The Suite Life of Zack & Cody s03e20 Episode Script
Doin' Time in Suite 2330
I am so steamed right now, that if I were I a mirror, you couldn't see yourself.
Zack, what were you thinking? Well, you see-- I don't want to hear it! Cody, what was going through your mind? It's just that.
.
Zip it, mister! We didn't mean to ruin the wedding.
It's just that we saw they had those mini hot dogs we love, and I'm weak.
I need help.
And they had the 3 kinds of mustard.
The jalapeño dijon was fabulous.
Really? I thought it was too spicy.
Why are you afraid of flavor? I'm not afraid of flavour Guys! I don't care about the dang sipping sauces! I care that you crashed a wedding! It's not like anyone got hurt.
I beg to differ! I don't know what hurt more, this little bride that jabbed me in the kidneys, or the real one who kicked me in the shins.
I hope you had your fun, because your life is going to fun-free for the rest of the week.
You're grounded.
Might I suggest 20 years on an island with giant boy-eating birds? You might! Odd, but you might.
Boys, go to your room.
Both: Yes, ma'am.
Mr.
moseby, sit down.
I'll clean you off.
Mm-hmm.
Ow! Here comes the groom.
Here I am in your life here you are in mine yes, we have a suite life most of the time you and me, we got the world to see so come on down just me and you know what to do so come on down it's you and me, and me and you we got the whole place to ourselves you and me, we got it all for free so come on down this is the suite life we've got a suite life Prisoners 001 and 002, I'm leaving! [Faint electronic music.]
Are you guys playing video games in there? Both: No.
Ok, well, I'm going now! Bye! [Softer voice.]
Love you.
Both: Love you.
[Electronic music and beeping.]
Aha! Put those games down.
Get out here.
Ok, apparently, your room is too much fun.
From now on, you're grounded in the living room.
Ok.
[Chuckles.]
[Gunshots on tv.]
And no tv.
Aw, man.
Zack, we don't need television and video games to entertain ourselves.
And no baking.
Aw, man! You heard mom.
Why don't we just sit here and think about what we have done? [Electronic music playing.]
Next time you try to limbo underneath a wedding cake, maybe you'll think twice.
Cody! Come on.
We have to get ready for the next fabulous episode of the webshow that's sweeping the nation yay me! Starring London tipton! They can't go.
They're being punished.
Well, I need Cody to produce yay me! Starring Stop that! So, Cody, you're officially unpunished.
London, you can't do that.
He's my son.
Oh.
I get it, I get it.
How much do you want for him? Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Buy me, too! Okie-dokie.
I'll take 'em both.
But I want a deal on the second one.
That's ridiculous, London.
[Belches.]
We talking cash? No! No, I'm not selling my sons.
Oh, fine! I'll rent 'em! I'll Mom, I have to be there to produce London's show.
We're up for an Internet award.
A golden nettie.
What is it? A statue of a guy in his undershirt in front of the computer? Maybe.
Anyway, I've got a great idea to win it.
I noticed the cheetah girls checking in as the bridesmaids were chasing us through the lobby.
How how did I miss the cheetah girls? You were being tackled by the flower girl.
You know for a 7-year-old, she was tough.
She had a mean left hook! Anyway, to be named producer of the year, I have to produce.
See the connection? Why don't you connect your butts to those chairs? Going out now.
And I've informed the hotel staff to be on the lookout.
So if either of you leave this room, I will know.
We so need to get her a hobby.
It's spelled m-a-d-d-I-e.
Although for legal purposes, it really should be Madeline.
M-a-d-e.
.
Stop.
I didn't really put you in my will.
But on the phone, you said that I lied.
Look, I just needed a way to get you up here.
What's wrong with "maddie, can you come up here"? Oh, yeah Sorry.
Anyway, I'm putting you in charge my show Yay me! Starring London tipton! I thought Cody was your producer.
[Sighs.]
He got grounded by his producer.
So would you produce yay me! Starring London Stop that! You know, if you produce a great segment, you could win the golden nettie.
Ooh.
