The X-Files s03e13 Episode Script
Syzygy
I remember me and him all the way back to kindergarten.
He was, uh- I don't know.
He was like a brother or something.
And we had some good times.
Good times that I'll never forget and junk like that.
And like now, we all got to stick to get her and protect each other, 'cause that's what Bruno would have wanted.
'Cause they say the cult is gonna come try and get more of us, and we cant let that happen.
So we gotta kick some butt.
We gotta kick some butt, Like I'm sure Bruno's doing in heaven right now.
I really dont know what to say.
Here he is.
Boom? Boom? - You okay? - Yeah.
That was beautiful.
Yep.
So did you hear who the cult is supposed to be coming after next? A blond virgin.
Come on.
I'll give you guys a ride home.
Your mom is always saying, "Wait until you're married.
Don't give it away.
" Yeah, and then some cult member wants to kidnap you and sacrifice you because you are a virgin.
God.
I mean, how do they even know if you really are a virgin? I don't know.
I don't even want to think about it.
You're not a virgin, are you, Boom? Uh, no.
You know, maybe if we weren't virgins, we wouldn't be so scared.
- Over here! - Hey! He found something.
Oh, God.
- Is he dead? - Yeah, looks like he hung himself.
- He loves me.
- He loves me not.
He loves me.
Not! The map says to turn right at the intersection.
The detective who contacted me told me to turn left.
- At the intersection? - At the stoplight.
This isn't a stoplight.
It's a stop sign.
I'm sure she meant stop sign.
Turn right.
What more can I say about the loss of a young man like Jay De Boom that the sadness in each of our own hearts does not express more poignantly? A few people have asked if they might come up and share some of their own personal remembrances of Jay.
Id like to invite them to come forward at this time and share some of those thoughts.
His friends called him Boom.
Quarterback of the football team.
He was well liked, a leader.
He was looking forward to college until he was found hanged in the woods two days ago.
It's the third death of a high school boy in as many months.
In your fax you said there were strong suspicions of a satanic cult at work.
That's the popular opinion around here.
Wildly popular actually.
Based on what evidence? Various eyewitness accounts of satanic rituals being conducted.
I remember me and Boom back to kindergarten.
He was- I don't know- Like a brother or something.
You have physical evidence of these rituals being conducted? No.
No, just the murder victims.
So you have nothing concrete to connect these things to satanists? If you detect a hint of skepticism or incredulity in Agent Scully's voice, it's because of the overwhelming evidence gathered by the F.
B.
I debunking virtually all claims of ritual abuse by satanic cults.
Is that true? Don't ask me.
Our research has proven that most of these accounts are false or imagined.
The trauma or mental illness that is often linked to satanic cults is the result of denial, hysteria and misplaced blame.
You're going to have a hard time convincing the locals of that, especially after hearing the stories of the two girls that were there the night Boom died.
- Who interviewed them? - I did.
- Together or separate? - Together.
Why? Then you have no way of determining whether or not their stories are fabricated.
No, no, these are good kids we're talking about.
Outstanding students-and the details they gave- I doubt they could have made them up.
Let me guess.
They told you about a wild beast entering in on a Black Mass, the drinking of blood, the sacrifice of an infant or a blond virgin.
Yeah.
That's right.
Excuse me.
Let me in there! - Where is she going? - You don't suppose she's a virgin, do you? I doubt she's even a blond.
Would you let me by? You can't go in! How long are we going to stand by and watch our children die while Satan's soldiers run free in this city? - Bob, this is no time- - No time? No time? Hey! Hey, hey, Bob! This is not the place for this.
My wife can't sleep at night! My kids say they can feel Satan's presence! We got to wake up and take action, people! We got to cast the devil out of our community! All right, everybody! Stay calm! Maybe were just imagining that.
My name is Terri Roberts.
I go to Grover Cleveland Alexander High School.
I'm a senior with a 3.
98 grade point average.
My name is Margi Kleinjan.
I go to Grover Cleveland Alexander High School.
I'm a senior with a 3.
75 grade point average.
I'm on the cheerleading yell squad with my best friend Terri.
I'm on the cheerleading yell squad with my best friend Margi.
We plan to go to college together in the fall.
Yeah.
Could you tell me again exactly what happened the night of Jay De Boom's death? Uh, Boom- jay was giving us a ride home in his truck when all of a sudden he swerved off the road.
Like he had been possessed or something.
He made us get out of the car and walk to a clearing where people were wearing black robes and holding black candles.
I couldn't see their faces underneath their hoods, but I knew they were up to no good.
How did you know they were up to no good? They were all standing around this altar, and one of them had a long knife with a snake's head on the handle with ruby eyes.
I thought we were dead because we'd heard they were going to sacrifice a blond virgin.
But instead they just brought out this little crying baby and put it on the altar.
