Beverly Hills, 90210 (1990) s03e16 Episode Script

Clarence? Clarence? Clarence? I heard you the first time.
This better be good.
I wouldn't be bothering someone with your busy schedule if I didn't think it was at least a Code Two.
Famines and floods are Code Two.
Tornadoes and earthquakes are Code Two.
All right, all right, so maybe it's a Code Three.
I haven't memorized the manual yet.
Well, memorize it and get back to me.
But by then it will be too late.
And a lot of people's Christmases will be ruined forever - and I'll never get my wings - All right.
All right.
Just stop talking and show me what you got.
And it better be good.
Here we come a-caroling Among the leaves so green Miriam, Where are we? This is West Beverly High and those kids walking down the hall are the West Beverly High Madrigal Singers.
A happy New Year And God send you A happy New Year God bless the master of this house Likewise the mistress too That's David Silver with the video camera.
And that's his girlfriend, Donna Martin, an angel on earth if ever there was one.
Oh, I just love the holidays.
I remember when I was a little girl, we used to sing - Miriam.
- Sorry.
Moving on.
Now here's Dylan and Kelly and Brenda and they are the best of friends.
Hello, guys, wrapping presents today? Oh, sorry.
Here comes Geraldo Junior.
Bren, you got a minute for an interview? - Sure.
- Okay, wait, wait, wait.
Okay, Bren.
So all the money we've raised has gone to buy these toys for the kids at the Alvarado Street Elementary School, and which Santa's helpers have been busy wrapping for the past two weeks.
Oh, don't forget to say this is a West Beverly tradition.
That's our senior class liaison for this year's adopt-a-school programme.
Take it away, Donna.
No, that's okay, I don't have anything else These kids have problems? They're too good-looking to have problems.
Well, according to section 16B of the manual: "Physical appearance should not be used to determine worthiness.
" Thank you for explaining that to me, Miriam.
- I was just making a comment.
- Sorry.
'Twas the day before midterms And all through the school The teachers were jamming The students were cool - Who are they? - The editors of the school newspaper.
The Blaze staff kicked butt To put the paper to bed While visions of vacations Danced in their heads For the record, I just want to make it clear, they did not learn this in Honours English.
We did.
A troublemaker, huh? Well, Steve gets into his fair share of trouble, but he's the only one I'm not worried about.
You know, I walk into that detention and my watch stops.
Time stands still.
It's lethal in there.
Well, we finished wrapping the gifts for the Alvarado Street kids in record time.
Now all we need is a Santa.
Hey, don't look at me.
I'm covering the event for the Blaze.
I'm taping the whole thing, so you can count me out.
Donna, you know I'd love to do it but I'm barred from all school activities until the end of time.
That leaves only one person, Donna.
Dyl-wig.
"Ho!" like a Santa.
No.
No.
No.
Nice group of kids, don't you think? What I think is you're wasting my time.
These kids don't need any help.
Well, sure, they look fine there but that was two days ago.
Look at them now.
Deck the hall with boughs of holly What's wrong with them? Not them.
Them.
- Yeah, they don't look so festive.
- See? - I told you.
- So? It's a routine example of seasonal apathy and depression.
Happens all the time during the holidays.
The man upstairs doesn't have time for a bunch of self-absorbed kids - and neither do I.
- Wait.
Clarence, come on.
This is much more serious than you think.
At least give me a chance to make a presentation.
Oh, please.
You know, I'm missing Circus Of The Stars for this.
Once you see the bigger picture, you'll be hooked, I promise.
Just give me the highlights.
Save the rest for the reunion movie.
Okay, well, let's go back a couple of days.
Brandon and Andrea are the editors of the newspaper.
I know who they are, Miriam.
So, Andrea, what's the lead story in your special Christmas edition? An exclusive interview with Ms.
Claus.
It is the Year of the Woman up in the North Pole.
Don't mind her, she's on a roll.
What can I say, I lost my crutches and I regained my sense of humour.
Now, this phone call is from her grandma.
See, she lives with her grandmother so she Let me listen.
Hello.
West Beverly Blaze.
Did you open it? No.
Don't, open it, Grandma.
It's a letter from Yale.
