Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) s03e08 Episode Script

And you will look forward to the morning when you will awaken from a good night's sleep, bring your ID and your Number 2 pencils and arrive at your SAT testing site approximately 20 minutes before the test begins.
Why, so we can worry for an extra 20 minutes? No, so you don't have to worry about being late on top of everything else.
Relax, Eraserhead, you're a junior.
Come on, it's a piece of cake.
Yeah, well, If it's so easy, why are you all in here taking your SATs again? I want you to simply bring yourself back to the sound of my voice saying, "S.
D.
S.
M.
" Scan, discard, select, move on.
Scan, discard, select, move on.
- on my SAT test.
Boring, huh? Excuse me, we're from KTMB-TV.
Would any of you be willing to talk to us about the pressures you're feeling getting ready for the college entrance exams? - What's going on? - Oh, it's just the local news.
- pressure to get the highest possible scores.
These courses make us feel like at least we have The hell it is.
I'm gonna try and see if I can improve my scores the second time around.
- Hey.
- Steve, what are you doing? Can I have my mike back, please? - Why should I? - Steve.
Don't you know who these people are, Brenda? Did you ever hear of a sleazy TV show called Back Story? It's a junk-a-thon news magazine that goes out of its way to ruin people's lives on national TV.
Look, that is not true.
What about the story you ran on Samantha Sanders? Hey, I'm new on the show.
Don't try to weasel out of it.
That was a hatchet job if ever I've seen a hatchet job.
Steve, let's just get out of here.
Come on, man, don't waste your breath.
- Really.
- My mike, please? Thanks.
Next time, I'll break it.
And your camera too.
Samantha Sanders is his mom.
He's very protective of her.
I can see that.
Well, Brenda, good luck on your test.
Thanks.
Hey, buddy, I heard you whaled on some unsuspecting newswoman last night.
Don't get me started.
Brenda said you were just releasing some pent-up sexual tension.
Give me a break, okay? Oh, well, speaking of pent-up, there's some sweet young thing who has her eye on you.
Nikki Witt? Oh, try not to show so much enthusiasm.
She's a sophomore.
So you got some age-bias thing going here? No, I got no age-bias thing going here.
But let's not forget, this is the girl who was throwing herself at young David Silver.
- Now, maybe you're hard up.
- Hi, Steve.
- Hey, Suds.
How are you doing? - Great.
- So we're still on for tonight, right? - Eight o'clock, Peach Pit.
- Great.
Bye, Brandon.
- Bye.
Well, I guess Brenda was wrong.
No flies on you.
No Suds on me, either.
She's B.
J.
Harrison's girlfriend.
He'll be sitting between us.
Aren't there enough college girls in the world that these guys don't have to come back and raid our class? - Bran, she's a junior.
- A junior? Don't you know girls mature faster than guys? Not in my house, they don't.
- Oh, I really need a cigarette.
- You're really hooked now, aren't you? I am not.
It's just that I'm a little stressed out with these SATs and everything else going on.
So you wanna add radiology treatments to your busy schedule.
Kelly, I don't smoke that much.
A few measly puffs is not gonna give me lung cancer.
Did you know that smoking increases your stress level? Why don't you just lighten up? If your parents knew, they would flip out.
Yeah, well, so would Dylan.
He hates smoking with a passion.
But fortunately, he loves the smell of perfume.
Don't say anything, okay? - Whatever.
- And don't say goodbye either.
- Hey.
- Hi.
Since you're technically still my senior buddy, - can I ask you a question? - Sure.
Why is everyone so rattled around here? - It's not even a full moon.
- The SATs are this Saturday.
Oh, that's what's going on with Brandon.
No, actually, he and Andrea are the only ones I know who aren't taking the SAT again.
Well, then, what's his story? I mean, he's so serious all the time.
That's just at school.
At the Peach Pit, he is a completely different person.
Thanks for the tip.
Well, once a buddy, always a buddy.
Brenda, I was hoping I'd find you.
- You got a minute? - Sure.
I want you to know, I had nothing to do with that smear on your friend's mom.
You came all the way here just to tell me that? Can we go somewhere and talk? Believe me, working for Back Story was not where I thought I'd end up after journalism school.
But jobs are hard to come by.
Well, I guess you gotta do what you gotta do.
Well, I still think I can do the kind of quality work that bucks convention and breaks down the stereotypes.
But I need your help.
