Xiaolin Showdown (2003) s03e07 Episode Script
The Return of Master Monk Guan
1
Xiaolin Showdown
Xiaolin Showdown
The Fancy Feet
is no ordinary Wu.
'Whoever posses the Wu'
'can move faster than
anything in the world.'
'It's quiet handy
when chasing an evil doer'
'or running away
from a bully half your size.'
I've always
wanted Fancy Feet.
Hey, I would settle
for just feet.
Guys, we got Wu at 5 o'clock.
Ying Yang, looks like
we have unwelcome company.
Looks like
we're gonna kick Bean butt.
He he. You don't think I'd be
so foolish as to comealone.
Whoa!
It is the Blind Swordsman.
What is your wish, my master?
Would you be so kind as
to get rid of thesepests?
whoosh
This is so gross.
Hey, look, the Bean dude's gone!
'I'm afraid now
with the treasure'
of the Blind Swordsman
he will be even more
difficult to stop.
So what wise saying
do you have for us?
I have none.
Come on, Master Fung,
I'm sure you can whip out
one of those old cheesy sayings.
That we all love
listening to..
I'm afraid I'm out
of old cheesy sayings.
Now, if you want
I can bring your file.
Duh, not that
you'd keep such a file.
I mean, they just
come to you. Right?
'I have decided to send
you to a new temple.'
One better equipped
in preparing you
to face Hannibal Bean.
Dojo will accompany you.
You're sending me away!
Away, away!
Is it because
of the secret file slip?
I assure you that I will
be here when you get back.
That's what my last master
said when he went for a soda
and never returned!
I don't wanna go.
Please, don't make me go.
Strong little lizard.
- Urgh!
- It's okay.
- Let go.
- Come, Dojo.
Are you doing this
because I like polka music?
Because I can change.
Just don't send me away!
crash
Nice view!
You know, when picking a temple
it's all about location,
location, location.
Master Monk Guan!
- How's it hanging, dude?
- Now I'll be a goat's nanny.
I can't believe it.
This is your temple?
That is correct.
Welcome, young monks.
Please come inside.
Don't worry, you'll always
be number one with me. Mwah.
Please take our guests'
belongings to their quarters.
Hey! He stays.
Your training
will begin tomorrow.
You may take the rest
of the day to relax.
I've prepared a meal for you.
Eat and sleep,
my kind of training.
Last one in is a rotten egg!
Yeah!
chomp chomp chomp
Hey, save somethin' for us.
At the end of your training
one of you will be chosen
to challenge Hannibal Bean.
And win back the treasure
of the Blind Swordsman.
I will try to appear
most surprised when I am picked.
But to succeed,
you must remain alert.
Hannibal is out there and always
closer than anyone thinks.
That old man has..
Up and at 'em! Training
out front in five minutes!
- Aaah!
- 'Move it!'
Oh-h, must be a bad dream.
That means you too,
young prince, move it
move it, move it!
I am tough but I am fair.
All I ask is for you
to do exactly as I say.
And never, ever
ask any questions.
Do I make myself clear?
Yes, Master Monk Guan!
Good. Now, any questions?
Have you lost your mind?
What did I say about questions?
- Drop and give me 20!
- Yeah. One-one, one-two..
I can't hear you!
One-one, one-two, one-three
one-four, one-five..
Your time with Master Fung
has made you soft.
But I will make you strong!
Now, let's start with
a five-mile run before we train.
O-oh!
Oh!
'Now, to the kitchen
for your chores!'
Wudai Neptune, water!
splash
Wudai Star, wind!
whoosh
Wudai Mars, fire!
Wudai Crater, Earth!
'We don't have all day.'
When you are done,
you can wash them once more
before nightfall.
But they're already clean
enough to eat off of, see?
That sounded like a question!
147, 148..
Nose to the ground!
Now, what? One, two..
splash
clank clank clank
whoosh
clank
whoosh
Break time!
Master Monk Guan said
we're not allowed to quit
until we fall down.
Well, you're not exactly
on his good side, partner.
Yeah, well, I don't care
what he thinks.
How much worse can he make it?
'Was that a question?'
No! I mean, yes, but..
