Felicity s03e15 Episode Script
Senioritis
Previously on Felicity I'm DeForrest, by the way DeForrest Ingram.
- Hi.
- Hey, you got your eyes back.
- Wow.
They're nice.
- You're the beautiful voice.
I think Ben and I just broke up.
Nothing happened.
Being up there made me realize that I didn't want to be up there.
It made me realize I wanted to be here with you.
Are you sure? Mr.
Fitzgerald, I so appreciate the fact that you're trying to support the Pacific Northwest's cultural community.
I mean, I've never been there, but I think that innovation, diversity, and access to the arts is a great thing.
Mr.
Crane, give me a situation in which you failed - and how you handled that.
- What? Give me a situation in which you failed and how you handled that.
- He's not going to ask those questions.
- What are you Do you want my help or not? I went to Harvard Business School.
Summer program.
I know what I'm talking about.
- What are those things on your face? - Pore suckers.
I have this huge event coming up.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Owww! - You all right? Oh, my God.
- Is Ben here? - Uh, no.
No, he's not.
Do you want to come in? OK.
Has he gotten any of my messages? Yeah, I've told him you called.
But you know Ben.
No, I don't.
Maybe that's part of the problem.
What do you mean? Well, I assumed he was I don't know.
Nothing.
Yeah, I know he can be pretty irresponsible sometimes.
I'm just confused.
I asked him to go to Southampton, we went together, we had a really good time.
Something happened? Yeah.
* Can you become * * Can you become * * A new version of you * * New wallpaper * * New shoe leather * * A new way home * * Dont remember * * New Version of you * * I need a new version of me * * New version of you * * I need a new version of me * - Hey.
What are you doing? - I'm studying.
- You're what? - I'm studying.
Really? I thought I could do pretty well on finals this year, so I thought I'd just approach the whole thing a little differently.
- That's great.
- Yeah.
Uh, hey.
The the episode, uh, 18, Georgia files.
- Did you erase them? - Uh, no.
They're on your computer.
- You sure you didn't erase them? - No, I didn't erase them.
- I'll be out in just a second.
- Thanks, and hurry.
Yeah.
She said she'd be there in a second.
That guy's driving me nuts.
- Noel? - Yes, Noel.
Sorry.
I'm a little anxious.
The foundation called back.
I have my second interview today.
Oh, my God, Noel! That is great! Yeah.
Yeah.
I've been terrified for days.
You know, I mean, this is this is real.
No matter what I've done, there's always been the safety net that was just college.
You know? But, yeah, this is real.
This is like that first job.
- You're going to be great.
- Yeah.
I hope so.
You could've just said, "Hey, can I have the paper?" - He's annoying the hell out of me.
- There it is.
Georgia files.
I saved it under "Geo.
" What are you doing? "What am I doing?" I'm making breakfast.
First of all, who puts peanut butter on a bagel? - You ever tried it? - Secondly, did you notice anything interesting about that bagel? It was toasted, it was on a plate, someone had prepared it? - Toast another one! - There are no other ones.
- Have the bagel! - I don't want a bagel with peanut butter.
- Noel, what's your problem? - You're my problem.
You don't think.
I don't know what's going on with you guys, but it's annoying.
Look.
No bagel.
Learning requires an open mind! OK, so now I'm supposed to tell you what I think that means? You know what? Can you just hold on a second? It's Reading Week, people, and some of us are trying to read! - Wow.
Thanks! - No problem.
So, where were we? - Um, learning requires an open mind.
- Oh, right.
That was funny.
Hello! We're in here, trying not to fail our MCATs.
And they're tomorrow.
Oh.
OK, well, I'll be really quiet.
I'll be as quiet as a mouse.
You won't even know I'm here.
Sorry.
Is your place any quieter than this? Actually, I've got a hotel room for tonight.
Everybody does that before the MCATs.
- They do? - Yeah.
It's a quiet place to study and you can get a good night's sleep.
Why didn't I think of that? It's no problem.
You can stay with me if you want.
- It's already booked.
- Uh, um, no.
I'll be fine.
OK, I'll pay half! What the hell happened to your face? Don't worry about it.
I got a surprise for you.
Ready? - I'm gonna have a bar mitzvah! - What? - It's the Jewish rite of passage.
- I know what a bar mitzvah is.
But didn't you have one when you were a kid? No.
That's the thing.
My parents never really believed in religion when I was growing up, so I didn't have one, but I can have one now, so I'm gonna do it.
- What do you think? - That's my surprise? Yeah.
Isn't it great? I have not been shooting the Shabbat with Rabbi Levin for two months.
I've been working at this.
My Torah portion, the whole thing.
So we'll have a ceremony and then we'll have a little party afterwards.
And then, you know, under Jewish custom, I'll officially be a man.
Finally.
That's funny.
I'm talking about my Jewish heritage and you're making jokes, which is fine, but just don't do that tonight.
- Tonight? - Rabbi Levin's coming for dinner.
- I'm thinking about ordering in Chinese.
- Why don't you let me cook dinner? - You'd do that for me? Yeah.
- I know how much this means to you.
- Ohh! You are the greatest.
- And, Sean? - Yeah.
For future reference, just, um, when you say you have a surprise for me, have a surprise for me.
Yeah.
That's OK.
The Wing Luke Asian Museum? Oh, uh, a museum in Seattle exploring the issues relating to art, history and culture of Asian Pacific Americans.
- Named after? - Wing Luke, Seattle city councilman, 1962.
- Hey, guys.
- Richard, what are you doing? Just trying to protect the school and my reputation.
- What are you talking about? - It's the end of the year.
You know what that means.
Senioritis.
All the kids are getting crazy ideas.
It's time to steal the mascot, put bubble bath in the fountain, T.
P.
The library.
Well, not on my watch.
- Nice uniform.
- I borrowed it from security.
I think it sends a strong message.
- It definitely does.
- I want people to know I'm out there.
I could be studying for my own finals, but I'm sacrificing that time to make sure our campus is prank-free.
We got a problem in sector four.
- Yeah, check that.
Be right there.
- I need backup.
If you guys could let me know of any suspicious activity.
- We'll we'll call you.
- Yeah.
