Buffy the Vampire Slayer s03e17 Episode Script

Previously on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer": - I'm Faith.
|- I'd say there's a new slayer in town.
If violence upsets you,|you're in the wrong line of work.
Or maybe you like it a little too much.
Faith, no! - You killed a man.
|- I don't care.
- She's unstable, Buffy.
|- I guess that means you have a job opening.
Well - Well|- That was very artistic.
Yeah.
It wasn't what I expected.
|I've never actually seen Well, from the title,|I thought it was about food.
Well, there was food.
Right.
The scene with the food.
So feel like getting some hot chocolate? Or some cold shower? I'm sorry.
I wanted to|take you out somewhere fun.
It's been a long time since I've been|to the movies.
They've changed.
A little scary.
And a little not, which is also scary.
I'm sorry.
I just don't like|getting you worked up like that.
We can't actually do any of those things.
You'd lose your soul, and besides,|I don't even own a kimono.
Buffy, you don't have to worry about me.
I just don't like to rub your nose in it.
I suddenly wonder where|that expression comes from.
I don't need to see movies to get worked up.
|Just being around you does that just fine.
It doesn't mean I'm gonna lose control,|that I'm gonna be frustrated around you.
It feels nice just to feel.
It doesn't drive you crazy when we're close? Watch this.
You see? Safe as houses.
Check out the lust bunnies.
Patrol? - The Council has you back on active duty?|- Finally.
They want us down by Mercer.
OK.
Good night.
- I'll see you soon.
|- Don't worry, big guy.
Just keepin' her warm for you.
Gotta tell you, B.
The willpower thing? - Nice job.
|- Thanks.
- What?|- The "close, but no cigar" deal with Angel.
I don't know if I could handle, you know,|the way you're not handling it.
Faith, when it comes|to Angel, do me a favour.
Duck! What are you, nuts?|Goin' around punchin' people? - People?|- So what? I'm a demon.
That makes it OK? Hold it! Stake me now,|and you never find out what I got for you.
Think about it.
|"Demon seeks slayers.
" Highly unusual? Talk fast.
How'd you like to get your hands|on the Books of Ascension? - Never heard of them.
|- Books of Ascension, Very powerful works.
And I'm not talkin' about the prose.
|They deal with some dark stuff.
And the Mayor would hate it if somebody|got a hold of them before he - Well, you know.
|- Don't know.
Before he what? Hey, read 'em and weep.
|That's all I got to say.
Tomorrow I get the books.
Meet me here.
|If the price is right, I give the books to you.
- Not really looking to trade with a demon.
|- In a barter economy, that'd be a problem.
I want cash, princess.
|Five large for the whole set.
So you can buy - I'm guessing here -|some skincare products? Plane ticket out of the Hellmouth|before it's "Adios, Slayer Loco.
" So, five Gs.
What do you say? I think "Die, fiend" sums it up.
Let him go.
I don't think he falls into|the "deadly threat to humanity" category.
A demon's a demon.
I'd like to know more about|these Books of Ascension, Anything that would|pin the Mayor down would be great.
Yeah.
It'd be great.
And what exactly did this demon look like? Demonic.
And you say he has|the Books of Ascension, or will soon, and he was, what, willing to sell them? That's what I said.
You know what I wish?|I wish you'd pull your hair back.
I know.
Fashion isn't exactly my "thing".
But gosh darn it, you know,|you've got such a nice face.
I can't understand why you hide it.
Yeah.
Sure.
Whatever.
It's just a matter of time|before this demon guy's gonna spill.
- Buffy and the Superfriends are gonna|- You worry too much.
That's unnecessary stress.
|Luckily, I've got just the thing.
There you go.
Now, first|you load up on calcium, then find this demon, kill the heck|out of him, and bring the books to me.
- And if Buffy gets to him first?|- Well, frankly, I don't like to think about that.
I like good, positive, "up" thoughts.
If you failed me in that way Well, you know, replacing|Mr Trick was chore enough.
Come on, don't worry.
Drink up.
There's nothing uncool|about healthy teeth and bones.
And you say this demon wanted cash? - That's very unusual.
|- Demons after money.
