Billions (2016) s03e10 Episode Script
Redemption
1 [Ben Kim.]
Previously on Billions We're doing a massive cap raise.
And quickly.
First money post-indictment precludes institutional investors.
We need the icebreaker now.
[Axe.]
We need Grigor Andolov.
[Grigor.]
There was this little boy.
And I take his mother away from the square.
Behind the soldiers.
After, I leave her for the soldiers.
This little boy, do you know what happened to him? No.
No one ever knows.
Bryan Connerty, meet the head of the New York office.
Assistant Director Frances Lynch.
Hi.
- You cool here, Kate? - Yes.
I am.
Unless you're going to swing on me like some Irish punk? They say you can't ride two horses with one behind, but in today's business world, it's a smart move, Still pretty sharp for an old dog.
When we spoke this morning, you were in California.
[Taylor.]
You came to help me with the algorithm? [Langstraat.]
To keep you company.
[Axe.]
You are now officially but unofficially the proud owner of half of my half of Panay's fund, You decide what's right and what's wrong.
With no one to appease.
You're forgetting Jock Jeffcoat.
[Chuck.]
His thumb pressing down on me I don't like it.
[Wendy.]
It's not enough to resist [Wendy.]
or not resist Jock anymore.
You have to assassinate this motherfucker.
dramatic music dramatic music [tires screech in distance.]
dramatic music [car door closes.]
They call it the wood, isn't that right, Mr.
Kornbluth? That they do.
The front page.
Even though almost no one reads it on paper anymore.
Oh, they'll bring back the bulldog edition for this one.
Carrie Caminetti Buffalo mayoral candidate? Buffalo bunko man.
Pay to play.
Corruption.
Bribery.
It's all in there and, though we're indicting, you didn't get it from me.
What do you want in return? Everything you have every innuendo, allegation, intimation that you couldn't substantiate, that you've been too scared to run, that your editor has killed On? Jock Jeffcoat.
You're going after your boss? Or am I protecting him? By finding out what's floating around on him.
You'd be pacing the perimeter with only a walkie and pistol.
He's already well insulated behind the moat and drawbridge.
Texas style.
The thing is: he's a rich man.
Everyone knows that.
What's he worth, ten, fifteen mill? No, Chuck.
Whispers are: twenty times that.
Has PR folks whose sole job is to keep him out of the financial press.
Even when he was governor.
There always have been rumors as to the way he earned it.
Many center around his brother.
The televangelist.
Right, and the ownership of the networks he broadcasts on.
Wow.
All that hidden money.
Amazing.
Most folks these days want everyone to think they're richer than they are.
Unless they don't want questions about how they got it.
I've received a tip that I'm honor bound to pursue.
On Jock Jeffcoat.
Mm.
Sweet Mary the Mother Blessed.
And Joseph the Carpenter too.
[chuckles.]
I'd like your help to investigate.
Need it.
[chuckles lightly.]
But this is dangerous.
For both of you.
So I want to give you the chance to bail, right now, at no cost to you.
suspenseful music Good.
Noted and appreciated.
Now Jock's brother is a Billy Graham revivalist type [Allerd.]
Yes.
During the Attorney General vetting process, they went deep on him, I remember Oh, me too.
Instead of a tent, he has a mega-church.
They broadcast to a loose network of cable TV stations nationwide.
Which may be the open flank.
As the story is: the brother owns those stations.
And that never came out publicly.
Even during the vet.
They must've planned for that years ahead.
So they must have a reason for wanting to hide it.
We'll dive into that.
People inside the organization are likely to be loyal.
So find some who left.
Accountants.
Lawyers.
The New York Jews he'd hire who got tired of the Texas Two-Step and quit.
Maybe there's some rancor.
I'll spread some rootie-tooties around, make something happen.
Okay.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
Ask the question.
Well, I couldn't help but think of a person who knows a thing or two about media deals.
Mm.
I'm going to have to insist that we leave my father out of this.
I can't have his name written down and talked about.
I cannot have him becoming a target for Jock.
Of course.
I won't ask you to go to him.
Thank you.
[tennis ball hits racquet.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
- [grunts.]
- Ohh! [speaking Russian.]
[speaking Russian.]
She says you have a real forehand.
Do a thing, do it well.
Your mother teach you that? The opposite, maybe.
Thanks for setting this up.
Listen, Axe, I'm pulling capital.
suspenseful music All of it? 1.
5 billion.
Oh, that's almost half the investment.
I got a good opportunity.
Good for you.
A Russian oil venture.
What you would call a "mortal lock.
" Your money just landed.
I put it in, I take it out.
I shake it all about.
You know I normally have a quarterly gate for people with new money.
But as a courtesy to you I let you come in without that restriction.
And I appreciate the courtesy.
Now I must take advantage.
[speaking Russian.]
[speaking Russian.]
What'd he say? To let you win next time.
I told him that's never gonna happen.
You're way too smart to believe that anyway.
You got that right.
[zipper opens.]
Thanks.
It was awesome.
Wags, rally the team.
We need to step up the timeline on the raise.
[door opens.]
The AG is here.
When you say "here"? [Donna.]
Mr.
Jeffcoat is in the library.
General! Had I known, I'd've organized a marching band.
In no mood to be serenaded.
On my way in from the airport I couldn't help but notice what a shithole some areas are.
Yes, well, there's underprivileged people living out there in low-income Shitholes, Chuck.
Gave me an idea.
Well, it was Giuliani's brainstorm first, back in the golden era of Reagan.
But I'm gonna bring it back like bell bottoms.
We are.
Federal Day.
I don't think a Federal Day is really going to change very much It will for a spell.
That's more than you've done.
You and your counterparts are going to grab up every city and state drug case tomorrow and make them our cases.
We are going to prosecute.
And hard.
You want to deploy federal resources in prosecuting dime bag amounts in housing projects and the like? It is my fondest wish.
- [laughs.]
- [chuckles.]
Ooh, by the by, um I have the missus in tow with me on this trip.
And, uh, she's mentioned how she's grown tired of restaurant eating on the road.
Oh.
We both have [chuckling.]
Oh, well, why are you eating in restaurants, when Wendy and I live here?! - Oh, Chuck - No, no, you'll, uh you'll come for dinner.
What a neighborly offer.
We gladly accept.
Good.
Great.
Well, all right.
Great.
Okay.
Very good.
Okay, we need to move quickly on the cap raise.
The Sex Wax is going on the surfboard as we speak.
Getting into the spirit of talking to the primes [Taylor.]
I mean to say: we are well positioned.
I've been backchanneling with them, and landing that Grigor money lubricates as you said it would it's telling the story that we are back.
- Danger, Will Robinson! - The fuck, Spyros? I couldn't stop him, he said it was DEFCON six urgent.
The DEFCON scale only goes to five Exactly.
- And one is the most severe.
- Whatever.
We just had 1.
5 big ones pulled out of the firm.
- Oh, shit - Yeah.
That can only be one person It's Grigor Andolov.
And just so you know for the future: you don't have walk-in privileges.
Sugarpova? High end! Yumster! [bags crinkle.]
You knew? You were going to have us lie in the raise meetings.
I thought I had a few more days until the redemption, which meant all the meetings we had wouldn't have been lies.
The Street will see the drop in assets under management and read it as one of two things: redemptions or loss.
Either way fucks the cap raise.
Yeah, so.
We lever up big, and quick.
Leverage on that scale would have to flow from the institutions.
The Street will know we're fucked.
Well, you have an alternative? I do.
Frotty Anisman.
- Gross.
- Who? Liquid as hell.
He works outside the main of the business.
[Wags.]
He's a middle man for big money [Wags.]
Middle Eastern money, South American money, dictators, anyone who's got it.
Sounds somewhat ideal.
You don't know him.
That is an unpalatable idea, Wags.
Does that mean it's a no? It's an unpalatable idea Taylor, scour the floor for any quick plays to make up the shortfall.
Obscure the reason, but make it clear the timeframe is now.
Say it.
Carly.
Victor.
Panay.
All the satellite funds.
Bring them onboard.
Now, that's a fucking good idea But the one thing more important than giving oxygen to the fire of Axe Cap is keeping my escape hatches open in case those pricks from the government ever come after me again.
So, maybe, Raul.
Time to call the cops.
Bring his fund back to the mothership.
dramatic music Raul, I got a treat for you tonight.
This is the ramen that blew Osakisan's mind in Tokyo.
- [chuckles.]
- Enjoy.
Thanks, Ivan.
This is for you.
It's your piece of Panay.
The PIN is the date you came to Axe Cap.
Prosperous day for us both.
As they shall continue to be.
More so once you've come back.
Shit.
Come on, we've had some quiet success with Panay.
With your hand on the wheel, sure, but my board of directors likes quiet.
Your board likes Devin Hester returns and I'm the only one who can take their money a hundred and nine yards to the promised land.
You're doing that.
Through Panay.
Still too soon.
Okay, if you're not gonna come back yourself, go to work for me.
Firefighters pension fund, Sanitation workers fund, Corrections officers convince 'em to come onboard Axe Cap.
Come on, feed me some red meat, man.
You'll get a cut.
You putting me out on the street like I used to with my runny nosed junkie CIs.
Yeah, that drive in your pocket's gonna give you a lot more motivation than the crumpled twenties and the methadone tabs you used to give them.
I'll make some calls.