That would look good on my college applications.
You know what's gonna look good on my college applications? A check for the new libary.
Ok, to win that award, we're gonna need someone famous.
Someone huge.
Someone no one has ever gotten before.
[Gasps.]
I know! Bigfoot.
London.
Bigfoot is a legend.
That's why he'd make such a great guest.
No, no, no.
I mean, he's a mythical creature.
A figment of the imagination.
A biological impossibility.
Just buy him a huge pair of Italian loafers.
He'll do it.
What are you doing? You can make your toes look like little tiny people.
This one's name is pinky, and this one's name is Mr.
zimmelman.
Yeah? Well, maybe Mr.
zimmelman can find a way for me to get the cheetah girls without leaving the suite, which is a grounding violation.
You sicken me.
And Mr.
z.
Can't leave the suite.
What a joke.
Oh! I wonder what'll happen if I do this? Whoa! Nothing happened.
I'm in.
I'm out.
I'm in.
I'm out.
Now my right arm's in, and now my right arm's out.
If you hokey pokey, I'm gonna slap you all about.
Come on, Cody.
Take a risk.
One that doesn't involve using a new brand [high voice.]
Of fabric softener.
Good point.
So I hear Chris brown is staying on this floor.
If you tell me what room he's in, I'll give you 20 bucks.
I'm in this room.
Thanks.
Um, can I have some soap? Uh, here you go.
Thanks.
Keep the change.
You're.
.
You're.
.
You're.
.
Feeling a draft.
I'm gonna go inside.
Oh! Oh! Wait! Wait! I'm producing a webshow called yay me! Starring London tipton.
We'd be honored to have you as a guest.
Yay me! I love that show.
Starring London tipton! Don't tell anybody I did that.
I won't.
Appreciate that.
Ok.
[Giggling.]
Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! That was odd.
I have to get to the cheetah girls' suite before we get spotted.
Oh, relax.
There is no one here who is going to rat us out to mom.
Mr.
moseby: Right this way, ladies.
Except the big rat himself! Now if you'll just follow me.
Heh heh.
Ladies, I must say, thank you so much for signing those autographs for my niece.
Oh, no problem.
And tell little Marion we said hi.
I will.
And I must say it is such an honor having the cheetah girls here at the tipton.
[Roars.]
[Cheetah girls murmur.]
Ok.
Yeah, that was just me being a cheetah guy.
Maybe we could do the dance thing.
No, no, no.
I'll just open the door then.
There you are.
Thank you, Mr.
moseby.
Uh-huh.
I liked your cheetah.
Oh? Yes! Now that was odd.
No, that was downright scary.
This is great.
All I have to do is get them on London's show and that golden nettie is mine.
Kiely: Who's there? [Trills.]
Room service.
Yo, who ordered Hmm.
I thought I ordered nachos.
Well, feel free to cover me in cheese sauce.
They do look cute enough to eat.
Hi, I'm Cody Martin, executive producer of yay me! Starring London tipton.
Oh, I love that show! You're the goofy kid London makes do silly stuff.
[Cheetah girls laughing.]
I'm his brother.
I'm his brother.
Anyway, how would you ladies feel about making a guest appearance on the show? Sounds good to me.
Great.
Show up at the penthouse suite tomorrow at 3:00.
We'll be there, tiny dancer.
Mwah.
Kiely: Bye.
That golden nettie is in the bag! London, I have great news about the show.
Oh! Me, too! Maddie's taking your place till you get out of the joint.
She got Chris brown to be a guest.
She did? Yep! She's a much better producer than you.
No, she's not! I got Fired.
You can kiss that golden nettie good-bye.
What about the cheetah girls? Well, if London doesn't want 'em, I'll take 'em.
London, have you seen Chris brown? I can't find him anywhere.
He's in the green room.
You know, where all the guests wait before the show? I know what it is.
I just didn't know we had one.
Where is it? Oh.
Can I come on yet? Oh! So sorry about that.
Can I offer you a refreshment? Oh, no, I'm good.
