Offspring (2010) s03e12 Episode Script

How's he going? He's still not staying warm on his own.
That's why he has to stay in the box.
OK.
A toast to the Paddy-man.
Wishing you great success at the Ainsworth.
I just want to say how much I've loved working with you all.
I was just trying to participate.
I really think you should move in.
I want Ray to have a sibling, but I want it to be a full sibling.
The same parents.
Hi.
Rosanna.
So great to meet you finally, 'cause I've heard so much.
Me too.
Look at this one.
I'll take that.
Today was a mistake.
It was a mistake, and I wish it had never happened.
Oh, God.
No.
It's probably late period.
A late period's a late period.
No need to jump to conclusions.
Of course it's not just a late period, it's a late period coupled with an afternoon of thoughtless sex.
Thoughtless, unforgettable sex.
Aha! The 'just in case' emergency condom.
Where was that when you needed it? It was right there in my wallet.
Didn't I teach you anything? Well, if you're talking about the time you sat us all down and demonstrated how to put a condom on a banana Contraception is fairly easy.
Well, I might just be late.
I'm not definitely pregnant.
You know the signs.
Nausea, bleeding gums, metallic taste in the mouth.
I don't have any of those.
Sore breasts? Yes, but that could also be a sign of being premenstrual.
Sensitivity to smell? Nope.
Anxiety, exhaustion? I'm always anxious and exhausted.
Unprotected sex.
Shut up.
You're just a voice in my head.
And I'll be there till your dying day.
You were doing so well.
Patrick, the break-up, everything was just starting to be OK and now here he is, Patrick Reid, unresolved in a whole new way.
Hello.
Darling, it's just hit me what tomorrow is.
Shit.
Double shit.
Your 34th birthday! Oh.
My 35th birthday, actually.
Yeah, well that's even better.
Well, I don't want any fuss.
No.
You say that every year, but I mean 35! Well! It's a milestone.
We should make it special.
No, I I've just got so much on.
We need to just get together and celebrate with a big bang.
What kind of bang? You just leave it all to me.
Don't worry about a thing, OK? Dad? Birthday, possible pregnancy to a man you're not in any kind of relationship with No.
Too much.
Oh, Nina, you can faff around and freak yourself out or you can go and find out for sure.
Hey.
How's Alfie doing? Oh, he's going great guns.
Off the critical list.
Right now I'm just organising Nina's birthday for tomorrow.
Darcy, I have a confession.
You know, ever since I've been thinking about having another baby, I've been monitoring my fertility.
Oh.
Today would be a good day for us to start trying.
Oh.
Today.
Today.
Or if you prefer next No, no, um No time like the present.
Well, I'll get a sitter for Ray.
Good.
Good, good, good, good.
Good.
No-one needs to know.
Clean in, clean out.
Ghost ninja.
What are you doing here? You're not on till tonight.
Nina's here! No, I'm not.
I'm just Hey, Nina.
Yep.
Alibi.
Think fast.
I'm just here to pick up some notes.
Some research notes on an article I'm writing.
OK.
Yeah.
It's about the role of endocrine factors in the ovarian surface epithelium.
The process of ovulation is Whatever you sprayed yourself with this morning, it's too much.
Oh.
Sorry.
It's OK.
Don't worry about it.
Hey, I need your help.
What for? I don't know how to say this, so I'll just say it.
Darcy and I are going to try for another baby.
Oh! Well! That's that's nice news.
Wow.
It's potentially apocalyptic.
I mean, your mum's head might explode, brains go all over the wall, so I thought this time it would be better to tell her in advance.
Mmm.
So, I was wondering Nope, nope, nope.
Just introduce the idea to her.
Get her used to it.
No way.
Nina, I am always breaking up your family, and God knows how she does it, but she bounces back and she forgives me, but my luck is running out.
Please.
Alright, I'll introduce the idea, but that's all.
Thank you.
I owe you one.
Robson Wing! Uh, hi, Kim.
It's Patrick.
It's Nina.
Oh, sorry.
I didn't recognise your voice.
It's fine.
How are you? Be cheerful.
Be aggressively cheerful.
I'm great! Just peachy.
Peachy? What's inspired that? Uh, well, you know it's a great day.
There's a calendar on the wall Wonderful.
Are you OK? Yep.
Because you sound like you're overcompensating.
Oh, no.
What? Oh.
Well, can't someone be great without? Oh, is this about your birthday tomorrow? Yes.
Yes my birthday.
I love my birthday.
And there's there's a big thing happening and everyone's invited.