What happened to the still beating heart|of a virgin? No one has standards any more.
- He said the books were worth the price.
|- What's this Ascension mean? - I'm not sure.
|- Not really a common term in demonology.
The Merenshtadt Text, I think in the section on genocide|they mention Ascension.
- We have a winner.
|- And, more importantly, two losers.
- Where did you find that?|- In the top of your cabinet, with the stuff you try to keep hidden.
Hidden? Are there any engravings|I should know about? Frolicking nymphs of some kind? No, just magic secrets|Giles doesn't think I'm ready for.
Yes.
Here we are.
There's a reference here|to the journal of Desmond Kane, pastor of a town called Sharpsville.
"May 26, 1723.
" "Tomorrow is the Ascension.
|God help us all.
" - That was the last anyone heard.
|- Of Kane? Of Sharpsville.
The town|more or less disappeared.
So, Ascension possibly not a love-in.
- I think you should meet with this demon.
|- Yeah? Anybody got $5,000? I have something important to ask you.
Important? Let's start|calculating those odds, people.
What are you doing Friday night? As always, my sacred duty|as a watcher prevents me from - Why?|- I have a paper to write, for English.
And you're English, so I thought What? Is it so wrong to be|getting an insider's perspective? I study best in a good restaurant,|around eightish? Think it over? On the day the words "flimsy excuse" were|redefined, we stood in awe and watched.
Right.
Books of Ascension, Mayor.
Slaughter.
Tell you what.
Why don't we try to find|this demon sooner rather than later, perhaps persuade him to lend us|the books free of charge? I think Faith might be useful|in that "persuasion" part.
I imagine so.
Where is Faith, anyway? Hey! Slayer.
You know,|I wasn't expecting company.
Give me a minute,|and I'll have the place tidied up.
- You got the books?|- Well, that depends.
You got my money? You're tough in negotiations,|and I respect that.
Check 'em out.
|Now, that is quality merchandise.
- Worth five grand, easy.
|- Books of Ascension, Original editions and everything.
|Great condition.
OK, it's a little worn on one spine,|some slight foxing, but otherwise perfect.
Now, the five grand.
|It's, you know, negotiable.
I don't like to haggle.
Faith.
Angel I got nowhere else to go.
Look, I hate asking for help, but I'm asking cos I'm in trouble, like, the real bad kind.
It's OK.
No, it's a couple of county lines|over from OK, believe me.
I believe you.
Look, just talk.
Come on.
Start from the beginning.
Mind if I skip past the "Mom never loved me"|part and get right to it? - I'm scared of myself.
|- I know the feeling.
That's why I came to you.
|I don't want to get all 12-steppy, but remember when you told me killing people|would make me feel like some kind of god? I think I just came down to earth.
|It's not human, if that's what you're thinking.
Not that that makes me feel any better,|or this guy any less dead.
Faith, you need help.
You can't do this alone.
I know.
For real now, I'm scared.
Scared of what I am, what I'm turning into.
A cold-blooded straight-up killer.
Like you.
Not like me.
I didn't have a choice.
But you do.
Look, you can stop this.
Believe me, I don't want to end up|the way everyone said I would.
- Dead, or alone or a loser.
|- You don't have to.
I don't know.
Maybe it's too late for me.
It's not.
Angel, I'm so scared.
It's all right.
It's OK.
Faith.
I Look, I can be here for you,|but not like that, all right? - I'm with Buffy.
|- Buffy.
Yeah.
I didn't mean it like that.
Maybe I did but I wouldn't press it.
You love her, don't you? - I love her.
|- Good for you.
The two of you.
You're lucky.
Are we friends? - We're friends.
|- Then I'm lucky too.
I better go.
Where? I need to cool down, spend some time alone.
Don't worry about me.
|You've been a big help.
Just knowing somebody cares.
Hey, I know I shouldn't be asking this, but|do you think if things were different that things between|you and me'd be different too? - We'll never know.
|- Right.
- How could we?|- Take care of yourself.
Lifetime of practice.
- It's not like I wasn't trying, OK?|- Hey, I'm sure you gave it your level best.
I don't understand what he could be thinking.
Try "Buffy Summers".
|Like in a big, fat, one-track way.
