Kim's Convenience (2016) s03e12 Episode Script

1 Janet.
Why you put chip back in the relax zone? Because I have no idea where or what a relax zone is.
Relax zone.
Important, huh.
Customer coming in from crazy city need to relax, then wants to buy.
- Right.
- See.
There's a destination zone.
Hmm? Why customer come in? Mostly cold drink.
I put back there so they have to look at everything else.
Also, that's where the coolers are.
Then, maybe they don't come in wanting bag of chip, but they leave with a chip, because now they is in impulse zone.
- Okay.
- [STORE BELL JINGLES.]
- Hi.
- Hi.
She walk very fast, huh.
No relax, just her destination.
But look out.
Here come impulse zone trap.
[CASH REGISTER DINGS.]
You interested in a bag of chip? Uh, no.
Just this drink.
Thanks.
Hmm.
I guess psychology doesn't always work.
[DOOR OPENS.]
- Wait for it.
- [DOOR CLOSES.]
Okay, I'm going upstairs.
Wait for it.
Wait for it.
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]
I'm feeling some pressure here.
Can I have a few minutes? Of course.
Terence's being a beast with Shannon's birthday card.
[JUNG.]
I had to sign in the bathroom stall.
Bold move.
Not really.
Terence sat in the stall next to me.
- I meant what you wrote.
- What? I know the whole Shan-Jung kiss thing happened a while ago, but you can't pretend that signing, "Love, Jung" isn't a move.
And a bold one.
I didn't sign, "Love, Jung.
" Uh, yeah, you did.
No.
I signed, "From Jung.
" Not according to my understanding of English.
[OMAR.]
Hey, how many "N's" in Shannon? Two.
S-H-A-N-N-O - There's three.
- Thanks.
Hey, do you mind if I take a look at that? Incoming! - Hey, guys.
- Hey.
I can make Nanaimo bar again this year.
That's no problem.
Oh, there goes my BMI.
After last year, I think my collar went up a size.
Uh, yeah.
I notice.
I was kidding.
Yeah.
Me, too.
Mr.
Kim.
Mrs.
Kim! [GREETING IN KOREAN.]
And this is for you.
Just a small anonymous donation for church roof repair.
Oh, my.
That's very generous.
Everyone has to do their part.
I give a big cheque, you ladies sell little cookies.
- Am I right? - [LAUGHS.]
Jimmy, we've talked about this.
Uh-oh.
Pastor Nina think I being sexy again.
It's sexist.
Just having little fun.
I forget how sensitive girls can be.
[CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY.]
Yeah.
Sometime.
Not girls, Jimmy.
Women.
I'm sorry.
I just can't wait for bake sale.
Well, good.
And all the sweet treat I'm gonna pick up.
[GRUNTS.]
Well, I'm gonna use the little boy room.
Sorry! Little man room.
- Oh.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE.]
[APPA GRUNTS.]
[APPA.]
Yeah.
You know what you baking this year? Hope you make Naimo bar again.
Last year you make Naimo bar so good.
So many taste test.
You want Na-naimo bar? You bake you own Na-naimo bar.
I don't know how to do baking.
And why you don't know how to do baking? Because I is And you is Woman just better at baking.
Oh, yeah? Is woman also better at cleaning bathtub and doing laundry? Or just excuse so you can do nothing? - Yobo - Don't you "Yobo" me.
Why you so upset? Because you and Jimmy Young make a joke about bake sale! [SCOFFS.]
Jimmy make a joke! I not say anything.
Exactly.
You just laugh.
[IMITATES LAUGHTER.]
And then he think he is right when he say "Am I right?" I not know what Jimmy thinking.
Why I get in trouble for what you think Jimmy thinking? You not getting in trouble.
But you're not getting Nanaimo bar either.
Unless you bake yourself! Okay! Fine.
I bake my own Naimo bar.
- Fine! And I drive.
- Ah! [CAR ENGINE STARTS.]
Oright, oright, oright.
Eh, eh Watch out for Jimmy car.
- Yeah, yeah.
I see.
- Careful.
Careful.
Don't tell me how to drive! There.
See? I hope you bake as good as I drive.
[CRASHING.]
Yeah.
About the same.
[GLASS CLATTERS.]
[JANET.]
And grab yogurt.
Chelsea's getting organic Greek from the Carrot.
Ugh, typical.
You eat most of it.
You should thank me.
I'm only trying to finish it before she gets her little doll hands on it and "Mmms" it up.
Or the way she says, "Knock knock," while she's knocking.
[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE.]
"Knock-knock.
Hey, Ger-bear! Let's cuddle, bum-bum?" Knock-knock.
[GERALD CLEARS THROAT.]
Hey, Chelsea.
You're early.
You know I like to watch the movie previews, bum-bum.