There was a cheese plate by the shoes.
Great.
Just make yourself comfortable.
Do you know what questions you're going to ask? Yes.
Maddie, why are you so happy even though you're poor? Not for me, for our guest! Money doesn't buy happiness, ok.
Yes, it does.
Here.
See? I was wrong.
Boys, you sure you don't want any of cheap Charlie's pretzels? What happened, mom? They didn't have the large size? Couldn't fit it in the trunk.
I've got to get my job back.
When is mom going to leave? Ah, don't worry.
I'll handle it.
Hey, mom.
When you going to leave? Be-be-because We didn't want you to be late for rehearsal.
Oh, honey, that's sweet.
But I canceled rehearsal because I wanted to spend the day home with you guys.
You don't trust us.
Not since you started walking.
[Whispering.]
What am I going to do? Hey, Cody.
Why don't weinvent something to do in our room? What? No electronic stuff.
Oh, don't worry, mom.
We'll invent something to do.
Oh! Right.
Invent.
In our room.
I love to invent.
Uhh! Think mom's going to realize we snuck out? Ah, don't worry.
I put the recording we made on an endless loop.
Excellent.
Cody on recording: Zack, do you have any 9s? Zack on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any 2s? Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any jokers? Oh! All right, take them out, and let's start over.
Zack, do you have any 9s? Nope.
Go fish.
You have any 2s? London tipton's really great really great, really great London tipton's really great and deserves the opposite of hate Which is love! Welcome to yay me! Starring London tipton! [Applause on recording.]
With special guest producer Madeline Margaret Genevieve Miranda Catherine Fitzpatrick.
[Applauseon recording.]
Um, hello.
This is yay me! Not yay, all you guys.
Please welcome my first guest: Chris brown! [Applauseon recording.]
Hi, Chris!Welcome to the show.
Thank you for having me.
[Applause on recording.]
Oh, stop.
What a great audience.
So, do you enjoy living in the vast forests of the great northwest? I live in a loft in New York.
Interesting.
Interesting.
Do you have trouble finding shoes with such big feet? I only wear size 11.
London, those are the questions for bigfoot.
Bigfoot on the show? Oh, no, no, no.
No.
We devoted the entire show just to you.
Hi! We're here to be the guests on the show.
London! You booked the cheetah girls and didn't tell me? [Gasps.]
I guess I didn't tell me either.
So sorry we're late.
Someone got a press-on fingernail caught in her extension.
It happens, ok? Cheetah girls.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh! You're Chris brown! Ow! I am so Help me, please.
Oh! Please.
Please.
Ow! Ow! You know, it's funny.
We've been crawling around these vents for years without any problems.
And these things are only meant to carry air.
And we're bigger than we used to be.
And if you think about it, it's amazing that these things can still hold us up.
Well, chalk it up to good 'ol American craftsmanship.
[Metal groans.]
Uh-oh.
I'm sure the blonde kid did book you, but he's not here right now, is he? [Metal groans.]
[All yelling.]
Yes, he is! [Groans.]
Let me help you.
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
By the way, you're my favorite.
Cody, I thought you were grounded.
Well, I am, but I have to win that golden nettie.
If anyone's going to win that award, it's me.
I got Chris brown.
Chris, have a seat.
I'm the producer, and what I say goes.
Sorry, Chris.
Girls, take a seat on the couch.
No, no, no.
You werethe producer.
I'm the producer now.
Chris, pop a squat on the couch, ok? Not so fast.
Chris, out.
Girls, in.
Glad bigfoot didn't show up.
By the way, you're my favorite.
He said i was his favorite.
I'm clearly the better producer.
I got Oh, well, mine can do the Uncle Jackie.
It's called aunt Jackie.
Ok, not now, Chris.
Let's settle this with a dance-off.
You, do the aunt Jackie.
You, do something cheetahlicious.
Why don't I just show 'em some of my dances? Ok.
[Hip-hop music playing.]
Uhh, uhh get up Whoo! [Murmuring.]
Y'all's turn.
No, you're definitely going to have to break that down for us.