Look, is it a thick envelope, or a thin envelope? Thanks for calling, Grandma.
Yeah, have a good kaluki game.
I'll see you when you get home, okay? Okay, great.
Thin envelope, huh? Well, at least there was a letter from Jay, the mail's not all that bad.
Hey, you don't know what it says yet.
Look, Gil, we all know that a thick envelope means you got in, and a thin envelope means "We regret to inform you, but" Yeah, but that's what they should say in your case, right? No way.
They must have a different system for early admission.
I bet they just took one look at her application and said, "Reject.
" I'll bet you she got accepted.
How much? You wanna bet me? For money? No, we should let Andrea set the stakes.
We should let Andrea jump off a bridge.
I think we should go to Andrea's house right now and check this out before you leap to any conclusions.
What do you say? I can't open it.
- I can't.
- Fine, I'll open it.
No.
Okay.
No.
You know what, I'm gonna open Jay's letter first.
Andrea, open the letter.
Okay.
Okay, I'm gonna do it.
Here goes nothing.
I can't handle this.
So, what does it say? "Congratulations.
" It says congratulations.
That's fantastic.
What did I tell you, huh? You see, you're a Yalie now.
One of the cultural elite.
How does that feel? I can't wait, I gotta tell Meyers.
- He's gotta pay up on his bet.
- Good.
I'm gonna make him shave his beard.
See what he looks like in the nude.
I gotta call Jay.
He secretly didn't want me to get into Yale, he wanted me to go to Northwestern with him.
Or end up in California University with me.
Yeah, well, that was my safe school, is all.
I can't believe this.
Do you realise this puts you in, like, the top one percent of all intelligent life on the planet? This is outstanding.
So, what's the Jay-man say? Andrea? Talk about having no class.
What kind of guy breaks up with his girlfriend by sending her a letter? A coward.
You know, I never liked Jay.
You didn't like Jay because he's a Young Republican.
That had nothing to do with it.
Well, maybe it had a little to do with it.
But, you know, I always just knew that he was wrong for Andrea.
Of course, I never said anything, because I didn't wanna seem like I was being - Jealous? - Bitter? Petty? Thank you, family, for my warm holiday character profile.
You won't mind if I chop down your tree.
Come on, Brandon, we were just teasing you.
We know that you and Andrea have always had a special relationship.
Well, in case you haven't noticed, Nikki and I have an even more special relationship.
Yeah, we've noticed.
You mean, Brandon and Brenda are brother and sister? - They're twins.
- Why didn't you say so? Because you kept telling me to shut up.
Well, in a nice way, of course.
Hi.
Can't beat Christmas at the Walsh house.
Come in.
Wow, what a pretty tree.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
- Let's study.
- No, I wanna trim the tree.
Oh, come on, Bren, anything beats studying.
Come on in.
This one's broken, skip it.
Yo.
Did you guys hear that Andrea got into Yale? Don't you just love the Walshes? - Nice family.
Good values.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Tell me about the blond.
Does she have something going with the guy with the sideburns? Well, not exactly.
It's more of a three-way, triangular sort of thing.
So how come you didn't tell me about them earlier? Because I started with Brandon and Andrea.
Now, can I go on, please? You're coming back to this triangle thing, right? Yes, Clarence.
But first we have to go back to the teacher who lost his bet.
West Beverly offers many exciting elective courses, such as Shaving 103, for the hygienically inclined.
Okay, I pay my debts, but this is ridiculous.
Okay, I changed my mind, you don't have to shave it off.
- Now you tell me.
- No, actually it's a good look for you.
It goes perfectly with your split personality.
- Funny.
- Now, is this the kind of nutty banter that goes on at Yale? No, all the real funny stuff is done in Latin.
You better start boning up, Andrea.
If you don't mind, I'll finish shaving in the bathroom.
See you, Gil.
- Take care, Gil.
- Thanks, Andrea.
David, what's wrong? You're so quiet.
I don't know.
I just sort of feel out of it.
Why? Well, Andrea's the first.
But everyone will be getting into their colleges and I'll be left here by myself in high school.
Jay's got pretty good timing, huh? I used to think getting into Yale was my heart's desire.
Oh, well.
