Lois and Clark: The New Adventures of Superman s03e14 Episode Script
Tempus Anyone?
-I can't believe it's next week.
-I know.
Is this the absolute total final guest count? Funny you should mention that because I ran into an old friend last night.
-Who? -Lana Lang.
Oh, an old girlfriend.
-You're getting that sound in your voice.
-What sound? But any second, claws are gonna pop out of your fingers.
I'm gonna have to get you a saucer of milk.
Meow.
She's not worth it.
We dated in high school.
Oh, a Smallville girl here in the big city.
And? And I told her I was getting married.
Smart.
And she was? She was really happy for me.
So happy she'd like to come to the wedding? How did you know? -How did she take it? -What? When you said no.
-Clark? -Well, you have to know Lana.
No.
No, I don't, interestingly enough.
She's kind of insistent, sort of just steamrolls through things so I didn't say she could come -she sort of said she could come.
-Let me get this straight.
You're Superman.
And your high school girlfriend can push you around.
-Oh, God.
I-- -Help! Help! The bank's being robbed! -Speaking of Superman.
-Go.
We'll finish this at the office.
-Okay.
-Hey, be careful.
-What happened? -Some rocket came through the window.
Set off gas.
Hi, Lois.
Remember me? No, l-- How about now? It's a private joke.
Lois, after all we meant to each other, I'm still not ringing any bells? This guy comes in with big guns, starts shooting up the place.
-He took gold and jewels.
-Where did he go? I suppose time travel can be a real brain drain.
Care to drop your things and step into the sled here? Step on or be carried, makes no difference to me.
It's always something.
If I were you, I'd put that gun down and work on my manners.
Really.
Why? Lois? Lois! Lois! Miss Lane? My name is Wells, Herbert George Wells.
Actually, we've met but I doubt you'd remember.
You're the second person to say that to me.
What is going on, is this some kind of? Did you say Herbert George? H.
G.
Wells.
The writer who died a long time ago.
Oh, my God, I'm dead.
-No, no, no.
-What do you mean, "no"? I'm looking at my grave with a dead writer.
Miss Lane, I assure you, you are very much alive and so am l.
Let's sit.
Please.
Careful.
Now I'm going to tell you something.
And as I do, you will begin to remember, like a dream recalled.
Now close your eyes and let the images unspool.
We met on an extraordinary adventure.
Before I was this elderly gentleman you see before you I was a time traveler.
And I had journeyed into the future seeking utopia, but found instead T empus.
A violent psychotic with a bitter hatred for Superman.
He tried to kill Clark Kent as a baby hoping to change future history.
And you stopped him.
I remember.
You're H.
G.
Wells.
I know you.
But you're.
I don't wanna be rude, but you're a little-- Older.
Seventeen years.
The me you met was from 1 899.
The me you now see before you is from 1916.
-ls it okay if I get a headache? -That's quite all right.
After our escapade, Tempus escaped and built his own time machine.
He did something rather unique with it.
Here, let me show you.
-It's Metropolis.
-Look closer.
Is it not more dirty than clean, more dark than light? -ls this the future? -Oh, no.
Very much the present.
But an alternate present.
"President Heston"? Charlton Heston is President? What is this place? -A parallel dimension.
-What? A second Metropolis, a sibling reality coexisting with our own hidden from us by a curtain of space, now parted.
A thousand details alike, and a thousand as different as the infinite choices in a moment.
So in plain English Ben-Hur is President and I'm worm food.
I'm getting married next week.
Why does this happen to me? No.
But I told him that he wasn't gonna be there.
Do I wanna know why so many people are wearing guns or is that just gonna upset me more? Well, from what little I can gather, people are frightened, cynical have no faith society can protect them.
That, and a certain someone is making firearms affordable and attractive.
-And that's not the worst part.
-I know.
Who is this "enemy"? What is he after, why'd he put us here? Like you, I was kidnapped and dropped here without a clue as to why.
Well, if this place is the same but different maybe there's a Clark here.
-And if there's a Clark.
-There's a Superman.
How do you score this kind of swag? There's not a cop after you? Not a bank with your picture in it? Major Domo, can you keep a secret? -Sure.
-I have an inter-dimensional transport.
Right here in this building actually.
And every day I pop out of this universe into an alternate one take what I need, and then zip back here where I'm not wanted for so much as jaywalking.
Cretins.
Oh, Mr.
Tempus, you kill me, I swear.
If there's anybody funnier in this whole world.
It's no wonder you wanna be on the TV.
No, I don't wanna be on TV to entertain, Major Domo.
Anymore than I want people to know that I own this television station.
You see, TV is power.
The power to lull, to pacify.
And then when all eyes are glazed and all minds are jelly the power to take.
The power to hold the world in your fist.
Which is exactly what I intend to do when I'm elected mayor.
-Yes? -Wells and Lane have linked up.
Looking very buddy-buddy.
-Where are they going? -Looks like the Daily Planet.
No doubt in search of a superhero.
I love predictable behavior.
Clark's gotta be going out of his mind.
-Come on, hand it over.
-All right, here you go.
We have got to get back.
Our only hope is to get Tempus' machine.
To that end I have begun piecing something together out of odds and ends.
Now, it's not finished, but if I can get it to work it should home in on the flux capacitor of Tempus' dimensional transport assuming it has one.
Well, at least this world isn't completely nuts.
There may even be some hope.
More than hope.
Clark! Clark, over here, it's me! -Go get them, Ma! -Come back here! Get away! Well, things can't be all bad.
Come on.
If he's anything like my Clark, he'll be back inside making some lame excuse.
Who's been messing with my poster? That's not my tie.
That's not my coat.
And that hair, I look like a Malvolian Dan Rather.
All right, now.
Speak up.
-Who messed with my poster? -The closer we get to the bullpen the more familiar things get.
Who turned me into a pretty boy here? I did.
Mr.
Olsen.
The polls have showed you're skewing a little old.
So I had a talk with your campaign manager and we decided to run this new poster.
