Workin' Moms (2017) s03e05 Episode Script

1 Previously on Workin' Moms Kate Foster is a woman for men's right.
(Applause) The last thing I need is a therapist who's still going through her own trauma.
My trauma is an asset to you.
I don't know the right things to say to get What? To get them to have sex with you.
- You're just like the rest of them.
- Them? You don't know if she's potty trained? I don't really see her that much.
I mean - He sounds controlling.
- He has rage issues.
Rage issues? Oh my God! I didn't know you were in journalism.
Oh I'm not, I'm actually in PR.
I shot a rhinoceros.
(Applause) Thank you.
How do I get out of this thing? You just gotta really bend hard at the knee until you feel a ligament tear.
There you go.
I don't think that's that can't be right.
- (Snap) Ah! - There ya go.
- That's cool.
- You got it.
Teacher is really mean.
I know.
I love when she shames me.
- Dude, you're sexually broken.
- 100% Oh hey.
- Jenny? - Anne.
Kate.
- How are you? - Amazing.
- Really, really dry.
- Great.
Like a 100%.
Yeah.
Well, I'm glad I ran into you.
Zoe's big birthday bash is coming up.
And I know we haven't talked in a while, but I would love if you and your kids could make it.
I mean, we would love to.
When is it? - Tomorrow at 11:00 A.
M.
- Tomorrow.
11:00 A.
M.
? Jenny I have work.
Yeah, no.
Charlie's got school.
No.
Yeah, Frankie used that excuse too.
Just feels like-kinda like a last minute invite.
Look I thought I'd ask.
- That's what nice people do.
- Totally.
It is very nice.
If you don't think about it for very long.
Good morning.
How is my little commuter? I'm thinking of transferring at St.
George instead of Yonge station today.
Hey, you take the exact route that we showed you! You rode the subway once, you're not in west side story.
And get off your phone.
Your battery is gonna die.
Be careful! So, how do I look? Anne? Hello? - What? Hmm? - How do I look? It's first day, new promo'sh.
Oh yeah.
Uh, maybe take the tags off? Yeah, I knew that was there.
I just okay.
All right.
Better? Anne? You're not the only one with things going on, you know? No, I know.
I know.
I'm sorry.
Can I um, take you out for lunch today? We can talk about your new job? I would love that.
Bye, Charlie.
Bye, Honey.
(Knock) Hi.
I have to talk you about Charlie.
Oh no is everything is everything okay? Ah, no actually.
Charlie keeps calling River a girl - because he has long hair.
- Oh, thank God.
- Excuse me? - He's 3-years-old, I wouldn't put too much stock into someone who still craps his pants, you know.
I guess I see where Charlie gets it.
Oh, come on, man.
River does sort of have a girl's haircut.
A beautiful girl, like I'd kill for those curls and volume.
I guess I shouldn't be surprised that a woman who represents a rhino killer would use such normative language.
Seriously.
All right.
Well, I guess, I could explain to my 3-year-old the grief caused by toddlers misgendering each other - Okay.
- You know? Or you know or, you could bite the bullet and take that sweet girl of yours to a Topcuts.
- (Offended gasp) - Just sayin'.
Wow.
(Tires screech) Where in hell? (Groans) No.
No-no-no.
Ugh.
Has anyone seen the artwork for the Stenton pitch? I guess you didn't read my D.
M.
Stop DM'ing me, Forrest.
Call.
Always call.
Or email.
Rosie quit before she finished the art.
Ughhhhhhh Kate, I know you're hurting, but I'm not giving up on you.
I'm not giving up on us.
I can help.
Without the artwork there's nothing we can do.
No, it just needs a quick polish, I'm great at photoshop.
I can do this.
No Forrest, just cancel the pitch, okay? Look, I was at the meeting.
I heard what they wanted.
I saw you shine.
Your breasts they were - Don't.
- Were engorged.
Okay.
(Sighs) Fine.
You can do the artwork, - but I need to see it first.
- Not if I see you first.
- I don't know what that me - Oh, there is-oh what, what? No, no, no.
Go, go, go.
- Okay.
No.
I get it.
- Yeah-yeah-yeah.
- You know what I mean.
- No means no.
Yeah.
- Work place.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
It's cool.
- Just at work.
Just chillin'.
- Okay.
(Laughter, music plays) It's kinda his naptime, so I'm just gonna let him sleep it out.
Well, his loss! Hey, thank you so much for letting me - host Zoe's party at your place.
- This is my pleasure.
This is my first proper kids' party.
Um, are they all catered? Or Jenny: Well, the good ones are more about the adults so Oh ooh - Girls: Cheers.