Thanks.
Good to see you.
Noel? What's going on with you and Ben? - You guys have been acting so weird around each other.
- No, it's nothing.
You're lying, and I know you're lying.
I'm not.
I just don't want to talk about Ben.
- Why are you mad at him? - Can we just drop this? Is it something that I should know? I have to go.
I have an interview to get to, and you have a final.
I do, but I know you're trying to change the subject.
It's working, isn't it? - Good luck.
You're gonna do great.
- You too.
Good luck.
All right.
You have reached Blumberg Productions.
For Sean.
Press one.
For not Sean.
Press two.
Ben.
It's Samantha.
Avery's roommate.
Something's happened to Avery.
She's in trouble.
If you get this message.
Can you call me on my cell phone? 382 Hello? Hey.
Yeah.
What happened? Are you serious? - Hey.
- I wouldn't have called, but Avery insisted.
What happened? You said that they pumped her stomach? I think if you had returned her phone calls, she probably wouldn't be here.
- OK, what did she do? - Talk to her.
Avery.
Hey.
Hey.
Life is the greatest! Can you believe this? - Today was a good day.
- Oh, today was a great day.
It means that anything is possible, that the world is just one big, giant opportunity! Noel, I'm so happy for you.
- I'm happy for you.
- Mine was just a final! There's no such thing as "just a final," you know? It's still an obstacle.
I mean, whether it's a final or an interview, it's still something that we have to surmount.
- Is "surmount" a word? - Yeah, I think it is.
We gotta do something to celebrate.
Just something crazy.
- What do you want to do? - I don't know! We just gotta do something to cement this moment, so we won't forget that it ever happened! We should T.
P.
The library.
That would make Richard crazy! - No, I'm kidding.
- I know, but you're a genius.
We can't T.
P.
The library! - Why not? - Because that's stupid! And because I got caught breaking into the pool and - I got in big trouble.
If I get caught - No, no, no.
I've been here for four years, for 48 months of my life.
If I don't do something, just one thing that's stupid and idiotic before I leave, then We gotta do it.
OK? The time is now.
While we still can.
- I can't believe this! - Come on! I got the job.
I'm I'm moving to Seattle.
You're moving to Seattle.
Yeah.
I guess I am.
Don't you think when people do pranks, they think it's more funny than stupid? But I just think this is stupid.
Well, this part is stupid.
Sitting here with a bunch of toilet paper waiting for the library to close, that's stupid.
But the actual throwing of the paper, that's going to be fun.
OK? I promise you.
Get into the spirit.
It's gonna be fun.
- I'm in the spirit.
I'm here.
- I know.
I know you already told me, but what is this job in Seattle, exactly? Oh.
Easy.
Um Quentin Fitzgerald, that computer billionaire in Seattle? - Uh, no.
- You don't know who he is? - No.
- He's starting this foundation for the arts.
They're looking for graphic designers to head up different sections of the Web site, and I'm gonna be in charge of managing the whole thing.
So, like, I'm going to have people working for me.
Like artists from all around the world, you know? It's like going to grad school and getting paid for it.
Noel, I'm gonna miss you.
- What? - You could work for me.
I have to hire a coordinator to work with all these artists.
It would be a dream job.
Would you consider something like that? Oh, my God! It was all a mistake.
They did some blood tests and a mental status exam and they wanted to keep me overnight, but I told them I'm fine.
They said I could go home.
Avery? Tell me what happened.
After the shooting, I was prescribed these pills because I was having nightmares and the doctor said that it would help with the anxiety.
But, you know, I was doing a lot better.
And then, last night, I- I just I didn't feel like myself.
I just felt lost and confused.
So I took two.
But they didn't do anything.
So l I took two more.
I don't know how many I took.
Were you Were you trying to kill yourself? No.
* Look-a-look around and you'll find * * I've wasted my time * * I don't know * * If I've found the right door * * Turn, turn around and you'll see * * What has happened to me * * I dont know where Im going half the time * * He don't want me around * * We gotta meet back down on the ground * * He don't want me around * * We gotta meet back down on the ground * * Look, look around and you ask * * Can she make it that fast * * I don't know if I found the right road * * Come.
Come around.
Stop right there * * you might breathe free the air * * I dont know where Im doing half the time * Ooh.
The ham's almost ready.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
We can't have ham.
- Sean.
I'm kidding.
- It's chicken.
Relax.
- It is chicken.
- I'll get it.
You keep tossing.
- All right.
You must be Megan.
It is so great to meet you.
I'm Marissa Levin.
- The rabbi.
- You're the rabbi.
Can I? - Oh, yes, please.
- Thank you.
This is, um, Sean Your your Marissa is here.
Hey! I'm so glad you could make it.
- Good to see you.
- It's good to see you.
- So glad you could make it.
Oh, thank you! - It smells great.
- Yeah, that's Megan.
- Yeah.
She's talking about the food.
Can I talk to you in the kitchen? Yeah.
Why don't you find a seat, I'll get something to drink.
- Isn't she great? - Oh, she's fantastic.
- Don't you think you could've told me? - Told you what? - That Rabbi Levin looks like a Hooters girl! - Come on.
Now I know why you were so anxious to study! She's a Talmudic scholar.
Who looks like she could give a lap dance! Which is convenient.
OK.
Um, would you just give her a chance? We'll have dinner and you'll see that she's amazing.
She's here to help me with my bar mitzvah, Megan.
She's a rabbi.
- Does she have proof? Like an I.
D.
or something? - Stop it.
OK, um, how did I do? So far we both rocked it.
- Really? - Yeah.
I got a 31 on the Bio, - and you got a 32.
- Yes! Oh, my God.
Do you realize that in less than - How great is that? - You know where we should go after this? Where? - Coney Island.
- I'm a fiend for roller coasters! This is embarrassing.
I- I think I should go.
- DeForrest, this is your room.
- Yeah.
I know, but, uh, it's not a problem.
Just keep the room and and, uh, do good on your test tomorrow.
Break a femur.
Literally, this whole place was filled with Christmas trees.
- Really? - Yeah.
I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I always wanted a Christmas tree growing up.
- Are you kidding me? So did I! - Really? - Yeah, really! - We had one.