And I won't ask why you're so desperate for this immediate cash infusion suspenseful music [Franklin Sacker.]
I almost didn't take this meeting.
Because Kate would have called me, told me the agenda if it were something on the actual agenda.
So you both need something from me but you're here alone.
You didn't want her compromised by asking.
[glasses clink.]
Well, uh there's a reason you're where you are in life, Franklin.
- There are many.
- Mm.
Luck prominent among them.
Mm.
[chuckles.]
And, yes, certain tools, skills, abilities.
How can I use those to benefit you today? Good.
Let's go right at it.
Yes.
I'm trying to understand how a particular set of deals would have been made several years back.
Local television station deals.
In Texas.
By powerful government officials.
Dangerous ground for anyone to look at these days.
More so for you.
Kind of man would I be if I let that danger stop me? Are you particularly focused on deals that revolve around a religious center and its ability to broadcast its message widely? I am.
I should be.
Right? Follow me closely here.
I can't engage.
Can't talk specifically about it.
I have a duty to my board and shareholders not to get the company on the shit list of the most powerful lawman in the country and I must hew to that.
suspenseful music Let's speak more broadly, then.
Philosophically Not going to sit here and run you through how land deals Whose land? Exactly.
How those deals were struck a decade ago to allow wires to run across half the state.
How land leases, conservation areas and water rights might have been eminent domained and such.
And what that might have cost who.
And who might have benefited.
I'd never ask you to give me that kind of info, for the record.
No, that'd be helping me.
Which you are not.
The last time I was in Texas, Jock was still governor.
And had oversight over the entire state.
You know that.
What you don't know is the ways in which he wielded that influence.
We all, every one of us in the media landscape, had to kiss his ring.
After that, I thought: been there, done that.
And stayed away.
Never thinking he'd end up in a place where he could do more damage.
Unless someone, somehow stopped him.
You're white-knuckling your necktie.
- What is it? - [Chuck.]
[sighs.]
Um we're having dinner with the Attorney General and his wife.
Tonight.
Oh.
Where are we going? Well, they've, uh they've, uh, tired of restaurant eating.
[chuckles.]
Restaurant eating? [Chuck.]
[scoffs.]
That's like being tired of air flying.
What other kind is there? [smacks lips.]
I'm really supposed to cook for these people? [sighs.]
Do we know anything about Mrs.
Jeffcoat? Uh goes by Anne.
Actually, that's her name.
Probably goes by Mother.
[sighs.]
So we're doing this? Fuck.
We're doing this.
[sighs.]
Well, I'm not putting on an apron.
That's not a story they're leaving with.
What then? [keyboard clacking.]
A quick thing? - Sure.
- [beep.]
[Helena.]
Spartan-Ives for you.
[Barkow.]
Axe, I've got Kansas City in town.
[Barkow.]
The Heavy Construction Laborers Union fund.
They heard you got your icebreaker.
They're coming to you for a meeting.
Starting investment is 500 million.
Well, we'll see about upping that number.
Send them in.
Just a warning: they're straitlaced.
I'm taking them to Cats, not The Box.
Okay.
So we'll give them milk with their Michter's.
[button clicks.]
And when we're sitting at the table with 'em, you sell them the car with the Tru-Coat sealant you hear? Go Bears! You came in for something.
A minor key personal thing.
Can you arrange NoMad for me and some out of town guests? Sure.
Oscar isn't wired in New York? He is, but I want to deliver this for him as a present.
It's a business thing, a little celebration.
Okay.
I'll call Will Guidara now.
[door opens.]
[Allerd.]
You really are starting a war.
Like Costner did in Wolves.
Riding right up to the enemy line, letting 'em take their shots at you, almost daring them to kill you.
Like him, I am the walking wounded already.
Might as well go out Bon Jovi style.
Blaze of Glory, huh? You've worked for me a long while, Kate, you've studied hard.
Good one.
So we can't talk you out of this one? No.
But we can be more careful than Mr.
Costner was.
So as not to tip off Main Justice until the case is built.
Not easy.
We refer to this defendant as "Anonymous" so we don't have to notify the Inspector General and do a Special Grand Jury, which would blow this whole thing up.
We have to build this one alone.
And yeah.
That ain't gonna be easy.
But, hey, if we wanted to be in the "easy" business, we'd have gone to med school.
I really have taught you well.
So the guy you need to see is Ashley Cutler.
He's a principal at Cutler Wealth Management.
It's that New York City hedge fund that manages the financial assets of Jock's brother's megachurch.
Why don't I go over there? Because Cutler Wealth Management is a front.
suspenseful music [Sacker.]
It's a broom closet in Midtown.
What's behind it? We don't know yet.
But we drilled down and found his residence.
Expensive property outside of Newburgh.
His EZ Pass and his phone have him at the house.
You can't take your government car.
Rental, in my name, in the garage.
Good.
I should get on the road, I have a dinner I really can't miss.
I thought we were making progress.
When I'd heard you'd stood up to Dollar Bill.
Me too! But it didn't last.
I think the snap back made me even more timid, somehow.
What happened today? You know we're looking for short term cash generators.
[Ben Kim.]
I have one.
[both urinating.]
I'd like to talk, um, to you later.
I have, maybe, I might have an idea to generate alpha, quickly.
Go! [urinating continues.]
Here? This is where it all happens.
Let fly.
Now.
I've - [slosh.]
- uh been tracking rental car companies for years.
[Taylor.]
Is this an automotive play? [Taylor.]
Because we're well covered in that space.
- [toilet flushes.]
- It isn't.
But there's a kernel of an idea that's grown - And? - [stall door closes.]
[Ben Kim.]
But I couldn't pitch it.
And then, I couldn't even go Go? It's hard to concentrate with all of you watching right now.
[Ben Kim.]
Pee.
I had pee fright.
Come on.
Let's walk.
We do assessments of everyone who works here.
To see who might be a candidate for one of these offices.
The C-suite offices? That's right.
Most of the time it just confirms that most folks are exactly where they should be.
They've topped out.
Or worse, are going to bottom out.
Is that what mine says? Would I have brought you up here if you were bottoming out? No? Well, actually, I might.
If I thought you needed a jolt.
But this is not that.
This is: right now, at this moment, if you want to finally live the fuck up to your potential instead of spiraling, you must find a way to shift the paradigm.
That could be your office, or that.
CIO, picking the strategies.
COO, managing the risk.
Eh Maybe even Owner? Yes, instead of being down there, with them.
But that's where I'm comfortable.
No.
It's where you've made yourself fit.
Because you're so bound up in being the smallest, most helpful, unobtrusive version of yourself.
Just like your mother shits on your head for.
Now, what you need to do to prove her wrong, and prove it to yourself, is something totally out of character, big and bold.
Something public, that terrifies you, in order to free yourself.
Like recite a sonnet to a crowd.
Invite the office to see you skydive.
Become a Toastmaster.
Something totally out of character.
You have to break through the confidence barrier, because then you'll break through the C-suite barrier, too.
dramatic music [elevator bell chimes.]
Sorry man, firefighters won't touch you.
They sprint into burning buildings but they're afraid of us? It's not fear, Wags, they're still pissed about 9/11.
A little bit.
What about Sanitation? Too many retired firefighters in that union.
It's a no-go.
If it's one thing I know about you it's that that wasn't your only idea.
You'll move on to the next one and make it work.
Not sure the next one's fully formed.
That's because you keep looking backwards to the kind of people who used to invest with you.
Instead of forward to the sort of folks you can get now.
You have to change.
That's what I learned on the job.
Six percent of the class gets promoted to lieutenant.
Other guys, they got a choice.
They either accept that they were left behind.
Or they claw themselves forward taking shit assignments no one else is willing to take.
Hope to edge up from there.
suspenseful music [shakes hands.]
[shakes hands.]
[elevator door chimes.]
Alright.
Let's book that unpalatable meeting on City Island.
[birds chirping.]
[doorbell rings.]
[door opens.]
Hello.
I'm here to see Mr.
Cutler.
I'm sorry, sir, Mr.
Cutler's not here.
Really? 'Cause I have information that says he is.
He packed some things.
He's gone.
Look, uh I am the United States Attorney for the Southern District of New York.
It's an official matter.
You can check suspenseful music Cutler's on the lam or he went to the AG.
Either way, he didn't want to be tracked.
Uh impossible.
He couldn't have known you were coming.
Have you two been making your calls on government landlines? Encrypted wireless.
Good.
We have to find him.
Sacker, you got FBI you can trust? Yeah, I got a guy I can ask.
He's solid.
Do it.
[door handle clicks.]
Let's make this quick.
Gotta get back for Gordie's birthday.
Mmm.
Mm-hmm.
[slurping.]
Mmm.
Hey, listen, I could do about six more of these.
I'll bet.
You want? No? Oh! Ah, shit! [grumbles.]
Alright.
Look, Axey, you're sitting with me.
So I know you must be desperate as a fraternity pledge who can't find a date for the screw-your-brother dance.
Yeah, well, there's a window into your youth I could've done without right now.
[chuckles.]
No.
But what you must need is capital.
I'll provide it.
I'll move in my Jordanian investors, as a purchase of twenty percent of your fund, passively, no controls at all on investment, management, risk, anything like that.
So what do you want, apart from the payout that you get year to year? There are men who would be too proud to tell you.
You're not one of them.
I want you to slap my name on the ass end of yours, so it's Axe/Anisman Capital.