-I like it.
-Yes, sir.
But Mr.
Olsen-- -I don't believe this.
-I'm just an old Memphis word stringer and that ain't me.
It's a better you, all right? It's a younger you.
When you jumped into this race, you were way ahead and I wanna keep you there.
My paper has a lot on the line for you, White.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Lois! Is that you, honey? -It's me.
-I don't know how this could be.
I don't care.
I'm happier than a preacher in a month of Sundays.
Where have you been? Honey, what happened to your hair? -Oh, well, l-- -Miss Lane? James Olsen.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Mr.
Olsen is our new owner.
-Owner.
Really? -Y es.
A whiz kid of the computer world.
Decided to roll the dice on our rag.
White talks about you all the time.
He said you disappeared in the Congo? The Congo.
The gun-running story three years ago.
Right, I did.
-For a while, but-- -Lois.
I must've sent an army of people over there looking for you, honey.
-What happened? -What happened is.
I'm fine.
Obviously.
-Thanks to my friend here, Mr.
Wells.
-Hello.
Heruns a mission.
You were in a mission for three years? I was sick.
-Too sick to make a phone call? -Coma.
Absolutely incapacitated.
Just came out of it yesterday.
First thing she said to me was, "Herbie, get me to the Planet.
" -Naturally, I wondered what planet.
-Clark? -Then she explained to me-- -Oh, Clark, I am so glad to see you.
You and Superman.
Excuse me, miss.
But who are you and what's Superman? Clark, who's this? I have no idea.
Well, I guess she knows you.
So she ought to know me.
I'm Lana Lang, Mr.
Kent's fiancee.
And you are? I-- Lois Lane.
And still a bit feverish I'm afraid, aren't you, my dear? -l-- I guess.
-Excuse us, please.
What? Come on, honey.
I don't even know who that was.
He doesn't know me.
This is obviously one of a series of dreadful shocks for you, my dear.
But why? The Lois Lane of this dimension must've died before Clark came to Metropolis.
Then there's no Superman.
He didn't even know who that was.
-Oh, my.
-Well, it doesn't matter.
We don't belong here.
The only way we'll get back is with super-help.
-You have a plan? -But first I need an excuse to team up with Clark Kent.
And we're meeting my parents at 7 to go over the final guest list.
Okay.
Last thing, I saw that little stunt you pulled a few minutes ago.
-Stunt? -Don't give me those puppy eyes.
The gunfight out front, you ducked away and? Sweetheart, no one saw me.
I just, you know: -Burned his tires and the cops got him.
-Clark, you promised.
This is the slowest elevator.
They would lock you up in some lab and study you.
And even if you broke out you'd never have a life.
We'd never have a life.
No one will ever love you more than I do.
-I know.
-And no one understands you better.
So promise this is the last time.
-Here we are.
-Promise me.
-I'll see you at 7.
-Clark.
Lois you want your old job back, you got it.
That is, if it's okay with Mr.
Olsen.
If everything White says about you's true, Miss Lane, I'm lucky to have you.
Good.
Because I'd like to dive right into an expose on Tempus.
See.
Didn't I tell you? She's the best.
Since I've been a little out of touch with things I think I should work with a partner.
Partner? You? So, you wanna do an expose on Tempus.
Yes.
But first, we should talk about us.
Us? Well, actually, you.
For instance how many people know you're from another planet? -What? -That you can bend steel in your bare hands, leap buildings? Hey, hey, keep your voice down.
That you came here as a baby in a spaceship.
Lana said this was gonna happen.
That the Kents found you and raised you in Smallville.
-I didn't listen.
-From there -I'm sure things get a little different-- -Okay, just tell me one thing: Are you guys from the government? Certainly not, my boy.
No.
We're from another dimension.
I'm sorry.
I just-- I have a lot of trouble believing all this.
What? That Tempus is a criminal or that he's H.
G.
Wells, or that we're from a parallel Metropolis? No, that this other me flies around in tights.
-Well, your mother made them.
-My mom? Martha Kent.
But the Kents died when I was ten.
Oh, Clark, I'm sorry.
Who raised you? I kind of just bounced around.
It's okay.
It happened a long time ago.
I'm fine.
Are you? This is the weirdest feeling.
I know I shouldn't talk to you.
I know I should just walk away but.
What? I can't.
Eureka! It worked.
The tracking device, it's locked onto Tempus' transport.
Clark, help us get back where we belong.
Yes.
Help us rid your world of Tempus before he destroys it.
Clark? It's 7.
:03.
Seven.
Of course, your parents.
-We-- We were just-- -Working on a story.
-T ogether? -Well, yeah.
Perry-- Perry-- -Perry teamed us up.
-Did he? But-- But we can take point while you deal with your wedding.
I-- I know how overwhelming that can all be.
Just promise me we'll meet up later.
Let's go, Clark.
Clark? -I'll catch up to you later.
-Great.
I don't like having to come and look for you.
You know how Dad gets when you're late.
I'm not sure but I think I hate her.
Now we must cross this street here then round that corner over there.
You know, you really shouldn't walk around unarmed.
My stores are offering a great deal on a 1 2-clip automatic.
Twenty-four rounds with every purchase and a free pair of sunglasses.
Do what you will with me, Tempus.
But I implore you, spare the girl.
God, Herb, who writes your dialogue? -You sound like The Prisoner of Zenda.
-You're not gonna get away with this.
Get away with what? My becoming mayor of Metropolis by murdering Perry White? Because somebody might stop me? Big, brawny, looks good in blue? Gee, if only I lived in a dimension with no Superman.
Oh, wait.
I do.
You're going to another dimension yourself, Lois.
One slightly more spiritual.
Hope you've been good.
I've missed you, Herb.
Sure, you're a few years older, I'm a few pounds lighter.
You're about to be a corpse, I'm about to be a god but it's the same old us together again, huh? Where is Miss Lane? Juststanding around.
Oh, yes.
Do you think she has any idea she's 500 feet in the air? Stay calm.
