Impractical Jokers (2017) s03e21 Episode Script

narrator: Coming up, why is q acting like a boob? [ laughter .]
Acting like a boob? [ laughter .]
why is murr spreading the news? [ laughter .]
why is murr spreading the news? I just cropdusted you.
Why is murr spreading the news? I just cropdusted you.
[ laughter .]
I just cropdusted you.
[ laughter .]
narrator: And which joker [ laughter .]
narrator: And which joker will sink his teeth into narrator: And which joker will sink his teeth into tonight's punishment? Will sink his teeth into tonight's punishment? [ laughter .]
Tonight's punishment? [ laughter .]
prepare for something [ laughter .]
prepare for something amazing.
prepare for something amazing.
hey, mustache, what's up? Amazing.
hey, mustache, what's up? [ laughter .]
hey, mustache, what's up? [ laughter .]
I want my mommy! [ laughter .]
I want my mommy! [ laughter .]
I want my mommy! [ laughter .]
I will never forgive you! [ laughter .]
I will never forgive you! larry! I will never forgive you! larry! [ laughter .]
today, we're at bridal reflections, helping Bridal reflections, helping brides-to-be pick out that Brides-to-be pick out that perfect wedding dress.
Perfect wedding dress.
while helping the lovely while helping the lovely ladies shop, we'll have to do Ladies shop, we'll have to do and say what the other guys tell And say what the other guys tell us.
Us.
if you refuse anything, you if you refuse anything, you lose.
Lose.
I doNot have any lines in I doNot have any lines in this intro.
murr, your hair looks good like that.
Like that.
Remember when you used to let Remember when you used to let your hair grow out and it looked Your hair grow out and it looked like a duck was taking a [bleep.]
Like a duck was taking a [bleep.]
on your head? On your head? Like, you looked like you had a Like, you looked like you had a duck on your head.
Duck on your head.
Looked like you had a duck with Looked like you had a duck with a bald back.
A bald back.
what you talking about? what you talking about? murr, I came to you, and I murr, I came to you, and I said, "bud" -- what did I say? Said, "bud" -- what did I say? you said, "you look better you said, "you look better with much, much -- very short With much, much -- very short hair.
" Hair.
" and, to your credit, I look very And, to your credit, I look very good with short hair.
Good with short hair.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
hi, ladies.
How are you? Hi, ladies.
How are you? Come back this way, and I'll get Come back this way, and I'll get you a dressing room.
You a dressing room.
You can try them on.
Sure.
You can try them on.
Sure.
And then bring them out here.
And then bring them out here.
Let's take a look.
Let's take a look.
The pink one is not the one? The pink one is not the one? no.
I saw it over there.
no.
I saw it over there.
is the purple one correct? is the purple one correct? purple one is correct.
purple one is correct.
close the door, murr.
close the door, murr.
Get in -- go in there and close Get in -- go in there and close the door.
The door.
okay.
okay.
Just give us one second.
Just give us one second.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
oh, so these are both for you to try on? Oh, so these are both for you to try on? But this was not the correct Try on? But this was not the correct one.
But this was not the correct one.
murr, pop your head out.
One.
murr, pop your head out.
Pop your head out.
murr, pop your head out.
Pop your head out.
"what's the style number?" Pop your head out.
"what's the style number?" what's the style number on "what's the style number?" what's the style number on it? what's the style number on it? 749.
It? 749.
Yeah, so that's the wrong dress.
749.
Yeah, so that's the wrong dress.
[ laughter .]
Yeah, so that's the wrong dress.
[ laughter .]
get in there and get the [ laughter .]
get in there and get the other girl out -- kick the other get in there and get the other girl out -- kick the other girl out and close the door on Other girl out -- kick the other girl out and close the door on the other girl.
Girl out and close the door on the other girl.
okay, great, great, great, The other girl.
okay, great, great, great, great, great, great.
okay, great, great, great, great, great, great.
Okay.
Great, great, great.
Okay.
[ laughter .]
Okay.
[ laughter .]
okay, they're ready, so go for [ laughter .]
okay, they're ready, so go for it, hon, and we'll be right out Okay, they're ready, so go for it, hon, and we'll be right out here waiting to see how it is.
It, hon, and we'll be right out here waiting to see how it is.
okay.
Here waiting to see how it is.
okay.
okay.
okay.
okay.
murr, ask her to move out for okay.
murr, ask her to move out for a second and go in that room and murr, ask her to move out for a second and go in that room and shut the door.