A Christmas tree.
Not being Jewish.
Oh, I was so jealous of people like you.
It looked like so much fun the tree, the presents, the fake snow.
- Oh, yeah.
- It was great.
- Yeah.
- You know one thing we did have, though? - Brisket.
- True, true.
My mother's brisket is amazing.
Nobody made better brisket than my Gaboom.
It's my grandma.
Uh It was like a whole day process, too.
She'd go to the kosher butcher and pick out the right meat and everything.
And she'd sing.
She was so happy to be cooking.
She'd sing like - That's so funny.
- I know.
- Isn't it just beef? - What? - Brisket.
Y- yeah.
It-lt's beef.
You know what? I actually have to admit it.
I'm a little nervous about the bar mitzvah.
A little bit.
I think it's so great that you're doing this.
I am so proud of you.
It could be fun.
- It's gonna - Where you going? - Home! - Why? Oh, I really should be studying for finals.
And anyway, I don't want to break up any more of your intimate conversation.
So long! Thanks for stopping here with me.
I really just needed something to calm my nerves.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Thank you.
It's OK.
Thanks.
Since I've been back this last month, everything seems so screwed up.
All the things that I thought were important and valuable, all of sudden, they're not.
Yeah.
And my friends.
I don't want to say that they're shallow because that sounds mean, but Well, what about Samantha? She seems to care about you.
Yeah, I guess.
Maybe you should go talk to somebody, professionally.
What you went through is pretty traumatic.
That might help.
No, I did that already.
It didn't help.
OK.
I'm just lonely.
Were you serious about what you said before? - What? - About that job.
Yeah, I was serious! Ben and I haven't really talked about what we're gonna do this summer.
Just remember you'd have the best boss of all time.
- So it's something I can really think about? - Definitely think about it.
Yeah, I mean - Where've you been? - I was T.
P.
ing the library.
Noel got this really great job offer at this start-up webzine in Seattle, so we were celebrating.
- So you T.
P.
'd the library? - Yeah.
Actually, he thinks there might be a job for me there this summer.
Really? We haven't even talked about what we're gonna do over the summer yet.
It's not like I took the job.
I just, you know.
What? What's the matter? The thing is, on the way home from the library, I saw you with Avery.
I mean, I'm sure there's a rational explanation for it.
You should know, though, that it felt awful seeing you with her.
Well, I'm sure it did.
I'm sorry, but there is an explanation.
It just seems like there's always an explanation.
I was on my way out and her roommate called to tell me Avery was in the hospital.
She almost O.
D.
'd on these pills.
But she's OK? I mean, she's fine now but we didn't know for a while if she was going to be OK.
And then her roommate had to leave, so I had to take Avery home.
I'm sorry.
I know how this must make you feel.
I really am sorry.
The thing is, I feel bad for her.
It's just It's weird that she keeps showing up all the time.
It's awkward.
I know, and I think that's over.
I think she's done with that.
- OK? - OK.
If you want to sleep, I can go work in the living room.
No, I like having you here.
OK.
Hey.
Are we, um I mean, was there a real problem last night? 'Cause I haven't heard from you.
Nope.
No problem.
I just had work to do.
Look.
I know you may not totally understand the whole bar mitzvah thing No, no.
I understand, Sean.
I understand completely.
And actually, I thought about it a lot last night, and, uh, Rabbi Levin, she really opened my eyes.
She did? Oh, that's great.
I knew you'd come around.
So, listen to this.
I'm thinking about having a theme for the party, for the bar mitzvah.
I know that sounds lame, but if I was 13 there'd be no question.
I think you should be with Rabbi Levin.
Be with? What? Like in the biblical sense? - You're kidding.
Megan, she's my rabbi.
- So? I saw the way you were together last night, and it hit me.
You and I are just kidding ourselves.
We don't belong together.
I'm not Jewish, you're not Wiccan.
It's never gonna work.
- OK, we've been through this before.
- Yes, but the fact is, you and that rabbi, man, you're like meant for each other.
You have the same beliefs, the same interests.
You sing the same songs that have one-word lyrics.
Maybe she's not the girl you should be with specifically, but that's the kind of girl you should be with.
Because I can't do this anymore.
Pranksters! I have ways of exposing you, do you hear me? You're not going to get away with this! Hey! Where were you last night? - Avery almost O.
D.
'd? - Yeah.
Now I know that Ben had a reason to be with her.
Oh.
And that reason would be? She was hospitalized! Right.
- What? You're doing that thing again.
- What thing? Like you're going to tell me something, and then you don't.
No! I'm not doing No.
I'm thinking about the library.
I feel guilty about what we did, and Richard's gonna freak.
Richard's not gonna.
He can't do anything.
Besides, you already have a job.
- Did you tell Ben about Seattle? - Yes.
I mean, I mentioned it.
We didn't really talk about it.
We kind of got distracted with the whole Avery thing.
There's that look again.
Ben was just helping her.
I'm sure the whole Ben and Avery thing was completely innocent.
End of story.
Hey.
Hey! So, um, how did you do? Oh, you know, there's always Johns Hopkins University.
No MCAT test score required for admission.
Come on, you know you did fine.
Yeah, maybe.
I could always be a garbage man.
I heard that wasn't so bad.
But, no, listen.
Seriously, I wanted to, uh, say I'm sorry - Don't be.
- Last night was just You saved my life on this.
You know that, right? That means you gotta hire me when you open your practice.
I make a mean receptionist.
- Dr.
Elena Tyler's office.
Could you hold? - Stop it! - I'll see you.
- OK.
- Hey.
What is this? - Not right now, - I'm going to see my spiritual advisor.
- Yeah, but do you know what this is? Uh, yeah.
Noel made these while you were gallivanting around Southampton.
- He was trying to cheer Felicity up.
- I was not gallivanting.
It's got, like, dinner and movies and rollerblading.
What is that? It's a whole arts-and-crafts thing The back says "Breakup Kit" on it.
What's that about? Hey.
Avery.
How you doing? I'm sorry to bother you.
I wanted to give you these flowers and say thank you.
- Well, you don't have to thank me.
- I know.