- Beth, I don't know.
- It's a natural, come on.
"Stay tuned for the back-story on the kids that go to high school in the most glamorous city in America.
" How is that gonna break down any stereotypes? Because I'm not gonna do a generic profile of the blond bimbette on Rodeo Drive with her daddy's gold card.
What interests me is that you and your friends are just a bunch of ordinary kids living in an extraordinary community.
Yeah, I guess Beverly Hills can take some getting used to.
Which is a lot easier if you get past the surface glitz and look at the difference between what's real and what's hype.
Right? Do you have another cigarette? So when did you start smoking? I was in Paris for the summer.
Everybody was doing it.
I started my senior year too.
Actually, your friends remind me of the crowd I used to hang out with in high school.
We're still really close.
So, what do you say? Well Do I get to be on camera? There you go, man.
B.
J.
, Steve called, he's running late as usual.
- No sweat.
- How's college treating you? Okay? - I'm learning the ropes.
- Good deal.
Here you go.
Brandon, I need to talk to you.
How much perfume are you wearing? Listen, can we go sit down for a minute? Brandon, order's up.
I can't right now.
Bren, what's the matter? - It's nothing, it's just - Brando.
- Look, you go ahead.
I'll wait.
- Thanks.
- Hey, Brandon.
- Stevie, your date's right over there.
Nice perfume you're wearing.
Sir, your order will be right up.
Here you go and here you go.
Orders up on 11 and 14.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Brandon.
Hi.
Wow, I didn't know you worked here.
- What a - Brandon.
Excuse me.
- surprise.
Hey, B, do you got any old term papers lying around collecting dust? I might.
I thought senior year would be a breeze, but they're just piling on the work.
It's funny you should say that, Steve.
That's kind of why I'm here.
I'm about to make your life.
What is that? The key to your heart? No, this is the master key to West Beverly High.
It unlocks every office, every filing cabinet, every grade bank.
Think of the possibilities, Steve-o.
Yeah, right.
Hey, this isn't a trick, Sanders.
This key is a legacy that's been passed down year after year to the one student who's lucky enough to carry on the tradition.
And now it's your turn.
Where'd you get it? I'm not gonna tell you that.
And you'll never say where you got it, right? Why me, B.
J.
? I just wanna make sure you wind up in my frat someday.
I don't know.
Hey, look, Steve, you don't want it? I'll find someone else who does.
I didn't say I don't want it.
I could get into a lot of trouble with that key.
Okay, look, you need a little time to think it over.
You got till the weekend.
And for once in your life, Sanders, try not to be a jerk.
So I've got three orders up, and she just keeps saying, "I can't decide.
" I mean, either you like vanilla or chocolate, am I right? Why don't you just ask Nikki out and get it over with? I don't know.
She makes me nervous.
Well, maybe you make her nervous.
I just wish I could make her a little older, you know? She seems so innocent.
Appearances can be deceiving.
Very deep, Bren.
Very deep.
- Can we go now? - Sure.
Look, I know that Back Story has a bad reputation, but Beth only wants to do the story if it's from my point of view.
I'm sure that's exactly what they told Samantha Sanders.
Well, I don't know anything about that, Brandon.
But Beth is the field producer, and she controls what goes into the piece.
- I mean, isn't that how it works? - Yeah.
Still, I'd check with Mrs.
Teasley first.
Why do I need her permission? You know how image-conscious the school district is, especially when it comes to the media.
Why do you wanna do this thing? Well, I wanna help Beth.
What is she, your new best friend? As opposed to my old non-friends? What's that supposed to mean? I don't know.
Ever since I got back from Europe, I feel like I'm not on the same wavelength with anybody.
I mean, Donna's off doing her thing with David, and Kelly's been so moody lately, it's like I can't say anything right.
If it weren't for Dylan, I wouldn't have anyone.
- Excuse me.
- Present company excluded.
Thank you.
I don't know, I mean, at the very least, I have the opportunity to make a positive statement about what it's really like to grow up in Beverly Hills.
Still, check with Mrs.
Teasley before you get into it.
Hey, Dad, what's up? Going out someplace, big guy? Yes, if your mother ever finds the address.
How are you guys? - Great.
- Beat.
- All set.
- Finally.
I'm starved.
- Don't study too hard.
- She will.
Well, don't party too hard.
- See you later.
- Good night.
This is the thanks we get for sending you to Paris? Everybody smokes in Paris.