A second and go in that room and shut the door.
would you excuse me for one Shut the door.
would you excuse me for one second? would you excuse me for one second? yeah, sure.
Second? yeah, sure.
thank you.
yeah, sure.
thank you.
now start crying.
thank you.
now start crying.
[ muffled sobbing .]
now start crying.
[ muffled sobbing .]
[ laughter .]
[ muffled sobbing .]
[ laughter .]
[ sobbing continues .]
[ laughter .]
[ sobbing continues .]
[ laughter .]
she went in the room with the girl.
all right, come out, come Girl.
all right, come out, come out, come out.
all right, come out, come out, come out.
Go to the door and go, "hey, Out, come out.
Go to the door and go, "hey, what are you guys talking Go to the door and go, "hey, what are you guys talking about?" what are you guys talking about? [ laughter .]
About? [ laughter .]
oh, okay, okay.
[ laughter .]
oh, okay, okay.
I'll be right out here.
oh, okay, okay.
I'll be right out here.
[ laughter .]
I'll be right out here.
[ laughter .]
[ ding! .]
[ laughter .]
[ ding! .]
oh, my god! [ ding! .]
oh, my god! you can just go right oh, my god! you can just go right through there.
you can just go right through there.
hey.
How are you? Through there.
hey.
How are you? hi.
hey.
How are you? hi.
[ laughter .]
hi.
[ laughter .]
she looked like she hated me.
she looked like she hated me.
did you do something to her? it looked like our families? Have been feuding for centuries.
Have been feuding for centuries.
the hatfields and vulcanos? the hatfields and vulcanos? sal, as soon as the bride sal, as soon as the bride walks in, hit her with a "I'm so [bleep.]
excited for you.
" Walks in, hit her with a "I'm so [bleep.]
excited for you.
" [ chuckles .]
[bleep.]
excited for you.
" [ chuckles .]
[ laughter .]
Oh! So nice.
thank you.
got the full-length here.
thank you.
got the full-length here.
I'm so [bleep.]
excited for you.
got the full-length here.
I'm so [bleep.]
excited for you.
[ laughter .]
I'm so [bleep.]
excited for you.
[ laughter .]
did you book your money-poon [ laughter .]
did you book your money-poon yet? did you book your money-poon yet? [ laughter .]
Yet? [ laughter .]
where are you guys headed on [ laughter .]
where are you guys headed on your, uh where are you guys headed on your, uh [ laughter .]
Your, uh [ laughter .]
where are you guys headed on [ laughter .]
where are you guys headed on your money-poon? Where are you guys headed on your money-poon? the honeymoon? Your money-poon? the honeymoon? yeah, the money-poon.
the honeymoon? yeah, the money-poon.
[ laughter .]
yeah, the money-poon.
[ laughter .]
bora-bora.
[ laughter .]
bora-bora.
oh, wow.
bora-bora.
oh, wow.
Oh, that's -- that's really oh, wow.
Oh, that's -- that's really nice.
Oh, that's -- that's really nice.
Yeah, my best friend went Nice.
Yeah, my best friend went yeah, I'm excited.
Yeah, my best friend went yeah, I'm excited.
For his money-poon.
[ laughter .]
hm? you keep saying that.
Hm? you keep saying that.
[ laughter .]
you keep saying that.
[ laughter .]
it's, uh, dyslexia.
[ laughter .]
it's, uh, dyslexia.
[ laughter .]
it's, uh, dyslexia.
[ laughter .]
okay, sal, ready? okay, sal, ready? Let's play a little hide-and-seek.
Let's play a little hide-and-seek.
hide-and-seek! Hide-and-seek.
hide-and-seek! gonna play a little hide-and-seek! gonna play a little hide-and-seek.
gonna play a little hide-and-seek.
plenty of places to hide in Hide-and-seek.
plenty of places to hide in here.
plenty of places to hide in here.
why don't you go hide behind Here.
why don't you go hide behind some dresses? why don't you go hide behind some dresses? Right back there in your little Some dresses? Right back there in your little hidey-hole.
Right back there in your little hidey-hole.
it's your little hiding spot.
Hidey-hole.
it's your little hiding spot.
yeah, get in your hidey-hole.
it's your little hiding spot.
yeah, get in your hidey-hole.
it's bride-and-go-seek.
yeah, get in your hidey-hole.
it's bride-and-go-seek.
oh! it's bride-and-go-seek.
oh! hey, all right! oh! hey, all right! nice, man! hey, all right! nice, man! I came to play! nice, man! I came to play! don't -- don't encourage him.
