Amphibia (2019) s03e06 Episode Script

1
[theme song playing]
[frogs croaking]
[frogs croaking]
Do you know why they call me Mr. X, Jenny?
Right you are, Jenny.
Because I deal specifically
with extraterrestrials.
And rumor has it
that there are a few in the area.
Hit it, Jenners.
Very good, Jenny. Very nice.
This is why you're the best.
Oh, Jenny, honey, are you blushing?
But who is this, I wonder?
Little Miss String Bean.
[monitor beeping]
Uh-huh. Sounds like
some real '80s movie junk.
But one thing's for sure.
These aliens are being sheltered.
And whoever is harboring these little
monsters will be in big trouble--
[knocking]
[tune playing]
One Popsicle, please?
Sorry, little man. This was the last one.
[slurps] Mmm.
Uh, give me a sec.
[strains, groans]
[slurps]
Now, we've got to get these aliens
before someone gets abducted or worse.
[stomach growling]
Okay, we need some real food.
Jenny, Jenny, you've done it again.
Is it just me, or is anyone feeling
amped up since we fought the robot?
Kick that robot butt, you mean.
Remember I was all, "Whapow"!
And you were like… [mimics karate yell]
Sounds like you got a case
of post-battle euphoria.
Nothing like a brush with death
to make you feel alive.
So, what's next? I'm ready to fight.
Hopefully, nothing.
Unless Andrias sends another robot,
we're safe for now.
So I'm taking the Plantars
to their first movie.
Well, if anything comes up, we're ready.
I even broke out an old pull-up bar. Look.
[grunting]
-Ah, my back! [groans]
-Honey, be careful.
Guys, please.
Leave the danger to us, okay?
Now movie time.
[all whooping]
[all gasp]
[chattering]
[screaming]
Hello, sensory overload!
Whoa! What is this, a church?
Yeah, pretty much. [sighs]
-What's the matter?
-Just thinking about my folks.
I don't like the idea of putting
those two in harm's way.
I know we took down that robot together,
but they're still just parents, you know?
They shop for groceries
and coach Little League T-ball.
Well, luckily today is a stress-free day
with no danger or conflict.
Hello. Welcome to Thai Go.
[in Thai]
[in Thai]
I was stationed in Phuket for a bit.
We'll take one Pad see ew.
And while we're at it,
have you seen any odd creatures
walking around?
Probably disguised as… humans?
[laughs] What strange shapes they are!
Haven't seen them. Who's asking?
Oh, just your friendly
neighborhood federal government.
Yes. Very nice. Hooray government!
[in Thai]
Geez, where's the fire? Hmm?
Gotta go! Is your stun gun charged, Jenny?
Tell me it's charged!
-Uh…
-We have to go now.
I'll explain on the way.
[tires screeching]
[ringing]
Come on, come on.
[vibrating]
[announcer] And now…
for what you've all been waiting for.
Another trailer!
[whooping]
Twenty minutes of trailers?
And you keep calling yourself civilized.
[roaring]
Anyone else feel like this audio video
experience is a little overwhelming?
Entertainment that makes your ears bleed?
I'm here for it, baby!
I have to admit,
it is pretty difficult to hear anything.
[dinosaur roaring]
[vibrating]
[horns honking]
She's not answering.
[groans]
We're gonna lose him in the traffic!
That's because you drive like an old man!
Move over!
[yelling]
[electronic music playing]
[tires screeching]
Man, this city, I tell ya!
[yells] Oh, no!
Well, it was no Suspicion Island.
[loudly] What did you say?
I thought the protagonist was pretty fun.
I liked that she was very flawed
and had room to grow.
Oh, crud.
Back inside, gang.
[Sprig] No, not another one!
[chuckles]
Guys, there's a secret agent after us!
We have to find a way out of this place
without him finding--
Tell me, are you folks from the area?
Or just visiting?
[all scream]
Oh, how I love a good chase.
-I think we lost him.
-Great. Don't stop.
Wait! Stop!
Huh?
I think I just won something.
[vibrating]
They're watching the exit.
We need to find another way out.
-We coming in to help.
-No!
I don't want you getting in trouble.
We can handle it.
Tell her we are adults
and we know what we're doing.
Anne, your mother says--
Hang on, I'm putting you on speaker.
Okay, let's see. How do we do this?
[in Thai]
-What?
-[Dad] Oops!
I think I accidentally--
[in Thai]
Oh, hi, Grandma.
Yeah, I just had a sandwich.