Right.
I just got to, um [STUTTERS.]
How long have you, uh, been here for? Exactly? Mmm, not long.
Why? Gerald was just saying super cute things about you.
Aw, babe.
Like what? Ah, how you eat yogurt.
Always sounds like you love it so much.
I do! [SQUEALS.]
Mmm! [GERALD AND JANET CHUCKLE.]
Hello.
Is everything okay? No.
Some idiot park in a fire lane.
My car! Then idiot leave and Mrs.
Kim scratch you car.
Oh, my God.
Is a just scratch.
You can barely see.
Okay.
Tell to me you insurance and we get all sort out.
[UMMA.]
Why you telling her what to do? Oh, someone have to take charge.
Oh, so, of course has to be man.
Well, doesn't have to be, but I take charge.
I can handle.
Yes.
I'm sure that we can figure this out.
You just lucky fire department not catch you in fire lane.
I say I take charge! Save your man-splaining for some man to 'splain to.
Well, the important thing is that no one got hurt.
Except my car, which was almost new.
Oh, well.
I'm so sorry.
That you park in fire lane.
But don't worry, everybody make mistake some time.
Yes, yes.
And those who make mistakes take responsibility for them, so I'm not worried.
As long as something gets done.
Yeah.
Maybe church help out.
Maybe.
Or someone else.
Yeah.
Okay, well, I'll leave you to think about that.
I'll also need you to move your car.
Okay.
Yeah.
Drive safe, Pastor Nina.
Pastor Nina? I don't think she hear me.
- [CAR ENGINE STARTS.]
- Uh, yeah.
There's hardly any room.
My cartoon took up more space than I thought.
Just sign on the back.
Hey, Terence.
I just need to take a quick look at Shannon's card.
Sorry! Not falling for that again.
You know you have pockets, right? - Falling for what? - Oh, let me think! A rude limerick with grammar and spelling mistakes attributed to me? Terence, I'm telling you, "cul de sac" does not mean what you think it means.
Don't make me call HR.
I just need the card.
Hey, what would you think if I signed a card to you saying, "Love, Jung"? I just signed a card that was in Terence's pants.
That's all I can really handle today.
- How it's going? - Good.
I hear yelling upstair.
And lots of crash and bang and crying.
Yeah.
I bake Gordon Ramsey style.
Lots of passion.
Sound like Nanaimo bar giving you hard time.
No.
Just, uh, make another batch.
Improve recipe.
Recipe already is perfect.
Maybe for you.
Good luck.
Second batch always is better.
Yeah.
Second batch.
Ha! And, uh, maybe you want me make extra batch for Pastor Nina? - Why? - So she don't feel so bad about scratch on car that you make.
On her almost new car.
What you talking? I already deal with car problem.
She park in fire lane.
It's accident.
She say so herself.
I think she try to say something else.
- What? - I not speak for her.
Good.
You learning.
These quizzes are so dumb.
It's like, "Yeah.
I like this style of T-shirt, so that means I'm an introvert.
" You are an introvert! That was a bad example.
I wish I could convince Ger to take a quiz.
I feel like he needs to get in touch with himself, you know? - [CELL PHONE VIBRATES.]
- Oh! Gerald wants to know if you're doing anything Friday? There's an oyster place we want to check out.
Yeah, not really an oyster girl.
- But they're a buck-a-shuck.
- Oh.
Maybe then.
I mean, I might just come for a drink and have, like, one or two.
Sure.
'Cause they're so filling.
- [CELL PHONE BUZZES.]
- [CHELSEA GIGGLES.]
What's so funny? Gerald just sent me the sunglasses emoji.
It gets me every time.
- [CELL PHONE CONTINUES BUZZING.]
- [GIGGLING.]
Well, I got class.
[CELL PHONE BUZZING.]
[TOILET FLUSHING.]
[GERALD CHUCKLES.]
[TAP RUNNING.]
Oh! Hey, Gerald.
Just in the kitchen.
Washing a mug.
I see that.
- Hey, babe.
- Hey.
- I gotta go.
- Oh, bye.
- What? - [DOOR OPENS AND SHUTS.]
She washed her mug.
That's, like, never happened.
No more good table left.
Maybe set up over there, huh? Ah! Mr.
and Mrs.
Kim.
You're late! Yeah.
Mrs.
Kim take long time to park.
Ah! Well, it's better to be safe than sorry.
We here now.
Where should we put? I'll leave it up to you.
You always seem to know exactly what you want.
- Uh-oh.
- What? Pastor Nina mad at you.
Not mad.
Just, uh busy serious.
Right.
Um Uh, Pastor Nina.
Sorry, but, uh, the table is, uh, kind of broken.
Oh, dear! I guess someone damaged it, but didn't feel it was their responsibility to fix it.