The man with the knife started saying some kind of prayer.
He was chanting, and he was saying stuff about how they were going to sacrifice the baby, because it hadn't been christened yet and how they were going to bury it in a mass grave on the outskirts of town with all the other babies that they'd killed.
And- And- The whole group was chanting and saying things.
The man with the knife raised the knife up over the baby, and that's when Terri and I just ran for our lives.
The two stories are virtually identical.
The one corroborates the other.
I don't suppose there have been any actual reports of stolen infants or of mass graves being uncovered anywhere in town or that you found an altar or any other evidence of a Black Mass? No.
No, in fact, we haven't.
The problem is that the details of these accounts could have been taken from any news paper or magazine.
As horrific as they sound the stories that these girls told are common, even cliché.
If you detect a hint of impatience in Agent Scully's voice, that's because the F.
B.
I.
's study also found that in most cases, Like the McMartin preschool trial, witnesses were prompted in their statements by rumors or stories that were being circulated, and there was nothing to support them.
- How do you explain the burning coffin? - Don't ask me.
There have been incidents where the embalming fluid used to preserve the body have caused chemical reactions and produced heat and burning.
I see nothing here that would suggest otherwise.
What is that? - What's what? - That pattern on his chest.
Yeah, I see it.
It looks like a goat.
Some kind of horned beast.
- A horned beast? - Yeah.
Right here in a circle.
I think you guys are seeing something that isnt there.
No, no, right here.
Look.
You see that the horns are right there.
No, I don't see the horns right there.
I assume you'll call me if you need me for anything further.
If its no bother- If its not too big a deal, maybe you can get me a few photographs of that thing which bears absolutely no resemblance to a horned beast.
Sure.
Fine.
Whatever.
Oh, hi.
Uh, hi.
What are you doing with my cat? He was scratching to get in.
I thought with the threat of satanic animal sacrifices looming, maybe you should keep him inside.
I thought the F.
B.
I.
's research would have debunked that theory.
First off, I'd like to apologize for my partner's rude behavior.
She tends to be rather rigid, but rigid in a wonderful way, not like she was today.
Personally, I like to try to keep a more open mind.
So, what are you doing at my house? I was hoping you could help me solve the mystery of the horny beast.
Let me make sure I heard you right.
You say you see horns.
You don't see a goat here? Some kind of beast? This is a trick, right? To try and entrap me? - Nobody's trying to entrap you.
- Yeah, right.
There are a lot of loonies running around this town that'd like to think I'm a satanist.
But the truth is, I'm just a number cruncher, trying to make an honest living.
What do you think is going on? I think the whole town's lost its marbles.
I should have been the first to see it coming, but it's hard being a small business owner.
- You should see the paperwork.
- What do you mean, "seen it coming"? We're heading into a rare planetary alignment where Mercury, Mars and Uranus are extreme influences.
On what? Office hours are 9:00 to 5:00.
All major credit cards accepted.
All right.
Move back.
To your zones.
Clear! Shoot that ball! Shoot that ball! Let's shoot! - Craig Wilmore.
- Hate him, Roger.
Points though for improved dermatology, Gene.
- Hey! - Man! Come on! Can it be true that these people will soon be adults bringing new life into this world? I'm so depressed.
Hi, Scott.
Scott Simmons.
Babe-alicious in overtime, Gene.
Minus the Brenda appendage.
- Hate her.
- Hate her.
Wouldn't want to date her.
Hey.
Sorry.
- Hate him! - Hate him.
Wouldn't want to date him.
I'll get it.
Get the ball! Come on! Come on! Hurry up! - Hey! - Turn the lights on, will ya? What's going on? I can't get out! Somebody help me quick! - I can't get out of here! - Stop it! - Someone help me! - Grab on to it! - What happened? - Another young man has died.
An electrical surge caused a power failure, but somehow activated the motor that retracts the bleachers.
He got caught inside.
- Detective White, can I see you? - Excuse me.
I could hear him screaming, but- You weren't in your motel room.
I went to follow up a lead with Detective White.
- I see.
- You see what? We've been working together for, what, two years now? We have differing opinions, but I didn't expect you to ditch me.
- I didn't ditch you.
- Fine.
Whatever.
We got more trouble.
A mob has gathered on the Southside of town.
- Okay.
- Hey, Bob, we got company.
What's going on here, Bob? George Hunsaker's boy got a call from someone who said they knew the location of the mass grave.
You're destroying private property.
Stop digging.
Our children are dying! That does not give you the right to come out here and tear up Harvey Molitch's yard.
Maybe Harvey's got something to hide.
We got two kids who are prepared to say he took them on a camping trip and made them play naked movie star games! That man? Is he always that hysterical? No, Bob's our high school principal.
I've never heard him say a bad word about anyone.
