Dawson's Creek s03e09 Episode Script
Four to Tango
- Nothing? - Nothing.
You? Nothing.
God, Pacey, this is weird.
It's the damnedest thing.
How are we supposed to have some lurid, purely sexual affair if every time we get together-? - There's no sexual tension.
- Nada.
Zilch.
- If it's me- It's not you, it's me.
- Is it me? It's not you, it's me.
No, no, I mean, we're both- We're both two highly sexually-charged people.
- Absolutely.
Look at our track records.
- Yeah.
We're all that and then some, thank you.
Look at the measures we've gone through today.
We come properly equipped.
And we've picked the perfect locale.
Absolutely.
Dawson and Mr.
Leery both at school for the afternoon the window's always open.
This was sheer genius on your part.
Grams always said that that ladder was an invitation to sin.
- Just starting to get depressing.
- All right, I'll tell you what.
Why don't we give it a week? Keep trying in the hopes that whatever sexual spark once flickered will burn again.
Did you just hear somebody come into the house? Pacey.
Hey, man.
What's happening? What are you doing in my room in the middle of a school day? Just playing some " Crash Bandicoot.
" What are you doing home? I had a dentist appointment.
I came back to get my books.
You have any cavities? No.
How did you get in? Is that clock right there on the VCR? If it is, I should really be getting to school.
Aren't you forgetting something? - I don't think so.
- You sure? Pretty sure, yeah.
Because you're only wearing one shoe.
I hope that is not your report on manifest destiny.
Mine is only four paragraphs.
No.
Remember when Dawson put that story about me joining - the football team on the Web? - Yeah.
Well, these are e-mails from people who saw it.
Jack, this is amazing.
I mean, look how many people you reached.
Look, I didn't exactly reach everybody.
Check this out.
" Dear Homo: Too bad Capeside didn't make it to regionals.
We were looking forward to playing 'Smear the Queer.
"' Oh, my God.
That's so sad.
I mean, some poor, dumb cheerleader is wasting prime boy-chasing years on this closet case.
Okay, this one looks good.
" Dear Jack: Saw the story about you on the Web.
Have you been deluged with letters addressed, 'Dear Homo'? If not, I'm sure they'll come soon.
That's what happened to me when I took another guy to the prom last year and the story got picked up by the AP wire.
" Who's that from? Some guy named Ben.
Ben Street.
" If you need to talk to someone who's been there and lived to tell you can find me in the pink pages - under 'out teens.
"' - Give me that.
Got you.
You should write him.
He sounds nice.
Like I'm gonna write this guy.
I mean, he's a total stranger.
What would I say? I don't know.
Say anything.
Worked for John Cusack.
Okay, gotta go.
Bye.
All right.
Whatever it is, I didn't do it.
But if I did do it, I want you to know I take complete responsibility for my actions.
This isn't a disciplinary matter, Pacey.
Please.
You're here because when Mr.
Milo sent your file over to me you jumped immediately to the top 10 of my "most in need of guidance" list.
And when I started talking to your teachers You're failing math, Pacey.
- I'm failing? - I'm afraid the only other grades you've got going here are four D-pluses and one very lonely C-minus.
You want to tell me why that is? Just lazy, I guess.
Has there been trouble at home? Any change in your family situation? No, it's nothing like that.
Mr.
Milo mentioned a girlfriend being sick.
She's not my girlfriend anymore.
- Sorry to hear that.
- You and me both, but life goes on.
Listen, you think I could get out of here? I'm probably missing a filmstrip.
You seem like a good kid, Pacey.
Whatever's eating at you these days don't let it win, okay? Maybe it already has.
Okay, 40,000 hits? I must be doing something wrong.
You can't do a search on a broad topic like "democracy.
" I mean, you gotta decide what you want, what you don't want and then, you know, establish some restrictions.
Okay.
Oh, so it would be like if I were searching for, say, a boyfriend then I'd want to meet a lot of people and get to know them and eliminate the truly incompatible ones.
You know, you really should have your own website Okay.
I really think that you should write Ben back.
I mean, he seems super-nice, and he's only two towns over.
I mean, you guys could end up being friends or - Or what? - Or whatever.
- Please.
- What? You're worried that he has a boyfriend? Come on.
Let me assure you, a lot can happen between May and November.
- Prom guy could be out of the picture.
- Andie, stop it.
Jack, you have to seize the day.
If you don't, I'll do it for you.
I know your password.
Jack? What? Someone just instant-messaged you.
You just hit Oh, my God, it's Ben Street.
It's him.
What do I do? How do I make this go away? You don't make it go away.
He's talking to you.
Say something.
- Now? - Yeah.
He's waiting.
- Yeah, but I- - Type.
- I don't know what I'm- - Type.
- Go on.
- All right.
Okay, well, you have to hit "send.
" Hey, Joey.
Joey.
How are you doing? You are looking absolutely ravishing.
Is that a new hair thing you got going? You need notes from today's class that you missed.
- You missed me? - How could I miss you? It's so much easier to see the board without your big, fat head in the way.
I need these back by tomorrow morning.
What's a "cosine"? You don't know what a cosine is? You're never gonna catch up by midterms.
- You're right, I'm not.
Not unless you- - Look, I'm not going to help you.
I have been busting my butt all semester, while you've been Who knows what you've been doing? - I've been busy.
- Busy, right.
You have a very undemanding part-time job your only obligation is to feed the dog and your social life is a triangle consisting of you, me and Dawson.
Okay, listen.
Truth be told I'm failing math right now.
Yeah, so if you could find it in your heart to explain all this trig stuff to me I'd do anything you want.
Anything? Slow, quick, quick.
Good footwork, people.
Tell me what I'm doing here before the other nine - suffer the same fate.
- You expect me to believe that you actually have control over those lead feet of yours? - Pacey.
- I'm sorry.
Look, every year, the Starlight school offers a $1500 scholarship to the high-school student who best exemplifies the spirit of ballroom dancing.
About six people here wear their teeth to bed let alone go to high school with us.
Which would make you, what, a shoo-in? Well, I do have to complete at least one of the two-week courses.
Why didn't you get Dawson to do this? Or Jack, for that matter? Because they don't owe me like you will after I perform CPR on your math grade.
So that's the trade-off.
One study session for one dance class.
- That's the trade-off.
- Yeah, excellent.
What did I say about rib cages touching? And refresh my memory, who's leading here? I'm trying, but Janet Reno here doesn't exactly make it easy on a fella.
Like you even know how, Pacey.
- You lead.
- Well, let's give it the old college try shall we? Don't get too close.
This is your assignment for study hall.
Do all the even problems on page 107.
Show your work.
Don't just copy the answers out of the back.
If I'd known the pleasure you were gonna take out of this I never would've let you have such free reign.
We'll spend an hour doing math, then we're gonna go back to- I know.
