Wonderland (2013) s03e08 Episode Script
The Other Woman
Jade reckons at least a week late.
Our lives are about to change forever.
I'd like to know the parameters.
Is it all going to be about the baby now? Running my own place was always the plan but I just got trapped.
We wanted to ask you guys how you would feel about .
.
taking this place on with us.
Oh.
Sorry, I didn't realise you were counting the squares.
This is how much a normal person uses.
I can't even wipe my own ass according to you.
If you publish the story then that's asking Immigration to put us under the microscope.
You don't want me to file it? No.
I won't.
It's an interview with a shift worker.
It's the only window they've got.
How can I be with someone that I can't trust? He shouldn't want to be with other women.
Not when he has you.
You know, being with someone but not being with them fully, it's torture.
You shouldn't waste your time with this guy.
Oh.
You're sweet, Carlos.
Sorry.
I No, that is my fault.
Sorry.
No, it's my fault.
I They're going to be waiting for us at FAT night.
Yeah.
We should go.
Uh Don't you think it's weird if we arrive together .
.
late? Yeah.
Maybe you should go first.
I always share.
Oh! Where have you been? You and Carlos have to decide.
Decide? Well, the vote's tied.
Oh! OK.
And don't vote for mine just because it was the best.
It's between Colette and Dani.
Dani.
A-N-I What?! Oh! Winner of the salmon round with her whole-poached fish .
.
Colette.
Ah, I only have myself to blame.
Yes, you do.
Well done, Colette.
Thank you, thank you, and for everyone I paid not to vote for Dani, your cheque's in the mail.
I knew it! Dude? Any news? Baby isn't coming.
Jill.
Bit tense there, Robert? Why would I be tense, man? I mean, the baby's overly overdue.
Could literally come at any minute.
My ankles are killing me and I haven't slept in days.
Just Hey, where's Carlos? He's still studying - got his exams tomorrow.
Hello, hello! But he should be Hi, mate.
You missed out on the vote.
Oh.
He would've voted for you.
Does it upset your competitive spirit that your wife never wins FAT night? I missed the early bus.
Here you go, guys.
They're probably going to be a little bit cold.
Sorry.
Thanks.
What's your excuse? Uh uh no excuse.
I was I was at Max's.
You OK? You seem a bit something.
Fine.
Just hungry.
Sorry.
This is what they said about preparing for the baby.
I know that's not helpful.
Yeah, I know it's scary but panicking about it is not going to help.
Yeah, well, if that's what the midwife said you should do then that's what you should do.
Sleep's never a bad idea.
Is everything OK? Um, Jade thought the baby was coming but it was just Braxton Hicks.
Who? False alarm.
She's freaking out a little bit, babe.
Just go back to bed.
No.
No, I am.
I'm listening.
Maybe you should try warm milk.
No, I'm not kidding.
Yeah, sure.
Sounds like a good idea.
Hey, sleepyhead.
You been busy dreaming? No.
You alright? Yeah.
You're not going to say anything? About what? About the massive stash of toilet paper that I left on your bed? That was actually just meant to be a dumb joke about being harsh and insensitive about your feelings.
Thanks.
Toilet paper says it all.
OK.
Um, got to get to work.
Oh, sorry.
It's not your fault.
Have a good one.
You too.
So.
Carlos, hey? What? Oh, my God.
Mmm.
Oh, well, it doesn't mention any names.
Yeah, but it's clearly Carlos and Grace.
Guy's on a student visa, witnessed a crime in Rio so he married a professional friend.
He said he wouldn't do this.
Well, obviously your boyfriend changed his mind.
Now, be honest, does this say "bank meeting"? Oh Look.
What? Uh yes.
Stripes say boring and responsible, so, yeah, go with that.
Good.
Right.
I'm off to Mum's.
And then going for a swim.
Hey.
Hey.
Good luck.
Uh OK, look, before you say anything, I've just got off the phone from yelling at the editor, OK? But they're not identifiable.
Photo's just of his back.
You said you wouldn't do it.
Grace was upset.
I know.
And I told them not to run it but they just took the names out and ran it anyway.
My friends could get into some real trouble here.
I won't give up my source.
Now, come on, let's not fight about Carlos and Grace.
Unless we have to.
OK? Good.
Now, are we having breakfast here? Yeah.
Did you, um, make your deadline? Yeah.
It's not great timing.
Mmm.
Your father and I are trying to work out our divorce settlement and things will be sold and divided and I'm not in such a great position myself.
Is this .
.
is this bar really set in stone? I'm meeting the bank today.
And I only just found out that they want guarantor for a new business loan.
But you'd be better off at sticking to what you're good at, love - your furniture design.
Keep emotions out of it.
It's OK if you can't help me but let's just let's just leave it at that.
It's not that I don't want to.
I know.
I know.
It's fine.
I Got to go.
I'll see ya.
I want to support you but this is going to suck.
It's a game.
You love games.
Playing armies with people who make meat pies and sausage rolls for a living .
.
it sounds more weird than fun.
It's the last thing that I want to do but Roxanne needs me and I need the contract.
So we're going to win? No.
No, no, no.
We need to be strategic.
We can't beat Roxanne.
She's super-competitive.
It it'll be corporate suicide to win.
Alright, so, lose but not look like losers.
Exactly.
Let her win but look cool doing it.
Miranda, hi.
I'm actually just on my way to my exam.
Are you OK? Yeah.
Yeah, um, yeah.
Morning.
Morning.
Yes.
Is is Grace home? Come in.
OK.
Um Last night I was feeling emotional.
Yeah.
I was worked up.
I just Yeah, we both were and I feel bad, you know? Guilty about Grace, which is stupid because our marriage isn't real, but Yeah.
I mean, it doesn't matter what Max and my relationship is, I still feel bad and Look.
Let's put it behind us.
It happened and no-one needs to know.
OK.
Good.
Alright.
Good.
Uh have you have you seen this? Oh.
Max couldn't stop it getting published.
You can't recognise me in this picture, can you? I-I don't think so.