This is called rumor panic.
It's when an antecedent event links up with a popular satanic cult myth, and it increases the tension in a community.
A villain or villains are singled out as the focus of the community's confusion and angst about unexplained events- Like the death of the high school boys.
There have been at least 20 incidents since 1983 from New York to Reno, Nevada.
Not one of them has turned up a single shred of evidence to support the wild allegations.
- I found bones! - She found bones! - Bones! Right there! - There are bones over there.
- All right, everybody! Stay back! - Stay back, folks.
They're in the bag.
Go ahead.
- No, you go ahead.
- No, no, no.
Be my guest.
I know how much you like snapping on the latex.
They're child's bones! What is that? What is that right there? - Is that lettering? - " R.
W.
G.
" Dick Godfrey.
That bag belongs to Dr.
Godfrey.
He's the baby killer! Who's Dr.
Godfrey? He's the town pediatrician.
He's the killer! Come on out, Godfrey! Come on out! We know you're in there! Godfrey! He's home! He's in there! Come on out, you baby killer! Let me get this straight for the record.
You haven't seen the bag in a year, and you sold it at a garage sale? To a young girl, one of the Roberts family.
They live a few doors down.
Why was it filled with bones and buried in a field? I have no idea.
The people of this town seem to think you do.
Would you be willing to take a lie detector test? You can go now, Dr.
Godfrey.
I don't think well be needing you any further.
- Your story checked out.
- Thank God.
The bones turned out to be the skeletal remains not of an infant, but of a beloved 14-year-old Lhasa apso, formerly known as Mr.
Tippy.
Mr.
Tippy! This may not be any time to mention it, but someone is wearing my favorite perfume.
Can I have a word with you? - This has gone on far enough.
- What? I am not going to be humiliated by you, in front of you or by having to bring a teenage girl in, on her birthday of all days, to identify the bones of her dead dog, Mr.
Tippy.
I see no reason to pursue this case any further.
Not only that, I find your conduct and comportment in this investigation not just alarming, but highly objectionable.
- What are you doing? - Must be Detective White.
If thats the reason we're sticking around, that's your business.
What? What are you talking about? Detective White.
We came down here because of three unexplained deaths.
Detective White is just trying to solve them.
She could use our help.
Well, you two seem to have a certain simpatico.
I'm going back to Washington in the morning.
~Lay me down~ - ~Down~ - Whoo, whoo! ~Lay me down Lay me down~ - ~Lay me down~~ - Go, girl.
Get down.
- Go, Terri! - Whoo! Yeah! - Ha, ha! - Whoo! What are you going to ask, Brenda? Who am I going to marry? - "S"! - Come on.
Whats next? 'A "? "T"? What? 'A "? "N"? Satan? Brenda? One bloody Mary, two bloody Mary, three bloody Mary, - four bloody Mary- - What are you doing? You just close your eyes and count to 13 and bloody Mary appears in the mirror.
- Come on in, Brenda.
- No, thank you.
Five bloody Mary, six bloody Mary, seven bloody Mary- - Turn it off.
Turn if off.
- What is that? ** " Detective White could use our help.
Shes just trying to solve this case.
" Detective White.
Can I come in? What happened? I found that on my front doorstep.
If they're not satanists, who are they? - What are you doing? - Nothing.
You've been drinking.
Yes, I have, which is funny because I usually- I normally never- I don't drink.
Oh.
You know, I don't feel like going home.
Do you mind if I slept here? Actually, I'm sure I could get you another room.
Maybe we can solve the mystery of the horny beast.
Maybe we should just watch some television.
There's a movie on TV.
Actually, it's the same movie on every channel.
Weird.
I like weird.
I feel weird.
Mul- There's been another death.
Was it a murder? A high school girl was impaled by flying glass from a bathroom mirror.
- Let me drive.
- I'm driving.
- It's not what you think.
- I didn't see anything anyway.
- Will you let me drive? - I'm driving.
Why do you always have to drive? Because youre the guy, the big, macho man? No, I was just never sure your little feet could reach the pedals.
Will you go with her, please? Thank you.
" Big, macho man.
" Hey.
Loss of appetite.
That's not a good sign.
I'd like to be alone.
Well, you got your wish.
What happened to you guys? - You used to be- - Look, Scott, we're not dressed like this for the funeral.
We're here to make you feel better tonight.
Carpe P.
M.
Hate him.
Hate him! When we were here before- - I'm just waiting for authorization.
- I'm a federal agent.
Last I heard the federal government couldn't pay its bills.
Okay, you're good for up to 300 bucks.
- How can I help you? - You said you knew why people were behaving so strangely here.
The same reason my dog's been trying to mate with the barbecue for the last two months.
You said it was planetary.
Once every 84 years, Mercury, Mars and Uranus come into conjunction.
