Jane the Virgin (2014) s03e13 Episode Script
Chapter Fifty-Seven
1 LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Hola, friends.
As you know, Jane's husband died.
But three years later A publisher wants to buy my novel about Michael.
So sweet, right? But you know who hasn't been that sweet lately? Mr.
Sweetface.
So Jane and Rafael decided to take some action and get him an aide.
And as for Jane's parents, well, they weren't on such great terms, because Xo learned that Ro agreed to frame her as the evil ex on hon reality show.
Good thing Xo has her super cute lawyer boyfriend to lean on.
And as for Rogelio, well, he decided to quit The De La Vega-Factor Factor, - which felt great until - ROGELIO: I'm being sued for $10 million for breach of contract.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I know! Holy cow! Oh, that reminds me.
Remember Chuck Chesser, owner of the hotel next door? Well, Petra's been sleeping with him.
But now Chuck actually likes her.
But Petra has a secret.
See, there was a body found on the beach, right between the Marbella and the Fairwick.
And Petra Well, I'll show you - (lightning crashing) - Yeah.
So that, friends, is where we Oh, wait.
Shoot.
I forgot about Abbey.
Abbey is Raf's girlfriend, and she's really nice.
Which is why I hope Raf isn't up to something shady.
Though it sure seems like it.
And that's really where we left off.
When Jane Gloriana Villanueva was 27 years and 14 days old, she lost her voice - - (hoarsely): I'm sorry, Mr.
Sweetface.
I can't sing to you.
I can barely talk.
Daddy! - Daddy! - Daddy already sang two songs.
Enough.
Time for bedtime.
I love you.
More stalling? Thanks.
I don't know how I lost my voice.
I feel fine.
What? I have a few things on my mind, so I'm gonna go ahead and take advantage of this whole you-can't-talk situation.
- Well, that's a lit - Shh.
So, per our deal to keep each other informed I'm dating someone.
It's getting a little serious.
Her name is Abbey.
What? When did y Shh.
Don't use your voice.
That's all I want to say about it.
Next, it's time for you to start writing again.
Yes, I know You haven't made progress on the Venezuela novel.
So write something new.
It's been Long enough.
You have to start.
- It's not that easy.
- It doesn't even have to be good.
- (scoffs) - Just write.
About anything.
Uh, Kim and Kanye.
The-the history of throat lozenges.
The history of Florida.
It-it doesn't matter, okay? Just flex the muscle.
Okay.
That's all my wisdom for the night.
I have a date.
I need details.
Depends on how many pages I get.
(sighs) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Come on, you know he's right.
(groans softly) (sighing) Aw, I was hoping she'd go with lozenges.
A medicine and a candy! But anyway, the point is Jane began to read (sighs) You got this.
And that, my friends, is how Jane got her voice back.
- - And since then, well, she used it nonstop.
- You are being ridiculous.
- See what I mean? Of course I'm excited to meet my editor.
I was just expecting a woman, because You trust women more than men.
So not true! You do.
Admit it.
You have a bias.
You didn't even consider hiring Alex.
I considered him.
He's just Not as good as Carly.
Nope.
You only trust female authority figures.
It's a pattern.
Wow.
I've never noticed that before, but it's so true! Okay, if it's slightly true, it's not my fault I've just always been surrounded by women.
(chuckles) But, fine, I'll check my bias from now on.
Happy? (phone chimes) - Everything okay? - Yeah, it's Abbey.
She just wants to have a talk later.
Huh, she seemed fine this morning.
- Uh-oh.
- Mateo, are you excited to meet your new special friend Carly today? - (shouting) - Oh, man.
Come here.
Come here.
(grunts) Yes, I'm excited! Good.
You're gonna love her! (gibberish sound) Mwah! Do you think he loves her? - I can't tell.
He won't turn around.
- (gasps) I think she just said "Good job, Mateo.
" Or was it "Stop that, Mateo"? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Looked to me like "Screw you, Mateo," but I think I'm just really bad at this.
Okay, this is crazy.
We have to go before we get caught.
I know.
You're right.
Going.
Wait, what? (whirring) Oh, Jane, Raf.
Hey, Stacy.
So, how are things going with Mateo's new aide? I completely get why you need the extra help.
(chuckles) What a relief, - huh? - RAFAEL: Yeah.
It really is.
JANE: What a bitch! Can you believe her? What? She was nice.
Nice? Didn't you hear her tone? I think you're being a little sensitive.
No.
Trust me, this is a mean girl thing.
You just don't get it because you're a man.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Yep.
There's that gender bias.
Who's never experienced mean girls.
Or maybe you're just a little extra sensitive because you're feeling insecure about Mateo.
Maybe.
We'll see.
I have to go meet with my editor.
With my open mind.
- Good luck with Abbey.
- Yeah.
Thanks.
I'm thinking she just wants to come to the fundraiser, you know, get involved with school stuff.
- I want to move in.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh.
Wow.
You look shocked.
Surprised.
It's been over a year.
Where did you think we were headed? Right here.
Of course.
I just, you know, didn't expect today.
I know.
It's a little out of the blue.
Exactly.
You know? Um, I just thought you wanted to come with me to the fundraiser.
(chuckles) I assumed I'd be going to that.
(overlapping arguing) - No - I mean, I'm here all the time.
- You have the dr - Don't say I have that drawer.
A dramatic way of bringing it up.
Look, this is a big deal, because it affects Mateo and Anna and Ellie, too.
Good save, Raf.
So will you just give me a beat to think it through? (knocking, door opens) - KRISHNA: Mr.
Solano, I Oh, excuse me.
- Oh, no, that's okay.
I was just leaving.
- No, it's It's okay.
I'm fine.
CHUCK: You don't seem fine.
Well, I am.
Yeah.
I'm not buyin' that, darlin'.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: To remind you (lightning crashing) You're embarrassed to be seen with me.
Oh please.
No.
That's not true.
We're having lunch in Cooper City.
At 11:00 a.
m.
Yeah.
Well, I happen to love the food here.
Early.
- I know you moved the bones, ma'am.
- What? - I said watch out for the bones, ma'am.
- What is going on with you? Okay, fine.
You know what? You're right.
I am a little embarrassed.
And, uh and I know I shouldn't be.
So, tomorrow come to the Marbella for dinner.
All right.
And, wow, you're way more sensitive than I thought.
Can't judge a book by its cover.
(chuckles) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: But can you judge an editor by his office décor? There she is! Jane Villanue-bomb! Man, I really dug your book.
You crushed it.
Thank you.
So much.
It was epic.
I swear, I freaking inhaled it.
I'll remind you she'd written about her love story with Michael.
The railroad tycoons, all the letter writing.
And those robber barons? Dapper as hell.
To clarify, her love story with Michael as imagined in the early 1900s at the dawn of Miami's great hotel boom.
I mean, bam! Getting Josephine knocked up by the robber baron after that one-night stand was fire.
Great.
I really wanted it to be fire.
And Detective Martin almost getting shot on his wedding night but not! And then catching the villain, who ended up being the woman without the face! Hella happy ending! Ba-boom! But I need more obstacles.