Grace? Have you seen the paper? Yeah.
This is a nightmare.
I am going to kill Max.
Look, just try to calm down.
What You posed for a photo.
No-one can tell it's me.
Even if that was a fact, and it's not, it's not the only point.
He obviously doesn't give a rats that we asked him not to submit it.
Do you know what? What's done is done.
Let's just hope we get away with it.
Grace, can I speak to you when you're off the phone? Uh of course.
I have to go.
I think someone has just worked it out.
Look, um, if you're worried about this article, you really shouldn't.
It is my job to worry.
So if this dumb-arse model gets good legal advice and sues, are we exposed? Oh.
Um That, uh No.
No, the quotes in the newspaper today, they put it in public record.
Good.
Why? What article are you talking about? What? Plus, we argued the damage to her rep was already done.
She had an arrest for drug possession as a teen.
We we got done over by a lying journo.
Good.
Newspaper.
Um, I had it.
Uh, uh Sorry.
Can't believe that happened.
Harry! Carlos.
So, still living by your motto? Huh? You know? A day without sex is a day wasted.
Oh.
Yeah.
Being newlyweds, you must be at it like rabbits! No need to stray.
You can tell me.
We're both men of the world.
Harry, I have an exam in 20 minutes so I have to go.
Uh, why do you want his number? Because I'm annoyed.
Yeah, I-I was angry too.
He comes to our dinners.
He hangs with us.
I I guess I just expected a little bit more loyalty from friends.
Miranda? Uh Yeah.
Actually, he didn't he didn't know about it last night.
And also Carlos seemed to be fine about it, so, you know You spoke with Carlos? Um, yeah, just this morning, just about it all.
So, everybody is fine with this except for me? I-I get why you're upset.
Yeah, because it is my career that is on the line if we get exposed.
Right.
Look.
I I'll tell Max to call you, OK? - Coming in.
You better be decent.
- Hey.
Um, there's our financials and the letter of commitment.
Do you need anything else? Uh, no, I think it'll all be straightforward.
We'll either get the money or we won't.
Is that the tie you're going with? What? It's a conservative look.
See what you're doing there.
Mm-hm.
Casual Wednesday? I've got Jade coming over to sign something and have a swim.
She's a little stressed.
Ah.
Good luck.
Yeah.
Right on.
Did I hear you right? Does Jade want you to go swimming with her? Maybe.
She mentioned it.
I don't like the idea of you two hanging out.
Why? 'Cause you're not mates.
She's not your partner.
Babe, it's not a big deal.
Can you please not go swimming? It's pretty simple.
Alright.
I'll let her know when she comes over to sign the contract.
I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
Thank you, John.
And you'll fill in the gap in your work history? Yes.
Thank you.
OK.
Nice tie, by the way.
Ta.
You have no assets.
Yeah, I've got no debt either.
Your car's leased? Yeah, and the lease is up.
Mmm.
And what's the gap in your work history? I was studying.
Ah.
Well, he said that I don't need a guarantor to apply for an extension of my existing business loan.
But that doesn't help US, does it? Here's the plan.
We make it look good.
We go in guns blazing but really we take one for the team.
II don't know about these tactics.
I think we should just impress everyone with our teamwork and try our best.
Trust me - a client may say they want to win fairly but really they just want to win.
Yeah If you love me, then you're going to suck it up and die like a man.
Ah! They've started firing.
Take cover! Harry.
Grace.
Nice office.
What are you doing here? Your favourite.
Milk chocolate.
Who doesn't like rocky road? What's the occasion? Just seemed apt.
Apt? How? "Just when we were travelling smoothly, "life's road sometimes becomes a little rocky.
" Uh this present couldn't have waited until I got home? Not really.
You just didn't happen to be passing with rocky road? Not really.
I, um I don't like seeing you hurt, Grace.
Spit it out, Harry.
I can't just spit it out.
Spit, Harry, spit.
I saw Carlos and Miranda together.
Kissing.
Last night on the beach, I saw them kissing.
I'm sorry.
I Going home? Um, yeah, my stomach's just a bit upset.
I, um I think it might have been the chicken salad I had for lunch.
It was a bit off.
Do you need me for something? I wanted to talk to you about another article in today's paper.
What article? That look .
.
is the one you had when we took your dad's car for a joy ride and dented it.
Oh I'm just not feeling well.
Did you marry Carlos to give him a visa? What? No.
That article in the newspaper today.
It reads like you and Carlos.
Uh, well, I guess they are pretty common circumstances.
You married very suddenly.
Yeah, and and like I told you, I realised I loved him when he was going to leave.
And I believed you then.
And for my own professional reputation, I really want to believe you now.
My marriage is real.
Grace, you know this is compromising for me.
But it's far worse for you if you end up getting reported.
There's nothing to report.
My friend got involved in this case.
He did so believing that you were a genuine couple.
Song, you've got nothing to worry about.
OK? I love Carlos and this is very, very real for both of us.
OK.
Great.
Go home.
Feel better.
I'm here! I see everything! That is not true.
I am not We really just need to stop arguing, OK? It was one phone call! It wasn't one phone call! Hey, listen.
Any moment I'm going to have to leave for the site and we're wasting time here.
So can we just You can't expect Rob to hang out with you whenever.
He's not your husband.
Rob's never said anything.
Look, I don't mind helping out, OK, or going for the occasional swim.
Great, so there's no problem, then.
There has to be notice.
There needs to be structure to this relationship.
You've drawn up a contract.
What more structure do you want? That only covers access to the baby and the money.
I'm talking about everything else.
Is that how you feel, Rob? I don't want to talk about feelings, OK? I just want to sign this and move on.
That'll be the site.
Hello.
Rob speaking.
Yeah, OK, I can be there in 10 minutes.
Yep.
Bye.
Thank you.
But, Jade, maybe just don't go swimming alone, OK? I'll be fine.
Hey.
Um, Grace, I can't really talk right now! Where are you? Um Grace Dani Um, I'm going to have to call you back.