Hey, come on.
Don't be discouraged.
You're a bright, energetic girl with a whole|life ahead of her.
I won't tolerate brooding.
So you couldn't give him|a moment of happiness.
I was thinking more of a long weekend.
And he spurned your advances.
So be it.
|There's more than one way to skin a cat.
And I happen to know that's factually true.
We wanna take Angel's soul away.
|If we can't do it by giving him happiness, well, by golly, we'll just have to do it|in the most painful way imaginable.
Find anything? A six-course banquet of nothing with|a scoop of sod all as a palate cleanser.
I've had no better luck.
There must be something|about this Ascension somewhere.
- Perhaps I should contact the Council|- No.
I don't It should be I that The Council isn't entirely aware|that I'm letting you work for me.
With me.
I don't think they'd be very happy at the idea.
I wasn't about to burst into glorious song|about it myself.
Why don't you call them? I think the most expedient plan would be|to find these Books of Ascension, Buffy, you and Faith must find this demon.
- And soon.
|- Well, I'll go back to the scene, see if I can track him.
Wait for Faith.
That could be hours.
|The girl makes Godot look punctual.
I'll just go myself.
Buffy, this is a job for the both of you.
|This demon could be anywhere.
If these books are as important as he says,|he has good reason to hide.
- Finding him will be extremely difficult.
|- Found your demon.
Fashion tip, Wes? Mouth looks better closed.
I got the address.
I beat it|out of Willy the Snitch personally.
- You beat up Willy.
|- Sure.
Well, actually, let's say|I applied some pressure.
Or more accurately,|that I asked politely, and then - OK, I bribed him.
|- How much? - Did you get a receipt?|- Damn.
I know this.
It's down by the bus station.
- Not the nicest part of town.
|- Again, see? No standards.
I mean, any self-respecting demon should be|living in a pit of filth or a nice crypt.
I'll remember to mention that.
Mention what?|Where are we going, girlfriend? - Actually I can handle this one solo.
|- Why should you get to have all the fun? Share, share, that's fair, right? Right.
We found our demon.
Well, let's go look him up.
Is it me, or did it just get really cold in here? - Faith, careful.
|- Right.
- Missed you last night.
|- Yeah.
I was patrolling.
No shortage of scum|you gotta watch in Sunnydale, right? So I've heard.
- Looks like somebody got here first.
|- I'm bettin' they got the books, too.
Some hit.
This wasn't just a hit.
|This is somebody's idea of a party.
Maybe the guy put up a fight.
We gotta get goin'.
Come on.
|Nothin' we can do here now.
You coming? Mint? Didn't think so.
Well, scheduling a man of your talents|is quite the chore, I'll tell you.
Between the chanting and the sacrifice|My golf game is shot.
But here you are.
You know why I've summoned you.
Can you do it? Need anything from me?|You're not much of a people person, are you? You have risked great danger|in calling on me.
The deadliest Magicks are needed|to rob this creature of its soul.
- Big job, all right.
|- And so it shall be done.
That's just swell.
Listen, are you sure|you don't want any? They're low calorie.
OK.
Are you OK? You seem a little on edge.
Is there anything that's wrong? It's nothing.
It's nothing.
All right, all right.
Stop with the third degree.
- It's Faith.
|- What about her? I went to Angel's last night|and Faith was there.
They looked sort of intimate.
No way.
I know what|you're thinking, and no way.
You're right.
Faith would never do that.
Faith would totally do that.
Faith was built to do that.
|She's the "Do That Girl".
- Comfort.
Remember, comfort?|- I mean, please.
Does Angel come up to|Faith's standards for a guy? - Let's see, is he breathing?|- Actually, no.
But Buffy, Angel.
There's no way he would ever do that.
I mean, you're the only thing|in the world to him.
Sometimes I wonder.
Angel and Faith have a lot in common.
And there's so much he doesn't tell me.
But it's so clear.
The way he feels about you? Buffy, I too know the love of a taciturn man,|and you have to look at their actions.
- I was.
|- Well, what did he say? Say? You mean when I straightforwardly|asked him what was going on? - So you bailed?|- I couldn't.
I mean not there.
Enough.
