Atlanta (2016) s03e10 Episode Script
Tarrare
1
- [QUIET CHATTER.]
- [BICYCLE BELL DINGS.]
Can you elaborate on what you were saying? Oh, my God.
I don't want her to elaborate.
Listen, I have no problem elaborating.
Please, 'cause I'm gonna need some details.
- Oh, my God.
- Okay, so It's not like it's rocket science or nothing.
I just, you know, I pee on him.
He likes to be peed on.
- Ew.
- And he pays you? Girl, yes.
- He paid for your ticket out here? - Yes.
- And how much he pay you? - Oh, my God, y'all.
- Please.
- 6,000.
- Damn.
Really? - 6,000.
Girl, these French niggas is wild out here.
- Listen.
Yes.
- Just for some pee-pee? It ain't like he collecting it.
Okay.
Men have needs, okay? And I don't kink shame, because we are where, ladies? We are where? - SHANICE: En français? - CANDICE: En français.
Paris.
[LAUGHTER.]
Clink, clink.
Thank you, Candice, girl.
For including me and my cousin and bringing us on your, uh, "business trip.
" - It's business.
- [CHUCKLES.]
I feel like we needed this little girls' trip.
- True.
- I missed y'all crazy-asses, so - Aw.
- I missed you, too.
- Salud.
- Salud.
What's that mean? It's like "cheers.
" A European cheers.
European cheers.
Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, so, what's popping? Like, what are we about to get into? - This is my first time out here.
- Okay.
So, there is this Black historical walk that I read about.
And you follow, like, Langston Hughes, - Josephine Baker - Girl, no.
Um - Okay.
- Candice, can we do, like, something fun? Can we get into something crazy, please? - Please.
- Trust me well, I want to.
But it's a little tough, 'cause you kind of have to know a local to, like, really get into the crazy stuff.
- Really? - Then why don't you call your pee-pee boy? - [CHUCKLES.]
- Right.
No.
[CHUCKLES.]
SHANICE: What? - Oh, my God.
- SHANICE: What's going on? What? Girl, where are you going? SHANICE: The hell? [CONVERSING IN FRENCH.]
CANDICE: Van? [CONVERSATION IN FRENCH CONTINUES.]
CANDICE: Van? Hey.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Van, it's me.
It's Candice.
- Non Non.
- CANDICE: No? Désolée [IN FRENCH ACCENT.]
: Candice! I'm so sorry, chérie.
It is so good to see to see you.
[SIGHS.]
Et voilà.
Bon, you know, I never got your names.
- Shanice.
- I'm Xosha.
VAN: Oh, c'est très joli.
I love it.
So wonderful to meet you both.
I will get us something to celebrate.
S'il vous plaît, make yourself comfortable.
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING.]
SHANICE: Who is she? She your friend? Yeah, back in Atlanta.
SHANICE: You mean she ain't French? [SCOFFS.]
Girl, no.
- This girl crazy.
[LAUGHS.]
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh.
This is cute.
[PHONE CHIMING.]
[PHONE CONTINUES CHIMING.]
Et voilà.
I have a Domaine Chariot.
Hey, uh, who is this? That is Marcel, my partner, of course.
What How long have you been out here? Well, we met when I was working at his restaurant.
I was running the food.
Of course, he was the chef.
And, uh [CHUCKLES.]
I was such an idiot when I first came here.
So lost and alone, but then we met, and we were like magnets, you know.
Passion magnets, which I know you understand.
[VAN LAUGHS.]
Well, um, do you need any help in the kitchen? We can catch up.
What are you doing in Paris, actually? She came out here to pee on some nigga.
Oh, là là.
Uh, came out here to do more than that.
[VAN LAUGHS.]
But maybe we can catch up in private really quick.
You know, this reminds me I think I am running late.
Ah, bon.
I am running late.
[CHUCKLES.]
I have some errands to run, but, um Well, you are all welcome, of course.
I have, uh, friends.
They are How do you say? Uh, very cool.
Yes.
They will show you a good time.
So, yes, let us go.
Seize the day.
CANDICE: Ooh.
[QUIET CHATTER IN FRENCH.]
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER, LAUGHTER.]
SHANICE: She really got to take this bread - everywhere we go, huh? - [VAN SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Maybe it's security bread, like she don't feel French without it.
Just need to pick up some keys from my friend.
It should take five minutes.
Girl, this place is nice.
- Right? - It's fancy.
- Aw, baby ♪ - [KNOCKING.]
Yeah, Murder, Inc.
♪ I wanna love you, babe ♪ - ALEXANDER: Oh, hey, stranger.
- VAN: Hello, how are you? BOTH: Mm - Good to see you.
- Brought some friends.
Come on in.
- Hey, guys.
Hi.
- Hi.
Oh, my God.
Welcome to my suite, my sweets.
- Aw, baby ♪ - All right, sit Oh, sorry about all the mess in - I just wanna love you ♪ - Oh, this is embarrassing.
Here we go, mademoiselle.
- Mademoiselle.
- Nice.
I'm Alex, by the way.
- Yes.
[CHUCKLES.]
- We know who you are.
Very nice to meet you.
Always thinking of you, baby ♪ - [MOUTHING.]
- ALEXANDER: Hey.
- I think I like how your body ♪ - [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
- Missed you.
- Missed you.
Aw, baby, when you're kissing me ♪ - Aw, baby, when you're loving me ♪ - [MOANS.]
How good is this song? I've been listening to it on repeat all day.
Ashanti! Mm.
Is she still with Nelly, by the way? I don't, I don't think so.
- Nonstop with me ♪ - I love this song.
- It's good, huh? - Yeah.
I just wanna love you, baby ♪ I had this crazy idea that Hey, how-how about we just, uh, get naked.
Take our clothes off.
Can you take control of me? ♪ I just wanna love you, baby ♪ [LAUGHS.]
