Evil (2019) s03e06 Episode Script
The Demon of Algorithms
1
[CANDICE GROWLING]
[SCREAMING]
CANDICE: Fuck you!
KRISTEN: Candice? Candice, can you hear me?
CANDICE: I will kill you, bitch.
- I want to help you, Candice.
- [CANDICE GASPING]
But you do need to answer a few questions.
Fuck you! I don't need an exorcism.
KRISTEN: Well, that's good
- because I'm not an exorcist.
- [CANDICE GROANING]
I'm a psychologist.
And I'm here to see if you might
[SCREAMING]
KRISTEN: I'm here to see if you
have any symptoms of mental illness.
GAL: I don't understand.
Why can't you just do it? Look at her.
It's a process, Ms. Berganza.
We have to determine
if there's something else
that could have caused this.
Caused this? What else could cause this?
Candice, have you experimented
with any drugs?
Fuck you!
[SOBBING]
KRISTEN: I saw in your
chart that you were diagnosed
with ADHD when you were younger.
[DEVICE CLICKING]
Did you ever take any medication for that?
[CANDICE HYPERVENTILATING]
Candice, I'm gonna help you, okay?
This is going to be over soon.
But I need you to answer a few questions.
When you were younger,
did you ever take any medications?
- [GROWLING]
- [PHONE CHIMING]
I'm going to help you
♪
[LAUGHING]
KORECKI: What is that? VidTap?
Well, you know how TikTok
replaced Instagram?
Okay, so VidTap replaced TikTok.
God, I feel old.
BEN: So, this is Candice's VidTap stream.
[GROWLING]
She shot her own possession?
Yes.
Oh, my God.
KRISTEN: It gets worse.
[CRUNCHING]
[STAMMERS] Is that real?
BEN: We think so.
KRISTEN: She had stitches in
her mouth from the cuts, so
H-How long ago was that?
Two weeks.
And is she like that now?
A version of that.
Oh, okay.
I-I'll contact Father Amara.
W-We need to get going on this.
I'm not sure about that.
- What do you mean?
- Why is she recording all these?
Wh-Why does it matter?
Well, I just think it's weird.
Right? I mean, she's chewing glass,
she's out of control, but
she makes sure that the camera can see
the blood in her mouth.
While you figure out what that means,
I-I'll brief Amara on this.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
You think it was faked?
No, I think the, uh, blood is real.
I think the stitches are real.
I just don't understand.
She's got eight other videos
of her possession,
and each of them are perfectly
timed to the length of the app.
Hmm. You think her mom's recording them?
Maybe, but that's pretty sick.
Uh, oh, Kristen, there was one more thing.
The archdiocese did
an investigation of Mr. Townsend
visiting your daughter at school.
- Luxanne.
- Lexis.
You'll be pleased to know
that we found no impropriety there.
Leland was purely at the school
at the request of a teacher.
That's how he saw your daughter.
It was by accident, that's all.
- On four separate occasions?
- He was there at the request
of a teacher, Ms. Christine Rutherford.
And four times he asked my daughter
to lie about seeing him.
Well, actually,
the archdiocese found
no evidence of that lie.
Except from my daughter?
We've talked to all
the teachers at the school.
They swear that Leland
has been perfectly professional
in his approach to children.
But in an abundance of caution,
we've asked Leland to
no longer visit the school.
I'm sorry
- It likes it here.
- Okay, serious time.
We need to talk about Leland.
- Why?
- The archdiocese says
he's innocent and he can do
whatever he wants,
so we're gonna have to rely
on each other now, okay?
What's that mean?
We're going to talk about emergency plans.
These are cards that I made up.
They have all of our numbers,
police numbers, and emergency plans
for what to do when he approaches you
at home or at school.
I'm gonna put these in your backpacks
- with your school ID.
- Wow, Mom.
We are taking this seriously, okay?
All right. Go get ready for bed.
I'm gonna be working in my room.
[DOOR SHUTS]
- Wow, Mom doesn't seem good.
- LILA: I know.
We need to do something about Leland.
Well, we could kill him.
Poison him.
I'm actually on board with that
- at this point.
- LILA: That's not even funny.
We could ask Grandma.
[OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
- Guys. Guys.
- What?
He's still on Bumblebee Valley.
[WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
Hello, Lynda.
It's your old friend Pollie the Pig.
What are you doing?
[TYPING]
Hi, Pollie. I don't know. I'm kind of sad.
Well, tell Pollie why. Maybe I can help.
Tell him it's about Mom.
No, no, tell him you're angry at Mom.
No, you should say you took
his advice, but it didn't work.
LILA: Oh, yeah.
I tried that prank on my mom,
but she found the pills in her dinner.
Now I'm in trouble.
Did you crush the pills first?
It has to be a powder.
Then you can stir it in.
[LAUGHS] He's toast.
[CANDICE CRUNCHING]
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
[SOBBING]
[SCREAMING]
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
[SCREAMING]
[SCREAMING]
You guys seen the one with the bloody tears?
- Just now.
- Yeah, it's official.
Everyone on the Internet is possessed.
- DAVID: How many are there?
- KRISTEN: Thousands.
- I barely scratched the surface.
- Mm.
- [MAN GROWLING]
- It's addictive.
It's like eating potato chips.
[GROANS]
[SCREAMS]
[RASPY VOICE]: Satan is my name!
[ROARING]
- These aren't real, right?
- I think the reality
is that there's a mental health epidemic.
Not a possession epidemic.
But Candice was eating glass.
She had stitches.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
What?
I've heard that before
in other possession videos.
What?
That growl with the Latin.
Okay, this is a source function key.
It will find every video
that uses that sound.
Okay, so she copied it.
Oh, a lot of people copied it.
But let's see where they all copied it from.
There's the root of the tree.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
CANDICE: So?
That's where I got the Latin phrase
- to summon the devil.
- BEN: No.
That's where you got
the sound file to lip-synch to.
Mom.
Get them out of here.
I-I don't understand, Father.
- Are you saying none of this is real?
- DAVID: No.
Candice really ate glass.
But she's doing that
because she's influenced
by this magician,
The Great Heller.
He's a magician?
He was a magician.
Now he's using the same tricks
to become a social media influencer.
I'm gonna leave some of these for you.
This is what The Great Heller uses.
Sugar glass.
KRISTEN: He's a liar who's getting
other people on VidTap to copy him.