Only this year, Uranus is in the house of Aquarius.
That's a bad thing? Bad like an Irwin Allen movie.
Things are going to fall out of the sky.
Disaster lies in wait, especially here.
- Why here? - We're in a geological vortex, a high intensity meridian- a cosmic "G" spot- all culminating on January 12 when the planets come into perfect alignment, which would be today.
- Why is this affecting everyone? - Some people more than others.
Relationships are going to suck.
Significant dates can exaggerate the effects.
- What if today was my birthday? - Then I'd say happy birthday.
Unless, of course, you were born in 1979, and then I'd call the police.
Youd have a Jupiter-Uranus opposition forming what's called a grand square where all the planets align into a cross.
All the energy of the cosmos would be focused on you.
You don't have to be alone tonight.
What are you doin'? The insensitivity to your pain was too much for me to bear.
- So I- - What? So you what? So you blew me off so you could snag some shoulder time with rude boy.
Back off, Terri.
Happy birthday, bitch.
Right back at you.
- Youre bleeding.
- So are you.
You killed him.
What do you mean, I killed him? You killed him! I didn't kill him.
Terri? Oh! Oh, my God.
Come on.
Over here.
I'll let you fill in the amount.
Mulder.
I know who the killer is.
I know who did it all.
- Who is this? - Margi Kleinjan.
Where are you, Margi? just tell me where you are.
I don't know what you think you're doing, but I suggest you put that gun down, sir, or I'm going to have to arrest you.
We're not standing around anymore, waiting for answers.
We're taking this situation into our own hands.
You can't go walking down the middle of the street carrying a loaded weapon.
- It's against the law.
- Not if I'm hunting it's not.
Hunting satanists.
There are no satanists here.
Then who killed those kids? And who killed all these birds? Somebody help me! I know who the killer is.
I know who did it all.
All the murders.
Come on, Margi.
Let's get you out of here.
- She killed him.
- Who? Terri.
She killed all of them.
She killed all of the high school boys? And Brenda Summerfield.
How did she do it? I think she's possessed or something.
She killed Scott Simmons tonight with a garage door spring.
I don't know how she does it.
I think- I think she's- I think she's evil.
She tricked Boom into going up on that cliff, and then she pushed him off and laughed about it.
just like she did Eric Bauer the other night in the gym.
When all the lights went out and she knew that he was trapped underneath the bleachers, she could hear him screaming, but she wouldn't make it stop.
Why didnt you stop her, Terri? Why didnt you tell anybody? Because- Because I was afraid of her.
Because she was my best friend.
Best friends are supposed to stick together, right? Scully! Scully, it's me.
Where are you? I'm at a crime scene, a new one.
I think I have a solid lead on these deaths.
I'm way ahead of you, Mulder.
I've got a suspect I want to bring in.
- Who's that? - Margi Kleinjan.
Hold on a second.
- Margi Kleinjan? - That's right.
Her friend gave us a statement.
Actually, I'm way ahead of you.
I'm with Margi.
She gave me a statement implicating her friend.
- Who? - Terri.
Actually, I'm way ahead of you, because I'm with Terri now.
- You're what? - I've got your suspect, and you've got mine.
Why does that make sense to me at this point? I don't think this has anything to do with any cult.
I want to get them both in and get a formal statement and clear this thing up, okay? - Scully? - Sure.
Fine.
Whatever.
All right, Steve.
This is what we have.
Let me take a look at that.
Wait right here.
Detective White's cat? "Keystone Kops" Theme.]
Steve, what was that? It's moving! - Hey, girlfriend.
- Hey.
Get her out of here.
Out of my way.
- What the hell's going on here? - Something cosmic.
Oh! - They're in there.
- Put that gun down! - Where is she? - Who? - The girl, the guilty one.
- They're both in there.
I think wed like to see for ourselves.
I think were all tired of waiting for law enforcement to bring justice in our city! - Yeah! - No! Open the door.
You don't want to go in there.
Excuse me.
Gladly.
We are but visitors on this rock, hurtling through time and space at 66,000milesanhour, tethered to a burning sphere by an invisible force in an unfathomable universe.
This most of us take for granted, while refusing to believe these forces have anymore effect on us than a butterfly beating its wings half way around the world.
Or that two girls born on the same date at the same time and the same place might not find themselves the unfortunate focus of similar unseen forces, converging like the planets themselves into burning pinpoints of cosmic energy, whose absolute gravity would threaten to swallow and consume everything in its path.
Or maybe the answer lies even further from our grasp.
I think it was Satan.
Yes, sir.
Satan it was.
- You ready? - You're the driver.
Ah, Scully, if Im not mistaken, were going to be taking a left up here.
There's an intersection up here.
Youre going to want to- Scully, you're going to want to- - You just ran a stop sign back there, Scully.
