Pinky and the Brain (1995) s03e13 Episode Script
Pinky And The Brainmaker
Gee, brain, What do you want to do tonight? The same thing we do every night, pinky, Try to take over the world.
they're pinky and the brain yes, pinky and the brain one is a genius the other's insane they're laboratory mice their genes have been spliced they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain brain, brain, brain, brain, brain before each night is done their plan will be unfurled by the dawning of the sun they'll take over the world they're pinky and the brain yes, pinky and the brain their twilight campaign is easy to explain to prove their mousey worth they'll overthrow the earth they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain brain, brain, brain, brain Narf! warner bros.
[Tchaikovsky's waltz of the flowers playing.]
Pinky, how many times have i told you Not to frolic in the lab? Sorry, brain, but ballet gives you grace and poise And coordinaaaaa-- Do you realize what this gemination machine Will give us, pinky? Um, an excuse to look up the word "gemination"? No.
It will give us enough clones to take over the world! Now observe, while i use this photograph of myself To create the first clone.
He looks just like you, brain.
Yes.
And more importantly, he moves like me.
Now, follow So i can show you your task, pinky.
Yes! Yes! You make the clones While i teach them to dance.
Oof! More.
Brains: yes! Huh? Pinky.
Narf! Brain: i will create The world's most beloved celtic dance troupe.
Pinky: brain, i have a surprise.
Pinky, what have you done? Those aren't my dance steps.
It's left and-- Oof! Ooh! Dance! Dance! No! Brain clones: yes! Uhh uhhhh ohhhhh! [Gasps.]
[Giggling.]
Ha ha ha.
Poit.
Wake up, pinky.
What? Oh, brain, i had the most wonderful dream.
We were dancing and-- Silence.
We must prepare for tonight.
Why, brain? What are we going to do tonight? The same thing we do after every dance recital, pinky.
Try to take over the world.
they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain, brain Abandon your dignity.
I am a fish.
You are caught in a trap.
Peek-A-Boo! Hey! Somewhere beyond passion and obsession Lies subjugation.
Fishy, fishy, fishy! Narf! Whoa! Zort! Subjugation.
You will obey.
It's really stinky.
Ow! Well, pinky, what do you think of our commercial? What commercial? The one we were just watching.
Oh! Troz! You mean, the home movies? Ah, they make me nostalgic.
You were so different then.
That was last wednesday.
Those home movies were my skillful application Of the latest in subtle advertising techniques.
A commercial designed to convince an unsophisticated public That my new perfume will give them what they most desire.
Sand in their ears? No, pinky.
That exotic, mystical, alluring thing that everyone seeks from perfume.
Which is uh well, that really doesn't matter, pinky, Because what they will actually be buying Is a secret mind control formula.
I have isolated a precise combination of pheromones Which will stimulate certain subparietal receptor cells, Rendering the human brain Submissive to the exact frequencies of my voice.
So that people will actually like your singing? No, pinky.
This perfume will make its wearers Obey my every command, Allowing me to take over the world.
However, since i only have enough funds To show the commercial once at 3 a.
M.
On the weather channel, I'll have to find some other way Of bringing my perfume to the public's attention.
You could dress it up in pretty clothes And have it run screaming down the street.
Narf! It worked for me once.
Dress it up in pretty clothes And have it run screa-- Yes! Pinky, are you pondering what i'm pondering? Um, i think so, brain.
But 3 men in a tub? Ugh, that's unsanitary.
No.
We shall get fashion models To endorse my perfume, And it will fly off the shelf.
Now, come.
We're off to a place Where women are paid huge amounts of money To look beautiful and change their clothes frequently.
Charlie sheen's house? No, pinky, a fashion show.
Welcome to fashion expo, Where the world's top designers Are showing an explosion of color and shapes In their new spring collections.
Pinky: ooh, how exciting.
The world of fashion.
Maybe they'll give us their extra buttons For my collection of notions.
Pinky, you are one notion shy of a thought.
This is elsa kitsch reporting, And i'm here with designer fabrizio ditzio.
Fabrizio, what are your clothes saying to women this spring? For the spring, We say that the fashion can be bold and yet subtle And classic but still modern.
Are shapes important? Yes, elsa.