I don't I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I get these, like, crazy ideas.
Like, so random and completely inappropriate.
I apologize.
It's We don't want to do that.
Right? - I'm down.
I like it.
- We can.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
[MUSIC CONTINUES IN DISTANCE.]
Stay at the door.
Make sure he doesn't come in.
CANDICE: Hey.
When the hell did you start fucking Alexander Skarsgård? What? When did you start fucking Alexander Skarsgård? I would appreciate it if you didn't ask me this kind of question.
He's very private about his sex life.
Okay.
I'm just saying What happened to your partner? Oh, don't be so judgmental.
You know the strongest relationships have blurred lines.
You should know this.
Don't be so American about this.
Van, what is that? - VAN: It's nothing.
- CANDICE: You can't do that.
- Van - Relax.
It's fine.
We do this every week.
No, Van, this is, like, crack.
You can't just He loves when I play games with him.
Ah! Here are the keys.
Okay.
Let's go.
Okay, ladies, um, time to go.
- Night and day ♪ - What? No.
You-you didn't even touch your Negroni.
VAN: Ladies, please! Hey, guy-guys, no.
Please stay.
Guys.
That was fun.
I loved you on True Blood.
We loved watching you dancing.
You're cold, Vanessa! Cold! [FEIGNED CRYING.]
: It's Alexander.
He's doing drugs again.
I think it's meth, but I can't be sure.
You have to call the police or securité or someone.
What are you doing? Go back to his room.
You know, he could die if you stay here! You have to run! Allez-y! Run, please! It's our last chance to save him! [CRYING.]
What the fuck was that? [LAUGHS.]
: Oh, darlings, don't worry.
It is just a little game, you know.
We do it, like, every week.
It is so totally fine.
It's like our little devil dance, you know.
[LAUGHS.]
: Xosha knows the devil dance.
Anyway, I have another stop to make, but if you want to come again, I am having a party tonight.
It should be, uh, très fun.
I mean, I'm down.
Shit, ain't like we got anything else to do.
- So yeah.
- Yes.
Let's go.
Come, just one more stop.
[SIGHS.]
Here we are.
It is nice, no? Vanessa, this feels like Candyman.
[CHUCKLES.]
It does, doesn't it? I-I think we'll just wait out here.
I wouldn't.
She really ain't put this bread down once.
- I fucks with it now.
- [SCOFFS.]
[MUFFLED FRENCH RAP PLAYING.]
Ew, that garbage smells like something died in it.
That is not how dead things smell.
O-Okay, look, Van.
Can we please talk? Because I'm being serious right now.
- You're really starting to scare me.
- [GROANS.]
What is so scary? You wanted to see Paris.
Voilà.
We're in Paris.
- WOMAN: Tarrare! - What was that? - Hey, what was that? - It's nothing.
Relax.
- Did she say "tarrare"? - I don't know.
- It sounded like a bird.
- Look, okay, whatever's going on, we can talk about it, okay? We can have some drinks, go back to the hotel room.
- Are you fucking kidding me? - What? Emilio.
He fucked me.
- He really fucked me.
- Hey, who's Emilio? Okay, who cares? Can we please just get out of here? - 'Cause I really don't feel safe.
- Is Emilio the plug? Is this drugs, Van? Are you selling drugs? Well, let me get some Molly, then.
- [GASPS.]
- WOMAN: Tarrare! Shit.
We have to go.
[VAN SPEAKS FRENCH.]
Merde.
Fucking Emilio.
[STAMMERS.]
Wait-wait, what What's happening? - Like - WOMAN: Tarrare! CANDICE: Who are these guys? Van, Van.
What do they want? There's nothing more I can do.
If this is the way this is the way.
Tarrare.
Okay, why do they keep calling you Tarrare? [SCOFFS.]
He was the man who ate a baby.
[SHOUTING IN FRENCH.]
[GRUNTING.]
VAN: Viens, viens! CANDICE: Come on.
[INDISTINCT P.
A.
ANNOUNCEMENT.]
Where are we going? She hasn't said anything this entire time.
I know, she seems mad.
Is she okay? No.
She's not.
Van! - [TIRES SCREECH.]
- [HORN HONKS.]
[MAN SHOUTING IN FRENCH.]
Oh, shit.
Come on.
SHANICE: [CHUCKLES.]
The fuck? [KNOCKING LOUDLY.]
- [GASPS.]
- Chéri, ça va? - Mwah, mwah.
Mon bébé.
- [LAUGHS.]
I'm so glad you texted me.
I was losing my mind in there, you know? - Bien sûr.
[LAUGHS.]
- Long day.
But you can visit any time.
- Ces sont tes amies? - Oui.
Candice, Xosha et Shanice.
- CARLOS: Salut.
- VAN: È belle.
You know, I have an engagement present for you and Emilio.
I have to give it to you both, because I missed your party.
No, you're always so thoughtful.
- We missed you, you know.
- I know.
It's so sad.
Alors, I haven't seen Emilio in [EXHALES.]
forever.
Do you know where he is? Bébé, what luck.
- Emilio is inside! [LAUGHS.]
- [GASPS.]
Non, ce n'est pas vrai! He has also come for a visit.
Could we say a quick hello? - Of course.
- Okay, come on.
On y va.
- [DOOR SHUTS.]
- My love.
Look who has come to visit.
Salut, Emilio.
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY.]
Look, okay.
Please, I am sorry.
It's a misunderstanding.
I-I have the package, but but the package is for someone else.
Did Delphine ring you? On, no, sh-sh-she was supposed to ring you.
- Is this true, Emilio? - What's going on? Oh, nothing, my lion.
Uh, I promise.
Carlos, can you get someone to bring us some wine and some cheese? Oh, and for her friends, whatever they want.
- No.
No.
- Wine? Yeah? I think we will be just fine with some, uh, pain? Bread? Okay, okay.
Okay, everyone.