Well, no one smokes in this house.
It's that simple.
I don't know anyone who smokes anymore.
It really is a disgusting habit, Bren.
Look, I've only smoked a couple of times.
I don't even inhale hardly.
So you can all stop worrying.
Aren't there health hazards that we can't control, without you voluntarily adding another? Dad, if I can survive the smog in the air, the pesticides in my food and the crime in the streets, then I am bound to beat the odds on a couple of lousy cigarettes.
Don't dare make light of this.
Mom, I'm sorry.
I just think you're all overreacting.
Well, then you have a short memory.
Think back to when you had to see Dr.
Donner about that lump in your breast.
Do we have to refresh your memory about this family's history when it comes to cancer? - No.
- Okay, okay, okay, listen.
So she lost her perspective over there with the Frenchies this summer.
- That's fine.
But now that she's back - Brandon.
Please shut up.
Do any of your friends smoke? No, Dad, and I don't either.
I mean, somebody gave me that pack.
In fact, I can quit anytime.
Well, in that case, now is just as good a time as any, right? No problem.
- "Assuage.
" - To lessen the intensity of.
"Vitiate.
" - Pass.
Next word.
- What do you mean, "Pass"? What do you think this is, a game show? I wish it was.
Oh, yes, Donna Martin, you get this one right, you can win the grand-prize trip to study hall.
Applause from the audience.
Thank you.
Look, they're at it again.
Can't you be sympathetic to what I'm going through? I mean, you sound disappointed that I wasn't grounded.
All I'm saying is I'm glad your parents caught you.
Can you please keep your voice down? It's too late for that.
What did they catch you doing this time? - Because I know I wasn't involved.
- It was nothing.
Brenda, if you don't tell me, Kelly will.
My parents found a pack of cigarettes that somebody gave me and they went ballistic.
They wouldn't believe that they weren't mine.
Bren, that's because nonsmokers don't usually carry cigarettes.
You don't believe me either? Great.
Brenda, the only thing worse than having an addiction is denying that you have one.
- Kelly, please don't get all AA on me.
- Fine.
I quit, okay? Whether I was ever officially a smoker, I am now a nonsmoker.
End of discussion.
What I'd like to talk about is what time you're picking me up Saturday.
We should get there 20 minutes before the test starts.
Actually, there's been a change of plans.
I'm gonna go to West Lompoc to see my dad.
What about the SAT? - Take them next time.
- Dylan, that's what you said last time.
You're gonna miss the college application deadlines.
So those are the breaks.
You are so frustrating.
It's not written in stone that everybody has to go right to college - after they graduate from high school.
- Thank you.
Thanks, Kel.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I saw you guys watching us.
Did you work everything out? Oh, yeah, everything's just groovy.
David, did you remember to bring the video scrapbook I asked for? Oh, yeah, sure.
I hope your friend gets a kick out of it.
You know, I hate seeing you and Kelly fighting all the time.
Yeah, well, tell it to Kelly.
I was hoping it was you.
I brought you the yearbook and the video scrapbook that a friend of mine made.
It's actually pretty good.
Most of it's in focus.
Fantastic.
This is gonna be a dynamite segment.
One more thing.
Before you start, you need to get permission from Mrs.
Teasley.
- Who? - Our vice principal.
Oh, okay, whatever's standard.
But I think I'm gonna put the piece together, let her see it first and then make up her mind.
You're the reporter.
Bye.
Where are you going? Wait a second.
I have to get back to class.
Oh, I wanted you to go over this stuff with us.
At least let me introduce you to my supervising producer.
Come on.
- Want one? - No, thanks.
Dan will be off in a minute.
Wow, you have, like, a whole command post set up here, don't you? Yeah, Back Story has 15 mobile units around the country.
We can edit right in here.
It gives us a lot of options.
Well, now, I have the back-story on Back Story.
You sure you can't stay and help me? Well, maybe just for a minute.
So Mr.
Meyers wants to see the proofs by tomorrow.
- No problem.
- And another thing.
We were talking about getting a rep from each grade on the Blaze staff.
Yeah, I think it's a good idea.
Well, I think we found our first volunteer in the sophomore class.
Hi, guys.
Brandon, you know Nikki, don't you? Yes, we've met.
Several times.
Brenda, I'd even share my clothes with you if it meant that you'd stay.
- She struck me as kind of an airhead.
