The Magicians (2016) s03e08 Episode Script

1 Previously on "The Magicians" Fray isn't yours.
Your real daughter died during childbirth.
She died? - All right, I can help you.
- Is that cocaine? It's the excretion of a very rare magical creature.
[SNIFFS.]
- Penny, Sylvia.
- I'm babysitting now? Sylvia is your supervisor.
If you can't bring me back, you die too, Penny.
Benedict do not do it! No! Mmm yummy.
Children of Earth have been making a mess of things here for some time.
She planned this.
I'm your queen, you motherfuckers! [TENSE MUSIC.]
- What are you doing? - Short-circuiting your panic attack.
Wait a minute, I I I know these people.
Well, every book is here, all the books of all the people who ever lived.
It's not like I can just travel to the Underworld.
So we need a gatekeeper.
What about the Library's dragon? They call it the Bookwyrm.
I hear they use it to send books to and from the Underworld.
Well, what if the person was a book? Say I get the Key and send it back up, it's stuck in the Satellite Library.
We need another traveler.
Okay, I work with this group now.
It's kind of about freedom of information.
You have to go, if that's what you wanna do.
I'm sorry we're cursed.
[PENCIL SCRATCHING.]
[ELEVATOR RATTLES, DRONES.]
[GRUNTS.]
Damn it! [SOLEMN MUSIC.]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
Hey, uh, guy Yeah, what is this? Temp housing, and before you ask, yes, the system is still down.
Rations arrive Tuesday.
Smoking is prohibited.
The outhouses to your left.
Outhouses here? No, look, I I'm - I'm just looking for someone.
- Did you file a request? You'll have to hand-deliver it to the Underworld Hotel.
This is an emergency, okay? I really, really can't wait.
I might be able to help, unofficially, if, uh Yeah, uh what the hell do you bribe dead people with? Uh is there money here? And what about the White Walkers? Oh, the White Walkers? Yeah, I mean, those guys are bad news.
You know, but then the British-sounding dude came and, uh, you know, kicked their asses, so - W wait, who was that? - You know! You know, dope outfit.
Speaks in rhymes.
Has eight dragons.
Where did he get so many dragons? I mean that's the question.
So, you know, he came in and, uh, won the throne game.
Well, no one does a twist like they do.
[CHUCKLES.]
Okay, what's your friend's name? Hi, um, I'm looking for Benedict.
- Go away.
- Benedict? I'm dead! Go away! It's it's Penny.
Oh, Penny, my friend! Oh okay.
Um Good hug.
Yeah, let's call this, man.
You can't imagine how terrible this place is.
I'm so happy to see you.
That isn't to say I'm I'm I'm sorry you're dead.
Oh, yeah, about that: No, I'm I'm not technically, uh I came to find you.
- You did? - Yeah.
- Oh! - Okay, we're - and we're hugging again.
- [GIGGLES.]
When you died, were you holding a key? [INHALES SHARPLY.]
Are you here for the key? - Yeah, do you have it? - I thought you, uh because we were friends, that, um Oh, um Yeah, look, we're not not friends.
It's just, you know, I'm I'm on a mission, and and if we are friends - I am your friend! - Then give me the key uh, please? [CHUCKLES.]
- They they took it.
- Who? Well, the Library.
Of course.
[LAUGHS.]
Fuck me.
I just snuck out of there.
Damn it! Well, the Library's the only part of the Underworld that functions now.
It's well-protected.
I'd say just cut your losses.
There's no way you can get in there.
Yeah, there is.
I'm a Librarian.
Currently on the lam from a billion-year contract.
Oh, well, like I said best let go of it.
[SIGHS, CHUCKLES.]
Of all of magic? Would you let that go? Oh, well, I'll figure it out, find the Key, avoid indentured servitude Oh, even in death, you lead an exciting life.
I'll I'll help.
- No no, that's okay.
- I insist! I can help you sneak.
I can Great.
Yeah! We'll go together.
I just you know, I just need to find one more person And then, uh, we'll loop back and grab you in ten, okay? - Okay, no hugging.
- [CHUCKLING.]
Okay.
- All right.
- I'll be here.
- I'm gonna go this way.
- Okay.
