Impractical Jokers (2017) s03e12 Episode Script
Anniversary Edition
OKAY, JOE.
WHY'D YOU ASK US HERE TODAY? IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! WHY'D YOU ASK US HERE TODAY? IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! [ ALL CHEERING .]
IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! [ ALL CHEERING .]
THREE YEARS OF [ ALL CHEERING .]
THREE YEARS OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" THREE YEARS OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" HOLY MOLEY! "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" HOLY MOLEY! THAT'S RIGHT! HOLY MOLEY! THAT'S RIGHT! WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST THAT'S RIGHT! WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST CHALLENGE AT WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST CHALLENGE AT CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD CHALLENGE AT CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY DAY.
OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY DAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHOA.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHOA.
OH! WHOA.
OH! SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT OH! SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE ARCADE WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE ARCADE YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
ARCADE YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
WHAT?! THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! PREPARE FOR SOMETHING WHAT?! PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! [ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO WHITE CASTLE.
CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER? SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER? SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, BUDDY.
SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, BUDDY.
BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
BUDDY.
BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH CHEESE.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH CHEESE.
YOU WANT THAT NUMBER 1 YOU WANT THAT NUMBER 1 [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CHEESE [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CHEESE AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
WITH CHEESE AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A LARGE YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A LARGE WITH THAT CHEESE LARGE WITH THAT CHEESE [ CHUCKLES .]
WITH THAT CHEESE [ CHUCKLES .]
LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
[ CHUCKLES .]
LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU SOUL! ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU SOUL! A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SOUL! A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN THAT'S IT.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN THAT'S IT.
YOUR TOTAL THAT'S IT.
YOUR TOTAL ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD YOUR TOTAL ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD I SAID ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD I SAID YOUR TOTAL I SAID YOUR TOTAL IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN YOUR TOTAL IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN NINETY-ONE IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN NINETY-ONE PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
NINETY-ONE PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, BUDDY.
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, BUDDY.
YEAH.
BUDDY.
YEAH.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
YEAH.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
I DO HAVE SOUL.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
I DO HAVE SOUL.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A I DO HAVE SOUL.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A REVEREND.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A REVEREND.
I AM A REVEREND.
REVEREND.
I AM A REVEREND.
THAT'S RIGHT.
I AM A REVEREND.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING THAT'S RIGHT.
WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? [ LAUGHTER .]
CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? [ LAUGHTER .]
IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR [ LAUGHTER .]
IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE EVERYBODY WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE EVERYBODY HELP ME OUT NOW EVERYBODY HELP ME OUT NOW DO YOU HELP ME OUT NOW DO YOU [ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S JUST GOT TO FIND BETH.
WHY THE NAME BETH? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY WHY THE NAME BETH? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY NOT? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY NOT? YES, THAT'S IT.
NOT? YES, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
YES, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
[ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
[ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HUH? [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
HUH? [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
"LOOK, LOOK! JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
"LOOK, LOOK! IS YOUR NAME BETH? "LOOK, LOOK! IS YOUR NAME BETH? MOTHER! IS YOUR NAME BETH? MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! ADIOS.
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! ADIOS.
BETH.
ADIOS.
BETH.
THERE YOU ARE.
BETH.
THERE YOU ARE.
YOU SILLY GOOSE! THERE YOU ARE.
YOU SILLY GOOSE! [ LAUGHS .]
YOU SILLY GOOSE! [ LAUGHS .]
BETH.
[ LAUGHS .]
BETH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? BETH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? SARAH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? SARAH.
WHAT? SARAH.
WHAT? [ BOTH LAUGH .]
WHAT? [ BOTH LAUGH .]
BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW [ BOTH LAUGH .]
BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? SARAH.
YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? SARAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SARAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? I'M SORRY.
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? I'M SORRY.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
I'M SORRY.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
SARAH.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
WHAT IS HE DOING? EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
WHAT IS HE DOING? OH.
WHAT IS HE DOING? OH.
WHAT WAS THAT? OH.
WHAT WAS THAT? DID HE JUST? WHAT WAS THAT? DID HE JUST? ARE YOU, UH DID HE JUST? ARE YOU, UH ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? ARE YOU, UH ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? YEAH.
ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? YEAH.
NO! YEAH.
NO! ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? NO! ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? ARE YOU A BETH? ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? ARE YOU A BETH? YEAH.
ARE YOU A BETH? YEAH.
THAT'S AMAZING.
YEAH.
THAT'S AMAZING.
THAT'S AMAZING.
YEAH.
YEAH.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? YEAH.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? THANK YOU.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? THANK YOU.
"HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I THANK YOU.
"HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED "HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED BETH.
HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED BETH.
CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH BETH.
CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH WHEN I ASK? CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH WHEN I ASK? PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" WHEN I ASK? PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" [ LAUGHING .]
PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" [ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
[ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
CHEATING.
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
CHEATING.
YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
CHEATING.
YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
FOR SHAME.
ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
FOR SHAME.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
FOR SHAME.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR CHEATING.
THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR CHEATING.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
CHEATING.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.
MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE NOW.
MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING AT THE GIRL BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING AT THE GIRL POINTING AT HER! AT THE GIRL POINTING AT HER! YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE POINTING AT HER! YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A BITCH! I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHAT ARE YOU -- BITCH! WHAT ARE YOU -- SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
WHAT ARE YOU -- SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S NEXT CLIP.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S NEXT CLIP.
ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT NEXT CLIP.
ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT THE BORGATA HOTEL IS THAT THEY ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT THE BORGATA HOTEL IS THAT THEY ARE PET-FRIENDLY.
YEAH, THEY ALLOW PETS.
SO Q DECIDED TO BRING I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK SO Q DECIDED TO BRING I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK TODAY, MY CAT.
I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK TODAY, MY CAT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
TODAY, MY CAT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
ALL RIGHT.
JUST LET THEM IN.
ALL RIGHT.
JUST LET THEM IN.
HELP THEM INTO THE BED.
HELP THEM INTO THE BED.
YOU CAN SET THE BAGS DOWN HERE.
WOW.
YOU CAN SET THE BAGS DOWN HERE.
WOW.
YEAH.
WOW.
YEAH.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? YEAH.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
AAH! HERE WE GO.
AAH! AAH! OH! AAH! AAH! OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
AAH! OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
AAH! AAH! AAH! OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
AAH! AAH! AAH! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! AAH! AAH! AAH! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! I HATE THIS THING! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! I HATE THIS THING! YOU [BLEEP.]
I HATE THIS THING! YOU [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
NO! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
NO! STOP IT! NO! STOP IT! PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE STOP IT! PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST THIS INNATE THING -- IF ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST THIS INNATE THING -- IF SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU THIS INNATE THING -- IF SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
"WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
"WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, KITTY-CAT?!" "WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, KITTY-CAT?!" NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE KITTY-CAT?!" NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- JAMES MURRAY CLIP.
ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- JAMES MURRAY CLIP.
YEAH! MURR, THIS GUY IN THE RED, I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIS MOUTH.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIS MOUTH.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO BURN HIS TONGUE.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO BURN HIS TONGUE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? BURN HIS TONGUE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
YEAH.
HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
YEAH.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YEAH.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S COFFEE.
I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S COFFEE.
OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, COFFEE.
OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, SIR? OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, SIR? IS THAT VERY HOT? SIR? IS THAT VERY HOT? WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO IS THAT VERY HOT? WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO APOLOGETIC WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO APOLOGETIC [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TASTE THAT.
IS THAT? TASTE THAT.
IS THAT? MM-MMM.
IS THAT? MM-MMM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MM-MMM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHS .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHS .]
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN [ LAUGHS .]
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN HIS MOUTH.
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN HIS MOUTH.
UH HIS MOUTH.
UH COME ON.
UH COME ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
COME ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY, YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY, YEAH.
YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS OKAY, YEAH.
YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YEAH.
FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YEAH.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO LEER AT YEAH.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO LEER AT HIM.