I hate to run, but I gotta see a rabbi about a thing.
- Can I ask you a favor? - Yeah.
Can I crash here for a little while and study? I have so much work to do, and I don't feel like being alone.
Just for a little while.
Uh, yeah, I guess.
Yeah.
Look, I just gotta tell you that this this is making Felicity really uncomfortable.
I'll give you guys some privacy.
I'll be right back.
Hey.
What the hell did that mean? You guys might want to be alone to fool around some more.
What are you talking about? We've never fooled around.
You think I like being responsible for her? - You're so transparent.
- I'm "transparent"! What does that mean? Another damsel in distress saved by Ben.
Do you only save beautiful women? You'd love if Avery got between me and Felicity! - I think she already has.
- The only person getting between me and Felicity is you.
No, I'm offering her an amazing opportunity.
Like that's why you're inviting her! You know this would be great for her.
She might not go Because she wants to spend the summer with her boyfriend? Yeah, with a guy who lies to her.
You're a jealous little dick! - You think I'm jealous of you? - Yeah, yeah, I do! I'm not jealous of a guy who sleeps with Avery, then tells Felicity that nothing happened! - What is he talking about? - I have no idea! Nothing happened.
You said that something happened.
All right.
She kissed me.
One kiss.
Good luck.
See ya.
You said nothing happened.
- Yeah.
Nothing did happen.
- You kissed her in Southampton! No, I didn't kiss her.
She kissed me.
It meant nothing.
- So why didn't you tell me? - Because it was a stupid kiss! I told you.
I went up there confused.
I needed to figure things out, which I did.
- I want to be with you.
I don't want to be with her.
- What was she doing here? - She just showed up.
What was I supposed to do? - Say no? There has to be a reason you can't say no to her.
- Is there a reason Noel's giving you a breakup kit? - What? These stupid coupons He's in love with you.
We're talking about Avery.
I don't want her around you! - Well, I don't want you spending the summer with Noel.
- What? What do you mean, "what"? I don't! Ben, those are two completely different situations! I would be going there for a job! Avery's this girl who clearly has deep feelings for you - Like Noel has for you! - No, it's not the same thing! Noel has feelings! He's one of my closest friends! That doesn't mean he's not trying to break us up! I don't know what else to say.
- Well, what are you gonna do? - I don't know.
Oh, no.
Did it go that badly? Everything is fine.
So why are you vigorously scrubbing out our refrigerator? - Because I'm a bigot.
- What? Before I knew what DeForrest looked like, I liked him.
I mean, we have the best time together.
He's funny, and smart, and sweet.
The only reason we're not dating is the way he looks.
I'm sure that DeForrest is like, a totally cool person, but you can't help it if there isn't any chemistry between you.
Where are you going? To a learning situation which requires an open mind.
Is that Mother of God.
Noel Crane! How could you stab me in the back like that? Ugh.
Keep eating.
I'm getting my stuff.
Going back to my apartment.
- No.
No you're not.
- Excuse me? Excuse me, OK? I went and I saw the rabbi today.
Oh.
Let me guess.
You're engaged.
Not funny.
She actually has some pretty good thoughts.
- Did you say thoughts, or thongs? - Have a little respect! She's a woman of God.
She thinks that it might be good for us to go to therapy.
Oh, my God.
Are you kidding? Couples therapy is crap.
You're a psychology major.
You're supposed to believe in that crap! I don't.
We don't need it.
- We don't? - No! What couples break up and get back together every single week? What Goths do you know that date practicing Jews? We have plenty of issues to discuss! Yes, that is my point.
We're too different.
No! The point is we're great together.
This is the best relationship that I have ever had! - We'll go to couples counseling.
- Fine! - Good! - Good! Hi.
Hey.
What's up? I was just thinking about, you know, the other night.
You know, and how great you were.
And how smart and funny you are, and Are you dumping me? Because I didn't know we were dating.
- You didn't have to do that.
- I wanted to.
You wanted to, or you thought you should? - That was not a pity kiss.
- I didn't use the word "pity.
" I was thinking it, I just didn't use it.
I don't want that kind of favor.
I don't need to be part of anyone's experiment to see what it's like to be romantic with a guy they would be attracted to if he wasn't so huge.
I think you just called me shallow.
I didn't use that word, either.
But it's not your fault.
You know? You were just being kind.
But no, thanks.
I'll see you.
Hey.
There you go.
Thanks.
- Hey, did you get my message? - Yeah, that's why I'm here.
- Can we sit down for a second? - Sure.
Listen, I'm sorry for causing a scene at the apartment.
I hope that you and Felicity worked that out.
Yeah.
I gotta talk to you.
The flowers were a lot, but I really wanted to say thank you.
It's getting kind of embarrassing.
How many other times are you going to have to save my life? None.
We went through an intense experience.
I understand that.
But you have to understand that it was just a moment.
Oh, Ben, please don't say that.
You're the only person that understands what I went through.
That's not true.
I talked to your roommates.
I called them.
They want to help you.
Janine and Samantha.
They want to help you.
You just have to let them.
And more importantly, I really think you gotta go back and you gotta talk to a therapist.
I do.
I just I can't be there for you anymore.
I am I am in love with Felicity.
So I can't call you if I need to? No.
I'm sorry.
Look, I gotta get back to work.
I really am sorry.
Good-bye.
Good-bye.
Hey.
Ben thinks that you're trying to break us up.
Noel.
I shouldn't say anything.
- What does that mean? - Nothing.
I should just keep my mouth shut.
No, because I'm asking you.
That's not what you're doing with the whole Seattle thing? - If I start talking about this now - Come on, I asked you.
What's going on? No.
I am not trying to break you up.
- Right.
That's what I thought.
I told him that.
- Yeah.
But uh I was thinking, you know.
And I don't know if if you realize, I mean, how much we're actually going to miss each other when you know, when we live in different cities.
- I know.
- No, I mean, I don't think you've thought it through like I have, because I'm the one doing the actual moving.
I mean, we depend on each other.
What we have, what we've been through, like T.
P.
Ing this library.
I know.
Yeah.
I think we take that for granted.
I'm going to miss you so much.
Yeah.
What? Just tell me one thing.
