Drop Dead Diva s03e08 Episode Script
He Said, She Said
See that aspiring model there? That was me Deb.
Until the day I died.
I thought I'd go straight to Heaven, but there was a bit of a mix-up, and I woke up in someone else's body.
So now I'm Jane, a super-busy lawyer with my very own assistant.
I got a new life, a new wardrobe, and the only people who really know what's going on with me are my girlfriend Stacy and my guardian angel, Fred.
I used to think everything happened for a reason Whoo! and, well, I sure hope I was right.
Drop Dead Diva 3x08 - He Said, She Said Original air date August 14, 2011 Morning.
- You're late! - Ah.
I got sucked in *****.
Corned beef sandwich? It's for you to give to Parker.
It's from his favourite deli.
Is it his birthday? No, you missed the morning staff meeting.
Oh! And nothing says I'm sorry like churned meat.
- Thank you, Teri.
- Oh, wait! I want a pickle.
Parker! I'm sorry I'm late Oh! God! Don't you knock!? I knocked! I mean I thought I knocked Hi, Jane.
Hi, Bobbi.
Hey, did you hear me knock? Oh.
Anyway.
I'm really sorry that I'm late this morning.
But I treat you to a corned beef sandwich to Out! I'll just put it right here then Out.
Always nice to see you, Bobbi.
I don't understand why you're so upset.
As Jane, I've had to endure a lot.
I lost my boyfriend, my modelling career, and eight years of my life, but this is is too much.
You knew they were dating.
No.
No.
I knew that they were having meals together, but I didn't know that Parker was doing my mom in his office.
She's not your mom.
She's Deb's mom.
Are you serious with that? You should be happy for her.
You know, I read a Harvard study that says that sexually active, perimenopausal women live longer, more fulfilling lives.
She can have all the damn sex she wants, but not with my boss! - Jane? - What?! You need to go to the Belmont Hotel in Santa Monica.
I should.
The SPA.
Wait.
Why? I got a panicky call from a young woman, Mia Dalton.
She needs a lawyer, and it's urgent.
Okay.
Okay.
Look, I get to leave the office.
Oh! There she is.
- Ella? - Aunt Kim! Hi, sweet stuff.
- Watch your hands, Ella.
- It's okay.
It's only chocolate.
And this is only Armani.
What are you doing here with my niece? We're having a doughnut-eating contest.
Oh.
Your mom's gonna love that.
Well, I offered to help out.
Your sister's in your office.
Must be my lucky day.
You're in my chair.
You haven't seen me since Christmas, and this is how you say hello? Ella's out there.
She's not having junk food, right? Nope.
Yogurt and fruit.
- Mwah! - Mwah! What do you want, Jenna? I've got a great case big divorce.
Mine.
Oh, you mean your divorce that was "almost final" last Christmas? All right, I hired the wrong lawyer, Kim.
This guy was an amateur.
He sold me on something called, um, binding arbitration.
Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.
It's fair for you and Doug.
Well, we've been going back and forth for months.
And this butt-for-brains arbitrator approved a final offer and told me I had to take it.
Yeah, that's how binding arbitration works.
The "binding" part means that it's binding.
Well, I told him I wouldn't sign it.
And guess what he said right to my face.
"Get another lawyer"? Wow.
You're good.
Kim, look, they're railroading me, all right? But I've got new leverage.
Turns out Doug is getting remarried next week.
Hmm.
And if you don't sign, then he's not divorced, and he can't get remarried.
It's like we share the same brain.
Jenna, the only way to reopen that agreement is to prove fraud, and that means going to federal court.
Well, you always said I turn everything into a federal case.
I'll see what I can do.
Ms.
Bingum? Hi.
Call me Jane.
Hi.
Um, I need your help.
Could you come with me? I guess.
Sure.
I got your name off of a Google search.
Oh.
You've won some big cases.
Oh, well, thank you.
It's true.
I think I have a problem, you know, the the kind that needs a lawyer.
All right.
Before we go in, I need you to hold on to this for me and keep it safe.
Okay.
I think I may have done something really bad.
Oh, God! Jane, this is my friend Allie.
Who's that? Vince Adams, the Hammet University quarterback.
Okay, please, please tell me that you walked in here and you found him like this.
Okay.
Hi, Vince.
I'm here to help.
So, I'm just gonna start by by by taking this off your mouth.
Call the cops.
You're right.
This is bad.
You crazy bitch! I didn't do anything! Untie me! Say it, Vince.
I want to hear you say the words.
Admit it.
Fine.
We had sex.
It wasn't sex.
All right.
All right.
I raped you.
Is that what you want to hear? Now untie me! Okay.
So, he raped you.
And you guys tied him up to get a confession? It was the only way.
When did the rape happen? A month ago in his dorm room.
During a spring fling party.
Did you report it? I went to campus police.
They took me to health services.
A nurse did the physical exam.
I'm very sorry, Mia.
They promised me a full investigation.
But when they questioned Vince he sai he said it was consensual.
And that was it investigation over.
Football players are untouchable.
What about the LAPD? They reviewed the university's files and sided with them.
Jane, everyone thinks that I made the whole thing up.
So you came up with the idea to film his confession.
Allie got him to the motel room after cheerleading practice.
How? Uh, I said I was there, wearing this.
Um, he showed up.
I I tied him up.
And then I came out of the closet with the camera.
Okay.
You know we can't use this in court.
It's called a coerced confession.
It still felt really good hearing him say the words.
Jane, are we going to jail? Not if I can help it.
To the charges of aggravated mayhem, kidnapping, and false imprisonment, how do you plead? Not guilty.
And I'm requesting that my clients be released on their own recognizance.
They abducted the Hammet University star quarterback.
The state is demanding $200,000 bail.
Um there were extenuating circumstances, Your Honor.
The "star quarterback" sexually assaulted my client.
Not only is that slanderous, it's irrelevant.
Maybe it wasn't the most rational response to being raped, but it nevertheless informs this case.
Save the extenuating circumstances for trial.
Does the state have any further bail arguments? Uh, one minute, Your Honor.
What are you doing here? Hammet's attorney contacted me.
I'm an alum.
This is gonna be good news for your clients.
What's going on, people? Your Honor, there's a possibility we won't be pursuing charges.
The state requests a short recess.
You've got five minutes.
What just happened? Vince told his coach what he said on your client's camera.
- That's not admissible in court.
- It doesn't matter.
The last thing the school wants is for that video to go viral.
They're gonna offer you a deal.
What kind of deal? Hand over the camera, promise you won't go after Vince in civil court, and your clients go free.
How can you guarantee that? You're not the DA.
Well, if Vince doesn't testify, the DA doesn't have a case.
Jane, the cops have your clients in the motel room with the victim tied to a bed.
Do you want to put those facts in front of a jury? What is the matter with you? Mia was raped.
What's the matter with me? I'm trying to help your clients.
Okay.
You have a really big decision to make.
If we don't hand over the video, we'll go to jail? There's a good chance, yes.
If we hand it over, Vince wins again.
Maybe not.
If you give up the video, I will find a way to hold Vince accountable.
Now, I know it's a lot to ask, but trust me.
Okay.
Okay.
Ms.
Kaswell, your client is subject to binding arbitration.
Why are you here? Your Honor, if I may we're only here because Jenna Kaswell-Bailey doesn't want my client to get remarried.
Dude, I don't care if he's getting remarried.
