The Mentalist s03e12 Episode Script

It's funny, isn't it? Dead cars are quite beautiful in their way - whereas dead people, not so much.
- Huh? If we were cars, this place would be an horrific charnel house.
- Ugh.
It's too early for philosophy.
- Never too early.
- Hey, Cho.
- Hey, boss.
He's over this way.
Hey, we've got an unidentified female, somewhere in her late teens, early 20s.
Oh, wow.
A little notice would have been nice.
Oh.
Be grateful it's wintertime.
It could be a lot worse.
She was bludgeoned around her left temple.
There's serious trauma to the back of her head.
Somebody wanted her dead.
How long? From the decomposition of the body, probably been here at least a week.
Is that the guy who found her? Came across the victim when he was combing through the van.
Looks like somebody took something off her after she was already here.
A watch or bracelet, I'm guessing.
Left the earrings.
Found a set of tracks over there.
It's a salvage yard.
There have to be lots of tracks.
It's a long shot, but there weren't many.
And these look pretty fresh.
- Smells like transmission fluid.
- I'll let Forensics run some tests.
A vehicle with a leaking transmission couldn't have gone far without service.
- Hey, what's his name? - Franklin.
- Cool it, boy.
- May I? I have a way with dogs.
Hi, Franklin.
How are you? Come here.
Are you a good boy? Good boy.
- You said you had a way with dogs.
- He wanted freedom.
Franklin.
Heel.
Keep up, Lisbon.
Franklin! What's that? Franklin, come.
Franklin, come here.
Get out of there, Franklin.
- Aah! It's a foot.
- Oh! Another body.
Are you done? What do you say, Franklin? Are we done yet? Huh? We done? Cadaver dogs didn't find any more bodies, did they? Thankfully, no.
Test confirmed there was transmission fluid in that track at the scene.
The tire pattern only fits a few van models.
I'm checking if vehicles fitting the description were turned in with transmission problems.
All right.
Cho, you mind helping him out? - Is there a problem here? - No.
- No, ma'am.
- Great.
I see a name.
Did we ID the victims? Only on one.
Got a hit on her prints.
It's for the second victim you found.
Her name was Valerie Bestin.
No next of kin.
Arrested four years ago after hitting a homeless man while driving drunk.
Time of death within the last 24 hours.
Bestin was bludgeoned, the same as the first victim.
- What about an ID on the other victim? - Her prints haven't come up.
The M.
E.
pegs her as Latina, early 20s.
Do a search of the missing persons database.
Maybe we'll get lucky.
Yes, ma'am.
We've got two victims.
One Caucasian, the other probably Latina.
A 10-year age gap between them.
Judging by their clothes, Valerie had more money.
Both were bludgeoned and dumped in the same place one week after the other.
- What's the connection? - Library, bowling alley, nail salon.
- Could be anything.
- Let's focus on what we know.
What about the homeless guy Bestin hit? He's been in a secure mental facility since last year.
Speaking of mental facilities, have you seen Jane? I need to talk to him.
There you are.
Where's my couch? Oh.
Yes.
I bought you a new one.
- I like my old couch.
- No, you don't.
- You gotta try this one.
- Let's discuss it later.
We have to talk.
- You ever been into knitting? - What? - No.
You grew up surrounded by boys.
- What? Hi there.
You seem to have nimble fingers.
- Have you ever been a knitter? - No.
Agent Lisbon? Yes, Dr.
Montague.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
- And you must be Patrick Jane.
- I must be.
You were saying we needed to talk? Yes.
Dr.
Montague is consulting on the case.
Oh.
She's a decision science consultant.
She works with the FBI and state agencies.
Her work helped bring in the Quarry Killer.
I'm developing a predictive computer model.
It identifies the patterns in crimes and assesses whether they were committed by the same perpetrator.
Wow.
Cool.
The system's flagged your two murders as a killer known as the Caveman.
I remember him.
He bludgeoned his victims with a wooden club.
That was 10 years ago.
But the similarities between his victims and the victims in this case - are statistically identical.
- How so? The Caveman always picks two victims, one week apart.
The same physical attributes.
Brunettes, 120 to 140 pounds.
In every other respect, the choice seems entirely random.
No geographic or demographic pattern.
Victims are bludgeoned on the head with a wooden object.