Please, everyone, go.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Merci.
Merci.
Please.
Please, please.
Please, you know me.
Come on, Van, you know me.
If you leave a baguette sitting out for a week you're crazy.
Why would you? It would get stale.
[LOUD THUD.]
And hard.
But what if you leave it out for two weeks? Or three weeks? Or or six months? How hard and how stale would it become? - [GRUNTS.]
- Oh, my God! [PANTING, GRUNTING.]
[EMILIO SCREAMING.]
[VAN EXCLAIMS.]
- It was worth the wait.
- Oh, my God.
The bread was worth the wait.
- [GRUNTING.]
- Okay, okay, Van, Van, please.
- Where is the package? - Please.
Van, please.
- [SPEAKING FRENCH.]
- Oh, all right.
- I mean All right, all right.
- [VAN LAUGHS.]
Emilio.
Where is the package? [PANTING.]
: I I can get you another bundle tomorrow.
Oh, no.
Today, Emilio.
- Van, please! - [VAN GROANS.]
- [WHIMPERS.]
- Open your mouth.
Huh? Either way, you will have to open your mouth.
Whether it is to tell me about the package, or to sink your teeth into this.
All right, all right.
It's It's in the vase.
The vase.
Shanice, retrieve the package.
[WHIMPERS.]
[SIGHS.]
No, the other vase.
- Just grab it, please.
- Okay, bet.
VAN: Vas-y, vas-y.
Come on.
[VAN CLEARS THROAT.]
Emilio don't come to dinner tonight.
Carlos, I am so sorry.
Shall we, ladies? It's drugs, isn't it? [VAN LAUGHS.]
- [LIVELY CHATTER.]
- [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING.]
[CHATTER AND MUFFLED MUSIC CONTINUE.]
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
[CONVERSING IN FRENCH.]
We were beginning to worry.
Well, I had some surprise friends from out of town come.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
We have extra seats.
Please stay for dinner.
- Oh, no, no, no.
We won't be staying.
- What? Why not? Uh, give me a second.
Um, because we weren't invited, Xosha.
She just invited us.
Okay, and we had a really long day that we need to recover from.
Okay, well, we was just talking about This morning, you was complaining about, "There's nothing really fun to do," and Yeah.
You were saying how to find the cool stuff we have to know a local.
Boom, there go some locals.
Something is wrong, all right? I know this is all fun and games to y'all, but there is something seriously wrong with Van right now.
Girl, let her live her life.
Yeah, I mean, she ain't hurting nobody.
I mean, okay, she's hurting people, but they're seemingly people who deserve to be hurt.
She has blood on a baguette that she's carrying around.
You're only saying that because you don't know her.
Yeah, we don't, but I like whoever this is.
- SHANICE: I'm-a go grab a drink.
- Yeah.
Me, too.
Sorry, girl.
Hey, excuse me.
- Can I talk to you? - Oh.
[SLOW CLAP.]
Bravo.
You really fucked me back there.
Paparazzi got ahold of the story.
I might lose the Baby Shark movie now.
Don't you ever do that again.
[SPITS.]
Let's go meet Marcel.
[DEPARTING FOOTSTEPS.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Think you can just humiliate me like that? Huh? [BREATHING HEAVILY.]
[MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY ON RADIO.]
- Hey, Van.
- Ça va, chéri? - Et toi? - Oh, Marcel.
Mm.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
I missed you.
Ah, where the fuck were you, huh? Emilio, he really fucked us this time.
- I'm not doing it again.
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, before I forget, this is my friend, Candice.
We both met while we were stripping on that river cruise.
- [CHUCKLES.]
- Oh, of course.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
We need to talk.
Right now.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Uh, you want to talk? Yeah.
What the fuck is going on? Merci.
What, you don't approve of my lifestyle? No.
No.
You're done You're done making me feel like I'm crazy.
Okay, 'cause today was nowhere near normal, Van.
Oh, mon Dieu.
Does Earn know you're here? Does anyone know that you're here? Does your parents know that you're here, Van? Because don't think I didn't clock your phone blowing up.
What? A very busy woman cannot receive many phone calls? God, can you just please talk normal? - I am talking normal.
- Without the fake accent, Van.
[STAMMERS.]
What are you doing? Really, like, what-what are you doing here? What are you doing here? Peeing on some guy? No, it's-it's very interesting.
You know, I know you, Candice.
I know you like to be the fancy one.
I know, uh [LAUGHS.]
God forbid anybody tries to be more interesting than you.
Or anybody tries to do anything that is, uh, not worth your approval.
And the only reason you're angry with me right now is because you're not in control of me.
Is that not true? Because you're so in control, right? You're so in control, you almost beat a man to death - with a fucking baguette, Van.
- Van? Again? [SIGHS.]
Enough, please.
Marcel, are these ready? - Yeah.
- Thank you.
Are those hands? [SCOFFS, CHUCKLES.]
We've been chasing hands all day? Yeah.
I will keep my remarks brief and in English for those of our foreign guests.
Thank you all for coming.
Tonight's meal, prepared by Marcel, is truly a sacred experience.
If you are here, it is because I know you appreciate and revere life's most beautiful experiences.
You will not be disappointed.
You all have in front of you a napkin.
While some of you may be familiar, I offer a reminder.
We will eat this meal with this napkin draped over our heads, as is traditional with Les Mains.
This is not out of shame, as some may speculate.
[SIZZLING.]
Quite the opposite.
It is to allow a private and sensuous moment with a meal.
A meal that I assure you rivals even the finest banquet at Mount Olympus.
And now, Les Main.
Bon appétit.
SHANICE: Let's go.
First class.
XOSHA: Girl, this is some high-end shit.
[CHUCKLES.]
SHANICE: I feel like I'm in Beauty and the Beast.
XOSHA: Mad exclusive.
SHANICE: Mm, smells amazing.
