continues) - PETE: Cut it out! Ow! - STAN: Ow! Okay.
Xavier has all kinds of books on mystical stuff, so if there's a way to get back home, this is where we'll find it.
(shrieks) - (clang) - Ow! Gah, forgot that I'm a foot taller.
- (crashing) - (screech) (squeaking) Pascal, you genius! Okay, okay, okay.
"The hourglass," blah blah blah, "has great power," yada yada yada "It will send any who fall within its mist forward or backward in time 10 years?" STAN: Hurry up, mustache man, they went this way! - Quick, the secret passage.
- PETE: Again with the insults? - STAN: How is that an insult - How did he open this again? PETE: I know sarcasm when I hear it.
(rumbling) So, that's why we're the Stabbingtons.
They must have been the two people closest to where we traveled through time! Okay, we gotta break into the castle and steal the hourglass, so we can get back home, Pascal.
(squeaking) True.
If we're gonna pull a castle heist, we're gonna need some help.
(laughing) Now that we don't have to split the profits with the Stabbingtons, I'm gonna take Stalyan out on a really fancy date.
I'm talking a place with tables and napkins and utensils You know, a nice place.
Hello! - EUGENE: W-what?! - Um (clears throat) I mean, um, (using "tough guy" voice) hello, jerks.
We have another, um, opportunity we thought you two might be interested in.
Nah, we're all set.
Besides, I'm surprised you came back.
We left you and Ugly high and dry back there.
Me and Ug (gasp) Who's ugly? He's not ugly.
He's adorable.
Who's adorable? You are! You are, buddy! That's right, my little buddy.
Uh, you feeling okay, Sideburns? Oh, right.
Nah, he's ugly.
And tough.
We're both tough.
Nothi nothing but a couple of tough guys over here.
(Eugene and Lance exclaiming) (struggling) (gasp) You told me there was only one egg! There was! After I took the first one.
You tried to cheat Lance? Ha! I shoulda known! You were always trying to cheat me, Flynn.
I'm not always trying to cheat you, Lance.
Alright, let's call it 70-30.
You're a selfish jerk, you know that?! Yeah, well, being a selfish jerk is how you get ahead in this world.
Oh, that's it! (indistinct yelling) - (glass smashing) - (squeaks) YOUNG EUGENE: Lance! (clears throat) After some spirited discourse, Lance and I have decided we'd like to partake in your opportunity as we have recently come into some rather, let's call it, unfortunate financial limitations.
(glass tinkling) RAPUNZEL: Wise choice, boys.
So, what's the mark? - The royal vault.
- (squeak) - Come again? - You say what now? Once it's dark, we'll creep in through a small crack in the curtain walls surrounding the castle.
Then, we'll make our entry here.
Uh, that's the guard's tower.
You know, where all the guards hang out.
We'll never be able to sneak past them.
We won't have to sneak past them.
We're gonna sneak under them.
EUGENE: Wait, how do you know all this, Sideburns? LANCE: Quiet, Flynn! Let the man talk.
RAPUNZEL: From there, we take the west corridor.
LANCE: But, that's the long way around! RAPUNZEL: Yes, but it's closed for cleaning at that time, - so it's virtually empty.
- (spits) (squeaking) (metal scrapes) (groan) (grunt) RAPUNZEL: Next, we'll lower you down through the walls to the vault level, so you can pick the lock.
Flip to see who goes first? I call heads! - Sorry, buddy.
- (Lance grumbles) (clattering) (squeak) Better luck next time.
(chuckles) (cranking) Picking it up with your mouth - was an odd choice, but thank you? - Hey! That's a double-headed coin! You cheated Lance again, Eugene.
Oh, come on! He's fine.
In fact, he's the one who gave me this coin.
- (gasp) Wait a second.
- (cranking) How did you know my real name is Eugene? Uh, I-I didn't say Eugene.
I said, "You're mean.
" Pfft, that's so not true, Burnsie.
- (smashes) - (Lance grunts) (distant neighing) (whinnying) Come on! Dive for it! (snort) (grunting, groaning) (grunt) Sorry.
We had to make a quick exit.
(DEEP VOICE): Hey, I think you guys crashed into me and stabilized my voice! I sound incredible! Well, in that case, you're welcome.
- (lock clicks) - Voilà! Beauty and brawn, am I right? I don't get how either of those things - helped you crack the lock.
- Just get in there.
LANCE: Whoa.
Would you look at all this stuff! EUGENE (laughs): Where do we start?! Oh no, it's not here! Hey, what is that? Oh, that's nothing.
There's nothing here but the kingdom's priceless treasures.
BOTH: We'll take it! (squeaking) Yes, yes! You found it! (whinnying) You know, I am really starting to hate that horse.
(sniffing) (neighs) Whoa! That was close.
I think we're safe.
(banging) Uh-huh, sure.
But, one tiny thing.
We're trapped in here now! Um, so I guess we just move in.
It's not that bad.
- (bang) - It's got some nice archways, exposed brick - (bang) - (rummaging) - RAPUNZEL: Guys, get down here.
- What in the what? Again with the secret castle stuff?! Uh, let's just say I'm a history buff? Now, come on, and don't touch anything.
(growl) What is this place? No time for questions, boys, just keep it moving.