Hell, I will cut the cake.
We're here because he's trying to dick me over.
Jenna, I have been more than fair.
I don't hear you.
I don't see you.
I do, however, smell your antifungal foot spray.
- Ew! - Enough.
Your Honor, we're here because my client is a victim of fraud.
This is a common stock issuance for 100 shares of United Technologies, Incorporated shares Doug failed to mention in his list of assets.
Because that stock is worthless.
United Technologies filed for Chapter 11.
My client took a loss.
They did file for Chapter 11, but prior to bankruptcy, United Technologies was acquired by T.
E.
Capital.
The value of Mr.
Bailey's shares is approximately $500.
$500 of fraud.
If that's true, that's a tiny oversight which we will correct.
The point is, after only a few hours of searching, I discovered this "tiny oversight.
" I have to wonder what else they missed.
We spent months cataloging assets.
Then what's another few days? I'm ordering that the arbitration be reopened.
- Thank you.
- Sustained! Jane.
Hey.
What did you do? You'll have to be more specific.
I read the filing Mia Dalton v.
Hammet University? We had a deal.
Mia agreed not to sue the quarterback.
I never said anything about not suing the university.
Well, it was implied.
Okay, first of all, it wasn't.
And, second of all, who are you to tell me when, where, and how my client can sue? You've got no grounds.
The university, at best, was negligent.
At worst, they covered up a rape.
The charge was investigated.
The university found no credible evidence.
Maybe because the cops and the coach and the administration were all too busy making sure their quarterback didn't miss a game.
Or maybe there was nothing to find.
Well, I guess we'll know soon enough.
Why are you looking to give my school a black eye? You don't even know this girl.
Grayson Hammet University is just a college that you attended 10 years ago.
It is not your family.
It's just it's just a bunch of buildings.
Are you so impressed with your diploma that you'd let them cover up a rape? Jane, do you have a minute? Um you know what? I'm due in court in a few.
But i it's good to see you.
You mean with my top on? Yeah.
Well I owe you an apology.
That was so inappropriate.
It's fine.
No, you know.
Kids will be kids, right? By the way, I love the La Perla bra.
Oh, Deb got it for me.
My daughter believed in the power of a good foundation.
But I don't think she knew that it would make me so frisky.
No.
[ Laughs .]
I bet not.
No.
So I guess things are going well with you and Parker? Oh, God.
No one's more surprised than me.
Jane, I really like him.
You know what? That's great.
I'm so happy for you.
Oh.
You know, and they say that a healthy sex life, uh, will have you living longer, so I'm all for that.
Well, thank you, I think.
Look, I see you're busy, and Parker's waiting for me, so Yes.
Well, I will stay out of his office.
Oh, don't worry.
We're going out for lunch.
Hey! That is my almond milk.
Well, I guess that makes you Teri.
How do you get milk out of almonds? I mean, they're nuts, right? What, do they have little, teeny-weeny nipples or something? They pound them.
They beat them until the little guys are screaming for mercy.
So, are you gonna replace what you drank? It's organic.
Oh, well, I would tell you to have your assistant buy you another carton, but I can tell by your shoes that you are the assistant.
And I can tell by your shoes that you're a bitch.
Well, I'd rather be a tasteful bitch than a tacky butch.
At least I dress my age.
But, then again, with all that work, who can tell yours? Who the hell are you, anyway? I'm Kim's sister.
Why are you laughing? I just never thought that Kim would be the sweet one.
"Parker.
" Is that the guy who was banging my sister? Yeah.
Oh.
Okay, good.
I'll eat his corned beef sandwich.
Mr.
Tyson, you took Mia's rape statement.
That's correct.
I'm head of campus security.
In your report, how did you describe her demeanor? She was traumatized consistent with a rape victim.
Thank you.
Your own investigation determined there was no rape, correct? The health exam was inconclusive.
I questioned Vince and determined Mia's claim was a one-on-one, a he said/she said.
There was no case.
Isn't it true that Vince has been questioned by the campus police numerous times for harassment, public drunkenness, - and even robbery? - Yes.
Has he ever been arrested or convicted? No.
Why's that? Because the evidence didn't bear out.
Mr.
Tyson, does this sound familiar? Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Whoo! Go, Hammet! Mm yeah, sure.
That's the cheer that kicks off every football game.
That's right.
Is it possible that the school just didn't want the evidence to "bear out" because Vince is on the football team, the football team that we all bow down to? Objection.
Withdrawn.
No more questions.
All right, uh, I've re-cataloged the assets.
I organized them by value and color-coded everything Jenna requested the first go-around.
Actually, there's just one thing I want.
What's that? I'm fine with the distribution of assets as long as I also get the New Haven beehive clock.
Oh, my God! You're unbelievable! Wait the, uh, the bedroom clock on page 14? That's what this whole thing is about? The damn clock? We've been through this.
You can't have it.
Oh, Doug, it's just a clock.
And ticktock.
Your wedding day is getting closer.
The clock has been in my family for generations.
Every lawyer you talk to says you'd never get it.
I have a new lawyer! Yeah, I'm gonna need a few minutes with my client.
Excuse us.
- Let's go! - All right.
Are you kidding me? This was all about a stupid clock? Are you mad? You look mad.
You know, a little bovine filler would fix that crease.
Stop it, Jenna.
I bumped you up to the top of my client list for a clock? And I love you for it, like a sister or a Louis Vuitton purse.
Okay, um, I will drive you down to Bed, Bath & Beyond, and you can buy any clock you want.
I need that particular clock.
There's just something about the gentle ticking, the tenor of the chimes.
For years, I have fallen asleep to that clock, and now I can't sleep without it.
You have no moral, equitable, or legal claim to that man's family heirloom! Which is why I didn't mention it to you yesterday.
So you manipulated me? You are smart.
Now get in there and manipulate them.
Doug, if you want to get married this weekend, we're gonna need the clock.
Okay.
I'm done.
That's it.
I'll push my wedding if I have to.
Really? Because the band you booked doesn't return the deposit.
And I hear they do a horrible version of "Freeway Of Love.
" You are a virus! I can't believe I ever married you! Enjoy that, did you? I do feel like I'm getting my money's worth.
They were pissed.
Yeah.
I was at the party with Mia.
Vince was flirting with her all night, bringing her drinks.
Did you see Mia go into Vince's dorm room? She cut her finger opening a beer, and Vince offered to get her a band-aid.
I bumped into her about an hour later outside of her dorm.
She was crying.
And she told me that Vince forced her to have sex.
Were you surprised when Vince wasn't arrested? The school treats the football players like rock stars.
They get all sorts of free stuff furniture, electronics, the best dorm rooms.
They get away with anything.
And Vince is the worst.
He's he's completely self-absorbed.
I mean, just check his Twitter feed.
He talks about himself in the third person.
Uh, thank you.
Allie were you ever romantically involved with Vince? I I hooked up with him once.
Do you remember when? Sure do.
It was Valentine's day.
I never heard from him again.
Valentine's day.
Ouch.
Would you say that gives you an incentive to testify against him in court? - Objection.
- Goes to bias, Your Honor.
I'll allow it.
No, no.
I I don't hold a grudge.
The only reason I'm here is because he raped my best friend and the university did nothing about it.
Nothing further.
Bingum.
How was court? Okay.
I still need to prove that the university covered up the rape, and I'm not there yet, but We need to talk about what happened here yesterday.