So you wanna go to the movies tonight? I can't, Nikki's due in from San Francisco in a couple of hours.
And you two wanna be alone? Well, we've got a little catching up to do.
Oh, hey, don't worry.
No one's coming in.
I've got them well trained.
Brandon, have you? - I'm sorry.
- Mom.
- I'm really sorry.
- No, it's okay.
No problem.
Thanks, Mom.
Sorry about that.
- Brandon - You know, I really missed you.
I missed you too.
Thanks.
You know, you didn't call me back last weekend.
I was a little worried.
Well, I wanted to talk to you in person.
It was really intense up there.
You said you were getting along with your parents.
I did.
That's the problem.
What do you mean? Well, with Diesel out of the picture, it was like old times.
We were really a family again.
So? So, I'm moving back home, Brandon.
Really.
- When? - Tomorrow.
They want me home for the holidays and I've got a lot of school stuff to straighten out up there.
I had to come back and get my stuff and see you again.
And say thank you.
And wish you a merry Christmas.
- I didn't see that coming.
- You ain't seen nothing yet.
Well, he'll be okay.
There's a lot of fish in the sea, he'll have plenty of girlfriends.
Not if he gets on that bus.
Brandon, do you have any pull with the yearbook editor? Because I have two nominations for "Most Conniving.
" Kelly Taylor and Dylan McKay.
I'm really not in the mood for this right now.
Or what about for the category of "Most Deceitful" or "Most Disloyal"? Let me guess.
Are you feeling the sting of rejection? Brandon, don't make fun of me.
I know it's been a while, but I'm sure you know how it feels.
Oh, yeah.
It's been a while, like about 90 minutes.
- What? - It seems Nikki just broke up with me.
Brandon, I'm sorry.
It's better for her.
She's moving back up north with her parents.
Long-distance relationships never work out anyway.
So you just broke up? Bran, San Francisco's not that far away.
Yeah, she thought it would be best.
So, what did Dylan and Kelly do this time? I thought you guys were like the Three Musketeers these days.
So did I.
They were all getting along so well.
She is talking about that pretty blond and the other guy, right? It's Kelly and Dylan.
You could at least have their names straight by now.
And you could remember who you're talking to or you might end up doing this presentation in a black hole.
I'm sorry.
There's just a lot at stake here and I've never done this before and it's complicated.
All right, slow down, you're doing fine, just back up a little bit.
Okay, this was a few nights ago.
They got together to talk things over.
I'm sure you're wondering why we both wanted to meet with you.
I thought you wanted to buy me some pie.
Yeah, humble pie.
- My favourite kind.
- Seriously.
I don't know about you, but for me, these past few weeks have been a nightmare.
I mean, we are at each other's throats, we're arguing all the time, - we can't trust one another.
- It hasn't been a picnic.
And that's why I've gotta make a change.
Dylan, we both love you.
We both find you very attractive.
And very sexy.
And appealing.
What exactly are you two suggesting here? This kid has seen too many French movies.
Maybe you've seen too many French movies.
I think we should all stop trying to hide our mutual feelings.
Admit how we all feel and agree to be friends.
- Good friends.
- Platonic friends.
I see.
Dylan, you don't wanna be tied down right now, you've said so yourself.
And we could all use a cooling-off period.
- That way none of us will get hurt.
- And we're all in the same boat.
So, what do you think? I think I love you both.
And I wanna keep it that way.
- Good.
- That was easy.
To friendship.
Wasn't that lovely? Should have known we'd end up with a Disney picture.
To continue.
Their arrangement worked wonderfully at first.
They really gave it the old college High school try.
And they all enjoyed spending time together until that fateful night when Dylan and Kelly came over to trim the tree.
Am I the only one who thinks Shakespeare is boring? Yes.
- Well, the language is so dated.
- How can you say that? I mean, okay, let's say you're at your local mall, somebody's hassling you, you say to them: A pox o' your throat, you bawling, blasphemous, incharitable dog! - Yes.
- Thank you, William Shakespeare.
- Does anybody else want a soda? - Oh, I do.
Yes wench, bring it forth.
Coming right up, my lord.
If it would be possible for you to give me 24 hours, - to think it over.