- More than that? - LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: More than that? Especially in the middle section where it gets mad slow.
Look at Rake, the robber baron character.
I feel like he could be more bam, boom, bang! You got that? Makes sense? Definitely not.
Yeah.
Totally.
Good.
So go knock that rewrite out of the park! Bam! Bam! LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Let's see.
Where were we? I'm with child, Rake.
From our drunken night in the railway car? But though you are the father, I love Detective Martin, and I want to be with him.
I understand.
Ah, yes Go, Josephine.
Win him back.
Jane's novel.
Remember, more obstacles, Jane.
I'm awfully sorry if I offended you.
Only, I love Detective Martin, and I want to be with him.
(sinisterly): I understand.
Go, Josephine.
Win him back.
(chuckles) I don't care what you have to do, Kristoff, but find an excuse to lock up that Pinkerton, Martin.
She will be mine.
(laughing) She will be mine.
- - (laughing) (sighs) MAN: Stop worrying! They call me The Jaguar for a reason.
I'd kill for my clients.
- And I devour my prey.
- (jaguar roaring) It's just that ten million dollars is a lot of money.
For some people, so I've heard, you know? And I did quit the show.
And I did have a contract, so Yeah.
So what? I deal with this kind of thing all the time for my celebrity clients.
When Jennifer quit two movies in a row after filming had already started, I got the studios to pay her a million dollars.
Lopez? Garner? Aniston? (gasps) Lawrence?! We'll get it down to a couple hundred thou, which you'll pay out over ten years.
Chump change.
- Now, I need your list.
- Huh? All the people involved so we can start gathering intel for our attack.
(jaguar roaring) Oh, I'm being deposed.
Well, The De La Vega-Factor Factor did impact you.
I know, but I don't want to have to see Rogelio.
I'll go with you for support.
It's good to have your own legal counsel anyway.
- XIOMARA: Thanks, baby.
- BRUCE: Of course.
- (laughs) - Love you.
He is so sweet.
How can someone be so sweet? I don't know.
- (laughter) - BRUCE: And he's got - ass for days, right? - (laughter) I mean, when you factor in the difficult children, I mean LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Remember, Jane, Stacy probably wasn't being snarky about Mateo before.
I mean, I just hope Mateo's aide is going to be there because I can't handle that situation on my own.
- Ugh, trust me, I know.
- Excuse me.
So you know, my son is not a situation to be handled.
And I'd appreciate it if you grew up and stopped gossiping.
Just stay out of this.
I don't even know you.
STACY: Uh, Jane, this is Gwen Conway.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Huh.
Why does that name sound familiar? STACY: Yeah, we were just discussing the upcoming field trip.
I'm the only parent going, and it's a lot of kids to handle on my own.
That's all I meant.
Gotcha.
Oh! So sorry about that.
And it's really nice to meet you, Gwen.
Um, can I say, we are so happy to be here at your school? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I know.
I can't watch, either.
RAFAEL: It's a great card.
Really beautiful, hon.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Kiss ass.
But what about what I wrote in the card? Is that great? I mean, it's an apology for being rude, so I think "great" is probably hard to achieve.
So no? Jane, Gwen is not gonna kick Mateo out of school.
No, but he'll definitely get the bad teacher for kindergarten.
Okay, girls, why don't you go play with your brother in the playroom? Poor Mateo.
I know.
Let's hug him.
You must make this right.
Look, if Gwen doesn't like you, you're screwed.
Or rather, Mateo's screwed.
He'll get no special attention, he'll get all the bad teachers.
I'm fixing it.
I wrote a long apology note.
Words don't mean anything.
Only actions do.
Oh! Okay, there's a final planning committee for the annual fundraiser tomorrow.
Gwen will be there, and so will you.
This is important, Jane! Plus, everything you do reflects on me because I'm the one who got you in.
XIOMARA: My reputation was ruined.
Strangers confronted me at the grocery store.
Someone gave me the finger at a red light and called me a slut.
It was awful.
For the record, I want to reiterate how sorry I am for the part I played in causing this.
Okay.
Got it.
I think that's all we need.
Sounds like they assassinated your character.
Great, great stuff.
For our case.
Hopefully, we won't need to use any of it, though.
Much better to mediate.
That's right, in the media.
What? I am gonna drag this company's name through the mud so hard, - they beg us to settle! - (jaguar roaring) I love this guy.
I don't like this guy.
Trying to shame the production it's risky.
Well, there's nothing we can do.
- You could talk to Rogelio about it.
- (laughs) Oh, come on! The sooner this case is over, the better it will be for you.
Fine.
As long as you do it with me.
Of course.
We're a team.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And speaking of teamwork Thank you again to Petra for donating the use of the Marbella.
And thank you to the planning committee.
Your hard work has been inspiring.
(laughing) Monte Carlo night is going to be our best fundraiser yet.
- STACY: Agreed.
Absolutely.
- Mm.
All right, so, any more auction items to add, ladies? Yes, um, my sister can donate courtside seats - to the Heat game.
- Oh.
And I secured those Beyoncé tickets.
(people gasp) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Use your words, Jane! Say something! Um, well, I was thinking, uh, maybe if we lose the second fountain, we could make room for another table to make extra money.
I mean, looking at the budget, those fountains are a fortune, and the point is to raise money for the school, not spend it.
GWEN: We need the second fountain.
No one is going to pull out their wallets to donate if the event isn't great.
Huge mistake.
She loves fountains.
STACY: You know, I love the layout that we decided on last month.
Okay, so we need three more people to work tomorrow night.
Any volunteers? I would love to.
PETRA: And she just keeps messing up.
Honestly, it's kind of funny.
(laughs) Okay, never mind then.
Not funny.
Sorry.
Just distracted.
- Abbey? - Do you think I should do it? Yeah.
Probably.
Abbey's great.
I mean, Jane and I both like her, and that's saying something.
Yeah.
I know.
Oh, and by the way, not a big deal, but, um, Chuck and I will be dining at the restaurant tonight.
Got it.
Does he know we don't serve gator? RAFAEL: Hey, change of plans.
Petra will be out of her room tonight.
Got it.
- I'll get it done.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Get what done? Gosh, what are these two up to? Hey, hon, want Chinese? (sighs) I'm confused.
Okay, you can decide later.
No, the book.
I don't know if I'm going in the right direction.
I mean, I-I don't think I am.
But maybe I'm just used to what I had? Then again, this editor is Hey, hon, don't just discount him because he seems like a frat guy.
I know, you're right.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, sure! Now that a woman said it, you hear it.
I swear, now I'm seeing her gender bias everywhere.
I'm trying not to, and yes to the Chinese.
And button up before the delivery guy gets here.
You know he's got a crush on you.
Kind, sir, I'm here to seek your help finding Martin.
Oh.
Dear me.
(gasps softly) I seem to have a rip in my stocking.
Zara you are a sight for sore eyes.
That's not all I am.
What else are you? You can't put that in the book! I'm serious.
That's gross.
Take it out! Okay, please leave.
You are not supposed to be the literal obstacle to my writing.
Fine.
But I'm serious.
Take it out.
CHUCK: And we're out.
Calm down.
You're making a bigger deal of this than it is.