There'll be no ass slapping of any kind, Frotty.
It's Axe Cap.
And it will stay that way until they drop me in a hole and toss the dirt in.
Fine.
Alright.
Forget the name.
But, uh I need your glow.
I want you to hug me in public.
Come to my conference in Tulsa, tell folks I am a wise counselor whose words have great weight for you.
You think standing next to our boy will make that mirepoix of psoriasis, dandruff, and irritable bowel syndrome disappear? I don't have IBS.
Technically.
And yes I do think so.
Because while he's surfed above it all, I've been treated like Eddie Mush with a pocketbook.
Mm? If you want my Jordanian money, you got to cuddle up.
[chair clacks.]
[sighs.]
I'll agree.
With one condition: If I want to buy you out in a year give you your money back with a profit you have to let me.
I need that freedom.
[scoffs.]
Well, that's why you couldn't make this deal with an institution.
No one would ever agree to that.
Fine.
At a forty percent premium.
[sighs.]
Okay, Frotty.
We'll sign the deal at Axe Cap tomorrow.
I can't wait to fucking announce this! Hey.
Alright.
You guys want one of these, huh? They're Wellfleet's.
They're plump and briny, like my dream dates.
[chuckles.]
Hmm? No? Hey.
Alright.
[indistinct conversations.]
Hey boys [sports announcer talking indistinctly.]
Hi, Dad.
Nice you showed up for your own kid's party.
An hour late.
Well, looks like everybody's got right into the spirit of it without me.
Should we have waited to get started? Wow, you open any door in this fucking city, the dregs blow right in.
Well, this is my apartment.
So can't keep me out.
Enjoying that? Hells to the yeah.
[Bruno.]
Pizza's ready in five minutes! [wood clacking, sliding.]
Bruno Sorry to encroach.
[oven door closes.]
I had a feeling I'd see ya, but Gordie likes the pies.
[chuckling.]
Well Look, whatever went down between us, I'd do anything for your kids.
Oh, fuck I never meant for business to get between us.
Eh I should've never brought it to you in the first place.
Friendship should stay clean.
Cent'ann'.
To your beautiful family.
Alright.
Let me ask you something.
When you started out way back, everybody else in the neighborhood, they took juiced up money, Shylock money, mob money.
So how did you stay away from it all these years? Ahh, kid, the kind of money those guys give you, I mean, it's not like the points on a regular loan.
You end up renting out a hundred percent of your own ass.
- [chuckles.]
- Huh? No seed money is worth that suspenseful music So I scraped it together myself.
Right.
And I had my family looking at me like I was a hero, a good man.
I never wanted to lose that.
[chuckles.]
You kid Alright, come on! I got pizza! Hot and ready.
Come on! - Hell yeah! - I got a Margherita.
[Bruno.]
I got a clam with bacon.
[Bruno.]
I got a pepperoni coming up You grind up about four pounds of fresh meat.
Anything's acceptable rabbit, possum, unidentified.
Stay away from skunk, though, since its odiferousness tends to have a negative effect on the final result.
And that's Texas Roadkill Chili? It is indeed.
Smells a little bit like this tuna.
Hm.
[sighs.]
Your cook seems good.
Mm.
Where's Chuck? [inhales sharply.]
[thud, tires screech.]
Fuck.
[thumping.]
[tire flapping.]
[gearshift clicks.]
Oh, motherfucker.
[sighs.]
No service.
Oh, motherfucker.
MOTHERFUCKER.
[jack rattling.]
[sighs.]
[groans.]
Where he's gonna run Tell me where he roams Could you perchance raise him via telephone, find out what's keeping him? I mean, if it's something big, maybe I should be in on it, too.
Is it? Big? Did he say where he is, what he's up to? I have tried.
He must be stuck on the subway.
I rode it once and was warned that they expose themselves to women down there.
Who's "they"? You know, in Japan they took out all the seats.
So now they're all crushed up together like they're on some death camp train from the Deuce.
[door opens, closes.]
[Anne.]
Let's put Japan on the never list, then.
Oh, it is, sugar.
It is.
Oh, my God, oh, my God.
Finally.
Who's the help? [whispering.]
Axe's chef.
[whispering.]
Let's not share that with our guests.
- Oh, hello.
Forgive me.
- Oh, there he is! Very sorry.
You remember my one and only? Yes, of course.
What a pleasure.
Hello.
Where ya been? On a hot one? You know, just making the rounds, seeing that all the patients are in bed and well tended to.
- You know.
- Federal Day? Uh, you know it.
Yeah.
No.
suspenseful music I don't think that's where you were.
You wouldn't be late 'cause of that.
Really.
You're working something - It's big, isn't it? - [chuckles.]
But you don't want me to know anything about it.
You want to surprise me with a big win.
Hm? Do I have it? [laughs.]
Nailed me.
[laughter.]
[sighs.]
Shall we all to table? - Absolutely! - After you, sugar.
- Thank you.
- Please.
[Grizzly Bears' Mourning Sound playing on speakers.]
Welcome.
This is compliments of Mr.
Axelrod.
Dom Perignon P2.
Enjoy.
Well, to Genometech Atlas, and the closing on our final round this week And to the man who built it, Peyton Breen, a unicorn walking among us.
Could not have done it without you, Oscar.
Well, you could have, but how would you have paid for it? So, genomic mapping and decoding.
A home-use diagnostic kit with an app-linked database That's how we monetize.
[Breen.]
Send in a sample, map your genome, find out exactly what drugs you should be taking, for what deficiency, what disease, how much, when.
[Breen.]
It will start as a shortcut for doctors and patients, but eventually, there won't be doctors.
Only the app and the patient.
That's how we really monetize.
I never thought I'd be excited to hear someone cut the human interface out of medicine but I think I am.
Thanks.
We have so few nights together, thank you for spending one on this.
Thank you for including me in your work.
You're incredible.
dramatic music Anisman should be here any minute.
Grigor and his fucking money.
I never take it, he never pulls it.
I'm not even considering this.
[sighs.]
I feel like Rick in Casablanca, selling out to Signor Ferrari.
[elevator bell chimes.]
Hello.
Ah.
[elevator door closes.]
Bill.
Oh, Jesus.
Frotty Anisman.
I should have sniffed him out from all the Sadelle's they carted in before.
The fuck they call him Frotty? Short for 'frottage.
' As in: stay out of close quarters with him.
I'm still lost.
The practice of rubbing against another person's clothed body in a crowd for sexual gratification.
But for the record, it's pronounced frot-tahge.
- Ohhh - Ohhh Totally gross unless you're ScarJo and JoGo in Don Jon.
Then it's hot as fuck.
[Wags.]
He's here.
I'm gonna go greet.
suspenseful music [door opens.]
[door closes.]
Hey, how was NoMad? It was perfect.
Thank you so much for setting it up.
Oscar loved it.
And so did Peyton Breen Good.
Glad to hear it.
So you're really doing it, selling off a piece of Axe Capital.
Will it be worth it for the cap raise? Well, we'll see.
Oh! - Ah, shit! - [door closes.]
[grumbles.]
[sighs.]
So, you ready to go? Okay.
Okay.
All right.
I guess this is what we're doing.
It seems to be.
All right.
We're almost there, huh? Almost closed on the deal of it all.
We have a deal.
Yes, we do.
Alllllmosst.
Because I got to thinking about what I am buying.
And I realized I'm leaving the most valuable part untapped.
And what's that? Your trades.
dramatic music I can make far more money following you than I even will owning you.
You won't be owning me.
You'll be owning a small piece of my company that I can call back.
All the more, sir, all the more.
I need total transparency.
And you're gonna give it to me because you got nothing else.
Gornisht.
Bupkis.
Nul.
I can't do it I won't do it Go home.
I pass.
You need me.
You're not getting anywhere without me and my money.
Frotty, I got billions of dollars, hundreds of employees, and two kids at home who think I can fly.
What the fuck do you have? The only thing you need.
More.
All the same, get the fuck out.
Fine.
[sniffs.]
Fine.
[door opens.]
You know I love it when you move with the mystery of Yahweh, but what the fuck? I hope you have something because you just threw out the thing we had.
I might.
I just might.
[Sacker.]
We got Cutler.
Dive motel in Newark.
He bought a plane ticket from Newark to Caracas, in cash.
But he entered his TSA number when he checked in.
So we canvassed all the local hotels.
Nice work, Dancshazy.
You want us to take him in for processing? Not sure what charges you're bringing.
Even sitting on him for this long gonna be a problem unless you've got something on him You can go.
It's just a chat.
By the time we're done he won't be filing any complaints.
Sir.
Mr.
Cutler.
Sweltering in Caracas right now.
Unbearable.
Why the sudden trip in the worsted wool? I heard on the wind it'd be a good time to go.
Ahh, New York finance whiz like you, you're probably making a currency play on the Bolivar.
Oh, but that's right, you're not a New York finance whiz.
Why the New York bust out shop? I keep an address.
It's a move that's widely practiced.
suspenseful music [sighs.]
Tell me about the Jeffcoats' business and you'll be on your flight to Venezuela in no time.
Let's call the Jeffcoats.
Together.
If you're so fucking interested.
Mm.
[sighs.]
Sure, we can call them, but would they be happy to hear from you? You've been on a hell of a losing streak with their money.
Markets are tough.