Ms. Berganza, your daughter
is not possessed.
However, she is in need
of some professional help.
♪
Okay, so this is my first VidTap video
and hopefully my last.
But I think that too many kids
are copying this guy:
The Great Heller.
Okay, he's a magician
and he's using his magic tricks
to make you guys think that he's possessed.
But he's not, okay?
This is him levitating.
And this is how he does it
in his magic show.
Oh, look at me.
I'm possessed. Look.
It only took me five minutes.
And this is how he eats glass.
[CRUNCHING]
Sugar glass.
These are fake blood capsules.
You just bite down on them
[CRUNCHING]
and there you go.
It's all fake.
Don't be an idiot. Okay?
Just don't hurt yourself.
Don't copy assholes like this magician
who are just using magic to
make you think they're possessed
so they can rack up likes.
♪
[COMPUTER CHIMING]
♪
[CHIMING INCREASES]
[PHONE CHIMES]
Oh, God.
[SIGHS]
Hey, moms. Want to know the perfect way
to pack your kid's lunch?
- No.
- The key is
Here's another mom hack
that changed my life.
Today, the perfect margarita.
Let's face it, for moms like us,
the best margarita is a fast margarita.
- Yeah.
- So
I use a canned one.
Then, an airplane-sized tequila.
Then, Cointreau.
And I pour Pop Rocks on a plate.
Moisten the rim of your glass
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
- Where there is injury
- [PHONE CHIMES]
♪
It's hard to be a priest.
You're alone most of the time.
But if you're a Black priest
it's doubly hard.
"And the Lord God said,
"'It is not good that man should be alone;
I will make him a helper.'"
[COMPUTER CHIMING]
@BenS, who made you
the expert on possessions?
What gives you the right to determine
if someone is really suffering
from a demonic posse?
Fuck you, BenS
Hey, BenS, why don't you get a life
and stop coming after teenage girls
on the Internet?
MAN: My son is possessed.
You don't believe me? You come over here
and clean up the fucking vomit.
I don't know if all these
other videos are fake, BenS,
but I have two kids, and they are terrified
of something coming
into their room at night.
I thought they were just making it up.
So I put a camera in their room.
[CLATTERING]
Oh, my gosh. Oh, no.
[CLATTERING]
Oh, my gosh.
MARIE: I don't know what to do.
But this is real.
And-and I need help.
♪
♪
♪
- [WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
- Hi, everyone.
I love Bumblebee Valley.
It's my favorite game.
But there is one big problem.
Pollie the Pig is a pedophile.
[SCOFFS]
Done.
GIRAFFE: It's true.
He won't stop bothering me either.
ELEPHANT: We looked into it
and found out Piggy567
isn't a 13-year-old girl.
He's a 60-year-old man.
Yuck.
When we found this out,
we started recording
every time he was inappropriate.
Is this your house, Lynda?
[DISTORTED]: Can I see inside?
I'm lonely, Lynda. Aren't you?
I'd rather be alone with you
than with all your friends.
Remember, this is a 60-year-old man.
Creepy. Creepy.
- What the fuck?
- BUNNY: I agree.
We don't want pedophiles on here.
We want real kids.
So listen up, Pollie the Pig. Go away.
COW: Does anyone know where his house is?
I think we should burn it down.
I think it's over here. Grab some firewood.
Oh, Lexis, Lexis.
I went on VidTap to see
if anyone was going through the same thing.
And that's when I found
your video on possessions.
Public service.
MARIE: Anyway, I-I thought you could
figure out what's going on in my house.
Did Ben tell you what we do, ma'am?
MARIE: You're with the Catholic Church.
- You look into hauntings.
- DAVID: Well,
demonic infestations.
We might not be able to help you,
but we probably could point you
in the direction of someone who could.
That's all I want.
I just want someone to take me seriously.
How are your kids doing, Marie?
MARIE: You saw the video?
They can't sleep. And I move them
from room to room,
but then it happens there too.
So we moved out here.
But it's gotten worse.
What do you mean, worse?
I think it's inside them.
This was last night.
Okay, what are we looking at here?
MARIE: I heard Mikey screaming,
so I got up and stopped it
before Bran could start the dryer.
- Sleepwalking?
- Maybe.
This is from two nights ago.
Is it possible that your kids
are playing a prank on you?
They wouldn't. A-And I don't see how.
Marie, do you mind if we speak to your kids?
Why did you put your brother
in the dryer, Brandon?
Um, I was hiding him.
Hiding him from what?
The-the thing that comes
into our room at night.
Okay.
And you're sure you're not
doing it to scare your mom?
You don't believe us.
No, we we're just trying to
find out why this is happening.
Oh, buddy.
So, the house has
a concrete slab foundation.
And the way that concrete
is finished and cures
makes a completely level slab impossible.
So, you think the floor's slanted
that's why the bed moved?
Scientific method.
Well, you solved one thing, anyway.
- No.
- Why not?
The bed rolled that way.
KRISTEN: Look, Marie,
I I can't tell you anything
without a fuller examination, but your kids
are terrified of this house, that's clear.
Do you have anywhere you could go?
I'm a single mom.
I inherited this house
from my parents. I have nowhere.
Well, I can check with the Church and see
if there are any options.
BEN: The time codes on all these videos
it reads around 2:00 a.m.
Is that when all these things happen?
I think so. Why?
Um, do you have any enemies?
I don't think so. What do you mean?
Well, there's a chance that these things
are pranks being pulled by
someone who wants to hurt you.
I mean, do you have any tenants?
No.
A school teacher a few
months ago, but she moved out.
Because she was scared?
Oh, I don't know. We didn't talk much.
DAVID: Okay.
Well, we would like to
come back later tonight,
if that's all right.
About 1:00 a.m.?
Okay.
That's how we investigate infestations.
If that's all right.
Yes, yeah.
I think Brandon and Mikey will feel safer
with other people here.
So, what are we thinking?
I have no frigging idea.
WOMAN: Who is this guy Ben
to tell us what is true and what isn't?
He doesn't control facts.
Watch, Ben.
Cotton candy.
Oh, my God.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Okay, I don't control truth,
but if your dryer
is hot enough to melt sugar,
you'd be basically lighting
your clothes on fire
every time you dried them, okay?
Come on, people, just use
Use your brains.
WOMAN: Yep,
I'm drinking again.
I thought my daughter was a good girl.
And then I cleaned her room,
and what do you think I found?
