Star vs. the Forces of Evil (2015) s03e16 Episode Script

1 [" I'm from Another Dimension" by Brad Breeck plays.]
It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension Gonna get a little weird Gonna have a good time I ain't from 'round here I'm from another woo-hoo Yeh-heah I'm talking rainbows I'm talking puppies Pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa, pa Paaa It's gonna get a little weird Gonna get a little wild I ain't from 'round here I'm from another dimension [gavel bangs.]
All rise! The court of the Magical High Commission is now in session.
Her Majesty, Queen Moon of Mewni, presiding.
Thank you.
We are gathered here today for the trial of Eclipsa I'm sorry! I-I'm sorry I'm late! [panting.]
We haven't had a trial in so long, I didn't know where to find the typey thingy.
Usually Rhombulus just crystallizes everybody.
[chuckles.]
With his laser eye.
But a real trial! This is exciting! That depends on where you're sitting.
As I was saying [keys clacking.]
we're gather here today for the trial of Eclipsa [clacking stops.]
[growls.]
[soft clacking.]
We shall determine once and for all whether Eclipsa has committed the evil deeds recorded in our histories.
If she is found guilty, the punishment will be Death! Death! Rhombulus, we talked about this.
Well, we crystallized her last time.
Look how that turned out! Death! - Hey! Sit down.
- Yes, ma'am.
Well, that's all in order.
But what is she doing here? This is supposed to be a private hearing! Star was the one who convinced me to hold this trial in the first place.
If Eclipsa is found guilty, I want her to be here to see it.
Or if she's innocent, which she is, I wanna see all y'all's faces when you realize how wrong you were.
If you think you can just waltz in here - I can waltz wherever I want! - [growls.]
No! [all chattering angrily.]
Excuse me! Hey, sorry, but could you talk a bit slower, please? [whispers angrily.]
No.
Queen Moon, what evidence have you brought us? I'm afraid this is the evidence.
It's less impressive than it looks.
These are all secondhand accounts, oral histories, folk stories, none of them verified.
There's no way around it.
Come on, everybody grab a stack.
You guys aren't gonna seriously sit here - and read all of that? - Yes, I don't mean to fuss, but exactly how long is this trial meant to last? [sighs.]
As long as it takes.
Now to begin, we must organize each and every one of these documents by date and author.
[groans.]
Sounds like math! Once we've constructed a rough timeline, we can Uh.
That won't be necessary.
- I request a trial by Box.
- Awesome! Well, it looks like I won't be needing these anymore.
Sean, cancel my lunch order.
We're gonna be done here pretty quick.
- Lunch? - Eclipsa, are you sure about this? The Box is a ruthless seeker of truth.
If you attempt to conceal anything from it, crystallization may be the least of your worries.
I'm tired of sitting around waiting for you to decide my fate.
I'll give you the truth, all of it, and if that means crystallization, so be it.
Sean, we wish to invoke trial by Box.
Yes, Your Majesty.
[music.]
The Box of Truth has arrived! - Wait, is that Truth or Punishment? - What? No, no, no, no.
This is the Box of Truth.
That, my friend, is Truth or Punishment.
We played it at my sleepover.
You played it? The Box is not a game! [intense male voice.]
Who do you have a crush on? [stammers.]
Queen Moon! Oh-oh.
[sighs.]
It must be on the wrong setting.
We need to talk.
All right, ladies, are you Prepare for judgment! The rules are simple.
Each member of the Magical High Commission shall ask one question, and the accused must answer.
[whirring.]
To all who seek the path of knowledge, [music.]
listen well to this decree.
Surrender to the eye of justice.
Swear an oath of Truth to me.
Ooh.
Different poem.
Different poem.
- I swear.
- I swear.
- I swear.
- I, uh swear? [hisses.]
I swear.
And now, it's time for trial by Box.
Eclipsa, did you write the evil chapter in the book of spells? Exhibit A! Yes, I did, but, for the record, I never called it the Evil Chapter.
That was your people's name for it.
I wrote plenty of eviler spells that never even made it into the final draft.
Writing is rewriting, you know.
Truth! [scoffs.]
Whatever.
Have you guys even read her chapter? Hekapoo, the second question goes to you.
Box, pull up the royal archives for me, would ya? Exhibit B.
Did you abandon your husband, King Shastakan, and your kingdom to elope with a monster? Oh, hello, sweetie.
Yes, I did run off with a monster.
But could you really blame me? How could I resist a smile like that? Truth again! Aww! Huh? - Uh-huh.
- Come on, Eclipsa.
- Rhombulus, the third - Did you eat those babies?! What? Ugh! Bobipsa was the baby-eater, not Eclipsa! Oh, right.
I wanna take my question back.
There are no take-backs in trial by Box! [babies crying.]
Well, I hate to disappoint you, but I'm afraid I have not eaten even a single baby.
Now, I did hurt the occasional teenager, but only psychologically, and they always deserved it.