(panting) I think we lost him.
Uh, you thought wrong.
Hurry, this way! (panting) (shrieks) Abandoned spiderwebs! Oh no.
My voice crack is back! Why is everything awful?! This path feels familiar That silver brick springs a trap, so watch your step.
You don't have to worry about me! I'm light on my feet! In fact, they call me the Sweet Feet Cham (crash) W-w-wait, Flynn! I'm stuck! Help! Help, help! - (grunting) - (neighing) Sorry, Lance.
You know the rule, buddy.
Every man for himself.
Eugene! Wait! How'd you little boil-brained barnacles know how to get down here? And secondly, who do you think has a better face for a mustache, me or Stan? (handcuffs clink) (sigh) Stan.
- Lock him up.
- (gate slamming) - (bell rings) - (gate scraping) (sigh) Oh, that was close.
I am so winded.
Sideburns really needs to step up the cardio.
Wait a minute, where's Lance? Uh, he, uh, sorta got a little bit arrested.
B-but, hey! He knows the deal.
Every man for himself.
That's just how it goes.
So, let's split up the loot, and, uh, - get outta here - Eugene Fitzherbert! How could you? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Enough with the real names, Sideburns! Just listen to me.
I know you better than you think I do.
You say it's easier to walk away with the excuse, "Every man for himself," but Lance? Lance is not just every man.
He is a friend.
He is your best friend.
And friends don't leave friends behind.
Wow, Burnsie, that was remarkably insightful, and so not like you.
Take this to the woods and guard it with your life.
- I'll be back soon.
- (squeak) I've got a friend to save.
(squeaking) (growl) (sighs) Uh, what are you in for? Oh, I didn't get arrested.
I just like the food here.
Five star gruel.
(rattling) LANCE: Sideburns?! What are you doing here? What does it look like I'm doing? Unfortunately, I don't know how to pick a lock.
Step aside, Burnsie.
Let a real thief handle that.
Flynn! You came back for me? Uh, I guess I've got a new rule.
Friends don't leave friends behind.
W-w-wait a minute! Raise that eyebrow again.
N-now, pucker those lips.
Little more.
More Oops, okay th-that's the duck face Okay, no, right, there you go! That, Flynn Rider, is your "blaze!" Wow, you're right! It's exquisite.
Although, I think I'm gonna call it, "The Smolder.
" - It's got a nice ring.
- (whinnying) (sigh) Not again.
STAN: What is it, Max? What's wrong? Uh, Flynn! Can you unlock me? Oh! Yeah.
Sorry about that, buddy.
Shorty, you coming? - And leave all this? - RAPUNZEL: Guys? Come on, we gotta go! - (sniffing, neigh) - Shorty, what did we tell you about sneaking into prison? Sneak? How dare you.
I just walked right in.
(whinnies) (neigh) - You first, bud.
- No, you first.
- I insist.
- No, I insist.
You go ahead.
I simply couldn't.
You go Both of you get down here right now, before I knock you into the middle of next week! Ah! Now, there's the Sideburns I know.
- (conk) - Ow! Get in there.
- (neigh) - Huh? (screaming) (thud) (clang) (smash, snorting) (neighing) - (conk) - Ow! Who lowered that? (panting) Halt in the name of the (sigh) PETE: You know, walking is just as exciting.
(snort) At last! Sweet, sweet freedom! The air smells so fresh! Oh, the trees are so green! Lance, you were in jail for 12 minutes! (squeaking) (magic humming) Alright, Patches, show us what we got! What the?! A junky sand clock? Look, I promise I'll explain everything to you in about 10 years.
I'm really happy I got to spend some time with you as a teenager.
Sideburns, what are you talking about? - No, no, no! - (smash) (whooshing) Great.
You dropped it, Burnsie.
If that thing had any sort of value, we could've used it to pay the Baron back.
Drop what? Where are we? We were just running away from the guards.
How did we get here? Don't worry, Flynn.
We'll figure out how to deal with the Baron.
We always do.
That's true, buddy.
Everything's a little easier with a friend by your side.
Ain't that right, Burnsie? Get your hands off me.
(grunt) Yeesh, this guy's dealing with some major mood swings today.
Pfft.
Teenagers.
(whinny) This horse is getting to be a pain in my side.
(neighs) RAPUNZEL: Oh, Pascal! Doesn't it feel wonderful to be back in our own skins again? And look at you! You're back to your adorable self.
- (neigh) - Max! You are looking so grown up today! (neigh) Eugene? What are you doing? I'm bring the last of Cass' things from the vault.
But, I thought you said I should leave Cassandra in the past.
(laugh) Very funny.
Oh wait, you're serious.
Sunshine, did you forget? I'm the one who told you Crowley was trying to toss all of Cass' stuff.
You did? (squeak) Yes! I mean, look, as much as I dislike Cassandra's taste ah you gotta put friends first.
Especially if it's a friend like Cassandra.
Really? It's like I always say, friends don't leave friends behind.
Oh-oh, oh-oh Now I got my eyes open and wide My heart burnin' like fire Feels like I'm so alive I'm never going back Whatever I want now, I'm gonna chase Who I am I can't contain it I'm not gonna hold it in 'Cause there's more of me to give Oh yeah, there's more of me to give