Oh all right.
We can do that.
Right here.
One, two.
Sabrina: Whoo! It's cheetahlicious! Oh! You know, you're my favorite.
Aw.
Cody on recording: Zack, do you have any 9s? Zack on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Ok.
There you are.
Got it.
[Grunts.]
Oh! All right.
Take them out and let's start over.
Zack, do you have any 9s? Wow, I'm thirsty.
[Knock on door.]
Come in.
Oh, hey, Mr.
moseby.
What brings you up here? Hotel too quiet now that the boys are in lockdown? Well, that is actually why I came up.
I have often said that you are a terrible mother.
You have? Mostly to other people.
But I must admit, this time you have really laid down the law.
Thank you, Mr.
moseby.
I know it's hard to remember when you're picking cake out of your ears, but they really are good kids.
Cody on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Those lousy little weasels! They've snuck out, haven't they? Go fish.
You have any 2s? Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any jokers? Oh! All right.
Take.
.
Do you have any idea where those little weasels might be? Well, Zack.
.
Anywhere that there's food or girls.
Cody was upset about not being able to produce London's webshow.
Carey: What do they think they're doing? Hmm.
I believe that's the aunt Jackie.
Yeah.
Well, see, I love Chris brown.
I have to get his autograph.
For my niece.
You know.
She loves the way he does the thing.
Pushing back and backing in.
.
Oh, Carey.
.
Wow.
This hasturned into a great show.
I know.
I guess we could share the golden nettie.
Well, ok.
But my name goes first.
Uh, mine.
Carey: Oh.
Hi, Carey! Sorry! We don't have room for anymore guests.
Thanks! Show's over.
Boys, we need to talk.
Not now.
I'm trying to produce a show.
I mean, I love you.
Turn the music off! Boys, I am so disappointed in you two.
You deliberately disobeyed me.
And broke my vent! Uh, just a head's up, mom.
You're yelling at us on an international broadcast.
Oh, really? I didn't realize.
I don't care! I am so sick of this constant cycle of breaking the rules, getting grounded, sneaking out, getting grounded, breaking the rules.
.
Well, maybe you could break the cycle this time by not grounding us.
Oh, dude.
Oh, that is it.
You are beyond grounded.
The next time you see sunlight.
.
Oh, actually, no! You're never going to see sunlight again, because by the time your punishment is over, the sun will have burnt out, collapsed into black hole, and the last remnants of mankind will be living on a rusty little spaceship, as the cold silence of space slowly drives them mad! I think she's halfway there.
I heard that! We're not laughing at you.
We're laughing with you.
Please don't ground us.
We have a concert tonight.
We're playing at the.
.
Well, it looks like we're out of time.
Carey: Oh, you said it.
March.
I'm just going to get Chris brown's autograph for my.
.
March! Ok! [Theme music playing.]
London tipton's really great Everybody, sing! London tipton's really great All: really great, really great London tipton's really great and deserves the opposite of hate Which is love! Which is love.
Love Mom, we just want to tell you again how sorry we are.
Yeah, really sorry.
Thank you, sweetie.
Next.
All right.
You're clean.
Yeah, of course he's clean.
He bathes every 20 minutes.
No laughing in the big house.
Uh, do I get a last meal? Yes.
I'm cooking it.
Aren't I being punished enough? Guess what? We won the golden nettie.
[Both cheering.]
So what put you over the top? Chris brown or the cheetah girls? Neither.
They loved ranting mom.
It was the top download of the week! I was the top download of the week?! Yeah! And they have all these cool remixes where lightning bolts come out of your eyes and smoke comes out of your ears Shut up! I know! Ooh! Wait a minute.
If you're here, then who's producing yay me? London's producing herself.
She got another cool celebrity guest.
So, how does it feel to be a hip-hop sensation? Uhh? Oh.
These were questions for Chris brown.
Sorry.
I guess I put my big foot in my mouth.
[No audio.]
Anyway, let's plug your new book.
The great villas of Tuscany.
Sounds fascinating.