- We do? - Mm-hmm.
Oh, God.
Fine.
It was unprofessional, disruptive, very upsetting - I couldn't agree more - and unhygienic.
And you lost me.
What is it that you think we're talking about here? You and Bobbi Dobkins in your office.
You're upset about that? We were behind closed doors.
Next time, lock them.
Don't worry.
There won't be a next time.
At least not with Bobbi.
Wait.
I I thought things were going great with you two.
Okay, not really your business, but I am ending it.
No.
No, you ca now she cares about you.
Okay, did you hear the part where I said "not really your business"? Wait.
What did you think we needed to talk about? You and Grayson going all barroom brawl in the bullpen.
- We had a legal disagreement.
- You scared the temps.
You're the senior attorney.
Go make nice.
Do you have a minute? Sure.
Hello, Ms.
Bingum.
Are you freaking kidding me?! Oh, it's not what it looks like.
What a relief, because it looks like you're meeting with opposing counsel behind my back! Jane, would you calm down? Do not tell me to calm down! Grayson, stay the hell out of my case! Oh! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Hey, hey.
Hey, what's going on? Grayson? Whoa.
Well, get with the program, Jane.
Go, Hammet! Yeah! Hammet! Hammet! Maybe the dream has nothing to do with the case and you simply miss the good old days.
No, that's not it.
I'm mad at Grayson.
Mm.
He chose his college over my client.
He loves that place.
Oh.
And you remember that Hammet sweatshirt he wore every day until you "accidentally" gave it to a homeless person? That's the thing.
Has Grayson changed, or has he always been like that and I just didn't notice? Grayson's one of the good guys, Jane.
Yeah, well, you know what? Maybe there are no good guys.
Maybe that's a myth.
Why are you talking like that? Parker's dumping Bobbi.
Ohh.
Well, you must feel relieved.
No.
I feel horrible.
He's gonna break my mom's heart, and there's nothing I can do about it.
Well, maybe you're wrong about that.
I can't force Parker to date her.
No, but you can protect Bobbi's feelings.
Remember in high school when you were dating Dennis Burke and I told you that I saw him wearing socks with sandals? Ugh! Big fashion faux pas.
I had to break up with him.
Exactly.
But Dennis never wore socks with sandals.
I heard that he was going to dump you, so I created a perfect lie so you would dump him first.
That is the sweetest thing ever.
Mm.
Thank you.
Now we have to tell her something about Parker that's a deal-breaker.
- Mm.
- Oh! I've got it.
He listens to Justin Bieber.
She's got Bieber fever.
Oh.
How about he put himself through law school as a female impersonator? Yeah, but she'd just want to dress him up and take him out for karaoke at mother lode.
Oh.
Oh, I've got it.
Ooh.
And if I hurry, I can catch her while she's still ordering her post-yoga chai latte.
Thank you, Stace.
He hunts? Big-time.
Well, what kind of animals? Um, what kind? Um, furry ones.
I mean, bunnies and raccoons Bambi.
- Really? - Yeah.
And someone said something about you being a member of PETA and that you've dabbled in veganism, so I just thought you should know.
I see.
He decorates his Tahoe cabin with their pelts.
Well, this is awful.
Mm-hmm.
And I've got to get going.
Okay.
Pelts? I know.
I mean, it's not my thing, but Just when you think you know someone Yeah.
Doug? What are you doing here? Did you have a change of heart? No.
But my fiancée did.
She made it pretty clear that we were not pushing our wedding over a stupid clock.
I just hate that Jenna won.
No, you won.
Now Jenna will sign the divorce papers, and you can start a new, happy life.
Doug will you tell your fiancée that I'm sorry? You know, not all Kaswells are so Stubborn? Yeah, that's one way to put it.
Okay, I looked at all of Vince's tweets.
The guy is a total ass.
He raffles off the chance for some lucky coed to do his laundry.
Ew.
That's awful.
But here's what we need one key to proving rape is illustrating the guy's mental state, his intent.
So I thought if we looked at his Twitter feed around the time of the rape, we might find something relevant.
Well, tell me if this is relevant.
On the morning of the rape, he tweeted the number 9.
I went backwards in time, and over the last six months, he's tweeted 1 through 8.
On Valentine's day, he was at 7.
- The day he had sex with Allie.
- Yeah.
He's been keeping count of his sexual conquests on Twitter.
That is disgusting.
And very relevant.
What I don't understand is next to each number, there's an Internet link.
And when I click on the link, watch what happens.
"Dancing in the end zone"? It's football-player code for "getting some.
" Vince is a pig.
Can I talk to you for a minute? I have nothing to say to you.
Then you can listen.
I wasn't talking to Thurmond behind your back.
I was in the process of deciding whether to throw him out the window or down the stairs - when you showed up.
- What did he want? My help in convincing you to stop your suit.
Which proved to me he had something to hide.
I see.
Look, I admit I'm a big fan of my Alma Mater.
But there's a difference between school spirit and blind allegiance.
I don't want you to think I don't understand that.
You care what I think? Of course.
From the day I met you.
Thank you.
Now I think you're due in court.
Yes.
How about I join you as second chair? Yeah.
So, Mia you had no reservations about going to a guy's room alone? No.
It's a coed dorm.
We all hang out together.
So you thought you would get the band-aid for your finger and then just go back to the party? Yes.
But that's not what happened.
Once we got to his room, he started kidding around.
He held the band-aid up like "come and get it.
" When I reached for it, he pulled me in, and he kissed me.
And I was like, "Whoa, dude.
I I didn't come here for that.
" When he tried to kiss me again, I told him to cut it out, and I headed for the door.
Why didn't you leave? He grabbed me by the arm hard and he shoved me onto the bed.
I tried to get up, but he got on top of me.
It's okay.
Just take your time.
I couldn't push him off.
I kept telling him "no," but he just kept on going.
Since when are you a football fan? I hate the sport.
They should call it "let's give each other brain damage.
" This is for the case.
It's that quarterback's website.
"Dancing in the end zone"? It's a euphemism for "sex.
" - Why is he throwing the ball out of bounds? - What? His body is facing the end zone, but his wrist is off axis.
Look.
Watch.
Follow the cursor.
Holy crap.
It's an easter egg.
You lost me.
Uh, it's a hidden link.
See, the football is superimposed onto the photo, and it's a gateway to a secure site.
Here.
Try a a password.
Try "football.
" Huh.
Try "jock.
" Or how about "strap"? How about I get a subpoena? Nice work, Freddy.
That works.
Hey, the clock.
I take it this means you won.
Yeah.
More like the other side surrendered.
What's going on, Kim? Nothing.
I got dragged into my sister's drama again.
This is why I only want to see her at holidays.
Family can't pick 'em, you can't kill 'em.
Best you can do is get caller I.
D.
and train the receptionist to keep them out of the office.
Big sis incoming.
Jenna.
Ugh.
Kimmie, you are the best.
I've always said so.
No, you haven't.
Well, no one's really asked.
Congrats.
Now you can sleep.
Yeah.
Right.
Whatever.
What are you doing?! You're gonna break it! I just got to pry this open.
Oh, my God.
You never cared about the clock.
Mnh-mnh.
But have you ever seen uncut diamonds before? Thank you, grandma Daisy.
I don't understand.
Doug's great-great-grandmother was a very smart woman.
She knew that men are idiots who can't be trusted.
So she hid diamonds in this clock as a safety net in case the men screwed up.