Stay calm.
Okay.
I'm high up, I'm blind my hands are tied and the ledge is falling apart.
Okay, panic.
Watch that foot there, Lois.
That was a close one.
Oh, boy.
I wish I'd taken Lamaze.
Tempus, I cry out to whatever humanity is in you, stop this.
-Why? -Because it is barbaric and cruel.
Well, sure.
But it's fun.
-What do you have to gain by killing her? -Herb if I wanted to kill her I'd beat her to death with a frozen lamb chop and then eat it with a nice merlot.
Keep moving.
Gotta find a window.
No, I want to torture her send her into spasms of sheer terror.
-But why? -Because it's good TV.
It's fun for the whole family.
And then there are those magic words guaranteed to make it a ratings bonanza: "Help, Superman.
Save me.
" Only this time there's no Superman.
Only thing that would ruin this would be a commercial.
Now ask yourself, Herb, why is there no Superman here? Is it because this Clark lost his parents, didn't have their loving support? Or is it because he was denied the daily impetus of being in love with a woman who's always throwing herself into death's jaws and screaming for-- Help! Clark! Cloth napkins, not paper.
Right, Clark? -Clark! -Clark? I'll get-- I'll get back to you on that.
Clark! Bravo, Mr.
Kent.
My plan is working perfectly.
-You have a plan? -Yes, Herb.
I'm the bad guy.
We always have a plan.
You all right? Fine.
Thank you.
-Who did this? -Tempus.
-Let's call the police.
-Well, okay that's one way of handling it.
Well, what's the other? Look, I don't wanna be a hero.
Really? Then why did you go after that gunman this morning? Why did you save me? I help when I can -but I wanna live my life.
-Well that's why you need to have a secret identity.
A secret identity.
-ls that why you bought that ski suit? -Just go with me.
It's not a ski suit.
I mean, it is, but it's so much more than that.
It's a symbol.
You're making yourself into a beacon.
Are you always like this? I'm sorry, I'm a little high-strung.
Lady, you're a Stradivarius.
Well, maybe this'll help.
That's what I'm talking about.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Is this us? Well, it's me and him.
Are we? This is just too weird.
Oh, my.
They're alive? Does he spend much time with them? Yeah.
That's great.
-That's-- -They are really proud of him.
I'm sure your parents were too.
I guess so.
That was a long time ago.
-What happened? -A car wreck.
I saw it happen.
I was pretty fast, even then but not fast enough.
Lana said I shouldn't blame myself.
One man can't really make a difference no matter what kind of powers he has.
I know things are different here.
I know you're different.
But trust me, powers or no powers one man can change any world.
His mom made this for him, huh? Yeah.
Can you sew as well as she does? Well.
Look, Jimmy-- Sorry.
Mr.
Olsen I think it's a bad idea for Perry to debate Tempus tomorrow.
No, I certainly don't want him to look like a coward but Tempus said he was gonna kill him.
No, he didn't say when or where.
But if you know anybody in the Tempus camp who you might be able to get to, you know open up in exchange for, I don't know money, now would be a good time.
Yeah, I think security's a good idea too.
I'm working on that angle myself.
Bye.
I gotta get out of here.
How's it fit? -Tight.
-Well, let me see.
It needs a few pieces here or there.
I just remembered something from that picture you showed me.
It's in that trunk over there in a manila envelop.
My mom gave it to me when I was little.
She said it was on the blanket they found me in.
Always shows up just in the nick of time.
-I knew it, I look stupid.
-No.
No.
You look great.
The heroine creates her hero.
A mythically moving moment.
Herb, am I still a man in your eyes if I weep? This is what you want.
You want her to create Superman.
Very good, Herb.
Mind like that, you missed a big career in game shows.
Are you sure about this? I'm sure.
But you're not.
So let's get you comfortable.
How? Hey! Okay.
All right.
Just put it down.
Don't make me-- You know.
Go on.
Officer, maybe I can help.
Give me the gun.
Well, if everything's all right, I'll just be leaving.
Oh, wait.
Thanks? Superman.
Superman.
-"Super man"? -See, he thinks it's stupid.
That's a cool name.
Thanks, Superman.
Well, nobody's laughed so far.
And I don't see any men with nets.
So how does it feel? Well, it feels great.
My whole life I've never felt so good about being me.
Thank you.
Wait.
I can't.
You're right.
-That was crazy.
I'm-- I'm sorry.
-No, it's just that I've been-- This feeling that I keep having when I'm around you I can't control it.
It's fine.
We're fine.
I should straighten this line on your cape before we go out again.
Just because I'm not wearing my glasses you sure nobody's going to recognize me? -Positive.
-Clark? What are you doing? -Lana.
Hi.
-What is going on? Lois knows about me.
And, well, I've decided that I need.
No.
I've decided that the world needs me.
Needs you to what? Model men's underwear? Bring capes back in fashion? -All right, that's it.
-Lois.
Clark, you didn't.
I mean, you didn't go out there and: People didn't see you.
Of course people saw him, he's Superman.
I don't know how you talked him into this or what you're really after, but this is between him and me.
Clark, I want things the way they were, the way you promised.
Or else.
Hello.
It's for you, Lois.
-That's it.
-Lana.
Lana, come on.
-This is stupid.
-Hello? -Lana? -Who is this? I can't tell you, too dangerous.
But Perry White will die unless you get to the TV station on Carlin Avenue now.
Out.
I couldn't possibly look any better.
Major Domo.
What have you got for me? That bomb you asked for.
C7.
Enough firepower in that little sucker to level a building.
Excellent.
Not armed, Herb.
Just yet.
But I'd be careful just the same.
I'd hate to blow our friendship.
Whoever it was said there's gonna be a debate on TV in a few minutes.
And Perry is gonna be killed.
All right, Mr.
Tempus, let's just pull up the carpet and get down to brass tacks here.
Your whole campaign is based on the enemy.
"Prepare for the enemy, arm for the enemy.