Oh, our public debut is a big deal.
Everyone's watchin'.
Oh, no.
I think I left my phone upstairs.
I'll be right back.
"You're not baili" on me, right? Oh, of course not.
Sit, get us some drinks.
What the hell are you doing here? Just some standard maintenance on the penthouse suites, ma'am.
Why didn't you call in advance? I mean, you can't just enter people's homes with no notice! I'm very sorry.
I'll come back another time.
(phone chimes) (sighs) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, dear.
Whose book is that? As Jane's editor would say, that's hella shady.
Bam! ABBEY: Hi, there.
Sorry to just come by, but I wanted to bring you Anna's blankie.
She left it at Raf's.
Oh.
Thanks.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And? And I also wanted to talk to you.
About Rafael, which I realize is completely inappropriate, but I'm sure you heard about the whole moving-in conversation? It might have come up.
- It seemed so out of the blue to him.
- Yeah, well, - part of that's just a guy thing.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Hey! I mean, they're like cows.
They have to be led to the water - and told to drink.
- Right, totally.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Maybe get a girl to narrate for you then.
But do you think he'll get there eventually? Honest opinion.
You know, I don't I don't want to set myself up.
I hope he does.
I think he should.
Ugh, men.
(laughter) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, come on! That doesn't count! He's four! (laughing) - How was he today? - Great.
- - We worked on - - paying attention to our neighbors.
And I probably shouldn't say this, but you know that kid Nick? - Yeah? - He's a little terror.
Yelling, interrupting.
Mateo is a dream in comparison.
Just so you know.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I see that smile, Jane.
Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow.
Bye, Mateo! (sighs) Another good day with Carly.
She's great, right? - Yeah, she is! - All right, let's go.
Yeah.
(chuckling) - (phone rings) - Oh.
Hello? JEREMY: Villanue-bomb! Uh, you think you can get me those new pages by the end of the week? Oh.
Uh, wow, that soon? Yeah, man.
Deadlines are what's up! That way I can check in, make sure you're moving in an awesome direction.
Right.
O-Of course.
(chuckles) No problem.
(sighs, mutters) (sighs) Hi, Bisa.
I have to go pee-pee.
So, now I havehaa deadline and.
.
Oh, hey, Bruce.
Where's Mom? Well, I came over to talk to you two, actually.
ABBEY: One more minute! (clears throat) Okay.
I'm ready.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I swear, this one is always sneaking up on me.
Wow.
You look beautiful.
Oh, thank you.
You look beautiful, too.
Are you ready for a night out with my two baby mamas at a cheesy approximation - of Monte Carlo? - Hey, don't ruin it for me.
I've never been to the real Monte Carlo, so for all I know, this could be exactly like Monte Carlo.
I can assure you, it is nothing like the real Monte Carlo.
But, hey, it's still pretty nice for a freakin' preschool fundraiser! Hi! Welcome! So, I've already sold 12 raffle tickets.
Oh, no.
We were at 50 by this time last year.
Oh.
(chuckles) I'm just warming up.
Oh.
(gasps) Hey.
Need a raffle ticket? - - Sorry.
Right.
You already bought one.
(exhales noisily) (indistinct chatter) (whispering): Keep selling.
Ooh, looks like someone has an idea.
Excuse me, Penelope, but I need your help.
Why would I help a floozy like you? You're carrying my husband's child.
But I don't want to be with Rake.
I want to be with Martin.
Why would I help a floozy like you? You're carrying my husband's child.
Why would I help a floozy like What's going on, Jane? If you don't know where you're going, why are you dragging me into this? I second that.
Jane, we're out of glasses.
Oh, I'm not working.
I-I know.
But what should we do? The-the dishwasher broke, I called room service.
We're literally out everywhere.
Have the bussers wash them.
The school didn't hire any bussers.
We're so shorthanded.
Okay, I'll handle it.
(sighs) - Hey, I need your help.
- Hey, Chuck, it's me.
Uh, you haven't been returning my calls, and, well, that's rude.
- Ooh! - Oh, look! Hey, ladies! Bonjour.
(chuckles) 'Cause it's Monte Carlo.
Anyway, we're out of glasses, and we're understaffed.
So I was thinking that if we wash the dirty ones during the auction, then we can fix this without anyone noticing.
Wash the dishes? (Xiomara groans) - - Rogelio again? He settled.
He loves his lawyer.
Okay, so maybe we were wrong.
I'm still glad we told him how we felt.
Yeah, except now he'll never stop gloating.
(scoffs) Yeah, right.
What? He hopes we can settle things soon, too.
Yeah.
I agree.
What? I think you should forgive him.
You're on his side? No.
(chuckles) I'm-I'm on your side.
Always.
Which is why I want you to be happy.
And the truth is, you're happier when you have your whole family in your life.
Just think about it.
(sighs) What are you thinking about? Just work stuff.
I hate everything I've written.
And I gave it a try.
I really did.
And it's not a man/woman thing It's a Jeremy thing.
And how did you learn how to wash dishes so fast? Oh, I was on KP duty in prison.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I keep forgetting he was in prison.
That time just flew by, huh? Hi there.
I heard what happened.
Don't worry, we have everything under control.
Well, I appreciate that.
Of course.
And I'm so sorry again about the yelling.
I've been stressed out about Mateo and obviously overly sensitive.
And when I thought someone was saying mean things about him, I just lashed out.
I guess because it preys on my insecurities.
Which I'm working on.
Well, parents are their kids' fiercest advocates.
(chuckles) Just bring the fierce down a notch from now on.
Got it.
Done.
And, of course, I asked Stacy to back off.
She can be a real bitch.
See? I gave her the benefit of the doubt.
She's always been so nice to me.
- No kidding.
- Big surprise.
All right, we get the point, ladies.
- Give him a break.
- I'll just go take these glasses out.
PETRA: No, no, don't refill it.
I'll just take a fresh one.
Oh Hey.
Everything okay? Yeah.
Feeling a little smutna.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Say what now? Yeah, your Czech only comes out when you've had too much to drink.
So What's wrong? It's Chuck.
He won't answer my texts.
He thinks I'm rozpacÃch.
Em-Embarrassed.
Embarrassed of him.
Okay.
Well, are you? Obviously, yes.
He's rude.
He's coarse.
He slurps when he eats.
And let's not forget the other issue of the bones.
Well, I guess you can't choose who you fall for, right? You also can't choose who you aren't falling for.
Look, you know I like Abbey.
I mean, she's so nice.
But you obviously don't want to move in with her.
So just tell her already, be done with this nesmysl.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Like I said, this one sneaks up on you.
PETRA: You know what, - I'm drunk.
- Ya think? So I'm gonna go.
O-kay.
Petra out.
Get home safely.
Yeah.
Who said she was going home? I know.
You're mad because you think I'm embarrassed of you.
And you know what? Maybe I am.
But I don't want to be, okay? Because I like you.
And I-I just want to (speaks Czech) And I know, I know you don't know what that means, but you're gonna be very happy when you find out.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Hmm.
He's got quite the poker face.
What? Poker night.
Like I said.
Guys, meet Petra.