Stop with the crazy.
Go talk to Angel.
- But I just|- No.
Go.
I give you leave to go.
Thank you.
- Faith.
|- Hey.
- Sorry to bust in uninvited.
|- What do you want? Look, I'm not so good at apologies.
Mostly cos I think the world's out to|screw me, so I'm more owed than owing.
But I've been thinking about last night,|and I want you to know I'm really sorry.
- It's all right.
|- No, it's not all right.
Yeah, I was freaked.
I needed somebody.
But you're with Buffy.
I should know better.
OK.
- You don't trust me.
|- It's not that.
Hey, no problem.
Join the club.
Look, Faith Look, I know what you're goin'|through, all right? And how hard it can be.
It's important that you have|somebody who's been there, OK? Who understands what you're goin' through.
I wanna trust you.
Chump.
Faith! I wanted to do this|the old-fashioned way, but your loss.
- I got tricks Buffy don't know.
|- You don't have to do this.
I know.
But it's fun.
|Now relax.
It'll all be over soon.
Thanks so much.
It's good to have the taste|of a slayer back in my mouth.
It's like cigarettes, you know?|Just when I thought I'd quit.
No, really.
Don't get up.
It's good to be back in Sunnydale.
Nice climate, plenty to eat,|no tortured humanity to hold me down.
But you know what bothers me? You don't seem to be gettin'|the big picture here.
Now, I don't know why you turned me.
|But let me tell you, I'm just glad you did.
- I got my reasons.
|- Let me guess.
You summoned back the true Angelus|because you need a new boy toy? I'm sorry.
Doesn't work that way.
- You wanna be smart? You listen to me.
|- Funny thing about vampires, Faith.
We don't establish|meaningful dialogue with slayers.
Not how Buffy tells it.
- I should have known you'd like it on top.
|- You wanna listen or do you wanna die? As long as you're there, I mostly|want you to wriggle.
But I'm listening.
Last time you got like this,|Buffy kicked your ass back to Hell.
- Do you wanna do better this time?|- Still listening.
Good boy.
Now, you play nice and call truce, and I'll|hook you up with the real power in this town.
- Interested?|- Very.
Then get ready to meet the new boss.
Our enemy has us at a disadvantage.
We|seem consistently to be one step behind him.
Now he has the Books of Ascension,|we must take definitive action.
You have the greatest voice.
Have you|ever thought about doing books on tape? - Way to focus, CC.
|- Yes, let's Let's try to stay on track.
|We need everyone working together here.
- Where's Angel?|- I don't know.
I went to the mansion, but he wasn't there.
- And Faith?|- She's missing, too.
Which means nothing.
|Two unconnected events.
- What shall we do?|- Try to retrieve the Books of Ascension, Check out the Mayor's office, but be|damned careful.
Do not confront the Mayor.
I'll go home and stock up on weapons, slip into something|a little more break-and-enterish.
Right.
Willow, how far|did you get with the Mayor's files? Excuse me.
I believe|Wesley is running this meeting.
It's quite all right.
- Willow?|- It's all bad news.
By the time I got through the encryptions,|the files were empty.
- I guess he saw me coming.
|- What about the Hall of Records? - Go to the source.
|- Good idea.
- There must be information there.
|- Why not take the group and start looking? - Right.
|- I'm in Wesley's group.
- There is just the one group.
|- Yes.
And I'm in it.
Anyone mind if I skip the trip? I'm gonna|cruise town, keep my ear to the ground.
- And I think five's a crowd.
|- It really is.
- I'll drive.
|- They liked your plan.
If anyone finds anything, check in with me.
Be careful.
So, can I keep him? Let's just take things step by step.
|Now then, Angelus.
May I call you Angel? Well, actually, I'm thinking more|along the lines of you calling me "Master".
You know, Angelus, attitude may get you|attention, but courtesy wins respect.
I am the one responsible|for your new attitude.
That's why I'm here.
No trouble with the transition?|No side effects? Had a soul, now I'm free.
That's terrific.
Poetic, too.
|Not that I read much poetry.
Except the little ones in Reader's Digest,|Some are quite catchy.
Hey, I don't mean to rush things here, but|are you trying to get to some kind of point? Kids today.