It's a secret she passed down daughter-to-daughter.
And then Doug's grandmother passed it down to me.
'Cause Doug doesn't have any sisters and his mother passed away a while ago.
Yeah, and for a minute there, she actually thought I was an angel.
I don't understand.
Why would you go through all this? Why wouldn't you just take the diamonds out after she told you about them? I really didn't think I would need them.
You know, he's the only man who ever told me I was beautiful, right? He's an idiot.
Anyway, I actually believed Doug when he said he was in love with me, and then he sprung this divorce on me.
By the time I got home, he'd put everything in storage.
He probably thought you'd burn it all.
Well, I did buy gasoline.
I know you're judging me, Kim, but I'm not like you.
I do facials in the back of a salon, and I'm not very good at it.
So now I have a safety net for my daughter.
Wait, Jenna.
Don't you want your clock? No.
I don't want anything that reminds me of Doug.
Mia, you've testified that Vince was "wasted" on the night in question, but he wasn't the only one drinking, was he? - I had one beer.
- Really? These photos were pulled from your friends' Facebook pages.
Here you are.
Here you are again.
And again.
Ms.
Dalton, another photo from the party.
Who's that guy? That's Vince.
Eight months ago, did you post on your Facebook page "I love you forever, Vince"? He won the big game.
Cheerleaders support the football players.
Right.
Is that why you had sexual intercourse with two other players before Vince? Your Honor! Sexual history is irrelevant under rape shield laws.
This is a civil case, not a criminal one, counselor.
He's right.
Answer the question.
One of the players was my boyfriend.
We went out for a year.
And when he ended it, didn't you seek counseling at health services because you were so depressed, you even threatened to harm yourself? There was more to it than that.
I'm sure there was.
Let's get back to Vince.
The day after you two had sex, did you call up Vince? - Yes, because - Did he return your calls? - No, but - Didn't that make you angry? - Well, yes, be - Because he was over you.
Objection! Overruled.
Ms.
Dalton, you'll go to any extreme when you don't get your way, isn't that right? Your Honor, please! I've got no further questions.
Hey.
How's Mia doing? She told me she wishes we never brought the complaint, and now she wants to quit school.
Sorry.
Everyone thinks she's the campus whack job, and the guy who rapes her is a hero.
I mean, who can blame her? I got it.
"Score12.
" - What? - The password to Vince's website.
We subpoenaed the company that contracts the university server.
"Score12" 12 is the number on his, um outfit.
- It's a jersey.
- Whatever.
Check it out.
Type it in.
Dates, numbers, icons my God.
It's a sexual table of contents.
Video icons correspond to each sexual encounter.
Allie and Mia never said anything about being taped.
Well, they probably didn't know.
I mean, it's really easy to flip on a laptop cam without your partner knowing.
I'm just saying.
Could he really be that stupid to record a rape? He probably didn't think she'd say no.
Well, he was smart enough to delete the videos.
Yeah, we subpoenaed his personal computer, and that was wiped clean.
I think we should call the quarterback to the stand.
Grayson, this is all circumstantial.
We don't have any hard evidence.
Let me work on that.
Kim.
W what are you doing? It's yours.
And you should take it before she changes her mind.
Wow.
Thanks.
Come in.
Please.
Can I get you something to drink? No, thank you.
But you can tell me what you did with the real diamonds.
What? Come on, Doug.
Cut the crap.
Unlike my sister, I know what uncut diamonds look like, and that bag of rocks she pulled from the clock were mostly quartz.
Is she in the car? No.
I haven't told her.
But you did switch them, didn't you? And then you fought for the clock so she wouldn't catch on.
Oh! Wow.
Now, these are real.
When I told my grandmother that I was gonna leave Jenna, she told me about the clock.
And she was adamant that Jenna not get her hands on these.
Well, technically, they don't belong to you.
They belong to my daughter.
And I'm keeping them safe for her.
I was hoping you'd say that.
I drew up a trust stating as much.
Ella gets the diamonds when she turns 18.
A trust? When Jenna finds out that she's got fakes, she could pierce the arbitration agreement and take half.
Why are you doing this? My client wants financial security for her daughter's future, and that is what I'm giving her.
Vince, I'm gonna get right to the point.
Do you secretly videotape your sexual conquests - and post them online? - Objection! There's no proof Vince videotaped anything.
A little leeway, Your Honor.
If I can establish that such tapes exist, we'll know exactly what occurred on the night in question.
Okay, but watch your step.
Why don't I start with an easier question? Vince, did you buy your own laptop? Uh, no, ma'am.
The school gave it to me.
It was part of my sports scholarship.
You're aware it was subpoenaed? Yeah.
The hard drive was empty no term papers, no photos, no music, no videos.
Nothing that an average college student would have.
Why? Must be a glitch.
You know, I'm I'm a jock.
I'm I'm not so good with computers.
Oh.
Yeah? Well, I guess it could have been a glitch.
Or maybe you wiped it clean when you heard you'd have to turn it over.
Objection.
In what world does an empty hard drive prove there were sex tapes? Ms.
Bingum, he's right.
Is that all you have? Vince, are you aware that the university has an automatic passive backup system for every school-issued computer? In jock speak, everything on your computer was punted to the backup system.
Uh no.
No, I wasn't aware of that.
Your Honor, we'd like to request a court order to immediately access the server.
Objection.
We need time to research and file a Memo of Law.
Do you mean you need time to erase the backup? Overruled.
Access the server.
Mr.
Thurmond's second chair works for the university and has a laptop.
I imagine he could access the server in minutes.
Don't you dare.
You didn't just instruct your associate to disobey my order? Unless you want to be held in contempt, access the server now.
I think you should do what he says.
Click on Vince's football and type in "Score12.
" Oh.
Look.
There they are.
Vince, you testified that you and Mia had consensual sex.
Before we watch "video number 9" from your website, would you like to change your answer? Oh.
I think he wants you to invoke the fifth amendment.
But I think you should tell the truth.
Why did you remove the videos from your website and the laptop? He said he would take care of it.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Who said that? My lawyer.
Do you mean the university's lawyer? Same guy.
No more questions.
The university just called with a settlement.
They are revamping their date-rape policies Good.
Thurmond is facing criminal charges, and Vince is suspended, pending trial for sexual assault.
You did well.
Thank you.
I did have some help.
Well I'm really sorry about your school.
Hey.
It's not my family.
It's just a bunch of buildings.
Well, all right, any bunch of buildings that sent a guy like you out into the world can't be that bad.
Oh.
I'll grab you a drink to celebrate.
All right.
- Bobbi.
- Hi.
Hi.
Hi, hi, hi.
Oh.
Thank you for the call.
I did not want to be home tonight.
You look gorgeous.
Oh, good.
That was the plan.
I broke up with Parker, and I wanted to leave him with a twinge of regret.
Oh.
You broke up with him? Oh, please.
Parker was going to break up with me, and you were just giving me the heads-up.
- Uh - The closest that man ever comes to hunting is ordering a prime rib at the Palm.
So you knew what I was doing? The preemptive breakup.
I practically invented it.
Oh, Jane.
What was I thinking? With a younger man? Deb would have been appalled.
Maybe.
Or maybe she would have been happy that you were happy.
Are you sure you didn't know her? Ladies what are we drinking to? Uh to happiness.
To the preemptive breakup.
In English? To Deb.
That one, I get.