Kind of earthy.
- Hey, look.
- [SIGHS.]
If you want to live your life doing this crazy sh Shit, sorry.
Um Okay.
But what about your old life? Change is good, Candice.
Yeah.
But, I mean, what happens when your visa runs out? Marcel and I, we will get married.
It's easy.
[SNIFFS.]
Okay.
Have you talked to your parents? They're going to be thrilled for me.
They've always wanted me to get married.
They've always wanted to visit Paris.
Hmm.
And money? I am working, as you can see.
And Lottie? Where does she fit into all this? I'm going to, uh [CLEARS THROAT.]
I'm going to, uh bring her here.
With me.
Uh to eat hands? [BREATHING HEAVILY.]
- [VAN GASPS.]
- [DISHES CLATTER.]
Get out.
- Get out! - No, no, no, no, no.
- Get out! - No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
- [DISHES BREAKING.]
- No, no! Please, Van! - Get the fuck out of here! - MARCEL: What the fuck are you doing? - Van? - [GRUNTS.]
Get out! Van, stop! Arrête! - Arrête! - [DISHES BREAKING.]
[SCREAMING, CRYING.]
What the fuck am I doing here?! - What?! - [OBJECTS CLATTER.]
[CRIES.]
- [SCREAMS.]
- [OBJECTS CLATTER.]
[SCREAMS, GASPS.]
- [MUFFLED SCREAMS IN DISTANCE.]
- [QUIET CHATTER.]
XOSHA: Uh-uh-uh.
You hear that? SHANICE: Yeah, what is that? [VAN CONTINUES SCREAMING IN DISTANCE.]
Oh, my God, girl.
This is this is a hand! - Bitch, this is a whole hand.
- Oh, my God.
- [RETCHING.]
- Oh, my God.
Y'all are eating hands! Y'all, this is a hand.
Hello? - SHANICE: That's fucking gross.
- XOSHA: Oh, my God.
We need to get the fuck up out of here! - Where's Candice? - These people are crazy.
Come on.
Come on, come on, come on.
Eating hands, shit! All right! I'm starving! Where are these little hands? [HYPERVENTILATING.]
I want to see Lottie.
Where's Lottie? Where's Lottie? - Where's Lottie? - CANDICE: Van.
[STAMMERING.]
- Where's Lottie? - Hey, okay.
All right, we can find her.
- [CRYING, MUTTERING.]
- [WHISPERS.]
: I know.
I've just been feeling really off for a while.
I don't really know for how long, but Couple weeks ago, I was driving in Atlanta and this dark feeling came over me.
I, uh I [CHUCKLES.]
I closed my eyes.
I closed my eyes while I was driving.
And then I got got scared, so I opened my eyes, and I was in the opposite lane.
And once I realized what I was doing [SNIFFLES.]
I just cri-cried all the way home.
And I just, I thought about [SIGHS.]
How I'm a I'm a terrible mom.
And when I picked Lottie up from school, I just f I felt like she was looking at me, like like she knew what happened.
And that she hated me for it.
That I would do that to her.
So I I brought her to my mom's, and I bought a ticket to Europe.
I don't even remember that flight.
I just, I was just blacked out.
And I land in Amsterdam.
[LAUGHS.]
: Like, what the fuck am I doing in Amsterdam? And I couldn't sleep.
You know, this jet lag and I was watching TV all night, and I And then Amélie came on.
And then I was like, I want to be, I want to be Amélie, and I came here.
[LAUGHS.]
And I couldn't I couldn't Couldn't do that, either.
Well That's because you're cooler than Amélie.
[LAUGHS.]
: I'm not cooler than Amélie.
Yes, you are.
I don't even know who I am.
You know who you are.
Earn knows who he is.
Lottie knows who she is.
But who the fuck am I? I don't even know.
You're somebody.
[CRYING.]
: I-I don't know.
That's [INHALES DEEPLY.]
[EXHALES HEAVILY.]
Oh, my God.
You're gonna be okay.
Okay.
Don't you have to pee on someone? [LAUGHTER.]
Yes, I do.
He'll be fine.
I need to go home.
[SNIFFLES.]
CANDICE: [SIGHS.]
Let's go home.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
[DOOR OPENS.]
MAN: Hello? SHANICE: Uh, hi.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
Nice.
You can put your things by the door.
May I offer you some champagne? Cheese or grapes? No, I had, like, two bottles of Powerade for lunch.
Let's just do this.
Yeah.
Of course.
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
[URINE STREAMING.]
[URINE TRICKLING.]
[URINE CONTINUES.]
MAN [GURGLING.]
: Stop.
[LUDACRIS' "SPLASH WATERFALLS" PLAYING.]
Oh! Oh! ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to throw some game ♪ They both one and the same ♪ Cupid's the one to blame ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to shed some light ♪ 'Cause each and every night ♪ You gotta do it right ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ I'm 'bout to throw some game ♪ They both one and the same ♪ Cupid's the one to blame ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to shed some light ♪ 'Cause each and every night ♪ You got to do it right ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ They want it nice and slow ♪ Kiss 'em from head to toe ♪ Relax and let it go ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ They want it now and fast ♪ Grabbing and smacking ass ♪ You got to make it last ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ Together holding hands ♪ [RATTLING.]
[ENGINE IDLING.]
[DOOR CLOSES.]
- Hey.
- Earnest Marks? - Yeah.
- Sign here.
- What's this? - It's your bag.
I got all my bags.
- Your name Earnest Marks? - Yeah.
- You travel on May 8? - Yeah.
It's your bag.
Sign here.
I know this is not my bag.
Cool.
Have a nice day, bro.
[MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY.]
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
[PILLS RATTLING.]
Hmm.
[MUSIC CONTINUES FAINTLY.]
[DISTORTED SINGING.]
- [BICYCLE BELL DINGS.]
Can you elaborate on what you were saying? Oh, my God.