I came to play! don't -- don't encourage him.
[ laughs .]
don't -- don't encourage him.
[ laughs .]
fun-tastic.
[ laughs .]
fun-tastic.
[ laughter .]
Fun-tastic.
[ laughter .]
[ laughing .]
yeah, buddy.
[ laughter .]
[ laughing .]
yeah, buddy.
Get on in there.
[ laughing .]
yeah, buddy.
Get on in there.
[ laughter .]
Get on in there.
[ laughter .]
yeah! [ laughter .]
yeah! perfect.
yeah! perfect.
there she is.
perfect.
there she is.
I don't even think I can have there she is.
I don't even think I can have it any looser, because it's I don't even think I can have it any looser, because it's gonna fall.
It any looser, because it's gonna fall.
I'll bring the seamstress out Gonna fall.
I'll bring the seamstress out and see if she can take a look, I'll bring the seamstress out and see if she can take a look, okay? And see if she can take a look, okay? okay.
All right.
Thank you.
Okay? okay.
All right.
Thank you.
be right back.
[ laughter .]
everything fitting okay? oh, my god.
You scared me.
everything fitting okay? oh, my god.
You scared me.
[ laughter .]
oh, my god.
You scared me.
[ laughter .]
why are you? [ laughter .]
why are you? um Why are you? um "have you seen my pants?" um "have you seen my pants?" have you seen a pair of "have you seen my pants?" have you seen a pair of pants? have you seen a pair of pants? no.
Pants? no.
I, uhI got to get my no.
I, uhI got to get my pants.
I, uhI got to get my pants.
okay.
[ laughter .]
[ ding! .]
hi.
[ ding! .]
hi.
hi.
I'm joe.
hi.
hi.
I'm joe.
ashley.
ashley.
ashley, nice to meet you.
Hey, man.
, nice to meet you.
hi.
hi.
who are you? who are you? fiancé.
fiancé.
oh, fiancé.
Nice.
oh, fiancé.
Nice.
Congratulations, guys.
Congratulations, guys.
joe, did you put on a spray joe, did you put on a spray tan? Tan? [ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
you look like an you look like an oompa loompa.
Oompa loompa.
you look like snooki.
you look like snooki.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
joe, slide him out.
joe, slide him out.
Ask him about the bachelor Ask him about the bachelor party.
Party.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
did you do the bachelor party did you do the bachelor party yet? Yet? Not yet? Not yet? So, what have you got planned? So, what have you got planned? Vegas.
Vegas.
start to talk about what goes start to talk about what goes down at bachelor parties.
Down at bachelor parties.
[ laughs .]
[ laughs .]
I had mine in vegas.
I had mine in vegas.
I went down to -- we stayed at I went down to -- we stayed at the spearmint rhino.
The spearmint rhino.
nice.
nice.
sick.
sick.
"I know a guy who can get "I know a guy who can get you" You" I know a guy if you need I know a guy if you need somebody.
Somebody.
Pop bottles all night.
Pop bottles all night.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
he doesn't want to talk about he doesn't want to talk about it.
It.
"went to a restaurant, had a "went to a restaurant, had a peach cobbler -- blew my balls Peach cobbler -- blew my balls off.
" Off.
" there's a restaurant there there's a restaurant there that's got a peach cobbler That's got a peach cobbler that'll blow your balls off.
That'll blow your balls off.
[ laughs .]
[ laughs .]
oh.
Nice.
oh.
Nice.
"so you know where to find "so you know where to find the best hooker.
" The best hooker.
" [ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
so you know the turf, yeah, so you know the turf, yeah, you know all the right spots, You know all the right spots, where to get all the best Where to get all the best hookers and stuff.
Hookers and stuff.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
the guy wants to be nowhere the guy wants to be nowhere near him.
Near him.
joey, go back to the guy and joey, go back to the guy and ask, "you got a hotel-room Ask, "you got a hotel-room suite, lot of room?" Suite, lot of room?" you getting a suite, or you getting a suite, or everybody's getting their own Everybody's getting their own room? Room? Oh, you can't talk about it now? Oh, you can't talk about it now? Okay.
Okay.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
I think this is the most I think this is the most uncomfortable situation we've ever had.
Uncomfortable situation we've ever had.
this is crazy.
