Adventure Time with Finn & Jake s03e16 Episode Script
Jake vs. Me-Mow
[ mouse squeaks.]
[ penguins chirp.]
[all cheering .]
[screeches.]
Adventure time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end It's Adventure Time [ high-pitched humming .]
Huh? [ humming resumes.]
You got a lot of meat, Wildberry Princess.
Yeah, you know.
Thanks for cook-a-looking for us.
Oh, you're welcome, Finn, and thank you for answering my urgent summons.
Hey, yeah.
How can we aid thee? [ chomp.]
Oh, it's nothing, really.
Someone's trying to kill me.
Pbbbbbbht! [ coughs, gags.]
Still tastes good.
It's no big deal.
Finish your pie.
It is a big deal, and I demand deets.
Okay.
I'm listening, but I'm gonna keep eating.
[ munches.]
I suspect that I've been targeted by the guild of assassins.
Whoa! How do you know? I found this note stabbed to my doorman.
[gasps.]
Princess, we vow to protect your juice.
Right, Jake? [slobbering, munching .]
[ muffled .]
Sometimes I think there's a monster who lives in my stomach, and that's why I'm hungry all the time.
[ chuckles.]
[slobbering, munching .]
Uhprincess, let's continue this briefing outside.
I can't look at his mouth when he gets like this.
[ belches.]
[ clunk! .]
[ munching .]
Mmm! Princess, want me to finish off your pie? [as Princess Wildberry.]
Yes, Jake --all my pies.
[ chuckling .]
[ munching .]
[ normal voice.]
Hmm? Hmm.
[giggles.]
A tiny cat.
[screeches.]
Whoa! [splat .]
Quiet, or you die! [gasps.]
You're the assassin! Me-mow -- assassin, second class.
But once I take out a Princess I "gadruate" to full membership! Well, I'm no Princess, sister! Yes, I know, but since you've blown my cover, you will slay Wildberry Princess! What?! I'd rather be injected with poison! Oh.
Uh Okay.
UmI mean I will assassinate Wildberry Princess! Good.
Oh, and if you try to trick me, I'll poison you.
[thunk.]
[stuffily.]
My nose! [echoing .]
Wow, it's like warm garbage up in here! Youyou done in there, Jake? Oh! Uh, yeah! So, um, Wildberry Princess -- So, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to bekilled.
W-w-why would you say that? Dude! Are you trying to freak her out? I don't know.
I'm just thinking out loud here.
Are you trying to freak me out? Aw, I'm sorry, Wildberry Princess.
[jingling .]
Uh, you should let medo something.
And it will begood.
What's going on out there? Takethis! Andthat! Ooh, how do you like this, Princess? Ooh! Uh, that'sverygood? I'm gonna pick you up now and carry you to the window! Jake, what are you? No! Stop! Please! [whistle! .]
[splat! .]
Wildberry Princess is dead! Shh.
[ting! .]
You did it! Well done! I guess I'll be on my way.
Princess! Oh, princess! You're alive! We saw your crown next to a pile of dirty meat.
Then we slipped on the meat! And I thought I tasted your juice.
[sobbing .]
But it was just blood from the meat! We're so glad it wasn't actually you! [snarls.]
You liar! [squish .]
[groans.]
Jake? Okay, Jake.
I've injected you with half the poison, and you'll be dead in 30 minutes, unless you kill the Princess, which is when I'll give you the antidote.
Finn! Help me! What's wrong? If you say anything, I'll stab you in the brain! Uh Finn! Sing mom's lullaby! I'm so tired, Finn -- from the meat.
Please? You have to lull me to sleep.
Uh I know you carry mom's music box around in your backpack! Dude, I'm not gonna sing mom's lullaby in front of other people! Please? Ple-e-e-ase? All right.
Real quick, while the Princess is distracted.
[ music box chimes.]
[soft music plays.]
Don't be weepy, sleepy puppies Slip your slippers on your footies In the morning, you'll get goodies Puppy hats and puppy hoodies No stripes or polka dots Heather gray and feather soft Baby pink or baby blu-u-u-u-u-e All the drawstrings you can chew Finn, there's an assassin in my nose and she poisoned me and is making me kill Wildberry Princess! Dude, stop playing games! This is serious! [grunts.]
[smack! .]
[squishing .]
"Catnoise"? Oh, cats go meow! [loudly meowing .]
[groans.]
Shh! [ rapidly meowing .]
Shh! Shh! Shh! [ muffled meowing .]
[ muffled .]
Jake! Jake! What are you doing?! Sorry.
[whistle! .]
[splat! .]
Me-mow, still asleep? [snores.]
Gonna double-cross Jake [snores.]
and leave him to die.
[snoring .]
[ creaking .]
[ breathing heavily.]
[shing! .]
[gasps.]
[scratch! scratch! .]
Phew! If I can just grab that antidote [squish, squish! plink! .]
Aha! [scraping .]
Puppyhoodies [snores.]
I did it.
[ footsteps approach .]