The Starlight Foundation.
Another afternoon's torture at the hands of Miss Penny Pretty.
You do realize, don't you, how absolutely imperative it is that no one, and I mean no one, find out about our after-school activities? On the scale of embarrassing and decidedly non-butch activities for a teenage male to be involved in waltzing is up there with painting pottery.
Do you really think I'm eager to have this information - disseminated to the public? - Perfect.
Then we're in agreeance.
- Exactly.
No one.
- No one's to find out.
Perfect.
Find out what? Nothing.
No, no, we can tell him.
It's Dawson, right? We were- We were just discussing the fact that I am really awful at home improvement and decor.
Right? - How are you with a roller? - I can hold my own.
Fantastic.
The Pacey Witter Memorial addition to the Potter home is in desperate need of painters and plasterers, all union wages.
- Count me in.
- That's good to hear.
All right.
So, Joey? - Yeah.
- Okay, let's do it.
- Hold on.
I want to talk to you a sec.
- Yes.
I can't talk at all right now.
I'm trying to stay off Mr.
Milo's top-10 "most tardy" list.
Can I get you after school? Yeah? Okay.
Have you asked about prom guy yet? All right.
They were never really dating.
They did the whole prom thing - as a statement.
- Political commitment.
I like that.
In moderation, of course.
Well, what else? He's a saxophonist.
Huge Charlie Parker fan.
All-conference track.
Sounds hot.
What's he look like? Come on, that's not important.
Well, yeah, but he saw you on the Web in uniform.
It's only fair.
We're just writing.
It's not like we're going on a date.
- Yet.
- You know, I dated a guy from the Internet once.
Hideous.
I'm gonna- I'm gonna get that picture, yeah.
Two.
One formal, one casual.
No baseball hats, baggy sweaters or other articles of deceiving clothing.
Jen.
Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be out campaigning for prom queen? Very funny, Dawson.
No, actually, I'm working on a project with Pacey.
It's a human-growth- and-development thing.
Is he here? - He isn't in till Tuesday.
- But he told me he was working today.
I must have gotten him confused.
That's not surprising, considering what a flake he's been lately.
There aren't any especially doable new faculty members - I don't know about, are there? - What? Well, last time Pacey was acting this weird I ended up with taped outtakes of him and Miss Jacobs performing tree surgery at the ruins.
Wait, you don't think that Pacey's older-woman fetish has returned with a vengeance, do you? I don't know what to think.
But you're definitely thinking something.
Yeah, I Yesterday, I came back to my house in the middle of the day, and I found Pacey sprawled on my bedroom floor.
Wow.
Was he alone? Yeah, he was playing " Crash Bandicoot.
" Dawson, I hope that's not one of your clever euphemisms for- No, it's just a video game.
- Good.
- But here's the weird thing.
Later that night, I found a condom on my floor.
Then, when I asked Pacey about it he and Joey were huddled together like it was some sort of conspiracy.
Has he-? Has he said anything to you? I mean, have you talked at all with him yet? No, he took off, and he's been dodging me ever since.
Can we take a break, please? We just took a break.
No wonder you're so behind.
- Alexander can sit still longer than you.
- No, you don't understand.
It's just that, recently, whenever I crack a book to study it's like I automatically want to be doing something else.
Anything else.
I mean it seems to me that, under the previous regimes in my life every time I was studying, I was given a reward.
- I offered you Chex Mix.
- I'm not talking about Chex Mix.
I'm talking about Tamara, and I'm talking about Andie.
Let's just say that those two ladies, they trained me to equate studying - with - With what? Sex.
I equate studying with sex, sex with studying.
Now I get the studying, but no sex.
You understand? It's hard to get motivated these days.
So, what you're saying is that you're merely the innocent victim in some behavioural psychology experiment gone horribly awry? - Yeah.
- And that you're desperately in need of some able-bodied female to help you provoke those preconditioned - Pavlovian homework responses? - Yes.
That is the worst pickup line I have ever heard, Pacey.
Thanks, toots, but I wasn't hitting on you.
I'll have you know, I have my own prospects, thanks.
Like who? For right now, they would prefer to remain anonymous.
But they've made it clear, in no uncertain terms should the mutual desire occur they will be willing to take care of all my physical needs, you understand? So is this a potential relationship, or are we talking a free-trade agreement? All right, listen.
If you had the opportunity to be with somebody, no questions asked no strings attached no awkward first dates, no waiting by the phone, no any of that totally on the surface, what would you do? Would you go for it? A totally empty, emotionally unfulfilling sexual experience? - That sounds great.
- You're not listening.
I'm being serious.
But it's kind of a limited-time offer.
So I just thought I'd ask you.
What do you think? Pacey, I think that if you really wanted to be having casual sex with someone right now you'd be doing it instead of sitting here having a hypothetical discussion about it.
That's what I think.
Oh, come on, already.
Yeah.
Okay, all right.
All right, it's- It's happening.
Not bad.
You're not kidding.
Jack, did you actually express attraction to a member of the male species? What? Oh, come on, this is completely empirical.
I mean anyone would be attracted to that extremely attractive guy.
And I sense a blush.
"So, what do you think?" - He wants to know what I think.
- Okay, so you tell him that- That you think that he should travel two towns over.
- I can't do that.
- You can and will.
Andie, come on.
This is way, way too fast.
Okay, so you tell him you want to meet for coffee.
- I can go with you if you want.
- Yeah, that'll be a lot of fun.
Okay, Jack.
Agree to meet at some very safe, very well-lit public place.
It's not like we haven't done an extensive background check on the guy to know that he's for real.
Look, I can't, all right? - Look at me, I'm shaking.
- Fine, Jack.
You're just nervous.
Here.
"The picture was great.
What can I say? Want to meet tonight for coffee?" - " I thought you'd never ask.
" - " Never ask!" I don't know how you suckered me into helping you with your centennial Hitchcock window display.
It needed a woman's touch.
I suppose that's where Pacey usually comes in.
No, Pacey's usually in the back sleeping when I'm doing this.
All right.
Maybe he's rediscovered his work ethic.
What do you mean? Pacey, 2 o'clock.
Is that Joey? Dawson, do you have one of those little signs that says " back in five"? Yeah.
Okay, so Joey and Pacey are auditioning for Capeside Dinner Theatre's version of Strictly Ballroom.
- Let's get out of here.
- Right behind you.
Excellent! Two more young people eager to learn the sophisticated art of ballroom dancing.
And people say kids have no appreciation - for the finer things.
- We're not here to dance.
- We're looking for friends.
- While you look, you dance, okay? Attention, everybody.
Looks like we have yet another set of delightful young people joining our class.
Must be something in the air.
And what, pray tell, are you two doing here? Just enjoying the fine art of ballroom dancing.