Who would do something like that? I don't know.
Maybe caretaker? Oh, of course.
Yes! Because it's a church table, so I guess the church should fix it.
I just looking to help with bake sale.
Oh, you want to help? She wants to help! She wants to help.
She wants to help.
This is because of a car scratch.
It wasn't just a scratch! You wrecked my car and you didn't even offer to help pay for it.
But why you don't say something? Because I was implying it passively, like a normal person.
Huh.
Yo, O-mars-bar! Hit it.
Love you, man.
Thanks, Jung.
Appreciate it.
Love you, too.
Nice purse.
Loving it.
[CHUCKLES.]
Hope these jokesters aren't bothering you.
No.
This man just made my day.
Just spreading the love.
Like always.
To everyone.
Cause it's my thing, you know? Great.
Hey, Stace.
Love ya.
We talked about this.
Um, can I chat with you for a sec? - Love to.
- Mmm-hmm.
So, I'm thinking you should maybe slow down the love train here.
Why? Because you can't tell people you love them if you don't love them.
Like, love-love them.
Come on, it's no big deal.
Saying it, not saying it.
It's all the same.
I think it is a big deal.
Right.
Got it.
Then we're agreed.
- Mos def.
- Ooh! You can't say that either, but that's a story for another day.
Wow! Mrs.
Kim really went all out.
These look great.
- [CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY.]
Well - Mmm! These are fantastic.
- Yeah? - Mmm! What's your wife's secret? Uh, I think her secret is, uh Me.
I make.
Well, these are delicious.
Trick is each layer has to complete cool before adding next.
I will have to remember that.
Okay.
See you.
So many sweet things to look at.
And the baked goods, too.
[LAUGHS.]
Jimmy, it's, uh, not so good doing like you doing.
Come on! It's just the guys talking.
No harm done.
Actual, it's, uh, not just talking and you have to stop.
Whoa! [IMITATES WHIP LASHING.]
Sorry! Janice wanted to hear how you made them.
Mr.
Kim, you baked these? Yeah.
I make.
Well, tell your husband they're delicious.
[BOTH LAUGH.]
I don't get.
Because you're like the wife.
You baking, like a woman.
[CHUCKLES.]
But I'm a husband.
But you baking, like woman, so, it's funny.
You get it, right? Maybe you is confused, because you don't have a wife.
[LAUGHS.]
[STORE BELL JINGLES.]
[GERALD.]
If I smell weird it's because a pack of teenagers surrounded me on the streetcar.
Do you think I'm cheap? What? Not wanting to spend money.
Classic Janey.
[GERALD LAUGHS AWKWARDLY.]
[SPEAKS FRENCH.]
I see by your nervous French I've struck a nerve.
Non.
I mean, no.
Okay.
I saw your text to Chelsea venting about me.
You hacked me? It was all over her laptop.
I've told her to disable those alerts.
It's actually a pet peeve of mine.
You know, sort of like how she always puts her toothpaste, like, right on her teeth.
No.
We are not talking about her right now.
We are talking about you and her talking about me.
I'm part of a couple now.
I don't have any choice but to vent about you being cheap.
How would you like it if I vented with Chelsea about you? [CHUCKLES.]
Please.
You and Chelsea aren't venting friends.
You're not even "share a bag of chips" friends.
We've shared chips.
Baked, veggie, expensive chips that I bought with my own money.
Maybe you want to think about that the next time you and Chelsea jam on Janet.
- Thank you very much for coming.
- [UMMA.]
Pastor Nina? Pastor Nina.
Can you excuse me? Thank you.
I'm sorry about the scratch car not helping fix.
I feel terrible.
Oh, I don't feel so great either.
Though it could be the macaroons, or the macarons.
I couldn't remember which was which, so I went for both.
I just want us to stop fighting.
I pay for car repair.
No! It's fine.
I shouldn't have parked there and I should have been more clear about how I felt.
Yeah.
Because sometimes it's good to get mad.
Note taken.
But in the interest of avoiding any lingering guilt, I will pay for the damages.
No, no, no.
I pay.
Otherwise you never stop reminding me how I scratch car.
And you will never let the "fire lane" go.
- But you did park in - [JIMMY.]
Uh-oh.
Cat fight in old hen house.
Am I right? Jimmy, please.
Claws out.
Rawrr! Rawrr! Jimmy, enough! You can take your very generous cheque for the roof and shove it! - Yeah! See? You tell him! - What? No.
You can keep the cheque.
Oh, and don't follow me.
You do not want to be on the other side of my sugar crash.
Your friend.
Jung.
Nailed it.
Okay.
Omar, you're next.
Stacie, have you seen Shannon's birthday card? Omar's signing it.
I knew I should have kept it in my pants.
