Dawn of the Croods (2015) s03e10 Episode Script

1 Bom-bom, bom-ba-dum Ma-ma-ma-bom-ba-dum Ba-da-dum [music playing.]
Uh, Teacher Squawk, we finished our group project.
Do we pass? [gasping.]
I shall call you Meatcher Squawk.
You gorgeous meat man, you.
Teacher, can we eat Meat Teacher now? [growls.]
Students, building this statue wasn't just a well-deserved tribute to me.
It was also a lesson in teamwork, which all cavemen need to survive until there's a food shortage.
Then it's every man for himself.
So to teach that lesson, we're going to play Ahhh! Smashin'.
Oh, is that the game where we smash food in our mouths and go, "Ahhh!"? No.
[laughs.]
Ahhh! Smashin' is 15 students, no rules.
If you're hit with a smash fruit, you're out.
- Last student standing, wins.
- Teacher, actually, there's 16 of us.
Fifteen students left.
Teacher Squawk, we're not gonna fight each other - just 'cause you tell us to.
- Hmm.
Winner gets the meatcher.
[all shouting.]
Let the smashing begin! Well, these nails won't chew themselves.
[panting.]
Hey, Eep, wanna team up? Hmm.
Instead of smash fruits, let's hit each other with hugs.
Like [laughs.]
We could call ourselves Team Croods.
Or, or, or, we can go with a name that will strike fear into the hearts of our enemies, like - Team Fart Monster.
- I don't think so, Thunk.
I have a shot at winning, and You're about to knock yourself out.
But I didn't, because we make such a great team.
Go, Team Fart [grunts.]
[Munk.]
Hooray.
Is what my stomach is saying right now because that meat was perfect, prepared just the way I like it.
Yeah, I was going for a medium dead.
Whoops.
Looks like that one was a little under-killed.
Gotta say, this has been a great Uh, what do you call this thing again? [both.]
A visit.
Well, you can have me over for a visit anytime, all the time.
[laughs.]
[laughs nervously.]
Yeah, uh, well, we'll have to do this again, on a different day than today.
Well, I look forward to that.
[humming.]
Why won't he leave? I mean, is there some part of the visit we forgot? No, we gave him a tour, fed him lunch, made small talk, laughed politely.
He really should go now.
Maybe if we're silent, he'll get bored and take the hint.
Did you just have your place re-dirted? Ooh, cakey.
Now is every part of the floor like this? [grunts.]
[both shout.]
- Hey.
- Hi, Kevin.
Wait, you're not gonna smash me, are you? Nah.
Now just keep being distracted by my dreaminess.
Ah.
Okay.
Wait, what? Ah! You blew it.
I should've known you were just, like, a pretty, like, face.
Thanks.
Oh! Oh, no, my pretty face! That was close, Eep.
You need a new plan.
Like stop calling attention to yourself by thinking out loud.
Huh? [Thunk.]
Hmm.
Ah! [exclaims.]
[Eep.]
Leave my little brother alone! Nice, Eep.
I told you we make a great team.
Uh, no, no.
I was just protecting you 'cause I'm your big sister and you were Making fruit traps.
They're dangerous and delicious.
They're delangericious.
Look.
When you stick your butt up in the air like that, you draw everyone else right to you.
Workin' on a trap Stickin' my butt in the air [laughs.]
- Gotcha.
- Like, clever girl.
[gasps, shrieks.]
[chuckles.]
You know, you're right, Thunk.
We should work together.
Great and I'll assume that weird smile is because you're excited to be on Team Fart Monster.
We can't run from what we are, Eep.
[laughs.]
[giggles.]
Huh.
[grunts.]
- [singing.]
- [Eep.]
Ha! [both.]
Yeah! Grug, is this your tooth-sharpening stick? I always wanted to try one.
No, it's mine.
Let me throw him out of the cave.
Please? I know I can throw him really far.
- No, that would be rude.
- I'm okay with that.
But Munk is my friend, and friends do not do that.
Unless your whole friendship is based on one person throwing the other, like Wal and Loo.
You're the only one who gets me, Wal.
[blowing nose.]
[Grug chuckles.]
Munk, isn't there someone else you would like to visit with? Oh, yeah.
It's been a while since I've seen my sister.
[both sigh.]
[Munk.]
Here she is.
Gunk, can I give you the tour? [Gunk.]
Ooh, is this a teeth-sharpening stick? [Ugga screams.]
[all shouting.]
We splatted all these people, and we didn't use any of my traps.
We're that good! Yep, but [chuckles.]
Pat's still out there, so we're gonna need a special trap to get her.
Maybe you can make one out in the open.
Out in the open.
That's the perfect place to build a trap.
The meatcher is as good as ours.
Mm-hm.
[sighs.]
I hope Thunk'll understand why I was using him as bait.
Sure, I totally understand.
Ah.
[gasps.]
[giggles.]
Gotcha.
Eep, you're using Thunk as bait? Ow! Oh, no, I can't believe She did not, like, do that.
[gasps.]
You you were using me as bait? Wait.