- Sure.
Sure, sure.
You go on home and talk about it to your wife.
- I'd like to.
- Yeah.
It's A Wonderful Life.
I love this movie.
How can you not? It's an American classic.
It's A Wonderful Life? - Never heard of it.
- Me either.
I don't need 24 hours, I don't have to talk to anybody.
I know right now and the answers no.
No.
Cary Grant is so amazing in this.
Yes, only it's Jimmy Stewart.
In the whole vast configuration of things I'd say you were nothing but a scurvy little spider.
And that goes for you too.
What's that for? It's for nothing.
It's just a friendly gesture.
Friendly? Very friendly.
I take it this is where their arrangement begins to unravel? Not exactly.
- I'm sorry.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
I started it.
Yeah, well, you know it's just, it's a habit.
Yeah, a little backsliding's normal.
It just takes some getting used to.
- Right.
- Because we are just friends, Dylan.
- Right.
- Right.
Yeah.
So the next day, they all went to the Peach Pit.
Donna just couldn't believe we were all being so mature about this thing.
But I just told her, our friendship is really important to us.
Absolutely.
So finish telling me about David.
His mom just decided to move to Portland, Oregon.
Why Portland? Because it's a thousand miles away from his dad, I guess.
I'm gonna go check on him.
Look, Dylan, about last night.
Bren, you don't have to say anything.
We probably should not even mention it again.
Good.
Because it was a one-time deal.
Absolutely.
I just wanna make sure that you know that.
- Well, accidents do happen.
- Right.
Right.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi.
Hey, Dave, I'm sorry about your mom, man.
Oh, that's okay.
It was just kind of sudden.
I got to her house and all my stuff was packed up in boxes.
- That's rough.
- Yeah.
Listen, I don't know if I'm gonna be up to videotaping the trip to Alvarado Street tomorrow.
Don't worry, I'll help you.
And you are going to make a great St.
Nick.
- Brenda.
- Come on, Dylan.
You can be a jolly fat man for a couple of hours without destroying your image.
Donna and I have to go back to school to sign off on the final details for tomorrow and we'd like to put you down as Santa.
Don't do it.
We'll put you down as a maybe.
Do you wanna come with us? No.
I'm going home with Kelly.
I'll call you later.
- And I'll call you later.
- Okay.
Work on him, Kell.
Oh, I plan on it.
So this is where their arrangement hit the skids? Well, no, not exactly.
Dylan, why are you being so stubborn? Oh, Kelly, listen, do you really think that any of those little kids are gonna believe that a slim young guy like me in a red suit is Santa Claus? Well, some of them will.
I mean, when I was 6, I went to the mall to see Santa Claus and I was in heaven and he was Chinese.
I never believed in Santa Claus.
Well, that explains everything.
What can I say? Come on, I bet you'd look really hot in a red suit.
You're being very persistent.
Well, I promised Brenda I'd do whatever it takes.
Whatever it takes? Nothing might have come of it if Brenda hadn't decided to surprise Dylan by bringing the Santa costume over to his house to try it on for size.
- Surprise.
Surprise.
- Exactly.
I know what you're gonna say.
And you can bet it ain't "Ho, ho, ho, merry Christmas," Dylan.
Bren, come on in here, let's talk about it.
So you can have a real ménage à trois? Dream on.
- Brenda, let's talk about this, okay? - There is nothing to talk about.
One picture is worth a thousand words.
Don't go away mad.
- Now why would I be mad? - Bren, it just happened.
Oh, like it just happened with me yesterday? What? Hey, look, I mean, we're all human, all of us, you said that.
What just happened with you yesterday? I don't know about you guys, but it's really cold out here.
Give me that suit.
Oh, no, you brought it over here, I'm trying it on.
Why? So you can sit us on your lap and ask us what we want in our stocking? When yesterday, did this just happen? I'd really like to know.
Look, would you just relax, the both of you, okay? Because nothing happened.
- Okay? Nothing happened.
- That did not look like nothing to me.
You told me to convince him to play Santa.
Oh, Kelly, not by any means necessary.
It was just a friendly little kiss, at first.
Yeah, I know that routine.