This is a new card.
What happened to the old card? Uh, nobody wanted to touch it.
[SIGHS.]
But my Handy Gang cartoon took hours.
Omar's ears were murder.
She's coming.
Stall her.
Kimchee didn't sign it.
Here, I'll sign it for him.
- Shannon! Hi.
- Hi.
- What's wrong? - Nothing.
Um But, now that you're here I just want to tell you how awesome I think you are.
Aw.
Thanks.
Was there more? I think you're great and I like working with you a lot [ALL.]
Surprise! - Happy Birthday! - [SQUEALS.]
Guys! Oh Okay.
I wish I may, I wish I might I wish I may - The candles are melting.
- Got it.
[ALL.]
Yay! [APPA.]
And you change.
Okay.
See you.
Yobo, I'm so proud of you.
Yeah.
I sell out! No.
Mrs.
Ham tell me you yell at Jimmy.
Ah.
He need new material.
Always joke about the woman.
Men is funny, too.
Yeah.
Have to be equal.
[UMMA SIGHS.]
So, you make up with Pastor Nina? Yeah.
I talk to her.
Tell her I feel bad and agree to pay half damage.
What? With insurance we don't have to pay, huh.
I can get for free.
Yeah.
And I can make Nanaimo bar with less than 60 egg.
[APPA.]
Uh, maybe.
You want to drive? [UMMA.]
No.
I get my driver to do.
I am feminist! Not millionaire.
Hey.
What is it? Today, Kimchee stopped me to tell me how awesome I was, and then he wrote, "Love, Kimchee," on my card.
- Oh.
- It's kind of weird, right? Maybe.
Have I been sending out signals? 'Cause I didn't mean to.
I get that Time's Up.
Actually, I'm the one that wrote "Love.
" I signed it for him.
Oh.
Did he not want to sign it? No.
We all had to sign another card after I ripped up the first card.
Okay why? Because I wrote, "Love, Jung" on the first card.
But I didn't do it on purpose, because I obviously don't love you.
I mean, I like you.
As a friend.
But you wrote "love.
" I know.
Um But "love" like I love finding money in old clothing.
Right.
Or, like a seat becomes available on a crowded bus.
I love that.
I love you like I love that.
- [KNOCK ON DOOR.]
- Sorry to interrupt.
This just came for you.
Aw! "For my special Shanns.
From Alejandro.
" Oh, look! It's a milk frother.
Now I'll have two.
[BOTH CHUCKLE.]
[POP MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO.]
[CHELSEA.]
So fun.
Just thought as roomies we should hang sometimes.
Just the two of us.
Gal pals! Gal pals! [LAUGHS.]
Mmm.
Tasty cab sav, by the way.
LCBO Vintage.
It has a certain je ne sais quoi.
Ah! French for yummy! Funny you should say that.
Ever notice when Gerald speaks French? Ugh.
He always does that, and it's so hot.
He could totally rock a Parisian artist vibe.
It would definitely be a step up from looking like a stagehand.
Or a black light puppeteer.
Exactly! Those guys are so cool.
Are they? So, you know how when two people are close, they might share thoughts that other friends don't need to know about? Uh-huh.
So if we were to share something, other people, like say, Gerald, might not need to know.
Okay.
I mean, we all wanna get something off our chest, right? Don't you feel that sometimes? I'm open.
No judgment here.
So if there's something you're thinking, just go with it and Whoa.
What's happening? I don't know.
Just got caught up in the moment, I guess.
With the wine and the sharing and the French.
Right.
Okay.
Like you say, this can be our little secret thing.
Yeah.
That we don't continue to do.
Sure.
- Seriously.
- Mmm-hmm.
- Seriously! - Mmm-hmm.
Hey! Did you see? Chelsea bought a black light.
Black lights can be a lot of fun.
Good for her.
Oh, come on.
Chelsea won't deal the dirt about you, either.
She won't even sing the Janet Janet Tea Bag song.
- The what? - Hey, Jans.
Crazy night last night, huh? [GERALD.]
What did you guys do? Nothing.
Just drank some wine, had chips.
Yeah, that's it.
Wink.
- What? - Nothing.
[WHISPERS.]
Wink.
[CHELSEA SINGING.]
Janet, Janet Tea bag song Spreads her tea bags All day long [GERALD.]
So you guys vented about me? Well, what did you talk about? Was it about how I use three towels when I shower? Or the rap I'm writing? No.
We You use three towels? Yeah.
One for each section.
Well, we didn't talk about you.
And, if we did, I wouldn't tell you.
Fine.
So, if there was a kiss last night, I mean, that's how we'd deal with it? Oh, my God.
[CHELSEA LAUGHS.]
[CHELSEA.]
Sorry, Janet! [THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]