Hey, I can ask them
questions, can't I? Oops!
Since Raimundo insists
on behaving like a clown
he should have a clown's name.
He will be called Bobo.
Bobo?
You lookin' at me, Bobo?
You can always quit
and leave now!
No, you can't do that.
I got no place to go!
I do not know what to say.
But I am most sorryBobo!
He he he he!
I've never seen this side
of Master Monk Guan before.
He kind of reminds me ofme!
Spear of Guan!
Big Bang Meteorang!
clang
Arrow Sparrow!
kaboom
Yeah!
Poor Raimundo.
There must be
something we can do
to make our
little Bobo feel better.
Well, we could start
by not calling him Bobo.
whoosh
Master Monk Guan,
we need to talk.
About Rai.
We just don't think
he has been given a fair shake.
- Sir!
- I see.
And I agree.
Bobo has failed us.
Because we have failed Bobo.
When one of us fails,
we all fail.
And I do not tolerate failure!
But that is not what we meant.
Since Bobo cannot
learn on his own
I will place him under
the care of my best student
'Omi.'
Yes!
I mean, I'm pleased
to be the best.
Not for your humiliation, Bobo.
Omi will teach you everything.
How to dress, how to eat
and how to sleep.
But Bobo knows
how to dress and eat.
And when it comes to sleeping
there is no one
who sleeps longer.
You're only making things worse.
I do not see
how that is possible.
From no on, when Bobo fails
he will not be punished.
You all will be punished.
What? Why should
they be punished for me?
Another question?
Drop and give me 50.
Come on.
One-one, one-two, one-three--
No! Stop it!
You don't have to worry
about me messing up anymore
because I quit!
Oh!I almost feel
pity for the poor boy.
Well, almost.
'My poor, dear boy!'
'There's no excuse for
how you've been treated..'
bullied and humiliated.
Have you been spying on me?
I've been watching over.
Sort of like a guardian angel.
That's creepy.
Your friends did nothing
when you needed them the most.
I don't need anyone.
Everyone needs a friend.
And I'd like to be yours.
I'm not that desperate.
Anywaywhat could you do?
I can help you get
what you want most..
evil.
Yeah!
I would like that.
Boy, you may still have
a dark future ahead of you.
Oh, yeah!
Oh, man!
Raimundo, what's going on?
Oh! That's what.
- Out of my way, gecko.
- Gecko?
Bobo, put down the Shen Gong Wu
and return to your room at once.
Hey, you're not my boss
anymore, Guano man.
This cannot be happening.
Our Bobo is turning
to the dark sideagain.
The name is Raimundo
not Bobo.
I cannot allow you
to do this to yourself.
Raimundo, what in the Sam Hill
are you doin'?
whoosh
We're your friends!
Yeah, yeah!
whoosh whoosh whoosh
I got all the friends
I need right here.
Come, my boy! Let's celebrate
our new partnership.
- Whoa!
- Shimo Staff!
Hi-yah!
Raimundo, gather the Wu
while the Blind Swordsman
entertains our friends.
whoosh whoosh
boom
Big Bang Meteorang!
clang
Arrow Sparrow!
pew pew
splat splat
crash
Raimundo, I challenge you
to a Xiaolin Showdown.
You're on, my Fancy Feet
against your..
what do you have left?
One second, please.
Aahh!
chomp chomp
The Gills ofHamachi.
The game will be
called Xiaolin Sparring.
Last monk standing wins.
With only
the Gills of Hamachi..
Omi doesn't stand a chance.
Let's go, Xiaolin Showdown!
Time to do what I do best.
Kick round butt.
I would not count my butts
before they hatch.
Gong Yi Tan Pai!
splat
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
splash
Fancy Feet!
Poor little Omi's
gettin' kicked around
like a pigskin
at a football game.
Nothing I enjoy more,
than a one-sided battle.
Omi, I know you can win.
I have trained you.
Remember, the fate of the world
'lies in your hands.'
Wudai Neptune, water!
Whoa!
Gills of Hamachi!
splash
Wudai Star, wind!
crash
Poor little guy's
like a fish out of water.
Perhaps you would like
to increase our wager?