That wasn't Fart Monster's logo, was it? All right, Thunk, you don't have to be bait anymore.
I'll just take you out now.
Don't underestimate me, Eep.
I'm bad to the bone.
Oh! Oh, look, it's a butterhummer.
[giggles.]
It's okay, Thunk.
I'll do it quickly.
You won't feel a thing.
[grunts, fruit smashes.]
[growls.]
How dare you, Eep? [gasps.]
I'll get my revenge! [laughs.]
Oh, it's another butterhummer.
Oh, you're so cute.
What are they doing now? We've done everything a good host should do.
- They just will not go.
- But they must go.
You need to break it to them gently or I'll break them violently.
[chuckles nervously.]
Munk, buddy, we need to talk.
Sure.
We're almost done measuring.
Yeah, the door is six Gunks wide.
Our tree will fit in here.
Should we move it in now, or will we be joining your sleep pile tonight? That is it.
Munk, you're my friend, but if you want to stay that way, get out, get out, get out.
This visit is over.
It is? Whew, finally.
I was waiting for you to tell me I could go.
And I really didn't want to move my tree.
[both sigh.]
Some people really can't take a hint.
So, what do you guys wanna do now? - [groans.]
- [screams.]
[sniffs, gasps.]
Snacky bug shells.
Thunk's stress-eating.
[laughs.]
Got him right where I want him.
[pants.]
[boy shouts.]
[grunts.]
[Thunk.]
Now, to hide in this bush.
[squawks.]
[vine snaps.]
[grunts.]
[gasps.]
Sulk? You were the only other kid left.
[gasps.]
That means it's down to me and Thunk has a message for you.
"Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nah.
You'll never get me.
" - [sighs.]
- [groans.]
[laughs.]
[grunts.]
Wait.
He wants me to chase him.
[groans.]
- [laughs, gasps.]
- [Eep shouts.]
Surprise! Wait.
Why are you smiling? [groans, shouts.]
[screams.]
- [Eep.]
Huh? - [Thunk whistles.]
[continues whistling.]
[sighs.]
I'm sorry I underestimated you, Thunk.
Your traps were great.
I would've been lucky to have you as my teammate.
That's all I ever really wanted.
How about we split the meatcher? Hmm? Team Fart Monster? - Team Fart Monster.
- [smashes.]
Ah.
Was that smash fruit an accident? [giggles.]
I'll never tell.
You? Boy who loses at things? I never thought you'd win.
Yeah, we all underestimated Thunk.
Yay, now I get the meatcher.
About that.
You were all taking too long and I got hungry.
Aw! A man's gotta eat an entire meat sculpture of himself.
- [giggles.]
- [grumbles.]
- Hmm - Hmm.
- [smashes.]
- [Squawk screams.]
[music playing.]
Isn't the Wall of Fame great, kids? Here are the greatest cave people who ever lived, remembered forever.
Yeah.
Brok, creator of the wiping leaf.
Oh, Boff, slayer of the bear owls.
And Org, master of fitting 12 eggs in his mouth.
- Ah, he's an inspiration.
- He's such an inspiration.
And after today, Grug Crood, the valley's first leader.
I mean, they have to choose me.
Now, for the picture, which side looks best? That one.
No, wait, that one.
Oh, it's like picking between the children! Mare the Zapper.
She rubbed fuzzy objects and then zapped people.
- [sizzles.]
- Oh, come on.
No one can - [zaps.]
- Ouch! [gasps.]
So this is what power feels like.
[sizzles, zaps.]
Ow! Power hurts.
[both sizzle.]
[both.]
Ow! Ow! Hush.
Friends, neighbors, half-wits I can barely stand.
Hello.
As head of the Wall of Fame selection team, I'm proud to announce our newest honoree.
This is it, Grug, your moment.
Baitsy! Tell everyone the amazing discovery that earned you this recognition.
Well, I learned that when you rub two sticks together really hard, it makes smoke and nothing else.
Wow, that's fascinating.
So fascinating.
[all cheer.]
Are you kidding me?! I mean, no offense to Baitsy's dumb smoke idea, but that should be my face getting stamped onto the wall.
The only reason I didn't get chosen is that you don't like me, Snoot.
Oh, please.
You think I like Baitsy? What did you do that's wall-worthy? - Uh, I cleaned up the whole town.
- Which started a monkhuahua attack.
Yeah, but I also stopped the Broods on three separate occasions.
And you led them here on four.
Face it, Grug, you're not Wall of Fame material.
Now, the Wall of Bad Smells, on the other hand.
[chuckles.]
[all laugh.]
[exclaims.]
For your information, Grug doesn't smell bad.
He smells weird.
[Grug grunts.]
Who cares what some wall thinks of you? Walls are jerks anyway, always hurting you when you bump into them.
If I'm not on that wall, I won't be remembered forever.
Sure, you will.
You got your kids.
[Eep and Thunk zap, scream.]
Or you've got your best friend.
I'll always be by your side.
Thanks, Munk, but can you be on my other side? I wanna work that part of the trunk.