That's right.
My daughter is sleeping around.
So I read the best thing
you can do for your kids
is to give them rules.
So I put my house rules on a chalkboard.
Then I go to clean their rooms,
and guess what I found on the back.
They replaced my rules with their rules.
♪
MAN: I have dark thoughts.
I have thoughts of going on Tinder.
I watch online porn,
and all I think about is being with someone.
All I want to do is talk to someone.
DEMON KRISTEN: Talk to me.
[EXHALES]
No.
I told you it's over.
The sex was over.
Not the talking.
What's wrong with talking?
God, you're so transparent.
What do you mean?
I mean you're using my weakness against me.
There are things you'd love
to talk to Kristen about,
but you can't, right?
So talk to me.
- I won't bite.
- If there's something
I want to talk to Kristen about,
I'll talk to Kristen.
Well, then talk to her about the Entity.
See?
You can't.
You promised not to tell anyone.
But here I am.
You're worried the Entity
is using you, right?
I'm not worried.
I know they're using me.
That's the whole point.
Right, but
what do you owe God?
And what do you owe
these stupid little spies?
If it saves Grace
Ling, then it's worth it.
Oh, yeah. The prophet.
But he hasn't mentioned
Grace Ling in a long time, right?
How long has it been a month?
You say that you think
I'm using your weakness against you.
I think Victor
knew your weakness about Grace.
That you missed her.
And he's using that.
Using that for what?
Think something about
that Chinese man that died.
All those people in that room.
Why did they want you
to leave the door open?
- I don't care.
- But you do.
That's why you googled it.
Right?
But you couldn't find anything
about a man dying
- at the Hotel Percival, right?
- That means nothing.
It means you can't trust the Entity.
And I should trust you?
A demon.
David
I'm not just a demon.
I'm you.
I'm in here.
No.
You know what this is?
I never wanted you back
until I started watching
those VidTap videos.
They're leading me to temptation.
That's what this is.
[THUDDING]
David?
David?
[SQUELCHING]
David!
DAVID: Sister, what are you doing?
What are youdoing?
Letting that thing attach itself to you.
What are you talking about?
- That demon.
- Sister, I was just sleeping.
David, there was something attached to you.
What are you doing?
I'm going out to assess,
that's what I'm doing.
No, you let something into your life.
Sister, I have to go.
Please, don't come in my room
unless I ask you.
I don't know how anyone thought
I was a 60-year-old man.
As if.
I think I've been too nice here,
trying to make friends.
And some people want to hurt me.
This is my home. Look!
I am 14 years old.
I live in Sun Valley.
My mom is dead.
And now I have nowhere to live.
People should stop
being mean to me.
All I want to do is make friends.
- Oh, we need to shut this guy down.
- What are we doing?
- LAURA: Just watch.
- LILA: We're pissing him off.
LYNN: He's pissing us off.
- [OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
- Can we please
Just watch this.
Hey, friends.
We traced the IP address of Pollie the Pig
to a place called
St. Joseph's Parish.
- We think it's a church.
- ELEPHANT: And Pollie the Pig
is not a 14-year-old from Sun Valley.
He's a 60-year-old named Leland Townsend.
[ALL LAUGHING]
Damn it.
What time is it?
Uh, a few more minutes.
[PHONE CHIMES]
Are you getting a lot
of VidTap notifications?
All the time.
It's addictive, isn't it?
I sat down to watch one video.
I was there for an hour.
BEN: Oh, it's the algorithm.
The only way they make money
is if you stay on it.
Is it kind of weird how
it tries to predict who you are?
Yeah, like, it thinks
I'm a mom who drinks a lot.
Maybe you are a mom who drinks a lot.
Thanks.
And now it thinks I'm mean.
It keeps sending me
these moms who scream at their daughters.
How does it even know I have daughters?
It guesses.
It looks at your social media
use, sees what you pause over,
and makes educated guesses.
I think it's more than that.
I started with thoughtful priests.
Now I'm with suicidal priests.
It's like the more I look at it, the more
it thinks I'm into violence and anger.
I'm getting moms who
want to kill their kids now.
Well, it's the American way.
When in doubt, go with violence and sex.
[PHONES CHIMING]
Our master calls.
DAVID: It's from Marie.
Oh, I got it too. It's live.
- MIKE: Is he okay?
- MARIE: Let me see!
- Let me see!
- Brandon! Brandon!
- Oh, God!
- Brandon!
- [SCREAMING]
- Oh, my God!
Oh, my God.
[BOYS SCREAMING]
Marie!
Marie!
It's back! It's back!
I can't take it anymore. Please, I can't
MIKE: It scratched him!
What scratched you?
The monster!
Right there.
BEN: Why did you
livestream the surveillance footage?
MARIE: I didn't.
I don't even know how to do that.
It's evil.
What is?
VidTap.
Everything was fine
until I started using it.
Now it's taken control of my account.
What do you mean?
It sent that livestream out.
I didn't.
BEN: Maybe your kids started the livestream?
KRISTEN: Oh, my God.
Marie.
Oh, my God!
Holy crap.
Oh, my God. [PANTING]
[SOBBING]
VidTap can't just start itself.
Are you sure?
In my science group,
there's someone who works at VidTap.
We can talk to her.
All right, I'll talk to the Monsignor
and get the ball rolling
towards an infestation exorcism.
Whoa.
Yeah. Are they better?
They're gonna go to sleep
in the living room again.
I told her to take the kids' phones
and turn off VidTap.
Good advice for us, too.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
You know, Ben, fuck you.
You're such an elitist.
This is the way to kill COVID.
[WHIRRING]
Oh, my God.
He was on a business trip and every night,
the phone calls with him
got weirder and weirder.
That's when you know he's cheating on you.
WOMAN: Is your husband
away from home too much?
[EXCLAIMS]
♪
Andy? Andy, are you there?
[CUTTING OUT]: The reception
Can you hear me okay?
Fuck.
Yeah, I-I Some. Barely.
Where are you, on the Col?
No, we're at base camp.
Okay, good. I-I can hear you now.
How's the rich client?
He's not putting you in danger, is he?
No, we're fine. I miss you all so much.
I got to go.
No, wait! Jesus!
[EXHALES]
I wanted to say happy anniversary.
Did you hear what I said?
I said happy anniversary.
Do you remember the first one?
Uh, I got to go.
What? Are you okay?
Yeah. I love you. Bye.