- No, she's not.
In fact, Donna and I were in a French immersion programme in Paris this summer.
And by the end of it, she was speaking Well, she had really, really improved.
So she's partial airhead.
No, Donna has a learning disability.
But she's not letting that stop her from taking her SATs.
And she's the sweetest person I know.
And well-dressed.
Yeah, she is a total clotheshorse.
Although, she's not quite as bad as Kelly.
Kelly.
- Now, Kelly is the other blond.
- Right.
And what's she like? Well, when I first met her, I thought she was the typical Beverly Hills snob.
You know, nose job, Beemer and an attitude.
She's become one of my best friends.
I really admire her.
- And why is that? - She's totally turned her life around.
Before I moved here, she was, shall we say, pretty loose? And now? She's completely changed.
I feel sorry for her, though.
A lot of people can't get past her looks and see what a smart and loving and caring person she really is.
You know what? You're really good at this.
Thanks.
Can I have one of those? Sure, help yourself.
- Mrs.
T, how you be? - I'd be fine if a certain senior didn't park his car in the faculty parking lot.
- Well - Steve, next time, I tow it.
- Mrs.
Teasley, how's it going? - B.
J.
, to what do we owe this honour? Please don't treat him like royalty.
It goes straight to his head.
Well, you don't make dean's list and boys' honour society three terms in a row unless your feet are planted on the ground.
Or unless you're just lucky.
- How are you doing, Steve? - Well, not as good as you, I guess.
And so, America, you might think that the kids that live in Beverly Hills must be some alien life form.
But if you stop and look at somebody like me, for example, I have a head, two arms, two legs.
I have two parents, who've been married to each other for almost 20 years.
That isn't typical, is it? I'm from Minnesota, remember? - Okay, cut.
- Was that okay? That was great.
Better than I ever could have hoped for.
Oh, my God.
I can't believe how late it is.
I guess I totally blew off school.
I'm sorry, Brenda.
It's okay, it was for a good cause.
You don't have a spare toothbrush by any chance, do you? No, sorry.
- Hey.
- Sorry I'm late.
I didn't think you were gonna come at all.
- Yeah, and did you miss me? - Yeah.
Come here.
Babe, I can tell you brushed your teeth, but you still reek of cigarette smoke.
Well, I was in a confined space with a lot of smokers.
Bren, I have never had a long-term relationship with a smoker.
I don't intend to start now.
Fair enough.
Tell you what.
I'll quit smoking forever, on one condition.
And what might that be? That you take your SATs this Saturday.
Dylan, just consider it.
Deal.
I'll consider it.
Now you come here.
Not until you get out of those smoke-ridden clothes.
You just wanna see me slip into something more comfortable.
Absolutely.
Yeah, that part's no good anyway.
It's really overwritten.
- That's the part I liked.
- Yeah? Well, it's stylized.
It's sort of a cafeteria stream-of-consciousness sort of thing.
Listen, Nikki, I'm not giving this the full attention it deserves right now.
Maybe we should give this to Andrea and see what she has to say.
- So you want me to come back later? - Yeah.
Okay.
Bye.
- Bye.
- Bye.
You know, it won't work, Brandon.
You can't just pawn her off on me.
Although what you have against her I don't quite understand.
- I mean, she's smart, adorable - All right.
Enough already.
Andrea, you like her so much, why don't you take her out? Look, if it's that bad, can I give you a word of advice? Nip it in the bud.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's no fun pining over someone who's not interested.
Brenda.
I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time.
Oh, well, we're still piecing the segment together.
- I'd invite you in, but - It's okay.
I have to get back to class.
I just need to return the video.
Okay.
Hold on, I'll get it for you.
Brenda Walsh is here.
What am I supposed to tell her? Tell her it's not gonna fly, unless you can come up with a better hook.
Where's the heat? Where's the: - That's not what I pitched.
- Well, that's what I need.
Dan, I promised her I wasn't gonna exploit these kids.
I hope you didn't put it in writing.
It's just not right.
Either you're gonna do it, or I am.
Here you go.
Thanks for all your help.
Thank you.
I can't wait to see it.
Bye.
Bye.
You mean Back Story is doing a piece on West Beverly High? We had to escort a cameraman off the premises.
And they have a Winnebago parked on Alcott Drive.
- So no one asked for permission? - No, they did not.
Probably because they knew we wouldn't give it to them.