Ever had.
this is crazy.
"you like peach cobbler?" this is crazy.
"you like peach cobbler?" [ laughter .]
"you like peach cobbler?" [ laughter .]
are you a peach-cobbler guy? [ laughter .]
are you a peach-cobbler guy? no.
are you a peach-cobbler guy? no.
[ laughs .]
no.
[ laughs .]
it's how disgusted the guy is [ laughs .]
it's how disgusted the guy is with joe that is, like, making It's how disgusted the guy is with joe that is, like, making it for me.
joe, "gross.
" [ laughter .]
gross.
[ laughter .]
gross.
[ laughter .]
gross.
[ laughter .]
you want to make him lose [ laughter .]
you want to make him lose right now? you want to make him lose right now? yes, I do.
Right now? yes, I do.
joe, let's see you do this.
yes, I do.
joe, let's see you do this.
Turn to the bride and ask her, joe, let's see you do this.
Turn to the bride and ask her, "what style was your first Turn to the bride and ask her, "what style was your first wedding dress?" "what style was your first wedding dress?" [ laughter, groaning .]
Wedding dress?" [ laughter, groaning .]
[ laughter .]
[ laughter, groaning .]
[ laughter .]
now, this one's flowy.
[ laughter .]
now, this one's flowy.
[ laughter .]
now, this one's flowy.
[ laughter .]
oh, we got him.
[ laughter .]
oh, we got him.
[ buzzer .]
oh, I don't like this.
This whole room is giving me This whole room is giving me the The [ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
q, you were actually engaged q, you were actually engaged a long, long time ago.
A long, long time ago.
I was.
I was.
I was engaged a long time ago.
I was engaged a long time ago.
She sobered up.
She sobered up.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
what's your thoughts on the what's your thoughts on the girl proposing to you? Girl proposing to you? pass.
pass.
[ laughter .]
hi.
How are you? [ laughter .]
hi.
How are you? hi.
Good.
How are you? hi.
How are you? hi.
Good.
How are you? good.
hi.
Good.
How are you? good.
dude, get caught squeezing good.
dude, get caught squeezing the boobs.
dude, get caught squeezing the boobs.
[ laughter .]
The boobs.
[ laughter .]
yeah! [ laughter .]
yeah! did you see that look? Yeah! did you see that look? oh, you look -- oh! did you see that look? oh, you look -- oh! [ laughter .]
[ laughter continues .]
hey.
Oh, wow! thank you.
hey.
Oh, wow! thank you.
are you the bride? thank you.
are you the bride? I am.
are you the bride? I am.
and are you the maid of I am.
and are you the maid of honor? and are you the maid of honor? no.
I didn't get picked.
Honor? no.
I didn't get picked.
oh, you didn't get picked? no.
I didn't get picked.
oh, you didn't get picked? the bride [bleep.]
up.
oh, you didn't get picked? the bride [bleep.]
up.
[ laughing .]
whoa! the bride [bleep.]
up.
[ laughing .]
whoa! together: Oh! [ laughing .]
whoa! together: Oh! "why not? together: Oh! "why not? What happened with you two?" "why not? What happened with you two?" [ laughter .]
What happened with you two?" [ laughter .]
why, uh, why -- why not? [ laughter .]
why, uh, why -- why not? What happened with you two? why, uh, why -- why not? What happened with you two? she -- she's marrying my What happened with you two? she -- she's marrying my ex-boyfriend.
she -- she's marrying my ex-boyfriend.
oh! Ex-boyfriend.
oh! what?! oh! what?! whoa! what?! whoa! is this an episode of whoa! is this an episode of "jerry springer"? is this an episode of "jerry springer"? [ laughs .]
"jerry springer"? [ laughs .]
but you're in the wedding [ laughs .]
but you're in the wedding party.
but you're in the wedding party.
I am, yeah.
Party.
I am, yeah.
she made the cut.
I am, yeah.
she made the cut.
yeah, she made the cut.
she made the cut.
yeah, she made the cut.
That's incredible.
yeah, she made the cut.
That's incredible.
"oh, this is -- that's gonna That's incredible.
"oh, this is -- that's gonna be interesting, then, at the "oh, this is -- that's gonna be interesting, then, at the wedding.
" Be interesting, then, at the wedding.
" well, this is gonna be Wedding.
" well, this is gonna be interesting, then, at the well, this is gonna be interesting, then, at the wedding.
Interesting, then, at the wedding.