To Deb.
Until the day I died.
I thought I'd go straight to Heaven, but there was a bit of a mix-up, and I woke up in someone else's body.
So now I'm Jane, a super-busy lawyer with my very own assistant.
I got a new life, a new wardrobe, and the only people who really know what's going on with me are my girlfriend Stacy and my guardian angel, Fred.
I used to think everything happened for a reason Whoo! and, well, I sure hope I was right.
Drop Dead Diva 3x08 - He Said, She Said Original air date August 14, 2011 Morning.
- You're late! - Ah.
I got sucked in *****.
Corned beef sandwich? It's for you to give to Parker.
It's from his favourite deli.
Is it his birthday? No, you missed the morning staff meeting.
Oh! And nothing says I'm sorry like churned meat.
- Thank you, Teri.
- Oh, wait! I want a pickle.
Parker! I'm sorry I'm late Oh! God! Don't you knock!? I knocked! I mean I thought I knocked Hi, Jane.
Hi, Bobbi.
Hey, did you hear me knock? Oh.
Anyway.
I'm really sorry that I'm late this morning.
But I treat you to a corned beef sandwich to Out! I'll just put it right here then Out.
Always nice to see you, Bobbi.
I don't understand why you're so upset.
As Jane, I've had to endure a lot.
I lost my boyfriend, my modelling career, and eight years of my life, but this is is too much.
You knew they were dating.
No.
No.
I knew that they were having meals together, but I didn't know that Parker was doing my mom in his office.
She's not your mom.
She's Deb's mom.
Are you serious with that? You should be happy for her.
You know, I read a Harvard study that says that sexually active, perimenopausal women live longer, more fulfilling lives.
She can have all the damn sex she wants, but not with my boss! - Jane? - What?! You need to go to the Belmont Hotel in Santa Monica.
I should.
The SPA.
Wait.
Why? I got a panicky call from a young woman, Mia Dalton.
She needs a lawyer, and it's urgent.
Okay.
Okay.
Look, I get to leave the office.
Oh! There she is.
- Ella? - Aunt Kim! Hi, sweet stuff.
- Watch your hands, Ella.
- It's okay.
It's only chocolate.
And this is only Armani.
What are you doing here with my niece? We're having a doughnut-eating contest.
Oh.
Your mom's gonna love that.
Well, I offered to help out.
Your sister's in your office.
Must be my lucky day.
You're in my chair.
You haven't seen me since Christmas, and this is how you say hello? Ella's out there.
She's not having junk food, right? Nope.
Yogurt and fruit.
- Mwah! - Mwah! What do you want, Jenna? I've got a great case big divorce.
Mine.
Oh, you mean your divorce that was "almost final" last Christmas? All right, I hired the wrong lawyer, Kim.
This guy was an amateur.
He sold me on something called, um, binding arbitration.
Yeah, there's nothing wrong with that.
It's fair for you and Doug.
Well, we've been going back and forth for months.
And this butt-for-brains arbitrator approved a final offer and told me I had to take it.
Yeah, that's how binding arbitration works.
The "binding" part means that it's binding.
Well, I told him I wouldn't sign it.
And guess what he said right to my face.
"Get another lawyer"? Wow.
You're good.
Kim, look, they're railroading me, all right? But I've got new leverage.
Turns out Doug is getting remarried next week.
Hmm.
And if you don't sign, then he's not divorced, and he can't get remarried.
It's like we share the same brain.
Jenna, the only way to reopen that agreement is to prove fraud, and that means going to federal court.
Well, you always said I turn everything into a federal case.
I'll see what I can do.
Ms.
Bingum? Hi.
Call me Jane.
Hi.
Um, I need your help.
Could you come with me? I guess.
Sure.
I got your name off of a Google search.
Oh.
You've won some big cases.
Oh, well, thank you.
It's true.
I think I have a problem, you know, the the kind that needs a lawyer.
All right.
Before we go in, I need you to hold on to this for me and keep it safe.
Okay.
I think I may have done something really bad.
Oh, God! Jane, this is my friend Allie.
Who's that? Vince Adams, the Hammet University quarterback.
Okay, please, please tell me that you walked in here and you found him like this.
Okay.
Hi, Vince.
I'm here to help.
So, I'm just gonna start by by by taking this off your mouth.
Call the cops.
You're right.
This is bad.
You crazy bitch! I didn't do anything! Untie me! Say it, Vince.
I want to hear you say the words.
Admit it.
Fine.
We had sex.
It wasn't sex.
All right.
All right.
I raped you.
Is that what you want to hear? Now untie me! Okay.
So, he raped you.
And you guys tied him up to get a confession? It was the only way.
When did the rape happen? A month ago in his dorm room.
During a spring fling party.
Did you report it? I went to campus police.
They took me to health services.
A nurse did the physical exam.
I'm very sorry, Mia.
They promised me a full investigation.
But when they questioned Vince he sai he said it was consensual.
And that was it investigation over.
Football players are untouchable.
What about the LAPD? They reviewed the university's files and sided with them.
Jane, everyone thinks that I made the whole thing up.
So you came up with the idea to film his confession.
Allie got him to the motel room after cheerleading practice.
How? Uh, I said I was there, wearing this.
Um, he showed up.
I I tied him up.
And then I came out of the closet with the camera.
Okay.
You know we can't use this in court.
It's called a coerced confession.
It still felt really good hearing him say the words.
Jane, are we going to jail? Not if I can help it.
To the charges of aggravated mayhem, kidnapping, and false imprisonment, how do you plead? Not guilty.
And I'm requesting that my clients be released on their own recognizance.
They abducted the Hammet University star quarterback.
The state is demanding $200,000 bail.
Um there were extenuating circumstances, Your Honor.
The "star quarterback" sexually assaulted my client.
Not only is that slanderous, it's irrelevant.
Maybe it wasn't the most rational response to being raped, but it nevertheless informs this case.
Save the extenuating circumstances for trial.
Does the state have any further bail arguments? Uh, one minute, Your Honor.
What are you doing here? Hammet's attorney contacted me.
I'm an alum.
This is gonna be good news for your clients.
What's going on, people? Your Honor, there's a possibility we won't be pursuing charges.
The state requests a short recess.
You've got five minutes.
What just happened? Vince told his coach what he said on your client's camera.
- That's not admissible in court.
- It doesn't matter.
The last thing the school wants is for that video to go viral.
They're gonna offer you a deal.
What kind of deal? Hand over the camera, promise you won't go after Vince in civil court, and your clients go free.
How can you guarantee that? You're not the DA.
Well, if Vince doesn't testify, the DA doesn't have a case.
Jane, the cops have your clients in the motel room with the victim tied to a bed.
Do you want to put those facts in front of a jury? What is the matter with you? Mia was raped.
What's the matter with me? I'm trying to help your clients.
Okay.
You have a really big decision to make.
If we don't hand over the video, we'll go to jail? There's a good chance, yes.
If we hand it over, Vince wins again.
Maybe not.
If you give up the video, I will find a way to hold Vince accountable.
Now, I know it's a lot to ask, but trust me.
Okay.
Okay.
Ms.
Kaswell, your client is subject to binding arbitration.
Why are you here? Your Honor, if I may we're only here because Jenna Kaswell-Bailey doesn't want my client to get remarried.
Dude, I don't care if he's getting remarried.
Hell, I will cut the cake.
We're here because he's trying to dick me over.