No evidence of sexual assault, bodies are left in waste sites and scrap yards.
And the victims are unknown to each other.
This is classic Caveman.
Hmm.
At least you're wrong with conviction.
These women knew each other.
How do you know that? Okay, so this one.
And, yes.
Now, if you look at the detail in this rose and then again at the detail in this scarf they were both done by the same hand.
- Hmm.
Intriguing handicraft theory.
- Yeah.
But even if we were to establish a link between the victims it doesn't exclude the Caveman.
It merely expands the modeling paradigm.
"Merely expands the modeling paradigm.
" Wasn't the Caveman known for sending poetry animal organs, even crude drawings to the police? - We haven't received anything like that.
- We will.
Boss, we found out Valerie Bestin was a financial director at an online company called Agile Turtle.
Dr.
Montague, this is Agent Wayne Rigsby.
Dr.
Montague's consulting on the case and you'll be her liaison.
- Pleasure to meet you.
- Why don't you show her around.
I can give you the 50-cent tour.
We'll start in Major Crime.
Really? A decision science consultant? Don't start.
This goes way above us.
We're good to the feds, the feds will be good to us.
- When in doubt, don't act out.
- You just made a rhyme.
- When am I ever in doubt? - You start trouble and I-- You'll burst my bubble? She was such a nice person.
She took all these underprivileged kids hiking at Half Dome earlier this year.
Mr.
Beechum, did Valerie have any friends or co-workers - that were young Latinas? - Mm, no.
There's not that many women that work here.
You had a crush on her, didn't you? - Why do you say that? - Attractive young woman single computer programmer, birds, bees.
I could go on.
I'm more of an entrepreneur than a programmer these days but that isn't an untrue statement.
She was a lovely lady.
When you made your move, she shot you down.
No.
Well.
Yeah, I wouldn't really call it a move.
But there were no hard feelings.
I mean, if I killed every woman that shut me down, I would be a monster.
You know, well-- I mean, I'm not-- You know what I mean.
Mm-mm.
When was the last time you saw Valerie? Uh, yesterday, at work.
- Okay, I think we're done here.
- You do? Yes.
Oh, actually, no.
I have one more question.
Where's the nearest homeless shelter? Valerie was deeply guilt-ridden over hitting the homeless guy.
She started collecting soap, shampoo and crayons.
She was taking kids hiking.
- She probably volunteered-- - At a homeless shelter? Sometimes you act like I don't know jack.
More rhyming.
No, that's even rapping.
Sometimes you act Like I don't know jack Drop a beat back there.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Valerie Bestin? Of course.
She volunteered here.
That's what I told the other people.
- What other people? - Um those people.
Hi.
- How'd you know to come here? - Women are more likely than men to self-direct into redemptive recourse after crimes.
Given Bestin's lack of relapse after DUI-with-injury incident she would follow the pattern.
I called treatment facilities and shelters in the surrounding areas until I found the right place.
So you guessed.
Well, it's more of a scientific hypothesis, really.
- Just keep us in the loop.
- Noted.
I need to head back and code these interviews.
If you'll excuse us.
You have to admit, she knows her stuff.
I'm admitting nothing.
She's huffing and puffing.
Wait.
That rhymes.
Like I told Dr.
Montague, I didn't know Valerie very well.
But she would often bring donations with her.
Desperately needed.
We're stretched pretty thin around here, so our focus is on our guests.
Uh, Paula had more contact with her than I did.
Valerie was a saint.
She never talked down to nobody.
Always making sure we was eating better, drinking less.
Hell, when Marty died she was, like, crying.
She really cared.
Marty? A former guest.
He passed away here a couple of weeks ago.
A bad case of flu swept through here.
A lot of people got sick and poor Marty's system just couldn't handle it, you know? - Any other questions, Jane? - Uh, yes.
- Um, I do have one more question, in fact.
- Yeah? Do either of you recall whether Valerie was a knitter? - Knitting? - Thank you for your time.
All right.
Thank you.
Just got back the forensics report.
Both victims were bludgeoned with the same object.
Identical wood fibers were found in both their wounds.
Sounds like the Caveman.
I don't think he has a patent on killing with a 2-by-4.
We should think about a press response to this.
Being ahead of media speculation makes us look less reactive.