- What?! - Girls: What? - No! No! No-no-no.
Um, can I help you? Hey Jenny.
It's me.
Oh my God.
Ian, why are you dressed like that? It's Constable Crumbs! Zoe's favourite cartoon character.
Okay, is that a cake? - Hell yeah, it is! - I already have a cake.
It's a torte.
Yeah, I know.
That's why I thought a cake because I thought the kids would like it better than a torte.
Are you trying to ruin my party? Your party? Jenny, this is Zoe's birthday.
Where is all her friends? She looks so bored.
Don't be basic, Ian.
I am not basic! Okay.
Well, if you want Zoe to have a good birthday, change your clothes, have a cocktail, and just stay out of the way.
Ugh.
He's an idiot! Zoe! (Deep inhale, exhale) (Approaching footsteps thud) Shit! Hey guys! You're early! You wanna move this party to the conference room? Steve: Kate, we need to talk about this artwork.
I am so sorry It's beautiful.
I am so sorry it took so long.
It's just so, so inspiring.
I'm standing up for the little people.
Oh God, you know what? I'm doing it, Burt! What? No, Steve! Steve! No! Steve, you're not You're too fragile.
- Come on.
Come on.
- Get out of here.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Okay, so you hired me to protect your image, and while this is a good start - Exactly.
- You're right, Burt.
Take out all those other people.
Ground it.
Well, uh for your reputation, we might just wanna explore some variations.
You know, do a focus group, let some fresh eyes validate your instinct.
Oh, I like your work ethic, Kate, but you know what? There is no need to validate a slam dunk.
Well Do you have anything more to add? Nope.
Nothing.
Okay.
You know what? The world is gonna know that Kate Foster - stands up for men.
- Hope not! (Laughing) Jesus "hope not", - that was hilarious! - Steve? Steve? The meeting's not over.
Steve? Ugh! Great work, Kate.
Goddamit.
Well, he might have been part of it, he didn't know what he was doing.
- (Laughing) - I'm sorry.
- Hey Jenny.
- Yeah.
What do you say we do the cake? Ah, maybe in like an hour? An hour? (Laughs) A kid's party usually lasts an hour in total.
Girls, do you wanna help me.
Come here, Zoe, girl.
Thank you.
So this is none of my business, but can you go easy on her? 'Cause I know like you guys are having like issues, - and what not.
- Issues? Yeah, that you're not crazy about her seeing Zoe, but I think it's important that Jenny gets to see her.
What? She's the one who didn't wanna spend time with Zoe.
Really? 'Cause she's the one who said, - you're keeping them apart.
- Why would I do that? I don't know, 'cause you have like rage issues or something? Did she say that I have rage issues?! Yeah, and seriously, Ian, you should get some help.
Jenny: It is cake time! Jenny I gotta talk to you like right now.
I don't know what's happening today.
I've got Gena saying Are you even listening to me? Ian this isn't about you It's about Zoe.
- So just relax.
- How am I supposed to relax if you're taking shit behind my back.
Dude, you are way out of line.
- Ian, if you don't calm down! - I am fucking calm.
Jenny: Zoe no! (Splash) Oh my God! OMG! Jenny you're a hero! - I am? - Yeah.
- (Zoe coughs) - I am! Yeah, come here.
Yeah.
Come.
Come.
Let get you a towel.
Oh my goodness.
I'm a hero.
(Laughs) I must look awful though.
I'm dying for a chicken salad.
- Mom, it's a vegan cafe.
- Oh, don't be silly I'm sure they have a chicken in the back.
Nope.
Oh hey, Wendy.
Hi, I hope you don't mind my, my family is crashing our meeting.
- This is my mother.
- Hello.
Is everything here made of beans? Yes.
Look, there's not gonna be a meeting.
- Oh.
- Yeah, I'm sorry.
I talk to Linda about it.
And we're just gonna go in a different direction.
But let me know when you're ready to order.
Oh no hey, is this about pricing, because I'm going to give you a deal, okay? (Small laugh) You know what? When we came to see you, you kind of presented yourself as this progressive business woman.
And that's why we decided to go with you.
But ultimately you're just not that.
Look, we're just not morally compatible.
Excuse me, I can't have beans.
I have a boyfriend.
- Okay.
- Mom, stop it? Hey, level with me, okay? What's going on? - Is there something I did? - Look we read the article, and honestly I don't know what's worst, the fact that you're representing a rhino killer, or that you're a men's rights activist.
- Really? - I can explain.
But Did she say article? (Appalled gasp) That bitch! I'm gonna shave that kid's head.