Didn't I say you two would be naturals? Much better than these two, and they've been here all week but you used to date, didn't you? - Not right now, okay? - I'm right, aren't I? You dated, it didn't work out, but then you got past all of your issues and now you actually trust each other, right? See, you can see that in the dancing.
You can see that the trust is there.
Now, these two, on the other hand, whole different story.
I mean, look at them.
Look at their form.
- Look at the tension in their arms.
- Is there some sort of problem here? What did I say about rib cages touching? - Can we do that? - No, sorry.
- It just not gonna happen.
- Right.
You see what I mean? See the hostility, the way they're wary with each other not to mention the constant bickering and name-calling.
Now, these two clearly are in the early stages of some screwball mating ritual.
What? - You've got it all wrong, lady.
- Really, I do? - Oh, completely.
- Actually, you couldn't be more wrong.
There's enough sexual tension here to power a KISS reunion tour.
I can't remember the last time I saw dancing this bad.
- True.
- Wait.
Just because they can't dance - you think-? - It's this theory I've developed based on years of experience.
If people dance that badly, then they're usually hot for each other.
The dancing doesn't lie.
All right, people.
Let's take it from the top.
Hey.
Mrs.
Ryan let me in.
Is that what you're wearing? - Good night, Andie.
- I just like you better in blue.
I mean, you look fine.
You always look fine.
Yeah, all right.
I sense a pep talk coming on.
Okay, Jack, look.
I'm your sister, and I love you and your romantic future is vitally important to me.
If I wind up an old maid, I'm coming to live with you and your boyfriend.
So you're fairly certain I'll have a boyfriend? - Sure.
- It hasn't occurred to you this whole online thing could be a disaster? Okay, Jack, worst-case scenario: You show up, you meet each other, you hate each other you drink your mochaccinos, and you go your separate ways.
But that's not gonna happen.
I have a really good feeling.
- I'm glad someone does.
- Jack, there's no need to be nervous.
- Ben obviously likes you.
- I don't even know Ben.
- Ben doesn't know me.
- Thus the reason for having coffee.
Andie, this is different.
This is a whole new level of my life that I don't even know if I'm ready for.
When I walk through that door, and I say hello to this guy my entire life is gonna be different.
I'm not just gonna be telling the world that I'm gay.
I'm actually gonna be gay.
Jack you'll be gay anyway.
I mean, if you don't go, you'll be gay and without a boyfriend.
- Yeah.
- Okay? Okay, people, we're gonna play a little game.
I want you to consider this "musical partners" instead of "musical chairs," okay? I want you two you two, you two you two you two.
Thank you.
You two.
What? No.
I think you must've made some sort of mistake here.
Come on, children, play nice.
Okay, we are going to dance happily, joyously, enthusiastically, because we love to dance.
Now, when you hear the music stop and I yell "switch," I want you to stop dancing and reach for the nearest available partner.
All right? So when did you and Pacey discover your love of ballroom dancing? Obviously just moments before you and Dawson did.
I can't get over how weird it was to see you in my room the other day.
- What's going on? - What? Not everybody's got the dazzling array of electronics available that you do.
And that's the only reason you were in my house when I wasn't there? No.
There's always the lure of the Leery kitchen which has lost its lustre in Mitch's reign of terror.
So, what was the condom for? - The what? - The condom I found in my room.
- Switch! - Excuse me for a second.
- We're dead.
He found the condom.
- I know.
I've already talked to him about it.
I wouldn't worry.
Really? You don't think he'll mind us mapping our erogenous zones - between his sheets? - Moot question.
He's not onto us.
- He's not? - No.
Well, at least he's not onto me.
He's cast somebody else as the female lead.
So when did you discover your love for ballroom dancing? I read about some scholarship that they were having.
- Scholarship? - And I needed a partner, so So But why'd you ask Pacey? Why didn't you just ask me? Pacey came to me first.
He needed help with math, I needed help with this.
That's what friends do, Dawson, they help each other.
That's all you guys are, is friends? And switch.
Excuse us for a second.
I need to talk to you.
- What is wrong with him? - Nothing, really.
It's just Dawson seems to think that we're doing it.
What? Well, you know, having sex getting to know each other in the biblical sense.
Pacey, that's impossible.
And he would never think that.
No, not under normal circumstances.
But in this case, I think certain events were perhaps misconstrued.
- What events? - Switch.
Well, I just- Okay So - Do you wanna tell me what's going on? - It's not what you think.
Not even close.
- How do you know what I think? - Because it's written all over your face.
Yes, me and Joey have spent a lot of time together because we've been learning how to dance and she's teaching me trigonometry.
What's interesting to me is that of all the blond and brunette combinations of women we both know, the first one that popped into your mind is Joey- You're not getting out of this by psychoanalysing me.
I'm just asking a simple question.
Dawson, you and Joey- She's not your girlfriend anymore.
- You're right, she's not.
- Right.
So then, why are we having this conversation? You see where I'm going? You're the guy who said that you two needed to go your separate ways.
Yeah, we do.
It just never occurred to me that- That what? That she would actually go her separate way too? Or perhaps it didn't occur to you her separate way would include a stopover at me.
Is that what it is? God, this is the way it always is with you.
You talk, but you don't listen to yourself.
You say you're over her, but you're not.
The words don't mean anything.
Look, you don't know what you're talking about.
Look at that girl, Dawson.
Take a good look.
She's a freaking goddess.
How long did you think it'd be before some guy comes along and is interested in her? I mean, really, dude.
And when that happens, what are you gonna do? - I'll take it as it comes.
- You'll take it as it comes.
Perhaps you should start now, because the guy who comes along won't be your friend.
He won't ask permission.
The guy that comes along will take one look at her and cut right in on you.
What are you hiding, Pacey? - What? - All this analysis of my love life doesn't change that you didn't answer me.
Why did I find the condom? - Why do I bother? - Switch.
God, I don't believe that guy.
Pacey, chill out.
Here we are again, though I have to say, the storyline is starting to stretch the limits of believability.
Meaning what? Meaning we're two red-blooded American teenagers who, weeks ago made the enlightened decisions not to keep our bodies to ourselves.
And what do we have to show for it? Nothing.
Nothing.
How is that possible? I've spent a lot of time trying to figure this out, and I'm just drawing a blank.
Pacey, it's for about a million different reasons.
Really? Well, do you think you could hit me with a couple just to make me feel better? How about the fact that our mothers teach us to be embarrassed about sex? Or that we live in a country that thinks violence is cool but gets squeamish when two people under legal voting age start using the correct terms for each other's body parts? Pacey, is this a not-so-subtle way of telling me that you're ready for a return to Witch Island? Maybe it was the dancing or perhaps it's just the romantic setting of this coat room but I am definitely getting that Witch-y feeling.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to accuse you of anything but something strange is going on.