Damn it.
[GRUNTS]
Why didn't you tell me
it's their anniversary?
- What?
- She says "Happy Anniversary"
and I'm stuck there like an idiot.
It's not their anniversary.
That's in November.
[TYPING]
- Is she onto us?
- No.
She said happy anniversary.
Why would she say that
if she's not trying to trick us?
It's probably, like, the first time they met
or when they went climbing.
You're overreacting.
I don't like surprises.
Leland, no Don't do it. Leland.
Leland.
Don't wake him.
LELAND: Andy, I need an answer from you.
You know you're gonna spend
the rest of your life here.
But I can make your time here
pleasant or hard.
I know you can't talk,
but you can nod.
So my question is
is this your anniversary?
Mm.
- Oh, come on.
- It's just water.
Imagine
[HUMMING]
I could leave this dripping here
for 40 years.
The first year you might be fine.
But the third year,
you'd wish you could scream.
Now, is this your wedding anniversary?
Was it your first date?
Good.
You sit tight. We'll talk again soon.
Benny the boy genius!
- Hey. Oh.
- Hello.
Welcome to my work crib.
Yeah, yeah, thanks, Katie.
Thanks for seeing us.
Oh, this is my friends,
uh, David and Kristen.
The ones I was telling you about.
Right. The priest and the shrink.
Come on back.
- Benny the boy genius?
- No one calls me that.
I think I already know
the answer to this, Katie,
but, uh, can the app upload a video
from your phone without your consent?
Can't happen. Won't happen.
The user has to go into the application
and choose what content they want to share.
Mkay. Uh, next question:
can you view live video
from a person's phone
if they're not recording into the app?
No. Also impossible. Also won't happen.
Oh. Well, um
your turn.
Um, is the app evil?
Whoa. You're the priest, right?
I am.
I like religious people.
They make my job interesting.
My mom is Jehovah Witness.
She still thinks I'm doing
the devil's work here.
Was the app designed
with nefarious intentions?
Do you call bringing
the world together nefarious?
DAVID: That depends.
Bringing it together for what?
That's up to the world, isn't it?
Someone gets murdered at a picnic spot,
you don't blame the picnic spot.
Well, so, the more videos
I watch on the app,
the darker they become.
They become more about
jealousy, anger, hatred.
Well, that's just what you're choosing.
- Oh, no, but I'm not.
- Look, you may not think you are
but if you hesitate over a video
for just a split second longer,
the algorithm picks up on that.
Then it sends you
another video just like it.
Let's say a video about jealousy.
If you do the same thing again
hesitate just for a second
even if you eventually
click thumbs down,
it knows that's what you secretly want.
But what'll grab your attention
isn't always what you want.
KATIE: Maybe, but our algorithm
has one goal in mind:
keeping you engaged,
not making you a better person.
That's your job, not mine.
And we seem to be doing
a hell of a lot better.
Hope that was helpful.
Um, no, not really.
Well, maybe this will be.
We're not the problem.
Your subject is. Marie Taylor?
How'd you know her name?
I never told you her name.
Ben, VidTap knows
everything about our users.
Stop wasting your time arguing with
idiotic conspiracy theorists, by the way.
Marie edited her possession
videos in the application.
- So
- So, we have access
to the heads and tails
of the footage she shot
before she edited it.
Seriously?
And I can send it to you.
She didn't say what it was?
No. She's doing us a favor.
She could get in big trouble
for sending this.
Is she your girlfriend?
No.
[FLOORBOARDS CREAKING]
Oh, no.
[YELPS]
- Oh, my God.
- MARIE: Brandon.
God, are you okay? What happened?
[GROANING] It burns. My back burns!
- What? Turn over.
- Oh, my God. Brandon!
Brandon, are you okay?
- MARIE: Let me see.
- MIKE: What happened?
- What happened?
- MARIE: Let me see!
- Why would she do this?
- Why do you think?
Clout chasing?
Seriously?
- MIKE: What happened? What happened?
- Let me see!
Let me see.
MIKE: Oh, my God!
That simply isn't true. I would never.
We have the outtakes
of the videos you uploaded.
[SCOFFS] Those are my kids!
I-I've done everything to protect them.
Marie, we can find you help. Let us.
Possessed.
If what you say is true, then
I must have been possessed.
[PANTING]
Marie, don't.
You don't have to post
everything you do on VidTap.
What exactly are you gonna post
us calling you out
on attacking your own children?
[GROANING]
- Okay, great.
- Oh, my God.
What is this, Possession 101?
[PANTING]
[GROWLING]
[SPITTING]
[GROWLING]
[GROANING]
[MARIE PANTING]
- Aah!
- Oh, whoa!
[GRUNTING]
BEN: Call 911.
Satan, they're attacking me!
[GROANING]
No!
Hi, friends. We traced the IP address
of Pollie the Pig to a place called
MONKEY: St. Joseph's
Parish. We think it's a church.
ELEPHANT: And Pollie the Pig
is not a 14-year-old from Sun Valley.
He's a 60-year-old named Leland Townsend.
Your excellency, this is disgusting.
Someone's trying to set me up
Leland.
I need to thank you
for your months of service.
Monsignor, this is a lie.
Doesn't matter.
You know better than anyone.
The Church cannot risk the liability
in this matter.
We will, as always,
give you a positive recommendation
no matter your next ventures.
But I need to ask you to leave right now.
You're gonna be sorry.
It's a rare day when I'm not sorry.
- [DOOR SLAMS]
- [LELAND MUTTERING]
Whoa. What's your problem?
My problem is I think it's time
to make four little girls
four little orphans!
[PHONE CHIMING]
[PHONE CLATTERS]
[PHONE CHIMING]
♪
SHERYL: Oof. Your cuticles are dry.
Don't worry.
I don't want to hurt Kristen.
In, uh, a month or two,
Edward will call her,
tearful,
and say that you were killed
in an avalanche.
Your body will never be recovered.
You saved Edward and three other climbers
before being swept away.
Your daughters will think
you were a great man,
and will aspire to emulate you.
Edward is so appreciative that
not only does he give your
family the original $800,000,
but an additional $250,000
for the kids' education.
So
you're of more use to them gone
than back home.
Okay.
I'll keep you updated on how they're doing.
Oh, and I'll bring some oil
next time for those cuticles.
Okay.
[DOOR CLOSES]
[CANDICE GROWLING]
[SCREAMING]
CANDICE: Fuck you!