[ LAUGHS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! HE LEERS BETTER THAN MURRAY.
LOOK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! LOOK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! DON'T BREAK! DON'T YOU BREAK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! DON'T BREAK! DON'T YOU BREAK! OH, MY GOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, GOD.
I WAS SWEATING.
OH, GOD.
I WAS SWEATING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SWEATING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A LEER-OFF.
WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A LEER-OFF.
HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
LEER-OFF.
HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER MURR CLIP.
ONCE AGAIN, THE MURR MAN FINDS HIMSELF IN A POSITION HE WOULD NEVER BE IN.
FINDS HIMSELF IN A POSITION HE WOULD NEVER BE IN.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST WOULD NEVER BE IN.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST LIVING.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST LIVING.
MURR, MURR, MURR! LIVING.
MURR, MURR, MURR! GO UP TO HIM RIGHT NOW.
MURR, MURR, MURR! GO UP TO HIM RIGHT NOW.
IN A VERY, LIKE, SECRETIVE WAY, IN A VERY, LIKE, SECRETIVE WAY, "YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT?" "YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT?" YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL RIGHT?" YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT? YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT? YES.
SERVICE, RIGHT? YES.
"WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO YES.
"WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?" "WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?" [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS?" [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? WHAT? TO DO THIS? WHAT? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO WHAT? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? THIS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO DRYDOM.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO DRYDOM.
[ LAUGHS .]
DRYDOM.
[ LAUGHS .]
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
[ LAUGHS .]
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
OKAY, NOW GO AHEAD, BUD.
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
OKAY, NOW GO AHEAD, BUD.
[ CHUCKLING .]
THERE YOU GO.
THERE YOU GO, MURR.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
THERE YOU GO, MURR.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
YEAH.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
YEAH.
THERE YOU GO, THERE YOU GO! YEAH.
THERE YOU GO, THERE YOU GO! [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S TAKING PICTURES OF HIM! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF HIM! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF MURRAY! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF MURRAY! DO IT! MURRAY! DO IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
DO IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK! MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, LOOK! MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW? HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE RIGHT NOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY VIDEO ON YouTube? YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY VIDEO ON YouTube? [ LAUGHTER .]
VIDEO ON YouTube? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH "JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH "JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
"JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
DON'T LIE.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
DON'T LIE.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube DON'T LIE.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CLIP THAT MURRAY KNOWS IS NOT ON LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CLIP THAT MURRAY KNOWS IS NOT ON THE INTERNET.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HELLO.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
HELLO.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
BANZAI.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
BANZAI.
SO, MURR, START BANGING BANZAI.
SO, MURR, START BANGING AROUND THE SPATULAS.
SO, MURR, START BANGING AROUND THE SPATULAS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SPATULAS BANGING .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
THREATEN SOMEONE WITH THE KNIFE VERY SUBTLY.
THREATEN SOMEONE WITH THE KNIFE VERY SUBTLY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID ANYTHING.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID ANYTHING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ANYTHING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT THE GUY IN WHITE.
YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT THE GUY IN WHITE.
THROW ONE AND GO, "YUMMY!" HE'S GONNA KICK HIS ASS.
YUMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
YUMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED HIBACHI CHEF.
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED HIBACHI CHEF.
"BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO HIBACHI CHEF.
"BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
" "BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
" THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY APARTMENT.
" THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STUDIO APARTMENT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S [ LAUGHTER .]
"SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" "SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON LATELY.
BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON LATELY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
FUTON LATELY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC [ LAUGHTER .]
"I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" "I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
"THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY THE OTHER DAY.
"THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
" "THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
" [ Laughing .]
THANK GOD CAR.
" [ Laughing .]
THANK GOD [ LAUGHS .]
[ Laughing .]
THANK GOD [ LAUGHS .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHS .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! [ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
NO, NO, NO.
YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
NO, NO, NO.
IN THE SLIGHTEST.
NO, NO, NO.
IN THE SLIGHTEST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE IN THE SLIGHTEST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE TOAST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE TOAST.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY TOAST.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
HOW'D THAT GO? PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
HOW'D THAT GO? I ORDERED OUT.
HOW'D THAT GO? I ORDERED OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I ORDERED OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, NOW IT'S TIME TO LOOK AT [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, NOW IT'S TIME TO LOOK AT SOME OF JOE'S CLIPS.
JOE IS NOT A GOOD DANCER, BUT HE DANCES WITH CRAZY PASSION AND CONVICTION.
HE DANCES WITH CRAZY PASSION AND CONVICTION.
5, 6 CONVICTION.
5, 6 HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? 5, 6 HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL WITH HIM.
IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL WITH HIM.
HAS ANYBODY HERE TAKEN A HAS ANYBODY HERE TAKEN A HIP-HOP CLASS BEFORE? JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND HIP-HOP CLASS BEFORE? JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
[ BOTH LAUGH .]
DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
[ BOTH LAUGH .]
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN [ BOTH LAUGH .]
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A DANCE BATTLE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A DANCE BATTLE.
SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE DANCE BATTLE.
SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN THEY GO.
THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN THEY GO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THEY GO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS FOLDED.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS FOLDED.
SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER FOLDED.
SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SIZE YOU UP.
HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SIZE YOU UP.
THIS IS SERVING.
SIZE YOU UP.
THIS IS SERVING.
I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" THIS IS SERVING.
I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" HERE WE GO.
MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" HERE WE GO.
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
HERE WE GO.
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? AND STEP IT OUT.
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? AND STEP IT OUT.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
AND STEP IT OUT.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
WALK AROUND ME.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
WALK AROUND ME.
PSSH! WALK AROUND ME.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP PSSH! RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP AND DO A LITTLE -- RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP AND DO A LITTLE -- YEAH! YEAH! OH! AND DO A LITTLE -- YEAH! YEAH! OH! SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YEAH! YEAH! OH! SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
HAPPENED.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
GOOD.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
GOOD.
THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
GOOD.
THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
YOU GOT SERVED! THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
YOU GOT SERVED! YOU JUST GOT SERVED! YOU GOT SERVED! YOU JUST GOT SERVED! ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP YOU JUST GOT SERVED! ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP OUT.
RELAX.
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP OUT.
RELAX.
JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
OUT.
RELAX.
JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
"OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
"OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR "OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR A SECOND.
" ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR A SECOND.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
A SECOND.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH THE YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH THE THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
THE THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
[ LAUGHING .]
THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
[ LAUGHING .]
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, [ LAUGHING .]
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, HAVING A GOOD TIME.
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, HAVING A GOOD TIME.
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
HAVING A GOOD TIME.
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT [ LAUGHTER .]
WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WORD? OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WORD? THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
WORD? THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
JUST OPEN THE DOOR DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
JUST OPEN THE DOOR [ LAUGHTER .]
JUST OPEN THE DOOR [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
" THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
" THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO MY WIFE.
" THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO FAST.
THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO FAST.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S FAST.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE [ LAUGHTER .]
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU SOME MORE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU SOME MORE NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM I'M OUT HERE DOING VOLUNTEER-SQUAD STUFF IN NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? VOLUNTEER-SQUAD STUFF IN NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? YEAH.
NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? YEAH.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A YEAH.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A VOLUNTEER.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A VOLUNTEER.
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
VOLUNTEER.
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE [ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE FRIENDS WITH ALPACAS.
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE FRIENDS WITH ALPACAS.
YOU KNOW WHAT AN ALPACA IS? YOU KNOW WHAT AN ALPACA IS? THE BIG THING WITH THE NECK AND IT'S HAIRY? THE BIG THING WITH THE NECK AND IT'S HAIRY? YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A IT'S HAIRY? YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A FAKE EMU.
YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A FAKE EMU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
FAKE EMU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO WHAT WE DO AT THE [ LAUGHTER .]
SO WHAT WE DO AT THE PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE SO WHAT WE DO AT THE PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? NO.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? NO.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING NO.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING WITH PALPACA WEAVING? SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING WITH PALPACA WEAVING? NO.