Today's woman is wanting a look That is fully cut and yet close to the body, With a silhouette that is long and sleek, Yet still short and sassy.
Oh, brain, i want to wear clothes.
These designers are so clever.
Don't be ridiculous.
This is classic double-Talk.
Round and yet square, Bright and yet dark.
Silly willy and yet fun, fun, fun! Zort! Whoa! Oomph! Pinky, you are stupid and yet imbecilic.
Coming up next, We'll see a garland of bright spring grays and browns As we go behind the scenes with giselle From the house of loco.
Brain: now come backstage, pinky.
We must interest the models in my new perfume, Which shouldn't be hard.
Apparently, they'll wear anything.
[French accent.]
claudia, darling, What a beautiful dress.
Now get out of those street clothes And put zis on.
Here we are, pinky.
Amid this chaos is the key to our future success.
Ooh.
Shiny buttons.
Ha ha ha ha! Fine, pinky.
Keep yourself amused, While i turn on my irresistible power of persuasion.
Excuse me.
May i speak with you for a moment? Woman: no.
Miss, uh, i'd like you to wear my new perfume.
Leave me alone, creep.
Pardon me, but would you be interested In endorsing a wonderful new fragrance? Why should i? Who are you? Actually, i'm a lab mouse Attempting to take over the world.
You won't get anywhere With a pathetic line like that.
Call my agent.
Aah! Apparently, her manners are no more developed Than her taste.
Buttons! Ha ha! Narf! Kate, what are you doing with that carrot stick? You want to get fat? Another behind-The-Scenes moment at fashion expo.
Heh heh heh.
Alors! I did not see you.
Tell me, giselle, Are shapes important? Everything is important, Down to zee last detail.
I'm ready.
Wait, zee outfit, she needs something.
Waa-Haaa! There.
Now, go! Go! Waaaah-Haah-Eeee! Whoa! [Crowd murmuring.]
Egad! Narf! Brain! Pinky? Brain! Aah! Aah! I can't see! How unusual.
What is going on? Who is responsible for zis? Ahem.
I am.
I'm sorry, brain.
I'm all a-Tangle.
Quiet, pinky.
I, calvin brain, Designed this stunning little ensemble To express, uh, uh that we are all a-Tangle in vanity and self-Image.
[All talking at once.]
Yes! Today, the world of fashion tomorrow the world! Welcome to stylish.
I'm elsa kitsch.
This week, designer calvin brain And new supermodel sensation pinky Literally set the fashion world on its ears.
With his infectious quelque chose And insouciant je ne sais quoi, Pinky is everyone's favorite cover boy.
Women everywhere are getting the pinky look.
High cheekbones are out, Big ears and buckteeth are in.
And designer calvin brain's pinky look Is all the rage on the paris runways.
In fact, aside from pinky, The hottest new male model is prince charles! Tell me, calvin brain, What is the secret to your look? Are shapes important? Yes, elsa.
You see, today's fashion Must be big and yet small, Flat and yet, uh, Poofy.
Dry and yet slightly moist.
With such keen insight, It's easy to see why calvin brain Has become an overnight superstar In the design world.
Thank you, elsa.
And now i'm taking my fashion career to new heights By introducing my own scent-- Subjugation by calvin brain.
Subjugation? Is that pinky's fragrance? His fragrance? It's his whole life.
You heard it here first.
Subjugation, the new scent by calvin brain.
Wear it and be humiliated.
Zort! I'm all a-Tangle.
i'm too famous for my narf! too famous for my narf! i've got a little scarf and i'm too happy for my zort! too happy for my zort! just watch me cavort That's the new video by, like, pinky 'n' all, And, like, guess what? Our guests on house of fads today Are, like, calvin brain and pinky 'n' all.
[Giggles.]
Narf! I'm all a-Tangle.
It's, like, way cool and stuff That, like, male fashion models Are finally getting some, like, respect.
Yes.
That's why it's so important to point out That my perfume, subjugation, Is actually a unisex scent.
So all of you, uh, chicks out there, Like, splash some on your dudes.
And all.
Totally cool! Totally cool! i'm a lab mouse i think it's so keen i do my little dance in a big limousine yeah, in my limo in my limo, yeah! i've got lots of cheese in my limo And so today i am launching Calvin brain kids.