" You're selling guns to 1 0-year-olds because of this enemy.
All right.
I wanna know, who is it? Up to this point I didn't have the sort of evidence I now possess.
But I can now state for the record that the enemy is very real.
The enemy is an invading force of aliens from outer space.
You' re nuttier than squirrel heaven.
Scoff if you will, Mr.
White, but the aliens are here.
-Perry, are you all right? -I'm fine.
My Lord, who is--? What? Everyone get back.
He's very dangerous.
Careful, Superman, it's a bomb.
-I see it.
-A bomb? Did he say a bomb? He's got a bomb.
The alien's got a bomb.
Everyone stand back.
I will save us.
No! All right.
You've got a lot of explaining to do, Mister Temp-- I think you're the one who owes this planet an explanation, invader.
You are part of an invading army, are you not? -No.
-You are here to conquer us? -Put those guns away.
-Stop it, you're killing him.
I'm holding the alien at bay with the only alloy known to weaken him.
You should feel fortunate I was prepared.
He can't hurt us now.
He's not part of any army and he's not here to hurt us.
That's why he flew in here, ripped open a door and threatened us with a bomb? -That's a lie.
-I'll tell you what's a lie.
This is the lie.
He's been amongst us for years hiding, learning waiting to strike.
That's right.
Clark Kent.
Mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I never meant for this to-- -Kent.
-Who would have thought? Abided and abetted by James Olsen, Perry White and Lois Lane.
All right, just hold on a minute here.
-You're twisting everything.
-The circus is over.
Alien or not, this man has rights.
I'm calling the police.
That's right.
Hide behind the law but you can't fool the people.
-They know.
They've seen the enemy -Tempus.
and they know that one man is ready to protect them.
-Yes.
-The explosive device.
-One man's ready to lay down his life -It's gonna go off.
to save a world.
And that man is me.
-It's ticking.
It's going to explode.
-What? -The bomb is going to explode.
-What? -It's ticking? It's gonna blow.
-Yes.
-I said that.
-Run! Out of my way.
Out of my way.
-You can't do this.
-Will you idiots move.
These are innocent people.
You cannot abandon them.
Watch me.
Clear out, you morons, or I'll blow you away.
I loathe this sort of behavior but you leave one little choice.
Oh, my God.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
No, Clark, you're too weak.
Clark? -ls he--? -He's not breathing.
-He saved us.
You see that? -That was amazing.
Clark, please.
Excuse me.
-ls everyone all right? -Yeah.
We're fine, thanks to you, Kent.
-Why didn't you tell us about yourself? -I know everyone has a lot of questions but the important thing is he's here to help.
He is in every way no less than a Superman.
-Superman.
-Kind of a nickname, Kent? -Well.
-I love it.
The suit's great.
Touch of the patriotic, stand alone a lot of muscles.
White, we gotta get you one of these.
Well, no, no, no.
No, sir.
I-- I think there's only one Superman.
That name.
I can see it right now on the front page of the Daily Planet.
I am proud to announce that the official returns are in.
And the winner by a 97 percent margin is Perry White.
Thank you.
Thank you.
All right.
All right.
As a great man once said: "It's not me you elected, but it's what I stand for.
" You all know who I am referring to my best friend and our former President.
And you all know him as The King.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Good to see you all.
Thank you.
I'm sorry the secret identity thing got blown.
It's all right.
Honestly, I don't know how you thought a pair of glasses would keep people from recognizing me.
It's kind of ridiculous.
Don't get me started.
Is Lana okay with this? Lana said that it was either her or Superman.
Oh, Clark, I'm sorry.
I wish I felt half as bad about losing her as I do about losing you.
What if I asked you to stay? -I can't.
-But I'm not sure how to be this.
You made it happen.
All I did was help you make the right choice.
You'll keep doing that.
You just have to believe in yourself as much as I do.
Lois, I don't just need your help.
I need you.
-So does he.
-What I'm trying to say.
-I know this sounds crazy but I think l-- -So does he.
Does he know what he has? We both do.
We all do.
Well, T empus is taken care of, and all is right again in both universes.
Except for you, my dear.
Are you ready? -Y es.
-Good.
We're in the alley across the street, this way.
I must say, my boy, I envy you.
Me? Why? With every eye upon you, every breath held in anticipation you hold in your hands a world waiting to be shaped.
I' m just not sure that I can-- You can take on such great responsibility? What did Shakespeare mean when he wrote: "ln apprehension how like a god"? It's not that gods are anxious about their responsibilities but with such great weight comes great understanding.
Trust that, Clark.
Trust that you've found your true destiny.
And that in you, a once-hopeless world has found its future.
Good luck to you.
And so it's with great pleasure I introduce another close friend, Clark Kent a.
k.
a.
Superman.
Now, Superman has a few things he'd like to tell us all about himself.
He's quite a man, the Clark Kent of this world.
I'd just like to talk about us for a second, our future.
I just wish he didn't have to be alone.
The hardest lesson is that love can be so fair to some and so cruel to others.
Even those who would be gods.
Nobody knows that better than this man.
Right? Clark? Superman? Son, now don't be shy.
Just step right up here.
Clark, you all right? Good luck, my dear.
-Lois? Are you all right? -I'm fine, I'm fine.
What happened? You were gone for almost 1 0 seconds.
Ten seconds? Yeah.
The weirdest 1 0 seconds of my life.
I didn't know where you were or what to do, and then.
-What? -I just-- I got this feeling.
Of what my life would be like if I lost you.
But I'm back and I'm not going anywhere ever again.
What happened? -It's a long story.
-Come on.
Easy.
You bone-headed backwards Cro-Magnons.
I won't forget this.
Any of you.
-You fools think you can hold me? -Watch your head.
-lsn't that--? Isn't he--? -Wanted for bank robbery.
In this dimension anyway.
-Clark, about Lana Lang.
-Yeah? Let's go ahead and invite her to the wedding.
I think I have a pretty good idea why it didn't work out between you two and why it'll always work with us no matter how crazy the world gets.