WITH PALPACA WEAVING? NO.
NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE NO.
NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE INTERNET? NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE INTERNET? NO.
INTERNET? NO.
NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU NO.
NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU DO? NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU DO? [ LAUGHTER .]
DO? [ LAUGHTER .]
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE [ LAUGHTER .]
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE AT THIS POINT.
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE AT THIS POINT.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
AT THIS POINT.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG? DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG? UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE LOVE SONG? UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG.
UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG.
LET'S GO.
SONG.
LET'S GO.
VINYADO, VINYADO LET'S GO.
VINYADO, VINYADO VINYADO VINYADO, VINYADO VINYADO DO YOU KNOW? VINYADO DO YOU KNOW? YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? DO YOU KNOW? YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? JULIA.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? JULIA.
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
JULIA.
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER [ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER ON.
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER ON.
BA-BOOM! ON.
BA-BOOM! JUST DO IT.
BA-BOOM! JUST DO IT.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
JUST DO IT.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
PALPACA SOCIETY.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
PALPACA SOCIETY.
MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO PALPACA SOCIETY.
MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
YEAH.
THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
YEAH.
BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
YEAH.
BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN LIFE.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN LIFE.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND LIFE.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND THE PARK IN A BRA.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND THE PARK IN A BRA.
THAT'S HER JOB.
THE PARK IN A BRA.
THAT'S HER JOB.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER THAT'S HER JOB.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER JOE CLIP.
HI.
DOLLAR HOT DOGS? YEAH? WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? YEAH? WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
GOTCHA.
OKAY.
KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
GOTCHA.
OKAY.
"HOLY MOLASSES! GOTCHA.
OKAY.
"HOLY MOLASSES! I GOT TO [BLEEP.]
" "HOLY MOLASSES! I GOT TO [BLEEP.]
" [ GRUNTS .]
[ GRUNTS .]
I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
HOLY MOLASSES.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
HOLY MOLASSES.
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
HOLY MOLASSES.
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHING .]
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, [ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, SLINGING DOGS YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, SLINGING DOGS I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
SLINGING DOGS I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
RELISH OR NO? [ LAUGHTER .]
RELISH OR NO? YEAH.
RELISH OR NO? YEAH.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME YEAH.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME THINK.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME THINK.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" THINK.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO, THIS IS GONNA [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, THIS IS GONNA IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SO, THIS IS GONNA IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANKS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANKS.
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED THANKS.
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE TIME.
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE TIME.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! TIME.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! I'M HUMAN.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! I'M HUMAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I'M HUMAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS OF Q.
THANKS, EVERYBODY, FOR COMING.
Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
COMING.
Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
ALL RIGHT.
DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
ALL RIGHT.
WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW ALL RIGHT.
WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW STARTED, HUH? WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW STARTED, HUH? AND SO IT BEGINS.
AND SO IT BEGINS.
Together: "THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON"! Together: "THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON"! [ LAUGHTER .]
HAT ON"! [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, THANK YOU.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, HAVE A HAT.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, HAVE A HAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HAVE A HAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
UH, LET'S -- LET'S SEE THE NEXT ALL RIGHT.
UH, LET'S -- LET'S SEE THE NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
THIS IS THE, UH HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THIS IS THE, UH HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
[ LAUGHTER .]
CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH! EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO OH! EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO USE THE BEDPAN.
EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO USE THE BEDPAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
USE THE BEDPAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU GOT THE -- [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU GOT THE -- THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK YOU GOT THE -- THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK SICK.
EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK SICK.
YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! SICK.
YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
OH, MY GOD.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
OH, MY GOD.
YEP.
OH, MY GOD.
YEP.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
YEP.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, RIGHT? THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, RIGHT? YEAH.
RIGHT? YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT, UH, NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT, UH, NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
IT'S JUST A DELIVERY GUY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
I THINK THAT HE JUST -- [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
I THINK THAT HE JUST -- I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST I THINK THAT HE JUST -- I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING AROUND.
ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING AROUND.
IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF AROUND.
IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" RIGHT, RIGHT! "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" RIGHT, RIGHT! IT WAS CRAZY.
RIGHT, RIGHT! IT WAS CRAZY.
NOW LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT A IT WAS CRAZY.
NOW LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT A NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIP OF Q.
EXCUSE ME, SIR? EXCUSE ME.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
EXCUSE ME.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL A I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL A BLACK RAPHAEL.
A BLACK RAPHAEL.
YOU KNOW, THE GUY, YOU KNOW, THE GUY, BLACK RAPHAEL? I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH BLACK RAPHAEL? I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE OH, GOD.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE OH, GOD.
I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH OH, GOD.
I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP YOUR ASS AND TO THE LEFT, I I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP YOUR ASS AND TO THE LEFT, I GUESS.
CAN I BORROW YOURS JUST TO MAKE A PHONE CALL? REAL QUICK -- TO BLACK RAPHAEL.
A PHONE CALL? REAL QUICK -- TO BLACK RAPHAEL.
HE'S WALKING AROUND THINKING HE'S WALKING AROUND THINKING LIBERACE'S STILL ALIVE! ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! LIBERACE'S STILL ALIVE! ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LIBERACE? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIBERACE? THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, LIBERACE? THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
I DON'T KNOW.
FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
I DON'T KNOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I DON'T KNOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY [ LAUGHTER .]
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR [ LAUGHTER .]
GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR [ LAUGHTER .]
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEXT [ LAUGHTER .]
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEXT CLIP.
Q, I WANT YOU TO TAKE YOUR BOOTS OFF AND PUT THEM IN SOMEONE'S CART.
BOOTS OFF AND PUT THEM IN SOMEONE'S CART.
[ LAUGHS .]
SOMEONE'S CART.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
THERE YOU GO.
THERE YOU GO.
OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! YOU GOT THEM.
OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! YOU GOT THEM.
SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT YOU GOT THEM.
SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE THEM.
TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE THEM.
OH, HER HUSBAND'S THERE, TOO, THEM.
OH, HER HUSBAND'S THERE, TOO, NOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S POINTING IT OUT TO HER.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S POINTING IT OUT TO HER.
[ LAUGHS .]
Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND [ LAUGHS .]
Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
COME ON.
ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
COME ON.
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
COME ON.
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHS .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHS .]
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE [ LAUGHS .]
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE TWO.
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE TWO.
WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN TWO.
WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? [ LAUGHTER .]
ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S NOT DEAD.
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S NOT DEAD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
HE'S NOT DEAD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
OH, MY GOD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
PEOPLE ARE STARING.
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
PEOPLE ARE STARING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE PEOPLE ARE STARING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
[ MOANS .]
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
[ MOANS .]
ALL GOOD HERE.
[ MOANS .]
ALL GOOD HERE.
JUST CHILLIN'.
ALL GOOD HERE.
JUST CHILLIN'.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JUST CHILLIN'.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE THUMBS UP.
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE THUMBS UP.
YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
THUMBS UP.
YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS EPISODE.
DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS EPISODE.
I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU EPISODE.
I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT ME.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT ME.
SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
ME.
SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK HOMELESS.
HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK HOMELESS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HOMELESS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO THE INTERVENTION [ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO THE INTERVENTION EPISODE OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WELL, GUYS, WE DID IT.
THERE IT IS -- THREE YEARS OF THERE IT IS -- THREE YEARS OF FUN.
FUN.
CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS.
CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS.
AND THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY AT AND THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY AT HOME WHO HAVE SUPPORTED US THE HOME WHO HAVE SUPPORTED US THE ENTIRE TIME.
ENTIRE TIME.
WE COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WE COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU.
WITHOUT YOU.
AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEXT 300 YEARS.
THE NEXT 300 YEARS.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WELL, I'LL BE DEAD IN TWO.
WELL, I'LL BE DEAD IN TWO.
CHEERS, EVERYONE! CHEERS, EVERYONE! CHEERS!