Who are these guys? - My only clients.
- So what's the big deal? You gave a speech to some wealthy men.
Wealthy men with some extreme ideas.
Oh, God, you can't say anything these days.
I don't wanna be known as the woman behind the men's rights.
Well, then why did you let them make a movie about it? I didn't! I was trying to drum up business to support my family, and this woman spun it so I look like Ann Coulter.
Oh no, Katie.
That is not true.
Thank you! Ann Coulter has much better bone structure than you.
Right.
You know what? Just watch Ella, okay? I'm gonna go set the record straight.
Hey, Anderson Cooper! Nice a sucker punch today.
Look you got a problem with me that's one thing, but you do not mess with my work.
You're the one cheering on the men of one direction.
Cheering? I am literally rinsing them for all they're worth.
What could be more feminist than that? Femin I can't understand how any woman - could support their cause.
- You're aligning me with a group of misguided old misogynists.
- We're on the same side here.
- I'm aligning you? You're the one who's aligned yourself with those men.
No! I'm-I'm adjacent.
I'm next to them.
- You're aligning-adjacent.
- I am a good person.
I am a hard worker, and I am a great mother.
Excuse me, Mrs.
Foster? There's been a cutting incident.
- (Shocked gasp) - I left Charlie in aftercare as he cut some of Rivers hair with - (Gasps) Oh my God! - Okay.
Oh my God! - He butchered River! - Look he wanted a haircut.
You wouldn't give it to him.
He went to Charlie.
It's resourceful.
I'm gonna need you to fill in this incident report.
Hey, keep Charlie away from my son.
Come, Honey.
A moment of your time, Mrs.
Foster? Come on, Honey.
We can work with that.
Kate, our school helps with socialization, but a child's emotional education must begin at home So I'm prescribing "Panda's So Mad".
I want you to read it to him everyday.
And just try to get him to self-investigate his feelings.
- Can you do that? - I can try.
Can't wait to find out why this Panda is so mad.
Let's go.
Get you over here.
- (Phone buzzes) - Ooh.
Who is that? - For Godsake.
- (Click) - Kate Foster.
- Kate.
It's Steve Malk.
I read the article.
What a witch hunt.
You know, you can't even fight for equality these days without getting your goddam balls lopped off.
Well, that's not really what I'm fighting for.
Listen to me, you're on the right side of this.
- You understand.
- Yeah, Steve, listen I think I might have gotten myself into something that maybe I haven't really thought through, yet.
And I think if (Hang up beeps) Steve? Did you hang up? Hello.
Goddammit.
Anne: So I think I owe you an apology.
Last time you were here I know, I-I stormed out.
Um, I'm sorry I just I have some trust issues.
You can tell me anything.
(Deep breath) My roommate and a couple of his friends, got drunk last night and pissed on my bed.
How are you feeling today, Meredith? Honestly, really shitty.
My friend took me to this house party the other night.
This guy made me a drink.
He wasn't my type.
He was nice enough and I didn't wanna be rude.
I woke up in his bed.
My roommate says I probably got roofied.
Did you call the police? They can't do anything until he does something.
- (Frustrated exhale) - He found out where I live.
I think he's stalking me.
But I can't prove it and no one believes me.
In my senior year I had to switch schools like half way through because a couple guys, they ah, kicked the shit out of me.
Sometimes I think that's his plan.
- Get inside my head.
- (Knuckles crack) - Push my buttons.
- I didn't throw up.
I mean, you throw up if you get roofied, right? They're like why are you such a fucking pervert.
Like some sort of sick poppet master.
I mean, his smell was all over me.
They can't do that to me again.
I just keep thinking about having revenge.
How to humiliate him.
Does that make sense? Becky, we're gonna have to cut this short.
- For today okay? - We still have half an hour.
(Door slams) Iris, could you cancel my appointments - for the rest of the day please? - Are you okay? Yeah, I'm fine I just have a meeting across town, (Worn out exhale) Going for a bold colour this time.
Mhmm.
- You're a psychiatrist, right? - Mhmm.
- That must be exhausting.
- You have no idea.
No, I get it, in this job people are always unloading their stuff on me too.
Like the other day this guy comes in wants a mani, says it's what his wife prefers.
Then he's going on about how they haven't slept together in a year.
And then he starts flirting with me.
Crossing a line.
Like it's not making me feel good.
I know I look cheap and easy, but I'm really not.
- I gotta go.
- We're not done.
It's okay.
I got you.
Here you go.
Okay.
(Train rumbles) Man: (Knock on door) Just a minute.
I'm almost done my tutorial.