OK.
One thing.
Tell me that you don't still have feelings for me, too.
- Hi.
- Hey, you got your eyes back.
- Wow.
They're nice.
- You're the beautiful voice.
I think Ben and I just broke up.
Nothing happened.
Being up there made me realize that I didn't want to be up there.
It made me realize I wanted to be here with you.
Are you sure? Mr.
Fitzgerald, I so appreciate the fact that you're trying to support the Pacific Northwest's cultural community.
I mean, I've never been there, but I think that innovation, diversity, and access to the arts is a great thing.
Mr.
Crane, give me a situation in which you failed - and how you handled that.
- What? Give me a situation in which you failed and how you handled that.
- He's not going to ask those questions.
- What are you Do you want my help or not? I went to Harvard Business School.
Summer program.
I know what I'm talking about.
- What are those things on your face? - Pore suckers.
I have this huge event coming up.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Owww! - You all right? Oh, my God.
- Is Ben here? - Uh, no.
No, he's not.
Do you want to come in? OK.
Has he gotten any of my messages? Yeah, I've told him you called.
But you know Ben.
No, I don't.
Maybe that's part of the problem.
What do you mean? Well, I assumed he was I don't know.
Nothing.
Yeah, I know he can be pretty irresponsible sometimes.
I'm just confused.
I asked him to go to Southampton, we went together, we had a really good time.
Something happened? Yeah.
* Can you become * * Can you become * * A new version of you * * New wallpaper * * New shoe leather * * A new way home * * Dont remember * * New Version of you * * I need a new version of me * * New version of you * * I need a new version of me * - Hey.
What are you doing? - I'm studying.
- You're what? - I'm studying.
Really? I thought I could do pretty well on finals this year, so I thought I'd just approach the whole thing a little differently.
- That's great.
- Yeah.
Uh, hey.
The the episode, uh, 18, Georgia files.
- Did you erase them? - Uh, no.
They're on your computer.
- You sure you didn't erase them? - No, I didn't erase them.
- I'll be out in just a second.
- Thanks, and hurry.
Yeah.
She said she'd be there in a second.
That guy's driving me nuts.
- Noel? - Yes, Noel.
Sorry.
I'm a little anxious.
The foundation called back.
I have my second interview today.
Oh, my God, Noel! That is great! Yeah.
Yeah.
I've been terrified for days.
You know, I mean, this is this is real.
No matter what I've done, there's always been the safety net that was just college.
You know? But, yeah, this is real.
This is like that first job.
- You're going to be great.
- Yeah.
I hope so.
You could've just said, "Hey, can I have the paper?" - He's annoying the hell out of me.
- There it is.
Georgia files.
I saved it under "Geo.
" What are you doing? "What am I doing?" I'm making breakfast.
First of all, who puts peanut butter on a bagel? - You ever tried it? - Secondly, did you notice anything interesting about that bagel? It was toasted, it was on a plate, someone had prepared it? - Toast another one! - There are no other ones.
- Have the bagel! - I don't want a bagel with peanut butter.
- Noel, what's your problem? - You're my problem.
You don't think.
I don't know what's going on with you guys, but it's annoying.
Look.
No bagel.
Learning requires an open mind! OK, so now I'm supposed to tell you what I think that means? You know what? Can you just hold on a second? It's Reading Week, people, and some of us are trying to read! - Wow.
Thanks! - No problem.
So, where were we? - Um, learning requires an open mind.
- Oh, right.
That was funny.
Hello! We're in here, trying not to fail our MCATs.
And they're tomorrow.
Oh.
OK, well, I'll be really quiet.
I'll be as quiet as a mouse.
You won't even know I'm here.
Sorry.
Is your place any quieter than this? Actually, I've got a hotel room for tonight.
Everybody does that before the MCATs.
- They do? - Yeah.
It's a quiet place to study and you can get a good night's sleep.
Why didn't I think of that? It's no problem.
You can stay with me if you want.
- It's already booked.
- Uh, um, no.
I'll be fine.
OK, I'll pay half! What the hell happened to your face? Don't worry about it.
I got a surprise for you.
Ready? - I'm gonna have a bar mitzvah! - What? - It's the Jewish rite of passage.
- I know what a bar mitzvah is.
But didn't you have one when you were a kid? No.
That's the thing.
My parents never really believed in religion when I was growing up, so I didn't have one, but I can have one now, so I'm gonna do it.
- What do you think? - That's my surprise? Yeah.
Isn't it great? I have not been shooting the Shabbat with Rabbi Levin for two months.
I've been working at this.
My Torah portion, the whole thing.
So we'll have a ceremony and then we'll have a little party afterwards.
And then, you know, under Jewish custom, I'll officially be a man.
Finally.
That's funny.
I'm talking about my Jewish heritage and you're making jokes, which is fine, but just don't do that tonight.
- Tonight? - Rabbi Levin's coming for dinner.
- I'm thinking about ordering in Chinese.
- Why don't you let me cook dinner? - You'd do that for me? Yeah.
- I know how much this means to you.
- Ohh! You are the greatest.
- And, Sean? - Yeah.
For future reference, just, um, when you say you have a surprise for me, have a surprise for me.
Yeah.
That's OK.
The Wing Luke Asian Museum? Oh, uh, a museum in Seattle exploring the issues relating to art, history and culture of Asian Pacific Americans.
- Named after? - Wing Luke, Seattle city councilman, 1962.
- Hey, guys.
- Richard, what are you doing? Just trying to protect the school and my reputation.
- What are you talking about? - It's the end of the year.
You know what that means.
Senioritis.
All the kids are getting crazy ideas.
It's time to steal the mascot, put bubble bath in the fountain, T.
P.
The library.
Well, not on my watch.
- Nice uniform.
- I borrowed it from security.
I think it sends a strong message.
- It definitely does.
- I want people to know I'm out there.
I could be studying for my own finals, but I'm sacrificing that time to make sure our campus is prank-free.
We got a problem in sector four.
- Yeah, check that.
Be right there.
- I need backup.
If you guys could let me know of any suspicious activity.
- We'll we'll call you.
- Yeah.
Thanks.
Good to see you.