WHY'D YOU ASK US HERE TODAY? IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! WHY'D YOU ASK US HERE TODAY? IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! [ ALL CHEERING .]
IT'S OUR ANNIVERSARY! [ ALL CHEERING .]
THREE YEARS OF [ ALL CHEERING .]
THREE YEARS OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" THREE YEARS OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" HOLY MOLEY! "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" HOLY MOLEY! THAT'S RIGHT! HOLY MOLEY! THAT'S RIGHT! WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST THAT'S RIGHT! WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST CHALLENGE AT WE SHOT OUR VERY FIRST CHALLENGE AT CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD CHALLENGE AT CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY CHINATOWN BRASSERIE, EATING FOOD OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY DAY.
OFF PEOPLE'S PLATES ON THIS VERY DAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHOA.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHOA.
OH! WHOA.
OH! SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT OH! SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE SO, TO CELEBRATE, I THOUGHT WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE ARCADE WE'D HAVE A PARTY AT THE ARCADE YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
ARCADE YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME YEAH, THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.
AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT AND THEN WE'D SPEND TIME SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
SHOWING SOME UNAIRED CLIPS THAT NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
NO ONE HAS EVER SEEN BEFORE.
THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
WHAT?! THAT'S A GREAT IDEA.
WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! THEY'RE UNAIRED CLIPS! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! YES! IT'S INSANITY! WHAT?! PREPARE FOR SOMETHING WHAT?! PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! [ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO WHITE CASTLE.
CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER? SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, CAN I TAKE YOUR ORDER? SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, BUDDY.
SAL, HAVE A LOT OF SOUL HERE, BUDDY.
BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
BUDDY.
BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH BE LIKE A SOULFUL R&B SINGER.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH CHEESE.
YES, I'D LIKE A NUMBER 1 WITH CHEESE.
YOU WANT THAT NUMBER 1 YOU WANT THAT NUMBER 1 [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CHEESE [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CHEESE AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
WITH CHEESE AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A AND MAKE THAT A LARGE.
YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A LARGE YOU WANT TO MAKE IT A LARGE WITH THAT CHEESE LARGE WITH THAT CHEESE [ CHUCKLES .]
WITH THAT CHEESE [ CHUCKLES .]
LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
[ CHUCKLES .]
LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU LITTLE MORE SOUL, BUDDY.
ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU SOUL! ALL RIGHT, I'M GIVING YOU SOUL! A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SOUL! A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN A SIX-PIECE CHICKEN.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN THAT'S IT.
SIX-PIECE CHICKEN THAT'S IT.
YOUR TOTAL THAT'S IT.
YOUR TOTAL ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD YOUR TOTAL ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD I SAID ONE MORE TIME FOR THE LORD I SAID YOUR TOTAL I SAID YOUR TOTAL IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN YOUR TOTAL IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN NINETY-ONE IS FIFTE-E-E-E-E-EN NINETY-ONE PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
NINETY-ONE PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PLEASE DRIVE AROUND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, BUDDY.
YOU DEFINITELY HAVE SOUL, BUDDY.
YEAH.
BUDDY.
YEAH.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
YEAH.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
I DO HAVE SOUL.
IT'S TRUE.
I DO.
I DO HAVE SOUL.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A I DO HAVE SOUL.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A REVEREND.
SAL, YOU'RE ACTUALLY A REVEREND.
I AM A REVEREND.
REVEREND.
I AM A REVEREND.
THAT'S RIGHT.
I AM A REVEREND.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
SAL OFFICIATED JOE'S WEDDING.
THAT'S RIGHT.
WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING THAT'S RIGHT.
WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? WHY WASN'T MY WEDDING CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? [ LAUGHTER .]
CEREMONY SO SOULFUL? [ LAUGHTER .]
IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR [ LAUGHTER .]
IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE IMAGINE I CAME OUT OF YOUR WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE EVERYBODY WEDDING AND I WAS LIKE EVERYBODY HELP ME OUT NOW EVERYBODY HELP ME OUT NOW DO YOU HELP ME OUT NOW DO YOU [ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S JUST GOT TO FIND BETH.
WHY THE NAME BETH? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY WHY THE NAME BETH? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY NOT? THE ONLY REAL ANSWER IS, WHY NOT? YES, THAT'S IT.
NOT? YES, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
YES, THAT'S IT.
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
[ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
THAT'S THE ONLY ANSWER.
[ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HUH? [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
HUH? [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
OH, MY GOD! [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU [ SPEAKING SPANISH .]
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
I'M GONNA TRANSLATE WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
"LOOK, LOOK! JUST SAID TO THAT GIRL.
"LOOK, LOOK! IS YOUR NAME BETH? "LOOK, LOOK! IS YOUR NAME BETH? MOTHER! IS YOUR NAME BETH? MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! ADIOS.
MOTHER, MOTHER! LOOK, LOOK! ADIOS.
BETH.
ADIOS.
BETH.
THERE YOU ARE.
BETH.
THERE YOU ARE.
YOU SILLY GOOSE! THERE YOU ARE.
YOU SILLY GOOSE! [ LAUGHS .]
YOU SILLY GOOSE! [ LAUGHS .]
BETH.
[ LAUGHS .]
BETH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? BETH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? SARAH.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? SARAH.
WHAT? SARAH.
WHAT? [ BOTH LAUGH .]
WHAT? [ BOTH LAUGH .]
BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW [ BOTH LAUGH .]
BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? BUT WHAT DO PEOPLE WHO KNOW YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? SARAH.
YOU AND LOVE YOU CALL YOU? SARAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SARAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? I'M SORRY.
YOU COULDN'T HELP ME OUT? I'M SORRY.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
I'M SORRY.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
SARAH.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT, BETH.
SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
SARAH, SARAH.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
ALL RIGHT, THANKS, SARAH.
EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
WHAT IS HE DOING? EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.
WHAT IS HE DOING? OH.
WHAT IS HE DOING? OH.
WHAT WAS THAT? OH.
WHAT WAS THAT? DID HE JUST? WHAT WAS THAT? DID HE JUST? ARE YOU, UH DID HE JUST? ARE YOU, UH ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? ARE YOU, UH ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? YEAH.
ARE YOU BETH, BY ANY CHANCE? YEAH.
NO! YEAH.
NO! ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? NO! ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? ARE YOU A BETH? ARE YOU A BETH, FOR REAL? ARE YOU A BETH? YEAH.
ARE YOU A BETH? YEAH.
THAT'S AMAZING.
YEAH.
THAT'S AMAZING.
THAT'S AMAZING.
YEAH.
YEAH.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? YEAH.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? THANK YOU.
CAN I SEE THAT NOTE? THANK YOU.
"HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I THANK YOU.
"HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED "HI.
I'M PLAYING A GAME, AND I HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED BETH.
HAVE TO FIND A PERSON NAMED BETH.
CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH BETH.
CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH WHEN I ASK? CAN YOU SAY YOUR NAME IS BETH WHEN I ASK? PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" WHEN I ASK? PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" [ LAUGHING .]
PLEASE AND THANKS, SAL.
" [ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
[ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
CHEATING.
YOU'RE A CHEATING S.
O.
B.
CHEATING.
YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
CHEATING.
YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN YOUR NAME IS NOT BETH.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
SHAME ON YOU FOR JOINING IN ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
FOR SHAME.
ON HIS SHENANIGANS.
FOR SHAME.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
FOR SHAME.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
YOU CAN'T GET PAST US, BUDDY.
THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THERE'S CAMERAS EVERYWHERE.
HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR HONESTLY, HOW DARE YOU, THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR CHEATING.
THOUGH, COME DOWN ON ME FOR CHEATING.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
CHEATING.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
YOU CHEAT ALL THE TIME.
DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT DON'T TRY AND SWAP THIS.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.
WE'RE DEALING WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.
MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE NOW.
MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, MY FAVORITE PART OF THE WHOLE THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING THING IS -- OKAY, YOU CHEATED, BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING AT THE GIRL BUT THEN THESE TWO START YELLING AT THE GIRL POINTING AT HER! AT THE GIRL POINTING AT HER! YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE POINTING AT HER! YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" YOU'RE LIKE, "YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!" I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A BITCH! I WAS LIKE, "YOU SON OF A BITCH! WHAT ARE YOU -- BITCH! WHAT ARE YOU -- SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
WHAT ARE YOU -- SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S SHE WENT HOME AND CRIED.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S NEXT CLIP.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SAL'S NEXT CLIP.
ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT NEXT CLIP.
ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT THE BORGATA HOTEL IS THAT THEY ONE OF THE GREAT THINGS ABOUT THE BORGATA HOTEL IS THAT THEY ARE PET-FRIENDLY.
YEAH, THEY ALLOW PETS.
SO Q DECIDED TO BRING I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK SO Q DECIDED TO BRING I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK TODAY, MY CAT.
I BROUGHT BENJAMIN TO WORK TODAY, MY CAT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
TODAY, MY CAT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT, COME ON IN.
ALL RIGHT.
JUST LET THEM IN.
ALL RIGHT.
JUST LET THEM IN.
HELP THEM INTO THE BED.
HELP THEM INTO THE BED.
YOU CAN SET THE BAGS DOWN HERE.
WOW.
YOU CAN SET THE BAGS DOWN HERE.
WOW.
YEAH.
WOW.
YEAH.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? YEAH.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
WHOSE SHIRT IS THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? I'M NOT SURE.
OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? OH.
OH, WHAT'S THAT? IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF IS THAT YOUR SHIRT, BUDDY? CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
CHECK THE CLOSET AND SEE IF THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THERE'S ANYTHING IN THE CLOSET.
I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE I BET YOU IN THE CLOSET IN THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
THE BATHROOM, THERE MIGHT BE SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
SOME MORE OF YOUR STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
AAH! HERE WE GO.
AAH! AAH! OH! AAH! AAH! OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
AAH! OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
AAH! AAH! AAH! OH [BLEEP.]
[BLEEP.]
AAH! AAH! AAH! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! AAH! AAH! AAH! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! OH, NOT AGAIN, NOT AGAIN! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! I HATE THIS THING! I HATE THIS [BLEEP.]
THING! I HATE THIS THING! YOU [BLEEP.]
I HATE THIS THING! YOU [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
HE'S COMING! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
NO! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
NO! STOP IT! NO! STOP IT! PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE STOP IT! PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I RUN, AND THE ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST THIS INNATE THING -- IF ANSWER IS SIMPLE -- IT'S JUST THIS INNATE THING -- IF SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU THIS INNATE THING -- IF SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
SOMETHING'S CHASING YOU, YOU DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, DON'T WANT IT TO GET YOU.
NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT NEXT TIME IT HAPPENS, BUD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH BECAUSE YOU KNOW WE'LL DO IT AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE AGAIN, JUST HAUL OFF AND PUNCH IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" IT IN THE HEAD, AND THEN BE LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
LIKE, "IS THAT FUNNY?!" THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
"WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, THAT'LL BE THE END OF IT.
"WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, KITTY-CAT?!" "WHO'S LAUGHING NOW, KITTY-CAT?!" NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE KITTY-CAT?!" NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- NOW IT'S THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- JAMES MURRAY CLIP.
ALL BEEN WAITING FOR -- JAMES MURRAY CLIP.
YEAH! MURR, THIS GUY IN THE RED, I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIS MOUTH.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIS MOUTH.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO BURN HIS TONGUE.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WANT HIM TO BURN HIS TONGUE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? BURN HIS TONGUE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO, FELLAS? HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
YEAH.
HE'S DRINKING HOT COFFEE.
YEAH.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YEAH.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
NEEDS TO COOL DOWN.
YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? YOU GOT TO COOL IT DOWN.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S COFFEE.
I'M SAYING BLOW ON THIS GUY'S COFFEE.
OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, COFFEE.
OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, SIR? OH, IS THAT TOO HOT FOR YOU, SIR? IS THAT VERY HOT? SIR? IS THAT VERY HOT? WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO IS THAT VERY HOT? WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO APOLOGETIC WE MADE A BRAND-NEW POT, SO APOLOGETIC [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TASTE THAT.
IS THAT? TASTE THAT.
IS THAT? MM-MMM.
IS THAT? MM-MMM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MM-MMM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHS .]
PASTRAMI REUBEN.
[ LAUGHS .]
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN [ LAUGHS .]
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN HIS MOUTH.
BLOW IT AS HE'S PUTTING IT IN HIS MOUTH.
UH HIS MOUTH.
UH COME ON.
UH COME ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
COME ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OPEN UP FOR A SECOND.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY, YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY, YEAH.
YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS OKAY, YEAH.
YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YOU SEE THAT GUY SITTING ACROSS FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YEAH.
FROM THE GUY IN THE SUIT? YEAH.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO LEER AT YEAH.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO LEER AT HIM.
[ LAUGHS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! HE LEERS BETTER THAN MURRAY.
LOOK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! LOOK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! DON'T BREAK! DON'T YOU BREAK! IT'S A STAREDOWN! DON'T BREAK! DON'T YOU BREAK! OH, MY GOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, GOD.
I WAS SWEATING.
OH, GOD.
I WAS SWEATING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SWEATING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS THAT WAS INTENSE, BUDDY.
NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO NO, I LIKED THAT THE GUY WAS JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
JUST WAITING FOR HIM TO LOSE TO LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? LAUGH IT OFF, TOO.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A THAT GUY, HE LOOKED LIKE HE WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A LEER-OFF.
WOKE UP THIS MORNING READY FOR A LEER-OFF.
HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
LEER-OFF.
HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU HE'S A PROFESSIONAL.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
IT ACTUALLY LOOKED LIKE YOU TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
TWO WERE RELATED SOMEHOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER MURR CLIP.
ONCE AGAIN, THE MURR MAN FINDS HIMSELF IN A POSITION HE WOULD NEVER BE IN.
FINDS HIMSELF IN A POSITION HE WOULD NEVER BE IN.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST WOULD NEVER BE IN.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST LIVING.
JUST TRYING TO MAKE AN HONEST LIVING.
MURR, MURR, MURR! LIVING.
MURR, MURR, MURR! GO UP TO HIM RIGHT NOW.
MURR, MURR, MURR! GO UP TO HIM RIGHT NOW.
IN A VERY, LIKE, SECRETIVE WAY, IN A VERY, LIKE, SECRETIVE WAY, "YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT?" "YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT?" YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL RIGHT?" YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT? YEAH, YOU GOT THE FULL SERVICE, RIGHT? YES.
SERVICE, RIGHT? YES.
"WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO YES.
"WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?" "WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?" [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS?" [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? ALL RIGHT, WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? WHAT? TO DO THIS? WHAT? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO WHAT? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? SO WHERE DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? THIS? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE THAT MEANS HANDS-FREE DRYING.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
SO YOU JUST PUT THE RAG IN THE FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO FRONT OF YOUR PANTS HERE.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO DRYDOM.
YOU'RE GONNA HUMP THIS CAR INTO DRYDOM.
[ LAUGHS .]
DRYDOM.
[ LAUGHS .]
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
[ LAUGHS .]
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
OKAY, NOW GO AHEAD, BUD.
TUCK IT RIGHT IN.
OKAY, NOW GO AHEAD, BUD.
[ CHUCKLING .]
THERE YOU GO.
THERE YOU GO, MURR.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
THERE YOU GO, MURR.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
YEAH.
HANDS BEHIND YOUR HEAD.
YEAH.
THERE YOU GO, THERE YOU GO! YEAH.