Are you inviting me? What? I'm not asking to be invited Oh, I shouldn't have mentioned it.
I'm sorry, why are you calling? Oh, I'm after Clegg.
Um, is he there? It's about a squash game.
That's why I'm calling.
Hello? Hi.
What's wrong? Nothing! I'm just putting you through.
I'll spend the day with Alfie.
No, Mum, we want to be there.
No, no, no, come on.
He's off the critical list.
He'll be coming home in a few weeks.
It's time to start getting ready for that.
It just doesn't feel right to leave him for so long.
Take the day.
Regroup.
We could swing past your place and get the bed, at least.
Do you both good.
Right! Easy.
Hey, Nina.
What are you doing?! Drop it.
I know this looks bad.
Who's the father? What? No.
No, no, no, Cherie, when you're wrong, you're so wrong.
Oh, OK.
Who's the father? No, that that's not what this is.
Trying to take your own blood.
I My period's late.
And I'm just I'm not in any way sure.
I just thought if I do this it'll Yeah, I totally get it.
Who's the father? Well, if there was one, hypothetically Adam? No! Patrick.
Mmm.
Didn't your mother teach you Yes, my mother taught me.
Are you gonna help me? Yeah, yeah.
Neens, you're an obstetrician.
I mean, more than that.
You spend days deciding what colour spatula to get.
An unplanned pregnancy is so un-Nina-like.
It's What is your point? My point is you poor darling.
Well, that's We're not sure, so Well, we better barricade the door.
Anyone can come in.
Cherie, can I just have a quick word with you? Come in, lean against the door.
Who's the father? What? Whose sperm are we talking about? Patrick.
Oh, dear.
He's not going to welcome the news he's about to become a father.
He's not about to become a father.
Am I missing something? What? No.
It's a test A test, because there's uncertainty.
Contraceptive failure.
No, it's not exactly a failure.
Wild bareback sex.
Eugh.
Didn't your mother teach you about Yes, my mother taught me, my father taught me, my high school PE class taught me, Grim Reaper ads and seven years of medical training taught me.
So, it was deliberate, then.
No! OK.
Here we go.
Right.
Please, please, this is very, very intensely sensitive.
Well, you can't have that tested here.
Why not? Well, have you ever been down to the pathology lab? No.
Vicious, petty, gossipy.
He's right, they're horrible.
They know, everyone's gonna know.
Well, I'll have to go somewhere else.
Right.
Please, please do not tell anyone.
We won't.
Cherie, could I just have a quick One minute.
Nina! I'll see you later.
First, come with me.
Where? You'll see.
Can we please not do this? No! Because you can't just say something like that and then walk away from me.
"I'm not pulling out of the tour with Rosanna.
" Well, I'm not.
I didn't ask you to.
Did you hear me ask you? Billie, it's completely obvious you don't want me to go on this tour.
OK, there's a vibe going on, alright? The two of you are vibing.
I know vibing when I see it, and tonight you're going to be on a plane with her, and then you're going to be in a hotel together vibing.
"Oh, here, let's go over some music.
" "Here, have a puppy.
" Oh, the puppy! Are we ever going to get past Dad.
Dad, I can't talk right now.
Sorry, love.
Look, I just wanted your input on Nina's birthday for tomorrow.
What? Hang on.
Hey, we're not finished! Nothing kooky for Nina's birthday, OK? What makes you say it would be anything Because you always try and do some big thing with ponies, Dad, and it always turns to shit.
She's turning 35! Every time you do something for Nina's birthday, marriages break up, someone gets arrested, something explodes and Jimmy ends up being rushed to hospital.
It's not always Jimmy.
OK, just Nina's birthday, think simple and elegant.
Say the words.
Simple and elegant.
Lunch at a nice restaurant.
Say it.
Lunch at a nice restaurant.
OK, I've gotta go.
Mick's tried to end our conversation by watering the Japanese maple.
It's a power play.
I have to counterattack.
How? I'm gonna check his phone for incriminating messages.
Oh, Billie.
Bye.
I don't really feel like it.
It's not really a good time, Cherie.
I don't want to.
I need you to come right here.
Oh, hello, darling! Hi, Mum.
Ah, changing of the guard.
Your mother's got the next shift.
Oh.
Billie thought a nice lunch for your birthday.
Simple and elegant.
Good.
Of course, if it was up to me I'd be Perhaps now would be a good time to Good time for what? Is something wrong, Nina? Shall we sit down for a moment? Mum sometimes it would would if you would would you how would you feel if Oh, God, you're pregnant.