So please, put an announcement in the paper that we don't want any students cooperating with these people.
No problem.
We can squeeze into this issue.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
I hate tabloid journalists.
They are the sleaziest.
What's wrong? I gotta go talk to Brenda.
- Steve, Steve, you seen Brenda? - No.
I hope everything's okay.
Do you think he works too hard? I love new art supplies.
They're so clean.
- Hey, you guys seen Brenda? - Haven't had the pleasure.
Brenda and Kelly haven't been getting along so well lately.
Hey, Brandon, where's your sister, man? I was just about to ask you the same thing.
I wanted to say goodbye before I left for Santa Maria.
Going to see your old man? Yeah.
Oh, by the way, this girl, she was asking me about you.
Her name is Nikki Witt? That girl.
She wanted to know if you had any hobbies or anything.
So I told her how much you like to knit.
Thanks, buddy.
Tell Bren I'll be back Sunday.
I'll see her then.
Aren't the SATs on Saturday? Yeah, but, you know, college isn't really where my head's at.
I know, but there is something to be said for keeping options open.
Same can be said for you.
- Tell Nikki I said hi.
- I'll do that.
- Hello? - Mom, listen, did Brenda? - What's wrong? - Nothing, nothing.
Was Brenda expecting me to give her a ride home from school today? Do you know? Because I have some things I have to do.
No, she was gonna study all day in the library because the SATs are tomorrow.
Thanks, Mom.
Is everything all right? Yes.
Yes.
Everything is all right, thank you very much.
And everything will remain fine whether you're hanging out here asking me about it, hanging around the newsroom, dropping by the Peach Pit, or whatever else you happen to be doing, everything will be just fine.
Look.
Look, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I have nothing against you personally, I don't.
It's just I've had a lot on my mind lately.
No, wait, that's not even it.
Look.
It just wouldn't work out, that's all.
We're completely different people.
The odds are stacked against us, if you know what I'm saying.
It's just the way I feel, I'm sorry.
Wait, I think I've missed a vital part of this conversation.
Can we go back? All I said was, "Is everything okay?" And you told me that it was, and I'm happy to hear it.
I've just been a little distracted.
Bye, Brandon.
- What are you doing here? - I don't give you advice that often, so when I do, do me a favour and take it, okay? Fine, thanks.
How are you? I was better before Mrs.
Teasley came in with an edict from the school board about Back Story.
Didn't I tell you to get permission? The show's going to take care of all that.
They're going through channels.
What did you tell these people? Brandon, I think that you should just relax.
Let me get back to the one thing I do have to worry about, which is the SATs.
Man, what a miserable day.
I spend all afternoon looking for Brenda to keep her out of hot water, and when I finally track her down, her response is, "Go away, Brandon, I'm busy.
" Brenda can take care of herself.
The counter's filling up, Brandon.
Come on.
I'll be there.
I wish this job could take care of itself.
Or that paper that's due on Monday I haven't started yet.
What would you do if someone offered to make your life a little easier, at least in the academic department? I'd say, "How much and where do I sign?" Well, you've gotta swear on your parents' grave that what I'm about to tell you, no one will ever know.
How about just a simple promise? Someone offered to give me the master key to the school.
What do you mean the master key? It's been handed down from student to student for years.
It opens up every office, every filing cabinet, every grade bank.
And you have this key? Let's just say there's a window of opportunity that's available to me, or us, if you're into it.
Well, I guess things have come full circle.
We became friends in Mr.
Danzel's history class, when you were only interested in tests you already knew the questions to.
- Well, that sure backfired.
- What makes you think this won't? Steve, the way I look at it, anything you can't do out in the open ain't worth doing.
You'll get into SC, man.
If I don't blow it.
Yeah, but you don't need a scam.
What do you wanna be? You wanna be big man on campus with a huge GPA, who's always worried about getting busted? Or would you rather be a guy who can sleep at night, knowing he's doing the best he can? You always bring out the Boy Scout in me, Walsh.
That's why I'm here.
Come on.
- Well, speak of the devil.
- We were just watching the news, when they started promoting a segment on Back Story on growing up in Beverly Hills.
They're running it tonight? What did they say? "Rich and spoiled in Beverly Hills.
The back-story on the teenage inhabitants - of the glamorous city on earth.
" - "Rich and spoiled"? When you hear the name "Beverly Hills," you think of swimming pools, movie stars, the lifestyles of the rich and richer.