We're not sure it's the Caveman.
We don't need to speak to the press.
I disagree.
But I hear you and I understand your concerns.
Yes, you hear me, most certainly but I doubt very much you understand my concerns.
If you're sure it's not the Caveman, why are you reading his file? I like to read.
I have insomnia.
I don't like warm milk.
I'm lactose intolerant.
I could go on.
Did you know that habitual mockery is a strong indicator of depression? No.
But thank you for enlightening me.
Uh, that was inappropriate.
I apologize.
Ugh.
This is the last address.
One of these vans has to have been at the salvage yard.
- How many left? - Nine.
We already hit eight.
God, my feet hurt.
Your feet hurt? Is there some way we can work this out? What? I have to spell it out? I lied.
I lied to the PSU to protect my dad and you had to lie to cover me.
And I owe you, big time.
I get that you're mad at me and I'm sorry.
- Please, can we move past this? - Ha-ha-ha! - Okay.
- Okay? What, like, "we're okay" okay? Police.
Hey, what the hell, man? CBI.
We need to ask you a couple of questions.
- You the owner of this van? - Yeah.
Get your transmission fixed this morning? Yeah.
Why? Ma'am, where'd you get that bracelet? At the "none of your damn business" store.
Did your friend Yasmeen in the van know where this bracelet came from? That wasn't a friend.
That was just a little dinner.
Weird your dinner's name was Yasmeen, but this bracelet - has the initials F.
T.
engraved on it.
- Imagine that.
Too bad you forgot the matching earrings off the woman you killed.
I didn't kill anybody.
Then how'd you end up with a dead woman's bracelet? Decomposing bodies can leave a lot of evidence.
Only a matter of time before they match the DNA left on this bracelet to her body.
Look, sometimes I haul junk to that yard.
I was there looking around for whatever, there she was, already dead.
Bracelet wasn't doing her any good.
Eh.
- Too much of a wuss to be a killer.
- Lacking in grandiosity.
Only one divorce.
No traffic violations.
An undercurrent of rage would normally express itself at least in a driving record.
I'm not seeing a propensity for violence.
So you agree with me? Not our killer.
Hmm.
The Caveman was never known to steal jewelry off his victims so that clears up that anomaly.
Life's just one giant mathematical equation for you, isn't it? I would like that, I confess.
- This isn't the Caveman.
- So you say.
I got a dollar that says the same thing.
I have no objection to gambling.
You're on.
Hmm.
- Someone's popular.
- Hardly.
- What is it? - Ugh.
What the hell? - Ew! - Looks like a kidney.
There's a poem on the other side of that paper, I suspect.
You've seen this before? The ladies are dead I crushed their heads And after the lash They go into the trash - It's from the Caveman.
- Poetry week.
- You could have done better than that.
- We had a wager? Oh, yeah.
Thank you.
We received reliable notification from the individual calling himself the Caveman who claims responsibility for the murder of two local area women.
- Hi.
- Miss Montague in her element.
It's not often you see a profiler basking in the spotlight.
Montague says a killer like the Caveman craves acknowledgement for his crimes.
Giving him some attention could keep him from taking another victim early.
- You like Montague, don't you? - No.
- I mean, I don't dislike her.
- What's to dislike? Right.
I'm still working on, uh, where the Caveman sent the package from - but we got an ID on the other victim.
- Excellent.
Fernanda Talan.
Initials on the back of her stolen bracelet helped make a match.
Her cousins reported her missing about a week ago.
She worked for them at Dos Hermanas bottling plant.
Ah.
Still wearing that brooch, I see, but where's the power suit? Wearing a palette of neutral tones is less threatening when interviewing people.
- Hi.
- Hey, boss.
I just got Valerie Bestin's phone records.
She's been getting a lot of calls from Donovan Treadlow, the shelter director.
- He said he barely knew her.
- Well, he lied.
Take Cho, get the story.
Fernanda was our cousin from my mother's family.
She came to us to get away from the violence in Oakland.
This wasn't supposed to happen to her.
Her brother was killed just last year and now this? She was going to make it.
When was the last time you saw Fernanda? About a week ago.
She took the bus after work and just vanished.
We were worried when she didn't show up the next day.
- She never missed work.
- Where did she work? - On the line.