Okay, surprise, gorgeous, we're almost done here.
We just need a couple more seconds before the finishing touch Shit.
(Doors chime closed) (Traffic whooshes, car honks) (Siren wails in the distance) (Car engine rumbles loudly) Man: Hey, don't I know you.
(Revs engine) Oh, you're ignoring me.
That's good.
That's what you should do, but but it's kinda a rough neighbourhood.
Why don't you let me give you a ride.
Come on.
(Door creaks open) Hop in.
(Reading) "Panda's so mad.
He's mad at Chad.
" I know.
"Because Chad hurt Panda, bad.
But Panda doesn't tell Chad, because he's a scaredy cad.
" I know, buddy, just a couple more pages.
"He's afraid of losing Chad.
But being afraid isn't bad.
Talk to Chad.
Be honest.
Be yourself.
And you'll turn sad Panda, glad.
" I have a palates instructor named Chad.
- Hm? - He teaches topless.
You know what? I actually have to go take care of something.
Can you watch the kids for a few hours? All together? Both of them? What if the gang up on me? Charlie bullies me.
- What? - He does.
He's never bullied you.
And you know what? It's time for both of us to stop being scaredy cads.
Watch this.
I'm gonna go do my part - Kate.
- You do yours.
You're gonna be fine.
9-1-1.
(Door slams) (Regretful exhale) (Door opens and slams) (Lionel hums) Anne? What the hell? Where have you been? Did you forget about our lunch today? Shit, I, I totally forgot.
I'm so sorry.
What did you get half of your nails done? Yes.
I wish you told me you were gonna take the day off! Where's Alice? She's not home yet.
What? She should be home by now.
Did she text you? No, no.
she's got rehearsal tonight.
Not tonight she doesn't.
Oh my God.
I will call the school.
I'm gonna go look for her.
(Loud engine rumbles up) (Shuts engine off) Wait what? What the hell?! Who are you? - Hey! Hey! Who are you?! - Mom, I'm okay! - Wait! Wait! - (Pained grunts) Whoa! Did you touch her?! I'm Brenna's dad! - I'm Brenna's dad! - Hi.
Hi.
(Door slams) She was lost so I offered her a ride home.
Jesus.
(Starts engine) I'm so sorry.
(Deep rumbling) For the record you're a psycho! Go to your sister please.
(Low hum of party laughter and chatter) Oh.
Sorry.
Steve.
- What? - Hey.
Oh, there she is.
There's my girl! Hey, I need to talk to you.
Kate, you remember Nick Peterson? Of course, we're practically family.
You know what, Kate.
I wanna introduce you to Mike Bolinski.
Mike! Kate this is Mike Bolinski, - he's mood's crisis PR man.
- Ah.
Yes, hello.
Can I steal five minutes of your time Don't get threatened, Kate.
We value you for different reasons.
Mike here, can get a boat out of a bottle, if you know what I mean.
But in times like these, it's just good to have a woman in your corner.
About that Don't you have a toast to make? Indeed I do.
Mr.
Peterson to the bar! Aha! I'll follow you.
- Watch out.
Whoa! - It's just So I read your article.
Yeah, you and most of the city.
Mhm.
Let me guess, you wanna quit? - Well - No.
I get it.
It's your first bad press.
And you're spooked.
Here.
Try that on for size.
That'll help.
You don't find it hard to work for people whose views you find reprehensible? I'm just a hired gun.
Yeah.
Well, I'm one mad panda.
You're what? It's not just that working for these guys is costing me other clients.
- Who did you lose? - A cafe, Vegan and Sara.
- (Small chuckle) - Come on.
I'm sorry.
Let me ask you a question.
Who makes you more money: the vegans or Nick Peterson and Steve Malk? Well, you know, the mood dudes.
Yeah.
Well, there you go.
Yeah, but everyone thinks I'm a monster.
In 48 hours.
You take on a charity, right? Baby duck company, women's shelter, anything.
Then you go from Kate Foster, the woman of mood.
To Kate Foster: the woman's rights activist.
- Mike, is it? - Mhmm.
Yeah.
I know how to do my job.
So I've heard.
All right, well, looks like all I have to do for the next two days is find some pro-bono work then.
Mhmm.
And you have that dinner.
- What dinner? - The one with me.
Steve: Anyway.
Let's gather everyone around.
Nick: Simmer down, everybody! Hey, everybody! Steve wants to make a toast.
I do indeed.
I wanna make a toast to mood and the woman behind us Kate Foster.
The times they are finally changing.
- Cheers everyone! - All: Cheers! (Glasses clink) Steve: Enjoy yourselves, everyone.