If Pacey's not sleeping with you he's definitely sleeping with somebody.
Well, what do we have here? It's nothing, right? Yeah, nothing.
- Doesn't look like nothing.
- Believe me, man.
We've done exhaustive research in this area.
It's nothing.
Pacey and I are just friends.
Is that what kids are calling it these days? You guys are stupid.
You'll both get hurt by this.
Nobody's gonna get hurt by this.
We both agreed that neither of us have our emotions in it.
- And you're proud of that fact? - Joey, we were just messing around.
Dawson? They lost me at " nothing.
" Pacey, this isn't you.
I mean, Jen, maybe you're trying to prove something to somebody about- Hey, slow down.
This was as much my decision as it was hers, okay? So is that why you named your boat True Love? Because you think it's okay for casual acquaintances, or even friends to just use each other as scratching posts? - I knew you weren't gonna understand.
- You know what? I understand.
I understand just fine.
I have never in my life seen somebody so worked up over just a kiss.
I don't think it was just the kiss.
What do you mean? I mean that Joey knows about our arrangement.
How could she possibly know, Pacey? Because I went to her for some hypothetical advice but when she saw us kissing, I'm pretty sure she figured out that it wasn't so hypothetical.
You went to Joey for advice about us? Yeah, I know.
Not so smart, huh? Smart or not smart, it's just funny you went to her.
Well, I wouldn't say that I went to her.
I mean she just happened to be there.
We were studying- Can I ask you something, Pacey? What is it about her? She's obviously got something that makes boys in emotional turmoil flock to her.
- Come again? - Come on.
Dawson's the same way.
Whatever small problem got to him, he went straight to Joey.
So who else would you have me talk to? I can't go to Andie with something like this.
So I guess I should commune with Deputy Doug.
Dawson.
Why couldn't you just go to Dawson? - What? - Unless, of course you now feel uncomfortable talking to him about your sex life, considering Considering what? That your current girl Friday used to be his.
Okay, now correct me if I'm wrong but Dawson Leery didn't know about you and I until, what, two minutes ago? I'm not talking about us.
What, Joey? This has nothing to do with Joey.
I saw the way you overreacted to Dawson.
I saw the way Joey overreacted to us.
I know that you're having trouble in math these days but it doesn't take Einstein to get the sum of these reactions.
You have to explain this one to me, because I'm missing something.
You're talking about Joey Potter, right? The one who can't walk into the same room with me without gagging? There was nothing going on between us- No, Pacey, there's nothing between us.
No matter what we do, it's not gonna work out between us.
- No, it's not, is it? - No.
Are you disappointed? Yeah, I'm disappointed.
And at the same time I think I'm also a little relieved.
Me too.
I'm gonna go.
See you, Pacey.
You know what, Pacey? Thanks for nothing.
What are you still doing here? Anxiously waiting to be regaled with first-date stories.
They tell me, in order to have first-date stories you actually have to have a first date.
- What happened? - I can't get into this with you.
You'll get on me about how I handled it.
Jack, that's not fair.
You're always the one scraping me off the concrete.
Can't I return the favour? I didn't even go in, okay? I panicked.
I got there I looked through the window, and I saw him sitting there, waiting for me.
Then I saw this couple this girl and this guy, and when I saw them, it- When I saw them, at that moment, I didn't wanna be me.
I wanted to be them.
I got so upset that I just left.
When it comes down to it, I'm just not brave enough to walk through the door.
Oh, Jack, you are so brave.
I mean, your entire life, you have been nothing but brave.
Yeah, but not this time.
I mean I keep taking baby steps, but I'm not getting anywhere.
- You know, I'm not getting any braver.
- Don't be so hard on yourself.
I mean, that's what fear is for.
It's- It's life's way of telling us that we're not ready for certain things.
Aren't you the same girl who spent the past week dragging me kicking and screaming towards my romantic destiny? Yeah, but I know when to push and when not to.
It's a little something I picked up from annoyingsister.
com.
Anyway, Jack when it's right, you'll know it.
And that's when you'll walk through that door when you're ready.
If it makes you feel any better, what happened was inevitable.
- What was? - What we just saw.
All right, look at it from a storytelling perspective.
Okay, Pacey's brooding, disillusioned, tough-guy persona was destined to collide with Jen's fake sexual bravado.
It's inevitable.
Dawson, you're the ultimate romantic.
How can you not be more upset about this? If Jen and Pacey wanna mess around in a coat room, that's their business.
But you don't understand what's going on.
They made some casual-sex pact.
They're just using each other.
Joey, we're all guilty of that.
At least they're being up-front about it.
So you buy into this whole raging-hormones theory? You think it's okay for two people not in love to just let their sexual impulses run wild? No, what I'm saying is, if they made some agreement I don't think they made it because they wanted sex.
I think they wanted comfort.
I'm sure that's all they were doing in your bed providing each other with comfort.
It's not impossible.
I mean, it's all you and I ever did.
Come on, give them a break, Jo.
They're just lonely.
Dawson, being lonely is no excuse to just throw yourself at the first available warm body.
Could you sleep with someone - that you didn't love? - No.
And neither could you.
But I do understand the impulse.
- What impulse? - Impulse to To put your hand out and want someone at the end of your reach.
You know, to want someone to be close to.
To want to kiss or touch, even if it's wrong.
That's just it, Dawson.
It's wrong.
If a kiss is just some purely physical thing and if there's nothing else behind it, what's the point? The point is, you can't control those feelings.
Even if they're wrong, they're there.
They're always there.
You can understand that, can't you? You know, I forgot my coat.
I better go inside and get it.
Okay.
Good night, Joey.
I forgot my coat.
Well, yeah, you ran out of there in a bit of a hurry, didn't you? Look, if it makes you feel any better we never actually slept together.
I mean, not even close.
It's none of my business what you guys did or didn't do.
I'm sorry I overreacted.
Yeah, you did overreact, didn't you? Don't act so smug.
I'm not saying you're right or that I approve of what you guys are doing.
Were doing.
I'd say the time limit on the limited-time offer has probably run out now.
So you got your coat.
What made you come in here? Dawson.
He convinced me to take pity on your poor, misguided, testosterone-impaired self.
- He did that, did he? - Afraid so.
Man, guess I owe him another one, huh? You do.
Come on.
Let's go.
Hey, not so fast, you two.
There's a class about to start.
I think we've done enough dancing for a lifetime.
Whoa, whoa, let's not be too hasty here.
We've still got a scholarship to work for.
Oh, about that scholarship things have been kind of tight here.
There's no scholarship? No.
But what I can offer you is six months of free dance lessons.
What would we do with those? The cha-cha, the rumba, the merengue.
When you're ready, the tango.
- It's the dance of love.
- Thanks, but no thanks.
Come on, think about this for a second.
Don't be too hasty.
We may have found our calling in this studio.