I need to find Steve.
He may be dead.
What? All she can do is think about herself! Which I get.
She's about to give birth.
I just hate that I always end up looking like the bitch.
Well, Rob doesn't think that.
She's the other woman in our marriage.
Well, I I mean, I'm sure she's not trying to be.
There's a whole psychology around women who just go after other women's husbands.
What are you doing? Uh, lipstick shoot for a teen mag.
Ah.
How'd it go? Are we bar owners? I'm not sure.
Turned him down.
I hope not.
Oh, that bar is the one thing that we're doing together without Jade.
I could get a loan for my furniture business and then spend it on the bar.
Although it sounds vaguely illegal.
What do you reckon? Technically bank fraud, and there's nothing vague about it, so if you want to end up in prison, then, yeah, go for it.
What about if I did both? Get a loan for the business.
And use the bar to sell my furniture.
Use the bar like a showroom.
Now, that's that's a pretty grey area.
Grey is good, though, right? Grey is not illegal.
No, but I could call it Bar Stool or something.
That that's actually a pretty good idea.
Yeah.
I mean, it's not a terrible idea.
Uh yeah I I'm surrounded.
Steve? You can't risk your business on some fly-by-night bar.
I just came by to tell you that I've got a loan sorted, OK? Oh.
Darling, all these years, all that work that you've done to keep the workshop and your clients Yeah, I know.
And it's not an extension of the business, no matter how you try to twist it.
This is what I want.
You don't even know how to run a bar.
I grew up on a vineyard! Sasha is a sommelier.
Think of it, if there was two people that were born to run a wine bar, that would probably be us.
I know we can pull this off.
Is Rob back? No.
He's gone out.
He'll be back soon.
My waters broke and I had a contraction on the beach.
Well, how long ago? A few minutes ago.
I'm too scared to drive.
The baby's coming and I mean right now.
Oh.
Rob, it's me again.
Can you please get off the phone and call home? Jade's here.
She's gone into labour.
Oh.
Can I get you anything? Would you like some water or, um? I'll try Rob again.
I'm going.
Where? Home.
I can't wait any longer.
At this time of day, I think it'd be quicker to go to the hospital.
I'm not going to the hospital.
I just mean that the traffic is going to be This is not your baby! You don't decide where I have it.
I'm calling an ambulance.
Ambulance.
Hello? Um, I'm not sure if this qualifies as an emergency but my husband's friend, um, is having contractions.
OH! Um um and I just ARGGH! Oh.
I'm going to have to call you back.
Ah! Make it stop! Contraction already? Um, um Jade, Jade, I just want you to listen to me.
Listen to me.
Just focus on my voice, alright? Block everything else out.
OK, can you do that for me? Um, it's just you and me here.
OK? Nobody else.
Everything's going to be OK.
OK, I'm here.
I'm here.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Thank you.
Alright.
Let's get you to the car.
No, no, no.
I can't go to the car.
Well, I'll carry you.
It's OK.
No, no, no.
I can't have it in the back of the car.
Alright.
What do you want to do? Just stay here.
Just get her upstairs.
OK, come on.
Oh, God.
Oh! OK.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Are you alright? Yeah, I'd call an ambulance.
It's coming? Yep.
It's coming.
Ah.
Oh, God.
Don't sneak up on me like that.
You OK? Yeah.
I really needed this break.
The tension's killing me.
What tension? I got shot in the arm and it really hurt.
I don't want to get shot again.
You got shot in the arm? Yeah.
Dani, look at me.
I'm covered from head to toe.
I've been taking it and taking it.
And thank God I hired a cod cover is all I can say.
Roxanne cheats! Have a rest.
Take a breath.
It's nearly over.
Alright.
I'm going to wee before the killing starts again.
Ahhh! Come on! We're on a break! Alright.
That's it.
You're going to die.
What? Ah! NO MERCY! No, babe, no! AHHH! AHHH! Yeah.
She's drinking water between contractions.
Ah, this doesn't feel right.
Wouldn't the bed be more comfortable? Are you sure? Rob, I think Jade knows what she wants.
OK, here's the juice.
She's going to need a straw for that.
Oh, here comes another one.
Yeah, she's having one now.
Is someone timing this? Uh, yeah, me.
I can't do this.
I can't do this! I know.
It hurts.
No, no, no.
I want to go home.
I'm not ready for this.
Yes, you are.
You're doing great, you're doing great.
I never wanted to do this alone.
I can't do this alone and you want me to sign things! You want you want me Forget all about that.
It doesn't matter.
No, I can't do this.
I can't.
I'm not ready.
Yes, you are.
You can do this.
Rob and I are going to be with you every step of the way.
Absolutely.
And we're not going anywhere after that baby's born.
Absolutely not.
OK? I can't do it.
I'm scared.
We're just going to take it day by day together.
OK? Yeah.
OK.
Oh, should we run a shower? Showers help, don't they? II don't know.
Is this still about Max? No.
This isn't about him.
Well um, what's it about? Going to need those towels! Harry.
What's going on? Baby.
Will you stop smiling? You completely disobeyed orders.
I can't help it.
I like winning as much as you do.
Dani.
Steve.
Baby.
Rob and Colette's.
Oh! Oh, my God! I'll direct the ambulance.
Hey.
Hi.
Hi.
I thought I'd come and take a quick look around, if that's OK.
Of course.
It's it's very hip.
Do you really believe that you can make a go of this? Honestly.
Yes.
I do and so does Tom.
But that doesn't mean it's going to be easy.
We both know that.
It's going to be an uphill battle.
When are you going to stop doing this? What am I doing? This not backing Tom.
I mean, you're encouraging him to just walk away when what he actually needs is to commit to something.
I know you think I stopped him in the past.
No.
No, no, no.
It's not 'think'.
You did.
And it doesn't matter how much you don't like me - he needs to move on.
Sasha, it's not about whether I like you or not.
I don't trust you, to be frank.
You really think I'm trying to screw him over? I think you need Tom more than he needs you.
And he can't see that, so you play on it.