I don't want her to elaborate.
Listen, I have no problem elaborating.
Please, 'cause I'm gonna need some details.
- Oh, my God.
- Okay, so It's not like it's rocket science or nothing.
I just, you know, I pee on him.
He likes to be peed on.
- Ew.
- And he pays you? Girl, yes.
- He paid for your ticket out here? - Yes.
- And how much he pay you? - Oh, my God, y'all.
- Please.
- 6,000.
- Damn.
Really? - 6,000.
Girl, these French niggas is wild out here.
- Listen.
Yes.
- Just for some pee-pee? It ain't like he collecting it.
Okay.
Men have needs, okay? And I don't kink shame, because we are where, ladies? We are where? - SHANICE: En français? - CANDICE: En français.
Paris.
[LAUGHTER.]
Clink, clink.
Thank you, Candice, girl.
For including me and my cousin and bringing us on your, uh, "business trip.
" - It's business.
- [CHUCKLES.]
I feel like we needed this little girls' trip.
- True.
- I missed y'all crazy-asses, so - Aw.
- I missed you, too.
- Salud.
- Salud.
What's that mean? It's like "cheers.
" A European cheers.
European cheers.
Okay.
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, so, what's popping? Like, what are we about to get into? - This is my first time out here.
- Okay.
So, there is this Black historical walk that I read about.
And you follow, like, Langston Hughes, - Josephine Baker - Girl, no.
Um - Okay.
- Candice, can we do, like, something fun? Can we get into something crazy, please? - Please.
- Trust me well, I want to.
But it's a little tough, 'cause you kind of have to know a local to, like, really get into the crazy stuff.
- Really? - Then why don't you call your pee-pee boy? - [CHUCKLES.]
- Right.
No.
[CHUCKLES.]
SHANICE: What? - Oh, my God.
- SHANICE: What's going on? What? Girl, where are you going? SHANICE: The hell? [CONVERSING IN FRENCH.]
CANDICE: Van? [CONVERSATION IN FRENCH CONTINUES.]
CANDICE: Van? Hey.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Van, it's me.
It's Candice.
- Non Non.
- CANDICE: No? Désolée [IN FRENCH ACCENT.]
: Candice! I'm so sorry, chérie.
It is so good to see to see you.
[SIGHS.]
Et voilà.
Bon, you know, I never got your names.
- Shanice.
- I'm Xosha.
VAN: Oh, c'est très joli.
I love it.
So wonderful to meet you both.
I will get us something to celebrate.
S'il vous plaît, make yourself comfortable.
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING.]
SHANICE: Who is she? She your friend? Yeah, back in Atlanta.
SHANICE: You mean she ain't French? [SCOFFS.]
Girl, no.
- This girl crazy.
[LAUGHS.]
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh.
This is cute.
[PHONE CHIMING.]
[PHONE CONTINUES CHIMING.]
Et voilà.
I have a Domaine Chariot.
Hey, uh, who is this? That is Marcel, my partner, of course.
What How long have you been out here? Well, we met when I was working at his restaurant.
I was running the food.
Of course, he was the chef.
And, uh [CHUCKLES.]
I was such an idiot when I first came here.
So lost and alone, but then we met, and we were like magnets, you know.
Passion magnets, which I know you understand.
[VAN LAUGHS.]
Well, um, do you need any help in the kitchen? We can catch up.
What are you doing in Paris, actually? She came out here to pee on some nigga.
Oh, là là.
Uh, came out here to do more than that.
[VAN LAUGHS.]
But maybe we can catch up in private really quick.
You know, this reminds me I think I am running late.
Ah, bon.
I am running late.
[CHUCKLES.]
I have some errands to run, but, um Well, you are all welcome, of course.
I have, uh, friends.
They are How do you say? Uh, very cool.
Yes.
They will show you a good time.
So, yes, let us go.
Seize the day.
CANDICE: Ooh.
[QUIET CHATTER IN FRENCH.]
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Bonjour.
Bonjour.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER, LAUGHTER.]
SHANICE: She really got to take this bread - everywhere we go, huh? - [VAN SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Maybe it's security bread, like she don't feel French without it.
Just need to pick up some keys from my friend.
It should take five minutes.
Girl, this place is nice.
- Right? - It's fancy.
- Aw, baby ♪ - [KNOCKING.]
Yeah, Murder, Inc.
♪ I wanna love you, babe ♪ - ALEXANDER: Oh, hey, stranger.
- VAN: Hello, how are you? BOTH: Mm - Good to see you.
- Brought some friends.
Come on in.
- Hey, guys.
Hi.
- Hi.
Oh, my God.
Welcome to my suite, my sweets.
- Aw, baby ♪ - All right, sit Oh, sorry about all the mess in - I just wanna love you ♪ - Oh, this is embarrassing.
Here we go, mademoiselle.
- Mademoiselle.
- Nice.
I'm Alex, by the way.
- Yes.
[CHUCKLES.]
- We know who you are.
Very nice to meet you.
Always thinking of you, baby ♪ - [MOUTHING.]
- ALEXANDER: Hey.
- I think I like how your body ♪ - [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
- Missed you.
- Missed you.
Aw, baby, when you're kissing me ♪ - Aw, baby, when you're loving me ♪ - [MOANS.]
How good is this song? I've been listening to it on repeat all day.
Ashanti! Mm.
Is she still with Nelly, by the way? I don't, I don't think so.
- Nonstop with me ♪ - I love this song.
- It's good, huh? - Yeah.
I just wanna love you, baby ♪ I had this crazy idea that Hey, how-how about we just, uh, get naked.
Take our clothes off.
Can you take control of me? ♪ I just wanna love you, baby ♪ [LAUGHS.]
I don't I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I get these, like, crazy ideas.
Like, so random and completely inappropriate.
I apologize.
It's We don't want to do that.
Right? - I'm down.