Boom! Villanue-bomb in before the deadline.
(sighs) Yeah.
Well, I just wanted to talk to you.
Psyched.
Because I just don't think that we're a good fit.
- Less psyched.
- I'm sorry.
I tried implementing your notes, but they don't work for me.
Jane And I just really don't think that my book needs any more external obstacles.
The Rake storyline was always supposed to be simple.
Josephine loved him, he got her pregnant Wait, Josephine loved Rake? That didn't come through at all.
It didn't? No, it read like an olden times one-night stand.
Oh.
But that could be the missing obstacle, right? Boom.
Josephine's conflicted feelings in this love triangle.
- That would be enough? - Of course.
Dude, I'm sorry.
I never meant that the obstacles had to be external.
I just threw something out there.
You seemed to latch on.
I thought I had to take your note.
No! This is all a part of a long conversation.
That's how an editor-writer relationship works.
- Oh.
Wow.
- (chuckling): Yeah! Of course I want your voice, Jane! That's why I bought your hella good book.
So, look, you can handle these notes however you'd like.
It sounds like beefing up the baller love triangle is the most natural thing to do.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Which brings us here.
Now.
I like you so much, dude.
Thanks.
You're hella awesome.
(clears throat) I just can't write it, Abuela.
Somehow, deepening Josephine's love for Rake feels like a betrayal of Michael.
Martin.
And intellectually, I know that Mm.
Yeah.
Maybe.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And so, Jane wrote Be brave.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And friends, that's how Jane got her voice back.
- Again.
- BRUCE: Guys, - lower your voices, please.
- What am I supposed to do? She is ridiculously stubborn! - He completely betrayed me! - Hey! Enough! You're both here, so we're gonna work this out, because you have a child and a grandchild together, and everybody in your life is happier when you're getting along.
Including the two of you.
I mean, are you willing to concede that point at least, Xiomara? Yeah.
And you, Rogelio? Yes.
I'm so much happier with you in my life.
Maintain eye contact, Xiomara.
Rogelio, do you concede that you screwed up? Massively, yes.
And swear never to do it again, under penalty of never speaking? You have my word.
What's that nod mean, Xiomara? Do you forgive him? Then tell him! I forgive you.
Let's leave it in the past.
I'd love to.
Thank you.
So glad he had another good day.
You know about Stacy's older son, right? What? So, I probably shouldn't say this, but he isn't actually attending an exclusive boarding school like she says.
He's at a behavioral center for juvenile delinquents.
Really? I know! And don't even get me started on her so-called "perfect marriage.
" It's not perfect.
I heard he's had, like, three affairs in the last two years alone JANE: I just don't think it's appropriate for Carly to be gossiping like that about the kids and the parents? - No, definitely not.
- (sighs) But how do we get rid of her now? - Mateo loves her.
- No, I don't! What? I just said I did 'cause I could tell you wanted me to like her.
Okay, so, what do you not like about her, sweetie? She's just always talking on her phone and taking pictures of herself.
Hey, Mateo, I always want to know what you think, okay? Not what you think I want you to think.
Huh? Your voice is important to me.
We'll find you another aide.
That guy Alex seemed cool.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Yes! Redemption! PETRA: Why are you smiling? I had a nice time tonight, that's all.
Come on, we were out and about.
Mmm! In public! And I like you, Solano.
Yeah, I like you, too.
Don't look so upset about it.
Mmm.
So what do you say we bone? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oof, wrong choice of words there, buddy.
What? Too crass? What is it? Oh, come on, you can tell me, darling.
I want to.
I want to be honest.
So just say it.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: How to find the words Well, uh well when we found Scott's bones well, I-I panicked, and I-I, uh I kind I kind of Well, I I moved them on to your side a little bit.
What? Well-well, they were kind of on the line, so I just I just I kind of I I just scootched them over a little bit, and Look, I've felt horrible about it ever since, but it the case is closed, so, it's over, right? Please, Chuck, you have to understand, this hotel means everything to me.
And you could have destroyed mine.
No, I would have told before that happened.
Yeah.
Somehow I find that hard to believe.
Jane.
Hi, Stacy.
I can't believe you told everyone about my son.
What?! Oh, come on.
Carly works for the same company that my son's aide used to work for.
You obviously found out the truth, and you just ran your mouth.
Carly did tell me about your son, and-and I am sorry that you're going through that, but I didn't tell anybody.
I would never want to make you feel badly about that.
Parenting is hard enough.
It was probably Carly.
She is a huge gossip, which is why I let her go.
Oh.
Well, thank you.
(sighs) Hey.
I'm really sorry.
ROGELIO: You're sorry? - I thought this was settled! - It was, but somehow it leaked that we started this smear campaign, and now they're suing you for violating the non-disparagement clause.
But don't worry! We'll fight back, razzle-dazzle 'em.
But that's just more legal bills.
I just saved you $9.
8 mill, am I right? (jaguar roaring) RAFAEL: No.
Nothing has changed.
Okay, I just I thought about it, and I'm I'm not ready to move in.
And that made me think about us, - okay, and where we're at, and - Just stop.
I found this in your pocket.
You were gonna move in with me.
So I'm asking you again.
What changed? You obviously don't want to move in with her.
I just rethought things.
JANE: She's gonna be totally shocked.
- Are you sure? - Trust me, if she thought she was being proposed to, she wouldn't wear those sweats.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: OMG! Bruce is gonna propose to XO?! Okay, guys, you remember the plan? Places! ROGELIO: Bruce? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Uh, something tells me this isn't part of the plan.
I went to your office, they told me you were here.
Yeah, now is not a good time.
Listen, I know we've had our ups, and we've had our downs, but at the end of the day, you are a really smart guy, so I have an important question.
Is this the proposal? Yes! The proposal of a lifetime! I will do this now and in front of everyone! Bruce, you were right all along.
Donnie was sleazy, and I don't want him.
I want you! He's not on his knee.
I will go down on one knee! Bruce, will you be my attorney? (lively, upbeat music playing) Well, this is just kismet! What are the odds?! (laughs) BRUCE: Sure, Rogelio.
This wasn't for Rogelio, was it? No.
What? BRUCE: Oh, what the hell.
This isn't how I planned it, but that's life, right? Curveballs.
I love you so much.
And I love how far we've come.
And I lost you once, and I'm not gonna lose you again.
So, Xiomara Gloriana Villanueva will you marry me? Yes.
- (Jane laughs) - (applause) - Come on - (shrieking) (laughs) And you got a lawyer! Good job.
RAFAEL: So they're engaged? They sure are.
Hmm.
And the rewrite? Jeremy thought I crushed the new pages.
I got four bangs, three sa-weets, and two "killin' it!" I'm not surprised.
I loved it, too.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I did, too.
Jeremy loved it, Raf loved it.
All the men in your life loved it, not that you care what we think, but still.
You know, reading it really brought it all back You know, how we felt, how I want that again with someone else.
(sighs) That's why I broke up with Abbey.
You did? Yeah.
I just realized we weren't moving in that direction.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Huh.
And here I thought it was what Petra said.
And unfortunately, so did Abbey.
- What's this? - Don't know.
Came for you.