-I know.
Is this the absolute total final guest count? Funny you should mention that because I ran into an old friend last night.
-Who? -Lana Lang.
Oh, an old girlfriend.
-You're getting that sound in your voice.
-What sound? But any second, claws are gonna pop out of your fingers.
I'm gonna have to get you a saucer of milk.
Meow.
She's not worth it.
We dated in high school.
Oh, a Smallville girl here in the big city.
And? And I told her I was getting married.
Smart.
And she was? She was really happy for me.
So happy she'd like to come to the wedding? How did you know? -How did she take it? -What? When you said no.
-Clark? -Well, you have to know Lana.
No.
No, I don't, interestingly enough.
She's kind of insistent, sort of just steamrolls through things so I didn't say she could come -she sort of said she could come.
-Let me get this straight.
You're Superman.
And your high school girlfriend can push you around.
-Oh, God.
I-- -Help! Help! The bank's being robbed! -Speaking of Superman.
-Go.
We'll finish this at the office.
-Okay.
-Hey, be careful.
-What happened? -Some rocket came through the window.
Set off gas.
Hi, Lois.
Remember me? No, l-- How about now? It's a private joke.
Lois, after all we meant to each other, I'm still not ringing any bells? This guy comes in with big guns, starts shooting up the place.
-He took gold and jewels.
-Where did he go? I suppose time travel can be a real brain drain.
Care to drop your things and step into the sled here? Step on or be carried, makes no difference to me.
It's always something.
If I were you, I'd put that gun down and work on my manners.
Really.
Why? Lois? Lois! Lois! Miss Lane? My name is Wells, Herbert George Wells.
Actually, we've met but I doubt you'd remember.
You're the second person to say that to me.
What is going on, is this some kind of? Did you say Herbert George? H.
G.
Wells.
The writer who died a long time ago.
Oh, my God, I'm dead.
-No, no, no.
-What do you mean, "no"? I'm looking at my grave with a dead writer.
Miss Lane, I assure you, you are very much alive and so am l.
Let's sit.
Please.
Careful.
Now I'm going to tell you something.
And as I do, you will begin to remember, like a dream recalled.
Now close your eyes and let the images unspool.
We met on an extraordinary adventure.
Before I was this elderly gentleman you see before you I was a time traveler.
And I had journeyed into the future seeking utopia, but found instead T empus.
A violent psychotic with a bitter hatred for Superman.
He tried to kill Clark Kent as a baby hoping to change future history.
And you stopped him.
I remember.
You're H.
G.
Wells.
I know you.
But you're.
I don't wanna be rude, but you're a little-- Older.
Seventeen years.
The me you met was from 1 899.
The me you now see before you is from 1916.
-ls it okay if I get a headache? -That's quite all right.
After our escapade, Tempus escaped and built his own time machine.
He did something rather unique with it.
Here, let me show you.
-It's Metropolis.
-Look closer.
Is it not more dirty than clean, more dark than light? -ls this the future? -Oh, no.
Very much the present.
But an alternate present.
"President Heston"? Charlton Heston is President? What is this place? -A parallel dimension.
-What? A second Metropolis, a sibling reality coexisting with our own hidden from us by a curtain of space, now parted.
A thousand details alike, and a thousand as different as the infinite choices in a moment.
So in plain English Ben-Hur is President and I'm worm food.
I'm getting married next week.
Why does this happen to me? No.
But I told him that he wasn't gonna be there.
Do I wanna know why so many people are wearing guns or is that just gonna upset me more? Well, from what little I can gather, people are frightened, cynical have no faith society can protect them.
That, and a certain someone is making firearms affordable and attractive.
-And that's not the worst part.
-I know.
Who is this "enemy"? What is he after, why'd he put us here? Like you, I was kidnapped and dropped here without a clue as to why.
Well, if this place is the same but different maybe there's a Clark here.
-And if there's a Clark.
-There's a Superman.
How do you score this kind of swag? There's not a cop after you? Not a bank with your picture in it? Major Domo, can you keep a secret? -Sure.
-I have an inter-dimensional transport.
Right here in this building actually.
And every day I pop out of this universe into an alternate one take what I need, and then zip back here where I'm not wanted for so much as jaywalking.
Cretins.
Oh, Mr.
Tempus, you kill me, I swear.
If there's anybody funnier in this whole world.
It's no wonder you wanna be on the TV.
No, I don't wanna be on TV to entertain, Major Domo.
Anymore than I want people to know that I own this television station.
You see, TV is power.
The power to lull, to pacify.
And then when all eyes are glazed and all minds are jelly the power to take.
The power to hold the world in your fist.
Which is exactly what I intend to do when I'm elected mayor.
-Yes? -Wells and Lane have linked up.
Looking very buddy-buddy.
-Where are they going? -Looks like the Daily Planet.
No doubt in search of a superhero.
I love predictable behavior.
Clark's gotta be going out of his mind.
-Come on, hand it over.
-All right, here you go.
We have got to get back.
Our only hope is to get Tempus' machine.
To that end I have begun piecing something together out of odds and ends.
Now, it's not finished, but if I can get it to work it should home in on the flux capacitor of Tempus' dimensional transport assuming it has one.
Well, at least this world isn't completely nuts.
There may even be some hope.
More than hope.
Clark! Clark, over here, it's me! -Go get them, Ma! -Come back here! Get away! Well, things can't be all bad.
Come on.
If he's anything like my Clark, he'll be back inside making some lame excuse.
Who's been messing with my poster? That's not my tie.
That's not my coat.
And that hair, I look like a Malvolian Dan Rather.
All right, now.
Speak up.
-Who messed with my poster? -The closer we get to the bullpen the more familiar things get.
Who turned me into a pretty boy here? I did.
Mr.
Olsen.
The polls have showed you're skewing a little old.
So I had a talk with your campaign manager and we decided to run this new poster.
-I like it.
-Yes, sir.
But Mr.
Olsen-- -I don't believe this.