KRISTEN: Candice? Candice, can you hear me?
CANDICE: I will kill you, bitch.
- I want to help you, Candice.
- [CANDICE GASPING]
But you do need to answer a few questions.
Fuck you! I don't need an exorcism.
KRISTEN: Well, that's good
- because I'm not an exorcist.
- [CANDICE GROANING]
I'm a psychologist.
And I'm here to see if you might
[SCREAMING]
KRISTEN: I'm here to see if you
have any symptoms of mental illness.
GAL: I don't understand.
Why can't you just do it? Look at her.
It's a process, Ms. Berganza.
We have to determine
if there's something else
that could have caused this.
Caused this? What else could cause this?
Candice, have you experimented
with any drugs?
Fuck you!
[SOBBING]
KRISTEN: I saw in your
chart that you were diagnosed
with ADHD when you were younger.
[DEVICE CLICKING]
Did you ever take any medication for that?
[CANDICE HYPERVENTILATING]
Candice, I'm gonna help you, okay?
This is going to be over soon.
But I need you to answer a few questions.
When you were younger,
did you ever take any medications?
- [GROWLING]
- [PHONE CHIMING]
I'm going to help you
♪
[LAUGHING]
KORECKI: What is that? VidTap?
Well, you know how TikTok
replaced Instagram?
Okay, so VidTap replaced TikTok.
God, I feel old.
BEN: So, this is Candice's VidTap stream.
[GROWLING]
She shot her own possession?
Yes.
Oh, my God.
KRISTEN: It gets worse.
[CRUNCHING]
[STAMMERS] Is that real?
BEN: We think so.
KRISTEN: She had stitches in
her mouth from the cuts, so
H-How long ago was that?
Two weeks.
And is she like that now?
A version of that.
Oh, okay.
I-I'll contact Father Amara.
W-We need to get going on this.
I'm not sure about that.
- What do you mean?
- Why is she recording all these?
Wh-Why does it matter?
Well, I just think it's weird.
Right? I mean, she's chewing glass,
she's out of control, but
she makes sure that the camera can see
the blood in her mouth.
While you figure out what that means,
I-I'll brief Amara on this.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
You think it was faked?
No, I think the, uh, blood is real.
I think the stitches are real.
I just don't understand.
She's got eight other videos
of her possession,
and each of them are perfectly
timed to the length of the app.
Hmm. You think her mom's recording them?
Maybe, but that's pretty sick.
Uh, oh, Kristen, there was one more thing.
The archdiocese did
an investigation of Mr. Townsend
visiting your daughter at school.
- Luxanne.
- Lexis.
You'll be pleased to know
that we found no impropriety there.
Leland was purely at the school
at the request of a teacher.
That's how he saw your daughter.
It was by accident, that's all.
- On four separate occasions?
- He was there at the request
of a teacher, Ms. Christine Rutherford.
And four times he asked my daughter
to lie about seeing him.
Well, actually,
the archdiocese found
no evidence of that lie.
Except from my daughter?
We've talked to all
the teachers at the school.
They swear that Leland
has been perfectly professional
in his approach to children.
But in an abundance of caution,
we've asked Leland to
no longer visit the school.
I'm sorry
- It likes it here.
- Okay, serious time.
We need to talk about Leland.
- Why?
- The archdiocese says
he's innocent and he can do
whatever he wants,
so we're gonna have to rely
on each other now, okay?
What's that mean?
We're going to talk about emergency plans.
These are cards that I made up.
They have all of our numbers,
police numbers, and emergency plans
for what to do when he approaches you
at home or at school.
I'm gonna put these in your backpacks
- with your school ID.
- Wow, Mom.
We are taking this seriously, okay?
All right. Go get ready for bed.
I'm gonna be working in my room.
[DOOR SHUTS]
- Wow, Mom doesn't seem good.
- LILA: I know.
We need to do something about Leland.
Well, we could kill him.
Poison him.
I'm actually on board with that
- at this point.
- LILA: That's not even funny.
We could ask Grandma.
[OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
- Guys. Guys.
- What?
He's still on Bumblebee Valley.
[WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
Hello, Lynda.
It's your old friend Pollie the Pig.
What are you doing?
[TYPING]
Hi, Pollie. I don't know. I'm kind of sad.
Well, tell Pollie why. Maybe I can help.
Tell him it's about Mom.
No, no, tell him you're angry at Mom.
No, you should say you took
his advice, but it didn't work.
LILA: Oh, yeah.
I tried that prank on my mom,
but she found the pills in her dinner.
Now I'm in trouble.
Did you crush the pills first?
It has to be a powder.
Then you can stir it in.
[LAUGHS] He's toast.
[CANDICE CRUNCHING]
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
[SOBBING]
[SCREAMING]
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
[SCREAMING]
[SCREAMING]
You guys seen the one with the bloody tears?
- Just now.
- Yeah, it's official.
Everyone on the Internet is possessed.
- DAVID: How many are there?
- KRISTEN: Thousands.
- I barely scratched the surface.
- Mm.
- [MAN GROWLING]
- It's addictive.
It's like eating potato chips.
[GROANS]
[SCREAMS]
[RASPY VOICE]: Satan is my name!
[ROARING]
- These aren't real, right?
- I think the reality
is that there's a mental health epidemic.
Not a possession epidemic.
But Candice was eating glass.
She had stitches.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
What?
I've heard that before
in other possession videos.
What?
That growl with the Latin.
Okay, this is a source function key.
It will find every video
that uses that sound.
Okay, so she copied it.
Oh, a lot of people copied it.
But let's see where they all copied it from.
There's the root of the tree.
[SPEAKING LATIN IN DEEP VOICE]
CANDICE: So?
That's where I got the Latin phrase
- to summon the devil.
- BEN: No.
That's where you got
the sound file to lip-synch to.
Mom.
Get them out of here.
I-I don't understand, Father.
- Are you saying none of this is real?
- DAVID: No.
Candice really ate glass.
But she's doing that
because she's influenced
by this magician,
The Great Heller.
He's a magician?
He was a magician.
Now he's using the same tricks
to become a social media influencer.
I'm gonna leave some of these for you.
This is what The Great Heller uses.
Sugar glass.
KRISTEN: He's a liar who's getting
other people on VidTap to copy him.
Ms. Berganza, your daughter
is not possessed.
However, she is in need
of some professional help.