Give it up, Pacey.
You definitely were not that good.
You? Nothing.
God, Pacey, this is weird.
It's the damnedest thing.
How are we supposed to have some lurid, purely sexual affair if every time we get together-? - There's no sexual tension.
- Nada.
Zilch.
- If it's me- It's not you, it's me.
- Is it me? It's not you, it's me.
No, no, I mean, we're both- We're both two highly sexually-charged people.
- Absolutely.
Look at our track records.
- Yeah.
We're all that and then some, thank you.
Look at the measures we've gone through today.
We come properly equipped.
And we've picked the perfect locale.
Absolutely.
Dawson and Mr.
Leery both at school for the afternoon the window's always open.
This was sheer genius on your part.
Grams always said that that ladder was an invitation to sin.
- Just starting to get depressing.
- All right, I'll tell you what.
Why don't we give it a week? Keep trying in the hopes that whatever sexual spark once flickered will burn again.
Did you just hear somebody come into the house? Pacey.
Hey, man.
What's happening? What are you doing in my room in the middle of a school day? Just playing some " Crash Bandicoot.
" What are you doing home? I had a dentist appointment.
I came back to get my books.
You have any cavities? No.
How did you get in? Is that clock right there on the VCR? If it is, I should really be getting to school.
Aren't you forgetting something? - I don't think so.
- You sure? Pretty sure, yeah.
Because you're only wearing one shoe.
I hope that is not your report on manifest destiny.
Mine is only four paragraphs.
No.
Remember when Dawson put that story about me joining - the football team on the Web? - Yeah.
Well, these are e-mails from people who saw it.
Jack, this is amazing.
I mean, look how many people you reached.
Look, I didn't exactly reach everybody.
Check this out.
" Dear Homo: Too bad Capeside didn't make it to regionals.
We were looking forward to playing 'Smear the Queer.
"' Oh, my God.
That's so sad.
I mean, some poor, dumb cheerleader is wasting prime boy-chasing years on this closet case.
Okay, this one looks good.
" Dear Jack: Saw the story about you on the Web.
Have you been deluged with letters addressed, 'Dear Homo'? If not, I'm sure they'll come soon.
That's what happened to me when I took another guy to the prom last year and the story got picked up by the AP wire.
" Who's that from? Some guy named Ben.
Ben Street.
" If you need to talk to someone who's been there and lived to tell you can find me in the pink pages - under 'out teens.
"' - Give me that.
Got you.
You should write him.
He sounds nice.
Like I'm gonna write this guy.
I mean, he's a total stranger.
What would I say? I don't know.
Say anything.
Worked for John Cusack.
Okay, gotta go.
Bye.
All right.
Whatever it is, I didn't do it.
But if I did do it, I want you to know I take complete responsibility for my actions.
This isn't a disciplinary matter, Pacey.
Please.
You're here because when Mr.
Milo sent your file over to me you jumped immediately to the top 10 of my "most in need of guidance" list.
And when I started talking to your teachers You're failing math, Pacey.
- I'm failing? - I'm afraid the only other grades you've got going here are four D-pluses and one very lonely C-minus.
You want to tell me why that is? Just lazy, I guess.
Has there been trouble at home? Any change in your family situation? No, it's nothing like that.
Mr.
Milo mentioned a girlfriend being sick.
She's not my girlfriend anymore.
- Sorry to hear that.
- You and me both, but life goes on.
Listen, you think I could get out of here? I'm probably missing a filmstrip.
You seem like a good kid, Pacey.
Whatever's eating at you these days don't let it win, okay? Maybe it already has.
Okay, 40,000 hits? I must be doing something wrong.
You can't do a search on a broad topic like "democracy.
" I mean, you gotta decide what you want, what you don't want and then, you know, establish some restrictions.
Okay.
Oh, so it would be like if I were searching for, say, a boyfriend then I'd want to meet a lot of people and get to know them and eliminate the truly incompatible ones.
You know, you really should have your own website Okay.
I really think that you should write Ben back.
I mean, he seems super-nice, and he's only two towns over.
I mean, you guys could end up being friends or - Or what? - Or whatever.
- Please.
- What? You're worried that he has a boyfriend? Come on.
Let me assure you, a lot can happen between May and November.
- Prom guy could be out of the picture.
- Andie, stop it.
Jack, you have to seize the day.
If you don't, I'll do it for you.
I know your password.
Jack? What? Someone just instant-messaged you.
You just hit Oh, my God, it's Ben Street.
It's him.
What do I do? How do I make this go away? You don't make it go away.
He's talking to you.
Say something.
- Now? - Yeah.
He's waiting.
- Yeah, but I- - Type.
- I don't know what I'm- - Type.
- Go on.
- All right.
Okay, well, you have to hit "send.
" Hey, Joey.
Joey.
How are you doing? You are looking absolutely ravishing.
Is that a new hair thing you got going? You need notes from today's class that you missed.
- You missed me? - How could I miss you? It's so much easier to see the board without your big, fat head in the way.
I need these back by tomorrow morning.
What's a "cosine"? You don't know what a cosine is? You're never gonna catch up by midterms.
- You're right, I'm not.
Not unless you- - Look, I'm not going to help you.
I have been busting my butt all semester, while you've been Who knows what you've been doing? - I've been busy.
- Busy, right.
You have a very undemanding part-time job your only obligation is to feed the dog and your social life is a triangle consisting of you, me and Dawson.
Okay, listen.
Truth be told I'm failing math right now.
Yeah, so if you could find it in your heart to explain all this trig stuff to me I'd do anything you want.
Anything? Slow, quick, quick.
Good footwork, people.
Tell me what I'm doing here before the other nine - suffer the same fate.
- You expect me to believe that you actually have control over those lead feet of yours? - Pacey.
- I'm sorry.
Look, every year, the Starlight school offers a $1500 scholarship to the high-school student who best exemplifies the spirit of ballroom dancing.
About six people here wear their teeth to bed let alone go to high school with us.
Which would make you, what, a shoo-in? Well, I do have to complete at least one of the two-week courses.
Why didn't you get Dawson to do this? Or Jack, for that matter? Because they don't owe me like you will after I perform CPR on your math grade.
So that's the trade-off.
One study session for one dance class.
- That's the trade-off.
- Yeah, excellent.
What did I say about rib cages touching? And refresh my memory, who's leading here? I'm trying, but Janet Reno here doesn't exactly make it easy on a fella.
Like you even know how, Pacey.
- You lead.
- Well, let's give it the old college try shall we? Don't get too close.
This is your assignment for study hall.
Do all the even problems on page 107.
Show your work.
Don't just copy the answers out of the back.
If I'd known the pleasure you were gonna take out of this I never would've let you have such free reign.
We'll spend an hour doing math, then we're gonna go back to- I know.
The Starlight Foundation.