A golden fantasyland of palatial estates and world-class everything.
And the pride of this community is West Beverly Hills High School, where the princes and princesses go to school in their Porsches and convertibles, their designer clothes and their all-American smiles.
Look, there's Kelly.
And Donna.
And Steve.
But at Back Story, we found that these children of privilege have nothing to be smiling about.
For it's a sad fact that all the money in the world can't compensate for the breakdown of family values that we found in our visit to this mecca.
Brenda, that's you.
I have two parents, who've been married to each other for almost 20 years.
That's not typical here, though, is it? I'm from Minnesota, remember? Brenda, when did you do this? I didn't say it that way.
I never even talked to that guy.
In Beverly Hills, you find the tragedy of dysfunctional families in the extreme.
There are the show-biz kids, whose parents are consumed by their own failing careers at the expense of their children's emotional stability.
This girl has a severe learning disability.
Her parents' solution? Send her to Paris on a whirlwind shopping spree.
That is so twisted.
I can't even watch this.
And then there's the girl with the reputation.
This girl found, at an early age, that in Beverly Hills, pretty young girls do exactly what they can for what they want.
- I'm ruined.
- Maybe no one's watching it.
With an absentee father and a no-limit credit card, and a mother who's battled the demons of drugs and alcohol most of her adult life, it's no wonder that this blond vixen has no moral foundation and a jaded, world-weary attitude.
Kelly's line is still busy.
Dad, can't we sue them? I don't know.
Maybe we should look into it.
Honey, I'm sure your friends will understand when you tell them that those people just distorted everything you said.
No, I never should have said anything in the first place.
I have to take a walk.
- You saw Back Story, huh? - Yeah, it was horrible.
Come on, I'll give you a ride home.
No, I just wanna walk for a while.
Want some company? That's okay.
What's up, Bren? Wanna be alone so you can have a smoke? Brandon, they made it seem like I said all those terrible things.
Nobody's ever gonna talk to me again.
I really need a cigarette.
Bren.
Seems to me if you can get through this without a cigarette, you can probably get through anything.
So you want chocolate sauce on this? No.
Three scoops, straight up.
Kelly's line is still busy.
Well, what about Donna? No answer.
You know, I wish I could get ahold of Beth Nielsen, break down some of her stereotypes.
Of course, she's not even listed.
Kelly, get off the phone.
Yeah, David, hi.
Is Kelly there? Yeah, but she doesn't wanna talk to you.
And frankly, neither do I.
Hey, Dad.
Hey, I didn't expect to see you till next weekend.
Yeah, I know.
You know, you told me how slow time passes here, so I picked up these books you wanted and I brought them up.
Well, yeah, time does go slowly here, but that's why I'm getting good at keeping dates in my head.
You got the SATs tomorrow.
So? Why did you wanna drive all the way up here and back? You ought to be getting a good night's sleep.
I just thought I'd check out the waves at Avila State Beach instead.
What? Don't tell me you're disappointed.
Well, what good is that gonna do, huh? I mean, if you wanna learn everything the hard way just like I did, you're entitled.
That's right, I am.
You just wanna wait around, hang out, until your trust fund matures? - Sounds good, huh? - Doesn't sound bad.
Then you got a wad of money in your pocket, and you think people will respect you.
Until the money runs out and you realise they don't.
That's right, I must have forgot who I was talking to.
You know everything about trying to buy respect, don't you, Dad? I mean, that's the reason for the big endowment to California University, wasn't it? That's right, Dylan.
That's exactly right.
And it didn't work.
Because deep inside, I knew I was a fraud.
Look, whether you go to college or not is your decision.
But if you bust your butt for four years and you get a degree, nobody can take that away from you.
You and Jim Walsh have the same speechwriter.
Look, I don't expect you to do anything just because I tell you to, but if you really want the respect of the Jim Walshes in this world, you better earn it.
I'll keep that in mind.
Look, Donna, you gotta stop thinking about that stupid show.
Now, if your mind starts drifting during the test, just remember what we learned: S.
D.
S.
M.
Scan, discard, select and move on.
Scan, discard, select and move on.
Hey.
Saw you guys on TV last night.
Miller, why don't you leave Kelly alone? She's had a hard enough time without your lip, okay? Hey, I'm not gonna dis her, man.
I'm just a little concerned about your emotional instability.
Get out of my space, butthead.