Rush, rush, rush.
Well, the point, Angel, is you're|a very powerful young man, good for Faith.
And there just may be|a future for you here in Sunnydale.
I see you're admiring my letter opener.
Well, actually, I was thinking|of stabbing you through the heart with it.
Please do.
Nice shot.
You see, I'm what you might call|"impervious".
Can't be killed, or harmed in any way.
And that's just a cornerstone in my plans|for this great town of ours.
- Can't be killed.
But you don't like germs.
|- Awful things.
Unsanitary.
But my question is, now that Faith has|brought you back, what are your intentions? Well, gee, sir, I thought I'd find that slayer|that's giving you so much trouble, and torture, maim and kill her.
Fine.
It's nice to see you're not one of those|"slacker" types running around town today.
Yeah.
Torture Buffy.
Killing her's fine.
|Just make it a slow one.
- My favourite kind.
|- Wonderful.
We don't want a replacement|slayer anytime soon.
They can't all turn out like my girl Faith.
- Have fun.
|- Let's do it.
Try to have her home by 11.
She's not a little girl any more.
"I love when you talk, Wesley.
|I love when you sing, Wesley.
" Can you say the words "jail bait", Wesley?|Limey bastard! Hey, guys.
Where you been? You gotta find Buffy.
She's going|to her place to stock up That guy just bugs me.
- Faith.
Angel.
|- Hi, Joyce.
Nice to see you.
Is Buffy home? Upstairs.
Please tell me|it's not some vampire thing.
The only vampire here is me, Joyce.
Say did you change your hair? Highlights.
Looks nice.
Knock, knock.
- Where have you been?|- Looking for you.
Good thing we found you before you left.
- We got the books.
|- They're at the mansion.
We'd take 'em to Giles ourselves, but|I think strength in numbers is the way to go.
Let me get those for you.
OK, let's get the books|someplace safe.
Where are they? Actually, there's been|a slight change in plan, Buff.
"Buff"? You just called - What's the matter with you?|- Nothing.
Matter of fact, I haven't felt this good in a long time.
Angel? You know, I never properly thanked you|for sending me to Hell.
- No.
|- And I'm just wondering, where do I start? A card? Fruit basket? Evisceration? - No.
|- I know what you're thinking.
Maybe there's some good deep inside of me|that loves you, if only you could reach me.
But then again, we have reality.
I will kill you before I let you touch me.
Faith, we need to get out of here.
Now.
Speak for yourself, B.
Me? I like it here.
One thing I learned about Buffy.
|She's so cute when she's sleeping.
Hey, I know a way to make|investigating the Mayor even more boring.
- On second thought, no, I don't.
|- Hey, whoa.
Whoa.
Big "hey, whoa".
Guys, check this out.
Like father, like son.
How about "like exact same guy,|like exact same guy"? Mayor Wilkins is over 100 years old.
- He's not human.
|- I hate to spoil the mood.
- But this is so much worse than you think.
|- Xander.
What happened to you? You know how some people|hate to say "I told you so"? Not me.
I told you so.
Angel's back.
In the really bad sense.
And I told you so.
Angelus has turned? Xander,|this is terribly serious.
Are you sure? Gee, let me think.
Kinda hard to tell.
|Last thing I remember is his fist.
- We must contact Giles immediately.
|- Good thinking.
Let's waste time with a lively debate,|leave Buffy alone and see how dead she gets.
- Slow down.
This isn't Wesley's fault.
|- Actually, it is.
Faith was your responsibility.
- Guess who's Angel's new playmate?|- Faith and Angel? Together? Imagine the possibilities.
Mornin', sleepyhead.
You know|what I just can't believe? All of our time together|and we never tried chains.
Well, you can't dwell in the past.
Especially with the future we have ahead.
Bondage looks good on you, B.
|The outfit's all wrong, but hey.
- You don't know what you're doing.
|- Really? Weird.
Cos something about all this|just feels so right.
Maybe it's one of those|"unhappy childhood" things.
See, when I was a kid|I used to beg my mom for a dog.
Didn't matter what kind.
I just wanted,|you know, something to love.
A dog's all I wanted.