But let's talk hair.
Have you tried conditioner?
Zack, what were you thinking? Well, you see-- I don't want to hear it! Cody, what was going through your mind? It's just that.
.
Zip it, mister! We didn't mean to ruin the wedding.
It's just that we saw they had those mini hot dogs we love, and I'm weak.
I need help.
And they had the 3 kinds of mustard.
The jalapeño dijon was fabulous.
Really? I thought it was too spicy.
Why are you afraid of flavor? I'm not afraid of flavour Guys! I don't care about the dang sipping sauces! I care that you crashed a wedding! It's not like anyone got hurt.
I beg to differ! I don't know what hurt more, this little bride that jabbed me in the kidneys, or the real one who kicked me in the shins.
I hope you had your fun, because your life is going to fun-free for the rest of the week.
You're grounded.
Might I suggest 20 years on an island with giant boy-eating birds? You might! Odd, but you might.
Boys, go to your room.
Both: Yes, ma'am.
Mr.
moseby, sit down.
I'll clean you off.
Mm-hmm.
Ow! Here comes the groom.
Here I am in your life here you are in mine yes, we have a suite life most of the time you and me, we got the world to see so come on down just me and you know what to do so come on down it's you and me, and me and you we got the whole place to ourselves you and me, we got it all for free so come on down this is the suite life we've got a suite life Prisoners 001 and 002, I'm leaving! [Faint electronic music.]
Are you guys playing video games in there? Both: No.
Ok, well, I'm going now! Bye! [Softer voice.]
Love you.
Both: Love you.
[Electronic music and beeping.]
Aha! Put those games down.
Get out here.
Ok, apparently, your room is too much fun.
From now on, you're grounded in the living room.
Ok.
[Chuckles.]
[Gunshots on tv.]
And no tv.
Aw, man.
Zack, we don't need television and video games to entertain ourselves.
And no baking.
Aw, man! You heard mom.
Why don't we just sit here and think about what we have done? [Electronic music playing.]
Next time you try to limbo underneath a wedding cake, maybe you'll think twice.
Cody! Come on.
We have to get ready for the next fabulous episode of the webshow that's sweeping the nation yay me! Starring London tipton! They can't go.
They're being punished.
Well, I need Cody to produce yay me! Starring Stop that! So, Cody, you're officially unpunished.
London, you can't do that.
He's my son.
Oh.
I get it, I get it.
How much do you want for him? Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Buy me, too! Okie-dokie.
I'll take 'em both.
But I want a deal on the second one.
That's ridiculous, London.
[Belches.]
We talking cash? No! No, I'm not selling my sons.
Oh, fine! I'll rent 'em! I'll Mom, I have to be there to produce London's show.
We're up for an Internet award.
A golden nettie.
What is it? A statue of a guy in his undershirt in front of the computer? Maybe.
Anyway, I've got a great idea to win it.
I noticed the cheetah girls checking in as the bridesmaids were chasing us through the lobby.
How how did I miss the cheetah girls? You were being tackled by the flower girl.
You know for a 7-year-old, she was tough.
She had a mean left hook! Anyway, to be named producer of the year, I have to produce.
See the connection? Why don't you connect your butts to those chairs? Going out now.
And I've informed the hotel staff to be on the lookout.
So if either of you leave this room, I will know.
We so need to get her a hobby.
It's spelled m-a-d-d-I-e.
Although for legal purposes, it really should be Madeline.
M-a-d-e.
.
Stop.
I didn't really put you in my will.
But on the phone, you said that I lied.
Look, I just needed a way to get you up here.
What's wrong with "maddie, can you come up here"? Oh, yeah Sorry.
Anyway, I'm putting you in charge my show Yay me! Starring London tipton! I thought Cody was your producer.
[Sighs.]
He got grounded by his producer.
So would you produce yay me! Starring London Stop that! You know, if you produce a great segment, you could win the golden nettie.
Ooh.
That would look good on my college applications.
You know what's gonna look good on my college applications? A check for the new libary.
Ok, to win that award, we're gonna need someone famous.