Grug, buddy, you gotta relax.
You know what I do to calm down? Okay.
Feet shoulder width.
Relax your knees.
Hands in a death-like grip.
Yeah, not feeling as angry, but I am feeling uncomfortable.
Good.
Uncomfortable is good.
Okay, now, hit that rock.
[grunting.]
Whoa.
That was oddly satisfying.
That was even more satisfying.
I just got an idea.
A Wall of Fame-worthy idea.
It is called grunk, a new game where grown cavemen take out their frustration on a tiny object.
And try to sink it in a hole.
Hmm.
You missed.
[laughs.]
Not that hole.
That one.
Ahhh.
[gulps.]
[coughs, chokes.]
Hey! Actually, holes in the ground would work better.
And then you keep walking around until you've done 18 holes.
- Hey, where are you going? - Give it up, Grug.
If I want a long walk that ends in frustration, I can go to the tar pits.
Oh, come on, Snoot.
Other people like it.
[shouts.]
- Take that, tiny object! - [shouts.]
Fine.
Take me around.
But you've only got one "around" to prove you belong on the wall.
- One.
- [Eep and Thunk scream.]
[Snoot.]
Clearly, you haven't thought this through, Grug.
There are obstacles between you and that hole.
Ah.
But that is the best part, Snoot.
Ooh! See.
Fun, right? Yes, all part of the joy of grunk.
[growls.]
Wait! I've been saving this, but what if each player gets a cave child that follows them all day to boss around however they want? My name's Caddy.
Well, Caddy, this club is all wrong.
Bring me a new one.
- Yes, sir.
- And a fancy hat.
- And a smash fruit.
- Sorry.
- To throw in your face.
- Okay.
- [all chatter.]
- Amber hope for Caddy, my shot and I require quiet! Shh! - [all exclaim.]
- Shh! [Munk.]
Holy smoke! Well, there's just no other way to say this.
Your dumb brains didn't make something I hate.
[gasps.]
You mean? The game of grunk deserves this season's spot on the wall.
Sorry, Baitsy.
[sobs.]
So which one of you will be remembered forever and which one of you will be forgotten immediately? There's only room for one face.
Then no, thank you.
Best friends stick together, right, Grug? I prefer this side, but hey, I trust the artist.
What, Munk? Huh? [whimpers.]
What? [zapping.]
[screams, groans.]
Ow! You shocked my eye that time.
Nyah, nyah, nyah! [screams.]
[screaming continues.]
[sizzling.]
[shouts angrily.]
[screams.]
[distorted screams.]
Huh? [gasps, growls.]
Huh? [screams.]
[screams.]
[screams.]
What are you doing, Grug? We made grunk together, as friends.
Sure, you were there, but to cheer on my shots, and since I'm better at it, I clearly invented it.
What? I showed you how to hit a rock with a club, that's pretty much the whole idea.
That's not the whole idea, because the idea of a hole was all mine, as was the obstacles, the walking, the spikes for better traction.
So say it with me, Munk.
Grug made grunk.
Grug made grunk.
Munk made grunk.
Munk made grunk.
[coughs, clears throat.]
There's only one mature way to settle this.
A game.
You two play one around of grunk, and the winner gets the spot on the wall.
- Deal.
- Deal.
[squeals.]
[Grug.]
Ooh, a birdie.
Now that's a shot only the true inventor of grunk could make.
[grumbles.]
[grumbles.]
[panting.]
[howls.]
[laughs.]
Nice backswing.
- Huh? - [Grug gasps.]
[all scream.]
[Grug.]
Okay, okay, this is out of hand, Munk.
Just give up so we can get on with not being stung to death.
Never.
[all continue screaming.]
[all screaming.]
[Gran.]
Hey! Pipe down, you bozos.
I'm trying to get my beauty sleep.
You think this just happens? [all.]
Sorry, Gran.
[both whisper.]
Sorry.
[both mutter.]
- [explosion.]
- [all scream.]
[speaks softly.]
It all comes down to this.
Last hole, tie game.
Not for long.
[Munk grunts.]
[grumbles, grinds teeth.]
Munk, could you grind your teeth somewhere else? - Trying to beat you here, buddy.
- I'm not your buddy, Grug.
Sure, not while we're playing, but we'll go out for smash fruit later.
No, we stopped being buddies when you chose a space on the wall over a space in my heart.
[sobs.]
But wait.
We're We're really not friends? [sobbing.]
[all gasp.]
Then you win, Munk.
I'd rather lose the Wall of Fame than lose a friend.
But I do wish I could have both.
[gasps.]
You can.
No.
I'm the one who's losing.
- No.
Me.
- Oh, yeah? Well - Wait, what are we doing? - I don't even know anymore.
[mutters.]
Wow, you've chosen friendship over glory.
But the inventor of friendship is already on the wall, so neither one of you ever will be.
And this wall is forever.
[screaming.]
[crumbling.]
- [all grunt.]
- [gasps.]
Hey, look, Eep.
[chuckles.]
We made the wall.
[all laugh.]
[music playing.]