Another afternoon's torture at the hands of Miss Penny Pretty.
You do realize, don't you, how absolutely imperative it is that no one, and I mean no one, find out about our after-school activities? On the scale of embarrassing and decidedly non-butch activities for a teenage male to be involved in waltzing is up there with painting pottery.
Do you really think I'm eager to have this information - disseminated to the public? - Perfect.
Then we're in agreeance.
- Exactly.
No one.
- No one's to find out.
Perfect.
Find out what? Nothing.
No, no, we can tell him.
It's Dawson, right? We were- We were just discussing the fact that I am really awful at home improvement and decor.
Right? - How are you with a roller? - I can hold my own.
Fantastic.
The Pacey Witter Memorial addition to the Potter home is in desperate need of painters and plasterers, all union wages.
- Count me in.
- That's good to hear.
All right.
So, Joey? - Yeah.
- Okay, let's do it.
- Hold on.
I want to talk to you a sec.
- Yes.
I can't talk at all right now.
I'm trying to stay off Mr.
Milo's top-10 "most tardy" list.
Can I get you after school? Yeah? Okay.
Have you asked about prom guy yet? All right.
They were never really dating.
They did the whole prom thing - as a statement.
- Political commitment.
I like that.
In moderation, of course.
Well, what else? He's a saxophonist.
Huge Charlie Parker fan.
All-conference track.
Sounds hot.
What's he look like? Come on, that's not important.
Well, yeah, but he saw you on the Web in uniform.
It's only fair.
We're just writing.
It's not like we're going on a date.
- Yet.
- You know, I dated a guy from the Internet once.
Hideous.
I'm gonna- I'm gonna get that picture, yeah.
Two.
One formal, one casual.
No baseball hats, baggy sweaters or other articles of deceiving clothing.
Jen.
Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be out campaigning for prom queen? Very funny, Dawson.
No, actually, I'm working on a project with Pacey.
It's a human-growth- and-development thing.
Is he here? - He isn't in till Tuesday.
- But he told me he was working today.
I must have gotten him confused.
That's not surprising, considering what a flake he's been lately.
There aren't any especially doable new faculty members - I don't know about, are there? - What? Well, last time Pacey was acting this weird I ended up with taped outtakes of him and Miss Jacobs performing tree surgery at the ruins.
Wait, you don't think that Pacey's older-woman fetish has returned with a vengeance, do you? I don't know what to think.
But you're definitely thinking something.
Yeah, I Yesterday, I came back to my house in the middle of the day, and I found Pacey sprawled on my bedroom floor.
Wow.
Was he alone? Yeah, he was playing " Crash Bandicoot.
" Dawson, I hope that's not one of your clever euphemisms for- No, it's just a video game.
- Good.
- But here's the weird thing.
Later that night, I found a condom on my floor.
Then, when I asked Pacey about it he and Joey were huddled together like it was some sort of conspiracy.
Has he-? Has he said anything to you? I mean, have you talked at all with him yet? No, he took off, and he's been dodging me ever since.
Can we take a break, please? We just took a break.
No wonder you're so behind.
- Alexander can sit still longer than you.
- No, you don't understand.
It's just that, recently, whenever I crack a book to study it's like I automatically want to be doing something else.
Anything else.
I mean it seems to me that, under the previous regimes in my life every time I was studying, I was given a reward.
- I offered you Chex Mix.
- I'm not talking about Chex Mix.
I'm talking about Tamara, and I'm talking about Andie.
Let's just say that those two ladies, they trained me to equate studying - with - With what? Sex.
I equate studying with sex, sex with studying.
Now I get the studying, but no sex.
You understand? It's hard to get motivated these days.
So, what you're saying is that you're merely the innocent victim in some behavioural psychology experiment gone horribly awry? - Yeah.
- And that you're desperately in need of some able-bodied female to help you provoke those preconditioned - Pavlovian homework responses? - Yes.
That is the worst pickup line I have ever heard, Pacey.
Thanks, toots, but I wasn't hitting on you.
I'll have you know, I have my own prospects, thanks.
Like who? For right now, they would prefer to remain anonymous.
But they've made it clear, in no uncertain terms should the mutual desire occur they will be willing to take care of all my physical needs, you understand? So is this a potential relationship, or are we talking a free-trade agreement? All right, listen.
If you had the opportunity to be with somebody, no questions asked no strings attached no awkward first dates, no waiting by the phone, no any of that totally on the surface, what would you do? Would you go for it? A totally empty, emotionally unfulfilling sexual experience? - That sounds great.
- You're not listening.
I'm being serious.
But it's kind of a limited-time offer.
So I just thought I'd ask you.
What do you think? Pacey, I think that if you really wanted to be having casual sex with someone right now you'd be doing it instead of sitting here having a hypothetical discussion about it.
That's what I think.
Oh, come on, already.
Yeah.
Okay, all right.
All right, it's- It's happening.
Not bad.
You're not kidding.
Jack, did you actually express attraction to a member of the male species? What? Oh, come on, this is completely empirical.
I mean anyone would be attracted to that extremely attractive guy.
And I sense a blush.
"So, what do you think?" - He wants to know what I think.
- Okay, so you tell him that- That you think that he should travel two towns over.
- I can't do that.
- You can and will.
Andie, come on.
This is way, way too fast.
Okay, so you tell him you want to meet for coffee.
- I can go with you if you want.
- Yeah, that'll be a lot of fun.
Okay, Jack.
Agree to meet at some very safe, very well-lit public place.
It's not like we haven't done an extensive background check on the guy to know that he's for real.
Look, I can't, all right? - Look at me, I'm shaking.
- Fine, Jack.
You're just nervous.
Here.
"The picture was great.
What can I say? Want to meet tonight for coffee?" - " I thought you'd never ask.
" - " Never ask!" I don't know how you suckered me into helping you with your centennial Hitchcock window display.
It needed a woman's touch.
I suppose that's where Pacey usually comes in.
No, Pacey's usually in the back sleeping when I'm doing this.
All right.
Maybe he's rediscovered his work ethic.
What do you mean? Pacey, 2 o'clock.
Is that Joey? Dawson, do you have one of those little signs that says " back in five"? Yeah.
Okay, so Joey and Pacey are auditioning for Capeside Dinner Theatre's version of Strictly Ballroom.
- Let's get out of here.
- Right behind you.
Excellent! Two more young people eager to learn the sophisticated art of ballroom dancing.
And people say kids have no appreciation - for the finer things.
- We're not here to dance.
- We're looking for friends.
- While you look, you dance, okay? Attention, everybody.
Looks like we have yet another set of delightful young people joining our class.
Must be something in the air.
And what, pray tell, are you two doing here? Just enjoying the fine art of ballroom dancing.