I like it.
- We can.
Go ahead.
Go ahead.
[MUSIC CONTINUES IN DISTANCE.]
Stay at the door.
Make sure he doesn't come in.
CANDICE: Hey.
When the hell did you start fucking Alexander Skarsgård? What? When did you start fucking Alexander Skarsgård? I would appreciate it if you didn't ask me this kind of question.
He's very private about his sex life.
Okay.
I'm just saying What happened to your partner? Oh, don't be so judgmental.
You know the strongest relationships have blurred lines.
You should know this.
Don't be so American about this.
Van, what is that? - VAN: It's nothing.
- CANDICE: You can't do that.
- Van - Relax.
It's fine.
We do this every week.
No, Van, this is, like, crack.
You can't just He loves when I play games with him.
Ah! Here are the keys.
Okay.
Let's go.
Okay, ladies, um, time to go.
- Night and day ♪ - What? No.
You-you didn't even touch your Negroni.
VAN: Ladies, please! Hey, guy-guys, no.
Please stay.
Guys.
That was fun.
I loved you on True Blood.
We loved watching you dancing.
You're cold, Vanessa! Cold! [FEIGNED CRYING.]
: It's Alexander.
He's doing drugs again.
I think it's meth, but I can't be sure.
You have to call the police or securité or someone.
What are you doing? Go back to his room.
You know, he could die if you stay here! You have to run! Allez-y! Run, please! It's our last chance to save him! [CRYING.]
What the fuck was that? [LAUGHS.]
: Oh, darlings, don't worry.
It is just a little game, you know.
We do it, like, every week.
It is so totally fine.
It's like our little devil dance, you know.
[LAUGHS.]
: Xosha knows the devil dance.
Anyway, I have another stop to make, but if you want to come again, I am having a party tonight.
It should be, uh, très fun.
I mean, I'm down.
Shit, ain't like we got anything else to do.
- So yeah.
- Yes.
Let's go.
Come, just one more stop.
[SIGHS.]
Here we are.
It is nice, no? Vanessa, this feels like Candyman.
[CHUCKLES.]
It does, doesn't it? I-I think we'll just wait out here.
I wouldn't.
She really ain't put this bread down once.
- I fucks with it now.
- [SCOFFS.]
[MUFFLED FRENCH RAP PLAYING.]
Ew, that garbage smells like something died in it.
That is not how dead things smell.
O-Okay, look, Van.
Can we please talk? Because I'm being serious right now.
- You're really starting to scare me.
- [GROANS.]
What is so scary? You wanted to see Paris.
Voilà.
We're in Paris.
- WOMAN: Tarrare! - What was that? - Hey, what was that? - It's nothing.
Relax.
- Did she say "tarrare"? - I don't know.
- It sounded like a bird.
- Look, okay, whatever's going on, we can talk about it, okay? We can have some drinks, go back to the hotel room.
- Are you fucking kidding me? - What? Emilio.
He fucked me.
- He really fucked me.
- Hey, who's Emilio? Okay, who cares? Can we please just get out of here? - 'Cause I really don't feel safe.
- Is Emilio the plug? Is this drugs, Van? Are you selling drugs? Well, let me get some Molly, then.
- [GASPS.]
- WOMAN: Tarrare! Shit.
We have to go.
[VAN SPEAKS FRENCH.]
Merde.
Fucking Emilio.
[STAMMERS.]
Wait-wait, what What's happening? - Like - WOMAN: Tarrare! CANDICE: Who are these guys? Van, Van.
What do they want? There's nothing more I can do.
If this is the way this is the way.
Tarrare.
Okay, why do they keep calling you Tarrare? [SCOFFS.]
He was the man who ate a baby.
[SHOUTING IN FRENCH.]
[GRUNTING.]
VAN: Viens, viens! CANDICE: Come on.
[INDISTINCT P.
A.
ANNOUNCEMENT.]
Where are we going? She hasn't said anything this entire time.
I know, she seems mad.
Is she okay? No.
She's not.
Van! - [TIRES SCREECH.]
- [HORN HONKS.]
[MAN SHOUTING IN FRENCH.]
Oh, shit.
Come on.
SHANICE: [CHUCKLES.]
The fuck? [KNOCKING LOUDLY.]
- [GASPS.]
- Chéri, ça va? - Mwah, mwah.
Mon bébé.
- [LAUGHS.]
I'm so glad you texted me.
I was losing my mind in there, you know? - Bien sûr.
[LAUGHS.]
- Long day.
But you can visit any time.
- Ces sont tes amies? - Oui.
Candice, Xosha et Shanice.
- CARLOS: Salut.
- VAN: È belle.
You know, I have an engagement present for you and Emilio.
I have to give it to you both, because I missed your party.
No, you're always so thoughtful.
- We missed you, you know.
- I know.
It's so sad.
Alors, I haven't seen Emilio in [EXHALES.]
forever.
Do you know where he is? Bébé, what luck.
- Emilio is inside! [LAUGHS.]
- [GASPS.]
Non, ce n'est pas vrai! He has also come for a visit.
Could we say a quick hello? - Of course.
- Okay, come on.
On y va.
- [DOOR SHUTS.]
- My love.
Look who has come to visit.
Salut, Emilio.
[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY.]
Look, okay.
Please, I am sorry.
It's a misunderstanding.
I-I have the package, but but the package is for someone else.
Did Delphine ring you? On, no, sh-sh-she was supposed to ring you.
- Is this true, Emilio? - What's going on? Oh, nothing, my lion.
Uh, I promise.
Carlos, can you get someone to bring us some wine and some cheese? Oh, and for her friends, whatever they want.
- No.
No.
- Wine? Yeah? I think we will be just fine with some, uh, pain? Bread? Okay, okay.
Okay, everyone.
Please, everyone, go.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Merci.
Merci.
Please.
Please, please.
Please, you know me.