Yay! Yay! Yay! That's doodle-Gummy gosh-All-Yummy-Liscious! Ha ha ha! Yay! Yay! Excuse me, Are shapes important? And don't forget, The most important part of the calvin brain kids' line Is subjugation perfume and bubble bath.
Troz! It looks just like me.
[Giggles.]
Children: yay! and i'm too happy for my troz too happy for my troz i love to lick my paws This is elsa kitsch Reporting live via worldwide satellite hookup From nevermore ranch, Where calvin brain has promised to make an announcement That will rock the world.
I just love calvin brain and pinky.
Mmmhmm.
This is it, pinky.
People everywhere are drenched in my perfume.
Now, I need only say the word, And the world will be mine! Pinky? Hmm, which do you like better, brain, The green ribbon or the yellow tape measure? Whoo-Hoo! What difference does it make, pinky? The world is waiting.
Well, i need to look fashionable For my public, brain.
Zort! You know, something practical But still jaunty.
Stop it, pinky.
Just stop it! Aaahhhhh! [Crash.]
They've brainwashed you, pinky.
Really? Ooh, i didn't know i was brain-Dirty.
No, pinky, i mean you've fallen victim To the fashion industry.
They make these ridiculous pronouncements About what's hot and what's not.
And people run out and spend their hard-Earned money On things they don't really need.
It's all hokum and flim-Jammery.
But, brain! Throw away all this fashion junk.
Brain, the perfume.
The perfume is just a hoax, pinky.
Fashion is meaningless.
For all i care, you can wear clown pants.
[Gasp.]
[Crowd murmurs.]
And that's another behind-The-Scenes moment With elsa kitsch.
Oh, no.
Was that thing on? Mmm-Mmm.
I'm ruined.
So, fabrizio, Tell us about your new fall line.
Yes, elsa, Today's fashion must be big, yet small, Loud, yet soft you mean yes! Clown pants! Pinky, would you turn that off? We have to get ready for tomorrow night.
Why, brain? What are we going to do tomorrow night, Design a fetching little ensemble? No, pinky.
My designs are much bigger.
We're going to do the same thing we do every night.
Try to take over the world! they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain, brain warner bros.
Captioned by the national --Www.
Ncicap.
Org--
they're pinky and the brain yes, pinky and the brain one is a genius the other's insane they're laboratory mice their genes have been spliced they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain brain, brain, brain, brain, brain before each night is done their plan will be unfurled by the dawning of the sun they'll take over the world they're pinky and the brain yes, pinky and the brain their twilight campaign is easy to explain to prove their mousey worth they'll overthrow the earth they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain brain, brain, brain, brain Narf! warner bros.
[Tchaikovsky's waltz of the flowers playing.]
Pinky, how many times have i told you Not to frolic in the lab? Sorry, brain, but ballet gives you grace and poise And coordinaaaaa-- Do you realize what this gemination machine Will give us, pinky? Um, an excuse to look up the word "gemination"? No.
It will give us enough clones to take over the world! Now observe, while i use this photograph of myself To create the first clone.
He looks just like you, brain.
Yes.
And more importantly, he moves like me.
Now, follow So i can show you your task, pinky.
Yes! Yes! You make the clones While i teach them to dance.
Oof! More.
Brains: yes! Huh? Pinky.
Narf! Brain: i will create The world's most beloved celtic dance troupe.
Pinky: brain, i have a surprise.
Pinky, what have you done? Those aren't my dance steps.
It's left and-- Oof! Ooh! Dance! Dance! No! Brain clones: yes! Uhh uhhhh ohhhhh! [Gasps.]
[Giggling.]
Ha ha ha.
Poit.
Wake up, pinky.
What? Oh, brain, i had the most wonderful dream.
We were dancing and-- Silence.
We must prepare for tonight.
Why, brain? What are we going to do tonight? The same thing we do after every dance recital, pinky.
Try to take over the world.
they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain, brain Abandon your dignity.
I am a fish.
You are caught in a trap.
Peek-A-Boo! Hey! Somewhere beyond passion and obsession Lies subjugation.
Fishy, fishy, fishy! Narf! Whoa! Zort! Subjugation.
You will obey.
It's really stinky.
Ow! Well, pinky, what do you think of our commercial? What commercial? The one we were just watching.