Oh, a pack of monkeys throwing darts at a board would do better than you ten, twelve, fifteen million dollar losses Ten years running! The church has a longer horizon than ordinary investors Come on, we both know you're not executing any trades.
You know who that sounds like? I'll give you a hint, you'll be rooming with him at Camp Butner.
That's right, Madoff.
Because I know the church is 'investing' with you, and you're kicking it back as cash and writing it off as losses.
Now, where the fuck did Jeffcoat get all this money he put with you? I tell you, I get to leave? You're fresh out of conditions.
Jail or not? Alright The cable company.
TexasSouthCable.
Jeffcoats made their money by letting it run its lines underneath the family ranchland for monster licensing fees.
Four times market.
They kicked back a chunk of that to the cable company president, of course They got rich.
How come the money never showed up as income? Charitable donations.
- The church.
- Yep.
That was their laundry.
And they split up the cash, bought some television stations.
Parishioners donated their money.
The church feeds that to me.
I you know, with the books.
And cut the shell corp checks.
And to save yourself, you are willing to testify Jock Jeffcoat profited along with his brother? Still profits.
I know he does.
[Partner #1.]
Good thing is there's no paperwork.
The Chuck Rhoades Special.
[Partner #1.]
So which case are we filing the OT under? Nah, we gotta eat this one for Kate.
I owe you Have a good night.
You're Agent Dancshazy.
You're the new Special Counsel.
We know each other.
We've met night at the bar a while back Just want you to know: I have no beef with you.
Yeah.
Sure.
No problem.
Same team right? Right.
You.
Me.
Director Lynch.
Sacker.
Chuck Rhoades.
All of us.
All the way.
Hm.
Yeah.
suspenseful music Have you done it? N-Not yet.
I just Don't you say the word 'can't' to me.
You will.
The only question is when.
Beyond our long-short strategies and derivatives we look for options inefficiencies in convert arb situations.
We get the stability of a convert arb plus the multiplier effect of using those inefficient options.
Taylor's pitching a shut out in there.
These Kansas City yokels are lapping it up.
Between that and playing you like the great and powerful Oz, too busy for the meeting, it's working.
- Good.
- Groups like this never say yes in the room.
I'll text you when the meeting breaks.
Okay.
Hey, I'll catch you down by the elevator "I had to at least say hello" and ride down with them.
And, you know, try to ram it home.
Squirt some of that winner musk all over 'em.
I plan to.
suspenseful music - Hey folks, folks.
- Oh.
Hi, Axe.
I really wish I could've been in on that meeting with you, [Axe.]
but I couldn't let you out of here without looking you in the eye - and shaking your hand.
- [elevator bell chimes.]
Eh, you know what, I'll ride down with you.
[Barkow.]
Thanks, Bobby.
We appreciate that.
[Woman.]
Yeah, thank you.
Sure you're busy.
[Axe.]
And so, how is our fair city treating you? [whispering.]
Not now.
Not now.
Ben! You tried Carmine's yet? - Not now.
Psst.
Ben! Ben! - Not yet.
We're going tonight before Cats.
Isn't it great they brought Cats back? Absolutely [elevator doors close, echoing.]
[elevator motor whirring.]
[cellphone plays Nelly's Hot in Herre.]
Hot in Hot in So hot in herre Oh With a little bit of, uh uh And a little bit of, uh uh I was like, good gracious, ass is bodacious - Flirtatious - Ben! Trying to show faces Looking for the right time - To shoot my steam - Ben Looking for the right time to flash them keys - Ben? - I'm leaving - Please believe in - Ben! I need you to get up up on the dance floor Give that man what he asking for 'Cause I feel like busting loose And I feel like touching you I said - It's getting hot in herre - So hot So take off all your clothes I am getting so hot I wanna take my clothes off You know, when it comes to pension fund managers, these groups never give an answer in the room.
But they did this time The answer was no It was 'heck no.
' They didn't like it? Found it offensive, called us unprofessional.
So what the hell was that? suspenseful music I've been tracking rental car usage in business cities, developing relationships with managers there.
Based on lots of activity in Milwaukee, I've deduced a big move is going down Talk more.
Managers of the main airport locations have confirmed that there are lots of Dutch passports being presented for car rentals.
Holland Inter-Bev's going after Beer National.
My sources were able to confirm, by GPS, that all these cars have been going from a Courtyard Marriott seven miles to Beer National's Milwaukee headquarters.
Right.
I think there's a merger coming, if not an outright purchase And Axe Cap will have positions in both companies, ready for the ride up on the announcement.
dramatic music Well fucking done, Ben Kim.
Maybe next time, keep your shirt on Hot in Herre suspenseful music - - What the fuck?! This is where you would make some kind of reference to a gangster movie betrayal.
As in: I went to the barber and ended up on the floor like Joey Gallo.
And you were the only one who knew I was getting a haircut.
I probably would.
Yeah.
But Joey Gallo got killed at Umberto's.
It was Anastasia who got it at the barber shop.
Also: I didn't kill you.
You are standing here in my office, not bleeding out on the linoleum.
Same difference in our world.
What, exactly, did you do? suspenseful music - Breen.
- Bobby Axelrod.
Now I know I'm in New York.
It's like seeing the Empire State Building or something.
Well, I'm gonna give you the view the tourists never get.
The floor above the deck with the coin operated binocs.
Uh, what do I pay for that privilege? No, no, no, the question is: what do I pay? How do I get you to break your letter of intent with Oscar Langstraat? Bought 50 percent of Breen's company, at 200 million, which placed its paper value at 400 total.
NASDAQ have already confirmed they are ready to accept our public offering at a valuation of 2.
4 billion.
That is a billion added to the value of our balance sheets and 800 million in gains this month It basically solves our problem.
You sold out my relationship in order to do it.
No, no.
You did.
That's why you told me he was at your dinner.
Congratulations, by the way.
You've earned out on your advance and you're way into bonus already.
[Axe.]
Hey I'm sorry.
No, you're not.
[Langstraat.]
What happened? [Taylor.]
I'm sorry.
[door closes.]
I just spoke to my dad.
Mm.
I figured you would.
Was there really no other fucking way that you could've accessed that info? Perhaps.
But I couldn't think of one, and he was happy to help.
For me.
Yes.
And that's good for you.
It's like a Senator writing a letter nominating someone to the Naval Academy.
There's nothing to be embarrassed about.
I told you I need for him to avoid jeopardy.
And I need to succeed on my own.
As do I.
And yet, I have found my own father to be an endless source of help.
Especially when I'm certain that I don't need it.
I should be the one to decide that, Chuck.
Sometimes.
But you came here to work for me.
Yeah, in a business that rewards various connections and keeps track of favors and chits.
Sure, I did.
Still, it just feels, uh Kind of shitty.
Right.
And also kind of good, in a way, that my father came through.
And that you went to him.
And now I own that chit.
dramatic music Fuck.
You really might have taught me too well.
That could bite you someday.
Well, I will gladly take that chance to have you with me today.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
[band plays Russian music.]
[music stops.]
My children.
You'll notice they don't whine.
You've trained them well.
Credit these women with that my wife, my ex, my mother, but no.
The kids came out that way.
We were lucky.
Also, not American, which when it comes to whining, really fucking helps.
That it does.
But you trained yourself though.
I took from you.
You didn't make a squeal or spill a tear.
Very un-American.
Would it have worked? Only to make me never think of you again.
And somehow like the man, Teófilo Stevenson, you boxed your way out of the corner and found a way to cover your losses.
Well, what were the choices? Exactly as I'd see it.
In the end, I decided not to make the oil deal.
For you? No.
Eh, maybe a little bit.
But now I put the money back.
Along with a promise to give you a warning before I pull it again.
Best I could hope for.
I know you must've broken things people, deals, someone's hopes and dreams in order to get money back into your firm.
- [giggles.]
- [chuckles.]
But you swallow it, here, now, because this is business and life and who cares what it costs you? Indeed.
I tell you [smooches.]
you must always have a three year old in your house, to make you appreciate life And you must also have your mother close.
To keep the line unbroken.
[Grigor whispers indistinctly.]
suspenseful music There is plenty I would kill for, you know, if we're being honest.
And there's no reason not to be.
But family, Axe, I would do things for these people that you couldn't imagine.
As they have all done for me.
Especially her, my dear mama.
You're the boy.
Aren't you? In your story.
Who took the wine from the stranger? If that were true, what would you be saying about my mother? That she did what she had to do to protect her family.
And you.
And didn't complain.
I am fortunate to have her.
You are a fortunate man, Grigor.
We are both so.
And fortunate to have met when we did.
[Dramarama's I Wish I Was Your Mother .]
I scream at you for sharing And I curse you just for caring I hate the clothes you're wearing They're so pretty And I tell you not to see me And I tell you not to feel me [knock on door.]
And I make your life a drag Robert.
Hi Mom.
Oh, I wish I was your mother I wish I'd been your father And then I would have seen you Would have been you as a child Played houses with your sisters And wrestled all your brothers And then who knows I might have felt a family For a while We either get to the other side and line dance on Jock's grave, or he will dance on ours.
I did more than just run your money, I kept us alive.
If you stop performing, you will be replaced.
There are men undermining our sacred purpose.
I want a hard target search of every online footprint.
I'm just not sure it's strictly legal.
We can do it.
Most people pick their spots.
Well, I pick every spot.