Jenna, I have been more than fair.
I don't hear you.
I don't see you.
I do, however, smell your antifungal foot spray.
- Ew! - Enough.
Your Honor, we're here because my client is a victim of fraud.
This is a common stock issuance for 100 shares of United Technologies, Incorporated shares Doug failed to mention in his list of assets.
Because that stock is worthless.
United Technologies filed for Chapter 11.
My client took a loss.
They did file for Chapter 11, but prior to bankruptcy, United Technologies was acquired by T.
E.
Capital.
The value of Mr.
Bailey's shares is approximately $500.
$500 of fraud.
If that's true, that's a tiny oversight which we will correct.
The point is, after only a few hours of searching, I discovered this "tiny oversight.
" I have to wonder what else they missed.
We spent months cataloging assets.
Then what's another few days? I'm ordering that the arbitration be reopened.
- Thank you.
- Sustained! Jane.
Hey.
What did you do? You'll have to be more specific.
I read the filing Mia Dalton v.
Hammet University? We had a deal.
Mia agreed not to sue the quarterback.
I never said anything about not suing the university.
Well, it was implied.
Okay, first of all, it wasn't.
And, second of all, who are you to tell me when, where, and how my client can sue? You've got no grounds.
The university, at best, was negligent.
At worst, they covered up a rape.
The charge was investigated.
The university found no credible evidence.
Maybe because the cops and the coach and the administration were all too busy making sure their quarterback didn't miss a game.
Or maybe there was nothing to find.
Well, I guess we'll know soon enough.
Why are you looking to give my school a black eye? You don't even know this girl.
Grayson Hammet University is just a college that you attended 10 years ago.
It is not your family.
It's just it's just a bunch of buildings.
Are you so impressed with your diploma that you'd let them cover up a rape? Jane, do you have a minute? Um you know what? I'm due in court in a few.
But i it's good to see you.
You mean with my top on? Yeah.
Well I owe you an apology.
That was so inappropriate.
It's fine.
No, you know.
Kids will be kids, right? By the way, I love the La Perla bra.
Oh, Deb got it for me.
My daughter believed in the power of a good foundation.
But I don't think she knew that it would make me so frisky.
No.
[ Laughs .]
I bet not.
No.
So I guess things are going well with you and Parker? Oh, God.
No one's more surprised than me.
Jane, I really like him.
You know what? That's great.
I'm so happy for you.
Oh.
You know, and they say that a healthy sex life, uh, will have you living longer, so I'm all for that.
Well, thank you, I think.
Look, I see you're busy, and Parker's waiting for me, so Yes.
Well, I will stay out of his office.
Oh, don't worry.
We're going out for lunch.
Hey! That is my almond milk.
Well, I guess that makes you Teri.
How do you get milk out of almonds? I mean, they're nuts, right? What, do they have little, teeny-weeny nipples or something? They pound them.
They beat them until the little guys are screaming for mercy.
So, are you gonna replace what you drank? It's organic.
Oh, well, I would tell you to have your assistant buy you another carton, but I can tell by your shoes that you are the assistant.
And I can tell by your shoes that you're a bitch.
Well, I'd rather be a tasteful bitch than a tacky butch.
At least I dress my age.
But, then again, with all that work, who can tell yours? Who the hell are you, anyway? I'm Kim's sister.
Why are you laughing? I just never thought that Kim would be the sweet one.
"Parker.
" Is that the guy who was banging my sister? Yeah.
Oh.
Okay, good.
I'll eat his corned beef sandwich.
Mr.
Tyson, you took Mia's rape statement.
That's correct.
I'm head of campus security.
In your report, how did you describe her demeanor? She was traumatized consistent with a rape victim.
Thank you.
Your own investigation determined there was no rape, correct? The health exam was inconclusive.
I questioned Vince and determined Mia's claim was a one-on-one, a he said/she said.
There was no case.
Isn't it true that Vince has been questioned by the campus police numerous times for harassment, public drunkenness, - and even robbery? - Yes.
Has he ever been arrested or convicted? No.
Why's that? Because the evidence didn't bear out.
Mr.
Tyson, does this sound familiar? Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Whoo! Go, Hammet! Mm yeah, sure.
That's the cheer that kicks off every football game.
That's right.
Is it possible that the school just didn't want the evidence to "bear out" because Vince is on the football team, the football team that we all bow down to? Objection.
Withdrawn.
No more questions.
All right, uh, I've re-cataloged the assets.
I organized them by value and color-coded everything Jenna requested the first go-around.
Actually, there's just one thing I want.
What's that? I'm fine with the distribution of assets as long as I also get the New Haven beehive clock.
Oh, my God! You're unbelievable! Wait the, uh, the bedroom clock on page 14? That's what this whole thing is about? The damn clock? We've been through this.
You can't have it.
Oh, Doug, it's just a clock.
And ticktock.
Your wedding day is getting closer.
The clock has been in my family for generations.
Every lawyer you talk to says you'd never get it.
I have a new lawyer! Yeah, I'm gonna need a few minutes with my client.
Excuse us.
- Let's go! - All right.
Are you kidding me? This was all about a stupid clock? Are you mad? You look mad.
You know, a little bovine filler would fix that crease.
Stop it, Jenna.
I bumped you up to the top of my client list for a clock? And I love you for it, like a sister or a Louis Vuitton purse.
Okay, um, I will drive you down to Bed, Bath & Beyond, and you can buy any clock you want.
I need that particular clock.
There's just something about the gentle ticking, the tenor of the chimes.
For years, I have fallen asleep to that clock, and now I can't sleep without it.
You have no moral, equitable, or legal claim to that man's family heirloom! Which is why I didn't mention it to you yesterday.
So you manipulated me? You are smart.
Now get in there and manipulate them.
Doug, if you want to get married this weekend, we're gonna need the clock.
Okay.
I'm done.
That's it.
I'll push my wedding if I have to.
Really? Because the band you booked doesn't return the deposit.
And I hear they do a horrible version of "Freeway Of Love.
" You are a virus! I can't believe I ever married you! Enjoy that, did you? I do feel like I'm getting my money's worth.
They were pissed.
Yeah.
I was at the party with Mia.
Vince was flirting with her all night, bringing her drinks.
Did you see Mia go into Vince's dorm room? She cut her finger opening a beer, and Vince offered to get her a band-aid.
I bumped into her about an hour later outside of her dorm.
She was crying.
And she told me that Vince forced her to have sex.
Were you surprised when Vince wasn't arrested? The school treats the football players like rock stars.
They get all sorts of free stuff furniture, electronics, the best dorm rooms.
They get away with anything.
And Vince is the worst.
He's he's completely self-absorbed.
I mean, just check his Twitter feed.
He talks about himself in the third person.
Uh, thank you.
Allie were you ever romantically involved with Vince? I I hooked up with him once.
Do you remember when? Sure do.
It was Valentine's day.
I never heard from him again.
Valentine's day.
Ouch.
Would you say that gives you an incentive to testify against him in court? - Objection.
- Goes to bias, Your Honor.
I'll allow it.
No, no.
I I don't hold a grudge.
The only reason I'm here is because he raped my best friend and the university did nothing about it.
Nothing further.
Bingum.
How was court? Okay.
I still need to prove that the university covered up the rape, and I'm not there yet, but We need to talk about what happened here yesterday.
- We do? - Mm-hmm.
Oh, God.
Fine.