So I'm using him? Sasha, you're asking Tom to tie up his cabinet-making business with this dream of yours I didn't ask him to do that.
That's the upshot.
And he will lose everything if this bar turns out to be a mistake.
But it's Tom's mistake to make, isn't it? I bet you Jade hates Rob right now.
Tom! Childbirth is a beautiful, natural Oh.
She says you have to keep pushing.
No.
It's not coming out.
I can't.
One more big push and then it's over.
You can do it! Trust me.
It's a boy.
It's a boy! Oh, my goodness! Thank you! He's beautiful.
Rob! Hey.
Can I hold him for a sec? Oh, ooh.
# I want to take you somewhere so you know I care # But it's so cold and I don't know where Sorry, but I've got to go with her.
# Daffodils on a pretty string It's OK.
Go.
# But they won't flower like they did last spring # And I want to kiss you and make you feel alright Hey.
Hey, mate, do you mind holding him for a sec? Uh uh yeah.
Just watch his head.
# And I wanna love but all my tears have been used up # On another love, another love Amazing day.
If you say so.
# On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # Oh, oh, oh Here.
Hey.
There we go.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, oh, oh.
Hi! # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up Oh, oh.
You know, don't you? I really don't want to talk about it.
So, um so, Carlos told you? No.
Harry did.
I was pretty shocked too.
Uh Don't blame Carlos for this.
Really? Don't bother.
Miranda, please.
I The only reason we kissed is because I was feeling upset about Max.
I was needing some comfort.
I really don't care about the details.
Yes, you do.
You do, Grace.
Him him kissing me must feel awful.
And I'm sorry that it happened.
But maybe the reason he kissed me is because he can't kiss you.
You you don't know what you're talking about.
Carlos is free to kiss whoever he likes, but we had rules and he broke them.
OK.
Anyway, I've heard you.
And what about Harry? How do you want me to Just You know what? Just leave Harry to me.
We got married so that he could get a visa and stay in the country.
Oh.
Oh! So Yeah.
.
.
it's a sham? Yeah.
I'm sorry.
Awesome.
OK Now that you know, you have to keep it a secret for me.
Oh! Up top.
What was that about? I don't know.
Doesn't matter.
Um There's something I have to tell you and, um .
.
you're not going to be happy.
I .
.
did something that I shouldn't have.
It was a mistake and I regret it.
We both do but it happened and, um I already know.
I was trying to do the right thing No! No, you weren't.
Harry saw you.
We agreed that public displays of affection were out.
Did we not agree on that? Yes.
Because if we didn't, then let me know.
We agreed.
I messed up.
Listen.
I don't live in some fantasy land.
II am under no illusion that this marriage is real.
But nobody else is supposed to know.
And we have a huge problem.
Harry won't tell.
It's not Harry.
Song has read Max's article and she's questioning me.
So thanks for that.
Because now I have to work out how to fix it.
Babies really put things in perspective, don't they? Yeah.
I mean, especially for Rob and Collette.
There's bigger, more important things in life than business and loans and Paintball.
Exactly.
Mmm.
Paintball.
Uh Sorry.
Mum wants to talk to me and Sasha.
Mmm.
Might need another beer.
- Hey.
- Hey.
How is Colette? Upset, mostly.
Wow.
At least someone's happy.
Extremely.
Good! Because that trophy is about all we're going to get out of that experience.
Look, I know there was a plan and I didn't exactly follow that plan but I just .
.
I didn't think you should start your business by throwing the game.
You're better than that.
A lot of good it's going to do me.
OK, so maybe I blew it today but, hey, there are plenty of other .
.
pie-makers in the sea.
You are lucky I love you.
I know.
Ah, Roxanne.
Hi.
Yeah.
Today was fun.
I was just going to call to Uh, OK.
Talk to you soon.
You got it? No.
But she wants to talk.
I told you! I am a genius.
What? So, I've talked to your dad and we've decided to go guarantor on the original business loan.
Seriously? I thought you said you couldn't.
Well, the short version is, for a number of reasons we're putting off selling our assets.
Oh! Mum, thanks, um, but I've already been given the thumbs up for an extension.
But this way you don't have to tie your business to it.
Oh, yeah, I'm OK with that.
It makes more sense to keep it separate.
It's less risky.
Yeah.
We really appreciate that but I think I think we're going to keep things the way they are.
Yeah, you and Warwick, you don't need to be a part of it.
Mmm.
We're doing this.
Yes.
Should I go and get some bubbles? Yes.
I should get some bubbles.
Thank you, though.
How's Jade doing? - Tired? - Tired.
And bossy.
Say hello, baby Shrek.
"Hello, Collette.
"Everyone here thinks I'm a monster, but in a good way.
" You were so great today.
I just I couldn't have done this without you.
You were amazing and you ARE amazing.
You were pretty good too.
I'm the luckiest man in the world to be married to you.
Oh, can you Can you take him for a sec? I need to Yeah.
Do you have to go? Yeah, but I'll, um I'll speak to you in the morning, OK? Bye.
OK.
Bye.
Hi.
Uh, I'm just here for Grace.
Hi.
I brought your dry-cleaning and some lunch.
Do you think that she's going to buy this as proof of anything? Yeah.
Yeah, man, keep it up.
Just lots of little domestic scenes to build our case.
It's not really my idea of newlyweds.
Is she still watching? Yeah, she's down there.
Good.
What was that? Proof.
And more romantic than dry-cleaning.
Um, you can go now.
I've I've got to get back to work.
OK.
Thank you.
Chocolate croissants.
Thanks for coming round.
I didn't expect you to bring breakfast.
Look, if this is still about the article, it's Grace's issue.
I don't get why you care so much.
It's not about the article.
Well Max, I can't be the other woman.
And I can't be with someone who has another woman.
I need to be with someone that's on the same page as me.
You're seeing another guy? No! I kissed someone and I felt so bad, but it made me realise So, um, we should stop seeing each other, then? I mean, that way you can kiss whoever you like with a clear conscience, right? Goodbye.