Come on, Van, you know me.
If you leave a baguette sitting out for a week you're crazy.
Why would you? It would get stale.
[LOUD THUD.]
And hard.
But what if you leave it out for two weeks? Or three weeks? Or or six months? How hard and how stale would it become? - [GRUNTS.]
- Oh, my God! [PANTING, GRUNTING.]
[EMILIO SCREAMING.]
[VAN EXCLAIMS.]
- It was worth the wait.
- Oh, my God.
The bread was worth the wait.
- [GRUNTING.]
- Okay, okay, Van, Van, please.
- Where is the package? - Please.
Van, please.
- [SPEAKING FRENCH.]
- Oh, all right.
- I mean All right, all right.
- [VAN LAUGHS.]
Emilio.
Where is the package? [PANTING.]
: I I can get you another bundle tomorrow.
Oh, no.
Today, Emilio.
- Van, please! - [VAN GROANS.]
- [WHIMPERS.]
- Open your mouth.
Huh? Either way, you will have to open your mouth.
Whether it is to tell me about the package, or to sink your teeth into this.
All right, all right.
It's It's in the vase.
The vase.
Shanice, retrieve the package.
[WHIMPERS.]
[SIGHS.]
No, the other vase.
- Just grab it, please.
- Okay, bet.
VAN: Vas-y, vas-y.
Come on.
[VAN CLEARS THROAT.]
Emilio don't come to dinner tonight.
Carlos, I am so sorry.
Shall we, ladies? It's drugs, isn't it? [VAN LAUGHS.]
- [LIVELY CHATTER.]
- [UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING.]
[CHATTER AND MUFFLED MUSIC CONTINUE.]
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
[CONVERSING IN FRENCH.]
We were beginning to worry.
Well, I had some surprise friends from out of town come.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
We have extra seats.
Please stay for dinner.
- Oh, no, no, no.
We won't be staying.
- What? Why not? Uh, give me a second.
Um, because we weren't invited, Xosha.
She just invited us.
Okay, and we had a really long day that we need to recover from.
Okay, well, we was just talking about This morning, you was complaining about, "There's nothing really fun to do," and Yeah.
You were saying how to find the cool stuff we have to know a local.
Boom, there go some locals.
Something is wrong, all right? I know this is all fun and games to y'all, but there is something seriously wrong with Van right now.
Girl, let her live her life.
Yeah, I mean, she ain't hurting nobody.
I mean, okay, she's hurting people, but they're seemingly people who deserve to be hurt.
She has blood on a baguette that she's carrying around.
You're only saying that because you don't know her.
Yeah, we don't, but I like whoever this is.
- SHANICE: I'm-a go grab a drink.
- Yeah.
Me, too.
Sorry, girl.
Hey, excuse me.
- Can I talk to you? - Oh.
[SLOW CLAP.]
Bravo.
You really fucked me back there.
Paparazzi got ahold of the story.
I might lose the Baby Shark movie now.
Don't you ever do that again.
[SPITS.]
Let's go meet Marcel.
[DEPARTING FOOTSTEPS.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Think you can just humiliate me like that? Huh? [BREATHING HEAVILY.]
[MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY ON RADIO.]
- Hey, Van.
- Ça va, chéri? - Et toi? - Oh, Marcel.
Mm.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
I missed you.
Ah, where the fuck were you, huh? Emilio, he really fucked us this time.
- I'm not doing it again.
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, before I forget, this is my friend, Candice.
We both met while we were stripping on that river cruise.
- [CHUCKLES.]
- Oh, of course.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
We need to talk.
Right now.
[SPEAKING FRENCH.]
Uh, you want to talk? Yeah.
What the fuck is going on? Merci.
What, you don't approve of my lifestyle? No.
No.
You're done You're done making me feel like I'm crazy.
Okay, 'cause today was nowhere near normal, Van.
Oh, mon Dieu.
Does Earn know you're here? Does anyone know that you're here? Does your parents know that you're here, Van? Because don't think I didn't clock your phone blowing up.
What? A very busy woman cannot receive many phone calls? God, can you just please talk normal? - I am talking normal.
- Without the fake accent, Van.
[STAMMERS.]
What are you doing? Really, like, what-what are you doing here? What are you doing here? Peeing on some guy? No, it's-it's very interesting.
You know, I know you, Candice.
I know you like to be the fancy one.
I know, uh [LAUGHS.]
God forbid anybody tries to be more interesting than you.
Or anybody tries to do anything that is, uh, not worth your approval.
And the only reason you're angry with me right now is because you're not in control of me.
Is that not true? Because you're so in control, right? You're so in control, you almost beat a man to death - with a fucking baguette, Van.
- Van? Again? [SIGHS.]
Enough, please.
Marcel, are these ready? - Yeah.
- Thank you.
Are those hands? [SCOFFS, CHUCKLES.]
We've been chasing hands all day? Yeah.
I will keep my remarks brief and in English for those of our foreign guests.
Thank you all for coming.
Tonight's meal, prepared by Marcel, is truly a sacred experience.
If you are here, it is because I know you appreciate and revere life's most beautiful experiences.
You will not be disappointed.
You all have in front of you a napkin.
While some of you may be familiar, I offer a reminder.
We will eat this meal with this napkin draped over our heads, as is traditional with Les Mains.
This is not out of shame, as some may speculate.
[SIZZLING.]
Quite the opposite.
It is to allow a private and sensuous moment with a meal.
A meal that I assure you rivals even the finest banquet at Mount Olympus.
And now, Les Main.
Bon appétit.
SHANICE: Let's go.
First class.
XOSHA: Girl, this is some high-end shit.
[CHUCKLES.]
SHANICE: I feel like I'm in Beauty and the Beast.
XOSHA: Mad exclusive.
SHANICE: Mm, smells amazing.
Kind of earthy.
- Hey, look.
- [SIGHS.]