Someone huge.
Someone no one has ever gotten before.
[Gasps.]
I know! Bigfoot.
London.
Bigfoot is a legend.
That's why he'd make such a great guest.
No, no, no.
I mean, he's a mythical creature.
A figment of the imagination.
A biological impossibility.
Just buy him a huge pair of Italian loafers.
He'll do it.
What are you doing? You can make your toes look like little tiny people.
This one's name is pinky, and this one's name is Mr.
zimmelman.
Yeah? Well, maybe Mr.
zimmelman can find a way for me to get the cheetah girls without leaving the suite, which is a grounding violation.
You sicken me.
And Mr.
z.
Can't leave the suite.
What a joke.
Oh! I wonder what'll happen if I do this? Whoa! Nothing happened.
I'm in.
I'm out.
I'm in.
I'm out.
Now my right arm's in, and now my right arm's out.
If you hokey pokey, I'm gonna slap you all about.
Come on, Cody.
Take a risk.
One that doesn't involve using a new brand [high voice.]
Of fabric softener.
Good point.
So I hear Chris brown is staying on this floor.
If you tell me what room he's in, I'll give you 20 bucks.
I'm in this room.
Thanks.
Um, can I have some soap? Uh, here you go.
Thanks.
Keep the change.
You're.
.
You're.
.
You're.
.
Feeling a draft.
I'm gonna go inside.
Oh! Oh! Wait! Wait! I'm producing a webshow called yay me! Starring London tipton.
We'd be honored to have you as a guest.
Yay me! I love that show.
Starring London tipton! Don't tell anybody I did that.
I won't.
Appreciate that.
Ok.
[Giggling.]
Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! Uh-oh! That was odd.
I have to get to the cheetah girls' suite before we get spotted.
Oh, relax.
There is no one here who is going to rat us out to mom.
Mr.
moseby: Right this way, ladies.
Except the big rat himself! Now if you'll just follow me.
Heh heh.
Ladies, I must say, thank you so much for signing those autographs for my niece.
Oh, no problem.
And tell little Marion we said hi.
I will.
And I must say it is such an honor having the cheetah girls here at the tipton.
[Roars.]
[Cheetah girls murmur.]
Ok.
Yeah, that was just me being a cheetah guy.
Maybe we could do the dance thing.
No, no, no.
I'll just open the door then.
There you are.
Thank you, Mr.
moseby.
Uh-huh.
I liked your cheetah.
Oh? Yes! Now that was odd.
No, that was downright scary.
This is great.
All I have to do is get them on London's show and that golden nettie is mine.
Kiely: Who's there? [Trills.]
Room service.
Yo, who ordered Hmm.
I thought I ordered nachos.
Well, feel free to cover me in cheese sauce.
They do look cute enough to eat.
Hi, I'm Cody Martin, executive producer of yay me! Starring London tipton.
Oh, I love that show! You're the goofy kid London makes do silly stuff.
[Cheetah girls laughing.]
I'm his brother.
I'm his brother.
Anyway, how would you ladies feel about making a guest appearance on the show? Sounds good to me.
Great.
Show up at the penthouse suite tomorrow at 3:00.
We'll be there, tiny dancer.
Mwah.
Kiely: Bye.
That golden nettie is in the bag! London, I have great news about the show.
Oh! Me, too! Maddie's taking your place till you get out of the joint.
She got Chris brown to be a guest.
She did? Yep! She's a much better producer than you.
No, she's not! I got Fired.
You can kiss that golden nettie good-bye.
What about the cheetah girls? Well, if London doesn't want 'em, I'll take 'em.
London, have you seen Chris brown? I can't find him anywhere.
He's in the green room.
You know, where all the guests wait before the show? I know what it is.
I just didn't know we had one.
Where is it? Oh.
Can I come on yet? Oh! So sorry about that.
Can I offer you a refreshment? Oh, no, I'm good.
There was a cheese plate by the shoes.
Great.
Just make yourself comfortable.
Do you know what questions you're going to ask? Yes.