Our lives are about to change forever.
I'd like to know the parameters.
Is it all going to be about the baby now? Running my own place was always the plan but I just got trapped.
We wanted to ask you guys how you would feel about .
.
taking this place on with us.
Oh.
Sorry, I didn't realise you were counting the squares.
This is how much a normal person uses.
I can't even wipe my own ass according to you.
If you publish the story then that's asking Immigration to put us under the microscope.
You don't want me to file it? No.
I won't.
It's an interview with a shift worker.
It's the only window they've got.
How can I be with someone that I can't trust? He shouldn't want to be with other women.
Not when he has you.
You know, being with someone but not being with them fully, it's torture.
You shouldn't waste your time with this guy.
Oh.
You're sweet, Carlos.
Sorry.
I No, that is my fault.
Sorry.
No, it's my fault.
I They're going to be waiting for us at FAT night.
Yeah.
We should go.
Uh Don't you think it's weird if we arrive together .
.
late? Yeah.
Maybe you should go first.
I always share.
Oh! Where have you been? You and Carlos have to decide.
Decide? Well, the vote's tied.
Oh! OK.
And don't vote for mine just because it was the best.
It's between Colette and Dani.
Dani.
A-N-I What?! Oh! Winner of the salmon round with her whole-poached fish .
.
Colette.
Ah, I only have myself to blame.
Yes, you do.
Well done, Colette.
Thank you, thank you, and for everyone I paid not to vote for Dani, your cheque's in the mail.
I knew it! Dude? Any news? Baby isn't coming.
Jill.
Bit tense there, Robert? Why would I be tense, man? I mean, the baby's overly overdue.
Could literally come at any minute.
My ankles are killing me and I haven't slept in days.
Just Hey, where's Carlos? He's still studying - got his exams tomorrow.
Hello, hello! But he should be Hi, mate.
You missed out on the vote.
Oh.
He would've voted for you.
Does it upset your competitive spirit that your wife never wins FAT night? I missed the early bus.
Here you go, guys.
They're probably going to be a little bit cold.
Sorry.
Thanks.
What's your excuse? Uh uh no excuse.
I was I was at Max's.
You OK? You seem a bit something.
Fine.
Just hungry.
Sorry.
This is what they said about preparing for the baby.
I know that's not helpful.
Yeah, I know it's scary but panicking about it is not going to help.
Yeah, well, if that's what the midwife said you should do then that's what you should do.
Sleep's never a bad idea.
Is everything OK? Um, Jade thought the baby was coming but it was just Braxton Hicks.
Who? False alarm.
She's freaking out a little bit, babe.
Just go back to bed.
No.
No, I am.
I'm listening.
Maybe you should try warm milk.
No, I'm not kidding.
Yeah, sure.
Sounds like a good idea.
Hey, sleepyhead.
You been busy dreaming? No.
You alright? Yeah.
You're not going to say anything? About what? About the massive stash of toilet paper that I left on your bed? That was actually just meant to be a dumb joke about being harsh and insensitive about your feelings.
Thanks.
Toilet paper says it all.
OK.
Um, got to get to work.
Oh, sorry.
It's not your fault.
Have a good one.
You too.
So.
Carlos, hey? What? Oh, my God.
Mmm.
Oh, well, it doesn't mention any names.
Yeah, but it's clearly Carlos and Grace.
Guy's on a student visa, witnessed a crime in Rio so he married a professional friend.
He said he wouldn't do this.
Well, obviously your boyfriend changed his mind.
Now, be honest, does this say "bank meeting"? Oh Look.
What? Uh yes.
Stripes say boring and responsible, so, yeah, go with that.
Good.
Right.
I'm off to Mum's.
And then going for a swim.
Hey.
Hey.
Good luck.
Uh OK, look, before you say anything, I've just got off the phone from yelling at the editor, OK? But they're not identifiable.
Photo's just of his back.
You said you wouldn't do it.
Grace was upset.
I know.
And I told them not to run it but they just took the names out and ran it anyway.
My friends could get into some real trouble here.
I won't give up my source.
Now, come on, let's not fight about Carlos and Grace.
Unless we have to.
OK? Good.
Now, are we having breakfast here? Yeah.
Did you, um, make your deadline? Yeah.
It's not great timing.
Mmm.
Your father and I are trying to work out our divorce settlement and things will be sold and divided and I'm not in such a great position myself.
Is this .
.
is this bar really set in stone? I'm meeting the bank today.
And I only just found out that they want guarantor for a new business loan.
But you'd be better off at sticking to what you're good at, love - your furniture design.
Keep emotions out of it.
It's OK if you can't help me but let's just let's just leave it at that.
It's not that I don't want to.
I know.
I know.
It's fine.
I Got to go.
I'll see ya.
I want to support you but this is going to suck.
It's a game.
You love games.
Playing armies with people who make meat pies and sausage rolls for a living .
.
it sounds more weird than fun.
It's the last thing that I want to do but Roxanne needs me and I need the contract.
So we're going to win? No.
No, no, no.
We need to be strategic.
We can't beat Roxanne.
She's super-competitive.
It it'll be corporate suicide to win.
Alright, so, lose but not look like losers.
Exactly.
Let her win but look cool doing it.
Miranda, hi.
I'm actually just on my way to my exam.
Are you OK? Yeah.
Yeah, um, yeah.
Morning.
Morning.
Yes.
Is is Grace home? Come in.
OK.
Um Last night I was feeling emotional.
Yeah.
I was worked up.
I just Yeah, we both were and I feel bad, you know? Guilty about Grace, which is stupid because our marriage isn't real, but Yeah.
I mean, it doesn't matter what Max and my relationship is, I still feel bad and Look.
Let's put it behind us.
It happened and no-one needs to know.
OK.
Good.
Alright.
Good.
Uh have you have you seen this? Oh.
Max couldn't stop it getting published.
You can't recognise me in this picture, can you? I-I don't think so.
Grace? Have you seen the paper? Yeah.
This is a nightmare.
