Daria s03e07 Episode Script

They broke into her bedroom.
She burst into song! The inappropriate alto, tonight on Sick, Sad World! I got a big wheel rolling in my heart.
I really don't know what that's supposed to mean.
It means a Lawndale morning's going to start.
Put on your pants! We're seeing more than should be seen.
I'll say! Today I'll be the perfect working wife and mother.
Today I'll show my clients that this man is strong.
But, oh, today's booked up like every other.
I'll probably tell my clients that they're right and I am wrong.
But still it's morning in the 'burbs.
It's such a great day, I wish I could buy it.
I look so good it makes my eyeballs hurt.
Does this go with this top? Should I try it? Oh, put on any skirt or shirt.
You'd even look good wearing dirt.
Thanks! On this morning in the 'burbs.
Oh me, oh my.
A lovely day is dawning.
Oh, what a joy I didn't wake up dead.
So I can go to school and then resume my yawning, and get my sleep in class instead of in my bed.
Morning, Helen.
Morning, Jake.
Hair all right? Looks kind of fake.
Great! And now my leave I'll take.
- It's off to work I go.
- Bye! What's the weather like today? Maybe a hurricane on the way.
But it's such a lovely day.
What does science know? Oh, that's great.
The toast is cold.
What tales of nothing will unfold? Here on this same old This same old Morning in the 'burbs! Oh, my gosh! Look at the Jell-O! It's jiggling.
Worried about the competition? Don't you see? It changed into the school colors on Pep Rally Day.
There really is a school spirit! Spooky.
Pep Rally Day? I guess we'd better make alternate plans.
Hello, Mr.
Roof.
Um, as captain of the team, I want to say, there are some things more important than winning.
Yeah, like kicking some damn butt! All right! We are the champions, my friends! - Uh, Kevin? - I'm the Q.
B.
! Excuse me.
Everybody, simmer down.
Calm down.
Calm down! That little hurricane advisory has been upgraded to a hurricane warning! Are we all going to die? Not on school property! You're all to go home.
What about the big game? Canceled! No! Yes! Now, everybody out.
Everybody out.
An ordered, quiet exit is what exiting's about.
You will not scream or howl or shout! Everybody out, everybody out.
But what if, what if, what if the town blew away? Where would the football players play? Where would we go to shop all day? Would we still get three months off with pay? If the town blew away? Nowhere isn't anywhere I want to live.
Nowhere makes Lawndale look all right.
Nowhere is an address that's very hard to give.
When you ask for a ride home on Friday night.
I hope you're not too sad that you don't get to play.
I am, but I think the weather's fine.
"X-Files" says this is just the sneaky way the authorities create, like, a natural disaster thing to cover up the real reason the game's canceled.
I mean, big game, big storm coincidence? Well, we're not falling for their line! Come on, Kevvy, don't be mad.
I've got a way to make you glad.
We'll go up to some other place.
Hey, that's cool, babe.
Let's go suck face! Hey, look at what the newspaper is saying.
What? It says a great big storm is on the way.
Cool.
The roof's not really where we should be staying.
Why? 'Cause this big-ass storm is happening today.
Hey, what if the town blew away? My sister would have nowhere to stay.
The mall would be gone, and that's okay.
Down on your knees and begin to pray that the town blows away.
Let's head down.
I want to live to see what this place looks like after it's obliterated.
You know, being a post-apocalyptic town is going to be cool.
Other towns will be scared of us.
I'm sure they already are.
Oh, look, a hurricane of passion.
Hi! I hate to interrupt, but the newspaper says there's a big storm coming.
You might want to take your wholesome sports activities indoors.
Wait, the newspaper said that? Oh, man! I thought Ms.
Li was just covering up.
Yeah, she was messing with our minds.
Why doesn't that add up for me? Ladies first.
No! Great.
Now we're not only going to die, the headline's going to read "Quarterback and others perish.
" I always knew that I would die in Nowheresville.
But I didn't think I'd die there quite so soon.
Hey, this is like that video, "When Scary Storms Kill!" Will being dead wreck my afternoon? If the town blows away? Um, Helen, I was just wondering.
If there isn't anything more to do, you know, I thought maybe I could go home and say good-bye to my loved ones.
Oh, I suppose I can send this fax myself.
Thank you! Kiss the kids good-bye for me I mean, good night.
Damn! Helen! What are you doing here?! There's a hurricane coming! I know I never said it before, but Helen oh, Helen you're so swell en.
Hot damn! I'll e-mail you.
Don't worry about me.