Oh! Troz! You mean, the home movies? Ah, they make me nostalgic.
You were so different then.
That was last wednesday.
Those home movies were my skillful application Of the latest in subtle advertising techniques.
A commercial designed to convince an unsophisticated public That my new perfume will give them what they most desire.
Sand in their ears? No, pinky.
That exotic, mystical, alluring thing that everyone seeks from perfume.
Which is uh well, that really doesn't matter, pinky, Because what they will actually be buying Is a secret mind control formula.
I have isolated a precise combination of pheromones Which will stimulate certain subparietal receptor cells, Rendering the human brain Submissive to the exact frequencies of my voice.
So that people will actually like your singing? No, pinky.
This perfume will make its wearers Obey my every command, Allowing me to take over the world.
However, since i only have enough funds To show the commercial once at 3 a.
M.
On the weather channel, I'll have to find some other way Of bringing my perfume to the public's attention.
You could dress it up in pretty clothes And have it run screaming down the street.
Narf! It worked for me once.
Dress it up in pretty clothes And have it run screa-- Yes! Pinky, are you pondering what i'm pondering? Um, i think so, brain.
But 3 men in a tub? Ugh, that's unsanitary.
No.
We shall get fashion models To endorse my perfume, And it will fly off the shelf.
Now, come.
We're off to a place Where women are paid huge amounts of money To look beautiful and change their clothes frequently.
Charlie sheen's house? No, pinky, a fashion show.
Welcome to fashion expo, Where the world's top designers Are showing an explosion of color and shapes In their new spring collections.
Pinky: ooh, how exciting.
The world of fashion.
Maybe they'll give us their extra buttons For my collection of notions.
Pinky, you are one notion shy of a thought.
This is elsa kitsch reporting, And i'm here with designer fabrizio ditzio.
Fabrizio, what are your clothes saying to women this spring? For the spring, We say that the fashion can be bold and yet subtle And classic but still modern.
Are shapes important? Yes, elsa.
Today's woman is wanting a look That is fully cut and yet close to the body, With a silhouette that is long and sleek, Yet still short and sassy.
Oh, brain, i want to wear clothes.
These designers are so clever.
Don't be ridiculous.
This is classic double-Talk.
Round and yet square, Bright and yet dark.
Silly willy and yet fun, fun, fun! Zort! Whoa! Oomph! Pinky, you are stupid and yet imbecilic.
Coming up next, We'll see a garland of bright spring grays and browns As we go behind the scenes with giselle From the house of loco.
Brain: now come backstage, pinky.
We must interest the models in my new perfume, Which shouldn't be hard.
Apparently, they'll wear anything.
[French accent.]
claudia, darling, What a beautiful dress.
Now get out of those street clothes And put zis on.
Here we are, pinky.
Amid this chaos is the key to our future success.
Ooh.
Shiny buttons.
Ha ha ha ha! Fine, pinky.
Keep yourself amused, While i turn on my irresistible power of persuasion.
Excuse me.
May i speak with you for a moment? Woman: no.
Miss, uh, i'd like you to wear my new perfume.
Leave me alone, creep.
Pardon me, but would you be interested In endorsing a wonderful new fragrance? Why should i? Who are you? Actually, i'm a lab mouse Attempting to take over the world.
You won't get anywhere With a pathetic line like that.
Call my agent.
Aah! Apparently, her manners are no more developed Than her taste.
Buttons! Ha ha! Narf! Kate, what are you doing with that carrot stick? You want to get fat? Another behind-The-Scenes moment at fashion expo.
Heh heh heh.
Alors! I did not see you.
Tell me, giselle, Are shapes important? Everything is important, Down to zee last detail.
I'm ready.
Wait, zee outfit, she needs something.
Waa-Haaa! There.
Now, go! Go! Waaaah-Haah-Eeee! Whoa! [Crowd murmuring.]
Egad! Narf! Brain! Pinky? Brain! Aah! Aah! I can't see! How unusual.
What is going on? Who is responsible for zis? Ahem.
I am.
I'm sorry, brain.
I'm all a-Tangle.
Quiet, pinky.
I, calvin brain, Designed this stunning little ensemble To express, uh, uh that we are all a-Tangle in vanity and self-Image.
[All talking at once.]