Well, that and toys.
But Mom was so busy enjoying|the drinking and passing out parts of life that I never really got|what I wanted.
Until now.
Faith, listen to me very closely.
Angel's a killer.
When he's|done with me, he'll turn on you.
She's right.
I probably will.
Yeah? I guess we'll just have to|keep you around a while then.
Before we get started,|I just want you to know, if you're a screamer, feel free.
Why, Faith? What's in it for you? What isn't? I come to Sunnydale, I'm a slayer,|I do my job kickin' ass better than anyone.
But what do I hear about everywhere I go? Buffy.
So I slay, I behave,|I do the good little girl routine, and who does everybody thank? - Buffy.
|- That's not my fault.
Everyone always asks|"Why can't you be more like Buffy?" Did anyone ask if you could be more like me? I know I didn't.
You get the watcher, the mom, the little|Scooby Gang.
What do I get? Jack squat.
- This was supposed to be my town!|- Faith, listen to me.
Why? So you can impart|some special Buffy wisdom, that it? Do you think you're better than me? Say it.
- You think you're better than me.
|- I am.
- Always have been.
|- Maybe you didn't notice.
Angel's with me.
And how'd you get him, Faith? Magic.
You cast some sort of spell? Because in the real world, Angel|would never touch you, and we both know it.
You had to tie me up to beat me.
|There's a word for people like you, Faith.
"Loser.
" You're just trying|to make me mad so I'll kill you.
But I'm too smart for that.
Stick around.
For what? Your boss's lame Ascension? Like I couldn't stop it? - You can't.
|- I will.
Keep dreaming.
No one can stop|the Ascension.
Mayor's got it wired, B.
He built this town for demons to feed on,|and come Graduation Day, he's gettin' paid.
And I'll be sitting at his right hand.
Assuming he has hands after the|transformation.
I'm not too clear on that part.
And all your little lame-ass friends|are gonna be Kibbles 'n Bits.
Think about that when|your boyfriend's cuttin' into you.
I never knew you had so much rage in you.
What can I say? I'm the world's best actor.
Second best.
Graduation Day.
|You think we missed anything? I think we know everything she knows.
May I say something? - Psych.
|- You played me.
You played me! What are you gonna do, B?|Kill me, you become me.
You're not ready for that yet! Are you OK? - The task is finished.
|- Yes.
Thank you for coming to me.
And for that rather effective|light show you put on.
This restores the balance|between us, Rupert Giles.
My debt to you is now repaid in full.
- Do not call upon me again.
|- I shan't.
Peace with you.
And with you.
His debt to you is repaid? What did you do? I introduced him to his wife.
Well, I for one protest.
You've pitted slayer|against slayer in a dangerous charade that could have gotten them both killed.
|Without informing me.
- I'm telling the Council.
|- I think you should.
We have a rogue slayer.
- I can't think of anything more dangerous.
|- At least now we know.
And we know a little bit more|about the Ascension.
Graduation Day.
There's a big, scary un-fun.
At least Angel's not bad, though.
|That's good, right? Yes, I feel so much better knowing|that he broke my face in the "good" way.
- It's a "good" bruise.
|- He was only acting, Xander.
It was just an act.
Well, you win some, you lose some.
|It's batting average that counts.
So you lost some friends.
- I wouldn't exactly call them friends.
|- Then what are you worried about? Chin up.
You don't see me|looking disappointed.
Know why? Because I know you'll always have me, Faith,|the most important friend you'll ever have.
Besides, once the Ascension starts,|that "in crowd" you're so concerned about? They'll be lucky if there's enough|of them left to fill a pothole.
Promise.
Still unhappy? Okey-doke.
I've got two words that are|gonna make all the pain go away.
"Miniature.
" "Golf.
" - How you doin'?|- Been better.
Not hard to believe.
You were a real soldier last night, Buffy.
That's me.
One of the troops.
- I know how hard it was for you.
|- I really doubt that.
If there's anything I can do to make it better Look I know you only did what I asked.
|And we got what we wanted.
I never wanted it to go that far.
I know that.
It's not even a question of that.
It's just after I need a little bit of a break.
Please? Are you still my girl? Always.