He did the same thing to you? Whoa, hey, hold on a minute.
Brenda, you started it, don't try to deny it.
Swell.
Look, just take that thing off.
You look ridiculous.
You know, what is ridiculous is us trying to fool ourselves into thinking - that we could ever be friends.
- You can say that again.
Hey, hey, what do you want from me? Look, you tell me you love me.
You tell me that I'm attractive, you hug me, you kiss me.
What in heaven's name do you expect? Seems to be a question for you, sir.
Don't look at me like that, Miriam.
I can see this is heating up.
- Donna, I need to talk to you.
- What's up? Look, Dylan and Kelly cannot go to the school with us.
Why not? Because we're not speaking to each other, that's why not.
- Again? What happened now? - Nothing happened.
All I know is I worked hard on this project, I should have some say as to who gets to go.
You know that's not the way it works.
Besides, who's gonna be Santa? Fine.
If you think those two are more valuable than me, - just cross my name off the list.
- Brenda.
- Hey, Donna, listen - Dylan.
How'd the Santa suit fit? That's just it, it didn't.
I looked like a stewed tomato.
Oh, I am sure you looked fine.
I don't think I'm going on this little expedition of yours.
Oh, Dylan, please don't say that.
Hey, I'm sorry, we go to a school one day, we play white knight to some underprivileged kids, what kind of difference is that gonna make? Well, I'm sorry you feel that way.
Donna.
Listen, Don, I'm not feeling very good, okay? Kelly, you look fine.
Put me on a bus with Brenda and Dylan and watch me get sick to my stomach.
You don't have to worry about that because Brenda already told me she's not going because you are.
She did? Well, you can just give her a little message for me.
Tell her that she can have the bus to herself, because I won't be on it.
- Kelly.
- Donna.
David, I am so glad to see you.
You cannot believe what is going on.
Everyone is backing out on me.
I'm afraid I'll have to take a pass also.
David, look, I know you're upset about your mom and I understand that.
But you don't have to film it if you don't want to.
The most important thing is you being there.
But if I'm not gonna tape it, there's really no reason for me to be there.
David.
I need you.
Listen, Donna, this is a senior class thing and I'm not a senior.
Let's face it, haven't I been tagging along with you and your friends long enough? Look, I'll see you later.
And I hope everything goes okay.
- Hey, Donna.
- Steve.
Did you get permission to come with us today? No way.
They don't want a juvenile delinquent serving as a role model.
Well, what if you went in disguise? We could smuggle you on the bus and they would never be the wiser.
You mean, red suit, floppy hat, white beard? Yeah, I would if I could, but I'm sorry.
- Yeah.
I gotta go.
- See you.
- Andrea.
Hi.
- Hi, Donna.
- Have you seen Brandon? - No.
Not recently.
Oh, well, I was hoping you could help me talk him into being Santa? I don't think I carry much weight on that score.
In fact, I was gonna tell you I can't go.
Come on, you are the last person I would expect to flake out on me.
Look, I'm not flaking out on you, okay? It's for charity, for heaven's sake.
Look, I happen to do a lot of work with volunteer causes.
I see, so now that you got into Yale you don't really care what goes on your record? That's a nice thing to say.
You're right, I'm sorry.
I am just getting desperate here.
Can you please, please help me out, Andrea? The truth is, I just think Brandon and I need a little time apart, okay? - Brandon and you? - Donna.
You're gonna have to do this without me.
Sorry.
Is someone trying to tell me something here? Donna.
Brandon, I cannot take any more bad news so please don't tell me you're not coming with us.
Okay, so who do I tell? How can you do this to me? I know its last minute, I'm sorry Brandon, please.
You're the only friend I have left.
Donna, the last couple days have been really tough for me, okay? And I'm really not in a festive holiday sort of mood.
I'd just be a downer.
So fake it.
It will not kill you.
Donna.
Get ahold of yourself.
Brandon, the bus is leaving in half an hour.
How come everyone thinks they can drop out at the last minute? I can't speak for anybody else, but Gil Meyers is the faculty sponsor.
He let me off the hook.
Well, Gil Meyers is not in charge of this event.