If you want to live your life doing this crazy sh Shit, sorry.
Um Okay.
But what about your old life? Change is good, Candice.
Yeah.
But, I mean, what happens when your visa runs out? Marcel and I, we will get married.
It's easy.
[SNIFFS.]
Okay.
Have you talked to your parents? They're going to be thrilled for me.
They've always wanted me to get married.
They've always wanted to visit Paris.
Hmm.
And money? I am working, as you can see.
And Lottie? Where does she fit into all this? I'm going to, uh [CLEARS THROAT.]
I'm going to, uh bring her here.
With me.
Uh to eat hands? [BREATHING HEAVILY.]
- [VAN GASPS.]
- [DISHES CLATTER.]
Get out.
- Get out! - No, no, no, no, no.
- Get out! - No, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
- [DISHES BREAKING.]
- No, no! Please, Van! - Get the fuck out of here! - MARCEL: What the fuck are you doing? - Van? - [GRUNTS.]
Get out! Van, stop! Arrête! - Arrête! - [DISHES BREAKING.]
[SCREAMING, CRYING.]
What the fuck am I doing here?! - What?! - [OBJECTS CLATTER.]
[CRIES.]
- [SCREAMS.]
- [OBJECTS CLATTER.]
[SCREAMS, GASPS.]
- [MUFFLED SCREAMS IN DISTANCE.]
- [QUIET CHATTER.]
XOSHA: Uh-uh-uh.
You hear that? SHANICE: Yeah, what is that? [VAN CONTINUES SCREAMING IN DISTANCE.]
Oh, my God, girl.
This is this is a hand! - Bitch, this is a whole hand.
- Oh, my God.
- [RETCHING.]
- Oh, my God.
Y'all are eating hands! Y'all, this is a hand.
Hello? - SHANICE: That's fucking gross.
- XOSHA: Oh, my God.
We need to get the fuck up out of here! - Where's Candice? - These people are crazy.
Come on.
Come on, come on, come on.
Eating hands, shit! All right! I'm starving! Where are these little hands? [HYPERVENTILATING.]
I want to see Lottie.
Where's Lottie? Where's Lottie? - Where's Lottie? - CANDICE: Van.
[STAMMERING.]
- Where's Lottie? - Hey, okay.
All right, we can find her.
- [CRYING, MUTTERING.]
- [WHISPERS.]
: I know.
I've just been feeling really off for a while.
I don't really know for how long, but Couple weeks ago, I was driving in Atlanta and this dark feeling came over me.
I, uh I [CHUCKLES.]
I closed my eyes.
I closed my eyes while I was driving.
And then I got got scared, so I opened my eyes, and I was in the opposite lane.
And once I realized what I was doing [SNIFFLES.]
I just cri-cried all the way home.
And I just, I thought about [SIGHS.]
How I'm a I'm a terrible mom.
And when I picked Lottie up from school, I just f I felt like she was looking at me, like like she knew what happened.
And that she hated me for it.
That I would do that to her.
So I I brought her to my mom's, and I bought a ticket to Europe.
I don't even remember that flight.
I just, I was just blacked out.
And I land in Amsterdam.
[LAUGHS.]
: Like, what the fuck am I doing in Amsterdam? And I couldn't sleep.
You know, this jet lag and I was watching TV all night, and I And then Amélie came on.
And then I was like, I want to be, I want to be Amélie, and I came here.
[LAUGHS.]
And I couldn't I couldn't Couldn't do that, either.
Well That's because you're cooler than Amélie.
[LAUGHS.]
: I'm not cooler than Amélie.
Yes, you are.
I don't even know who I am.
You know who you are.
Earn knows who he is.
Lottie knows who she is.
But who the fuck am I? I don't even know.
You're somebody.
[CRYING.]
: I-I don't know.
That's [INHALES DEEPLY.]
[EXHALES HEAVILY.]
Oh, my God.
You're gonna be okay.
Okay.
Don't you have to pee on someone? [LAUGHTER.]
Yes, I do.
He'll be fine.
I need to go home.
[SNIFFLES.]
CANDICE: [SIGHS.]
Let's go home.
[DOORBELL RINGS.]
[DOOR OPENS.]
MAN: Hello? SHANICE: Uh, hi.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
Nice.
You can put your things by the door.
May I offer you some champagne? Cheese or grapes? No, I had, like, two bottles of Powerade for lunch.
Let's just do this.
Yeah.
Of course.
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
[URINE STREAMING.]
[URINE TRICKLING.]
[URINE CONTINUES.]
MAN [GURGLING.]
: Stop.
[LUDACRIS' "SPLASH WATERFALLS" PLAYING.]
Oh! Oh! ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to throw some game ♪ They both one and the same ♪ Cupid's the one to blame ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to shed some light ♪ 'Cause each and every night ♪ You gotta do it right ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ I'm 'bout to throw some game ♪ They both one and the same ♪ Cupid's the one to blame ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ I'm 'bout to shed some light ♪ 'Cause each and every night ♪ You got to do it right ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ They want it nice and slow ♪ Kiss 'em from head to toe ♪ Relax and let it go ♪ - Say it ♪ - Make love to me ♪ They want it now and fast ♪ Grabbing and smacking ass ♪ You got to make it last ♪ - What? ♪ - Fuck me ♪ Together holding hands ♪ [RATTLING.]
[ENGINE IDLING.]
[DOOR CLOSES.]
- Hey.
- Earnest Marks? - Yeah.
- Sign here.
- What's this? - It's your bag.
I got all my bags.
- Your name Earnest Marks? - Yeah.
- You travel on May 8? - Yeah.
It's your bag.
Sign here.
I know this is not my bag.
Cool.
Have a nice day, bro.
[MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY.]
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
[PILLS RATTLING.]
Hmm.
[MUSIC CONTINUES FAINTLY.]
[DISTORTED SINGING.]