- Shut up, Mulder.
He was, uh- I don't know.
He was like a brother or something.
And we had some good times.
Good times that I'll never forget and junk like that.
And like now, we all got to stick to get her and protect each other, 'cause that's what Bruno would have wanted.
'Cause they say the cult is gonna come try and get more of us, and we cant let that happen.
So we gotta kick some butt.
We gotta kick some butt, Like I'm sure Bruno's doing in heaven right now.
I really dont know what to say.
Here he is.
Boom? Boom? - You okay? - Yeah.
That was beautiful.
Yep.
So did you hear who the cult is supposed to be coming after next? A blond virgin.
Come on.
I'll give you guys a ride home.
Your mom is always saying, "Wait until you're married.
Don't give it away.
" Yeah, and then some cult member wants to kidnap you and sacrifice you because you are a virgin.
God.
I mean, how do they even know if you really are a virgin? I don't know.
I don't even want to think about it.
You're not a virgin, are you, Boom? Uh, no.
You know, maybe if we weren't virgins, we wouldn't be so scared.
- Over here! - Hey! He found something.
Oh, God.
- Is he dead? - Yeah, looks like he hung himself.
- He loves me.
- He loves me not.
He loves me.
Not! The map says to turn right at the intersection.
The detective who contacted me told me to turn left.
- At the intersection? - At the stoplight.
This isn't a stoplight.
It's a stop sign.
I'm sure she meant stop sign.
Turn right.
What more can I say about the loss of a young man like Jay De Boom that the sadness in each of our own hearts does not express more poignantly? A few people have asked if they might come up and share some of their own personal remembrances of Jay.
Id like to invite them to come forward at this time and share some of those thoughts.
His friends called him Boom.
Quarterback of the football team.
He was well liked, a leader.
He was looking forward to college until he was found hanged in the woods two days ago.
It's the third death of a high school boy in as many months.
In your fax you said there were strong suspicions of a satanic cult at work.
That's the popular opinion around here.
Wildly popular actually.
Based on what evidence? Various eyewitness accounts of satanic rituals being conducted.
I remember me and Boom back to kindergarten.
He was- I don't know- Like a brother or something.
You have physical evidence of these rituals being conducted? No.
No, just the murder victims.
So you have nothing concrete to connect these things to satanists? If you detect a hint of skepticism or incredulity in Agent Scully's voice, it's because of the overwhelming evidence gathered by the F.
B.
I debunking virtually all claims of ritual abuse by satanic cults.
Is that true? Don't ask me.
Our research has proven that most of these accounts are false or imagined.
The trauma or mental illness that is often linked to satanic cults is the result of denial, hysteria and misplaced blame.
You're going to have a hard time convincing the locals of that, especially after hearing the stories of the two girls that were there the night Boom died.
- Who interviewed them? - I did.
- Together or separate? - Together.
Why? Then you have no way of determining whether or not their stories are fabricated.
No, no, these are good kids we're talking about.
Outstanding students-and the details they gave- I doubt they could have made them up.
Let me guess.
They told you about a wild beast entering in on a Black Mass, the drinking of blood, the sacrifice of an infant or a blond virgin.
Yeah.
That's right.
Excuse me.
Let me in there! - Where is she going? - You don't suppose she's a virgin, do you? I doubt she's even a blond.
Would you let me by? You can't go in! How long are we going to stand by and watch our children die while Satan's soldiers run free in this city? - Bob, this is no time- - No time? No time? Hey! Hey, hey, Bob! This is not the place for this.
My wife can't sleep at night! My kids say they can feel Satan's presence! We got to wake up and take action, people! We got to cast the devil out of our community! All right, everybody! Stay calm! Maybe were just imagining that.
My name is Terri Roberts.
I go to Grover Cleveland Alexander High School.
I'm a senior with a 3.
98 grade point average.
My name is Margi Kleinjan.
I go to Grover Cleveland Alexander High School.
I'm a senior with a 3.
75 grade point average.
I'm on the cheerleading yell squad with my best friend Terri.
I'm on the cheerleading yell squad with my best friend Margi.
We plan to go to college together in the fall.
Yeah.
Could you tell me again exactly what happened the night of Jay De Boom's death? Uh, Boom- jay was giving us a ride home in his truck when all of a sudden he swerved off the road.
Like he had been possessed or something.
He made us get out of the car and walk to a clearing where people were wearing black robes and holding black candles.
I couldn't see their faces underneath their hoods, but I knew they were up to no good.
How did you know they were up to no good? They were all standing around this altar, and one of them had a long knife with a snake's head on the handle with ruby eyes.
I thought we were dead because we'd heard they were going to sacrifice a blond virgin.
But instead they just brought out this little crying baby and put it on the altar.
The man with the knife started saying some kind of prayer.