ABBEY: Hi there.
As you know, Jane's husband died.
But three years later A publisher wants to buy my novel about Michael.
So sweet, right? But you know who hasn't been that sweet lately? Mr.
Sweetface.
So Jane and Rafael decided to take some action and get him an aide.
And as for Jane's parents, well, they weren't on such great terms, because Xo learned that Ro agreed to frame her as the evil ex on hon reality show.
Good thing Xo has her super cute lawyer boyfriend to lean on.
And as for Rogelio, well, he decided to quit The De La Vega-Factor Factor, - which felt great until - ROGELIO: I'm being sued for $10 million for breach of contract.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I know! Holy cow! Oh, that reminds me.
Remember Chuck Chesser, owner of the hotel next door? Well, Petra's been sleeping with him.
But now Chuck actually likes her.
But Petra has a secret.
See, there was a body found on the beach, right between the Marbella and the Fairwick.
And Petra Well, I'll show you - (lightning crashing) - Yeah.
So that, friends, is where we Oh, wait.
Shoot.
I forgot about Abbey.
Abbey is Raf's girlfriend, and she's really nice.
Which is why I hope Raf isn't up to something shady.
Though it sure seems like it.
And that's really where we left off.
When Jane Gloriana Villanueva was 27 years and 14 days old, she lost her voice - - (hoarsely): I'm sorry, Mr.
Sweetface.
I can't sing to you.
I can barely talk.
Daddy! - Daddy! - Daddy already sang two songs.
Enough.
Time for bedtime.
I love you.
More stalling? Thanks.
I don't know how I lost my voice.
I feel fine.
What? I have a few things on my mind, so I'm gonna go ahead and take advantage of this whole you-can't-talk situation.
- Well, that's a lit - Shh.
So, per our deal to keep each other informed I'm dating someone.
It's getting a little serious.
Her name is Abbey.
What? When did y Shh.
Don't use your voice.
That's all I want to say about it.
Next, it's time for you to start writing again.
Yes, I know You haven't made progress on the Venezuela novel.
So write something new.
It's been Long enough.
You have to start.
- It's not that easy.
- It doesn't even have to be good.
- (scoffs) - Just write.
About anything.
Uh, Kim and Kanye.
The-the history of throat lozenges.
The history of Florida.
It-it doesn't matter, okay? Just flex the muscle.
Okay.
That's all my wisdom for the night.
I have a date.
I need details.
Depends on how many pages I get.
(sighs) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Come on, you know he's right.
(groans softly) (sighing) Aw, I was hoping she'd go with lozenges.
A medicine and a candy! But anyway, the point is Jane began to read (sighs) You got this.
And that, my friends, is how Jane got her voice back.
- - And since then, well, she used it nonstop.
- You are being ridiculous.
- See what I mean? Of course I'm excited to meet my editor.
I was just expecting a woman, because You trust women more than men.
So not true! You do.
Admit it.
You have a bias.
You didn't even consider hiring Alex.
I considered him.
He's just Not as good as Carly.
Nope.
You only trust female authority figures.
It's a pattern.
Wow.
I've never noticed that before, but it's so true! Okay, if it's slightly true, it's not my fault I've just always been surrounded by women.
(chuckles) But, fine, I'll check my bias from now on.
Happy? (phone chimes) - Everything okay? - Yeah, it's Abbey.
She just wants to have a talk later.
Huh, she seemed fine this morning.
- Uh-oh.
- Mateo, are you excited to meet your new special friend Carly today? - (shouting) - Oh, man.
Come here.
Come here.
(grunts) Yes, I'm excited! Good.
You're gonna love her! (gibberish sound) Mwah! Do you think he loves her? - I can't tell.
He won't turn around.
- (gasps) I think she just said "Good job, Mateo.
" Or was it "Stop that, Mateo"? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Looked to me like "Screw you, Mateo," but I think I'm just really bad at this.
Okay, this is crazy.
We have to go before we get caught.
I know.
You're right.
Going.
Wait, what? (whirring) Oh, Jane, Raf.
Hey, Stacy.
So, how are things going with Mateo's new aide? I completely get why you need the extra help.
(chuckles) What a relief, - huh? - RAFAEL: Yeah.
It really is.
JANE: What a bitch! Can you believe her? What? She was nice.
Nice? Didn't you hear her tone? I think you're being a little sensitive.
No.
Trust me, this is a mean girl thing.
You just don't get it because you're a man.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Yep.
There's that gender bias.
Who's never experienced mean girls.
Or maybe you're just a little extra sensitive because you're feeling insecure about Mateo.
Maybe.
We'll see.
I have to go meet with my editor.
With my open mind.
- Good luck with Abbey.
- Yeah.
Thanks.
I'm thinking she just wants to come to the fundraiser, you know, get involved with school stuff.
- I want to move in.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh.
Wow.
You look shocked.
Surprised.
It's been over a year.
Where did you think we were headed? Right here.
Of course.
I just, you know, didn't expect today.
I know.
It's a little out of the blue.
Exactly.
You know? Um, I just thought you wanted to come with me to the fundraiser.
(chuckles) I assumed I'd be going to that.
(overlapping arguing) - No - I mean, I'm here all the time.
- You have the dr - Don't say I have that drawer.
A dramatic way of bringing it up.
Look, this is a big deal, because it affects Mateo and Anna and Ellie, too.
Good save, Raf.
So will you just give me a beat to think it through? (knocking, door opens) - KRISHNA: Mr.
Solano, I Oh, excuse me.
- Oh, no, that's okay.
I was just leaving.
- No, it's It's okay.
I'm fine.
CHUCK: You don't seem fine.
Well, I am.
Yeah.
I'm not buyin' that, darlin'.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: To remind you (lightning crashing) You're embarrassed to be seen with me.
Oh please.
No.
That's not true.
We're having lunch in Cooper City.
At 11:00 a.
m.
Yeah.
Well, I happen to love the food here.
Early.
- I know you moved the bones, ma'am.
- What? - I said watch out for the bones, ma'am.
- What is going on with you? Okay, fine.
You know what? You're right.
I am a little embarrassed.
And, uh and I know I shouldn't be.
So, tomorrow come to the Marbella for dinner.
All right.
And, wow, you're way more sensitive than I thought.
Can't judge a book by its cover.
(chuckles) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: But can you judge an editor by his office décor? There she is! Jane Villanue-bomb! Man, I really dug your book.
You crushed it.
Thank you.
So much.
It was epic.
I swear, I freaking inhaled it.
I'll remind you she'd written about her love story with Michael.
The railroad tycoons, all the letter writing.
And those robber barons? Dapper as hell.
To clarify, her love story with Michael as imagined in the early 1900s at the dawn of Miami's great hotel boom.
I mean, bam! Getting Josephine knocked up by the robber baron after that one-night stand was fire.
Great.
I really wanted it to be fire.
And Detective Martin almost getting shot on his wedding night but not! And then catching the villain, who ended up being the woman without the face! Hella happy ending! Ba-boom! But I need more obstacles.
- More than that? - LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: More than that? Especially in the middle section where it gets mad slow.
Look at Rake, the robber baron character.