Noel? What's going on with you and Ben? - You guys have been acting so weird around each other.
- No, it's nothing.
You're lying, and I know you're lying.
I'm not.
I just don't want to talk about Ben.
- Why are you mad at him? - Can we just drop this? Is it something that I should know? I have to go.
I have an interview to get to, and you have a final.
I do, but I know you're trying to change the subject.
It's working, isn't it? - Good luck.
You're gonna do great.
- You too.
Good luck.
All right.
You have reached Blumberg Productions.
For Sean.
Press one.
For not Sean.
Press two.
Ben.
It's Samantha.
Avery's roommate.
Something's happened to Avery.
She's in trouble.
If you get this message.
Can you call me on my cell phone? 382 Hello? Hey.
Yeah.
What happened? Are you serious? - Hey.
- I wouldn't have called, but Avery insisted.
What happened? You said that they pumped her stomach? I think if you had returned her phone calls, she probably wouldn't be here.
- OK, what did she do? - Talk to her.
Avery.
Hey.
Hey.
Life is the greatest! Can you believe this? - Today was a good day.
- Oh, today was a great day.
It means that anything is possible, that the world is just one big, giant opportunity! Noel, I'm so happy for you.
- I'm happy for you.
- Mine was just a final! There's no such thing as "just a final," you know? It's still an obstacle.
I mean, whether it's a final or an interview, it's still something that we have to surmount.
- Is "surmount" a word? - Yeah, I think it is.
We gotta do something to celebrate.
Just something crazy.
- What do you want to do? - I don't know! We just gotta do something to cement this moment, so we won't forget that it ever happened! We should T.
P.
The library.
That would make Richard crazy! - No, I'm kidding.
- I know, but you're a genius.
We can't T.
P.
The library! - Why not? - Because that's stupid! And because I got caught breaking into the pool and - I got in big trouble.
If I get caught - No, no, no.
I've been here for four years, for 48 months of my life.
If I don't do something, just one thing that's stupid and idiotic before I leave, then We gotta do it.
OK? The time is now.
While we still can.
- I can't believe this! - Come on! I got the job.
I'm I'm moving to Seattle.
You're moving to Seattle.
Yeah.
I guess I am.
Don't you think when people do pranks, they think it's more funny than stupid? But I just think this is stupid.
Well, this part is stupid.
Sitting here with a bunch of toilet paper waiting for the library to close, that's stupid.
But the actual throwing of the paper, that's going to be fun.
OK? I promise you.
Get into the spirit.
It's gonna be fun.
- I'm in the spirit.
I'm here.
- I know.
I know you already told me, but what is this job in Seattle, exactly? Oh.
Easy.
Um Quentin Fitzgerald, that computer billionaire in Seattle? - Uh, no.
- You don't know who he is? - No.
- He's starting this foundation for the arts.
They're looking for graphic designers to head up different sections of the Web site, and I'm gonna be in charge of managing the whole thing.
So, like, I'm going to have people working for me.
Like artists from all around the world, you know? It's like going to grad school and getting paid for it.
Noel, I'm gonna miss you.
- What? - You could work for me.
I have to hire a coordinator to work with all these artists.
It would be a dream job.
Would you consider something like that? Oh, my God! It was all a mistake.
They did some blood tests and a mental status exam and they wanted to keep me overnight, but I told them I'm fine.
They said I could go home.
Avery? Tell me what happened.
After the shooting, I was prescribed these pills because I was having nightmares and the doctor said that it would help with the anxiety.
But, you know, I was doing a lot better.
And then, last night, I- I just I didn't feel like myself.
I just felt lost and confused.
So I took two.
But they didn't do anything.
So l I took two more.
I don't know how many I took.
Were you Were you trying to kill yourself? No.
* Look-a-look around and you'll find * * I've wasted my time * * I don't know * * If I've found the right door * * Turn, turn around and you'll see * * What has happened to me * * I dont know where Im going half the time * * He don't want me around * * We gotta meet back down on the ground * * He don't want me around * * We gotta meet back down on the ground * * Look, look around and you ask * * Can she make it that fast * * I don't know if I found the right road * * Come.
Come around.
Stop right there * * you might breathe free the air * * I dont know where Im doing half the time * Ooh.
The ham's almost ready.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
We can't have ham.
- Sean.
I'm kidding.
- It's chicken.
Relax.
- It is chicken.
- I'll get it.
You keep tossing.
- All right.
You must be Megan.
It is so great to meet you.
I'm Marissa Levin.
- The rabbi.
- You're the rabbi.
Can I? - Oh, yes, please.
- Thank you.
This is, um, Sean Your your Marissa is here.
Hey! I'm so glad you could make it.
- Good to see you.
- It's good to see you.
- So glad you could make it.
Oh, thank you! - It smells great.
- Yeah, that's Megan.
- Yeah.
She's talking about the food.
Can I talk to you in the kitchen? Yeah.
Why don't you find a seat, I'll get something to drink.
- Isn't she great? - Oh, she's fantastic.
- Don't you think you could've told me? - Told you what? - That Rabbi Levin looks like a Hooters girl! - Come on.
Now I know why you were so anxious to study! She's a Talmudic scholar.
Who looks like she could give a lap dance! Which is convenient.
OK.
Um, would you just give her a chance? We'll have dinner and you'll see that she's amazing.
She's here to help me with my bar mitzvah, Megan.
She's a rabbi.
- Does she have proof? Like an I.
D.
or something? - Stop it.
OK, um, how did I do? So far we both rocked it.
- Really? - Yeah.
I got a 31 on the Bio, - and you got a 32.
- Yes! Oh, my God.
Do you realize that in less than - How great is that? - You know where we should go after this? Where? - Coney Island.
- I'm a fiend for roller coasters! This is embarrassing.
I- I think I should go.
- DeForrest, this is your room.
- Yeah.
I know, but, uh, it's not a problem.
Just keep the room and and, uh, do good on your test tomorrow.
Break a femur.
Literally, this whole place was filled with Christmas trees.
- Really? - Yeah.
I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I always wanted a Christmas tree growing up.
- Are you kidding me? So did I! - Really? - Yeah, really! - We had one.
A Christmas tree.