It was unprofessional, disruptive, very upsetting - I couldn't agree more - and unhygienic.
And you lost me.
What is it that you think we're talking about here? You and Bobbi Dobkins in your office.
You're upset about that? We were behind closed doors.
Next time, lock them.
Don't worry.
There won't be a next time.
At least not with Bobbi.
Wait.
I I thought things were going great with you two.
Okay, not really your business, but I am ending it.
No.
No, you ca now she cares about you.
Okay, did you hear the part where I said "not really your business"? Wait.
What did you think we needed to talk about? You and Grayson going all barroom brawl in the bullpen.
- We had a legal disagreement.
- You scared the temps.
You're the senior attorney.
Go make nice.
Do you have a minute? Sure.
Hello, Ms.
Bingum.
Are you freaking kidding me?! Oh, it's not what it looks like.
What a relief, because it looks like you're meeting with opposing counsel behind my back! Jane, would you calm down? Do not tell me to calm down! Grayson, stay the hell out of my case! Oh! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Come on! It's time to scream! All bow down to the football team! Hey, hey.
Hey, what's going on? Grayson? Whoa.
Well, get with the program, Jane.
Go, Hammet! Yeah! Hammet! Hammet! Maybe the dream has nothing to do with the case and you simply miss the good old days.
No, that's not it.
I'm mad at Grayson.
Mm.
He chose his college over my client.
He loves that place.
Oh.
And you remember that Hammet sweatshirt he wore every day until you "accidentally" gave it to a homeless person? That's the thing.
Has Grayson changed, or has he always been like that and I just didn't notice? Grayson's one of the good guys, Jane.
Yeah, well, you know what? Maybe there are no good guys.
Maybe that's a myth.
Why are you talking like that? Parker's dumping Bobbi.
Ohh.
Well, you must feel relieved.
No.
I feel horrible.
He's gonna break my mom's heart, and there's nothing I can do about it.
Well, maybe you're wrong about that.
I can't force Parker to date her.
No, but you can protect Bobbi's feelings.
Remember in high school when you were dating Dennis Burke and I told you that I saw him wearing socks with sandals? Ugh! Big fashion faux pas.
I had to break up with him.
Exactly.
But Dennis never wore socks with sandals.
I heard that he was going to dump you, so I created a perfect lie so you would dump him first.
That is the sweetest thing ever.
Mm.
Thank you.
Now we have to tell her something about Parker that's a deal-breaker.
- Mm.
- Oh! I've got it.
He listens to Justin Bieber.
She's got Bieber fever.
Oh.
How about he put himself through law school as a female impersonator? Yeah, but she'd just want to dress him up and take him out for karaoke at mother lode.
Oh.
Oh, I've got it.
Ooh.
And if I hurry, I can catch her while she's still ordering her post-yoga chai latte.
Thank you, Stace.
He hunts? Big-time.
Well, what kind of animals? Um, what kind? Um, furry ones.
I mean, bunnies and raccoons Bambi.
- Really? - Yeah.
And someone said something about you being a member of PETA and that you've dabbled in veganism, so I just thought you should know.
I see.
He decorates his Tahoe cabin with their pelts.
Well, this is awful.
Mm-hmm.
And I've got to get going.
Okay.
Pelts? I know.
I mean, it's not my thing, but Just when you think you know someone Yeah.
Doug? What are you doing here? Did you have a change of heart? No.
But my fiancée did.
She made it pretty clear that we were not pushing our wedding over a stupid clock.
I just hate that Jenna won.
No, you won.
Now Jenna will sign the divorce papers, and you can start a new, happy life.
Doug will you tell your fiancée that I'm sorry? You know, not all Kaswells are so Stubborn? Yeah, that's one way to put it.
Okay, I looked at all of Vince's tweets.
The guy is a total ass.
He raffles off the chance for some lucky coed to do his laundry.
Ew.
That's awful.
But here's what we need one key to proving rape is illustrating the guy's mental state, his intent.
So I thought if we looked at his Twitter feed around the time of the rape, we might find something relevant.
Well, tell me if this is relevant.
On the morning of the rape, he tweeted the number 9.
I went backwards in time, and over the last six months, he's tweeted 1 through 8.
On Valentine's day, he was at 7.
- The day he had sex with Allie.
- Yeah.
He's been keeping count of his sexual conquests on Twitter.
That is disgusting.
And very relevant.
What I don't understand is next to each number, there's an Internet link.
And when I click on the link, watch what happens.
"Dancing in the end zone"? It's football-player code for "getting some.
" Vince is a pig.
Can I talk to you for a minute? I have nothing to say to you.
Then you can listen.
I wasn't talking to Thurmond behind your back.
I was in the process of deciding whether to throw him out the window or down the stairs - when you showed up.
- What did he want? My help in convincing you to stop your suit.
Which proved to me he had something to hide.
I see.
Look, I admit I'm a big fan of my Alma Mater.
But there's a difference between school spirit and blind allegiance.
I don't want you to think I don't understand that.
You care what I think? Of course.
From the day I met you.
Thank you.
Now I think you're due in court.
Yes.
How about I join you as second chair? Yeah.
So, Mia you had no reservations about going to a guy's room alone? No.
It's a coed dorm.
We all hang out together.
So you thought you would get the band-aid for your finger and then just go back to the party? Yes.
But that's not what happened.
Once we got to his room, he started kidding around.
He held the band-aid up like "come and get it.
" When I reached for it, he pulled me in, and he kissed me.
And I was like, "Whoa, dude.
I I didn't come here for that.
" When he tried to kiss me again, I told him to cut it out, and I headed for the door.
Why didn't you leave? He grabbed me by the arm hard and he shoved me onto the bed.
I tried to get up, but he got on top of me.
It's okay.
Just take your time.
I couldn't push him off.
I kept telling him "no," but he just kept on going.
Since when are you a football fan? I hate the sport.
They should call it "let's give each other brain damage.
" This is for the case.
It's that quarterback's website.
"Dancing in the end zone"? It's a euphemism for "sex.
" - Why is he throwing the ball out of bounds? - What? His body is facing the end zone, but his wrist is off axis.
Look.
Watch.
Follow the cursor.
Holy crap.
It's an easter egg.
You lost me.
Uh, it's a hidden link.
See, the football is superimposed onto the photo, and it's a gateway to a secure site.
Here.
Try a a password.
Try "football.
" Huh.
Try "jock.
" Or how about "strap"? How about I get a subpoena? Nice work, Freddy.
That works.
Hey, the clock.
I take it this means you won.
Yeah.
More like the other side surrendered.
What's going on, Kim? Nothing.
I got dragged into my sister's drama again.
This is why I only want to see her at holidays.
Family can't pick 'em, you can't kill 'em.
Best you can do is get caller I.
D.
and train the receptionist to keep them out of the office.
Big sis incoming.
Jenna.
Ugh.
Kimmie, you are the best.
I've always said so.
No, you haven't.
Well, no one's really asked.
Congrats.
Now you can sleep.
Yeah.
Right.
Whatever.
What are you doing?! You're gonna break it! I just got to pry this open.
Oh, my God.
You never cared about the clock.
Mnh-mnh.
But have you ever seen uncut diamonds before? Thank you, grandma Daisy.
I don't understand.
Doug's great-great-grandmother was a very smart woman.
She knew that men are idiots who can't be trusted.
So she hid diamonds in this clock as a safety net in case the men screwed up.