Mom, Dad, just stay in the car.
We're safe. We'll meet you outside.
Bye, Grandma. Love you.
[laser humming]
Ah, that tickles my brain.
How do we get them out? They're cornered.
I have an idea.
Not only how to get them out,
but to deal with these agents, too.
Quick! To the pet store!
[yells] Honey, take it easy!
Okay, okay. Get it together, Anne. Think.
What we're going to need to do first is--
Hmm?
Hide!
Well, this is getting fun.
Oh, good. It's a dead end.
Ah! Classic. Everyone, hide.
Now, what could this be?
-What the--
-Now, guys!
-Oh, no, you don't!
-[yells]
[grunts]
[grunts]
[gasps] What even are you?
And why are yo so slimy? Ugh!
Rude!
[grunts]
-Ow!
-[laughs]
[doorknob rattles]
[hissing]
-[beep]
-Jenny, you're not gonna believe this.
They're big, beautiful,
talking frog monsters!
Call in the troops.
[Anne groans]
Why are these doors so high up?
[Polly yells]
Your big toe is in my eyeball!
-[Sprig] Watch it! My hand!
-[Polly] Get off of my--
-[Hop Pop] Stay quiet.
-[toilet flushing]
[phone vibrates]
-[sighs]
-[beep]
[Dad] Okay, so your mother and I
have a plan to get you out.
-It's really good too!
-Guys, no!
Seriously, we got this. It's four on one.
When he comes in, we'll rush him and run.
See you soon.
Man, this city, I tell ya.
-No, no, no, no, no. Anne. Anne!
-[call disconnects]
[sirens wailing]
[tires screech]
In the bathroom. You ready, honey?
Born ready.
[power tools whir]
They're in there. Come on, everyone.
Show time!
Let's grab ourselves some frog aliens.
Okay, guys. On three, go for the eyes.
One, two…
-[lights clank]
-[SWAT] What's going on?
-[SWAT 2] Power's off!
-[SWAT 3] On your toes!
-[whirring]
-[SWAT 4] They're getting away!
-[punches landing]
-[SWAT] Ow! Watch where you're stepping!
[croaking]
[stifles laugh]
-[all laughing]
-Nice frog alien, sir.
Uh, I've heard of little green men,
but this is ridiculous.
Looks like our little friends
are smarter than I thought.
We're gonna have fun with this one, Jenny.
And we'll have the last laugh!
I don't believe it.
Dad, Mom, how did you--
Well,
parents have a special set of skills.
[Dad]
First, your mother bought us some time…
-[tires screech]
-[thud]
[thrilling music playing]
[meows]
Wow.
[Mom] While your father got the frogs
at a pet store down the street.
[Dad] The owner was your T-ball coach,
Mr. Tran. Remember him? Nice guy.
[Mom] And remember that one time
we tried to fix the electricity?
[Anne] Yeah. Wasn't that a disaster?
[Dad]
Yep. So we knew exactly what not to do.
[electricity crackles]
[sirens wail]
-Whoa!
-Amazing!
-Jealous!
-What is T-ball, anyway?
You guys seriously did all that?
I can't believe it. I guess I… I…
[distorted voice] misjudged you.
-That's okay, sweetie.
-We forgive you.
[normal voice] Wait. But how did you know
which bathroom we were hiding in?
-Uh…
-Parental intuition?
And maybe the tracking device
we put on Hop Pop when he was sleeping.
-I was wondering what that was.
-[beeping]
What?
-Hi-yah!
-[tape rips]
[screams]
[frogs croaking]
Hmm.
I give Dante's Inferno a B-plus for story
and an F-minus for helping us get home.
How's it goin' on your end… Sprig?
Pretty good.
I think I'm really gettin' somewhere.
It's a giraffe.
Okay. I can see we need a break.
Finger football?
You know it.
[whistle blows]
-[crowd cheering]
-Score!
[Anne and Sprig laugh]
Hey. What's gotten into you two?
Oh, nothing. We're just looking for
a place to put this mud crown!
Hey!
-[angelic choir sings]
-[mud squishing]
What is that? What's going on?
Well, in Amphibia, it's customary
to put a mud crown on somebody's head
-when it's their birthday!
-[triumphant chord plays]
What?
[both] Froggy little birthday here ♪
It's crystal clear
You were born this hoppy time of year ♪
[both] Mwah!
Aw, thanks, guys. You shouldn't have.
Sprig, I had no idea it was your birthday!
Eh, don't worry about it.