- In there? Have you seen Valerie around your neighborhood? No.
We only heard about her through the news and you all.
I like the packaging.
What flavor is that? Um.
Probably our orange cream sodas, right, Esther? Yes.
We make natural sodas.
No corn syrup, no artificial flavors.
We employ locals, pay them right.
People used to shake their heads when we started, but now they're getting it.
Fernanda had made a huge change here.
She wanted to be a nurse and.
It's just all so sad.
This a boy or a girl? I can't really see.
It's a boy.
A boy lizard.
What's his name? - Chuy.
- Hey, Chuy.
Miss Montague, you're awfully quiet.
I'm sure you have some questions.
Miss Montague here, she's, uh, super, super clever.
She's a scientist.
- Thank you, Mr.
Jane.
- Pleasure.
Did Fernanda ever abuse alcohol? No.
What about illegal or controlled substances? What are you trying to say? That Fernanda got mixed up in drugs? Traits and habits which might give insight into why she was chosen by the Caveman.
Finding out why Fernanda's to blame for getting murdered? What kind of quack are you? I'm sure that's not what Dr.
Montague meant.
It appears that you've got this covered, so I'm gonna go and take a little look.
Ma'am, I did not mean to offend.
If you'll let me explain my procedure to you.
Fernanda was a sweetheart.
Hard worker.
Had gotten pretty sick a couple of weeks back, but there she was, on the job.
- Sick how? - Stomach bug, something.
- Dedicated.
- Absolutely.
Shy at first, but then she really got into it.
Asking how we did things, you know? Just learning the process.
- Can I, um, try one of these sodas? - Absolutely.
Cheers.
Mm! Yeah, that's good.
What's, uh, happening tomorrow night? They're having a candlelight vigil for Fernanda.
Mm.
Is the Helios Street line difficult to get to? No.
Bus stops right out front.
- Hey.
- Hi.
Lisbon's just finishing up in there.
Won't be a moment.
- What'd you find out? - Various things.
All data is useful data.
- So nothing, then.
- And you? Well, I found out how our two victims were connected.
- How? - Get on the bus, I'll show you.
- Wait, but my car is-- - No, just get on the bus.
Come on.
Mr.
Treadlow you had a late-night conversation with Valerie Bestin the day before she died.
You hardly knew her and there you are calling her at midnight.
Why'd you lie? How it looks is bad, but it was shelter business.
Your wife can confirm that.
- That's not necessary.
- Then tell us about those calls.
Valerie was always thinking she saw me being too friendly with female guests.
- What did she see? - Me comforting them.
Never discount the power of healing touch.
So how often are you healing the homeless women around here? Don't make it sound so sordid.
If there were nothing wrong, your wife would be standing here.
Look, Valerie kept yammering about how she was gonna tell my wife if I didn't.
So I was trying to persuade her to let me handle it in my own way.
We've looked into you, Mr.
Treadlow.
You and your wife started running this shelter nine months ago? Yes, when we moved to the area.
This isn't the first time you've lived around here.
You worked construction here, I did.
What are you getting at? You left town in a housing boom just after a serial killer stopped murdering local women.
And now you're back and here's the Caveman again.
Crazy, right? - Come on.
- You need to come with us.
Please.
That, uh, brooch that you wear all the time does it carry any special meaning or significance? - No.
- No? I only own one piece of jewelry.
It saves time and mental energy.
That's very efficient.
Lucky it looks very good on you.
Thank you.
There's Agile Turtle.
So the office where Valerie Bestin worked is on the same bus route as the factory Fernanda Talan worked.
The homeless shelter's on the same line too.
All right, that's a very suggestive link but-- Lisbon? Yes, I ditched you, uh, I must confess.
Look at the bright side, I left you with a car this time.
There's no need to be so grumpy.
It's okay.
I call bearing news.
Our victims met on the Helios line.
It's a bus route.
A bus.
Public transportation, yes.
And I would bet that the killer met the victims on this same bus.
Mm-hm.
Well, it's always a pleasure.
Okay.
Bye-bye.
- Pure surmise.
- Yes.
Pure.
Anything on the Jane bus angle? Found out Valerie barely used her car even though she got her license back.
She mainly took the bus, just like Fernanda.