I am going to kill Max.
Look, just try to calm down.
What You posed for a photo.
No-one can tell it's me.
Even if that was a fact, and it's not, it's not the only point.
He obviously doesn't give a rats that we asked him not to submit it.
Do you know what? What's done is done.
Let's just hope we get away with it.
Grace, can I speak to you when you're off the phone? Uh of course.
I have to go.
I think someone has just worked it out.
Look, um, if you're worried about this article, you really shouldn't.
It is my job to worry.
So if this dumb-arse model gets good legal advice and sues, are we exposed? Oh.
Um That, uh No.
No, the quotes in the newspaper today, they put it in public record.
Good.
Why? What article are you talking about? What? Plus, we argued the damage to her rep was already done.
She had an arrest for drug possession as a teen.
We we got done over by a lying journo.
Good.
Newspaper.
Um, I had it.
Uh, uh Sorry.
Can't believe that happened.
Harry! Carlos.
So, still living by your motto? Huh? You know? A day without sex is a day wasted.
Oh.
Yeah.
Being newlyweds, you must be at it like rabbits! No need to stray.
You can tell me.
We're both men of the world.
Harry, I have an exam in 20 minutes so I have to go.
Uh, why do you want his number? Because I'm annoyed.
Yeah, I-I was angry too.
He comes to our dinners.
He hangs with us.
I I guess I just expected a little bit more loyalty from friends.
Miranda? Uh Yeah.
Actually, he didn't he didn't know about it last night.
And also Carlos seemed to be fine about it, so, you know You spoke with Carlos? Um, yeah, just this morning, just about it all.
So, everybody is fine with this except for me? I-I get why you're upset.
Yeah, because it is my career that is on the line if we get exposed.
Right.
Look.
I I'll tell Max to call you, OK? - Coming in.
You better be decent.
- Hey.
Um, there's our financials and the letter of commitment.
Do you need anything else? Uh, no, I think it'll all be straightforward.
We'll either get the money or we won't.
Is that the tie you're going with? What? It's a conservative look.
See what you're doing there.
Mm-hm.
Casual Wednesday? I've got Jade coming over to sign something and have a swim.
She's a little stressed.
Ah.
Good luck.
Yeah.
Right on.
Did I hear you right? Does Jade want you to go swimming with her? Maybe.
She mentioned it.
I don't like the idea of you two hanging out.
Why? 'Cause you're not mates.
She's not your partner.
Babe, it's not a big deal.
Can you please not go swimming? It's pretty simple.
Alright.
I'll let her know when she comes over to sign the contract.
I'll get back to you as soon as I can.
Thank you, John.
And you'll fill in the gap in your work history? Yes.
Thank you.
OK.
Nice tie, by the way.
Ta.
You have no assets.
Yeah, I've got no debt either.
Your car's leased? Yeah, and the lease is up.
Mmm.
And what's the gap in your work history? I was studying.
Ah.
Well, he said that I don't need a guarantor to apply for an extension of my existing business loan.
But that doesn't help US, does it? Here's the plan.
We make it look good.
We go in guns blazing but really we take one for the team.
II don't know about these tactics.
I think we should just impress everyone with our teamwork and try our best.
Trust me - a client may say they want to win fairly but really they just want to win.
Yeah If you love me, then you're going to suck it up and die like a man.
Ah! They've started firing.
Take cover! Harry.
Grace.
Nice office.
What are you doing here? Your favourite.
Milk chocolate.
Who doesn't like rocky road? What's the occasion? Just seemed apt.
Apt? How? "Just when we were travelling smoothly, "life's road sometimes becomes a little rocky.
" Uh this present couldn't have waited until I got home? Not really.
You just didn't happen to be passing with rocky road? Not really.
I, um I don't like seeing you hurt, Grace.
Spit it out, Harry.
I can't just spit it out.
Spit, Harry, spit.
I saw Carlos and Miranda together.
Kissing.
Last night on the beach, I saw them kissing.
I'm sorry.
I Going home? Um, yeah, my stomach's just a bit upset.
I, um I think it might have been the chicken salad I had for lunch.
It was a bit off.
Do you need me for something? I wanted to talk to you about another article in today's paper.
What article? That look .
.
is the one you had when we took your dad's car for a joy ride and dented it.
Oh I'm just not feeling well.
Did you marry Carlos to give him a visa? What? No.
That article in the newspaper today.
It reads like you and Carlos.
Uh, well, I guess they are pretty common circumstances.
You married very suddenly.
Yeah, and and like I told you, I realised I loved him when he was going to leave.
And I believed you then.
And for my own professional reputation, I really want to believe you now.
My marriage is real.
Grace, you know this is compromising for me.
But it's far worse for you if you end up getting reported.
There's nothing to report.
My friend got involved in this case.
He did so believing that you were a genuine couple.
Song, you've got nothing to worry about.
OK? I love Carlos and this is very, very real for both of us.
OK.
Great.
Go home.
Feel better.
I'm here! I see everything! That is not true.
I am not We really just need to stop arguing, OK? It was one phone call! It wasn't one phone call! Hey, listen.
Any moment I'm going to have to leave for the site and we're wasting time here.
So can we just You can't expect Rob to hang out with you whenever.
He's not your husband.
Rob's never said anything.
Look, I don't mind helping out, OK, or going for the occasional swim.
Great, so there's no problem, then.
There has to be notice.
There needs to be structure to this relationship.
You've drawn up a contract.
What more structure do you want? That only covers access to the baby and the money.
I'm talking about everything else.
Is that how you feel, Rob? I don't want to talk about feelings, OK? I just want to sign this and move on.
That'll be the site.
Hello.
Rob speaking.
Yeah, OK, I can be there in 10 minutes.
Yep.
Bye.
Thank you.
But, Jade, maybe just don't go swimming alone, OK? I'll be fine.
Hey.
Um, Grace, I can't really talk right now! Where are you? Um Grace Dani Um, I'm going to have to call you back.
I need to find Steve.
He may be dead.
What? All she can do is think about herself! Which I get.