I don't think I ever mentioned it.
But I'm your friend!
I'm supposed to know these things!
Well, we're not doing
any more research today.
We're doing whatever folksy
frog traditions you do. Whaddya got?
Well, the mud crown represents
every frog's humble beginning as an egg
in the muddy waters of the swamp.
And all that's left
is for the birthday frog
to wear his crown and reflect.
-Reflect?
-On his life until this point.
[whispers] Shh! It's starting!
-[peaceful music playing]
-[wind whistling]
[music building]
-[music stops]
-Okay. All done.
Welp, that's that. Hoppy birthday, kiddo.
Pretty quick this year.
[Polly] I wonder which of our eight
streaming services we should watch.
-[Sprig] Wait for me, guys!
-Wait. Hold on.
That's all you frogs do
for your honkin' birthdays?
Yes. This is starting to feel
a little culturally insensitive.
Unacceptable.
Birthdays should be fun and memorable!
Especially when you're turning, uh…
Um…
Uh…
-Eleven.
-Eleven!
And I knew that because I'm your friend.
And this friend's about to give you…
[voice distorted] the best birthday you've
ever had in your life! Capisce?
Well, I'm intrigued. A little scared,
but intrigued. Let's do it.
Now, now, my little impatiens.
Don't be impatient.
[clank]
[Anne] Sorry, Dad! Love you, Dad!
[cheerful music playing]
I can't believe Hop Pop and Polly
didn't want to share this basket with me.
I feel perfectly sa--
[groaning]
Listen up. Earth birthdays
are about fun, presents, cake.
It's basically a day that means you tell
people what to do and get what you want.
Wow. In Amphibia, it's all about
respecting those around you
and being grateful
for the time you have left alive.
-Man, talk about brainwashing.
-Are you talking about me or you?
Earth birthday montage engage!
[upbeat pop music playing]
[laughs]
Whoa! [grunts]
What the heck?
-[woman] Whoo!
-[Sprig screaming]
[camera shutter clicks]
[both laugh]
[Mariachi music playing]
Feliz cumpleaños, Sprig ♪
-[gasps]
-Feliz cumpleaños, Sprig ♪
-[burps]
-[fire whooshes]
[playing heavy metal music]
[upbeat rock music playing]
[both] Meh.
Whew! Man, that place had everything--
big telescopes, crazy contraptions.
-And I made a new friend.
-Oh, he wasn't a friend.
That was security yelling at you
to get off the telescope.
[scoffs] Anne, on your Earth birthday,
everyone is your friend.
Now you're gettin' it.
-Happy birthday, kid!
-[man 2] Cute balloons!
Happy b-day, dude!
It's actually my birthday too.
[sighs] Wow. That was fun.
Thanks for an incredible birthday, Anne.
You know, at first, I couldn't understand
why you'd make birthdays so special.
And now I get it! Today was amazing.
So, was it the best birthday
you've ever had?
Oh! Definitely top three.
-[brakes screech]
-[grunts]
What? That's it?
I pull out all the stops, and I'm still
third place to a couple of mud crowns?
-Well…
-This will not stand!
It is my duty as your friend
to keep this party going
until it's in the number one spot!
But haven't we done everything
by this point?
Not everything.
[midtempo country music playing]
Thanks, Dad. Be back soon.
No worries. I'll just be over here,
reading great American literature.
[chuckles] Simply brilliant.
[exciting music playing]
Whoa! We get to ride in one of these?
Welcome, my friend, to paradiso.
I'm gonna get a bird's-eye view
of another world
in a flying machine
that's powered by fire?
Whoo-hoo!
-Yes!
-[Sprig screams]
Sprig, what is it? What's wrong?
-What the frog?
-[screech]
[scary chords playing]
Aw, don't be startled, child.
This balloon only looks scary
because it was repurposed
from a horror movie promotional piece.
[blows raspberry]
What? How could you think
that was a good idea?
Well, we weren't about to waste
a perfectly good clown balloon.
Anyways, the name's Blair the balloonist.
I take it you're…
-[horn honks]
-…here for the birthday package?
-Yep.
-I'm 11 now.
-Well, hop aboard, explorers.
-[slide whistle plays]
-Couple of quick safety rules before we--
-[phone beeps, vibrates]
-[beep]
-Oopsy. High wind alert.
Sorry, guys,
but it's too risky to fly just now.
-But it's his birthday!
-[whimpers]
You make a strong argument, but no can do.
[both sigh]
Can we at least sit in the basket
and imagine we're flying?