Not being Jewish.
Oh, I was so jealous of people like you.
It looked like so much fun the tree, the presents, the fake snow.
- Oh, yeah.
- It was great.
- Yeah.
- You know one thing we did have, though? - Brisket.
- True, true.
My mother's brisket is amazing.
Nobody made better brisket than my Gaboom.
It's my grandma.
Uh It was like a whole day process, too.
She'd go to the kosher butcher and pick out the right meat and everything.
And she'd sing.
She was so happy to be cooking.
She'd sing like - That's so funny.
- I know.
- Isn't it just beef? - What? - Brisket.
Y- yeah.
It-lt's beef.
You know what? I actually have to admit it.
I'm a little nervous about the bar mitzvah.
A little bit.
I think it's so great that you're doing this.
I am so proud of you.
It could be fun.
- It's gonna - Where you going? - Home! - Why? Oh, I really should be studying for finals.
And anyway, I don't want to break up any more of your intimate conversation.
So long! Thanks for stopping here with me.
I really just needed something to calm my nerves.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Thank you.
It's OK.
Thanks.
Since I've been back this last month, everything seems so screwed up.
All the things that I thought were important and valuable, all of sudden, they're not.
Yeah.
And my friends.
I don't want to say that they're shallow because that sounds mean, but Well, what about Samantha? She seems to care about you.
Yeah, I guess.
Maybe you should go talk to somebody, professionally.
What you went through is pretty traumatic.
That might help.
No, I did that already.
It didn't help.
OK.
I'm just lonely.
Were you serious about what you said before? - What? - About that job.
Yeah, I was serious! Ben and I haven't really talked about what we're gonna do this summer.
Just remember you'd have the best boss of all time.
- So it's something I can really think about? - Definitely think about it.
Yeah, I mean - Where've you been? - I was T.
P.
ing the library.
Noel got this really great job offer at this start-up webzine in Seattle, so we were celebrating.
- So you T.
P.
'd the library? - Yeah.
Actually, he thinks there might be a job for me there this summer.
Really? We haven't even talked about what we're gonna do over the summer yet.
It's not like I took the job.
I just, you know.
What? What's the matter? The thing is, on the way home from the library, I saw you with Avery.
I mean, I'm sure there's a rational explanation for it.
You should know, though, that it felt awful seeing you with her.
Well, I'm sure it did.
I'm sorry, but there is an explanation.
It just seems like there's always an explanation.
I was on my way out and her roommate called to tell me Avery was in the hospital.
She almost O.
D.
'd on these pills.
But she's OK? I mean, she's fine now but we didn't know for a while if she was going to be OK.
And then her roommate had to leave, so I had to take Avery home.
I'm sorry.
I know how this must make you feel.
I really am sorry.
The thing is, I feel bad for her.
It's just It's weird that she keeps showing up all the time.
It's awkward.
I know, and I think that's over.
I think she's done with that.
- OK? - OK.
If you want to sleep, I can go work in the living room.
No, I like having you here.
OK.
Hey.
Are we, um I mean, was there a real problem last night? 'Cause I haven't heard from you.
Nope.
No problem.
I just had work to do.
Look.
I know you may not totally understand the whole bar mitzvah thing No, no.
I understand, Sean.
I understand completely.
And actually, I thought about it a lot last night, and, uh, Rabbi Levin, she really opened my eyes.
She did? Oh, that's great.
I knew you'd come around.
So, listen to this.
I'm thinking about having a theme for the party, for the bar mitzvah.
I know that sounds lame, but if I was 13 there'd be no question.
I think you should be with Rabbi Levin.
Be with? What? Like in the biblical sense? - You're kidding.
Megan, she's my rabbi.
- So? I saw the way you were together last night, and it hit me.
You and I are just kidding ourselves.
We don't belong together.
I'm not Jewish, you're not Wiccan.
It's never gonna work.
- OK, we've been through this before.
- Yes, but the fact is, you and that rabbi, man, you're like meant for each other.
You have the same beliefs, the same interests.
You sing the same songs that have one-word lyrics.
Maybe she's not the girl you should be with specifically, but that's the kind of girl you should be with.
Because I can't do this anymore.
Pranksters! I have ways of exposing you, do you hear me? You're not going to get away with this! Hey! Where were you last night? - Avery almost O.
D.
'd? - Yeah.
Now I know that Ben had a reason to be with her.
Oh.
And that reason would be? She was hospitalized! Right.
- What? You're doing that thing again.
- What thing? Like you're going to tell me something, and then you don't.
No! I'm not doing No.
I'm thinking about the library.
I feel guilty about what we did, and Richard's gonna freak.
Richard's not gonna.
He can't do anything.
Besides, you already have a job.
- Did you tell Ben about Seattle? - Yes.
I mean, I mentioned it.
We didn't really talk about it.
We kind of got distracted with the whole Avery thing.
There's that look again.
Ben was just helping her.
I'm sure the whole Ben and Avery thing was completely innocent.
End of story.
Hey.
Hey! So, um, how did you do? Oh, you know, there's always Johns Hopkins University.
No MCAT test score required for admission.
Come on, you know you did fine.
Yeah, maybe.
I could always be a garbage man.
I heard that wasn't so bad.
But, no, listen.
Seriously, I wanted to, uh, say I'm sorry - Don't be.
- Last night was just You saved my life on this.
You know that, right? That means you gotta hire me when you open your practice.
I make a mean receptionist.
- Dr.
Elena Tyler's office.
Could you hold? - Stop it! - I'll see you.
- OK.
- Hey.
What is this? - Not right now, - I'm going to see my spiritual advisor.
- Yeah, but do you know what this is? Uh, yeah.
Noel made these while you were gallivanting around Southampton.
- He was trying to cheer Felicity up.
- I was not gallivanting.
It's got, like, dinner and movies and rollerblading.
What is that? It's a whole arts-and-crafts thing The back says "Breakup Kit" on it.
What's that about? Hey.
Avery.
How you doing? I'm sorry to bother you.
I wanted to give you these flowers and say thank you.
- Well, you don't have to thank me.
- I know.
I hate to run, but I gotta see a rabbi about a thing.
- Can I ask you a favor? - Yeah.