In the middle of a showdown?
Okay, we got an official
time-out here.
According to the rule book
that changes like the seasons
one side can go all in
by calling
a Shen Yi Bu all in.
Wow, pretty high stakes.
I will wager
all of our Shen Gong Wu
against the ones you stole.
And the treasure
of the Blind Swordsman.
Not sure..
if that is..
..a wise wager.
I reckon there may be
some wisdom to those words.
I accept your wager.
Your misguided faith
in the cheeseball is touchin'.
End it nowbut make it sting.
Oh, I'll make it sting alright.
Looks like you win.
N-o-o-o!
I was cheated, cheated!
- Way to go, Omi.
- Whoo-wee, yeah!
How did you do it?
I have no idea.
I was cheated, cheated, cheated.
According to the rule book,
it's legal.
In technical terms, it's called
a Xiaolin Showdown Dive.
I assure you,
you have not heard the last
of Hannibal Roy Bean.
Especially you, Raimundo.
Buzz off, Bean breath.
Phoo!
You did well, Raimundo.
As I had expected you would do.
You mean, this thing
between you and Raimundo
was all an act?
Just a little con that me
and the Guan meister worked up.
Well, how come you left
us out in the cold?
I knew Bean would be watching.
If I said anything,
he would've known.
So all along Raimundo
was the one to be chosen?
And notme?
Omi, you have many talents.
But I needed someone
with special skills.
Someone dark, ruthless
shady, rebellious.
Hey, thanks a lot.
I'm just glad to do my part.
Well, looks like
we're gonna need more bandages
or you're gonna need
a smaller head.
Sorry about the butt-kicking.
But I had to make it look good.
I understand.
You did it for a good cause.
And I hope one day,
I can return the favor.
'Raimundo..'
for a job well done
I want you to have this.
Wow, no way!
The Spear of Guan.
swish swish swish
I do not understand.
You gave me
the Spear of Guan.
Well, it's not exactly
the only one I have.
They're numbered.
Three hundred eighty-four
is one of my favorites.
Yah, hah, wah, woo!
'Three eighty-four, baby!'
Xiaolin Showdown
Xiaolin Showdown
The Fancy Feet
is no ordinary Wu.
'Whoever posses the Wu'
'can move faster than
anything in the world.'
'It's quiet handy
when chasing an evil doer'
'or running away
from a bully half your size.'
I've always
wanted Fancy Feet.
Hey, I would settle
for just feet.
Guys, we got Wu at 5 o'clock.
Ying Yang, looks like
we have unwelcome company.
Looks like
we're gonna kick Bean butt.
He he. You don't think I'd be
so foolish as to comealone.
Whoa!
It is the Blind Swordsman.
What is your wish, my master?
Would you be so kind as
to get rid of thesepests?
whoosh
This is so gross.
Hey, look, the Bean dude's gone!
'I'm afraid now
with the treasure'
of the Blind Swordsman
he will be even more
difficult to stop.
So what wise saying
do you have for us?
I have none.
Come on, Master Fung,
I'm sure you can whip out
one of those old cheesy sayings.
That we all love
listening to..
I'm afraid I'm out
of old cheesy sayings.
Now, if you want
I can bring your file.
Duh, not that
you'd keep such a file.
I mean, they just
come to you. Right?
'I have decided to send
you to a new temple.'
One better equipped
in preparing you
to face Hannibal Bean.
Dojo will accompany you.
You're sending me away!
Away, away!
Is it because
of the secret file slip?
I assure you that I will
be here when you get back.
That's what my last master
said when he went for a soda
and never returned!
I don't wanna go.
Please, don't make me go.
Strong little lizard.
- Urgh!
- It's okay.
- Let go.
- Come, Dojo.
Are you doing this
because I like polka music?
Because I can change.
Just don't send me away!
crash
Nice view!
You know, when picking a temple
it's all about location,
location, location.
Master Monk Guan!
- How's it hanging, dude?
- Now I'll be a goat's nanny.
I can't believe it.
This is your temple?
That is correct.
Welcome, young monks.
Please come inside.
Don't worry, you'll always
be number one with me. Mwah.