Maddie, why are you so happy even though you're poor? Not for me, for our guest! Money doesn't buy happiness, ok.
Yes, it does.
Here.
See? I was wrong.
Boys, you sure you don't want any of cheap Charlie's pretzels? What happened, mom? They didn't have the large size? Couldn't fit it in the trunk.
I've got to get my job back.
When is mom going to leave? Ah, don't worry.
I'll handle it.
Hey, mom.
When you going to leave? Be-be-because We didn't want you to be late for rehearsal.
Oh, honey, that's sweet.
But I canceled rehearsal because I wanted to spend the day home with you guys.
You don't trust us.
Not since you started walking.
[Whispering.]
What am I going to do? Hey, Cody.
Why don't weinvent something to do in our room? What? No electronic stuff.
Oh, don't worry, mom.
We'll invent something to do.
Oh! Right.
Invent.
In our room.
I love to invent.
Uhh! Think mom's going to realize we snuck out? Ah, don't worry.
I put the recording we made on an endless loop.
Excellent.
Cody on recording: Zack, do you have any 9s? Zack on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any 2s? Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any jokers? Oh! All right, take them out, and let's start over.
Zack, do you have any 9s? Nope.
Go fish.
You have any 2s? London tipton's really great really great, really great London tipton's really great and deserves the opposite of hate Which is love! Welcome to yay me! Starring London tipton! [Applause on recording.]
With special guest producer Madeline Margaret Genevieve Miranda Catherine Fitzpatrick.
[Applauseon recording.]
Um, hello.
This is yay me! Not yay, all you guys.
Please welcome my first guest: Chris brown! [Applauseon recording.]
Hi, Chris!Welcome to the show.
Thank you for having me.
[Applause on recording.]
Oh, stop.
What a great audience.
So, do you enjoy living in the vast forests of the great northwest? I live in a loft in New York.
Interesting.
Interesting.
Do you have trouble finding shoes with such big feet? I only wear size 11.
London, those are the questions for bigfoot.
Bigfoot on the show? Oh, no, no, no.
No.
We devoted the entire show just to you.
Hi! We're here to be the guests on the show.
London! You booked the cheetah girls and didn't tell me? [Gasps.]
I guess I didn't tell me either.
So sorry we're late.
Someone got a press-on fingernail caught in her extension.
It happens, ok? Cheetah girls.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh! You're Chris brown! Ow! I am so Help me, please.
Oh! Please.
Please.
Ow! Ow! You know, it's funny.
We've been crawling around these vents for years without any problems.
And these things are only meant to carry air.
And we're bigger than we used to be.
And if you think about it, it's amazing that these things can still hold us up.
Well, chalk it up to good 'ol American craftsmanship.
[Metal groans.]
Uh-oh.
I'm sure the blonde kid did book you, but he's not here right now, is he? [Metal groans.]
[All yelling.]
Yes, he is! [Groans.]
Let me help you.
Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
By the way, you're my favorite.
Cody, I thought you were grounded.
Well, I am, but I have to win that golden nettie.
If anyone's going to win that award, it's me.
I got Chris brown.
Chris, have a seat.
I'm the producer, and what I say goes.
Sorry, Chris.
Girls, take a seat on the couch.
No, no, no.
You werethe producer.
I'm the producer now.
Chris, pop a squat on the couch, ok? Not so fast.
Chris, out.
Girls, in.
Glad bigfoot didn't show up.
By the way, you're my favorite.
He said i was his favorite.
I'm clearly the better producer.
I got Oh, well, mine can do the Uncle Jackie.
It's called aunt Jackie.
Ok, not now, Chris.
Let's settle this with a dance-off.
You, do the aunt Jackie.
You, do something cheetahlicious.
Why don't I just show 'em some of my dances? Ok.
[Hip-hop music playing.]
Uhh, uhh get up Whoo! [Murmuring.]
Y'all's turn.
No, you're definitely going to have to break that down for us.
Oh all right.
We can do that.
Right here.
One, two.