Oh, yeah? So who is? If you had given us sufficient notice, perhaps your spaces on the bus could have been filled from the long waiting list of students who would've been happy to join us at the Alvarado Street School today.
But at this point, unless you have a note from your doctor saying that you have pneumonia And I wanna see that chest x-ray.
- I expect to see each and every one of your smiling faces on that bus.
And I mean immediately.
If not sooner.
Move.
So now that I've brought you up to date - Not.
- Excuse me? This Brandon and Andrea situation, I don't understand.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You see, you were so interested in that Kelly-Dylan-Brenda affair, I left out a whole section.
Last night, after Nikki dropped her bombshell, Brandon went over to the Peach Pit.
What is it with me, Nat? Every time I get involved with a woman, it just falls apart.
I must have bad relationship karma or something.
Oh, come on, Brandon, girls throw themselves at you all the time.
Another one will come along soon enough.
- Hi, Nat.
- Andrea.
- How are you? - Andrea.
- I'll bag your order in a minute.
- Thanks.
Brandon, where's Nikki? We had a little change in plans.
I'm on my own tonight.
Hey, you still wanna catch a flick tonight? I'd love to, I have to baby-sit.
That's too bad.
You can keep me company if you want.
Nice house, big-screen TV.
Sure, what the hell.
Hey, watch your mouth, kid.
Heck, I mean, what the heck.
Maxine's asleep.
Right on schedule.
I'm serious! We must be good! I love this movie.
Yeah, me too.
I just saw it last night.
- Well, we can watch something else.
- No.
That's fine.
I could watch this movie a hundred times, it'd still get to me.
This is a present from a very dear friend of mine.
Look, Daddy, teacher says, every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings.
That's right.
That's right.
Attaboy, Clarence.
- I needed a good cry.
- Yeah, me too.
You know, that's what I love about you.
You're just a sentimentalist at heart.
And what else do you love about me? You know, I don't know what my life would've been like if you guys hadn't moved here.
Well, you'd be editor of the paper and you'd be going to Yale.
Yes, but would I have been happy? Or would I have just been some social outcast with calluses on the brain? That's entirely possible.
You know, when I was dating Jay, I couldn't help but remember that day last summer when I just started seeing him and you were trying to convince me to stay at the Beach Club.
- Yeah.
- You were expressing your feelings.
Yes, and I can still recall the sting of your response.
Well, you know what they say, timing is everything.
I can't believe you.
- What? What'd I do? - You were thinking of Nikki.
- You don't think I knew that.
- You were thinking about Jay.
- Oh, so now we're even? - No, that doesn't make us even because I never even liked Jay.
In fact, I'm not only insulted, I'm disgusted.
- Why did you stop it? - Well, from there on it gets ugly.
So now that you've gotten all the background.
Yeah, I see the dilemma.
They got sidetracked with their personal problems.
No, excuse me, but you don't know the real danger.
Their bus is on a collision course with a truck.
I fixed that already.
I got that truck rerouted.
But I didn't even tell you about it yet.
I took the liberty of skipping ahead a few pages.
- But how did you fix it? - It wasn't easy.
It's a complicated move and you can only use it one time per catastrophe.
Craig Clemons is on the 405 to Long Beach as we speak.
Craig Clemons? Who cares about Craig Clemons? Greg Clemons is the guy driving that other truck.
- Which other truck? - That other truck.
Oh, so this guy, Greg Clemons, is still On the road to eternity.
And so are those kids.
- Gil.
- Steve.
Welcome to the Alvarado Street Elementary School.
What's the matter? Bus ain't good enough for you? Hey, Mrs.
Teasley's not around, is she? Oh, yeah.
Aren't you violating some West Beverly penal code by being here? Big time, but I was hoping the spirit of charity would move Mrs.
Teasley and she'd let me stay.
What the heck, she can't give me any more detention than she already has.
- Are you from the high school? - Are you? Yeah, are you? I'm from the high school.
They'll be here in a while with lots of presents.
Shouldn't they be here by now? I mean, I raced over from my teachers' meeting.
I guess.
I don't know.
They must have left late.
What's up, man? Can't you make the truck stop or turn left or something? Hey, I'm good, but I'm not a miracle worker.