♪
Okay, so this is my first VidTap video
and hopefully my last.
But I think that too many kids
are copying this guy:
The Great Heller.
Okay, he's a magician
and he's using his magic tricks
to make you guys think that he's possessed.
But he's not, okay?
This is him levitating.
And this is how he does it
in his magic show.
Oh, look at me.
I'm possessed. Look.
It only took me five minutes.
And this is how he eats glass.
[CRUNCHING]
Sugar glass.
These are fake blood capsules.
You just bite down on them
[CRUNCHING]
and there you go.
It's all fake.
Don't be an idiot. Okay?
Just don't hurt yourself.
Don't copy assholes like this magician
who are just using magic to
make you think they're possessed
so they can rack up likes.
♪
[COMPUTER CHIMING]
♪
[CHIMING INCREASES]
[PHONE CHIMES]
Oh, God.
[SIGHS]
Hey, moms. Want to know the perfect way
to pack your kid's lunch?
- No.
- The key is
Here's another mom hack
that changed my life.
Today, the perfect margarita.
Let's face it, for moms like us,
the best margarita is a fast margarita.
- Yeah.
- So
I use a canned one.
Then, an airplane-sized tequila.
Then, Cointreau.
And I pour Pop Rocks on a plate.
Moisten the rim of your glass
Where there is hatred, let me sow love.
- Where there is injury
- [PHONE CHIMES]
♪
It's hard to be a priest.
You're alone most of the time.
But if you're a Black priest
it's doubly hard.
"And the Lord God said,
"'It is not good that man should be alone;
I will make him a helper.'"
[COMPUTER CHIMING]
@BenS, who made you
the expert on possessions?
What gives you the right to determine
if someone is really suffering
from a demonic posse?
Fuck you, BenS
Hey, BenS, why don't you get a life
and stop coming after teenage girls
on the Internet?
MAN: My son is possessed.
You don't believe me? You come over here
and clean up the fucking vomit.
I don't know if all these
other videos are fake, BenS,
but I have two kids, and they are terrified
of something coming
into their room at night.
I thought they were just making it up.
So I put a camera in their room.
[CLATTERING]
Oh, my gosh. Oh, no.
[CLATTERING]
Oh, my gosh.
MARIE: I don't know what to do.
But this is real.
And-and I need help.
♪
♪
♪
- [WHIMSICAL MUSIC PLAYING]
- Hi, everyone.
I love Bumblebee Valley.
It's my favorite game.
But there is one big problem.
Pollie the Pig is a pedophile.
[SCOFFS]
Done.
GIRAFFE: It's true.
He won't stop bothering me either.
ELEPHANT: We looked into it
and found out Piggy567
isn't a 13-year-old girl.
He's a 60-year-old man.
Yuck.
When we found this out,
we started recording
every time he was inappropriate.
Is this your house, Lynda?
[DISTORTED]: Can I see inside?
I'm lonely, Lynda. Aren't you?
I'd rather be alone with you
than with all your friends.
Remember, this is a 60-year-old man.
Creepy. Creepy.
- What the fuck?
- BUNNY: I agree.
We don't want pedophiles on here.
We want real kids.
So listen up, Pollie the Pig. Go away.
COW: Does anyone know where his house is?
I think we should burn it down.
I think it's over here. Grab some firewood.
Oh, Lexis, Lexis.
I went on VidTap to see
if anyone was going through the same thing.
And that's when I found
your video on possessions.
Public service.
MARIE: Anyway, I-I thought you could
figure out what's going on in my house.
Did Ben tell you what we do, ma'am?
MARIE: You're with the Catholic Church.
- You look into hauntings.
- DAVID: Well,
demonic infestations.
We might not be able to help you,
but we probably could point you
in the direction of someone who could.
That's all I want.
I just want someone to take me seriously.
How are your kids doing, Marie?
MARIE: You saw the video?
They can't sleep. And I move them
from room to room,
but then it happens there too.
So we moved out here.
But it's gotten worse.
What do you mean, worse?
I think it's inside them.
This was last night.
Okay, what are we looking at here?
MARIE: I heard Mikey screaming,
so I got up and stopped it
before Bran could start the dryer.
- Sleepwalking?
- Maybe.
This is from two nights ago.
Is it possible that your kids
are playing a prank on you?
They wouldn't. A-And I don't see how.
Marie, do you mind if we speak to your kids?
Why did you put your brother
in the dryer, Brandon?
Um, I was hiding him.
Hiding him from what?
The-the thing that comes
into our room at night.
Okay.
And you're sure you're not
doing it to scare your mom?
You don't believe us.
No, we we're just trying to
find out why this is happening.
Oh, buddy.
So, the house has
a concrete slab foundation.
And the way that concrete
is finished and cures
makes a completely level slab impossible.
So, you think the floor's slanted
that's why the bed moved?
Scientific method.
Well, you solved one thing, anyway.
- No.
- Why not?
The bed rolled that way.
KRISTEN: Look, Marie,
I I can't tell you anything
without a fuller examination, but your kids
are terrified of this house, that's clear.
Do you have anywhere you could go?
I'm a single mom.
I inherited this house
from my parents. I have nowhere.
Well, I can check with the Church and see
if there are any options.
BEN: The time codes on all these videos
it reads around 2:00 a.m.
Is that when all these things happen?
I think so. Why?
Um, do you have any enemies?
I don't think so. What do you mean?
Well, there's a chance that these things
are pranks being pulled by
someone who wants to hurt you.
I mean, do you have any tenants?
No.
A school teacher a few
months ago, but she moved out.
Because she was scared?
Oh, I don't know. We didn't talk much.
DAVID: Okay.
Well, we would like to
come back later tonight,
if that's all right.
About 1:00 a.m.?
Okay.
That's how we investigate infestations.
If that's all right.
Yes, yeah.
I think Brandon and Mikey will feel safer
with other people here.
So, what are we thinking?
I have no frigging idea.
WOMAN: Who is this guy Ben
to tell us what is true and what isn't?
He doesn't control facts.
Watch, Ben.
Cotton candy.
Oh, my God.
Are you fucking kidding me?
Okay, I don't control truth,
but if your dryer
is hot enough to melt sugar,
you'd be basically lighting
your clothes on fire
every time you dried them, okay?
Come on, people, just use
Use your brains.
WOMAN: Yep,
I'm drinking again.
I thought my daughter was a good girl.