And a win isn't a win unless it's a kill.
(Clink)
Previously on Billions We're doing a massive cap raise.
And quickly.
First money post-indictment precludes institutional investors.
We need the icebreaker now.
[Axe.]
We need Grigor Andolov.
[Grigor.]
There was this little boy.
And I take his mother away from the square.
Behind the soldiers.
After, I leave her for the soldiers.
This little boy, do you know what happened to him? No.
No one ever knows.
Bryan Connerty, meet the head of the New York office.
Assistant Director Frances Lynch.
Hi.
- You cool here, Kate? - Yes.
I am.
Unless you're going to swing on me like some Irish punk? They say you can't ride two horses with one behind, but in today's business world, it's a smart move, Still pretty sharp for an old dog.
When we spoke this morning, you were in California.
[Taylor.]
You came to help me with the algorithm? [Langstraat.]
To keep you company.
[Axe.]
You are now officially but unofficially the proud owner of half of my half of Panay's fund, You decide what's right and what's wrong.
With no one to appease.
You're forgetting Jock Jeffcoat.
[Chuck.]
His thumb pressing down on me I don't like it.
[Wendy.]
It's not enough to resist [Wendy.]
or not resist Jock anymore.
You have to assassinate this motherfucker.
dramatic music dramatic music [tires screech in distance.]
dramatic music [car door closes.]
They call it the wood, isn't that right, Mr.
Kornbluth? That they do.
The front page.
Even though almost no one reads it on paper anymore.
Oh, they'll bring back the bulldog edition for this one.
Carrie Caminetti Buffalo mayoral candidate? Buffalo bunko man.
Pay to play.
Corruption.
Bribery.
It's all in there and, though we're indicting, you didn't get it from me.
What do you want in return? Everything you have every innuendo, allegation, intimation that you couldn't substantiate, that you've been too scared to run, that your editor has killed On? Jock Jeffcoat.
You're going after your boss? Or am I protecting him? By finding out what's floating around on him.
You'd be pacing the perimeter with only a walkie and pistol.
He's already well insulated behind the moat and drawbridge.
Texas style.
The thing is: he's a rich man.
Everyone knows that.
What's he worth, ten, fifteen mill? No, Chuck.
Whispers are: twenty times that.
Has PR folks whose sole job is to keep him out of the financial press.
Even when he was governor.
There always have been rumors as to the way he earned it.
Many center around his brother.
The televangelist.
Right, and the ownership of the networks he broadcasts on.
Wow.
All that hidden money.
Amazing.
Most folks these days want everyone to think they're richer than they are.
Unless they don't want questions about how they got it.
I've received a tip that I'm honor bound to pursue.
On Jock Jeffcoat.
Mm.
Sweet Mary the Mother Blessed.
And Joseph the Carpenter too.
[chuckles.]
I'd like your help to investigate.
Need it.
[chuckles lightly.]
But this is dangerous.
For both of you.
So I want to give you the chance to bail, right now, at no cost to you.
suspenseful music Good.
Noted and appreciated.
Now Jock's brother is a Billy Graham revivalist type [Allerd.]
Yes.
During the Attorney General vetting process, they went deep on him, I remember Oh, me too.
Instead of a tent, he has a mega-church.
They broadcast to a loose network of cable TV stations nationwide.
Which may be the open flank.
As the story is: the brother owns those stations.
And that never came out publicly.
Even during the vet.
They must've planned for that years ahead.
So they must have a reason for wanting to hide it.
We'll dive into that.
People inside the organization are likely to be loyal.
So find some who left.
Accountants.
Lawyers.
The New York Jews he'd hire who got tired of the Texas Two-Step and quit.
Maybe there's some rancor.
I'll spread some rootie-tooties around, make something happen.
Okay.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
Ask the question.
Well, I couldn't help but think of a person who knows a thing or two about media deals.
Mm.
I'm going to have to insist that we leave my father out of this.
I can't have his name written down and talked about.
I cannot have him becoming a target for Jock.
Of course.
I won't ask you to go to him.
Thank you.
[tennis ball hits racquet.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
[grunts.]
- [grunts.]
- Ohh! [speaking Russian.]
[speaking Russian.]
She says you have a real forehand.
Do a thing, do it well.
Your mother teach you that? The opposite, maybe.
Thanks for setting this up.
Listen, Axe, I'm pulling capital.
suspenseful music All of it? 1.
5 billion.
Oh, that's almost half the investment.
I got a good opportunity.
Good for you.
A Russian oil venture.
What you would call a "mortal lock.
" Your money just landed.
I put it in, I take it out.
I shake it all about.
You know I normally have a quarterly gate for people with new money.
But as a courtesy to you I let you come in without that restriction.
And I appreciate the courtesy.
Now I must take advantage.
[speaking Russian.]
[speaking Russian.]
What'd he say? To let you win next time.
I told him that's never gonna happen.
You're way too smart to believe that anyway.
You got that right.
[zipper opens.]
Thanks.
It was awesome.
Wags, rally the team.
We need to step up the timeline on the raise.
[door opens.]
The AG is here.
When you say "here"? [Donna.]
Mr.
Jeffcoat is in the library.
General! Had I known, I'd've organized a marching band.
In no mood to be serenaded.
On my way in from the airport I couldn't help but notice what a shithole some areas are.
Yes, well, there's underprivileged people living out there in low-income Shitholes, Chuck.
Gave me an idea.
Well, it was Giuliani's brainstorm first, back in the golden era of Reagan.
But I'm gonna bring it back like bell bottoms.
We are.
Federal Day.
I don't think a Federal Day is really going to change very much It will for a spell.
That's more than you've done.
You and your counterparts are going to grab up every city and state drug case tomorrow and make them our cases.
We are going to prosecute.
And hard.
You want to deploy federal resources in prosecuting dime bag amounts in housing projects and the like? It is my fondest wish.
- [laughs.]
- [chuckles.]
Ooh, by the by, um I have the missus in tow with me on this trip.
And, uh, she's mentioned how she's grown tired of restaurant eating on the road.
Oh.
We both have [chuckling.]
Oh, well, why are you eating in restaurants, when Wendy and I live here?! - Oh, Chuck - No, no, you'll, uh you'll come for dinner.
What a neighborly offer.
We gladly accept.
Good.
Great.
Well, all right.
Great.
Okay.
Very good.
Okay, we need to move quickly on the cap raise.
The Sex Wax is going on the surfboard as we speak.
Getting into the spirit of talking to the primes [Taylor.]
I mean to say: we are well positioned.
I've been backchanneling with them, and landing that Grigor money lubricates as you said it would it's telling the story that we are back.
- Danger, Will Robinson! - The fuck, Spyros? I couldn't stop him, he said it was DEFCON six urgent.
The DEFCON scale only goes to five Exactly.
- And one is the most severe.
- Whatever.
We just had 1.
5 big ones pulled out of the firm.
- Oh, shit - Yeah.
That can only be one person It's Grigor Andolov.
And just so you know for the future: you don't have walk-in privileges.
Sugarpova? High end! Yumster! [bags crinkle.]
You knew? You were going to have us lie in the raise meetings.
I thought I had a few more days until the redemption, which meant all the meetings we had wouldn't have been lies.
The Street will see the drop in assets under management and read it as one of two things: redemptions or loss.
Either way fucks the cap raise.
Yeah, so.
We lever up big, and quick.
Leverage on that scale would have to flow from the institutions.
The Street will know we're fucked.
Well, you have an alternative? I do.
Frotty Anisman.
- Gross.
- Who? Liquid as hell.
He works outside the main of the business.
[Wags.]
He's a middle man for big money [Wags.]
Middle Eastern money, South American money, dictators, anyone who's got it.
Sounds somewhat ideal.
You don't know him.
That is an unpalatable idea, Wags.
Does that mean it's a no? It's an unpalatable idea Taylor, scour the floor for any quick plays to make up the shortfall.
Obscure the reason, but make it clear the timeframe is now.
Say it.
Carly.
Victor.
Panay.
All the satellite funds.
Bring them onboard.
Now, that's a fucking good idea But the one thing more important than giving oxygen to the fire of Axe Cap is keeping my escape hatches open in case those pricks from the government ever come after me again.
So, maybe, Raul.
Time to call the cops.
Bring his fund back to the mothership.
dramatic music Raul, I got a treat for you tonight.
This is the ramen that blew Osakisan's mind in Tokyo.
- [chuckles.]
- Enjoy.
Thanks, Ivan.
This is for you.
It's your piece of Panay.
The PIN is the date you came to Axe Cap.
Prosperous day for us both.
As they shall continue to be.
More so once you've come back.
Shit.
Come on, we've had some quiet success with Panay.
With your hand on the wheel, sure, but my board of directors likes quiet.
Your board likes Devin Hester returns and I'm the only one who can take their money a hundred and nine yards to the promised land.
You're doing that.
Through Panay.
Still too soon.
Okay, if you're not gonna come back yourself, go to work for me.
Firefighters pension fund, Sanitation workers fund, Corrections officers convince 'em to come onboard Axe Cap.
Come on, feed me some red meat, man.
You'll get a cut.
You putting me out on the street like I used to with my runny nosed junkie CIs.
Yeah, that drive in your pocket's gonna give you a lot more motivation than the crumpled twenties and the methadone tabs you used to give them.
I'll make some calls.
And I won't ask why you're so desperate for this immediate cash infusion suspenseful music [Franklin Sacker.]