THERE YOU GO, THERE YOU GO! [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S TAKING PICTURES OF HIM! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF HIM! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF MURRAY! THEY'RE BOTH TAKING PICTURES OF MURRAY! DO IT! MURRAY! DO IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
DO IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK! [ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK! MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, LOOK! MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL MURR, ON A SCALE OF 1 TO 10, HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW? HOW MUCH OF AN IDIOT DO YOU FEEL LIKE RIGHT NOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE RIGHT NOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO I FEEL LIKE A JACKASS.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
I WANT TO KNOW WHY THAT VIDEO HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY HASN'T WOUND UP ON YouTube YET.
YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY VIDEO ON YouTube? YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERY VIDEO ON YouTube? [ LAUGHTER .]
VIDEO ON YouTube? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH "JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? HOW OFTEN DO YOU INTERNET SEARCH "JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
"JAMES MURRAY HUMPING"? OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
DON'T LIE.
YOU HAVE ALERTS SET UP.
DON'T LIE.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube DON'T LIE.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
THERE'S A WHOLE YouTube CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CHANNEL DEVOTED TO IT.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CLIP THAT MURRAY KNOWS IS NOT ON LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER CLIP THAT MURRAY KNOWS IS NOT ON THE INTERNET.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HELLO.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
HELLO.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
BANZAI.
SAYO-- UH, BA-- BANZAI.
BANZAI.
SO, MURR, START BANGING BANZAI.
SO, MURR, START BANGING AROUND THE SPATULAS.
SO, MURR, START BANGING AROUND THE SPATULAS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SPATULAS BANGING .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
THREATEN SOMEONE WITH THE KNIFE VERY SUBTLY.
THREATEN SOMEONE WITH THE KNIFE VERY SUBTLY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
HE'S EYEBALLING.
HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID HE'S ALREADY PISSED.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID ANYTHING.
MURRAY HASN'T EVEN SAID ANYTHING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ANYTHING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT ALL RIGHT, MURR, JUST WANT YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT THE GUY IN WHITE.
YOU TO THROW A FULL SQUASH AT THE GUY IN WHITE.
THROW ONE AND GO, "YUMMY!" HE'S GONNA KICK HIS ASS.
YUMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
YUMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED HIBACHI CHEF.
MURR, BE THE MOST DEPRESSED HIBACHI CHEF.
"BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO HIBACHI CHEF.
"BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
" "BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
" THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY APARTMENT.
" THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
THE BANK FORECLOSED ON MY STUDIO APARTMENT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STUDIO APARTMENT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S [ LAUGHTER .]
"SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" "SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON.
" BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON LATELY.
BEEN SLEEPING ON MY FRIEND'S FUTON LATELY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
FUTON LATELY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC [ LAUGHTER .]
"I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" "I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
" I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
I GOT REAR-ENDED IN TRAFFIC THE OTHER DAY.
"THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY THE OTHER DAY.
"THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
" "THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
" [ Laughing .]
THANK GOD CAR.
" [ Laughing .]
THANK GOD [ LAUGHS .]
[ Laughing .]
THANK GOD [ LAUGHS .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHS .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANK GOD I WASN'T IN MY CAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! [ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
[ Laughing .]
THESE PEOPLE! YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
NO, NO, NO.
YOU DON'T COOK AT ALL.
NO, NO, NO.
IN THE SLIGHTEST.
NO, NO, NO.
IN THE SLIGHTEST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE IN THE SLIGHTEST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE TOAST.
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO MAKE TOAST.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY TOAST.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
NO, I TRIED TO COOK FOR MY PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
HOW'D THAT GO? PARENTS THE OTHER DAY.
HOW'D THAT GO? I ORDERED OUT.
HOW'D THAT GO? I ORDERED OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I ORDERED OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, NOW IT'S TIME TO LOOK AT [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, NOW IT'S TIME TO LOOK AT SOME OF JOE'S CLIPS.
JOE IS NOT A GOOD DANCER, BUT HE DANCES WITH CRAZY PASSION AND CONVICTION.
HE DANCES WITH CRAZY PASSION AND CONVICTION.
5, 6 CONVICTION.
5, 6 HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? 5, 6 HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL HEY.
HOW'S IT GOING? IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL WITH HIM.
IT'S 99% CONVICTION, 1% SKILL WITH HIM.
HAS ANYBODY HERE TAKEN A HAS ANYBODY HERE TAKEN A HIP-HOP CLASS BEFORE? JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND HIP-HOP CLASS BEFORE? JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
JOE, GET THE TALL GUY AND DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
[ BOTH LAUGH .]
DEMAND THAT HE SERVE YOU.
[ BOTH LAUGH .]
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN [ BOTH LAUGH .]
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
SO, WE'RE GONNA DO AN INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A INTRODUCTION TO SERVING HERE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A DANCE BATTLE.
A SERVE IS BASICALLY LIKE A DANCE BATTLE.
SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE DANCE BATTLE.
SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND SO, THE THING, YOU KNOW, WHERE PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN PEOPLE TAKE TURNS DANCING AND DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS DOING THEIR BEST MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN ONE PERSON LOOKSAT THEM AS THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN THEY GO.
THEY DO THEIR MOVES, AND THEN THEY GO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THEY GO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
SIR, STEP FORWARD.
WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT I MEAN.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS FOLDED.
STAND THERE WITH YOUR ARMS FOLDED.
SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER FOLDED.
SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SO, YOU KNOW, YOU CAN START OVER HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SIZE YOU UP.
HERE, AND I'M LIKE, I COME UP, I SIZE YOU UP.
THIS IS SERVING.
SIZE YOU UP.
THIS IS SERVING.
I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" THIS IS SERVING.
I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I I'M LIKE, "ALL RIGHT.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" I MIGHT GIVE YOU A NICKNAME -- I MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" HERE WE GO.
MIGHT SAY "TOO TALL.
" HERE WE GO.
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
HERE WE GO.
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BOOM! AND I DROP IT ON YOU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? AND STEP IT OUT.
LIKE THAT, RIGHT? AND STEP IT OUT.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
AND STEP IT OUT.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
WALK AROUND ME.
AND NOW YOU SERVE.
WALK AROUND ME.
PSSH! WALK AROUND ME.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? THERE HE IS.
PSSH! RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP PSSH! RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP AND DO A LITTLE -- RIGHT? AND NOW YOU JUST COME UP AND DO A LITTLE -- YEAH! YEAH! OH! AND DO A LITTLE -- YEAH! YEAH! OH! SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YEAH! YEAH! OH! SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
SEE? I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
HAPPENED.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
GOOD.
THAT WAS GREAT.
GOOD.
GOOD.
THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
GOOD.
THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
YOU GOT SERVED! THAT WAS LIKE A KARATE MOVE.
YOU GOT SERVED! YOU JUST GOT SERVED! YOU GOT SERVED! YOU JUST GOT SERVED! ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP YOU JUST GOT SERVED! ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP OUT.
RELAX.
ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, BOP OUT.
RELAX.
JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
OUT.
RELAX.
JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
"OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK JUST FEEL THE MUSIC.
"OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR "OKAY, I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR A SECOND.
" ABOUT THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED FOR A SECOND.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
A SECOND.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH SO, I'M JUST GONNA TALK TO YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH THE YOU REAL QUICK ABOUT THE, UH THE THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
THE THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
[ LAUGHING .]
THE NIGHT MY WIFE DIED.
[ LAUGHING .]
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, [ LAUGHING .]
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, HAVING A GOOD TIME.
SO, WE ARE OUT DANCING, HAVING A GOOD TIME.
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
HAVING A GOOD TIME.
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT NIGHT, GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT [ LAUGHTER .]
WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WHY DON'T YOU JUST DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WORD? OF THE ROOM WITHOUT SAYING A WORD? THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
WORD? THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
THAT'S IT, BUDDY.
JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! JUST RIGHT OUT OF THE ROOM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
DANCE OUT OF THE ROOM! DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
JUST OPEN THE DOOR DON'T SAY A WORD TO THEM.
JUST OPEN THE DOOR [ LAUGHTER .]
JUST OPEN THE DOOR [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
" THAT WAS INSANE -- "GOD SERVED MY WIFE.
" THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO MY WIFE.
" THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO FAST.
THAT ROOM GOT SO WEIRD SO FAST.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S FAST.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
IF YOU NOTICE, EVERYONE'S BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BLURRED IN THAT ROOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE [ LAUGHTER .]
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU SOME MORE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'RE GONNA SHOW YOU SOME MORE NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM I'M OUT HERE DOING VOLUNTEER-SQUAD STUFF IN NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? VOLUNTEER-SQUAD STUFF IN NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? YEAH.
NEW YORK CITY, RIGHT? YEAH.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A YEAH.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A VOLUNTEER.
SO, YOU SIGN UP TO BE A VOLUNTEER.
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
VOLUNTEER.
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS IS THE PALPACA SOCIETY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE [ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE FRIENDS WITH ALPACAS.
IT'S PEOPLE WHO ARE GONNA BE FRIENDS WITH ALPACAS.
YOU KNOW WHAT AN ALPACA IS? YOU KNOW WHAT AN ALPACA IS? THE BIG THING WITH THE NECK AND IT'S HAIRY? THE BIG THING WITH THE NECK AND IT'S HAIRY? YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A IT'S HAIRY? YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A FAKE EMU.
YOU KNOW IT SORT OF LOOKS LIKE A FAKE EMU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
FAKE EMU.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO WHAT WE DO AT THE [ LAUGHTER .]
SO WHAT WE DO AT THE PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE SO WHAT WE DO AT THE PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED PALPACA SOCIETY IS WE RESCUE ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
ALPACAS THAT HAVE BEEN ABANDONED BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? BY THEIR ALPACA OWNERS.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? NO.
DO YOU GUYS CROCHET? NO.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING NO.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
NO? 'CAUSE WE WERE LOOKING FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
FOR PALPACA BLANKETS.
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE CALL THEM PAL-BLANKETS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING WITH PALPACA WEAVING? SO, UH, DO YOU GUYS DO ANYTHING WITH PALPACA WEAVING? NO.
WITH PALPACA WEAVING? NO.
NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE NO.
NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE INTERNET? NO? ARE YOU GOOD ON THE INTERNET? NO.
INTERNET? NO.
NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU NO.
NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU DO? NO? WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
DO YOU DO? [ LAUGHTER .]
DO? [ LAUGHTER .]
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE [ LAUGHTER .]
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE AT THIS POINT.
I'M NOT SURE YOU CAN HELP ANYONE AT THIS POINT.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
AT THIS POINT.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
JUST DOING PORTUGUESE MAINLY.
YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU SPEAK PORTUGUESE.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
OBRIGADO, RIGHT? YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING.
DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG? DON'T YOU KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG? UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE LOVE SONG? UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG.
UM, I KNOW A PORTUGUESE LOVE SONG.
LET'S GO.
SONG.
LET'S GO.
VINYADO, VINYADO LET'S GO.
VINYADO, VINYADO VINYADO VINYADO, VINYADO VINYADO DO YOU KNOW? VINYADO DO YOU KNOW? YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? DO YOU KNOW? YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
YOU DON'T KNOW THAT ONE? IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT WAS ALL THE RAGE LAST YEAR.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? JULIA.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? JULIA.
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
JULIA.
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA.
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER [ LAUGHTER .]
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER ON.
JULIA'S GONNA GET HER VOLUNTEER ON.
BA-BOOM! ON.
BA-BOOM! JUST DO IT.
BA-BOOM! JUST DO IT.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
JUST DO IT.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
HE'S GETTING THEM.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
PALPACA SOCIETY.
YEAH, ABSOLUTELY.
PALPACA SOCIETY.
MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO PALPACA SOCIETY.
MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU MY THING IS, YOU'RE TRYING TO GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT GET THEM TO VOLUNTEER, AND YOU LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
LITERALLY ASKED THE GIRL WHAT THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
YEAH.
THE [BLEEP.]
SHE DOES.
YEAH.
BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
YEAH.
BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN BUT SHE DID NOTHING.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN LIFE.
SHE HAD NO DISCERNIBLE SKILLS IN LIFE.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND LIFE.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND THE PARK IN A BRA.
HER JOB WAS TO WALK AROUND THE PARK IN A BRA.
THAT'S HER JOB.
THE PARK IN A BRA.
THAT'S HER JOB.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER THAT'S HER JOB.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT ANOTHER JOE CLIP.
HI.
DOLLAR HOT DOGS? YEAH? WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? YEAH? WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE? KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
GOTCHA.
OKAY.
KETCHUP, MUSTARD, RELISH.
GOTCHA.
OKAY.
"HOLY MOLASSES! GOTCHA.
OKAY.
"HOLY MOLASSES! I GOT TO [BLEEP.]
" "HOLY MOLASSES! I GOT TO [BLEEP.]
" [ GRUNTS .]
[ GRUNTS .]
I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
HOLY MOLASSES.
[ EXHALES SHARPLY .]
HOLY MOLASSES.
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
HOLY MOLASSES.
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHING .]
I GOTS TO [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, [ LAUGHING .]
YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, SLINGING DOGS YOU'RE OUT HERE ALL DAY, SLINGING DOGS I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
SLINGING DOGS I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I GOT A FOOTER COMING OUT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
RELISH OR NO? [ LAUGHTER .]
RELISH OR NO? YEAH.
RELISH OR NO? YEAH.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME YEAH.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME THINK.
OH, THIS RELISH IS MAKING ME THINK.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" THINK.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
"AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
" AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND IT'S BETWEEN THE BUNS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SO, THIS IS GONNA [ LAUGHTER .]
SO, THIS IS GONNA IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SO, THIS IS GONNA IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
IN A MINUTE, THERE'S GONNA BE SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
SOMETHING LIKE THIS GOING ON.
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LITTLE PLOPSKI.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANKS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THANKS.
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED THANKS.
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
WHY ARE YOU GUYS OBSESSED WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE WITH ME TALKING ABOUT [BLEEP.]
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE TIME.
BECAUSE YOU [BLEEP.]
ALL THE TIME.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! TIME.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! I'M HUMAN.
WELL, SO DO HUMANS! I'M HUMAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I'M HUMAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS ALL RIGHT, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS OF Q.
THANKS, EVERYBODY, FOR COMING.
Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
COMING.
Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A Q KNOWS NOTHING OF FASHION.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
HE ALWAYS LOOKS LIKE A DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
ALL RIGHT.
DISHEVELED CRAZY PERSON.
ALL RIGHT.
WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW ALL RIGHT.
WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW STARTED, HUH? WHY DON'T WE GET THE SHOW STARTED, HUH? AND SO IT BEGINS.
AND SO IT BEGINS.
Together: "THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON"! Together: "THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON"! [ LAUGHTER .]
HAT ON"! [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS BIOTCH GOTS A HAT ON.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
AND I FEEL IT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, THANK YOU.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, HAVE A HAT.
THAT BIOTCH DID, IN FACT, HAVE A HAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HAVE A HAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
UH, LET'S -- LET'S SEE THE NEXT ALL RIGHT.
UH, LET'S -- LET'S SEE THE NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
THIS IS THE, UH HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THIS IS THE, UH HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY.
THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS -- THERE'S NO WAY TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO EXPLAIN THAT.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
THIS, UH -- UH, I LIKE TO CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
[ LAUGHTER .]
CALL IT SICKLY CHIC.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH! EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO OH! EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO USE THE BEDPAN.
EASY ACCESS IF HE'S GOT TO USE THE BEDPAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
USE THE BEDPAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU GOT THE -- [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU GOT THE -- THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK YOU GOT THE -- THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK THEY WENT AHEAD WITH THE BLACK EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK SICK.
EYES, TOO, SO YOU REALLY LOOK SICK.
YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! SICK.
YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE YOU'RE THE DESIGNER! YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
YOU'RE, LIKE, SURPRISED HE WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WENT WITH THE BLACK EYES.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
UH, ALL RIGHT.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
OH, MY GOD.