- Hi, Penny.
- Sylvia? You're about to do something stupid.
I'm sorry for leaving you behind in Oh, you mean in the Poison Room? God, I was a goner.
- I'm not mad.
- I am.
Well, don't be.
I'm fine, well, for a dead girl.
You, on the other hand, are not doing so hot, between the stuck-in-the-astral thing and the 'bout-to-fuck-up-royally thing.
How do you know I'm Oh, the same way I knew that you were here right now.
- It is written.
- What is that? Trust me, your best bet of finding that key is with the person who wrote these pages.
Follow me.
[SLOW, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC.]
Cassandra? I brought a friend.
Alice? [SHRIEKS.]
Cassandra, calm down.
It's okay.
- It's okay.
- What the hell is going on? Cassandra doesn't like to see anybody that she writes about.
I'm sorry, but she just looks exactly like a friend of mine, who, last time I checked, was still alive.
I don't know what to tell you.
She's been here thousands of years.
- [WHISPERS.]
Make him go away.
- I can't.
He needs your help.
[WHIMPERS SOFTLY.]
Here's the deal: - Cassandra has a gift.
- A curse.
She kinda got involved with this guy God.
And it didn't end well, and he was pissed, so he gave her magical sight.
She can see the future.
This should sound familiar, if you've read any ancient myths.
The one that no one believed and it drove her batshit crazy? Quiet, squirrels.
I guess some Librarians found her and got her to start writing everything down.
Wait, she's the person that writes the books of the people in the Library? Well, yes and no.
She can only write one at a time.
So, at some point, the Librarians wrote a spell to, like, industrialize her thing, and that's how all books were written.
That stopped when magic did, and now it's just her, one book at a time.
Trying to concentrate.
Anyway, I take her pages to the Bookwyrm, and I read that you were here, and then, I read that I come to help you, and so I did, and here we are.
Out of 7 billion people in the world, she's writing about me? Well, you and your buds are on a quest to restore magic, making you maybe our only hope.
- No presh.
- So, what do we do? Do we just do we just wait for her to maybe write about the lost key? [PAPER SCRUNCHING.]
This one seems to be about Poppy and Quentin [GROANS.]
God, it's a sex scene.
I'm worried that the plan won't work.
Well, that means my plan definitely didn't work.
What plan is that? The one where I bang the panic right out of you.
I don't know how Harriet thinks we pull this off.
It's incredibly dangerous, and I don't think that we are fully you know, equipped.
I assure you, Quentin, I'm fully equipped.
I can't ask you to risk your life for my quest.
[SIGHS.]
Real talk, I'm a very self-interested person, and I want magic back.
And how do we know it's not my quest too? Maybe I'm the second act add-on that saves the world.
Maybe you have to bring me or you totally fail, hmm? I don't think that's how this works.
[SIGHS.]
If it's such a bad idea, then why are you going? Because it's the opposite of what I usually do.
A quest is supposed to change a quester.
The person who starts it couldn't, you know, finish it.
So run a gauntlet to get the keys, and the gauntlet is what makes you the guy that can get the keys? Exactly.
I know what I have to be to win this quest: a hero.
I also know what I am, which is not that, so Okay I reject your whole premise.
That's all people do: try to change.
The real me is an asshole with no filter.
Believe me, I tried.
Eventually, I realized the brave thing is to be you and accept the consequences.
Who's to say that isn't the key to the quest? [SOFT STRING MUSIC.]
Shit's about to get awkward, huh? Oh, because you slept with Q? Yeah, I'm not really worried about his penis right now.
I'm more worried about how he's about to get killed.
- Robbing the Library? - Oh.
How are you even gonna get there? We have a traveler: Victoria.
But how's she gonna travel you? That part's a spell.
Yeah, so, we're not doing that.
- Travelers are magical creatures - They're technically hybrids.
Fine, whatever.
All I know is that we can use her DNA.
She's gonna build a Mirror Bridge.
- All we need is, uh - PHD-level skill and patience and more traveler blood than she has in her entire body.
Exactly.
Look, I know the physics of Mirror Bridges - from when I was a - Sociopathic energy monster? Yeah.
Bridges are usually built between hedge witch safe houses a hundred miles apart, max.