I almost didn't take this meeting.
Because Kate would have called me, told me the agenda if it were something on the actual agenda.
So you both need something from me but you're here alone.
You didn't want her compromised by asking.
[glasses clink.]
Well, uh there's a reason you're where you are in life, Franklin.
- There are many.
- Mm.
Luck prominent among them.
Mm.
[chuckles.]
And, yes, certain tools, skills, abilities.
How can I use those to benefit you today? Good.
Let's go right at it.
Yes.
I'm trying to understand how a particular set of deals would have been made several years back.
Local television station deals.
In Texas.
By powerful government officials.
Dangerous ground for anyone to look at these days.
More so for you.
Kind of man would I be if I let that danger stop me? Are you particularly focused on deals that revolve around a religious center and its ability to broadcast its message widely? I am.
I should be.
Right? Follow me closely here.
I can't engage.
Can't talk specifically about it.
I have a duty to my board and shareholders not to get the company on the shit list of the most powerful lawman in the country and I must hew to that.
suspenseful music Let's speak more broadly, then.
Philosophically Not going to sit here and run you through how land deals Whose land? Exactly.
How those deals were struck a decade ago to allow wires to run across half the state.
How land leases, conservation areas and water rights might have been eminent domained and such.
And what that might have cost who.
And who might have benefited.
I'd never ask you to give me that kind of info, for the record.
No, that'd be helping me.
Which you are not.
The last time I was in Texas, Jock was still governor.
And had oversight over the entire state.
You know that.
What you don't know is the ways in which he wielded that influence.
We all, every one of us in the media landscape, had to kiss his ring.
After that, I thought: been there, done that.
And stayed away.
Never thinking he'd end up in a place where he could do more damage.
Unless someone, somehow stopped him.
You're white-knuckling your necktie.
- What is it? - [Chuck.]
[sighs.]
Um we're having dinner with the Attorney General and his wife.
Tonight.
Oh.
Where are we going? Well, they've, uh they've, uh, tired of restaurant eating.
[chuckles.]
Restaurant eating? [Chuck.]
[scoffs.]
That's like being tired of air flying.
What other kind is there? [smacks lips.]
I'm really supposed to cook for these people? [sighs.]
Do we know anything about Mrs.
Jeffcoat? Uh goes by Anne.
Actually, that's her name.
Probably goes by Mother.
[sighs.]
So we're doing this? Fuck.
We're doing this.
[sighs.]
Well, I'm not putting on an apron.
That's not a story they're leaving with.
What then? [keyboard clacking.]
A quick thing? - Sure.
- [beep.]
[Helena.]
Spartan-Ives for you.
[Barkow.]
Axe, I've got Kansas City in town.
[Barkow.]
The Heavy Construction Laborers Union fund.
They heard you got your icebreaker.
They're coming to you for a meeting.
Starting investment is 500 million.
Well, we'll see about upping that number.
Send them in.
Just a warning: they're straitlaced.
I'm taking them to Cats, not The Box.
Okay.
So we'll give them milk with their Michter's.
[button clicks.]
And when we're sitting at the table with 'em, you sell them the car with the Tru-Coat sealant you hear? Go Bears! You came in for something.
A minor key personal thing.
Can you arrange NoMad for me and some out of town guests? Sure.
Oscar isn't wired in New York? He is, but I want to deliver this for him as a present.
It's a business thing, a little celebration.
Okay.
I'll call Will Guidara now.
[door opens.]
[Allerd.]
You really are starting a war.
Like Costner did in Wolves.
Riding right up to the enemy line, letting 'em take their shots at you, almost daring them to kill you.
Like him, I am the walking wounded already.
Might as well go out Bon Jovi style.
Blaze of Glory, huh? You've worked for me a long while, Kate, you've studied hard.
Good one.
So we can't talk you out of this one? No.
But we can be more careful than Mr.
Costner was.
So as not to tip off Main Justice until the case is built.
Not easy.
We refer to this defendant as "Anonymous" so we don't have to notify the Inspector General and do a Special Grand Jury, which would blow this whole thing up.
We have to build this one alone.
And yeah.
That ain't gonna be easy.
But, hey, if we wanted to be in the "easy" business, we'd have gone to med school.
I really have taught you well.
So the guy you need to see is Ashley Cutler.
He's a principal at Cutler Wealth Management.
It's that New York City hedge fund that manages the financial assets of Jock's brother's megachurch.
Why don't I go over there? Because Cutler Wealth Management is a front.
suspenseful music [Sacker.]
It's a broom closet in Midtown.
What's behind it? We don't know yet.
But we drilled down and found his residence.
Expensive property outside of Newburgh.
His EZ Pass and his phone have him at the house.
You can't take your government car.
Rental, in my name, in the garage.
Good.
I should get on the road, I have a dinner I really can't miss.
I thought we were making progress.
When I'd heard you'd stood up to Dollar Bill.
Me too! But it didn't last.
I think the snap back made me even more timid, somehow.
What happened today? You know we're looking for short term cash generators.
[Ben Kim.]
I have one.
[both urinating.]
I'd like to talk, um, to you later.
I have, maybe, I might have an idea to generate alpha, quickly.
Go! [urinating continues.]
Here? This is where it all happens.
Let fly.
Now.
I've - [slosh.]
- uh been tracking rental car companies for years.
[Taylor.]
Is this an automotive play? [Taylor.]
Because we're well covered in that space.
- [toilet flushes.]
- It isn't.
But there's a kernel of an idea that's grown - And? - [stall door closes.]
[Ben Kim.]
But I couldn't pitch it.
And then, I couldn't even go Go? It's hard to concentrate with all of you watching right now.
[Ben Kim.]
Pee.
I had pee fright.
Come on.
Let's walk.
We do assessments of everyone who works here.
To see who might be a candidate for one of these offices.
The C-suite offices? That's right.
Most of the time it just confirms that most folks are exactly where they should be.
They've topped out.
Or worse, are going to bottom out.
Is that what mine says? Would I have brought you up here if you were bottoming out? No? Well, actually, I might.
If I thought you needed a jolt.
But this is not that.
This is: right now, at this moment, if you want to finally live the fuck up to your potential instead of spiraling, you must find a way to shift the paradigm.
That could be your office, or that.
CIO, picking the strategies.
COO, managing the risk.
Eh Maybe even Owner? Yes, instead of being down there, with them.
But that's where I'm comfortable.
No.
It's where you've made yourself fit.
Because you're so bound up in being the smallest, most helpful, unobtrusive version of yourself.
Just like your mother shits on your head for.
Now, what you need to do to prove her wrong, and prove it to yourself, is something totally out of character, big and bold.
Something public, that terrifies you, in order to free yourself.
Like recite a sonnet to a crowd.
Invite the office to see you skydive.
Become a Toastmaster.
Something totally out of character.
You have to break through the confidence barrier, because then you'll break through the C-suite barrier, too.
dramatic music [elevator bell chimes.]
Sorry man, firefighters won't touch you.
They sprint into burning buildings but they're afraid of us? It's not fear, Wags, they're still pissed about 9/11.
A little bit.
What about Sanitation? Too many retired firefighters in that union.
It's a no-go.
If it's one thing I know about you it's that that wasn't your only idea.
You'll move on to the next one and make it work.
Not sure the next one's fully formed.
That's because you keep looking backwards to the kind of people who used to invest with you.
Instead of forward to the sort of folks you can get now.
You have to change.
That's what I learned on the job.
Six percent of the class gets promoted to lieutenant.
Other guys, they got a choice.
They either accept that they were left behind.
Or they claw themselves forward taking shit assignments no one else is willing to take.
Hope to edge up from there.
suspenseful music [shakes hands.]
[shakes hands.]
[elevator door chimes.]
Alright.
Let's book that unpalatable meeting on City Island.
[birds chirping.]
[doorbell rings.]
[door opens.]
Hello.
I'm here to see Mr.
Cutler.
I'm sorry, sir, Mr.
Cutler's not here.
Really? 'Cause I have information that says he is.
He packed some things.
He's gone.
Look, uh I am the United States Attorney for the Southern District of New York.
It's an official matter.
You can check suspenseful music Cutler's on the lam or he went to the AG.
Either way, he didn't want to be tracked.
Uh impossible.
He couldn't have known you were coming.
Have you two been making your calls on government landlines? Encrypted wireless.
Good.
We have to find him.
Sacker, you got FBI you can trust? Yeah, I got a guy I can ask.
He's solid.
Do it.
[door handle clicks.]
Let's make this quick.
Gotta get back for Gordie's birthday.
Mmm.
Mm-hmm.
[slurping.]
Mmm.
Hey, listen, I could do about six more of these.
I'll bet.
You want? No? Oh! Ah, shit! [grumbles.]
Alright.
Look, Axey, you're sitting with me.
So I know you must be desperate as a fraternity pledge who can't find a date for the screw-your-brother dance.
Yeah, well, there's a window into your youth I could've done without right now.
[chuckles.]
No.
But what you must need is capital.
I'll provide it.
I'll move in my Jordanian investors, as a purchase of twenty percent of your fund, passively, no controls at all on investment, management, risk, anything like that.
So what do you want, apart from the payout that you get year to year? There are men who would be too proud to tell you.
You're not one of them.
I want you to slap my name on the ass end of yours, so it's Axe/Anisman Capital.