What? No, no.
At least, are you, Nina? No.
Uh, but Dad and Cherie have something they'd like to say.
Oh.
That's it.
That's the introduction.
Take it away, Cherie.
I would like a sibling for Ray.
Mmph Oh, uh yeah.
We both would.
I wanted to run the idea past you, so it's not an ambush.
Nina, Cherie would you give us a moment? It's my idea to have another baby.
Thanks.
I just want to talk to Darcy.
That went well, don't you think? Another baby? Thank you for the advance notice this time.
Well, uh you seem to be taking it better than I thought you might.
I'm seeing Phillip Noonan.
"Seeing" meaning? Rooting.
Nina doesn't know yet.
We'll tell her when the time's right.
I'm telling you in the interest of full disclosure, since you were kind enough to So how long? A few weeks.
Darcy? II thought we were telling each other things.
Can I just say I am disappointed? I asked for this not to happen.
Oh, come on.
Come on, mate.
You're gonna be late.
Whoa! I'm under attack! Go, go, go.
Go, go.
You OK? I'm fine.
Why? You don't look fine.
It's nothing.
I got our itinerary.
Flight We've got to be at the airport at 8:00.
Yep.
Mick, uh, this TV show in Sydney is great.
But I'm going to find someone else for the tour.
What? It's just getting messy.
It's putting stress on your marriage.
I can handle it.
II will handle it.
Seriously, if you go on this tour I want to go.
It's not about wanting, you know it's about the long run, and you know, it's just a tour and I don't think you should put your marriage at risk for it.
I'm not! I've spoken to Laura and she's, um she's going to take over on keys.
You You're firing me? It's for the best.
Right, well I've gotta get some air.
I regret to say that I won't be able to play squash after all.
I regret to say that I won't be able to play squash with you after all.
I regret to say.
Regret to say.
Hello.
Ah.
I regret to say that I won't be able to play squash with you today after all.
How come? Uh, the thing is uh No.
Uh What? Ah.
I have come into the possession of some information and, uh were we to see each other, honesty would impel me to impart.
And as this information was garnered somewhat sideways, and I myself have taken a vow of silence, the normal code of discretion forces me to remain mute.
So, I can't see you.
It's about Nina, isn't it? Oh uh Martin Clegg.
Come for a game.
I promise I'll respect your silence.
We won't talk, we'll just play.
Ollie! Hello.
I want Mick, not you.
Oh, well, he's not here right now.
What do you want him for? Is it about the puppy? I'm sorry about that.
It was just it was a bit of a surprise, but I didn't want him to give it back to you.
What Shouldn't you be at school? What's the deal? Are you wagging? Well, maybe maybe I should call the police and dob you in.
Would you like that? OK, well, I'm calling them.
It's ringing.
Two rings.
Hello.
Is that the police? Yeah, it's Billie Proudman here.
Yes, very well, thank you, except I'm calling to inform you that there's a little scamp that's run away from school.
His name? If you're gonna lie, at least lie well.
I am actually on the phone to the police right now.
Are you gonna talk to me? OK, sorry, Officer.
It was actually a false alarm.
Yeah, OK.
Thank you.
Alright, if you want Mick, I will give you Mick.
He didn't answer.
Oh.
Really? Sorry.
Well, are you gonna go to school now? No.
What? It puts me in a spot - if something happens to you and I've left you on your own, then it's my fault.
I'll drive you home.
Yes, I will.
Come on.
I do not accept being fired.
Mick, I can't talk about this now, I'm sorry.
Billie and I are strong enough to take this.
No, I can't talk about Don't kick me off the team when we're just about to do something! Mick, I can't talk about this now.
Ollie he didn't show up to school.
Shit.
He's wagged before.
He did this when his dad and I broke up.
Lets things get to him.
Where are my keys?! Oh.
Let me help.
Thanks.
He's a smart kid, but I don't want my 10-year-old roaming the streets.
She's not home.
You got a key? Nope.
OK, what's your mum's number? What is it? If you're gonna lie, at least lie well.
So, you wag a bit, do you? Sometimes.
So, what's the usual? Skate bowl? Sometimes.
Mum picks me up from school, so I have to be there at the end of the day.
OK, I've got an open for inspection, so you can hang with me.
We'll we'll keep trying Mick, but if that doesn't work out, I'll get you to school by home time.
Come on.
Mick, it's me.
Again.
I'm still with Ollie.
Call me when you get this.
You don't have kids.
That's right.
Hi.