Well, we're better than hedges.
Light years better? You do know that the distance changes the metamath, right? So if you're not perfect, Victoria dies.
- Forget it.
I'm out.
- Okay, hold on.
I was on the fence when it sounded semi-safe.
Now it sounds a lot like I could get everyone killed.
We don't do it until we get the math right, and I'll make sure that None of us understands how the Bridge works.
Alice does.
Get her to do the math, we can talk.
She said, "I already talked to Alice.
She's not gonna help.
" Look, it's simple.
Prove to me the Bridge will be stable, or I'm out.
Victoria, wait Oh, shit.
Fuck.
What do we do now? [MOUTHS WORDS.]
What is she after? - Harriet? - What do you mean? If we're gonna risk our lives to help her, we deserve to know why.
Okay.
Library's been searching for this thing called the Alexandria Cell.
It's a huge battery.
Librarians from ancient Egypt made it, and if they followed the plans, it is fucking massive.
And Harriet thinks that they found it? Or her people saw Librarians doing magic on Earth, big magic.
But none of it matters if we can't get to the Satellite branch.
[SOLEMN MUSIC.]
Niffin notes.
Pages and pages about Mirror Bridges.
How did how did you convince her to help us? Didn't.
I stole them.
I'll make copies and put them back before she comes home from wherever she went to sulk and be a martyr.
No, this is this is not a good idea.
Under the circumstances, it seemed worth it.
See? Just had to be myself.
[GROANS.]
Okay Be careful when you step through.
[DARK AMBIENT MUSIC.]
[GROANS.]
Okay.
I have to stay and feed the sigils, so, you know, take your time.
We'll hurry.
Thank you, Victoria.
[EERIE PERCUSSIVE MUSIC.]
[GRUNTING SOFTLY.]
Okay, she says, "Go left down the hall.
" Said, "You'll find the book drop chute.
" "The Bookwyrm's inside.
" Okay.
Wait, have you been here before? [MOUTHING WORDS.]
Well, okay well, let's go before Victoria bleeds out.
Come on.
Penny said he'd hide it in a book.
[SHUSHING.]
[APPREHENSIVE MUSIC.]
[MUTTERING.]
Make sure to check the chute.
Might be stuck.
[DRAGON GROWLING.]
Okay, no books.
Just an actual dragon.
Ooh.
Uh God damn it, we don't have time.
[CHUTE RATTLES.]
Oh, fuck it.
- Hello? - Key's not here.
What? [SIGHS.]
So, Penny failed? Shit.
Uh, maybe he did.
I Well, we can't just stand here and wait.
No, we need the key.
I just realized my part to play in this quest.
I'm here to tell you it is time to cut bait and run.
- Just live another day.
- No, we can't.
- Kady and Harriet - They are on their own trip, and call me crazy, but I don't think any of this is worth Victoria's life.
[SIGHS.]
[TENSE MUSIC.]
Alice, what the hell? - Come on, we gotta go.
- [STAMMERS.]
- Where are they? - I don't know.
Come with me.
No, they'll be stuck.
Do what you need to do.
[GASPS.]
[GROANS, PANTS.]
This can't be right.
The key's not there.
Quentin's about to bail without me.
Well, "about to": That means that there's still a chance.
A lot of this is still in the future, so And what the hell is Alice is doing in the Satellite branch? You'd think she could at least answer that.
Alice, if you're in there, please Where is the key? Fuck.
Here's a bright idea: Keep fucking reading.
- We're better than hedges.
- Light years better? You do know the distance changes the metamath, right? If you're not perfect, Victoria will die.
Then help.
Look, bottom line, Alice, you told Poppy the Mirror Bridge won't work.
Now Victoria's not gonna help.
It won't work.
Would you rather I didn't tell her and just let you guys walk off into deep space? She asked, "Have you been to the Library?" Once.
I wasn't there long.
"Brochure makes it sound great.
"They collect knowledge, keep it safe but from who?" Whom.
I said "whom.
" "The Library buries information.
"Only the people they choose get access.
The rest of us" You just wanna let all that knowledge loose for anyone to use? For good or bad? "Don't tell me there isn't a book in the Library "you wouldn't die to read.