There'll be no ass slapping of any kind, Frotty.
It's Axe Cap.
And it will stay that way until they drop me in a hole and toss the dirt in.
Fine.
Alright.
Forget the name.
But, uh I need your glow.
I want you to hug me in public.
Come to my conference in Tulsa, tell folks I am a wise counselor whose words have great weight for you.
You think standing next to our boy will make that mirepoix of psoriasis, dandruff, and irritable bowel syndrome disappear? I don't have IBS.
Technically.
And yes I do think so.
Because while he's surfed above it all, I've been treated like Eddie Mush with a pocketbook.
Mm? If you want my Jordanian money, you got to cuddle up.
[chair clacks.]
[sighs.]
I'll agree.
With one condition: If I want to buy you out in a year give you your money back with a profit you have to let me.
I need that freedom.
[scoffs.]
Well, that's why you couldn't make this deal with an institution.
No one would ever agree to that.
Fine.
At a forty percent premium.
[sighs.]
Okay, Frotty.
We'll sign the deal at Axe Cap tomorrow.
I can't wait to fucking announce this! Hey.
Alright.
You guys want one of these, huh? They're Wellfleet's.
They're plump and briny, like my dream dates.
[chuckles.]
Hmm? No? Hey.
Alright.
[indistinct conversations.]
Hey boys [sports announcer talking indistinctly.]
Hi, Dad.
Nice you showed up for your own kid's party.
An hour late.
Well, looks like everybody's got right into the spirit of it without me.
Should we have waited to get started? Wow, you open any door in this fucking city, the dregs blow right in.
Well, this is my apartment.
So can't keep me out.
Enjoying that? Hells to the yeah.
[Bruno.]
Pizza's ready in five minutes! [wood clacking, sliding.]
Bruno Sorry to encroach.
[oven door closes.]
I had a feeling I'd see ya, but Gordie likes the pies.
[chuckling.]
Well Look, whatever went down between us, I'd do anything for your kids.
Oh, fuck I never meant for business to get between us.
Eh I should've never brought it to you in the first place.
Friendship should stay clean.
Cent'ann'.
To your beautiful family.
Alright.
Let me ask you something.
When you started out way back, everybody else in the neighborhood, they took juiced up money, Shylock money, mob money.
So how did you stay away from it all these years? Ahh, kid, the kind of money those guys give you, I mean, it's not like the points on a regular loan.
You end up renting out a hundred percent of your own ass.
- [chuckles.]
- Huh? No seed money is worth that suspenseful music So I scraped it together myself.
Right.
And I had my family looking at me like I was a hero, a good man.
I never wanted to lose that.
[chuckles.]
You kid Alright, come on! I got pizza! Hot and ready.
Come on! - Hell yeah! - I got a Margherita.
[Bruno.]
I got a clam with bacon.
[Bruno.]
I got a pepperoni coming up You grind up about four pounds of fresh meat.
Anything's acceptable rabbit, possum, unidentified.
Stay away from skunk, though, since its odiferousness tends to have a negative effect on the final result.
And that's Texas Roadkill Chili? It is indeed.
Smells a little bit like this tuna.
Hm.
[sighs.]
Your cook seems good.
Mm.
Where's Chuck? [inhales sharply.]
[thud, tires screech.]
Fuck.
[thumping.]
[tire flapping.]
[gearshift clicks.]
Oh, motherfucker.
[sighs.]
No service.
Oh, motherfucker.
MOTHERFUCKER.
[jack rattling.]
[sighs.]
[groans.]
Where he's gonna run Tell me where he roams Could you perchance raise him via telephone, find out what's keeping him? I mean, if it's something big, maybe I should be in on it, too.
Is it? Big? Did he say where he is, what he's up to? I have tried.
He must be stuck on the subway.
I rode it once and was warned that they expose themselves to women down there.
Who's "they"? You know, in Japan they took out all the seats.
So now they're all crushed up together like they're on some death camp train from the Deuce.
[door opens, closes.]
[Anne.]
Let's put Japan on the never list, then.
Oh, it is, sugar.
It is.
Oh, my God, oh, my God.
Finally.
Who's the help? [whispering.]
Axe's chef.
[whispering.]
Let's not share that with our guests.
- Oh, hello.
Forgive me.
- Oh, there he is! Very sorry.
You remember my one and only? Yes, of course.
What a pleasure.
Hello.
Where ya been? On a hot one? You know, just making the rounds, seeing that all the patients are in bed and well tended to.
- You know.
- Federal Day? Uh, you know it.
Yeah.
No.
suspenseful music I don't think that's where you were.
You wouldn't be late 'cause of that.
Really.
You're working something - It's big, isn't it? - [chuckles.]
But you don't want me to know anything about it.
You want to surprise me with a big win.
Hm? Do I have it? [laughs.]
Nailed me.
[laughter.]
[sighs.]
Shall we all to table? - Absolutely! - After you, sugar.
- Thank you.
- Please.
[Grizzly Bears' Mourning Sound playing on speakers.]
Welcome.
This is compliments of Mr.
Axelrod.
Dom Perignon P2.
Enjoy.
Well, to Genometech Atlas, and the closing on our final round this week And to the man who built it, Peyton Breen, a unicorn walking among us.
Could not have done it without you, Oscar.
Well, you could have, but how would you have paid for it? So, genomic mapping and decoding.
A home-use diagnostic kit with an app-linked database That's how we monetize.
[Breen.]
Send in a sample, map your genome, find out exactly what drugs you should be taking, for what deficiency, what disease, how much, when.
[Breen.]
It will start as a shortcut for doctors and patients, but eventually, there won't be doctors.
Only the app and the patient.
That's how we really monetize.
I never thought I'd be excited to hear someone cut the human interface out of medicine but I think I am.
Thanks.
We have so few nights together, thank you for spending one on this.
Thank you for including me in your work.
You're incredible.
dramatic music Anisman should be here any minute.
Grigor and his fucking money.
I never take it, he never pulls it.
I'm not even considering this.
[sighs.]
I feel like Rick in Casablanca, selling out to Signor Ferrari.
[elevator bell chimes.]
Hello.
Ah.
[elevator door closes.]
Bill.
Oh, Jesus.
Frotty Anisman.
I should have sniffed him out from all the Sadelle's they carted in before.
The fuck they call him Frotty? Short for 'frottage.
' As in: stay out of close quarters with him.
I'm still lost.
The practice of rubbing against another person's clothed body in a crowd for sexual gratification.
But for the record, it's pronounced frot-tahge.
- Ohhh - Ohhh Totally gross unless you're ScarJo and JoGo in Don Jon.
Then it's hot as fuck.
[Wags.]
He's here.
I'm gonna go greet.
suspenseful music [door opens.]
[door closes.]
Hey, how was NoMad? It was perfect.
Thank you so much for setting it up.
Oscar loved it.
And so did Peyton Breen Good.
Glad to hear it.
So you're really doing it, selling off a piece of Axe Capital.
Will it be worth it for the cap raise? Well, we'll see.
Oh! - Ah, shit! - [door closes.]
[grumbles.]
[sighs.]
So, you ready to go? Okay.
Okay.
All right.
I guess this is what we're doing.
It seems to be.
All right.
We're almost there, huh? Almost closed on the deal of it all.
We have a deal.
Yes, we do.
Alllllmosst.
Because I got to thinking about what I am buying.
And I realized I'm leaving the most valuable part untapped.
And what's that? Your trades.
dramatic music I can make far more money following you than I even will owning you.
You won't be owning me.
You'll be owning a small piece of my company that I can call back.
All the more, sir, all the more.
I need total transparency.
And you're gonna give it to me because you got nothing else.
Gornisht.
Bupkis.
Nul.
I can't do it I won't do it Go home.
I pass.
You need me.
You're not getting anywhere without me and my money.
Frotty, I got billions of dollars, hundreds of employees, and two kids at home who think I can fly.
What the fuck do you have? The only thing you need.
More.
All the same, get the fuck out.
Fine.
[sniffs.]
Fine.
[door opens.]
You know I love it when you move with the mystery of Yahweh, but what the fuck? I hope you have something because you just threw out the thing we had.
I might.
I just might.
[Sacker.]
We got Cutler.
Dive motel in Newark.
He bought a plane ticket from Newark to Caracas, in cash.
But he entered his TSA number when he checked in.
So we canvassed all the local hotels.
Nice work, Dancshazy.
You want us to take him in for processing? Not sure what charges you're bringing.
Even sitting on him for this long gonna be a problem unless you've got something on him You can go.
It's just a chat.
By the time we're done he won't be filing any complaints.
Sir.
Mr.
Cutler.
Sweltering in Caracas right now.
Unbearable.
Why the sudden trip in the worsted wool? I heard on the wind it'd be a good time to go.
Ahh, New York finance whiz like you, you're probably making a currency play on the Bolivar.
Oh, but that's right, you're not a New York finance whiz.
Why the New York bust out shop? I keep an address.
It's a move that's widely practiced.
suspenseful music [sighs.]
Tell me about the Jeffcoats' business and you'll be on your flight to Venezuela in no time.
Let's call the Jeffcoats.
Together.
If you're so fucking interested.
Mm.
[sighs.]
Sure, we can call them, but would they be happy to hear from you? You've been on a hell of a losing streak with their money.
Markets are tough.