I feel like he could be more bam, boom, bang! You got that? Makes sense? Definitely not.
Yeah.
Totally.
Good.
So go knock that rewrite out of the park! Bam! Bam! LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Let's see.
Where were we? I'm with child, Rake.
From our drunken night in the railway car? But though you are the father, I love Detective Martin, and I want to be with him.
I understand.
Ah, yes Go, Josephine.
Win him back.
Jane's novel.
Remember, more obstacles, Jane.
I'm awfully sorry if I offended you.
Only, I love Detective Martin, and I want to be with him.
(sinisterly): I understand.
Go, Josephine.
Win him back.
(chuckles) I don't care what you have to do, Kristoff, but find an excuse to lock up that Pinkerton, Martin.
She will be mine.
(laughing) She will be mine.
- - (laughing) (sighs) MAN: Stop worrying! They call me The Jaguar for a reason.
I'd kill for my clients.
- And I devour my prey.
- (jaguar roaring) It's just that ten million dollars is a lot of money.
For some people, so I've heard, you know? And I did quit the show.
And I did have a contract, so Yeah.
So what? I deal with this kind of thing all the time for my celebrity clients.
When Jennifer quit two movies in a row after filming had already started, I got the studios to pay her a million dollars.
Lopez? Garner? Aniston? (gasps) Lawrence?! We'll get it down to a couple hundred thou, which you'll pay out over ten years.
Chump change.
- Now, I need your list.
- Huh? All the people involved so we can start gathering intel for our attack.
(jaguar roaring) Oh, I'm being deposed.
Well, The De La Vega-Factor Factor did impact you.
I know, but I don't want to have to see Rogelio.
I'll go with you for support.
It's good to have your own legal counsel anyway.
- XIOMARA: Thanks, baby.
- BRUCE: Of course.
- (laughs) - Love you.
He is so sweet.
How can someone be so sweet? I don't know.
- (laughter) - BRUCE: And he's got - ass for days, right? - (laughter) I mean, when you factor in the difficult children, I mean LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Remember, Jane, Stacy probably wasn't being snarky about Mateo before.
I mean, I just hope Mateo's aide is going to be there because I can't handle that situation on my own.
- Ugh, trust me, I know.
- Excuse me.
So you know, my son is not a situation to be handled.
And I'd appreciate it if you grew up and stopped gossiping.
Just stay out of this.
I don't even know you.
STACY: Uh, Jane, this is Gwen Conway.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Huh.
Why does that name sound familiar? STACY: Yeah, we were just discussing the upcoming field trip.
I'm the only parent going, and it's a lot of kids to handle on my own.
That's all I meant.
Gotcha.
Oh! So sorry about that.
And it's really nice to meet you, Gwen.
Um, can I say, we are so happy to be here at your school? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I know.
I can't watch, either.
RAFAEL: It's a great card.
Really beautiful, hon.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Kiss ass.
But what about what I wrote in the card? Is that great? I mean, it's an apology for being rude, so I think "great" is probably hard to achieve.
So no? Jane, Gwen is not gonna kick Mateo out of school.
No, but he'll definitely get the bad teacher for kindergarten.
Okay, girls, why don't you go play with your brother in the playroom? Poor Mateo.
I know.
Let's hug him.
You must make this right.
Look, if Gwen doesn't like you, you're screwed.
Or rather, Mateo's screwed.
He'll get no special attention, he'll get all the bad teachers.
I'm fixing it.
I wrote a long apology note.
Words don't mean anything.
Only actions do.
Oh! Okay, there's a final planning committee for the annual fundraiser tomorrow.
Gwen will be there, and so will you.
This is important, Jane! Plus, everything you do reflects on me because I'm the one who got you in.
XIOMARA: My reputation was ruined.
Strangers confronted me at the grocery store.
Someone gave me the finger at a red light and called me a slut.
It was awful.
For the record, I want to reiterate how sorry I am for the part I played in causing this.
Okay.
Got it.
I think that's all we need.
Sounds like they assassinated your character.
Great, great stuff.
For our case.
Hopefully, we won't need to use any of it, though.
Much better to mediate.
That's right, in the media.
What? I am gonna drag this company's name through the mud so hard, - they beg us to settle! - (jaguar roaring) I love this guy.
I don't like this guy.
Trying to shame the production it's risky.
Well, there's nothing we can do.
- You could talk to Rogelio about it.
- (laughs) Oh, come on! The sooner this case is over, the better it will be for you.
Fine.
As long as you do it with me.
Of course.
We're a team.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And speaking of teamwork Thank you again to Petra for donating the use of the Marbella.
And thank you to the planning committee.
Your hard work has been inspiring.
(laughing) Monte Carlo night is going to be our best fundraiser yet.
- STACY: Agreed.
Absolutely.
- Mm.
All right, so, any more auction items to add, ladies? Yes, um, my sister can donate courtside seats - to the Heat game.
- Oh.
And I secured those Beyoncé tickets.
(people gasp) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Use your words, Jane! Say something! Um, well, I was thinking, uh, maybe if we lose the second fountain, we could make room for another table to make extra money.
I mean, looking at the budget, those fountains are a fortune, and the point is to raise money for the school, not spend it.
GWEN: We need the second fountain.
No one is going to pull out their wallets to donate if the event isn't great.
Huge mistake.
She loves fountains.
STACY: You know, I love the layout that we decided on last month.
Okay, so we need three more people to work tomorrow night.
Any volunteers? I would love to.
PETRA: And she just keeps messing up.
Honestly, it's kind of funny.
(laughs) Okay, never mind then.
Not funny.
Sorry.
Just distracted.
- Abbey? - Do you think I should do it? Yeah.
Probably.
Abbey's great.
I mean, Jane and I both like her, and that's saying something.
Yeah.
I know.
Oh, and by the way, not a big deal, but, um, Chuck and I will be dining at the restaurant tonight.
Got it.
Does he know we don't serve gator? RAFAEL: Hey, change of plans.
Petra will be out of her room tonight.
Got it.
- I'll get it done.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Get what done? Gosh, what are these two up to? Hey, hon, want Chinese? (sighs) I'm confused.
Okay, you can decide later.
No, the book.
I don't know if I'm going in the right direction.
I mean, I-I don't think I am.
But maybe I'm just used to what I had? Then again, this editor is Hey, hon, don't just discount him because he seems like a frat guy.
I know, you're right.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, sure! Now that a woman said it, you hear it.
I swear, now I'm seeing her gender bias everywhere.
I'm trying not to, and yes to the Chinese.
And button up before the delivery guy gets here.
You know he's got a crush on you.
Kind, sir, I'm here to seek your help finding Martin.
Oh.
Dear me.
(gasps softly) I seem to have a rip in my stocking.
Zara you are a sight for sore eyes.
That's not all I am.
What else are you? You can't put that in the book! I'm serious.
That's gross.
Take it out! Okay, please leave.
You are not supposed to be the literal obstacle to my writing.
Fine.
But I'm serious.
Take it out.
CHUCK: And we're out.
Calm down.
You're making a bigger deal of this than it is.
Oh, our public debut is a big deal.
Everyone's watchin'.