Please take our guests'
belongings to their quarters.
Hey! He stays.
Your training
will begin tomorrow.
You may take the rest
of the day to relax.
I've prepared a meal for you.
Eat and sleep,
my kind of training.
Last one in is a rotten egg!
Yeah!
chomp chomp chomp
Hey, save somethin' for us.
At the end of your training
one of you will be chosen
to challenge Hannibal Bean.
And win back the treasure
of the Blind Swordsman.
I will try to appear
most surprised when I am picked.
But to succeed,
you must remain alert.
Hannibal is out there and always
closer than anyone thinks.
That old man has..
Up and at 'em! Training
out front in five minutes!
- Aaah!
- 'Move it!'
Oh-h, must be a bad dream.
That means you too,
young prince, move it
move it, move it!
I am tough but I am fair.
All I ask is for you
to do exactly as I say.
And never, ever
ask any questions.
Do I make myself clear?
Yes, Master Monk Guan!
Good. Now, any questions?
Have you lost your mind?
What did I say about questions?
- Drop and give me 20!
- Yeah. One-one, one-two..
I can't hear you!
One-one, one-two, one-three
one-four, one-five..
Your time with Master Fung
has made you soft.
But I will make you strong!
Now, let's start with
a five-mile run before we train.
O-oh!
Oh!
'Now, to the kitchen
for your chores!'
Wudai Neptune, water!
splash
Wudai Star, wind!
whoosh
Wudai Mars, fire!
Wudai Crater, Earth!
'We don't have all day.'
When you are done,
you can wash them once more
before nightfall.
But they're already clean
enough to eat off of, see?
That sounded like a question!
147, 148..
Nose to the ground!
Now, what? One, two..
splash
clank clank clank
whoosh
clank
whoosh
Break time!
Master Monk Guan said
we're not allowed to quit
until we fall down.
Well, you're not exactly
on his good side, partner.
Yeah, well, I don't care
what he thinks.
How much worse can he make it?
'Was that a question?'
No! I mean, yes, but..
Hey, I can ask them
questions, can't I? Oops!
Since Raimundo insists
on behaving like a clown
he should have a clown's name.
He will be called Bobo.
Bobo?
You lookin' at me, Bobo?
You can always quit
and leave now!
No, you can't do that.
I got no place to go!
I do not know what to say.
But I am most sorryBobo!
He he he he!
I've never seen this side
of Master Monk Guan before.
He kind of reminds me ofme!
Spear of Guan!
Big Bang Meteorang!
clang
Arrow Sparrow!
kaboom
Yeah!
Poor Raimundo.
There must be
something we can do
to make our
little Bobo feel better.
Well, we could start
by not calling him Bobo.
whoosh
Master Monk Guan,
we need to talk.
About Rai.
We just don't think
he has been given a fair shake.
- Sir!
- I see.
And I agree.
Bobo has failed us.
Because we have failed Bobo.
When one of us fails,
we all fail.
And I do not tolerate failure!
But that is not what we meant.
Since Bobo cannot
learn on his own
I will place him under
the care of my best student
'Omi.'
Yes!
I mean, I'm pleased
to be the best.
Not for your humiliation, Bobo.
Omi will teach you everything.
How to dress, how to eat
and how to sleep.
But Bobo knows
how to dress and eat.
And when it comes to sleeping
there is no one
who sleeps longer.
You're only making things worse.
I do not see
how that is possible.
From no on, when Bobo fails
he will not be punished.
You all will be punished.
What? Why should
they be punished for me?
Another question?
Drop and give me 50.
Come on.
One-one, one-two, one-three--
No! Stop it!
You don't have to worry
about me messing up anymore
because I quit!
Oh!I almost feel
pity for the poor boy.
Well, almost.
'My poor, dear boy!'
'There's no excuse for
how you've been treated..'
bullied and humiliated.
Have you been spying on me?
I've been watching over.
Sort of like a guardian angel.
That's creepy.
Your friends did nothing
when you needed them the most.
I don't need anyone.
Everyone needs a friend.
And I'd like to be yours.
I'm not that desperate.
Anywaywhat could you do?