Feel free to explore.
How come? Um maybe one day.
Is it because you can't? That's that's a big question.
Hi! Hi.
Mick said not everyone can.
You know how some things are embarrassing to talk about? OK, this is one of those things.
Is it like when you have a dog and you get it desexed? II know this is unusual.
I can assure you this is my blood.
I just didn't know what else to do.
I'll send it to the pathology lab I use.
Very discreet.
Thank you.
Should know the results by tomorrow.
OK.
I'm chuffed uh, no.
No, that's the wrong word.
Honoured to be able to help.
Oh.
Please don't tell anyone.
It's confidential.
Thanks.
At the risk of seeming nosy Ah.
Patrick and I had a moment of weakness.
Thoughtlessness.
Have you thought about what you'll do if the results come back positive? Patrick doesn't want to have children.
I don't want to force him.
It wasn't planned.
But what do you want to do? I don't know.
I don't know.
Can't even get my mind around it.
Everything's tied together.
Patrick and I a baby? I always imagined having a child with a partner not an ex-partner.
I don't know what to feel.
If if you could go back would you have liked Mum to tell you that she was pregnant with me? Very much.
Patrick? No.
No point till results come back.
Hi, Billie.
Neens! Where are you right now? On my way home.
Good.
To sleep, Billie.
I'm on late shift tonight.
No, no.
I can't get hold of Mick.
I've got this kid with me.
I have to do something with him.
I'm on my way to yours.
I'll see you in 10.
But There we go.
Alright, get dressed.
I am dressed.
No, dressed like you're going out.
Why? Because I'm taking you out.
So, it's safe to say that one year ago neither of us thought that we'd be parents.
True.
And you would not have picked me to be the father of your child.
True.
So, why did you? I didn't decide, it was an accident.
Well, you decided to keep it.
I just knew I wanted to have it.
And you are good looking and good breeding stock.
And you have a good heart.
And I thought that you'd let me be who I want to be and let me raise the child my way.
Do you think that's changed? No.
So, um anyway What's this? Don't freak out, it's nothing fancy.
It was meant to be for when Alfie was born, but then he came early and there hasn't been the right moment.
It symbolises our shared parenthood.
Plus, I I thought it would look good on you.
Is this romance? No.
No, it's undefined.
You're too wound up.
I am in extreme discomfort.
Because of that Nina thing you're not talking about.
I spoke to her this morning.
She seemed 'up'.
I thought she was anxious.
I've been calling her, but she's screening me.
I admire your strength of character.
Yes.
I mean, you're concerned for her.
Lord knows I would be for any friend faced with such a situation.
The test alone Mmph! What test? ARGH! What's Nina being tested for? Mmmmph.
Is she sick? Mmmph! You promised to respect me! Martin, is Nina sick? Oh! Here we are.
Ollie, you remember Nina, don't you? Hi, Ollie.
Hi.
Have you got a PlayStation? Oh, no.
Sorry.
Can I go to the toilet? Yeah, sure, it's just right through there.
Tell me you haven't kidnapped that child.
No.
He's a little bit in love with me.
Shouldn't he be at school? Well, he came over to our place to see Mick, but Mick's gone AWOL and he won't answer my calls.
What? Don't.
Ow.
Billie, stop it.
Stop it! What are you doing? Stop it.
Billie, stop it.
Stop! Are are you? I'm not sure.
I'm I'm late, and Patrick Patrick and I did it.
It's not definite, I'm just trying to stay calm and walk in a straight line until I've got the results.
That's so unfair.
Sorry.
I'm I'm sorry.
Um Billie, please.
I need you right now.
I don't know what to do.
Ollie, are you ready? We're going.
Is she having a baby? Come on.
I know you must be so confused right now, and I so want to be there for you and be happy for you, but I can't.
I can't.
OK.
Let's go.
Oh, Patrick.
Martin, there's somewhere I'm meant to be.
This will only take a minute.
No, I have to.
Cherie.
You've been avoiding me all day, true or false? True.
And you've made it clear you want Darcy Proudman to sire a sibling for young Ray.
Also true.
I've offered myself to you in various ways, but you have rejected my sperm both literally and figuratively.
Nothing personal.
Marry me.
Get fucked! Did you enjoy that? Yes.
Yes, I did.
Marry me.
Your timing's terrible.
I have to go.
Chin-chin.
Up ya bum.
Ah! Music.
Ah, yes.
Yeah.
Atmosphere.
Sorry.
Wrong wrong track.
Wrong.