It's a secret she passed down daughter-to-daughter.
And then Doug's grandmother passed it down to me.
'Cause Doug doesn't have any sisters and his mother passed away a while ago.
Yeah, and for a minute there, she actually thought I was an angel.
I don't understand.
Why would you go through all this? Why wouldn't you just take the diamonds out after she told you about them? I really didn't think I would need them.
You know, he's the only man who ever told me I was beautiful, right? He's an idiot.
Anyway, I actually believed Doug when he said he was in love with me, and then he sprung this divorce on me.
By the time I got home, he'd put everything in storage.
He probably thought you'd burn it all.
Well, I did buy gasoline.
I know you're judging me, Kim, but I'm not like you.
I do facials in the back of a salon, and I'm not very good at it.
So now I have a safety net for my daughter.
Wait, Jenna.
Don't you want your clock? No.
I don't want anything that reminds me of Doug.
Mia, you've testified that Vince was "wasted" on the night in question, but he wasn't the only one drinking, was he? - I had one beer.
- Really? These photos were pulled from your friends' Facebook pages.
Here you are.
Here you are again.
And again.
Ms.
Dalton, another photo from the party.
Who's that guy? That's Vince.
Eight months ago, did you post on your Facebook page "I love you forever, Vince"? He won the big game.
Cheerleaders support the football players.
Right.
Is that why you had sexual intercourse with two other players before Vince? Your Honor! Sexual history is irrelevant under rape shield laws.
This is a civil case, not a criminal one, counselor.
He's right.
Answer the question.
One of the players was my boyfriend.
We went out for a year.
And when he ended it, didn't you seek counseling at health services because you were so depressed, you even threatened to harm yourself? There was more to it than that.
I'm sure there was.
Let's get back to Vince.
The day after you two had sex, did you call up Vince? - Yes, because - Did he return your calls? - No, but - Didn't that make you angry? - Well, yes, be - Because he was over you.
Objection! Overruled.
Ms.
Dalton, you'll go to any extreme when you don't get your way, isn't that right? Your Honor, please! I've got no further questions.
Hey.
How's Mia doing? She told me she wishes we never brought the complaint, and now she wants to quit school.
Sorry.
Everyone thinks she's the campus whack job, and the guy who rapes her is a hero.
I mean, who can blame her? I got it.
"Score12.
" - What? - The password to Vince's website.
We subpoenaed the company that contracts the university server.
"Score12" 12 is the number on his, um outfit.
- It's a jersey.
- Whatever.
Check it out.
Type it in.
Dates, numbers, icons my God.
It's a sexual table of contents.
Video icons correspond to each sexual encounter.
Allie and Mia never said anything about being taped.
Well, they probably didn't know.
I mean, it's really easy to flip on a laptop cam without your partner knowing.
I'm just saying.
Could he really be that stupid to record a rape? He probably didn't think she'd say no.
Well, he was smart enough to delete the videos.
Yeah, we subpoenaed his personal computer, and that was wiped clean.
I think we should call the quarterback to the stand.
Grayson, this is all circumstantial.
We don't have any hard evidence.
Let me work on that.
Kim.
W what are you doing? It's yours.
And you should take it before she changes her mind.
Wow.
Thanks.
Come in.
Please.
Can I get you something to drink? No, thank you.
But you can tell me what you did with the real diamonds.
What? Come on, Doug.
Cut the crap.
Unlike my sister, I know what uncut diamonds look like, and that bag of rocks she pulled from the clock were mostly quartz.
Is she in the car? No.
I haven't told her.
But you did switch them, didn't you? And then you fought for the clock so she wouldn't catch on.
Oh! Wow.
Now, these are real.
When I told my grandmother that I was gonna leave Jenna, she told me about the clock.
And she was adamant that Jenna not get her hands on these.
Well, technically, they don't belong to you.
They belong to my daughter.
And I'm keeping them safe for her.
I was hoping you'd say that.
I drew up a trust stating as much.
Ella gets the diamonds when she turns 18.
A trust? When Jenna finds out that she's got fakes, she could pierce the arbitration agreement and take half.
Why are you doing this? My client wants financial security for her daughter's future, and that is what I'm giving her.
Vince, I'm gonna get right to the point.
Do you secretly videotape your sexual conquests - and post them online? - Objection! There's no proof Vince videotaped anything.
A little leeway, Your Honor.
If I can establish that such tapes exist, we'll know exactly what occurred on the night in question.
Okay, but watch your step.
Why don't I start with an easier question? Vince, did you buy your own laptop? Uh, no, ma'am.
The school gave it to me.
It was part of my sports scholarship.
You're aware it was subpoenaed? Yeah.
The hard drive was empty no term papers, no photos, no music, no videos.
Nothing that an average college student would have.
Why? Must be a glitch.
You know, I'm I'm a jock.
I'm I'm not so good with computers.
Oh.
Yeah? Well, I guess it could have been a glitch.
Or maybe you wiped it clean when you heard you'd have to turn it over.
Objection.
In what world does an empty hard drive prove there were sex tapes? Ms.
Bingum, he's right.
Is that all you have? Vince, are you aware that the university has an automatic passive backup system for every school-issued computer? In jock speak, everything on your computer was punted to the backup system.
Uh no.
No, I wasn't aware of that.
Your Honor, we'd like to request a court order to immediately access the server.
Objection.
We need time to research and file a Memo of Law.
Do you mean you need time to erase the backup? Overruled.
Access the server.
Mr.
Thurmond's second chair works for the university and has a laptop.
I imagine he could access the server in minutes.
Don't you dare.
You didn't just instruct your associate to disobey my order? Unless you want to be held in contempt, access the server now.
I think you should do what he says.
Click on Vince's football and type in "Score12.
" Oh.
Look.
There they are.
Vince, you testified that you and Mia had consensual sex.
Before we watch "video number 9" from your website, would you like to change your answer? Oh.
I think he wants you to invoke the fifth amendment.
But I think you should tell the truth.
Why did you remove the videos from your website and the laptop? He said he would take care of it.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Who said that? My lawyer.
Do you mean the university's lawyer? Same guy.
No more questions.
The university just called with a settlement.
They are revamping their date-rape policies Good.
Thurmond is facing criminal charges, and Vince is suspended, pending trial for sexual assault.
You did well.
Thank you.
I did have some help.
Well I'm really sorry about your school.
Hey.
It's not my family.
It's just a bunch of buildings.
Well, all right, any bunch of buildings that sent a guy like you out into the world can't be that bad.
Oh.
I'll grab you a drink to celebrate.
All right.
- Bobbi.
- Hi.
Hi.
Hi, hi, hi.
Oh.
Thank you for the call.
I did not want to be home tonight.
You look gorgeous.
Oh, good.
That was the plan.
I broke up with Parker, and I wanted to leave him with a twinge of regret.
Oh.
You broke up with him? Oh, please.
Parker was going to break up with me, and you were just giving me the heads-up.
- Uh - The closest that man ever comes to hunting is ordering a prime rib at the Palm.
So you knew what I was doing? The preemptive breakup.
I practically invented it.
Oh, Jane.
What was I thinking? With a younger man? Deb would have been appalled.
Maybe.
Or maybe she would have been happy that you were happy.
Are you sure you didn't know her? Ladies what are we drinking to? Uh to happiness.
To the preemptive breakup.
In English? To Deb.
That one, I get.
To Deb.