Oh, a pack of monkeys throwing darts at a board would do better than you ten, twelve, fifteen million dollar losses Ten years running! The church has a longer horizon than ordinary investors Come on, we both know you're not executing any trades.
You know who that sounds like? I'll give you a hint, you'll be rooming with him at Camp Butner.
That's right, Madoff.
Because I know the church is 'investing' with you, and you're kicking it back as cash and writing it off as losses.
Now, where the fuck did Jeffcoat get all this money he put with you? I tell you, I get to leave? You're fresh out of conditions.
Jail or not? Alright The cable company.
TexasSouthCable.
Jeffcoats made their money by letting it run its lines underneath the family ranchland for monster licensing fees.
Four times market.
They kicked back a chunk of that to the cable company president, of course They got rich.
How come the money never showed up as income? Charitable donations.
- The church.
- Yep.
That was their laundry.
And they split up the cash, bought some television stations.
Parishioners donated their money.
The church feeds that to me.
I you know, with the books.
And cut the shell corp checks.
And to save yourself, you are willing to testify Jock Jeffcoat profited along with his brother? Still profits.
I know he does.
[Partner #1.]
Good thing is there's no paperwork.
The Chuck Rhoades Special.
[Partner #1.]
So which case are we filing the OT under? Nah, we gotta eat this one for Kate.
I owe you Have a good night.
You're Agent Dancshazy.
You're the new Special Counsel.
We know each other.
We've met night at the bar a while back Just want you to know: I have no beef with you.
Yeah.
Sure.
No problem.
Same team right? Right.
You.
Me.
Director Lynch.
Sacker.
Chuck Rhoades.
All of us.
All the way.
Hm.
Yeah.
suspenseful music Have you done it? N-Not yet.
I just Don't you say the word 'can't' to me.
You will.
The only question is when.
Beyond our long-short strategies and derivatives we look for options inefficiencies in convert arb situations.
We get the stability of a convert arb plus the multiplier effect of using those inefficient options.
Taylor's pitching a shut out in there.
These Kansas City yokels are lapping it up.
Between that and playing you like the great and powerful Oz, too busy for the meeting, it's working.
- Good.
- Groups like this never say yes in the room.
I'll text you when the meeting breaks.
Okay.
Hey, I'll catch you down by the elevator "I had to at least say hello" and ride down with them.
And, you know, try to ram it home.
Squirt some of that winner musk all over 'em.
I plan to.
suspenseful music - Hey folks, folks.
- Oh.
Hi, Axe.
I really wish I could've been in on that meeting with you, [Axe.]
but I couldn't let you out of here without looking you in the eye - and shaking your hand.
- [elevator bell chimes.]
Eh, you know what, I'll ride down with you.
[Barkow.]
Thanks, Bobby.
We appreciate that.
[Woman.]
Yeah, thank you.
Sure you're busy.
[Axe.]
And so, how is our fair city treating you? [whispering.]
Not now.
Not now.
Ben! You tried Carmine's yet? - Not now.
Psst.
Ben! Ben! - Not yet.
We're going tonight before Cats.
Isn't it great they brought Cats back? Absolutely [elevator doors close, echoing.]
[elevator motor whirring.]
[cellphone plays Nelly's Hot in Herre.]
Hot in Hot in So hot in herre Oh With a little bit of, uh uh And a little bit of, uh uh I was like, good gracious, ass is bodacious - Flirtatious - Ben! Trying to show faces Looking for the right time - To shoot my steam - Ben Looking for the right time to flash them keys - Ben? - I'm leaving - Please believe in - Ben! I need you to get up up on the dance floor Give that man what he asking for 'Cause I feel like busting loose And I feel like touching you I said - It's getting hot in herre - So hot So take off all your clothes I am getting so hot I wanna take my clothes off You know, when it comes to pension fund managers, these groups never give an answer in the room.
But they did this time The answer was no It was 'heck no.
' They didn't like it? Found it offensive, called us unprofessional.
So what the hell was that? suspenseful music I've been tracking rental car usage in business cities, developing relationships with managers there.
Based on lots of activity in Milwaukee, I've deduced a big move is going down Talk more.
Managers of the main airport locations have confirmed that there are lots of Dutch passports being presented for car rentals.
Holland Inter-Bev's going after Beer National.
My sources were able to confirm, by GPS, that all these cars have been going from a Courtyard Marriott seven miles to Beer National's Milwaukee headquarters.
Right.
I think there's a merger coming, if not an outright purchase And Axe Cap will have positions in both companies, ready for the ride up on the announcement.
dramatic music Well fucking done, Ben Kim.
Maybe next time, keep your shirt on Hot in Herre suspenseful music - - What the fuck?! This is where you would make some kind of reference to a gangster movie betrayal.
As in: I went to the barber and ended up on the floor like Joey Gallo.
And you were the only one who knew I was getting a haircut.
I probably would.
Yeah.
But Joey Gallo got killed at Umberto's.
It was Anastasia who got it at the barber shop.
Also: I didn't kill you.
You are standing here in my office, not bleeding out on the linoleum.
Same difference in our world.
What, exactly, did you do? suspenseful music - Breen.
- Bobby Axelrod.
Now I know I'm in New York.
It's like seeing the Empire State Building or something.
Well, I'm gonna give you the view the tourists never get.
The floor above the deck with the coin operated binocs.
Uh, what do I pay for that privilege? No, no, no, the question is: what do I pay? How do I get you to break your letter of intent with Oscar Langstraat? Bought 50 percent of Breen's company, at 200 million, which placed its paper value at 400 total.
NASDAQ have already confirmed they are ready to accept our public offering at a valuation of 2.
4 billion.
That is a billion added to the value of our balance sheets and 800 million in gains this month It basically solves our problem.
You sold out my relationship in order to do it.
No, no.
You did.
That's why you told me he was at your dinner.
Congratulations, by the way.
You've earned out on your advance and you're way into bonus already.
[Axe.]
Hey I'm sorry.
No, you're not.
[Langstraat.]
What happened? [Taylor.]
I'm sorry.
[door closes.]
I just spoke to my dad.
Mm.
I figured you would.
Was there really no other fucking way that you could've accessed that info? Perhaps.
But I couldn't think of one, and he was happy to help.
For me.
Yes.
And that's good for you.
It's like a Senator writing a letter nominating someone to the Naval Academy.
There's nothing to be embarrassed about.
I told you I need for him to avoid jeopardy.
And I need to succeed on my own.
As do I.
And yet, I have found my own father to be an endless source of help.
Especially when I'm certain that I don't need it.
I should be the one to decide that, Chuck.
Sometimes.
But you came here to work for me.
Yeah, in a business that rewards various connections and keeps track of favors and chits.
Sure, I did.
Still, it just feels, uh Kind of shitty.
Right.
And also kind of good, in a way, that my father came through.
And that you went to him.
And now I own that chit.
dramatic music Fuck.
You really might have taught me too well.
That could bite you someday.
Well, I will gladly take that chance to have you with me today.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
[band plays Russian music.]
[music stops.]
My children.
You'll notice they don't whine.
You've trained them well.
Credit these women with that my wife, my ex, my mother, but no.
The kids came out that way.
We were lucky.
Also, not American, which when it comes to whining, really fucking helps.
That it does.
But you trained yourself though.
I took from you.
You didn't make a squeal or spill a tear.
Very un-American.
Would it have worked? Only to make me never think of you again.
And somehow like the man, Teófilo Stevenson, you boxed your way out of the corner and found a way to cover your losses.
Well, what were the choices? Exactly as I'd see it.
In the end, I decided not to make the oil deal.
For you? No.
Eh, maybe a little bit.
But now I put the money back.
Along with a promise to give you a warning before I pull it again.
Best I could hope for.
I know you must've broken things people, deals, someone's hopes and dreams in order to get money back into your firm.
- [giggles.]
- [chuckles.]
But you swallow it, here, now, because this is business and life and who cares what it costs you? Indeed.
I tell you [smooches.]
you must always have a three year old in your house, to make you appreciate life And you must also have your mother close.
To keep the line unbroken.
[Grigor whispers indistinctly.]
suspenseful music There is plenty I would kill for, you know, if we're being honest.
And there's no reason not to be.
But family, Axe, I would do things for these people that you couldn't imagine.
As they have all done for me.
Especially her, my dear mama.
You're the boy.
Aren't you? In your story.
Who took the wine from the stranger? If that were true, what would you be saying about my mother? That she did what she had to do to protect her family.
And you.
And didn't complain.
I am fortunate to have her.
You are a fortunate man, Grigor.
We are both so.
And fortunate to have met when we did.
[Dramarama's I Wish I Was Your Mother .]
I scream at you for sharing And I curse you just for caring I hate the clothes you're wearing They're so pretty And I tell you not to see me And I tell you not to feel me [knock on door.]
And I make your life a drag Robert.
Hi Mom.
Oh, I wish I was your mother I wish I'd been your father And then I would have seen you Would have been you as a child Played houses with your sisters And wrestled all your brothers And then who knows I might have felt a family For a while We either get to the other side and line dance on Jock's grave, or he will dance on ours.
I did more than just run your money, I kept us alive.
If you stop performing, you will be replaced.
There are men undermining our sacred purpose.
I want a hard target search of every online footprint.
I'm just not sure it's strictly legal.
We can do it.
Most people pick their spots.
Well, I pick every spot.
And a win isn't a win unless it's a kill.
(Clink)