WELL, UH, NEXT MODEL.
OH, MY GOD.
YEP.
OH, MY GOD.
YEP.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
YEP.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
THERE, WE GOT IT.
THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? THAT'S A SEXY HOMICIDAL MANIAC.
OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE OH, DOESN'T SHE LOOK PRETTY? YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, YEAH, I THINK YOU GUYS CAN SEE THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, RIGHT? THIS FOR HALLOWEEN NEXT YEAR, RIGHT? YEAH.
RIGHT? YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YEAH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT, UH, NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT, UH, NEXT MODEL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
IT'S JUST A DELIVERY GUY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY! [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
I THINK THAT HE JUST -- [ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
I THINK THAT HE JUST -- I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST I THINK THAT HE JUST -- I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
I THINK HE WAS ACTUALLY JUST DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DELIVERING SOME FOOD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND THAT WAS SO MUCH FUN.
I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE AND ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING AROUND.
ALL THOSE COSTUMES WERE RUNNING AROUND.
IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF AROUND.
IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" IT WAS LIKE AN EPISODE OF "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" RIGHT, RIGHT! "THE MUPPET SHOW.
" RIGHT, RIGHT! IT WAS CRAZY.
RIGHT, RIGHT! IT WAS CRAZY.
NOW LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT A IT WAS CRAZY.
NOW LET'S TAKE ANOTHER LOOK AT A NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIP OF Q.
EXCUSE ME, SIR? EXCUSE ME.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
EXCUSE ME.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I'M SORRY TO BOTHER YOU.
I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL I'M IN A BIT OF A TIGHT SPOT.
I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL A I -- I, UH -- I HAVE TO CALL A BLACK RAPHAEL.
A BLACK RAPHAEL.
YOU KNOW, THE GUY, YOU KNOW, THE GUY, BLACK RAPHAEL? I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH BLACK RAPHAEL? I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND I GOT TO LET HIM KNOW, UH ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S ROCK HUDSON DIED, AND IT'S KIND OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
OF AN EMERGENCY BECAUSE HE'S BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE BEEN WAITING FOR THAT DAY.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE OH, GOD.
AND I LEFT MY PHONE OH, GOD.
I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH OH, GOD.
I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP I, UH -- I LEFT MY PHONE, UH I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP YOUR ASS AND TO THE LEFT, I I LEFT MY -- I LEFT MY PHONE UP YOUR ASS AND TO THE LEFT, I GUESS.
CAN I BORROW YOURS JUST TO MAKE A PHONE CALL? REAL QUICK -- TO BLACK RAPHAEL.
A PHONE CALL? REAL QUICK -- TO BLACK RAPHAEL.
HE'S WALKING AROUND THINKING HE'S WALKING AROUND THINKING LIBERACE'S STILL ALIVE! ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! LIBERACE'S STILL ALIVE! ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
ROCK HUDSON, NOT LIBERACE! OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, ROCK HUDSON'S DEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LIBERACE? [ LAUGHTER .]
LIBERACE? THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, LIBERACE? THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
THEY'RE BOTH DEAD, YOU KNOW, FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
I DON'T KNOW.
FLAMBOYANT GENTLEMEN.
I DON'T KNOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I DON'T KNOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY [ LAUGHTER .]
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
I CONSIDER ONE OF MY WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S WEAKNESSES MY BODY.
AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A AND I LOOK AT A MAN WHO'S CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
CHISELED, AND I'M LIKE -- I'M A LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT LITTLE BIT JEALOUS.
MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR MURR, WHEN YOU LOOKED AT THAT GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR [ LAUGHTER .]
GUY'S HEAD OF HAIR [ LAUGHTER .]
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEXT [ LAUGHTER .]
LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE NEXT CLIP.
Q, I WANT YOU TO TAKE YOUR BOOTS OFF AND PUT THEM IN SOMEONE'S CART.
BOOTS OFF AND PUT THEM IN SOMEONE'S CART.
[ LAUGHS .]
SOMEONE'S CART.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
WITHOUT THEM KNOWING.
[ LAUGHS .]
THERE YOU GO.
THERE YOU GO.
OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! YOU GOT THEM.
OH, MY GOD! OH, MY GOD! YOU GOT THEM.
SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT YOU GOT THEM.
SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE SHE PUT HER STUFF RIGHT NEXT TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE THEM.
TO YOUR BOOTS AND DIDN'T NOTICE THEM.
OH, HER HUSBAND'S THERE, TOO, THEM.
OH, HER HUSBAND'S THERE, TOO, NOW.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE'S POINTING IT OUT TO HER.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S POINTING IT OUT TO HER.
[ LAUGHS .]
Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND [ LAUGHS .]
Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" Q, WALK TO HER RIGHT NOW AND BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
BE LIKE, "ALL RIGHT, WISE GUY!" ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
COME ON.
ALL RIGHT, WISE GUYS.
COME ON.
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
COME ON.
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STOP STEALING MY BOOTS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHS .]
THAT'S THE THIRD TIME TODAY.
[ LAUGHS .]
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE [ LAUGHS .]
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE TWO.
WATCH YOUR BOOTS AROUND THESE TWO.
WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN TWO.
WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? WHY DON'T YOU JUST LAY DOWN ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? [ LAUGHTER .]
ON THE FLOOR RIGHT HERE? [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S NOT DEAD.
THAT'S IT.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S NOT DEAD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
HE'S NOT DEAD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
OH, MY GOD.
JUST TAKING A FACEDOWN NAP.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
OH, MY GOD.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
YOU LOOK DEAD.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
YOU LOOK LIKE A CHALK OUTLINE.
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS IS DISGUSTING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
PEOPLE ARE STARING.
[ LAUGHTER CONTINUES .]
PEOPLE ARE STARING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE PEOPLE ARE STARING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
ROLL OVER ON YOUR BACK, LIKE YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
YOU WERE JUST SLEEPING.
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
[ MOANS .]
JUST LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPING.
[ MOANS .]
ALL GOOD HERE.
[ MOANS .]
ALL GOOD HERE.
JUST CHILLIN'.
ALL GOOD HERE.
JUST CHILLIN'.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JUST CHILLIN'.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE [ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE THUMBS UP.
THAT'S ALL IT TAKES -- THE THUMBS UP.
YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
THUMBS UP.
YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE YOU'RE ALL GOOD.
YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS YOU CAN REALLY SEE THE DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS EPISODE.
DEVOLUTION OF ME THROUGHOUT THIS EPISODE.
I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU EPISODE.
I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, I WAS KIND OF CLEAN-CUT AND, YOU KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK KNOW, HAPPY IN THE BEGINNING, AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
AND TOWARDS THE END, I JUST LOOK LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT LIKE I'M HOMELESS.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT ME.
I THINK YOU GUYS ARE RIGHT ABOUT ME.
SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
ME.
SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT SELF-FULFILLING PROPHECY.
I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME I DIDN'T SEE IT BEFORE, BUT YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK YOU GUYS KEPT CALLING ME HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK HOMELESS.
HOMELESS, AND NOW I LOOK HOMELESS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HOMELESS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO THE INTERVENTION [ LAUGHTER .]
WELCOME TO THE INTERVENTION EPISODE OF "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WELL, GUYS, WE DID IT.
THERE IT IS -- THREE YEARS OF THERE IT IS -- THREE YEARS OF FUN.
FUN.
CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS.
CONGRATULATIONS, GUYS.
AND THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY AT AND THANK YOU TO EVERYBODY AT HOME WHO HAVE SUPPORTED US THE HOME WHO HAVE SUPPORTED US THE ENTIRE TIME.
ENTIRE TIME.
WE COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WE COULD NOT HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU.
WITHOUT YOU.
AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO AND WE'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO THE NEXT 300 YEARS.
THE NEXT 300 YEARS.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WELL, I'LL BE DEAD IN TWO.
WELL, I'LL BE DEAD IN TWO.
CHEERS, EVERYONE! CHEERS, EVERYONE! CHEERS!