Oh, no.
I think I left my phone upstairs.
I'll be right back.
"You're not baili" on me, right? Oh, of course not.
Sit, get us some drinks.
What the hell are you doing here? Just some standard maintenance on the penthouse suites, ma'am.
Why didn't you call in advance? I mean, you can't just enter people's homes with no notice! I'm very sorry.
I'll come back another time.
(phone chimes) (sighs) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, dear.
Whose book is that? As Jane's editor would say, that's hella shady.
Bam! ABBEY: Hi, there.
Sorry to just come by, but I wanted to bring you Anna's blankie.
She left it at Raf's.
Oh.
Thanks.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And? And I also wanted to talk to you.
About Rafael, which I realize is completely inappropriate, but I'm sure you heard about the whole moving-in conversation? It might have come up.
- It seemed so out of the blue to him.
- Yeah, well, - part of that's just a guy thing.
- LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Hey! I mean, they're like cows.
They have to be led to the water - and told to drink.
- Right, totally.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Maybe get a girl to narrate for you then.
But do you think he'll get there eventually? Honest opinion.
You know, I don't I don't want to set myself up.
I hope he does.
I think he should.
Ugh, men.
(laughter) LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oh, come on! That doesn't count! He's four! (laughing) - How was he today? - Great.
- - We worked on - - paying attention to our neighbors.
And I probably shouldn't say this, but you know that kid Nick? - Yeah? - He's a little terror.
Yelling, interrupting.
Mateo is a dream in comparison.
Just so you know.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I see that smile, Jane.
Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow.
Bye, Mateo! (sighs) Another good day with Carly.
She's great, right? - Yeah, she is! - All right, let's go.
Yeah.
(chuckling) - (phone rings) - Oh.
Hello? JEREMY: Villanue-bomb! Uh, you think you can get me those new pages by the end of the week? Oh.
Uh, wow, that soon? Yeah, man.
Deadlines are what's up! That way I can check in, make sure you're moving in an awesome direction.
Right.
O-Of course.
(chuckles) No problem.
(sighs, mutters) (sighs) Hi, Bisa.
I have to go pee-pee.
So, now I havehaa deadline and.
.
Oh, hey, Bruce.
Where's Mom? Well, I came over to talk to you two, actually.
ABBEY: One more minute! (clears throat) Okay.
I'm ready.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I swear, this one is always sneaking up on me.
Wow.
You look beautiful.
Oh, thank you.
You look beautiful, too.
Are you ready for a night out with my two baby mamas at a cheesy approximation - of Monte Carlo? - Hey, don't ruin it for me.
I've never been to the real Monte Carlo, so for all I know, this could be exactly like Monte Carlo.
I can assure you, it is nothing like the real Monte Carlo.
But, hey, it's still pretty nice for a freakin' preschool fundraiser! Hi! Welcome! So, I've already sold 12 raffle tickets.
Oh, no.
We were at 50 by this time last year.
Oh.
(chuckles) I'm just warming up.
Oh.
(gasps) Hey.
Need a raffle ticket? - - Sorry.
Right.
You already bought one.
(exhales noisily) (indistinct chatter) (whispering): Keep selling.
Ooh, looks like someone has an idea.
Excuse me, Penelope, but I need your help.
Why would I help a floozy like you? You're carrying my husband's child.
But I don't want to be with Rake.
I want to be with Martin.
Why would I help a floozy like you? You're carrying my husband's child.
Why would I help a floozy like What's going on, Jane? If you don't know where you're going, why are you dragging me into this? I second that.
Jane, we're out of glasses.
Oh, I'm not working.
I-I know.
But what should we do? The-the dishwasher broke, I called room service.
We're literally out everywhere.
Have the bussers wash them.
The school didn't hire any bussers.
We're so shorthanded.
Okay, I'll handle it.
(sighs) - Hey, I need your help.
- Hey, Chuck, it's me.
Uh, you haven't been returning my calls, and, well, that's rude.
- Ooh! - Oh, look! Hey, ladies! Bonjour.
(chuckles) 'Cause it's Monte Carlo.
Anyway, we're out of glasses, and we're understaffed.
So I was thinking that if we wash the dirty ones during the auction, then we can fix this without anyone noticing.
Wash the dishes? (Xiomara groans) - - Rogelio again? He settled.
He loves his lawyer.
Okay, so maybe we were wrong.
I'm still glad we told him how we felt.
Yeah, except now he'll never stop gloating.
(scoffs) Yeah, right.
What? He hopes we can settle things soon, too.
Yeah.
I agree.
What? I think you should forgive him.
You're on his side? No.
(chuckles) I'm-I'm on your side.
Always.
Which is why I want you to be happy.
And the truth is, you're happier when you have your whole family in your life.
Just think about it.
(sighs) What are you thinking about? Just work stuff.
I hate everything I've written.
And I gave it a try.
I really did.
And it's not a man/woman thing It's a Jeremy thing.
And how did you learn how to wash dishes so fast? Oh, I was on KP duty in prison.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I keep forgetting he was in prison.
That time just flew by, huh? Hi there.
I heard what happened.
Don't worry, we have everything under control.
Well, I appreciate that.
Of course.
And I'm so sorry again about the yelling.
I've been stressed out about Mateo and obviously overly sensitive.
And when I thought someone was saying mean things about him, I just lashed out.
I guess because it preys on my insecurities.
Which I'm working on.
Well, parents are their kids' fiercest advocates.
(chuckles) Just bring the fierce down a notch from now on.
Got it.
Done.
And, of course, I asked Stacy to back off.
She can be a real bitch.
See? I gave her the benefit of the doubt.
She's always been so nice to me.
- No kidding.
- Big surprise.
All right, we get the point, ladies.
- Give him a break.
- I'll just go take these glasses out.
PETRA: No, no, don't refill it.
I'll just take a fresh one.
Oh Hey.
Everything okay? Yeah.
Feeling a little smutna.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Say what now? Yeah, your Czech only comes out when you've had too much to drink.
So What's wrong? It's Chuck.
He won't answer my texts.
He thinks I'm rozpacÃch.
Em-Embarrassed.
Embarrassed of him.
Okay.
Well, are you? Obviously, yes.
He's rude.
He's coarse.
He slurps when he eats.
And let's not forget the other issue of the bones.
Well, I guess you can't choose who you fall for, right? You also can't choose who you aren't falling for.
Look, you know I like Abbey.
I mean, she's so nice.
But you obviously don't want to move in with her.
So just tell her already, be done with this nesmysl.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Like I said, this one sneaks up on you.
PETRA: You know what, - I'm drunk.
- Ya think? So I'm gonna go.
O-kay.
Petra out.
Get home safely.
Yeah.
Who said she was going home? I know.
You're mad because you think I'm embarrassed of you.
And you know what? Maybe I am.
But I don't want to be, okay? Because I like you.
And I-I just want to (speaks Czech) And I know, I know you don't know what that means, but you're gonna be very happy when you find out.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Hmm.
He's got quite the poker face.
What? Poker night.
Like I said.
Guys, meet Petra.
Boom! Villanue-bomb in before the deadline.
(sighs) Yeah.