I've just got a few things to wrap up and then I'll be where's my appointment book? This one doesn't make so much noise.
But Quinn, aren't you afraid that you look like a Hefty bag not that you do.
No way.
Sorry, ladies, the store's closing.
The hurricane.
Let's get out of here while there's still time to walk.
Running for your life is so geeky.
Oh, no.
Wind hair.
Come on, Quinn.
We'll come back tomorrow and find a color that doesn't make you look so sick.
We'll find a better color tomorrow?! Don't they know I can't leave yet? Why don't they know? It's easy to see that I can't go till I'm dressed perfectly? Why don't they guess? It's more than a quirk.
I've got to confess I'm addicted to work.
A shrink would have a field day with my head.
If he listened to the sentence I just said.
Obsessive kids and moms just might be ticking bombs.
So I'll keep it to myself instead.
It doesn't matter really what I do or wear.
I could do a half-assed job and nobody would care.
But wowing colleagues and friends is the greatest of life's ends.
So when life ends at least it ends with style and flair! Coming in second wouldn't be the worst.
As long as no one else was first.
Oh, don't they know? Tell them it's so.
Don't they know I can't leave yet? Okay, Mom, I'm coming home.
I'll be the one in the Hefty bag.
Hello.
You've reached the Morgendorffer residence.
No one's home right now.
What do you mean, no one's home right now?! Daria, Quinn? Please get home and answer the damn phone! I got a foot on the gas and a hammer in my head thinking 'bout my girls and the ways they might be dead.
They should be safe at home and warm and by the fire instead of warming up to sing in that heavenly choir.
Gah, gah, damn it! Learn to drive, jerk! Gah, gah, damn it! Glad you got your horn to work! Gah, gah, damn it! Stay in your lane! There's a hurricane coming and I'm going insane! Quit swearing like a drunkard and get right with the Lord.
We're a very moral family with a baby on board.
And I say gah, gah, damn it! Oh me, oh my! Gah, gah, damn it! We hope that you die! Gah, gah, damn it! You tell 'em, jack! I think I see my turn-off so you'd better get back! Gah, gah, damn it! Now, let's see.
We've got the windows taped up, emergency provisions, spare batteries oh, I wish I knew that your father and Daria were safe! Quinn, what are you doing? Making cocoa.
Why? I saw this TV movie about this really cute family of teens who got stranded during a hurricane.
When they got nervous, they'd drink cocoa.
Now, sweetie, there's nothing to worry about.
Looters! Helen, Quinn! Daria? Oh, no! I was hoping she was with you.
You mean she's out there? In that maelstrom?! Oh, God, no! It's not actually raining yet, Jake.
She's probably at her friend's house.
Yes, yes, that's where she is! Hello, hello?! Quinn, pour your father some of that cocoa.
Hello? No, Daria's not here.
You want the Morgendorffers.
God! I am the Morgendorffers! Give me that.
Hello? Trent? You haven't seen the girls? Are your parents there? Are they in town at all? Have you done anything to prepare for this hurricane? Yes, hurricane! Trent, I want you to come over and wait for the girls here.
You'll be safer.
Then put some on! And get over here now, young man! Doesn't anybody in this town wear pants anymore? It's like this: if we don't go into that water tank shack, we'll blow off the roof and die.
But it looks so I believe "icky" is the word you're groping for.
Um, Brittany, would you mind pointing those things in another direction? Sorry.
My parents are probably starting to worry.
I know mine would be, if they were in town.
What about Trent? I'll bet he's upset.
I'll bet he's snoring.
Our families and friends Busy saving their rear ends May have overlooked an absent teen or two.
But by now they're catching on that two well-liked kids are gone And I'll bet that someone's even missing you.
So, while the wind does blow on our loved ones down below, we wish that we could tell them we're okay.
And I'd say I'm on the roof with a bimbo and a goof, but I'm due to come back down most any day.
They must be worried.
They're probably distressed.
They must be worried.
It's causing them unrest.
They must be worried.
It's really hard to guess exactly what Quinn's thinking, though my instinct says it's probably about her shoes.
Mom and Dad, though, I don't think are exactly tickled pink that I've vanished, and that I've left no clues.
They must be worried.
I wouldn't be surprised.
They must be worried.
Getting misty in the eyes.
They must be Worried.
I can't take it anymore! Whoa.
No more cocoa for you, man.
It's not the cocoa.
The cocoa's fine! Thanks! It's this sitting here doing nothing! My little girl's lost in the middle of a hurricane! I should be out there looking for her! Jake, I'm sure Daria had the good sense to find shelter.