She's about to give birth.
I just hate that I always end up looking like the bitch.
Well, Rob doesn't think that.
She's the other woman in our marriage.
Well, I I mean, I'm sure she's not trying to be.
There's a whole psychology around women who just go after other women's husbands.
What are you doing? Uh, lipstick shoot for a teen mag.
Ah.
How'd it go? Are we bar owners? I'm not sure.
Turned him down.
I hope not.
Oh, that bar is the one thing that we're doing together without Jade.
I could get a loan for my furniture business and then spend it on the bar.
Although it sounds vaguely illegal.
What do you reckon? Technically bank fraud, and there's nothing vague about it, so if you want to end up in prison, then, yeah, go for it.
What about if I did both? Get a loan for the business.
And use the bar to sell my furniture.
Use the bar like a showroom.
Now, that's that's a pretty grey area.
Grey is good, though, right? Grey is not illegal.
No, but I could call it Bar Stool or something.
That that's actually a pretty good idea.
Yeah.
I mean, it's not a terrible idea.
Uh yeah I I'm surrounded.
Steve? You can't risk your business on some fly-by-night bar.
I just came by to tell you that I've got a loan sorted, OK? Oh.
Darling, all these years, all that work that you've done to keep the workshop and your clients Yeah, I know.
And it's not an extension of the business, no matter how you try to twist it.
This is what I want.
You don't even know how to run a bar.
I grew up on a vineyard! Sasha is a sommelier.
Think of it, if there was two people that were born to run a wine bar, that would probably be us.
I know we can pull this off.
Is Rob back? No.
He's gone out.
He'll be back soon.
My waters broke and I had a contraction on the beach.
Well, how long ago? A few minutes ago.
I'm too scared to drive.
The baby's coming and I mean right now.
Oh.
Rob, it's me again.
Can you please get off the phone and call home? Jade's here.
She's gone into labour.
Oh.
Can I get you anything? Would you like some water or, um? I'll try Rob again.
I'm going.
Where? Home.
I can't wait any longer.
At this time of day, I think it'd be quicker to go to the hospital.
I'm not going to the hospital.
I just mean that the traffic is going to be This is not your baby! You don't decide where I have it.
I'm calling an ambulance.
Ambulance.
Hello? Um, I'm not sure if this qualifies as an emergency but my husband's friend, um, is having contractions.
OH! Um um and I just ARGGH! Oh.
I'm going to have to call you back.
Ah! Make it stop! Contraction already? Um, um Jade, Jade, I just want you to listen to me.
Listen to me.
Just focus on my voice, alright? Block everything else out.
OK, can you do that for me? Um, it's just you and me here.
OK? Nobody else.
Everything's going to be OK.
OK, I'm here.
I'm here.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Thank you.
Alright.
Let's get you to the car.
No, no, no.
I can't go to the car.
Well, I'll carry you.
It's OK.
No, no, no.
I can't have it in the back of the car.
Alright.
What do you want to do? Just stay here.
Just get her upstairs.
OK, come on.
Oh, God.
Oh! OK.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Are you alright? Yeah, I'd call an ambulance.
It's coming? Yep.
It's coming.
Ah.
Oh, God.
Don't sneak up on me like that.
You OK? Yeah.
I really needed this break.
The tension's killing me.
What tension? I got shot in the arm and it really hurt.
I don't want to get shot again.
You got shot in the arm? Yeah.
Dani, look at me.
I'm covered from head to toe.
I've been taking it and taking it.
And thank God I hired a cod cover is all I can say.
Roxanne cheats! Have a rest.
Take a breath.
It's nearly over.
Alright.
I'm going to wee before the killing starts again.
Ahhh! Come on! We're on a break! Alright.
That's it.
You're going to die.
What? Ah! NO MERCY! No, babe, no! AHHH! AHHH! Yeah.
She's drinking water between contractions.
Ah, this doesn't feel right.
Wouldn't the bed be more comfortable? Are you sure? Rob, I think Jade knows what she wants.
OK, here's the juice.
She's going to need a straw for that.
Oh, here comes another one.
Yeah, she's having one now.
Is someone timing this? Uh, yeah, me.
I can't do this.
I can't do this! I know.
It hurts.
No, no, no.
I want to go home.
I'm not ready for this.
Yes, you are.
You're doing great, you're doing great.
I never wanted to do this alone.
I can't do this alone and you want me to sign things! You want you want me Forget all about that.
It doesn't matter.
No, I can't do this.
I can't.
I'm not ready.
Yes, you are.
You can do this.
Rob and I are going to be with you every step of the way.
Absolutely.
And we're not going anywhere after that baby's born.
Absolutely not.
OK? I can't do it.
I'm scared.
We're just going to take it day by day together.
OK? Yeah.
OK.
Oh, should we run a shower? Showers help, don't they? II don't know.
Is this still about Max? No.
This isn't about him.
Well um, what's it about? Going to need those towels! Harry.
What's going on? Baby.
Will you stop smiling? You completely disobeyed orders.
I can't help it.
I like winning as much as you do.
Dani.
Steve.
Baby.
Rob and Colette's.
Oh! Oh, my God! I'll direct the ambulance.
Hey.
Hi.
Hi.
I thought I'd come and take a quick look around, if that's OK.
Of course.
It's it's very hip.
Do you really believe that you can make a go of this? Honestly.
Yes.
I do and so does Tom.
But that doesn't mean it's going to be easy.
We both know that.
It's going to be an uphill battle.
When are you going to stop doing this? What am I doing? This not backing Tom.
I mean, you're encouraging him to just walk away when what he actually needs is to commit to something.
I know you think I stopped him in the past.
No.
No, no, no.
It's not 'think'.
You did.
And it doesn't matter how much you don't like me - he needs to move on.
Sasha, it's not about whether I like you or not.
I don't trust you, to be frank.
You really think I'm trying to screw him over? I think you need Tom more than he needs you.
And he can't see that, so you play on it.