What the flop, Jake?! [gasps.]
Treachery! Hyaaaah! Ooh! Time's running out, Jake.
Do you want the antidote or not? [groans.]
What is wrong with you? Hey, everybody.
Everything's cool.
Everything's not cool! Wildberry Princess is still in danger! Right.
Right.
[groans.]
Well, we should take her somewhere safer.
Do not make me give you the rest! I know where to stash you, Princess.
Follow me! Ooh.
[dramatic music plays.]
Here, nobody can take us by surprise.
Finn, stand here with your back to the cliff.
I'll stay with W.
B.
! Then do what must be done.
[ clicks tongue.]
WILDBERRY PRINCESS: Oh, my! Look at how close to the edge I am.
[groans.]
Do it, Jake.
Do it! [ bird chirps.]
II I probably shouldn't! [zoom! thump! .]
Ugh! [gasps.]
Jake! I'mfull ofpoison.
The assassin! The name's Me-mow.
If you let Jake die, so help me, I will kill you, too! Try it, oaf! Give me the antidote! [grunting .]
[whoosh! .]
[shing! .]
Face me, cat! [ coughs.]
[scraping .]
Ugh! [groans.]
[shing! .]
[shing! .]
[screams.]
Give it up, Me-mow! You're only making my face look cooler! [shing! .]
[scrapes.]
You're at my mercy! Ha! You think you're hurting me with that tiny dagger? We'll see who's laughing When you're blind! [ inhales deeply.]
[exhales sharply.]
[thud! .]
[shing! .]
[groans.]
[gasps.]
It's over! Give me the antidote! What, this antidote? No! Youmilk-lapper! Jake, come lick this tree bark! I'm coming.
[ bell tolls.]
Forget it, kid.
I gave jake enough poison to kill a dog 50 times his size.
Oh, no.
[sniffles.]
[whimpers.]
BOTH: Wait! Oh, yeah! [ breathes deeply.]
[zoom! .]
Dog liver times 51! A magic dog? Nooooooo! How you feeling, dude? Big liver! Big liver, yeah! You've ruined me! I have to wait a whole year to retake the assassin's test! Oh! Why don't I make you my royal pet? Hyah! [ pop! .]
Oh, dear.
Nice defense mechanism, Wild B! Are you naked? Oh, no.
This is a medical condition.
I need a hospital.
[groans.]
We all need a hospital.
[laughter.]
[ bird chirping .]
[ ominous music plays.]
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree
[ penguins chirp.]
[all cheering .]
[screeches.]
Adventure time Come on, grab your friends We'll go to very distant lands With Jake the dog and Finn the human The fun will never end It's Adventure Time [ high-pitched humming .]
Huh? [ humming resumes.]
You got a lot of meat, Wildberry Princess.
Yeah, you know.
Thanks for cook-a-looking for us.
Oh, you're welcome, Finn, and thank you for answering my urgent summons.
Hey, yeah.
How can we aid thee? [ chomp.]
Oh, it's nothing, really.
Someone's trying to kill me.
Pbbbbbbht! [ coughs, gags.]
Still tastes good.
It's no big deal.
Finish your pie.
It is a big deal, and I demand deets.
Okay.
I'm listening, but I'm gonna keep eating.
[ munches.]
I suspect that I've been targeted by the guild of assassins.
Whoa! How do you know? I found this note stabbed to my doorman.
[gasps.]
Princess, we vow to protect your juice.
Right, Jake? [slobbering, munching .]
[ muffled .]
Sometimes I think there's a monster who lives in my stomach, and that's why I'm hungry all the time.
[ chuckles.]
[slobbering, munching .]
Uhprincess, let's continue this briefing outside.
I can't look at his mouth when he gets like this.
[ belches.]
[ clunk! .]
[ munching .]
Mmm! Princess, want me to finish off your pie? [as Princess Wildberry.]
Yes, Jake --all my pies.
[ chuckling .]
[ munching .]
[ normal voice.]
Hmm? Hmm.
[giggles.]
A tiny cat.
[screeches.]
Whoa! [splat .]
Quiet, or you die! [gasps.]
You're the assassin! Me-mow -- assassin, second class.
But once I take out a Princess I "gadruate" to full membership! Well, I'm no Princess, sister! Yes, I know, but since you've blown my cover, you will slay Wildberry Princess! What?! I'd rather be injected with poison! Oh.
Uh Okay.
UmI mean I will assassinate Wildberry Princess! Good.
Oh, and if you try to trick me, I'll poison you.
[thunk.]
[stuffily.]
My nose! [echoing .]
Wow, it's like warm garbage up in here! Youyou done in there, Jake? Oh! Uh, yeah! So, um, Wildberry Princess -- So, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to bekilled.
W-w-why would you say that? Dude! Are you trying to freak her out? I don't know.
I'm just thinking out loud here.
Are you trying to freak me out? Aw, I'm sorry, Wildberry Princess.
[jingling .]
Uh, you should let medo something.