Didn't I say you two would be naturals? Much better than these two, and they've been here all week but you used to date, didn't you? - Not right now, okay? - I'm right, aren't I? You dated, it didn't work out, but then you got past all of your issues and now you actually trust each other, right? See, you can see that in the dancing.
You can see that the trust is there.
Now, these two, on the other hand, whole different story.
I mean, look at them.
Look at their form.
- Look at the tension in their arms.
- Is there some sort of problem here? What did I say about rib cages touching? - Can we do that? - No, sorry.
- It just not gonna happen.
- Right.
You see what I mean? See the hostility, the way they're wary with each other not to mention the constant bickering and name-calling.
Now, these two clearly are in the early stages of some screwball mating ritual.
What? - You've got it all wrong, lady.
- Really, I do? - Oh, completely.
- Actually, you couldn't be more wrong.
There's enough sexual tension here to power a KISS reunion tour.
I can't remember the last time I saw dancing this bad.
- True.
- Wait.
Just because they can't dance - you think-? - It's this theory I've developed based on years of experience.
If people dance that badly, then they're usually hot for each other.
The dancing doesn't lie.
All right, people.
Let's take it from the top.
Hey.
Mrs.
Ryan let me in.
Is that what you're wearing? - Good night, Andie.
- I just like you better in blue.
I mean, you look fine.
You always look fine.
Yeah, all right.
I sense a pep talk coming on.
Okay, Jack, look.
I'm your sister, and I love you and your romantic future is vitally important to me.
If I wind up an old maid, I'm coming to live with you and your boyfriend.
So you're fairly certain I'll have a boyfriend? - Sure.
- It hasn't occurred to you this whole online thing could be a disaster? Okay, Jack, worst-case scenario: You show up, you meet each other, you hate each other you drink your mochaccinos, and you go your separate ways.
But that's not gonna happen.
I have a really good feeling.
- I'm glad someone does.
- Jack, there's no need to be nervous.
- Ben obviously likes you.
- I don't even know Ben.
- Ben doesn't know me.
- Thus the reason for having coffee.
Andie, this is different.
This is a whole new level of my life that I don't even know if I'm ready for.
When I walk through that door, and I say hello to this guy my entire life is gonna be different.
I'm not just gonna be telling the world that I'm gay.
I'm actually gonna be gay.
Jack you'll be gay anyway.
I mean, if you don't go, you'll be gay and without a boyfriend.
- Yeah.
- Okay? Okay, people, we're gonna play a little game.
I want you to consider this "musical partners" instead of "musical chairs," okay? I want you two you two, you two you two you two.
Thank you.
You two.
What? No.
I think you must've made some sort of mistake here.
Come on, children, play nice.
Okay, we are going to dance happily, joyously, enthusiastically, because we love to dance.
Now, when you hear the music stop and I yell "switch," I want you to stop dancing and reach for the nearest available partner.
All right? So when did you and Pacey discover your love of ballroom dancing? Obviously just moments before you and Dawson did.
I can't get over how weird it was to see you in my room the other day.
- What's going on? - What? Not everybody's got the dazzling array of electronics available that you do.
And that's the only reason you were in my house when I wasn't there? No.
There's always the lure of the Leery kitchen which has lost its lustre in Mitch's reign of terror.
So, what was the condom for? - The what? - The condom I found in my room.
- Switch! - Excuse me for a second.
- We're dead.
He found the condom.
- I know.
I've already talked to him about it.
I wouldn't worry.
Really? You don't think he'll mind us mapping our erogenous zones - between his sheets? - Moot question.
He's not onto us.
- He's not? - No.
Well, at least he's not onto me.
He's cast somebody else as the female lead.
So when did you discover your love for ballroom dancing? I read about some scholarship that they were having.
- Scholarship? - And I needed a partner, so So But why'd you ask Pacey? Why didn't you just ask me? Pacey came to me first.
He needed help with math, I needed help with this.
That's what friends do, Dawson, they help each other.
That's all you guys are, is friends? And switch.
Excuse us for a second.
I need to talk to you.
- What is wrong with him? - Nothing, really.
It's just Dawson seems to think that we're doing it.
What? Well, you know, having sex getting to know each other in the biblical sense.
Pacey, that's impossible.
And he would never think that.
No, not under normal circumstances.
But in this case, I think certain events were perhaps misconstrued.
- What events? - Switch.
Well, I just- Okay So - Do you wanna tell me what's going on? - It's not what you think.
Not even close.
- How do you know what I think? - Because it's written all over your face.
Yes, me and Joey have spent a lot of time together because we've been learning how to dance and she's teaching me trigonometry.
What's interesting to me is that of all the blond and brunette combinations of women we both know, the first one that popped into your mind is Joey- You're not getting out of this by psychoanalysing me.
I'm just asking a simple question.
Dawson, you and Joey- She's not your girlfriend anymore.
- You're right, she's not.
- Right.
So then, why are we having this conversation? You see where I'm going? You're the guy who said that you two needed to go your separate ways.
Yeah, we do.
It just never occurred to me that- That what? That she would actually go her separate way too? Or perhaps it didn't occur to you her separate way would include a stopover at me.
Is that what it is? God, this is the way it always is with you.
You talk, but you don't listen to yourself.
You say you're over her, but you're not.
The words don't mean anything.
Look, you don't know what you're talking about.
Look at that girl, Dawson.
Take a good look.
She's a freaking goddess.
How long did you think it'd be before some guy comes along and is interested in her? I mean, really, dude.
And when that happens, what are you gonna do? - I'll take it as it comes.
- You'll take it as it comes.
Perhaps you should start now, because the guy who comes along won't be your friend.
He won't ask permission.
The guy that comes along will take one look at her and cut right in on you.
What are you hiding, Pacey? - What? - All this analysis of my love life doesn't change that you didn't answer me.
Why did I find the condom? - Why do I bother? - Switch.
God, I don't believe that guy.
Pacey, chill out.
Here we are again, though I have to say, the storyline is starting to stretch the limits of believability.
Meaning what? Meaning we're two red-blooded American teenagers who, weeks ago made the enlightened decisions not to keep our bodies to ourselves.
And what do we have to show for it? Nothing.
Nothing.
How is that possible? I've spent a lot of time trying to figure this out, and I'm just drawing a blank.
Pacey, it's for about a million different reasons.
Really? Well, do you think you could hit me with a couple just to make me feel better? How about the fact that our mothers teach us to be embarrassed about sex? Or that we live in a country that thinks violence is cool but gets squeamish when two people under legal voting age start using the correct terms for each other's body parts? Pacey, is this a not-so-subtle way of telling me that you're ready for a return to Witch Island? Maybe it was the dancing or perhaps it's just the romantic setting of this coat room but I am definitely getting that Witch-y feeling.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to accuse you of anything but something strange is going on.
If Pacey's not sleeping with you he's definitely sleeping with somebody.