Well, I just wanted to talk to you.
Psyched.
Because I just don't think that we're a good fit.
- Less psyched.
- I'm sorry.
I tried implementing your notes, but they don't work for me.
Jane And I just really don't think that my book needs any more external obstacles.
The Rake storyline was always supposed to be simple.
Josephine loved him, he got her pregnant Wait, Josephine loved Rake? That didn't come through at all.
It didn't? No, it read like an olden times one-night stand.
Oh.
But that could be the missing obstacle, right? Boom.
Josephine's conflicted feelings in this love triangle.
- That would be enough? - Of course.
Dude, I'm sorry.
I never meant that the obstacles had to be external.
I just threw something out there.
You seemed to latch on.
I thought I had to take your note.
No! This is all a part of a long conversation.
That's how an editor-writer relationship works.
- Oh.
Wow.
- (chuckling): Yeah! Of course I want your voice, Jane! That's why I bought your hella good book.
So, look, you can handle these notes however you'd like.
It sounds like beefing up the baller love triangle is the most natural thing to do.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Which brings us here.
Now.
I like you so much, dude.
Thanks.
You're hella awesome.
(clears throat) I just can't write it, Abuela.
Somehow, deepening Josephine's love for Rake feels like a betrayal of Michael.
Martin.
And intellectually, I know that Mm.
Yeah.
Maybe.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And so, Jane wrote Be brave.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: And friends, that's how Jane got her voice back.
- Again.
- BRUCE: Guys, - lower your voices, please.
- What am I supposed to do? She is ridiculously stubborn! - He completely betrayed me! - Hey! Enough! You're both here, so we're gonna work this out, because you have a child and a grandchild together, and everybody in your life is happier when you're getting along.
Including the two of you.
I mean, are you willing to concede that point at least, Xiomara? Yeah.
And you, Rogelio? Yes.
I'm so much happier with you in my life.
Maintain eye contact, Xiomara.
Rogelio, do you concede that you screwed up? Massively, yes.
And swear never to do it again, under penalty of never speaking? You have my word.
What's that nod mean, Xiomara? Do you forgive him? Then tell him! I forgive you.
Let's leave it in the past.
I'd love to.
Thank you.
So glad he had another good day.
You know about Stacy's older son, right? What? So, I probably shouldn't say this, but he isn't actually attending an exclusive boarding school like she says.
He's at a behavioral center for juvenile delinquents.
Really? I know! And don't even get me started on her so-called "perfect marriage.
" It's not perfect.
I heard he's had, like, three affairs in the last two years alone JANE: I just don't think it's appropriate for Carly to be gossiping like that about the kids and the parents? - No, definitely not.
- (sighs) But how do we get rid of her now? - Mateo loves her.
- No, I don't! What? I just said I did 'cause I could tell you wanted me to like her.
Okay, so, what do you not like about her, sweetie? She's just always talking on her phone and taking pictures of herself.
Hey, Mateo, I always want to know what you think, okay? Not what you think I want you to think.
Huh? Your voice is important to me.
We'll find you another aide.
That guy Alex seemed cool.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Yes! Redemption! PETRA: Why are you smiling? I had a nice time tonight, that's all.
Come on, we were out and about.
Mmm! In public! And I like you, Solano.
Yeah, I like you, too.
Don't look so upset about it.
Mmm.
So what do you say we bone? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Oof, wrong choice of words there, buddy.
What? Too crass? What is it? Oh, come on, you can tell me, darling.
I want to.
I want to be honest.
So just say it.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: How to find the words Well, uh well when we found Scott's bones well, I-I panicked, and I-I, uh I kind I kind of Well, I I moved them on to your side a little bit.
What? Well-well, they were kind of on the line, so I just I just I kind of I I just scootched them over a little bit, and Look, I've felt horrible about it ever since, but it the case is closed, so, it's over, right? Please, Chuck, you have to understand, this hotel means everything to me.
And you could have destroyed mine.
No, I would have told before that happened.
Yeah.
Somehow I find that hard to believe.
Jane.
Hi, Stacy.
I can't believe you told everyone about my son.
What?! Oh, come on.
Carly works for the same company that my son's aide used to work for.
You obviously found out the truth, and you just ran your mouth.
Carly did tell me about your son, and-and I am sorry that you're going through that, but I didn't tell anybody.
I would never want to make you feel badly about that.
Parenting is hard enough.
It was probably Carly.
She is a huge gossip, which is why I let her go.
Oh.
Well, thank you.
(sighs) Hey.
I'm really sorry.
ROGELIO: You're sorry? - I thought this was settled! - It was, but somehow it leaked that we started this smear campaign, and now they're suing you for violating the non-disparagement clause.
But don't worry! We'll fight back, razzle-dazzle 'em.
But that's just more legal bills.
I just saved you $9.
8 mill, am I right? (jaguar roaring) RAFAEL: No.
Nothing has changed.
Okay, I just I thought about it, and I'm I'm not ready to move in.
And that made me think about us, - okay, and where we're at, and - Just stop.
I found this in your pocket.
You were gonna move in with me.
So I'm asking you again.
What changed? You obviously don't want to move in with her.
I just rethought things.
JANE: She's gonna be totally shocked.
- Are you sure? - Trust me, if she thought she was being proposed to, she wouldn't wear those sweats.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: OMG! Bruce is gonna propose to XO?! Okay, guys, you remember the plan? Places! ROGELIO: Bruce? LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Uh, something tells me this isn't part of the plan.
I went to your office, they told me you were here.
Yeah, now is not a good time.
Listen, I know we've had our ups, and we've had our downs, but at the end of the day, you are a really smart guy, so I have an important question.
Is this the proposal? Yes! The proposal of a lifetime! I will do this now and in front of everyone! Bruce, you were right all along.
Donnie was sleazy, and I don't want him.
I want you! He's not on his knee.
I will go down on one knee! Bruce, will you be my attorney? (lively, upbeat music playing) Well, this is just kismet! What are the odds?! (laughs) BRUCE: Sure, Rogelio.
This wasn't for Rogelio, was it? No.
What? BRUCE: Oh, what the hell.
This isn't how I planned it, but that's life, right? Curveballs.
I love you so much.
And I love how far we've come.
And I lost you once, and I'm not gonna lose you again.
So, Xiomara Gloriana Villanueva will you marry me? Yes.
- (Jane laughs) - (applause) - Come on - (shrieking) (laughs) And you got a lawyer! Good job.
RAFAEL: So they're engaged? They sure are.
Hmm.
And the rewrite? Jeremy thought I crushed the new pages.
I got four bangs, three sa-weets, and two "killin' it!" I'm not surprised.
I loved it, too.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: I did, too.
Jeremy loved it, Raf loved it.
All the men in your life loved it, not that you care what we think, but still.
You know, reading it really brought it all back You know, how we felt, how I want that again with someone else.
(sighs) That's why I broke up with Abbey.
You did? Yeah.
I just realized we weren't moving in that direction.
LATIN LOVER NARRATOR: Huh.
And here I thought it was what Petra said.
And unfortunately, so did Abbey.
- What's this? - Don't know.
Came for you.
ABBEY: Hi there.