Can I crash here for a little while and study? I have so much work to do, and I don't feel like being alone.
Just for a little while.
Uh, yeah, I guess.
Yeah.
Look, I just gotta tell you that this this is making Felicity really uncomfortable.
I'll give you guys some privacy.
I'll be right back.
Hey.
What the hell did that mean? You guys might want to be alone to fool around some more.
What are you talking about? We've never fooled around.
You think I like being responsible for her? - You're so transparent.
- I'm "transparent"! What does that mean? Another damsel in distress saved by Ben.
Do you only save beautiful women? You'd love if Avery got between me and Felicity! - I think she already has.
- The only person getting between me and Felicity is you.
No, I'm offering her an amazing opportunity.
Like that's why you're inviting her! You know this would be great for her.
She might not go Because she wants to spend the summer with her boyfriend? Yeah, with a guy who lies to her.
You're a jealous little dick! - You think I'm jealous of you? - Yeah, yeah, I do! I'm not jealous of a guy who sleeps with Avery, then tells Felicity that nothing happened! - What is he talking about? - I have no idea! Nothing happened.
You said that something happened.
All right.
She kissed me.
One kiss.
Good luck.
See ya.
You said nothing happened.
- Yeah.
Nothing did happen.
- You kissed her in Southampton! No, I didn't kiss her.
She kissed me.
It meant nothing.
- So why didn't you tell me? - Because it was a stupid kiss! I told you.
I went up there confused.
I needed to figure things out, which I did.
- I want to be with you.
I don't want to be with her.
- What was she doing here? - She just showed up.
What was I supposed to do? - Say no? There has to be a reason you can't say no to her.
- Is there a reason Noel's giving you a breakup kit? - What? These stupid coupons He's in love with you.
We're talking about Avery.
I don't want her around you! - Well, I don't want you spending the summer with Noel.
- What? What do you mean, "what"? I don't! Ben, those are two completely different situations! I would be going there for a job! Avery's this girl who clearly has deep feelings for you - Like Noel has for you! - No, it's not the same thing! Noel has feelings! He's one of my closest friends! That doesn't mean he's not trying to break us up! I don't know what else to say.
- Well, what are you gonna do? - I don't know.
Oh, no.
Did it go that badly? Everything is fine.
So why are you vigorously scrubbing out our refrigerator? - Because I'm a bigot.
- What? Before I knew what DeForrest looked like, I liked him.
I mean, we have the best time together.
He's funny, and smart, and sweet.
The only reason we're not dating is the way he looks.
I'm sure that DeForrest is like, a totally cool person, but you can't help it if there isn't any chemistry between you.
Where are you going? To a learning situation which requires an open mind.
Is that Mother of God.
Noel Crane! How could you stab me in the back like that? Ugh.
Keep eating.
I'm getting my stuff.
Going back to my apartment.
- No.
No you're not.
- Excuse me? Excuse me, OK? I went and I saw the rabbi today.
Oh.
Let me guess.
You're engaged.
Not funny.
She actually has some pretty good thoughts.
- Did you say thoughts, or thongs? - Have a little respect! She's a woman of God.
She thinks that it might be good for us to go to therapy.
Oh, my God.
Are you kidding? Couples therapy is crap.
You're a psychology major.
You're supposed to believe in that crap! I don't.
We don't need it.
- We don't? - No! What couples break up and get back together every single week? What Goths do you know that date practicing Jews? We have plenty of issues to discuss! Yes, that is my point.
We're too different.
No! The point is we're great together.
This is the best relationship that I have ever had! - We'll go to couples counseling.
- Fine! - Good! - Good! Hi.
Hey.
What's up? I was just thinking about, you know, the other night.
You know, and how great you were.
And how smart and funny you are, and Are you dumping me? Because I didn't know we were dating.
- You didn't have to do that.
- I wanted to.
You wanted to, or you thought you should? - That was not a pity kiss.
- I didn't use the word "pity.
" I was thinking it, I just didn't use it.
I don't want that kind of favor.
I don't need to be part of anyone's experiment to see what it's like to be romantic with a guy they would be attracted to if he wasn't so huge.
I think you just called me shallow.
I didn't use that word, either.
But it's not your fault.
You know? You were just being kind.
But no, thanks.
I'll see you.
Hey.
There you go.
Thanks.
- Hey, did you get my message? - Yeah, that's why I'm here.
- Can we sit down for a second? - Sure.
Listen, I'm sorry for causing a scene at the apartment.
I hope that you and Felicity worked that out.
Yeah.
I gotta talk to you.
The flowers were a lot, but I really wanted to say thank you.
It's getting kind of embarrassing.
How many other times are you going to have to save my life? None.
We went through an intense experience.
I understand that.
But you have to understand that it was just a moment.
Oh, Ben, please don't say that.
You're the only person that understands what I went through.
That's not true.
I talked to your roommates.
I called them.
They want to help you.
Janine and Samantha.
They want to help you.
You just have to let them.
And more importantly, I really think you gotta go back and you gotta talk to a therapist.
I do.
I just I can't be there for you anymore.
I am I am in love with Felicity.
So I can't call you if I need to? No.
I'm sorry.
Look, I gotta get back to work.
I really am sorry.
Good-bye.
Good-bye.
Hey.
Ben thinks that you're trying to break us up.
Noel.
I shouldn't say anything.
- What does that mean? - Nothing.
I should just keep my mouth shut.
No, because I'm asking you.
That's not what you're doing with the whole Seattle thing? - If I start talking about this now - Come on, I asked you.
What's going on? No.
I am not trying to break you up.
- Right.
That's what I thought.
I told him that.
- Yeah.
But uh I was thinking, you know.
And I don't know if if you realize, I mean, how much we're actually going to miss each other when you know, when we live in different cities.
- I know.
- No, I mean, I don't think you've thought it through like I have, because I'm the one doing the actual moving.
I mean, we depend on each other.
What we have, what we've been through, like T.
P.
Ing this library.
I know.
Yeah.
I think we take that for granted.
I'm going to miss you so much.
Yeah.
What? Just tell me one thing.
OK.
One thing.
Tell me that you don't still have feelings for me, too.