He was chanting, and he was saying stuff about how they were going to sacrifice the baby, because it hadn't been christened yet and how they were going to bury it in a mass grave on the outskirts of town with all the other babies that they'd killed.
And- And- The whole group was chanting and saying things.
The man with the knife raised the knife up over the baby, and that's when Terri and I just ran for our lives.
The two stories are virtually identical.
The one corroborates the other.
I don't suppose there have been any actual reports of stolen infants or of mass graves being uncovered anywhere in town or that you found an altar or any other evidence of a Black Mass? No.
No, in fact, we haven't.
The problem is that the details of these accounts could have been taken from any news paper or magazine.
As horrific as they sound the stories that these girls told are common, even cliché.
If you detect a hint of impatience in Agent Scully's voice, that's because the F.
B.
I.
's study also found that in most cases, Like the McMartin preschool trial, witnesses were prompted in their statements by rumors or stories that were being circulated, and there was nothing to support them.
- How do you explain the burning coffin? - Don't ask me.
There have been incidents where the embalming fluid used to preserve the body have caused chemical reactions and produced heat and burning.
I see nothing here that would suggest otherwise.
What is that? - What's what? - That pattern on his chest.
Yeah, I see it.
It looks like a goat.
Some kind of horned beast.
- A horned beast? - Yeah.
Right here in a circle.
I think you guys are seeing something that isnt there.
No, no, right here.
Look.
You see that the horns are right there.
No, I don't see the horns right there.
I assume you'll call me if you need me for anything further.
If its no bother- If its not too big a deal, maybe you can get me a few photographs of that thing which bears absolutely no resemblance to a horned beast.
Sure.
Fine.
Whatever.
Oh, hi.
Uh, hi.
What are you doing with my cat? He was scratching to get in.
I thought with the threat of satanic animal sacrifices looming, maybe you should keep him inside.
I thought the F.
B.
I.
's research would have debunked that theory.
First off, I'd like to apologize for my partner's rude behavior.
She tends to be rather rigid, but rigid in a wonderful way, not like she was today.
Personally, I like to try to keep a more open mind.
So, what are you doing at my house? I was hoping you could help me solve the mystery of the horny beast.
Let me make sure I heard you right.
You say you see horns.
You don't see a goat here? Some kind of beast? This is a trick, right? To try and entrap me? - Nobody's trying to entrap you.
- Yeah, right.
There are a lot of loonies running around this town that'd like to think I'm a satanist.
But the truth is, I'm just a number cruncher, trying to make an honest living.
What do you think is going on? I think the whole town's lost its marbles.
I should have been the first to see it coming, but it's hard being a small business owner.
- You should see the paperwork.
- What do you mean, "seen it coming"? We're heading into a rare planetary alignment where Mercury, Mars and Uranus are extreme influences.
On what? Office hours are 9:00 to 5:00.
All major credit cards accepted.
All right.
Move back.
To your zones.
Clear! Shoot that ball! Shoot that ball! Let's shoot! - Craig Wilmore.
- Hate him, Roger.
Points though for improved dermatology, Gene.
- Hey! - Man! Come on! Can it be true that these people will soon be adults bringing new life into this world? I'm so depressed.
Hi, Scott.
Scott Simmons.
Babe-alicious in overtime, Gene.
Minus the Brenda appendage.
- Hate her.
- Hate her.
Wouldn't want to date her.
Hey.
Sorry.
- Hate him! - Hate him.
Wouldn't want to date him.
I'll get it.
Get the ball! Come on! Come on! Hurry up! - Hey! - Turn the lights on, will ya? What's going on? I can't get out! Somebody help me quick! - I can't get out of here! - Stop it! - Someone help me! - Grab on to it! - What happened? - Another young man has died.
An electrical surge caused a power failure, but somehow activated the motor that retracts the bleachers.
He got caught inside.
- Detective White, can I see you? - Excuse me.
I could hear him screaming, but- You weren't in your motel room.
I went to follow up a lead with Detective White.
- I see.
- You see what? We've been working together for, what, two years now? We have differing opinions, but I didn't expect you to ditch me.
- I didn't ditch you.
- Fine.
Whatever.
We got more trouble.
A mob has gathered on the Southside of town.
- Okay.
- Hey, Bob, we got company.
What's going on here, Bob? George Hunsaker's boy got a call from someone who said they knew the location of the mass grave.
You're destroying private property.
Stop digging.
Our children are dying! That does not give you the right to come out here and tear up Harvey Molitch's yard.
Maybe Harvey's got something to hide.
We got two kids who are prepared to say he took them on a camping trip and made them play naked movie star games! That man? Is he always that hysterical? No, Bob's our high school principal.
I've never heard him say a bad word about anyone.
This is called rumor panic.