Yeah.
Heck, you don't even need me for that.
-Give me a holler when you've had enough.
-[shoes squeaking]
Wow! We get to use our imaginations? Neat!
Forget that!
-Buh-bam!
-[fire whooshes]
-Whoo!
-Go, go, go, go, go!
-Whoa! [laughs]
-Yeah! [laughs]
Whoa! Isn't this risky?
Relax. We're still tethered to the ground.
What's the worst that could happen?
Now come on. Let's seal the deal
and make this the best birthday ever!
-Yeah! Huh?
-Huh?
[both gasp] Whoa.
Wowza. Unforgettable.
-[wind gusting]
-[both screaming]
[rope stretching]
No, no, no, no, no, no!
[both] Oh, my frog!
[shoes squeaking]
Hmm?
[Sprig and Anne continue screaming]
[Sprig] We're gonna die!
Oh, I am definitely
getting fired for this.
-[honks]
-Honk, honk!
[screaming continues]
-We're gonna hit something!
-Ow! Not if I can help it.
I'll control the altitude.
You use your tongue to steer us.
-Got it! Huh?
-Huh?
[both scream]
[scary chord plays]
[both screams]
[fire whooshes]
[thrilling music playing]
-[both] Yes! Yes! We're amazing!
-[triumphant chord plays]
[horns honking]
-[screaming]
-Down, down. Gotta go down!
[balloon stretching]
-Whoa! Whoa!
-Whoa!
[Sprig] Whoa!
[Sprig grunts]
[grunts]
-[grunts]
-[man] What?
-[dog yelps]
-[man screams]
Wow! You're gettin' pretty good at that.
-Thanks.
-Huh?
[geese honking]
[both scream]
-Whoa!
-Don't open your mou--
Well, Doc, I think you've done it.
I think you've cured me
of my fear of direct eye contact!
[screaming]
-[romantic music playing]
-[engine whirring]
Hon, look behind you.
[music distorts, stops]
No, Tyler, I will not clown face you.
-[melancholy music playing]
-[sighs] I just don't know what to do.
Should I quit my office job to pursue
my passion of stand-up comedy?
Lord, send me a sign!
[scraping]
Hey, have you guys heard the one about
the lady who probably just made
a really bad decision?
-That was… a lot of geese.
-[coughs, groans]
[screams] Sprig, look!
-[scary chord plays]
-[zings]
[both scream]
-We can't move in time!
-We have to jump!
[both screaming]
[air hissing]
I didn't even get
to give you your present!
-You got me a present?
-Yeah, dude. It's your birthday.
-[both screaming]
-[thud]
Fifty hot dogs, please.
-Havin' a big party, eh?
-No. Why do you ask?
[ladder clanks]
Hey, that actually worked.
-[metal clicking]
-[both scream]
[Sprig groans]
[coughs] Whoa.
Now that was a horror show. Woof!
[sighs] Well, I ruined your birthday.
After all this time, I thought I'd be
a better friend than this.
What? How so?
Um, hello! I didn't even know
it was your birthday today.
I thought I could make it up to you
with the craziest day ever.
But it looks like I'm just a failure
through and through.
-Friend punch!
-[grunts]
Oh, wow.
It's been a while since that happened.
Anne, you're my best friend
because I love being with you,
not because you know what day I was born.
And this birthday isn't top three
because of the crazy stuff we did.
It's top three
because we got to spend it together.
[whines] Really?
That's, like,
the sweetest thing anyone's ever said.
Thanks, man.
Okay. I've gotta know.
What are your two top birthdays?
Well, birthday number one was the day
I was actually born and given life.
Oh. Well, that makes a lot of sense.
What about number two?
That was when my mom and dad
gave me this hat.
My memory of it is a little fuzzy.
But it's an iconic hat, right?
Yeah. It is iconic. Oh, yeah.
And here's the present I got you.
Yay!
Whoa! It's a telescope
with my name engraved on it.
Thanks, Anne.
You're welcome, dude.
Okay, let's go home because I don't wanna
look at that clown anymore.
-[scary choir sings]
-I see it whenever I close my eyes.
-[balloon stretching]
-Well, dude,
another day, another adventure resolved
with no loose ends.
-[horn honks]
-[Dad] Anne, come on!
When is this balloon ride
supposed to be over?
[thud]
[theme music playing]
[Anne laughs]
[scatting]
Whoo-hoo! Baby!
[scatting]
Oh! Ah! Baby!
[scatting]