And then I cleaned her room,
and what do you think I found?
That's right.
My daughter is sleeping around.
So I read the best thing
you can do for your kids
is to give them rules.
So I put my house rules on a chalkboard.
Then I go to clean their rooms,
and guess what I found on the back.
They replaced my rules with their rules.
♪
MAN: I have dark thoughts.
I have thoughts of going on Tinder.
I watch online porn,
and all I think about is being with someone.
All I want to do is talk to someone.
DEMON KRISTEN: Talk to me.
[EXHALES]
No.
I told you it's over.
The sex was over.
Not the talking.
What's wrong with talking?
God, you're so transparent.
What do you mean?
I mean you're using my weakness against me.
There are things you'd love
to talk to Kristen about,
but you can't, right?
So talk to me.
- I won't bite.
- If there's something
I want to talk to Kristen about,
I'll talk to Kristen.
Well, then talk to her about the Entity.
See?
You can't.
You promised not to tell anyone.
But here I am.
You're worried the Entity
is using you, right?
I'm not worried.
I know they're using me.
That's the whole point.
Right, but
what do you owe God?
And what do you owe
these stupid little spies?
If it saves Grace
Ling, then it's worth it.
Oh, yeah. The prophet.
But he hasn't mentioned
Grace Ling in a long time, right?
How long has it been a month?
You say that you think
I'm using your weakness against you.
I think Victor
knew your weakness about Grace.
That you missed her.
And he's using that.
Using that for what?
Think something about
that Chinese man that died.
All those people in that room.
Why did they want you
to leave the door open?
- I don't care.
- But you do.
That's why you googled it.
Right?
But you couldn't find anything
about a man dying
- at the Hotel Percival, right?
- That means nothing.
It means you can't trust the Entity.
And I should trust you?
A demon.
David
I'm not just a demon.
I'm you.
I'm in here.
No.
You know what this is?
I never wanted you back
until I started watching
those VidTap videos.
They're leading me to temptation.
That's what this is.
[THUDDING]
David?
David?
[SQUELCHING]
David!
DAVID: Sister, what are you doing?
What are youdoing?
Letting that thing attach itself to you.
What are you talking about?
- That demon.
- Sister, I was just sleeping.
David, there was something attached to you.
What are you doing?
I'm going out to assess,
that's what I'm doing.
No, you let something into your life.
Sister, I have to go.
Please, don't come in my room
unless I ask you.
I don't know how anyone thought
I was a 60-year-old man.
As if.
I think I've been too nice here,
trying to make friends.
And some people want to hurt me.
This is my home. Look!
I am 14 years old.
I live in Sun Valley.
My mom is dead.
And now I have nowhere to live.
People should stop
being mean to me.
All I want to do is make friends.
- Oh, we need to shut this guy down.
- What are we doing?
- LAURA: Just watch.
- LILA: We're pissing him off.
LYNN: He's pissing us off.
- [OVERLAPPING CHATTER]
- Can we please
Just watch this.
Hey, friends.
We traced the IP address of Pollie the Pig
to a place called
St. Joseph's Parish.
- We think it's a church.
- ELEPHANT: And Pollie the Pig
is not a 14-year-old from Sun Valley.
He's a 60-year-old named Leland Townsend.
[ALL LAUGHING]
Damn it.
What time is it?
Uh, a few more minutes.
[PHONE CHIMES]
Are you getting a lot
of VidTap notifications?
All the time.
It's addictive, isn't it?
I sat down to watch one video.
I was there for an hour.
BEN: Oh, it's the algorithm.
The only way they make money
is if you stay on it.
Is it kind of weird how
it tries to predict who you are?
Yeah, like, it thinks
I'm a mom who drinks a lot.
Maybe you are a mom who drinks a lot.
Thanks.
And now it thinks I'm mean.
It keeps sending me
these moms who scream at their daughters.
How does it even know I have daughters?
It guesses.
It looks at your social media
use, sees what you pause over,
and makes educated guesses.
I think it's more than that.
I started with thoughtful priests.
Now I'm with suicidal priests.
It's like the more I look at it, the more
it thinks I'm into violence and anger.
I'm getting moms who
want to kill their kids now.
Well, it's the American way.
When in doubt, go with violence and sex.
[PHONES CHIMING]
Our master calls.
DAVID: It's from Marie.
Oh, I got it too. It's live.
- MIKE: Is he okay?
- MARIE: Let me see!
- Let me see!
- Brandon! Brandon!
- Oh, God!
- Brandon!
- [SCREAMING]
- Oh, my God!
Oh, my God.
[BOYS SCREAMING]
Marie!
Marie!
It's back! It's back!
I can't take it anymore. Please, I can't
MIKE: It scratched him!
What scratched you?
The monster!
Right there.
BEN: Why did you
livestream the surveillance footage?
MARIE: I didn't.
I don't even know how to do that.
It's evil.
What is?
VidTap.
Everything was fine
until I started using it.
Now it's taken control of my account.
What do you mean?
It sent that livestream out.
I didn't.
BEN: Maybe your kids started the livestream?
KRISTEN: Oh, my God.
Marie.
Oh, my God!
Holy crap.
Oh, my God. [PANTING]
[SOBBING]
VidTap can't just start itself.
Are you sure?
In my science group,
there's someone who works at VidTap.
We can talk to her.
All right, I'll talk to the Monsignor
and get the ball rolling
towards an infestation exorcism.
Whoa.
Yeah. Are they better?
They're gonna go to sleep
in the living room again.
I told her to take the kids' phones
and turn off VidTap.
Good advice for us, too.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
You know, Ben, fuck you.
You're such an elitist.
This is the way to kill COVID.
[WHIRRING]
Oh, my God.
He was on a business trip and every night,
the phone calls with him
got weirder and weirder.
That's when you know he's cheating on you.
WOMAN: Is your husband
away from home too much?
[EXCLAIMS]
♪
Andy? Andy, are you there?
[CUTTING OUT]: The reception
Can you hear me okay?
Fuck.
Yeah, I-I Some. Barely.
Where are you, on the Col?
No, we're at base camp.
Okay, good. I-I can hear you now.
How's the rich client?
He's not putting you in danger, is he?
No, we're fine. I miss you all so much.
I got to go.
No, wait! Jesus!
[EXHALES]
I wanted to say happy anniversary.
Did you hear what I said?
I said happy anniversary.
Do you remember the first one?
Uh, I got to go.