Ah, remember this? Oh, yep.
Oh! And, um, I downloaded an app.
Oh? Ocean sounds.
I thought it might help recapture the mood of the cruise.
Oh.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I'm just nervous, I'm nervous.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
I know.
I am too.
OK.
Good, good, OK.
Kiss me.
Oh, God.
What? How did we make this happen the first time? Ah.
Martin asked me to marry him.
Oh! So, what did you say? I told him to get fucked.
I mean, I thought it was a stunt - a reaction because of you and me, but he asked me to spend the rest of my life with him.
The man adores me.
Oh.
Whoa! Yeah! Stage two! OK, it's just in here.
Just here? Yep.
Right, so this is near where your mum picks you up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
OK, well see ya.
Bye.
Hey Why why did you come to our place this morning? Looking for Mick.
Yeah.
Why? To ask him to still come on tour.
Yeah, but he is going on tour.
Not anymore.
Mum said.
How come? 'Cause of you.
OK.
Bye.
See ya.
Ugh.
Oh! Hi.
I know you're in there.
Prize for persistence.
What's going on? Nothing.
Then why aren't you answering your phone? Oh, look, I'm fine! I just didn't feel like talking.
Are you sick? Nno.
Then what? I know something's going on, Nina.
I spoke to Martin.
Hang on.
Hi.
Um I'm sorry, I've gotta work and I need to sleep.
What's wrong? Nothing.
I'm fine.
I Please don't worry.
Well, I am worried about you, OK? You're having tests.
What tests? Well, I Just tell me.
Are you pregnant? Look, if you are is it mine? Thanks, Patrick.
I had to ask.
Hi, Mum.
Oh, God.
Something's happened.
Can you please come to the hospital? It's the baby! What? What has happened? I don't know.
They rushed him away.
It's something terrible! Please come! OK, I'm going to be right there.
I have to go - there's an emergency with the baby.
What is it? I don't know.
Well, I'll take you.
No.
Nina, really.
Really.
Oh, where's Jimmy and Zara? They're on their way.
His temperature he started throwing up.
It all happened very fast.
I was just sitting I was just sitting! Oh, Mum, it's not your fault! It's not your fault.
We should never have left him alone! We should have been here! It sounds like he's developed an infection.
It's no-one's fault.
Well, where is he? They've taken him for tests.
Where? Come with me.
I'll explain.
But I need to see him! Can we be with him? I'm sorry.
You're going to have to wait.
Just come and sit down.
Where is he? Where's Alfie? They've taken him to have some tests.
We just have to wait.
Oh, I need to see him.
I work here! Just please, just take me to him! Why won't you just let me be there?! Zara wants a minute.
Where is What the fuck, Mick? What the fuck yourself, Billie.
Where have you been all day? Well, I spent most of it looking for Ollie, who it turns out was with you.
Well, why didn't you answer your phone? Oh, I don't know - maybe it's because I didn't have it because my wife hid it under a pillow.
If you hadn't been Save it.
II don't want to hear it.
Could you just get here? Where? Here where? The hospital.
It's Alfie.
He's sick.
They're doing tests on him now.
Is Jimmy there? Can I speak to him? Put him on.
Hey.
It's Mick.
Hey.
Hey, Jimmy.
What what's going on? There was a spike in his temperature and then then he threw up.
We don't know anything.
That's it.
I'm cancelling my trip to Sydney.
I'm coming in.
No, no, Mick.
You should go.
You should go.
Fuck that, it's just a TV spot.
I'm coming in.
No, no, there's nothing you can do.
Go to Sydney.
Really.
Hey, it's me.
Mick Mick's not going on that tour anymore.
Oh.
And I'm glad.
I'm glad he's not going.
Jimmy.
Can you come? Yeah, sure.
Is that an X-ray? It's an MR image.
They're they're pretty they think Alfie has encephalitis.
Oh, God.
What's that? It's inflammation of the tissues of the brain.
So, it's serious.
It's incredibly serious.
They're gonna start by bringing his temperature down.
That's the first thing they're going to do.
Come here.
Come here, come here.
Come here.
What what do we do now? There's nothing we can do except wait.
Hello.
Alfie's being treated for encephalitis.
I thought you'd like to know.
Yeah.
Thanks.
Uh, Jimmy and Zara? Shocked.
Terrified.
We're all here.
It's going to be a long night.
Yeah.
Patrick I was avoiding you today.
You were right.
Because I don't know if I'm pregnant or not.
But if I am, it's definitely yours.
I'm going to go and be with my family.