And it will begood.
What's going on out there? Takethis! Andthat! Ooh, how do you like this, Princess? Ooh! Uh, that'sverygood? I'm gonna pick you up now and carry you to the window! Jake, what are you? No! Stop! Please! [whistle! .]
[splat! .]
Wildberry Princess is dead! Shh.
[ting! .]
You did it! Well done! I guess I'll be on my way.
Princess! Oh, princess! You're alive! We saw your crown next to a pile of dirty meat.
Then we slipped on the meat! And I thought I tasted your juice.
[sobbing .]
But it was just blood from the meat! We're so glad it wasn't actually you! [snarls.]
You liar! [squish .]
[groans.]
Jake? Okay, Jake.
I've injected you with half the poison, and you'll be dead in 30 minutes, unless you kill the Princess, which is when I'll give you the antidote.
Finn! Help me! What's wrong? If you say anything, I'll stab you in the brain! Uh Finn! Sing mom's lullaby! I'm so tired, Finn -- from the meat.
Please? You have to lull me to sleep.
Uh I know you carry mom's music box around in your backpack! Dude, I'm not gonna sing mom's lullaby in front of other people! Please? Ple-e-e-ase? All right.
Real quick, while the Princess is distracted.
[ music box chimes.]
[soft music plays.]
Don't be weepy, sleepy puppies Slip your slippers on your footies In the morning, you'll get goodies Puppy hats and puppy hoodies No stripes or polka dots Heather gray and feather soft Baby pink or baby blu-u-u-u-u-e All the drawstrings you can chew Finn, there's an assassin in my nose and she poisoned me and is making me kill Wildberry Princess! Dude, stop playing games! This is serious! [grunts.]
[smack! .]
[squishing .]
"Catnoise"? Oh, cats go meow! [loudly meowing .]
[groans.]
Shh! [ rapidly meowing .]
Shh! Shh! Shh! [ muffled meowing .]
[ muffled .]
Jake! Jake! What are you doing?! Sorry.
[whistle! .]
[splat! .]
Me-mow, still asleep? [snores.]
Gonna double-cross Jake [snores.]
and leave him to die.
[snoring .]
[ creaking .]
[ breathing heavily.]
[shing! .]
[gasps.]
[scratch! scratch! .]
Phew! If I can just grab that antidote [squish, squish! plink! .]
Aha! [scraping .]
Puppyhoodies [snores.]
I did it.
[ footsteps approach .]
What the flop, Jake?! [gasps.]
Treachery! Hyaaaah! Ooh! Time's running out, Jake.
Do you want the antidote or not? [groans.]
What is wrong with you? Hey, everybody.
Everything's cool.
Everything's not cool! Wildberry Princess is still in danger! Right.
Right.
[groans.]
Well, we should take her somewhere safer.
Do not make me give you the rest! I know where to stash you, Princess.
Follow me! Ooh.
[dramatic music plays.]
Here, nobody can take us by surprise.
Finn, stand here with your back to the cliff.
I'll stay with W.
B.
! Then do what must be done.
[ clicks tongue.]
WILDBERRY PRINCESS: Oh, my! Look at how close to the edge I am.
[groans.]
Do it, Jake.
Do it! [ bird chirps.]
II I probably shouldn't! [zoom! thump! .]
Ugh! [gasps.]
Jake! I'mfull ofpoison.
The assassin! The name's Me-mow.
If you let Jake die, so help me, I will kill you, too! Try it, oaf! Give me the antidote! [grunting .]
[whoosh! .]
[shing! .]
Face me, cat! [ coughs.]
[scraping .]
Ugh! [groans.]
[shing! .]
[shing! .]
[screams.]
Give it up, Me-mow! You're only making my face look cooler! [shing! .]
[scrapes.]
You're at my mercy! Ha! You think you're hurting me with that tiny dagger? We'll see who's laughing When you're blind! [ inhales deeply.]
[exhales sharply.]
[thud! .]
[shing! .]
[groans.]
[gasps.]
It's over! Give me the antidote! What, this antidote? No! Youmilk-lapper! Jake, come lick this tree bark! I'm coming.
[ bell tolls.]
Forget it, kid.
I gave jake enough poison to kill a dog 50 times his size.
Oh, no.
[sniffles.]
[whimpers.]
BOTH: Wait! Oh, yeah! [ breathes deeply.]
[zoom! .]
Dog liver times 51! A magic dog? Nooooooo! How you feeling, dude? Big liver! Big liver, yeah! You've ruined me! I have to wait a whole year to retake the assassin's test! Oh! Why don't I make you my royal pet? Hyah! [ pop! .]
Oh, dear.
Nice defense mechanism, Wild B! Are you naked? Oh, no.
This is a medical condition.
I need a hospital.
[groans.]
We all need a hospital.
[laughter.]
[ bird chirping .]
[ ominous music plays.]
Come along with me And the butterflies and bees We can wander through the forest And do so as we please Come along with me To a cliff under a tree