Donna, I tried to call you last night.
Scan, discard, select, move on.
Kelly, I know how mad you must be.
Please let me say something before we go in there.
Even though we've been fighting a lot lately, you have to know that I love you, and I would never have said those things about you on or off camera.
I mean, you have to believe me.
I feel terrible.
It's okay, Brenda.
I'm sure you needed to get that off your chest.
And now that you've done what you needed to do to feel better, I have a test to take.
Is it too late to sign up for the test? - Can I help you? - Is Brenda home? No, she's out all morning, taking her SATs.
Right, she told me.
I totally forgot.
And you are? Beth Nielsen.
The backstabber from Back Story.
What do you want with my sister? More gossip? Or have you come to finish her off? Listen, should I come back another time or will you take a message? No, I think you owe it to her to talk face to face.
Fair enough.
Just out of curiosity, what could you possibly have to say to my sister after that smear job? That I quit.
That my stomach can't handle it anymore, and neither can my conscience.
Do you know how I can get in touch with Kelly Taylor? Yeah, as a matter of fact, I do.
You know, somehow that seemed easier for me this time.
Well, you always focus when you're angry.
- How'd you do, bro? - I think my brain cells are fried.
Well, it was a walk in the park for me.
I nailed that sucker.
Speaking of walking, let's get out of here before Miss Teenage America comes out.
Really, I'm starving.
Guys, what about Donna? I mean, they've given her extra time, but it may take, like, an hour and a half.
So we'll go get something to eat and come back for her.
And what if she finishes early? Oh, great.
Look who's coming out.
Well, I've got nothing to say to her.
So how'd it go? As badly as you would expect, considering the amount of sleep that I got.
Well, if it's any consolation, I didn't sleep much either, Brenda.
- I'm glad.
- You have every right to hate me.
- I totally betrayed your trust.
- Yeah, you did.
And I don't get it.
You were in cahoots with them too? No, he wasn't and neither was Brenda.
She's as much an innocent victim in all of this as you were.
That's what I'm here to try to explain.
- Yeah, save it for the judge.
- Steve, come on, give her a chance.
Why should we believe anything she has to say? Because why else would I be here if I didn't wanna tell the truth? She's just trying to assuage her feelings of guilt.
- Well, it's not gonna work.
- Yeah, you're right, it won't work.
Because I caved at the end, and I have to live with that.
But it didn't start out that way.
We wanted it differently, Brenda and I.
We wanted to say, "Here, you see this blond bombshell from Beverly Hills? Well, she's a really terrific girl.
She's sweet and intelligent and one of a kind.
" That's what you were gonna say.
What was wrong with that? Because in the real world, you have a boss, and your boss has a boss, and you get sucked in.
That's not a good enough reason.
I agree.
That's why I quit immediately after the broadcast.
Look, my apology doesn't make it right, but believe me, Brenda had nothing but the best intentions in this.
And I have her on tape to prove it, if you'll take the time to look.
Did you really say that I'm intelligent and one of a kind? I sure did.
I'm sorry.
Beth, you shouldn't smoke.
It's bad for your health.
Yeah.
"Assuage," young David? It's to lessen the intensity of.
- I know what it means.
- Is that really what it means? So, what kind of special treatment did you get? Is it open-book testing or what? No, it just means I got more time.
I wish I had more time.
Remember all those questions they asked about space exploration? In the reading-comprehension part.
Well, was the narrator supposed to be a Martian? You are so lame.
Steve, he was a Martian, otherwise the whole story wouldn't have made any sense.
He was a Martian? Nikki, come here, sit next to me.
No, thanks, really, it's okay.
I don't wanna intrude.
Excuse me.
Nikki.
Nikki.
Can I talk to you for a second? I know what you're gonna say, but they told me you weren't working today.
I didn't know you were gonna be here.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to be bugging you Nikki, Nikki, it's okay.
I just wanted to apologise for blowing up at you yesterday.
I was preoccupied with a lot of things.
In fact, I don't know really what was going on.
It was so unlike me, actually.
Obviously, you're a very nice person.
In fact, I like you.
There was this boy in third grade, his name was Marty Halfon.
He used to kick my chair and make me cry.
And my mother said it was because he liked me, which I found so strange.
Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt.
I just had to do that.
It's okay.
I understand.
So you want a milkshake or something? Yeah.
Chocolate or vanilla? - How about a little of both? - Little of both.