"If you help us, we can offer you a piece of what we find there.
" What's that? The biggest battery ever created.
You wanna help Penny? This is how.
If I say yes, that means risking lives to give you power maybe no one should have.
No thank you.
[CLOCK RUMBLES.]
[RUMBLING.]
Door was stuck.
Can I have one of those? So, I left.
Just needed a little space from the ol' ball and cock.
[SNICKERS.]
It's "ball and chain," I think you mean.
No, that doesn't sound right.
I think I know what you mean.
I lost a lot of people recently, including kind of myself.
Mm.
That makes no sense.
I had everything.
I knew everything there was to know in every book and more, and and I lost it.
I'm sorry You think that's the same kind of problem at all? My daughter's gone forever.
You forgot some stuff? What you lost is still out there.
Go get it back.
Umber's ass, I am drunk.
Oh, Christ.
No.
The answer's no.
You don't even know what I want.
You're a Library groupie.
You got a knowledge boner.
How'd you find out about this place anyway? - It was Karen.
- What? N no, Penny told me.
Bad news, book tart.
The Library's closed, indefinitely.
I got bored waiting.
Look, I need to speak to your boss.
I have something she'll want.
Oh.
[CHUCKLES.]
You're so mysterious.
It's important, asshole.
Fine.
Come on then.
Wait, this shouldn't work without Wellspring magic.
How can you [GASPS.]
[DARK AMBIENT MUSIC.]
Alice Quinn.
Till we meet again, book tart.
If you're his supervisor, I wanna file a complaint.
Roguish belligerency is a common trait among travelers.
How can he take people with him when he travels? You really do have a battery.
Is that why you're here? No, I don't care about the battery.
Well of course I do.
All I want is a Library Card.
We're no longer accepting new applications.
What do you know about niffins? I was one for a time, and this is all I can remember.
It's half of a puzzle.
The other pieces fell out of my head, but they could be inside your books.
You are suggesting a trade of information? More than that.
I wanna finish what I started: a Grand Unified Theory of Magic.
But you're just a human Magician with no magic now.
I'm afraid your experiences as a niffin have already been documented to our satisfaction.
[SOFTLY.]
It's in my book.
You don't want me to finish.
Is is that it? There is something you could do for us, and, in exchange, we would give you full access to our collection.
You're familiar with the Quest for the Seven Keys? [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING.]
Excuse me a moment.
[SIGHS.]
[TENSE MUSIC.]
Alice, what the hell? Come on, we gotta go.
- What are you doing here? - What am I doing here? How do you just keep appearing? What were you Alice, are you working with the Library? Q, you have to go.
Okay, great, then let's go.
Alice, come on.
Q, please [SIGHS.]
The bookish girl joins the Library.
Didn't see that coming.
Yeah, little bit of a bigger problem.
Quentin left without the key! This is it, right? An actual answer? Yes, I do want to make a final statement.
I hate Fillory.
It is a backwards, malodorous shithole full of animals who are smarter than they're supposed to be and humans who are so much dumber.
And what you'd call indoor plumbing, we on Earth would call a war crime.
But when I was drowning, Fillory saved me, and now it's my turn to save Fillory.
But I can't do that if my head's in a basket, so if it pleases the [TENSE MUSIC.]
You guys I demand that this trial/peasant uprising be dismissed Your honorable wombat-ness.
What the shit is this? Why is he talking to a marsupial? - This is not at all relevant! - Would you just chill? - You're gonna piss her off again.
- Next! [KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
[DOOR OPENS, SQUEAKS.]
How's Alice? Uh, well, she's not my favorite person at the moment, but, um, the transfer worked, so thank you.
Oh, well, I'm glad to hear it.
- Yeah.
- Uh so you're Yeah, back to powered up.
Good because I've, uh, come here to collect on that favor that you owe me.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Side-effect from the powder that I gave you.
- Um - Oh, don't worry.
No, you haven't used nearly enough.
No, you're safe.
Look, there is a treatment, but it's big magic.
I I can't do it on myself, because it would just make things worse.
So Here's what we'll need.
My office, 3:00 p.
m.