Yes! Today, the world of fashion tomorrow the world! Welcome to stylish.
I'm elsa kitsch.
This week, designer calvin brain And new supermodel sensation pinky Literally set the fashion world on its ears.
With his infectious quelque chose And insouciant je ne sais quoi, Pinky is everyone's favorite cover boy.
Women everywhere are getting the pinky look.
High cheekbones are out, Big ears and buckteeth are in.
And designer calvin brain's pinky look Is all the rage on the paris runways.
In fact, aside from pinky, The hottest new male model is prince charles! Tell me, calvin brain, What is the secret to your look? Are shapes important? Yes, elsa.
You see, today's fashion Must be big and yet small, Flat and yet, uh, Poofy.
Dry and yet slightly moist.
With such keen insight, It's easy to see why calvin brain Has become an overnight superstar In the design world.
Thank you, elsa.
And now i'm taking my fashion career to new heights By introducing my own scent-- Subjugation by calvin brain.
Subjugation? Is that pinky's fragrance? His fragrance? It's his whole life.
You heard it here first.
Subjugation, the new scent by calvin brain.
Wear it and be humiliated.
Zort! I'm all a-Tangle.
i'm too famous for my narf! too famous for my narf! i've got a little scarf and i'm too happy for my zort! too happy for my zort! just watch me cavort That's the new video by, like, pinky 'n' all, And, like, guess what? Our guests on house of fads today Are, like, calvin brain and pinky 'n' all.
[Giggles.]
Narf! I'm all a-Tangle.
It's, like, way cool and stuff That, like, male fashion models Are finally getting some, like, respect.
Yes.
That's why it's so important to point out That my perfume, subjugation, Is actually a unisex scent.
So all of you, uh, chicks out there, Like, splash some on your dudes.
And all.
Totally cool! Totally cool! i'm a lab mouse i think it's so keen i do my little dance in a big limousine yeah, in my limo in my limo, yeah! i've got lots of cheese in my limo And so today i am launching Calvin brain kids.
Yay! Yay! Yay! That's doodle-Gummy gosh-All-Yummy-Liscious! Ha ha ha! Yay! Yay! Excuse me, Are shapes important? And don't forget, The most important part of the calvin brain kids' line Is subjugation perfume and bubble bath.
Troz! It looks just like me.
[Giggles.]
Children: yay! and i'm too happy for my troz too happy for my troz i love to lick my paws This is elsa kitsch Reporting live via worldwide satellite hookup From nevermore ranch, Where calvin brain has promised to make an announcement That will rock the world.
I just love calvin brain and pinky.
Mmmhmm.
This is it, pinky.
People everywhere are drenched in my perfume.
Now, I need only say the word, And the world will be mine! Pinky? Hmm, which do you like better, brain, The green ribbon or the yellow tape measure? Whoo-Hoo! What difference does it make, pinky? The world is waiting.
Well, i need to look fashionable For my public, brain.
Zort! You know, something practical But still jaunty.
Stop it, pinky.
Just stop it! Aaahhhhh! [Crash.]
They've brainwashed you, pinky.
Really? Ooh, i didn't know i was brain-Dirty.
No, pinky, i mean you've fallen victim To the fashion industry.
They make these ridiculous pronouncements About what's hot and what's not.
And people run out and spend their hard-Earned money On things they don't really need.
It's all hokum and flim-Jammery.
But, brain! Throw away all this fashion junk.
Brain, the perfume.
The perfume is just a hoax, pinky.
Fashion is meaningless.
For all i care, you can wear clown pants.
[Gasp.]
[Crowd murmurs.]
And that's another behind-The-Scenes moment With elsa kitsch.
Oh, no.
Was that thing on? Mmm-Mmm.
I'm ruined.
So, fabrizio, Tell us about your new fall line.
Yes, elsa, Today's fashion must be big, yet small, Loud, yet soft you mean yes! Clown pants! Pinky, would you turn that off? We have to get ready for tomorrow night.
Why, brain? What are we going to do tomorrow night, Design a fetching little ensemble? No, pinky.
My designs are much bigger.
We're going to do the same thing we do every night.
Try to take over the world! they're dinky they're pinky and the brain brain, brain, brain, brain warner bros.
Captioned by the national --Www.
Ncicap.
Org--