I can help you get
what you want most..
evil.
Yeah!
I would like that.
Boy, you may still have
a dark future ahead of you.
Oh, yeah!
Oh, man!
Raimundo, what's going on?
Oh! That's what.
- Out of my way, gecko.
- Gecko?
Bobo, put down the Shen Gong Wu
and return to your room at once.
Hey, you're not my boss
anymore, Guano man.
This cannot be happening.
Our Bobo is turning
to the dark sideagain.
The name is Raimundo
not Bobo.
I cannot allow you
to do this to yourself.
Raimundo, what in the Sam Hill
are you doin'?
whoosh
We're your friends!
Yeah, yeah!
whoosh whoosh whoosh
I got all the friends
I need right here.
Come, my boy! Let's celebrate
our new partnership.
- Whoa!
- Shimo Staff!
Hi-yah!
Raimundo, gather the Wu
while the Blind Swordsman
entertains our friends.
whoosh whoosh
boom
Big Bang Meteorang!
clang
Arrow Sparrow!
pew pew
splat splat
crash
Raimundo, I challenge you
to a Xiaolin Showdown.
You're on, my Fancy Feet
against your..
what do you have left?
One second, please.
Aahh!
chomp chomp
The Gills ofHamachi.
The game will be
called Xiaolin Sparring.
Last monk standing wins.
With only
the Gills of Hamachi..
Omi doesn't stand a chance.
Let's go, Xiaolin Showdown!
Time to do what I do best.
Kick round butt.
I would not count my butts
before they hatch.
Gong Yi Tan Pai!
splat
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
Fancy Feet!
splash
Fancy Feet!
Poor little Omi's
gettin' kicked around
like a pigskin
at a football game.
Nothing I enjoy more,
than a one-sided battle.
Omi, I know you can win.
I have trained you.
Remember, the fate of the world
'lies in your hands.'
Wudai Neptune, water!
Whoa!
Gills of Hamachi!
splash
Wudai Star, wind!
crash
Poor little guy's
like a fish out of water.
Perhaps you would like
to increase our wager?
In the middle of a showdown?
Okay, we got an official
time-out here.
According to the rule book
that changes like the seasons
one side can go all in
by calling
a Shen Yi Bu all in.
Wow, pretty high stakes.
I will wager
all of our Shen Gong Wu
against the ones you stole.
And the treasure
of the Blind Swordsman.
Not sure..
if that is..
..a wise wager.
I reckon there may be
some wisdom to those words.
I accept your wager.
Your misguided faith
in the cheeseball is touchin'.
End it nowbut make it sting.
Oh, I'll make it sting alright.
Looks like you win.
N-o-o-o!
I was cheated, cheated!
- Way to go, Omi.
- Whoo-wee, yeah!
How did you do it?
I have no idea.
I was cheated, cheated, cheated.
According to the rule book,
it's legal.
In technical terms, it's called
a Xiaolin Showdown Dive.
I assure you,
you have not heard the last
of Hannibal Roy Bean.
Especially you, Raimundo.
Buzz off, Bean breath.
Phoo!
You did well, Raimundo.
As I had expected you would do.
You mean, this thing
between you and Raimundo
was all an act?
Just a little con that me
and the Guan meister worked up.
Well, how come you left
us out in the cold?
I knew Bean would be watching.
If I said anything,
he would've known.
So all along Raimundo
was the one to be chosen?
And notme?
Omi, you have many talents.
But I needed someone
with special skills.
Someone dark, ruthless
shady, rebellious.
Hey, thanks a lot.
I'm just glad to do my part.
Well, looks like
we're gonna need more bandages
or you're gonna need
a smaller head.
Sorry about the butt-kicking.
But I had to make it look good.
I understand.
You did it for a good cause.
And I hope one day,
I can return the favor.
'Raimundo..'
for a job well done
I want you to have this.
Wow, no way!
The Spear of Guan.
swish swish swish
I do not understand.
You gave me
the Spear of Guan.
Well, it's not exactly
the only one I have.
They're numbered.
Three hundred eighty-four
is one of my favorites.
Yah, hah, wah, woo!
'Three eighty-four, baby!'