There's no point in putting yourself in danger, acting like an idiot with a Superman complex.
Damn it, Helen! This is no time for your girlie crap! What? That touchy-feely garbage! Who do you want in an emergency: Superman, or your damn inner child? I'm acting like an idiot? No! I'm acting like a man! It used to be enough to be strong and good and tough and go try whatever hasn't been tried.
But now I'm a jerk with a brain that doesn't work if I don't consult my feminine side of what it is to be manly.
Manly! Maybe we should stay here and hug.
Would that be more manly? Manly! Oh, kill me now, I think I squashed a bug.
Trent, can't you talk some sense into him? Sounds sensible enough to me.
I can show that I care.
I can cry, I can share.
Got my brain in a sensitive whirl.
But please tell me why being such a modern guy makes me feel like a bearded girl! I guess that's not manly.
Manly! I do nothing, but hey, I feel, I feel mighty manly.
Manly! I'm so excited I just might scream.
Come here, big guy.
You got it, boss.
I'm proud to be the home of a Y chromosome.
I'm proud this hair is growing on my chin.
Let's get the hell out there.
Find those girls for who we care.
We won't be back till we can bring 'em in.
We're gonna be manly.
Manly! Hang on, help is on the way! It's time to be manly.
Manly! Honey is that okay? Manly! C'mon, Trent! Your daughter and my sister are out there.
That doesn't sound right.
And we've got to find them.
It's our duty, damn it! Damn it, you're right! Damn it, let's go! Jakey, be careful.
Yeah, dad.
Got to save those girls, damn it! Damn it, let's do it! Damn it! Um, don't look now, but our little love nest is about to collapse.
Oh, no! What do we do? I guess we're going to have to take our chances out there.
Okay, ready? I'm going to open the door.
Like before? Just like before.
I give up, it's stuck.
You give up? You can't give up! The girl with the squeak says it's no time to be meek.
Time to do what you manly men do.
She means break down the door.
Give a holler or a roar, make some stupid football noise and bust through.
You've got to be manly.
Manly! My great aunt could do better, and she's dead! Come on and be manly! Manly! Now apply your mighty helmet of a head! Manly! Did he hurt himself? Not anywhere either of you would notice.
Hey, check it out.
The storm's over.
Kevvy, you did it! And look, Brittany, he also made a rainbow.
Is there anything this popular boy can't do? The big, wet rainstorm's over.
We're happy we're still here.
The big, wet rainstorm's over.
The end came very near.
We didn't die with Brittany.
Instead, we got to sit and see Kevin's head act mightily! Oh, babe! The big, wet rainstorm's over! The big, wet rainstorm's over.
Where's Quinn? And do we care? The big, wet rainstorm's over.
She's in a store somewhere.
How do you like this jersey top? Its colors make your highlights pop.
Okay, we're dressed, now we can shop.
The big, wet rainstorm's over! The big, wet rainstorm's over and Lawndale's still the same.
The big, wet rainstorm's over and our life is once more tame.
Though if the town were gone today And all the people blown away We'd be in the major-i-tay.
The big, wet rainstorm's over.
The big, wet rainstorm's over.
I think you hurt your car.
The big, wet rainstorm's over.
Now will you go real far away from me because, you see, I crashed my car into a tree and I'm as mad as mad can be! The big, wet rainstorm's over.
You okay? I'm okay.
You okay? A-okay! The big, wet rainstorm's over.
The air bag saved our life.
The big, wet rainstorm's over.
Explain this to the wife! Now will you please get out and see The damage done by this here tree? The sight's a bit too much for me! The big, wet rainstorm's over! Janey! Oh, man, you're all right.
Trent, you were worried.
And you're okay too, Daria.
Cool.
Mm-hmm, fine.
Daria, you're safe! Dad, you crashed the car.
I don't care a fig about my smashed-up Lexus.
You're really what my caring is all about.
That must be why you've crushed my solar plexus.
I'm sorry, hon, but I'm so happy I could shout.
So you found my sis at last.
Crashed the car.
Ah, the past is past.
At least you didn't break your neck.
Could have, though.
But what the heck, 'cause Today was strange in extremes, and that's put lightly.
And yet, it started out so dull, and pretty dumb.
And so, this feeling I feel I don't feel slightly.
It's the hope that tomorrow will come, and another weird morning.
Yes, a-dawning.
An exciting new day a-borning.
No need for a surgeon general's warning.
Morning Morning! It's morning, morning, morning in the 'burbs! Written by Glenn Eichler and Peter Réponses au blindtest : closing credits Sven Faller - Manly