-I'm just an old Memphis word stringer and that ain't me.
It's a better you, all right? It's a younger you.
When you jumped into this race, you were way ahead and I wanna keep you there.
My paper has a lot on the line for you, White.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Lois! Is that you, honey? -It's me.
-I don't know how this could be.
I don't care.
I'm happier than a preacher in a month of Sundays.
Where have you been? Honey, what happened to your hair? -Oh, well, l-- -Miss Lane? James Olsen.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Mr.
Olsen is our new owner.
-Owner.
Really? -Y es.
A whiz kid of the computer world.
Decided to roll the dice on our rag.
White talks about you all the time.
He said you disappeared in the Congo? The Congo.
The gun-running story three years ago.
Right, I did.
-For a while, but-- -Lois.
I must've sent an army of people over there looking for you, honey.
-What happened? -What happened is.
I'm fine.
Obviously.
-Thanks to my friend here, Mr.
Wells.
-Hello.
Heruns a mission.
You were in a mission for three years? I was sick.
-Too sick to make a phone call? -Coma.
Absolutely incapacitated.
Just came out of it yesterday.
First thing she said to me was, "Herbie, get me to the Planet.
" -Naturally, I wondered what planet.
-Clark? -Then she explained to me-- -Oh, Clark, I am so glad to see you.
You and Superman.
Excuse me, miss.
But who are you and what's Superman? Clark, who's this? I have no idea.
Well, I guess she knows you.
So she ought to know me.
I'm Lana Lang, Mr.
Kent's fiancee.
And you are? I-- Lois Lane.
And still a bit feverish I'm afraid, aren't you, my dear? -l-- I guess.
-Excuse us, please.
What? Come on, honey.
I don't even know who that was.
He doesn't know me.
This is obviously one of a series of dreadful shocks for you, my dear.
But why? The Lois Lane of this dimension must've died before Clark came to Metropolis.
Then there's no Superman.
He didn't even know who that was.
-Oh, my.
-Well, it doesn't matter.
We don't belong here.
The only way we'll get back is with super-help.
-You have a plan? -But first I need an excuse to team up with Clark Kent.
And we're meeting my parents at 7 to go over the final guest list.
Okay.
Last thing, I saw that little stunt you pulled a few minutes ago.
-Stunt? -Don't give me those puppy eyes.
The gunfight out front, you ducked away and? Sweetheart, no one saw me.
I just, you know: -Burned his tires and the cops got him.
-Clark, you promised.
This is the slowest elevator.
They would lock you up in some lab and study you.
And even if you broke out you'd never have a life.
We'd never have a life.
No one will ever love you more than I do.
-I know.
-And no one understands you better.
So promise this is the last time.
-Here we are.
-Promise me.
-I'll see you at 7.
-Clark.
Lois you want your old job back, you got it.
That is, if it's okay with Mr.
Olsen.
If everything White says about you's true, Miss Lane, I'm lucky to have you.
Good.
Because I'd like to dive right into an expose on Tempus.
See.
Didn't I tell you? She's the best.
Since I've been a little out of touch with things I think I should work with a partner.
Partner? You? So, you wanna do an expose on Tempus.
Yes.
But first, we should talk about us.
Us? Well, actually, you.
For instance how many people know you're from another planet? -What? -That you can bend steel in your bare hands, leap buildings? Hey, hey, keep your voice down.
That you came here as a baby in a spaceship.
Lana said this was gonna happen.
That the Kents found you and raised you in Smallville.
-I didn't listen.
-From there -I'm sure things get a little different-- -Okay, just tell me one thing: Are you guys from the government? Certainly not, my boy.
No.
We're from another dimension.
I'm sorry.
I just-- I have a lot of trouble believing all this.
What? That Tempus is a criminal or that he's H.
G.
Wells, or that we're from a parallel Metropolis? No, that this other me flies around in tights.
-Well, your mother made them.
-My mom? Martha Kent.
But the Kents died when I was ten.
Oh, Clark, I'm sorry.
Who raised you? I kind of just bounced around.
It's okay.
It happened a long time ago.
I'm fine.
Are you? This is the weirdest feeling.
I know I shouldn't talk to you.
I know I should just walk away but.
What? I can't.
Eureka! It worked.
The tracking device, it's locked onto Tempus' transport.
Clark, help us get back where we belong.
Yes.
Help us rid your world of Tempus before he destroys it.
Clark? It's 7.
:03.
Seven.
Of course, your parents.
-We-- We were just-- -Working on a story.
-T ogether? -Well, yeah.
Perry-- Perry-- -Perry teamed us up.
-Did he? But-- But we can take point while you deal with your wedding.
I-- I know how overwhelming that can all be.
Just promise me we'll meet up later.
Let's go, Clark.
Clark? -I'll catch up to you later.
-Great.
I don't like having to come and look for you.
You know how Dad gets when you're late.
I'm not sure but I think I hate her.
Now we must cross this street here then round that corner over there.
You know, you really shouldn't walk around unarmed.
My stores are offering a great deal on a 1 2-clip automatic.
Twenty-four rounds with every purchase and a free pair of sunglasses.
Do what you will with me, Tempus.
But I implore you, spare the girl.
God, Herb, who writes your dialogue? -You sound like The Prisoner of Zenda.
-You're not gonna get away with this.
Get away with what? My becoming mayor of Metropolis by murdering Perry White? Because somebody might stop me? Big, brawny, looks good in blue? Gee, if only I lived in a dimension with no Superman.
Oh, wait.
I do.
You're going to another dimension yourself, Lois.
One slightly more spiritual.
Hope you've been good.
I've missed you, Herb.
Sure, you're a few years older, I'm a few pounds lighter.
You're about to be a corpse, I'm about to be a god but it's the same old us together again, huh? Where is Miss Lane? Juststanding around.
Oh, yes.
Do you think she has any idea she's 500 feet in the air? Stay calm.
Stay calm.
Okay.
I'm high up, I'm blind my hands are tied and the ledge is falling apart.