- Cho, I thought you were with Treadlow? - I'm letting him think awhile.
Working with the DA to get personnel files released by the bus company.
- Van Pelt? - I'm running filters on all riders with bus passes to see if anything flags.
Nothing yet.
Okay.
And when you're done with that, find my old couch.
I don't recall there being a correlation between the victims and the use of public transportation.
The Caveman's adapting.
I'll need to update my model.
- Miss Montague, just-- - Doctor.
Dr.
Montague.
- Dr.
Miss Montague-- - Just doctor.
- Doctor? - Yes.
- Montague? - Mm-hm.
Turn the super computer off.
Sit back and enjoy the ride, and the company.
If possible.
- Mr.
Jane-- - Yes.
Got it in one.
Yes.
On a notion - Mm-hm? - you have us sitting on a bus because our victims might have been on the bus at the same time? This is messy.
Can I ask you a question? As professionals.
Two professionals.
Peers, if you will.
Why can't a notion, a thought or an idea just hang out there for a moment? Just hang.
Because life is order and sequence.
- Death is disorder, entropy.
- Hmm.
Did you know that California leads the nation in serial killers? Job security, at least.
Excuse me.
Pardon me, ma'am.
Uh, I couldn't help but notice the beautiful detailing work in this scarf.
Did you knit this? Yes.
I did.
It's very nice.
You know, you could sell these.
Do you? - Have you thought of selling these? - Yes.
You want to look? If you don't mind.
They're very nice.
She's got some great stuff here.
Can I just try this on my lady friend? Ahem.
Look at this.
Look at that.
It's a similar style to the one Fernanda was wearing.
And it looks just terrific with her ensemble, no? Yes.
Excuse me, ma'am, we're investigating the murder of-- - No understand.
- If I could just ask-- - No understand.
- But if you could just wait a second.
Excellent people skills.
That's sarcasm.
We can work on that.
- Hey.
- Hey.
I was going through the personnel files for the bus drivers and something flagged.
A bus driver.
His name is Ralph Mercer.
He's only been with the bus company for the last six months.
So? According to his Social Security number, he's been dead 15 years.
So I did a little more digging and fingerprint records say Mercer is actually Arthur Coffey.
Not a nice guy.
Long sheet, including aggravated rape and assault with a deadly weapon.
- He drives the route our victims rode? - Afternoon and evening shifts.
Great.
Where is he now? Got his route schedule from his boss.
He's on the road.
Hello, everybody.
I'm Patrick.
Uh, I'm sure you've all heard about the two local women found murdered.
Yes? Yes.
Fernanda Talan and Valerie Bestin, they rode this bus every day.
Yes, they did.
And we-- When I say "we" I include my charming associate, Dr.
Montague.
We wanna know what you know about them.
And any other shady people that you may have noticed on the bus.
Any information may be important.
Any little piece of information may be important.
Anything at all.
Any detail.
Okay.
Thank you.
Excellent people skills.
Ah, sarcasm.
That's very good.
You're learning.
But, uh, I, in fact, got an excellent response.
I'm told that the driver is a little shady.
- Really? - Yes, really.
- Wait a minute.
- What the hell is going on, huh? How did--? Why are you guys following me? - Uh, we'd like to ask you some questions.
- Are you cops, or--? No, we're consultants with law enforcement.
Uh-huh.
Uh, she's with law enforcement.
I'm an innocent bystander.
- She lured me into this whole mess.
- He's getting away.
- Do something.
- Like what? What am I gonna do? Drop the weapon.
Face down on the ground, now.
Oh, that's nice timing.
Darn, with him in the back, there won't be room for you two.
- Well, how are we gonna get back? - Take the bus.
He was our driver.
Nice sheet, Arthur.
Carjacking, extortion, rape.
Now that we've found 30 bindles on you, we can add dealing.
I wanna straighten out, okay? I got a disease called addiction.
That's all it is, the dealing.
I'm just trying to, you know, maintain.
I'm a good person that made some wrong choices.
Are you the first born in your family, Mr.
Coffey? Yeah.
- Ever heard of the Caveman? - Sure.
- From the TV news.
- You know these women? Yeah.
They rode the bus.
They were killed by the Caveman.
I mean, it was just on TV.
In fact, yeah, it was you that was on TV, said it was the Caveman, right? - Yeah.