Sabrina: Whoo! It's cheetahlicious! Oh! You know, you're my favorite.
Aw.
Cody on recording: Zack, do you have any 9s? Zack on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Ok.
There you are.
Got it.
[Grunts.]
Oh! All right.
Take them out and let's start over.
Zack, do you have any 9s? Wow, I'm thirsty.
[Knock on door.]
Come in.
Oh, hey, Mr.
moseby.
What brings you up here? Hotel too quiet now that the boys are in lockdown? Well, that is actually why I came up.
I have often said that you are a terrible mother.
You have? Mostly to other people.
But I must admit, this time you have really laid down the law.
Thank you, Mr.
moseby.
I know it's hard to remember when you're picking cake out of your ears, but they really are good kids.
Cody on recording: Nope.
Go fish.
Those lousy little weasels! They've snuck out, haven't they? Go fish.
You have any 2s? Nope.
Go fish.
Do you have any jokers? Oh! All right.
Take.
.
Do you have any idea where those little weasels might be? Well, Zack.
.
Anywhere that there's food or girls.
Cody was upset about not being able to produce London's webshow.
Carey: What do they think they're doing? Hmm.
I believe that's the aunt Jackie.
Yeah.
Well, see, I love Chris brown.
I have to get his autograph.
For my niece.
You know.
She loves the way he does the thing.
Pushing back and backing in.
.
Oh, Carey.
.
Wow.
This hasturned into a great show.
I know.
I guess we could share the golden nettie.
Well, ok.
But my name goes first.
Uh, mine.
Carey: Oh.
Hi, Carey! Sorry! We don't have room for anymore guests.
Thanks! Show's over.
Boys, we need to talk.
Not now.
I'm trying to produce a show.
I mean, I love you.
Turn the music off! Boys, I am so disappointed in you two.
You deliberately disobeyed me.
And broke my vent! Uh, just a head's up, mom.
You're yelling at us on an international broadcast.
Oh, really? I didn't realize.
I don't care! I am so sick of this constant cycle of breaking the rules, getting grounded, sneaking out, getting grounded, breaking the rules.
.
Well, maybe you could break the cycle this time by not grounding us.
Oh, dude.
Oh, that is it.
You are beyond grounded.
The next time you see sunlight.
.
Oh, actually, no! You're never going to see sunlight again, because by the time your punishment is over, the sun will have burnt out, collapsed into black hole, and the last remnants of mankind will be living on a rusty little spaceship, as the cold silence of space slowly drives them mad! I think she's halfway there.
I heard that! We're not laughing at you.
We're laughing with you.
Please don't ground us.
We have a concert tonight.
We're playing at the.
.
Well, it looks like we're out of time.
Carey: Oh, you said it.
March.
I'm just going to get Chris brown's autograph for my.
.
March! Ok! [Theme music playing.]
London tipton's really great Everybody, sing! London tipton's really great All: really great, really great London tipton's really great and deserves the opposite of hate Which is love! Which is love.
Love Mom, we just want to tell you again how sorry we are.
Yeah, really sorry.
Thank you, sweetie.
Next.
All right.
You're clean.
Yeah, of course he's clean.
He bathes every 20 minutes.
No laughing in the big house.
Uh, do I get a last meal? Yes.
I'm cooking it.
Aren't I being punished enough? Guess what? We won the golden nettie.
[Both cheering.]
So what put you over the top? Chris brown or the cheetah girls? Neither.
They loved ranting mom.
It was the top download of the week! I was the top download of the week?! Yeah! And they have all these cool remixes where lightning bolts come out of your eyes and smoke comes out of your ears Shut up! I know! Ooh! Wait a minute.
If you're here, then who's producing yay me? London's producing herself.
She got another cool celebrity guest.
So, how does it feel to be a hip-hop sensation? Uhh? Oh.
These were questions for Chris brown.
Sorry.
I guess I put my big foot in my mouth.
[No audio.]
Anyway, let's plug your new book.
The great villas of Tuscany.
Sounds fascinating.
But let's talk hair.
Have you tried conditioner?