Okay, panic.
Watch that foot there, Lois.
That was a close one.
Oh, boy.
I wish I'd taken Lamaze.
Tempus, I cry out to whatever humanity is in you, stop this.
-Why? -Because it is barbaric and cruel.
Well, sure.
But it's fun.
-What do you have to gain by killing her? -Herb if I wanted to kill her I'd beat her to death with a frozen lamb chop and then eat it with a nice merlot.
Keep moving.
Gotta find a window.
No, I want to torture her send her into spasms of sheer terror.
-But why? -Because it's good TV.
It's fun for the whole family.
And then there are those magic words guaranteed to make it a ratings bonanza: "Help, Superman.
Save me.
" Only this time there's no Superman.
Only thing that would ruin this would be a commercial.
Now ask yourself, Herb, why is there no Superman here? Is it because this Clark lost his parents, didn't have their loving support? Or is it because he was denied the daily impetus of being in love with a woman who's always throwing herself into death's jaws and screaming for-- Help! Clark! Cloth napkins, not paper.
Right, Clark? -Clark! -Clark? I'll get-- I'll get back to you on that.
Clark! Bravo, Mr.
Kent.
My plan is working perfectly.
-You have a plan? -Yes, Herb.
I'm the bad guy.
We always have a plan.
You all right? Fine.
Thank you.
-Who did this? -Tempus.
-Let's call the police.
-Well, okay that's one way of handling it.
Well, what's the other? Look, I don't wanna be a hero.
Really? Then why did you go after that gunman this morning? Why did you save me? I help when I can -but I wanna live my life.
-Well that's why you need to have a secret identity.
A secret identity.
-ls that why you bought that ski suit? -Just go with me.
It's not a ski suit.
I mean, it is, but it's so much more than that.
It's a symbol.
You're making yourself into a beacon.
Are you always like this? I'm sorry, I'm a little high-strung.
Lady, you're a Stradivarius.
Well, maybe this'll help.
That's what I'm talking about.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Is this us? Well, it's me and him.
Are we? This is just too weird.
Oh, my.
They're alive? Does he spend much time with them? Yeah.
That's great.
-That's-- -They are really proud of him.
I'm sure your parents were too.
I guess so.
That was a long time ago.
-What happened? -A car wreck.
I saw it happen.
I was pretty fast, even then but not fast enough.
Lana said I shouldn't blame myself.
One man can't really make a difference no matter what kind of powers he has.
I know things are different here.
I know you're different.
But trust me, powers or no powers one man can change any world.
His mom made this for him, huh? Yeah.
Can you sew as well as she does? Well.
Look, Jimmy-- Sorry.
Mr.
Olsen I think it's a bad idea for Perry to debate Tempus tomorrow.
No, I certainly don't want him to look like a coward but Tempus said he was gonna kill him.
No, he didn't say when or where.
But if you know anybody in the Tempus camp who you might be able to get to, you know open up in exchange for, I don't know money, now would be a good time.
Yeah, I think security's a good idea too.
I'm working on that angle myself.
Bye.
I gotta get out of here.
How's it fit? -Tight.
-Well, let me see.
It needs a few pieces here or there.
I just remembered something from that picture you showed me.
It's in that trunk over there in a manila envelop.
My mom gave it to me when I was little.
She said it was on the blanket they found me in.
Always shows up just in the nick of time.
-I knew it, I look stupid.
-No.
No.
You look great.
The heroine creates her hero.
A mythically moving moment.
Herb, am I still a man in your eyes if I weep? This is what you want.
You want her to create Superman.
Very good, Herb.
Mind like that, you missed a big career in game shows.
Are you sure about this? I'm sure.
But you're not.
So let's get you comfortable.
How? Hey! Okay.
All right.
Just put it down.
Don't make me-- You know.
Go on.
Officer, maybe I can help.
Give me the gun.
Well, if everything's all right, I'll just be leaving.
Oh, wait.
Thanks? Superman.
Superman.
-"Super man"? -See, he thinks it's stupid.
That's a cool name.
Thanks, Superman.
Well, nobody's laughed so far.
And I don't see any men with nets.
So how does it feel? Well, it feels great.
My whole life I've never felt so good about being me.
Thank you.
Wait.
I can't.
You're right.
-That was crazy.
I'm-- I'm sorry.
-No, it's just that I've been-- This feeling that I keep having when I'm around you I can't control it.
It's fine.
We're fine.
I should straighten this line on your cape before we go out again.
Just because I'm not wearing my glasses you sure nobody's going to recognize me? -Positive.
-Clark? What are you doing? -Lana.
Hi.
-What is going on? Lois knows about me.
And, well, I've decided that I need.
No.
I've decided that the world needs me.
Needs you to what? Model men's underwear? Bring capes back in fashion? -All right, that's it.
-Lois.
Clark, you didn't.
I mean, you didn't go out there and: People didn't see you.
Of course people saw him, he's Superman.
I don't know how you talked him into this or what you're really after, but this is between him and me.
Clark, I want things the way they were, the way you promised.
Or else.
Hello.
It's for you, Lois.
-That's it.
-Lana.
Lana, come on.
-This is stupid.
-Hello? -Lana? -Who is this? I can't tell you, too dangerous.
But Perry White will die unless you get to the TV station on Carlin Avenue now.
Out.
I couldn't possibly look any better.
Major Domo.
What have you got for me? That bomb you asked for.
C7.
Enough firepower in that little sucker to level a building.
Excellent.
Not armed, Herb.
Just yet.
But I'd be careful just the same.
I'd hate to blow our friendship.
Whoever it was said there's gonna be a debate on TV in a few minutes.
And Perry is gonna be killed.
All right, Mr.
Tempus, let's just pull up the carpet and get down to brass tacks here.
Your whole campaign is based on the enemy.
"Prepare for the enemy, arm for the enemy.
" You're selling guns to 1 0-year-olds because of this enemy.
All right.