We're on a roll here, people! What is wrong didn't you hear her? - She didn't eat those babies! - Star, sit down.
We must respect the rules of the Box.
Fine! Eclipsa are you sorry for what you've done? No, I'm not.
- What?! - The nerve! Outrageous! That settles it.
Rhombulus, if you would.
- Right.
- One moment.
I haven't asked my question.
Wait.
What? [laughs.]
She can't ask us a question.
Um [singsong.]
I think she can! Right, mom? My mom said! She said in the rules! Technically since Eclipsa was once a queen of Mewni, she is still a member of the Magical High Commission, and every member gets to ask one question.
[clears throat.]
What did you do with my daughter? [all gasp.]
Uh, I have no idea what she's talking about.
We didn't do anything with your daughter! And honestly? I-I'm kind of offended.
Too bad for you.
[bellowing.]
Everyone lied!! [gasps.]
[yelps.]
What's happening? We told the truth! [Box.]
Are you sure about that? [all gasp.]
Uh, c'mon, guys, spit it out! [music.]
We didn't do anything wrong! - The Box seems to differ! - We aren't the ones on trial! If you'd rather get to the truth more quickly, I can work with that.
[rumbling.]
[all gasp.]
- That's not good.
- Guys! [grunts.]
My magic's no good in here! [grunts.]
[grunting.]
Moon, please shut it off! I can't do that.
We all took the oath! Oh, no.
Okay, I'm done! I want out! We're gonna be crushed! You know, this is so unfair! You enforce the laws of magic on everyone around you.
And yet for some reason, you can lie to us? How does that make you any different than the villain you say Eclipsa is? We got rid of your daughter, sorry! Truth! [groans.]
What the heck, Rhombulus?! I'm sorry, I'm tired of keeping it a secret.
- Tell 'em Omni.
- [sighs.]
Fine.
Eclipsa, your ex-husband, King Shastakan, he wanted nothing to do with your half-monster daughter.
So we swapped her out with a peasant girl.
We gave her the Royal Magic Wand, and she became the next Queen of Mewni.
Eclipsa has been found guilty of crimes against Mewmanity.
However, the Magical High Commission has also been found guilty of tampering with Mewni's history and omitting the truth from the Butterfly family for generations.
This concludes the trial.
Although if we're all being honest here, it seems like y'all still have some issues to deal with.
So it was just as we suspected.
[both.]
What?! Uh, Moon? We knew there was something missing from our family's history.
Eclipsa's daughter should be recorded here in the royal archives, but she's gone.
[gasps.]
Wait a minute.
This whole trial was a set-up?! [panicked whimpering.]
You were planning this all along! Actually, we all planned this.
[panicked whimpering.]
We thought you might be hiding something.
And it turns out we were right.
You lied to our family for generations.
[carriage-return bell dinging.]
- We had to.
- Can you imagine if the power of Magic - fell into the hands of a monster? - You let us live a lie.
We shouldn't even have the throne.
Eclipsa isn't even wait.
You aren't actually my great-great-great- - great-something-grandma.
- No, sweetie, I'm not.
Then that means we're no more royal than anybody else.
You're still a princess, Star.
No, Mom.
We're nobody.
[music.]
Star! Star, wait! [music.]
[panting.]
Okay, Trot-Fudge Sundae! You got this! [wails.]
[both panting.]
Here you go.
[grumbles, grunts.]
[grumbles.]
Junk junk junk [music.]
Mm, what's in here? Ugh! The worst junk.
When will they stop sending us that garbage? Huh, Ludo shirt, Ludo mask, Ludo mask, Ludo mask, Ludo mask.
[groans.]
[gasps.]
Dimensional scissors? [music.]
All right, Ludo, where are you? Oh! Blue! Let's see, what's blue? Please don't be the cat-face dimension.
Wait, green? Okay, green.
No, pink.
Okay, that's Blue again? What's going on? Uh-oh.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
[coughing.]
Dennis! What's going on up here? - Nothing.
- Well, that nothing interrupted me and my stickers! [inhales.]
Mmm.
Good old scratch n' sniff.
What's this? [groaning.]
Honey! He's doing it again! Dennis, do you know what a deadbeat is? It's you! That's what you're gonna be if you keep acting like your brother, collecting all this garbage, destroying property, acting like you're too good for us! Oh! Are we berating Dennis? It's not even dinnertime! He's hoarding Ludo stuff again.
Dennis, how could you? Ludo betrayed us.
He and his goons took over the castle.
- He was the worst.
- You're the worst.
- You got something to say? - No.
- No what? - No, sir.
That's what I thought.
Now clean up this mess and come help me and your mother with our stickers.
And mind your nails.
We need those fresh young fingers.
[music.]
[sighs.]
No, you guys, you need to get back in the closet.
My dad catches you out her here's gonna freak.
Spider, these things are useless unless I know where he is.
What? Y-You just want me to Okay.
Be my guest.
[squawks softly.]
I-I told you they don't work if you don't know where he is.
[sighs.]
Okay.
[music.]