Well, then don't you think it's time to call upstairs? - Absolutely not.
- Well, why? You don't want any of them to know how badly you botched this up? Don't blame me.
It's their own fault the bus left late.
Oh, Clarence.
Look at that guy.
We have to do something.
I'm sorry, Miriam.
I know how badly you want your wings, but I'm afraid we'll have to let destiny run its course.
Are those people ever gonna quit singing? I happen to like the singing.
You would.
Why are you always picking on her? Why don't you stay out of it? There's such a thing as over rehearsing, Kelly.
- Yes, and you are the music critic.
- He's allowed to have an opinion.
If he doesn't have one, he can get one from you.
Hey, relax, will you? Who died and left you boss? While I sing of Yuletide treasure So you guys mellowed out back here? This is not gonna work out.
Donna, we tried to warn you.
Yeah, this group is not cut out to be the ambassadors of good will.
So the only thing you can agree on is that you don't wanna be here? That's just great.
So, what do you propose to do, stay on the bus and sulk? None of us wanted to be on this bus, remember? How could I forget? Look, we will pass out the presents.
That doesn't mean we have to enjoy it.
Yeah and I'm not gonna wear a red suit.
You know what, you guys? That is not good enough.
If there's one day out of the whole year to stop thinking about ourselves, then this is it.
And regardless of who gets to wear the red suit, this is the time to be jolly and loving and generous.
Not cynical and moody and petty.
And if you guys can't stop and appreciate all the positive things you have in your life and just how lucky that you are to be here, then you might as well get off the bus right now.
Way to go, Donna.
Not a bad idea there, kids.
You could get off the bus anytime now.
So how did Donna get so profound all of a sudden? Anybody? Well, I think Christmas brings out the best in her.
And the worst in us.
Not necessarily.
You never really liked Jay, huh? No, I guess I was jealous.
And I guess I was jealous of Nikki, Brooke and Emily, right? Yeah, I got the picture.
You know, we could put aside our differences for one afternoon.
Or maybe even through the weekend.
Or we could be really big about it and go for New Year's.
Donna, I brought my camera so if the Madrigals want to sing another chorus, I can tape it.
She was too persuasive for her own good.
I can't bear to watch.
Here we go, Simon says, put your hands on your elbow.
Simon says, put your hands down.
Simon says, hop on one foot.
Hop on the other foot.
You all made it.
- How we doing over here? - I don't know.
Simon says, stop jumping.
Wait, I think I see them.
Well, it's about time.
Yeah, that's them.
Tis the season to be jolly - Oh, dear.
- Better not look, Miriam.
Just close your eyes and it'll be over in a minute.
Hey, this truck's going the wrong way on a one-way street.
Hey.
You're going the wrong way.
You're going the wrong way.
Stop! Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one.
- How did you do that? - I didn't.
- You mean it was - A higher power.
- Well, we sure are glad you made it.
- Yeah, we almost bailed, man.
Somebody up there must really like you.
No, the one we ought to thank is right over there.
Whoa.
Hey, slow down, man, you're gonna hit your head on the jungle gym.
You'll get a big hematoma, I had one when I was your age.
- Hi, Mrs.
Teasley.
- Steven.
This is Dylan's department.
Here, now, it's very easy.
It's all in the wrist, okay? Oh, my Lord.
Good job.
- She's like a pro.
- You probably knew that.
You know, Donna, if I load up on required courses, like I'd planned on doing last summer, I could finish early and graduate with your class.
That's great.
But when will we ever get to see each other? When we graduate.
You girls never decorated my cookies that good.
Dylan, Kelly and I have been talking.
Always a dangerous trend.
You see, this Three Musketeers thing was a bad idea.
- So we've decided on a new plan.
- Wait, you've decided? Yep, you can't have your cookie and eat it too.
So you've got to decide which of us you wanna be with on New Year's Eve.
Or else.
Now, if you'll excuse us, we have to go tell Santa what we want for Christmas.
Goodbye.
Did you hear that? You know, they say every time a bell rings, it means an angel is getting her wings.
Oh, how cute.
Oh, Clarence, are these wings for me? You did good, Miriam.
Thank you, Clarence.
Don't thank me.
Thank you know who.