I wanna know, who is it? Up to this point I didn't have the sort of evidence I now possess.
But I can now state for the record that the enemy is very real.
The enemy is an invading force of aliens from outer space.
You' re nuttier than squirrel heaven.
Scoff if you will, Mr.
White, but the aliens are here.
-Perry, are you all right? -I'm fine.
My Lord, who is--? What? Everyone get back.
He's very dangerous.
Careful, Superman, it's a bomb.
-I see it.
-A bomb? Did he say a bomb? He's got a bomb.
The alien's got a bomb.
Everyone stand back.
I will save us.
No! All right.
You've got a lot of explaining to do, Mister Temp-- I think you're the one who owes this planet an explanation, invader.
You are part of an invading army, are you not? -No.
-You are here to conquer us? -Put those guns away.
-Stop it, you're killing him.
I'm holding the alien at bay with the only alloy known to weaken him.
You should feel fortunate I was prepared.
He can't hurt us now.
He's not part of any army and he's not here to hurt us.
That's why he flew in here, ripped open a door and threatened us with a bomb? -That's a lie.
-I'll tell you what's a lie.
This is the lie.
He's been amongst us for years hiding, learning waiting to strike.
That's right.
Clark Kent.
Mild-mannered reporter for a great metropolitan newspaper.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, I never meant for this to-- -Kent.
-Who would have thought? Abided and abetted by James Olsen, Perry White and Lois Lane.
All right, just hold on a minute here.
-You're twisting everything.
-The circus is over.
Alien or not, this man has rights.
I'm calling the police.
That's right.
Hide behind the law but you can't fool the people.
-They know.
They've seen the enemy -Tempus.
and they know that one man is ready to protect them.
-Yes.
-The explosive device.
-One man's ready to lay down his life -It's gonna go off.
to save a world.
And that man is me.
-It's ticking.
It's going to explode.
-What? -The bomb is going to explode.
-What? -It's ticking? It's gonna blow.
-Yes.
-I said that.
-Run! Out of my way.
Out of my way.
-You can't do this.
-Will you idiots move.
These are innocent people.
You cannot abandon them.
Watch me.
Clear out, you morons, or I'll blow you away.
I loathe this sort of behavior but you leave one little choice.
Oh, my God.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
No, Clark, you're too weak.
Clark? -ls he--? -He's not breathing.
-He saved us.
You see that? -That was amazing.
Clark, please.
Excuse me.
-ls everyone all right? -Yeah.
We're fine, thanks to you, Kent.
-Why didn't you tell us about yourself? -I know everyone has a lot of questions but the important thing is he's here to help.
He is in every way no less than a Superman.
-Superman.
-Kind of a nickname, Kent? -Well.
-I love it.
The suit's great.
Touch of the patriotic, stand alone a lot of muscles.
White, we gotta get you one of these.
Well, no, no, no.
No, sir.
I-- I think there's only one Superman.
That name.
I can see it right now on the front page of the Daily Planet.
I am proud to announce that the official returns are in.
And the winner by a 97 percent margin is Perry White.
Thank you.
Thank you.
All right.
All right.
As a great man once said: "It's not me you elected, but it's what I stand for.
" You all know who I am referring to my best friend and our former President.
And you all know him as The King.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Good to see you all.
Thank you.
I'm sorry the secret identity thing got blown.
It's all right.
Honestly, I don't know how you thought a pair of glasses would keep people from recognizing me.
It's kind of ridiculous.
Don't get me started.
Is Lana okay with this? Lana said that it was either her or Superman.
Oh, Clark, I'm sorry.
I wish I felt half as bad about losing her as I do about losing you.
What if I asked you to stay? -I can't.
-But I'm not sure how to be this.
You made it happen.
All I did was help you make the right choice.
You'll keep doing that.
You just have to believe in yourself as much as I do.
Lois, I don't just need your help.
I need you.
-So does he.
-What I'm trying to say.
-I know this sounds crazy but I think l-- -So does he.
Does he know what he has? We both do.
We all do.
Well, T empus is taken care of, and all is right again in both universes.
Except for you, my dear.
Are you ready? -Y es.
-Good.
We're in the alley across the street, this way.
I must say, my boy, I envy you.
Me? Why? With every eye upon you, every breath held in anticipation you hold in your hands a world waiting to be shaped.
I' m just not sure that I can-- You can take on such great responsibility? What did Shakespeare mean when he wrote: "ln apprehension how like a god"? It's not that gods are anxious about their responsibilities but with such great weight comes great understanding.
Trust that, Clark.
Trust that you've found your true destiny.
And that in you, a once-hopeless world has found its future.
Good luck to you.
And so it's with great pleasure I introduce another close friend, Clark Kent a.
k.
a.
Superman.
Now, Superman has a few things he'd like to tell us all about himself.
He's quite a man, the Clark Kent of this world.
I'd just like to talk about us for a second, our future.
I just wish he didn't have to be alone.
The hardest lesson is that love can be so fair to some and so cruel to others.
Even those who would be gods.
Nobody knows that better than this man.
Right? Clark? Superman? Son, now don't be shy.
Just step right up here.
Clark, you all right? Good luck, my dear.
-Lois? Are you all right? -I'm fine, I'm fine.
What happened? You were gone for almost 1 0 seconds.
Ten seconds? Yeah.
The weirdest 1 0 seconds of my life.
I didn't know where you were or what to do, and then.
-What? -I just-- I got this feeling.
Of what my life would be like if I lost you.
But I'm back and I'm not going anywhere ever again.
What happened? -It's a long story.
-Come on.
Easy.
You bone-headed backwards Cro-Magnons.
I won't forget this.
Any of you.
-You fools think you can hold me? -Watch your head.
-lsn't that--? Isn't he--? -Wanted for bank robbery.
In this dimension anyway.
-Clark, about Lana Lang.
-Yeah? Let's go ahead and invite her to the wedding.
I think I have a pretty good idea why it didn't work out between you two and why it'll always work with us no matter how crazy the world gets.