- Heh.
- How many sexual partners have you had? - Wow.
You like to cut to the chase.
Um, like a hundred, 150.
Women? Men? Hello? Women.
- What is your point here? - Whether you killed these women because they found out your side business or you're the Caveman.
Hey, no.
You think I'm the Caveman? No, you got me all wrong here.
I deal a little blow, okay? I don't do murders.
I think I'll take a lawyer now.
Eh.
He's the only suspect we have with a direct link to both victims.
Yes, it's all very compelling, but I'm not convinced.
And yes, you should.
- Should what? - Oh, you know what.
- No.
- Oh, yes, you do.
- No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.
That bus driver is an ass, but he isn't the Caveman.
I'm thinking the same thing.
His shifts at work don't match up with our timeline.
And without hard evidence, I had to cut Treadlow loose.
So we have to start from scratch.
Damn it to hell.
Ooh.
Language, please.
Bertram is on Hightower's back, she's on mine.
It's all, "Catch the Caveman, catch the Caveman.
" I hate serial killers.
The Caveman didn't kill Fernanda and Valerie.
- Trust me.
- Well, how can you be so sure? Because I wrote the letter from the Caveman.
- What did you just say? - I wrote the letter from the Caveman.
- I heard you.
- Why did you ask me to say it again? - It was a rhetorical question.
- I wanted to stir things up.
Just give Montague a little prod.
- I get it.
She irks you.
- She doesn't irk me.
I like her.
In fact, she amuses me.
Everybody is freaking out because they think there's a serial killer on the loose.
Well, there is that.
But that was her story.
She made that up, not me.
Undoing this is gonna be a nightmare.
The press is gonna have a field day.
I have to tell the families.
Isn't there a candlelight vigil somewhere this evening? I think so.
It's all gonna work out just fine.
I have no doubt in my mind.
- Dr.
Montague.
- Agent Rigsby.
Interesting line of questioning you had going in interrogation.
Oh, well, yes.
As you know, sexual promiscuity and risky behavior are reliable indicators in psychopathy.
Uh, yes.
You can learn a lot about a person from their sexual history.
I remember this one time we had this guy in custody and he had a-- It was-- It's an inappropriate story sexual history-wise.
- This has been, uh, nice.
- What has been nice? - Talking with you.
- Oh, well, you're welcome.
- Agent Rigsby.
- Yes? - Your tea.
- Yes.
Heh.
I-- I'll take that to go.
Heh-heh.
What Agent Rigsby wanted to say.
Well, he wanted to ask you out on a date tonight.
Oh.
Uh, uh.
I was going to go to the candlelight vigil.
- Busy.
- Oh, I got-- I picked that thing up.
This is for you.
Rigsby picked it out.
I didn't.
I have no idea what's in that box.
- You didn't--? - Yes, you do.
- No, I don't.
- Um.
Um, wow.
Thanks for coming out.
Fernanda's family was kind enough to include us in this vigil because we're all working toward the same end.
We need to speak up.
We can't let a killer like the Caveman hold our community hostage.
Don't let Fernanda and Valerie die in vain.
If you have something to say, please come forward.
Good evening.
Uh, excuse me.
My name is Patrick Jane.
Uh, I offer my condolences.
I'm part of the team that will bring this killer to justice.
I do have some unfortunate news.
We've just learned that the letter we believed to be from the Caveman is, in fact, a very clever forgery.
- So what does that mean? - We're pretty sure the Caveman didn't kill your loved ones.
Someone is using the Caveman as a foil.
- You all said it was him on TV.
- The profiler lady said - you were making good progress.
- She made a mistake.
I am sorry, but it happens.
So do you know anything? Again, I'd like to apologize profusely for our error.
Uh.
It appears that this, uh, forger is one of unparalleled skill.
Oh, my God.
That's blood.
Oh.
What is that? The profiler lady was wearing that brooch.
She was.
I'm no specialist, but that looks like a kidney.
There's a note.
"Your profiler is dead.
Stupid copycat will join her at midnight.
" Signed, "From the Caveman.
" Oh, no.
Lisbon, where are you? I need your help.
- Listen, thanks for tonight.
I had fun.
- So did I, Wayne.
Um, I enjoyed your funny stories immensely.