[squeals.]
[groans.]
Come on! Stay awake! What is it? [gasps.]
You found him! Let's get my brother.
[yelps.]
[grunts.]
Our house? Made of garbage.
[whistling tune, water running.]
Ludo? Wha-a-a-t?! Spider! [laughs.]
That's you! Oh, my friend! Brother, it's me, Dennis.
Dennis? How long has it been? Last time I saw you, you were this tall, and now you're exactly as tall as I am! - What are you doing here? - I came to bring you home.
Dennis, this is my home.
Come inside.
I just cleaned up.
I can't have you come into the house.
You'll make a mess.
Look, papa hasn't forgotten about you.
Ooh, been saving up a stash for my best girl! [laughs.]
Bon appétit! Come sit.
Let me take care of this for you.
But that's your helmet from when you ruled the Monster Army.
And now it's ruling the garbage.
That was a piece of your legacy.
I'm done with that part of my life.
Now how about a drink, you? Nothing too fizzy, of course.
Make yourself comfortable.
Could you ask mother and father if they'd like a beverage? Uh, mother and father? Dennis, do you want crushed ice or regular? [humming happily.]
Oh, thank you, Mother, I do make the best sodas, don't I? Thanks, yeah look, Ludo? You gotta come home.
Mom and Dad are driving me nuts.
But you can't say that in front of them, Dennis.
Okay, fine, Ludo, let's just go talk in the kitchen, then.
Look, I really, really need you to come home.
- I am home.
- No, Ludo, I'm at my wits' end.
The yelling, the berating, the stupid scratch n' sniff stickers.
All they do is push me around and talk trash about you! What are you talking about, Dennis? Mother and Father love us! They're so happy you're here! We're even going to play cha-rahds after dinner! They always let me win! [giggles.]
- What are you talking about - Just kidding! I'm just really good at cha-rahds.
Now stop worrying.
That's not the Dennis I barely remember.
Make that frowny turn upside-downy! - Okay.
But after dinner - And cha-rahds.
And after cha-rahds we're leaving, okay? Yes, Dennis, whatever you say.
There we go, all tucked in! What's that? Oh, yes, how could I forget? Good night, my darling.
They're finally asleep.
What angels! Awesome, cool.
Now let's go.
Go? Dennis, I can't just go.
- Ludo - Shh! We don't need to whisper! There's no one who can hear us! Now come on! This is ridiculous.
I'm gonna lose my mind.
Ooh! What the Mother! [laughs.]
Father! - What are you doing up? - What are you doing? Cha-rahds? At this hour? Mmm, well, you twisted my arm! I'll do it! [giggles.]
This whole thing is a cha-rahd! [grunts.]
Charade! Just one more round, Dennis! Let's humor them.
Come on, what do you say? Okay, let's get out of - Where did - I don't know.
[groans.]
You know what? Never mind.
The sooner we leave, the better.
But mother and father want us to stay.
[groans.]
No, forget it! Wow they really wanna play cha-rahds.
Once they get going! [laughs.]
Stop! This isn't funny! These aren't our parents.
This is actual garbage.
Oh, no! Mother! We can fix this.
We can fix this.
We can fix this.
It's fine, we can fix this.
We can fix this.
- We can fix this.
- You're losing it.
[deep.]
Calling his own mother and father garbage?! How about I teach you to apologize?! [high-pitched.]
Watch his fingers, dear.
You watch your fingers.
[deep.]
What did you say? I said you watch your fingers! Sir! Dennis! [growls.]
[deep.]
This is what we get! [high-pitched.]
For raising brats like your and your brother.
[roars.]
[deep.]
Oh, but you're a big man now who thinks he and his brother are too good for this family! Yes, I do! Raaah! Look at you, you're just like your awful brother.
Good.
Because he's my hero! [roars in slow motion.]
Dennis! You stood up for me! No one has ever stood up for me.
Of course.
I love you, big brother.
Oh, I lo lub oh, how to l-o-o ove? Lo-o-ve yo u-u? Tu [slurred.]
I love you, too.
Let's get out of here.
We can face the real mom and dad now.
I can't.
Something very important happened today.
But I have lots more I need to work through - before I can leave.
- Well, I'm here to help.
You're not alone anymore, big brother.
I know that now.
But I have to do this part on my own.
But you're my hero.
No one else in the family was brave enough to leave.
I can't stand up to them on my own.
Dennis, you just did.
Did you see that dunk? You can jump higher than they could ever reach.
You need to go find your own adventures.
You're going to be just fine, kiddo.
Take good care of Spider.
She's quiet, but she's a smart lady.
And I'll take care of Bird, too.
I don't know who that is.
Goodbye.
Hello, Star and Marco.
How about a game of cha-rahds? # She's a princess winning battles # Through the break of dawn Don't worry when it's night 'Cause she would keep the lights on Oh, there goes a shining star - # Evil won't deter her # - Yes, sir! - # 'Cause magic flows through her # - Star Butterfly! She is a shining star