It's when an antecedent event links up with a popular satanic cult myth, and it increases the tension in a community.
A villain or villains are singled out as the focus of the community's confusion and angst about unexplained events- Like the death of the high school boys.
There have been at least 20 incidents since 1983 from New York to Reno, Nevada.
Not one of them has turned up a single shred of evidence to support the wild allegations.
- I found bones! - She found bones! - Bones! Right there! - There are bones over there.
- All right, everybody! Stay back! - Stay back, folks.
They're in the bag.
Go ahead.
- No, you go ahead.
- No, no, no.
Be my guest.
I know how much you like snapping on the latex.
They're child's bones! What is that? What is that right there? - Is that lettering? - " R.
W.
G.
" Dick Godfrey.
That bag belongs to Dr.
Godfrey.
He's the baby killer! Who's Dr.
Godfrey? He's the town pediatrician.
He's the killer! Come on out, Godfrey! Come on out! We know you're in there! Godfrey! He's home! He's in there! Come on out, you baby killer! Let me get this straight for the record.
You haven't seen the bag in a year, and you sold it at a garage sale? To a young girl, one of the Roberts family.
They live a few doors down.
Why was it filled with bones and buried in a field? I have no idea.
The people of this town seem to think you do.
Would you be willing to take a lie detector test? You can go now, Dr.
Godfrey.
I don't think well be needing you any further.
- Your story checked out.
- Thank God.
The bones turned out to be the skeletal remains not of an infant, but of a beloved 14-year-old Lhasa apso, formerly known as Mr.
Tippy.
Mr.
Tippy! This may not be any time to mention it, but someone is wearing my favorite perfume.
Can I have a word with you? - This has gone on far enough.
- What? I am not going to be humiliated by you, in front of you or by having to bring a teenage girl in, on her birthday of all days, to identify the bones of her dead dog, Mr.
Tippy.
I see no reason to pursue this case any further.
Not only that, I find your conduct and comportment in this investigation not just alarming, but highly objectionable.
- What are you doing? - Must be Detective White.
If thats the reason we're sticking around, that's your business.
What? What are you talking about? Detective White.
We came down here because of three unexplained deaths.
Detective White is just trying to solve them.
She could use our help.
Well, you two seem to have a certain simpatico.
I'm going back to Washington in the morning.
~Lay me down~ - ~Down~ - Whoo, whoo! ~Lay me down Lay me down~ - ~Lay me down~~ - Go, girl.
Get down.
- Go, Terri! - Whoo! Yeah! - Ha, ha! - Whoo! What are you going to ask, Brenda? Who am I going to marry? - "S"! - Come on.
Whats next? 'A "? "T"? What? 'A "? "N"? Satan? Brenda? One bloody Mary, two bloody Mary, three bloody Mary, - four bloody Mary- - What are you doing? You just close your eyes and count to 13 and bloody Mary appears in the mirror.
- Come on in, Brenda.
- No, thank you.
Five bloody Mary, six bloody Mary, seven bloody Mary- - Turn it off.
Turn if off.
- What is that? ** " Detective White could use our help.
Shes just trying to solve this case.
" Detective White.
Can I come in? What happened? I found that on my front doorstep.
If they're not satanists, who are they? - What are you doing? - Nothing.
You've been drinking.
Yes, I have, which is funny because I usually- I normally never- I don't drink.
Oh.
You know, I don't feel like going home.
Do you mind if I slept here? Actually, I'm sure I could get you another room.
Maybe we can solve the mystery of the horny beast.
Maybe we should just watch some television.
There's a movie on TV.
Actually, it's the same movie on every channel.
Weird.
I like weird.
I feel weird.
Mul- There's been another death.
Was it a murder? A high school girl was impaled by flying glass from a bathroom mirror.
- Let me drive.
- I'm driving.
- It's not what you think.
- I didn't see anything anyway.
- Will you let me drive? - I'm driving.
Why do you always have to drive? Because youre the guy, the big, macho man? No, I was just never sure your little feet could reach the pedals.
Will you go with her, please? Thank you.
" Big, macho man.
" Hey.
Loss of appetite.
That's not a good sign.
I'd like to be alone.
Well, you got your wish.
What happened to you guys? - You used to be- - Look, Scott, we're not dressed like this for the funeral.
We're here to make you feel better tonight.
Carpe P.
M.
Hate him.
Hate him! When we were here before- - I'm just waiting for authorization.
- I'm a federal agent.
Last I heard the federal government couldn't pay its bills.
Okay, you're good for up to 300 bucks.
- How can I help you? - You said you knew why people were behaving so strangely here.
The same reason my dog's been trying to mate with the barbecue for the last two months.
You said it was planetary.
Once every 84 years, Mercury, Mars and Uranus come into conjunction.
Only this year, Uranus is in the house of Aquarius.