A fairy? And I can't see her, because I've never made a fairy deal? - This is what they do - Okay? They hide behind powerful people, manipulate them into doing terrible things Wait a minute, at Irene's house, Penny said that he he thought that he saw something moving that that Q and I couldn't see.
There's more of them? Oh, no.
No, what I'm what I'm saying is I'm not so sure that they're manipulating much of anything.
They were doing chores.
- Wait, what was Irene's fairy doing? - Just standing there, like she was waiting on Irene, and her head was sort of bowed, but Bowed? Wait, that's I mean, that kind of sounds like a servant.
You can't trust them.
I don't know why they'd be acting that way, but Do you have slavery in Fillory? If these fairies are slaves, you'd be better off.
Fen no one is better off with slavery.
Look, I have this tiny spark of magic, and it seems like when I use it to do good things, to help people, it it grows.
I didn't ask for it, and I can't get rid of it.
If I want it to be anything but a burden, I have to use it.
My daughter's dead because of them.
Fen, we need to know, and I can't see her.
You need to talk to Irene's fairy.
[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC.]
[SPEAKING ARABIC.]
[SIGHS.]
Hey.
What's your name? Yes I can see you.
I'm I'm not supposed to talk to you.
Why not? [WHIMPERS.]
You must answer me.
Irene will be very angry if you don't.
Of course.
Of course.
Um I'm sorry.
- Oh, shit, you are her slave.
- No.
Okay, Miss McAllistair keeps us safe from bad Magicians.
She hides us.
In exchange for what? How is it you can see me? I made a deal.
Well, a deal was made on my behalf with a fairy.
But there are no other fairies.
[CLOCK JINGLES.]
Oh, I'm late.
Miss will be waiting.
Uh can we talk again tomorrow? Miss Irene won't be home.
My name is Skye.
No sign of fairies.
Then let's look in here first.
If, uh, we don't find Skye, we'll have to break into the main house, hope that Irene doesn't come home.
[EERIE MUSIC.]
[GASPS.]
Fen, what is it? What do you see? It's her.
It's Skye.
She's oh, God, they cut off her leg.
[GASPS.]
Hey [SNIFFS.]
It's what the powder's made of.
What happened to you? Who did this? Irene did.
(IMPACT) (DUST FALLING) They left.
The Mirror Bridge is gone.
Alice just talk to me.
Come on.
I'm not Alice.
[SIGHS.]
[DARK AMBIENT MUSIC.]
God damn it! What is it? Quentin and Poppy: sex scene.
That you kinda skimmed, prude.
Um, not that I'm complaining, but, um - Why am I doing this? - What? 'Cause I can only go so long feeling completely alone and worthless, before I break down and do something stupid.
Right.
You're an idiot.
- Quentin? - No, me! Look, I get it.
You didn't want me to bail on you, so you lied, and then I bailed on you anyway.
Be mad.
Don't be stupid.
I buried it.
Sorry.
I spent so much of my life alone, the thought of spending the rest of time I thought you were my friend, and I thought if you couldn't find the key, eventually you'd I don't know What, decide to hang out in your dumb tent? I thought we'd spruce it up together.
[SIGHS.]
Look don't ask me how I know this, but you are the only person who cried when I died.
We are friends, and I appreciate you, so, listen once you show me where the key is buried, Sylvia is gonna take you to the Library map room.
You are going to be very popular.
Well, um, I guess this is it.
[CHUCKLES.]
Well, until the next time I die, anyway.
And I want the record to show that I helped you get that key, making this the second time I saved your ass.
[LAUGHS.]
Oh, my gosh.
Wait whoa, hey, whoa! I need to still need to get in there.
[OMINOUS MUSIC.]
Sylvia? - What did you do? - I'm sorry.
[TENSE MUSIC.]
Alice, what the hell? Alice, are you working with the Library? Q, please [SIGHS.]
- Hey.
- Hey.
[DRAGON GROWLS.]
What was that? It sounded like a dragon barfing.
We gotta get back to the book chute.
Come on.
[DRAGON HISSES, GRUMBLES.]
[GASPING.]
Holy shit! Did you okay.
- Yeah.
- Okay, come on.
Oh, but Penny No, we don't have time.
I'm sorry.
- [GRUNTS.]
- Shit.