Good.
And I enjoyed your, uh-- Well, I learned a lot about statistical analysis.
- I hope I didn't bore you.
- No, not at all.
Um, in fact, would you like to go out again? I would.
I would.
You are an attractive and stable character.
Thank you.
I don't need to conduct an analysis to see that you're still in love with someone else.
The probability of us having a successful relationship is no more than 20 percent.
- Twenty percent? - Mm, tops.
Where is everybody? I thought we were working the night shift.
Oh, hi.
Everybody's out catching the killer.
- Seriously? - No, I'm joking.
- Oh.
- That was sarcasm.
Uh, they're out catching the killer.
- Nilda, will you hurry up? - What about Chuy? Forget the lizard, already.
Essential items only.
Come on.
Hurry.
It's the Caveman.
This is all a big mistake.
We never meant to copy you.
We took the bodies to the first place we thought of.
Nothing to do with you.
- We had no idea.
- Please don't do this.
Boo.
We're thinking this has to do with your natural soda.
- Something not so natural in it? - Well, that's no secret.
A lot of foods require additives to keep them fresh.
Fernanda was giving her friend, Valerie Bestin crates of soda to distribute to the homeless, right? Yes.
Then a man at the shelter, Martin Brent, known as Marty died after drinking the soda, right? - I don't know any Marty.
- Sure you do.
I'm only telling you this so you know not to tell us stories.
Why would I lie about knowing some homeless guy? The assumption was Marty died because his system was too weak to fight the flu.
But when Fernanda got sick, she started to do some digging.
You can't tie that to us.
A simple blood test will show just what additives were present in his system.
Everyone at the shelter can confirm drinking the sodas who gave them out, and be tested as well.
Esther said the soda was losing too much flavor.
So we started using glycol as a stabilizer.
- We got a bad batch.
- How bad? Esther said you had to drink a lot of it in order for there to be any bad effects.
Most people just got an upset stomach.
It was only, like, 500 bottles.
You knew you were endangering the lives of your consumers.
Esther said pulling the product was too expensive.
Kept saying it was no big deal.
Who drinks 12 bottles in one go, anyway? Right.
And then the homeless man, Marty, died.
Fernanda made the connection, started asking questions.
Fernanda wouldn't let it go.
Said we had to issue a massive recall.
- She'd tell if we didn't.
- And then you killed your own cousin.
Yeah, we did.
And then Valerie showed up a week later and you knew what you had to do.
I told Esther that lady didn't know anything.
But she kept saying someone like her wouldn't stop coming around and asking questions.
So she had to go.
Fernanda was my prima.
She was supposed to stick up for her own.
But she chose that bitch on the bus over her family.
Thank you, man.
I appreciate it.
Really.
It's just soda.
- It is diet, right? - Yep.
- Mr.
Jane.
- Miss Montague.
We have some important business to conclude.
We do? For you.
Ah.
- I-- - Hang on.
- Yep, that's good.
Thank you.
- Okay? I always settle my debts.
You were right, it wasn't a serial killer.
Mm.
You remind me.
I almost forgot.
Thank you.
I'd forgotten it too.
Useful brooch.
Um, and I was hoping that you might forgive me any misdirection I might have given you.
Oh, yes.
Heh.
No.
Uh, actually, it was bracing to have one's operating principles challenged so robustly.
Glad to be of service.
You know, I've never participated in chicanery before.
I can't condone it as a system but I must admit, that it adds zest to the task at hand.
- Ha-ha-ha.
- In fact.
How did you figure it out? That it was Esther and Nilda.
Just a good guess.
When we first met with them, they were masking shame not sadness.
And who likes lizards? Cold-blooded people.
Lizards.
I think I shall stick with hard numbers.
I have another guess for you.
The Caveman isn't coming back.
He is almost certainly dead.
Possibly.
I have no personal bias on the matter.
The numbers will eventually reveal the truth either way.
They always do.
- You really believe that? - Of course.
If you can stand far enough back to see the big picture, everything is numbers.
Speaking of which you gave me a gift, so I must give you one.
I ran Red John through the modeling program.
You might find some of the data sets useful.
Hmm.
Wow.
A lot of figures and graphs here.
- That's right.
- Hmm.
Good luck.
Well, thank you.