What? Are you okay?
Yeah. I love you. Bye.
Damn it.
[GRUNTS]
Why didn't you tell me
it's their anniversary?
- What?
- She says "Happy Anniversary"
and I'm stuck there like an idiot.
It's not their anniversary.
That's in November.
[TYPING]
- Is she onto us?
- No.
She said happy anniversary.
Why would she say that
if she's not trying to trick us?
It's probably, like, the first time they met
or when they went climbing.
You're overreacting.
I don't like surprises.
Leland, no Don't do it. Leland.
Leland.
Don't wake him.
LELAND: Andy, I need an answer from you.
You know you're gonna spend
the rest of your life here.
But I can make your time here
pleasant or hard.
I know you can't talk,
but you can nod.
So my question is
is this your anniversary?
Mm.
- Oh, come on.
- It's just water.
Imagine
[HUMMING]
I could leave this dripping here
for 40 years.
The first year you might be fine.
But the third year,
you'd wish you could scream.
Now, is this your wedding anniversary?
Was it your first date?
Good.
You sit tight. We'll talk again soon.
Benny the boy genius!
- Hey. Oh.
- Hello.
Welcome to my work crib.
Yeah, yeah, thanks, Katie.
Thanks for seeing us.
Oh, this is my friends,
uh, David and Kristen.
The ones I was telling you about.
Right. The priest and the shrink.
Come on back.
- Benny the boy genius?
- No one calls me that.
I think I already know
the answer to this, Katie,
but, uh, can the app upload a video
from your phone without your consent?
Can't happen. Won't happen.
The user has to go into the application
and choose what content they want to share.
Mkay. Uh, next question:
can you view live video
from a person's phone
if they're not recording into the app?
No. Also impossible. Also won't happen.
Oh. Well, um
your turn.
Um, is the app evil?
Whoa. You're the priest, right?
I am.
I like religious people.
They make my job interesting.
My mom is Jehovah Witness.
She still thinks I'm doing
the devil's work here.
Was the app designed
with nefarious intentions?
Do you call bringing
the world together nefarious?
DAVID: That depends.
Bringing it together for what?
That's up to the world, isn't it?
Someone gets murdered at a picnic spot,
you don't blame the picnic spot.
Well, so, the more videos
I watch on the app,
the darker they become.
They become more about
jealousy, anger, hatred.
Well, that's just what you're choosing.
- Oh, no, but I'm not.
- Look, you may not think you are
but if you hesitate over a video
for just a split second longer,
the algorithm picks up on that.
Then it sends you
another video just like it.
Let's say a video about jealousy.
If you do the same thing again
hesitate just for a second
even if you eventually
click thumbs down,
it knows that's what you secretly want.
But what'll grab your attention
isn't always what you want.
KATIE: Maybe, but our algorithm
has one goal in mind:
keeping you engaged,
not making you a better person.
That's your job, not mine.
And we seem to be doing
a hell of a lot better.
Hope that was helpful.
Um, no, not really.
Well, maybe this will be.
We're not the problem.
Your subject is. Marie Taylor?
How'd you know her name?
I never told you her name.
Ben, VidTap knows
everything about our users.
Stop wasting your time arguing with
idiotic conspiracy theorists, by the way.
Marie edited her possession
videos in the application.
- So
- So, we have access
to the heads and tails
of the footage she shot
before she edited it.
Seriously?
And I can send it to you.
She didn't say what it was?
No. She's doing us a favor.
She could get in big trouble
for sending this.
Is she your girlfriend?
No.
[FLOORBOARDS CREAKING]
Oh, no.
[YELPS]
- Oh, my God.
- MARIE: Brandon.
God, are you okay? What happened?
[GROANING] It burns. My back burns!
- What? Turn over.
- Oh, my God. Brandon!
Brandon, are you okay?
- MARIE: Let me see.
- MIKE: What happened?
- What happened?
- MARIE: Let me see!
- Why would she do this?
- Why do you think?
Clout chasing?
Seriously?
- MIKE: What happened? What happened?
- Let me see!
Let me see.
MIKE: Oh, my God!
That simply isn't true. I would never.
We have the outtakes
of the videos you uploaded.
[SCOFFS] Those are my kids!
I-I've done everything to protect them.
Marie, we can find you help. Let us.
Possessed.
If what you say is true, then
I must have been possessed.
[PANTING]
Marie, don't.
You don't have to post
everything you do on VidTap.
What exactly are you gonna post
us calling you out
on attacking your own children?
[GROANING]
- Okay, great.
- Oh, my God.
What is this, Possession 101?
[PANTING]
[GROWLING]
[SPITTING]
[GROWLING]
[GROANING]
[MARIE PANTING]
- Aah!
- Oh, whoa!
[GRUNTING]
BEN: Call 911.
Satan, they're attacking me!
[GROANING]
No!
Hi, friends. We traced the IP address
of Pollie the Pig to a place called
MONKEY: St. Joseph's
Parish. We think it's a church.
ELEPHANT: And Pollie the Pig
is not a 14-year-old from Sun Valley.
He's a 60-year-old named Leland Townsend.
Your excellency, this is disgusting.
Someone's trying to set me up
Leland.
I need to thank you
for your months of service.
Monsignor, this is a lie.
Doesn't matter.
You know better than anyone.
The Church cannot risk the liability
in this matter.
We will, as always,
give you a positive recommendation
no matter your next ventures.
But I need to ask you to leave right now.
You're gonna be sorry.
It's a rare day when I'm not sorry.
- [DOOR SLAMS]
- [LELAND MUTTERING]
Whoa. What's your problem?
My problem is I think it's time
to make four little girls
four little orphans!
[PHONE CHIMING]
[PHONE CLATTERS]
[PHONE CHIMING]
♪
SHERYL: Oof. Your cuticles are dry.
Don't worry.
I don't want to hurt Kristen.
In, uh, a month or two,
Edward will call her,
tearful,
and say that you were killed
in an avalanche.
Your body will never be recovered.
You saved Edward and three other climbers
before being swept away.
Your daughters will think
you were a great man,
and will aspire to emulate you.
Edward is so appreciative that
not only does he give your
family the original $800,000,
but an additional $250,000
for the kids' education.
So
you're of more use to them gone
than back home.
Okay.
I'll keep you updated on how they're doing.
Oh, and I'll bring some oil
next time for those cuticles.
Okay.
[DOOR CLOSES]