So I'm using him? Sasha, you're asking Tom to tie up his cabinet-making business with this dream of yours I didn't ask him to do that.
That's the upshot.
And he will lose everything if this bar turns out to be a mistake.
But it's Tom's mistake to make, isn't it? I bet you Jade hates Rob right now.
Tom! Childbirth is a beautiful, natural Oh.
She says you have to keep pushing.
No.
It's not coming out.
I can't.
One more big push and then it's over.
You can do it! Trust me.
It's a boy.
It's a boy! Oh, my goodness! Thank you! He's beautiful.
Rob! Hey.
Can I hold him for a sec? Oh, ooh.
# I want to take you somewhere so you know I care # But it's so cold and I don't know where Sorry, but I've got to go with her.
# Daffodils on a pretty string It's OK.
Go.
# But they won't flower like they did last spring # And I want to kiss you and make you feel alright Hey.
Hey, mate, do you mind holding him for a sec? Uh uh yeah.
Just watch his head.
# And I wanna love but all my tears have been used up # On another love, another love Amazing day.
If you say so.
# On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # Oh, oh, oh Here.
Hey.
There we go.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, oh, oh.
Hi! # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up # On another love, another love # All my tears have been used up Oh, oh.
You know, don't you? I really don't want to talk about it.
So, um so, Carlos told you? No.
Harry did.
I was pretty shocked too.
Uh Don't blame Carlos for this.
Really? Don't bother.
Miranda, please.
I The only reason we kissed is because I was feeling upset about Max.
I was needing some comfort.
I really don't care about the details.
Yes, you do.
You do, Grace.
Him him kissing me must feel awful.
And I'm sorry that it happened.
But maybe the reason he kissed me is because he can't kiss you.
You you don't know what you're talking about.
Carlos is free to kiss whoever he likes, but we had rules and he broke them.
OK.
Anyway, I've heard you.
And what about Harry? How do you want me to Just You know what? Just leave Harry to me.
We got married so that he could get a visa and stay in the country.
Oh.
Oh! So Yeah.
.
.
it's a sham? Yeah.
I'm sorry.
Awesome.
OK Now that you know, you have to keep it a secret for me.
Oh! Up top.
What was that about? I don't know.
Doesn't matter.
Um There's something I have to tell you and, um .
.
you're not going to be happy.
I .
.
did something that I shouldn't have.
It was a mistake and I regret it.
We both do but it happened and, um I already know.
I was trying to do the right thing No! No, you weren't.
Harry saw you.
We agreed that public displays of affection were out.
Did we not agree on that? Yes.
Because if we didn't, then let me know.
We agreed.
I messed up.
Listen.
I don't live in some fantasy land.
II am under no illusion that this marriage is real.
But nobody else is supposed to know.
And we have a huge problem.
Harry won't tell.
It's not Harry.
Song has read Max's article and she's questioning me.
So thanks for that.
Because now I have to work out how to fix it.
Babies really put things in perspective, don't they? Yeah.
I mean, especially for Rob and Collette.
There's bigger, more important things in life than business and loans and Paintball.
Exactly.
Mmm.
Paintball.
Uh Sorry.
Mum wants to talk to me and Sasha.
Mmm.
Might need another beer.
- Hey.
- Hey.
How is Colette? Upset, mostly.
Wow.
At least someone's happy.
Extremely.
Good! Because that trophy is about all we're going to get out of that experience.
Look, I know there was a plan and I didn't exactly follow that plan but I just .
.
I didn't think you should start your business by throwing the game.
You're better than that.
A lot of good it's going to do me.
OK, so maybe I blew it today but, hey, there are plenty of other .
.
pie-makers in the sea.
You are lucky I love you.
I know.
Ah, Roxanne.
Hi.
Yeah.
Today was fun.
I was just going to call to Uh, OK.
Talk to you soon.
You got it? No.
But she wants to talk.
I told you! I am a genius.
What? So, I've talked to your dad and we've decided to go guarantor on the original business loan.
Seriously? I thought you said you couldn't.
Well, the short version is, for a number of reasons we're putting off selling our assets.
Oh! Mum, thanks, um, but I've already been given the thumbs up for an extension.
But this way you don't have to tie your business to it.
Oh, yeah, I'm OK with that.
It makes more sense to keep it separate.
It's less risky.
Yeah.
We really appreciate that but I think I think we're going to keep things the way they are.
Yeah, you and Warwick, you don't need to be a part of it.
Mmm.
We're doing this.
Yes.
Should I go and get some bubbles? Yes.
I should get some bubbles.
Thank you, though.
How's Jade doing? - Tired? - Tired.
And bossy.
Say hello, baby Shrek.
"Hello, Collette.
"Everyone here thinks I'm a monster, but in a good way.
" You were so great today.
I just I couldn't have done this without you.
You were amazing and you ARE amazing.
You were pretty good too.
I'm the luckiest man in the world to be married to you.
Oh, can you Can you take him for a sec? I need to Yeah.
Do you have to go? Yeah, but I'll, um I'll speak to you in the morning, OK? Bye.
OK.
Bye.
Hi.
Uh, I'm just here for Grace.
Hi.
I brought your dry-cleaning and some lunch.
Do you think that she's going to buy this as proof of anything? Yeah.
Yeah, man, keep it up.
Just lots of little domestic scenes to build our case.
It's not really my idea of newlyweds.
Is she still watching? Yeah, she's down there.
Good.
What was that? Proof.
And more romantic than dry-cleaning.
Um, you can go now.
I've I've got to get back to work.
OK.
Thank you.
Chocolate croissants.
Thanks for coming round.
I didn't expect you to bring breakfast.
Look, if this is still about the article, it's Grace's issue.
I don't get why you care so much.
It's not about the article.
Well Max, I can't be the other woman.
And I can't be with someone who has another woman.
I need to be with someone that's on the same page as me.
You're seeing another guy? No! I kissed someone and I felt so bad, but it made me realise So, um, we should stop seeing each other, then? I mean, that way you can kiss whoever you like with a clear conscience, right? Goodbye.