Well, what do we have here? It's nothing, right? Yeah, nothing.
- Doesn't look like nothing.
- Believe me, man.
We've done exhaustive research in this area.
It's nothing.
Pacey and I are just friends.
Is that what kids are calling it these days? You guys are stupid.
You'll both get hurt by this.
Nobody's gonna get hurt by this.
We both agreed that neither of us have our emotions in it.
- And you're proud of that fact? - Joey, we were just messing around.
Dawson? They lost me at " nothing.
" Pacey, this isn't you.
I mean, Jen, maybe you're trying to prove something to somebody about- Hey, slow down.
This was as much my decision as it was hers, okay? So is that why you named your boat True Love? Because you think it's okay for casual acquaintances, or even friends to just use each other as scratching posts? - I knew you weren't gonna understand.
- You know what? I understand.
I understand just fine.
I have never in my life seen somebody so worked up over just a kiss.
I don't think it was just the kiss.
What do you mean? I mean that Joey knows about our arrangement.
How could she possibly know, Pacey? Because I went to her for some hypothetical advice but when she saw us kissing, I'm pretty sure she figured out that it wasn't so hypothetical.
You went to Joey for advice about us? Yeah, I know.
Not so smart, huh? Smart or not smart, it's just funny you went to her.
Well, I wouldn't say that I went to her.
I mean she just happened to be there.
We were studying- Can I ask you something, Pacey? What is it about her? She's obviously got something that makes boys in emotional turmoil flock to her.
- Come again? - Come on.
Dawson's the same way.
Whatever small problem got to him, he went straight to Joey.
So who else would you have me talk to? I can't go to Andie with something like this.
So I guess I should commune with Deputy Doug.
Dawson.
Why couldn't you just go to Dawson? - What? - Unless, of course you now feel uncomfortable talking to him about your sex life, considering Considering what? That your current girl Friday used to be his.
Okay, now correct me if I'm wrong but Dawson Leery didn't know about you and I until, what, two minutes ago? I'm not talking about us.
What, Joey? This has nothing to do with Joey.
I saw the way you overreacted to Dawson.
I saw the way Joey overreacted to us.
I know that you're having trouble in math these days but it doesn't take Einstein to get the sum of these reactions.
You have to explain this one to me, because I'm missing something.
You're talking about Joey Potter, right? The one who can't walk into the same room with me without gagging? There was nothing going on between us- No, Pacey, there's nothing between us.
No matter what we do, it's not gonna work out between us.
- No, it's not, is it? - No.
Are you disappointed? Yeah, I'm disappointed.
And at the same time I think I'm also a little relieved.
Me too.
I'm gonna go.
See you, Pacey.
You know what, Pacey? Thanks for nothing.
What are you still doing here? Anxiously waiting to be regaled with first-date stories.
They tell me, in order to have first-date stories you actually have to have a first date.
- What happened? - I can't get into this with you.
You'll get on me about how I handled it.
Jack, that's not fair.
You're always the one scraping me off the concrete.
Can't I return the favour? I didn't even go in, okay? I panicked.
I got there I looked through the window, and I saw him sitting there, waiting for me.
Then I saw this couple this girl and this guy, and when I saw them, it- When I saw them, at that moment, I didn't wanna be me.
I wanted to be them.
I got so upset that I just left.
When it comes down to it, I'm just not brave enough to walk through the door.
Oh, Jack, you are so brave.
I mean, your entire life, you have been nothing but brave.
Yeah, but not this time.
I mean I keep taking baby steps, but I'm not getting anywhere.
- You know, I'm not getting any braver.
- Don't be so hard on yourself.
I mean, that's what fear is for.
It's- It's life's way of telling us that we're not ready for certain things.
Aren't you the same girl who spent the past week dragging me kicking and screaming towards my romantic destiny? Yeah, but I know when to push and when not to.
It's a little something I picked up from annoyingsister.
com.
Anyway, Jack when it's right, you'll know it.
And that's when you'll walk through that door when you're ready.
If it makes you feel any better, what happened was inevitable.
- What was? - What we just saw.
All right, look at it from a storytelling perspective.
Okay, Pacey's brooding, disillusioned, tough-guy persona was destined to collide with Jen's fake sexual bravado.
It's inevitable.
Dawson, you're the ultimate romantic.
How can you not be more upset about this? If Jen and Pacey wanna mess around in a coat room, that's their business.
But you don't understand what's going on.
They made some casual-sex pact.
They're just using each other.
Joey, we're all guilty of that.
At least they're being up-front about it.
So you buy into this whole raging-hormones theory? You think it's okay for two people not in love to just let their sexual impulses run wild? No, what I'm saying is, if they made some agreement I don't think they made it because they wanted sex.
I think they wanted comfort.
I'm sure that's all they were doing in your bed providing each other with comfort.
It's not impossible.
I mean, it's all you and I ever did.
Come on, give them a break, Jo.
They're just lonely.
Dawson, being lonely is no excuse to just throw yourself at the first available warm body.
Could you sleep with someone - that you didn't love? - No.
And neither could you.
But I do understand the impulse.
- What impulse? - Impulse to To put your hand out and want someone at the end of your reach.
You know, to want someone to be close to.
To want to kiss or touch, even if it's wrong.
That's just it, Dawson.
It's wrong.
If a kiss is just some purely physical thing and if there's nothing else behind it, what's the point? The point is, you can't control those feelings.
Even if they're wrong, they're there.
They're always there.
You can understand that, can't you? You know, I forgot my coat.
I better go inside and get it.
Okay.
Good night, Joey.
I forgot my coat.
Well, yeah, you ran out of there in a bit of a hurry, didn't you? Look, if it makes you feel any better we never actually slept together.
I mean, not even close.
It's none of my business what you guys did or didn't do.
I'm sorry I overreacted.
Yeah, you did overreact, didn't you? Don't act so smug.
I'm not saying you're right or that I approve of what you guys are doing.
Were doing.
I'd say the time limit on the limited-time offer has probably run out now.
So you got your coat.
What made you come in here? Dawson.
He convinced me to take pity on your poor, misguided, testosterone-impaired self.
- He did that, did he? - Afraid so.
Man, guess I owe him another one, huh? You do.
Come on.
Let's go.
Hey, not so fast, you two.
There's a class about to start.
I think we've done enough dancing for a lifetime.
Whoa, whoa, let's not be too hasty here.
We've still got a scholarship to work for.
Oh, about that scholarship things have been kind of tight here.
There's no scholarship? No.
But what I can offer you is six months of free dance lessons.
What would we do with those? The cha-cha, the rumba, the merengue.
When you're ready, the tango.
- It's the dance of love.
- Thanks, but no thanks.
Come on, think about this for a second.
Don't be too hasty.
We may have found our calling in this studio.
Give it up, Pacey.
You definitely were not that good.