That's a bad thing? Bad like an Irwin Allen movie.
Things are going to fall out of the sky.
Disaster lies in wait, especially here.
- Why here? - We're in a geological vortex, a high intensity meridian- a cosmic "G" spot- all culminating on January 12 when the planets come into perfect alignment, which would be today.
- Why is this affecting everyone? - Some people more than others.
Relationships are going to suck.
Significant dates can exaggerate the effects.
- What if today was my birthday? - Then I'd say happy birthday.
Unless, of course, you were born in 1979, and then I'd call the police.
Youd have a Jupiter-Uranus opposition forming what's called a grand square where all the planets align into a cross.
All the energy of the cosmos would be focused on you.
You don't have to be alone tonight.
What are you doin'? The insensitivity to your pain was too much for me to bear.
- So I- - What? So you what? So you blew me off so you could snag some shoulder time with rude boy.
Back off, Terri.
Happy birthday, bitch.
Right back at you.
- Youre bleeding.
- So are you.
You killed him.
What do you mean, I killed him? You killed him! I didn't kill him.
Terri? Oh! Oh, my God.
Come on.
Over here.
I'll let you fill in the amount.
Mulder.
I know who the killer is.
I know who did it all.
- Who is this? - Margi Kleinjan.
Where are you, Margi? just tell me where you are.
I don't know what you think you're doing, but I suggest you put that gun down, sir, or I'm going to have to arrest you.
We're not standing around anymore, waiting for answers.
We're taking this situation into our own hands.
You can't go walking down the middle of the street carrying a loaded weapon.
- It's against the law.
- Not if I'm hunting it's not.
Hunting satanists.
There are no satanists here.
Then who killed those kids? And who killed all these birds? Somebody help me! I know who the killer is.
I know who did it all.
All the murders.
Come on, Margi.
Let's get you out of here.
- She killed him.
- Who? Terri.
She killed all of them.
She killed all of the high school boys? And Brenda Summerfield.
How did she do it? I think she's possessed or something.
She killed Scott Simmons tonight with a garage door spring.
I don't know how she does it.
I think- I think she's- I think she's evil.
She tricked Boom into going up on that cliff, and then she pushed him off and laughed about it.
just like she did Eric Bauer the other night in the gym.
When all the lights went out and she knew that he was trapped underneath the bleachers, she could hear him screaming, but she wouldn't make it stop.
Why didnt you stop her, Terri? Why didnt you tell anybody? Because- Because I was afraid of her.
Because she was my best friend.
Best friends are supposed to stick together, right? Scully! Scully, it's me.
Where are you? I'm at a crime scene, a new one.
I think I have a solid lead on these deaths.
I'm way ahead of you, Mulder.
I've got a suspect I want to bring in.
- Who's that? - Margi Kleinjan.
Hold on a second.
- Margi Kleinjan? - That's right.
Her friend gave us a statement.
Actually, I'm way ahead of you.
I'm with Margi.
She gave me a statement implicating her friend.
- Who? - Terri.
Actually, I'm way ahead of you, because I'm with Terri now.
- You're what? - I've got your suspect, and you've got mine.
Why does that make sense to me at this point? I don't think this has anything to do with any cult.
I want to get them both in and get a formal statement and clear this thing up, okay? - Scully? - Sure.
Fine.
Whatever.
All right, Steve.
This is what we have.
Let me take a look at that.
Wait right here.
Detective White's cat? "Keystone Kops" Theme.]
Steve, what was that? It's moving! - Hey, girlfriend.
- Hey.
Get her out of here.
Out of my way.
- What the hell's going on here? - Something cosmic.
Oh! - They're in there.
- Put that gun down! - Where is she? - Who? - The girl, the guilty one.
- They're both in there.
I think wed like to see for ourselves.
I think were all tired of waiting for law enforcement to bring justice in our city! - Yeah! - No! Open the door.
You don't want to go in there.
Excuse me.
Gladly.
We are but visitors on this rock, hurtling through time and space at 66,000milesanhour, tethered to a burning sphere by an invisible force in an unfathomable universe.
This most of us take for granted, while refusing to believe these forces have anymore effect on us than a butterfly beating its wings half way around the world.
Or that two girls born on the same date at the same time and the same place might not find themselves the unfortunate focus of similar unseen forces, converging like the planets themselves into burning pinpoints of cosmic energy, whose absolute gravity would threaten to swallow and consume everything in its path.
Or maybe the answer lies even further from our grasp.
I think it was Satan.
Yes, sir.
Satan it was.
- You ready? - You're the driver.
Ah, Scully, if Im not mistaken, were going to be taking a left up here.
There's an intersection up here.
Youre going to want to- Scully, you're going to want to- - You just ran a stop sign back there, Scully.
- Shut up, Mulder.