'cause that means two people Wedding.
'cause that means two people have seen the groom's wiener.
'cause that means two people have seen the groom's wiener.
'cause -- mm.
Have seen the groom's wiener.
'cause -- mm.
[ laughter .]
'cause -- mm.
[ laughter .]
oh, my god! [ laughter .]
oh, my god! 'cause why? oh, my god! 'cause why? good luck! Try that! 'cause why? good luck! Try that! 'cause good luck! Try that! 'cause [ laughs .]
'cause [ laughs .]
you want to just take the [ laughs .]
you want to just take the loss now? you want to just take the loss now? 'cause if you Loss now? 'cause if you [ laughter .]
'cause if you [ laughter .]
it means that two of you have [ laughter .]
it means that two of you have seen it means that two of you have seen [ laughter .]
Seen [ laughter .]
The groom's [ laughter .]
The groom's thingumajiggy.
The groom's thingumajiggy.
[ laughter .]
thingumajiggy.
[ laughter .]
I didn't marry him for a reason.
[ laughter .]
I didn't marry him for a reason.
[ laughter .]
I didn't marry him for a reason.
[ laughter .]
[ ding! .]
[ laughter .]
[ ding! .]
narrator: Joe got cold feet, [ ding! .]
narrator: Joe got cold feet, so he's running away to the narrator: Joe got cold feet, so he's running away to the loser board.
So he's running away to the loser board.
today, we are competing Loser board.
today, we are competing head-to-head as professional today, we are competing head-to-head as professional fragrance makers, showing off Head-to-head as professional fragrance makers, showing off our cologne's new ad campaign.
the goal is to convince a roomful of strangers that our ad Roomful of strangers that our ad campaign is the tops.
Campaign is the tops.
the catch is that we have no the catch is that we have no idea what the fragrances are Idea what the fragrances are because they've been made by the Because they've been made by the other guys.
Other guys.
at the end, we'll ask the at the end, we'll ask the group to vote for whose Group to vote for whose fragrance campaign is the best.
Fragrance campaign is the best.
Whoever gets the fewest votes Whoever gets the fewest votes loses.
Loses.
[ sniffs .]
[ sniffs .]
you smell that? You smell that? what is it? what is it? smells like victory.
smells like victory.
oh! oh! oh, sorry, guys.
That was me.
oh, sorry, guys.
That was me.
I had chipotle.
I had chipotle.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
all right, brother.
all right, brother.
You ready? You ready? ready to sell some scents.
ready to sell some scents.
I'm feeling pretty good.
I'm feeling pretty good.
I'm feeling, like, in a I'm feeling, like, in a bull[bleep.]
type of mood.
Bull[bleep.]
type of mood.
yeah? yeah? the two smelliest friends we the two smelliest friends we have are about to go Have are about to go head-to-head.
Head-to-head.
I'm not a smelly friend.
I'm not a smelly friend.
[ laughs .]
[ laughs .]
hey, hey! hey, hey! What's going on, guys? how's everybody doing? What's going on, guys? how's everybody doing? hello, and welcome -- welcome how's everybody doing? hello, and welcome -- welcome in.
hello, and welcome -- welcome in.
we work for a In.
we work for a cologne-and-perfume company -- a we work for a cologne-and-perfume company -- a fragrance company -- and we have Cologne-and-perfume company -- a fragrance company -- and we have new scents that are going out to Fragrance company -- and we have new scents that are going out to market, and what we're doing New scents that are going out to market, and what we're doing here is we are workshopping the Market, and what we're doing here is we are workshopping the campaign, just getting your Here is we are workshopping the campaign, just getting your honest feedback.
Campaign, just getting your honest feedback.
So, uh, we have two fragrances.
Honest feedback.
So, uh, we have two fragrances.
[ laughter .]
So, uh, we have two fragrances.
[ laughter .]
what is it, sal? [ laughter .]
what is it, sal? uh, ee-ver com-pon-sah.
what is it, sal? uh, ee-ver com-pon-sah.
[ laughter .]
uh, ee-ver com-pon-sah.
[ laughter .]
this is, uh, a smell from [ laughter .]
this is, uh, a smell from France -- a fragrance from This is, uh, a smell from France -- a fragrance from France.
France -- a fragrance from France.
UhWe sell it in very, very France.
UhWe sell it in very, very small portions, but it has a UhWe sell it in very, very small portions, but it has a veryHuge appeal.
Small portions, but it has a veryHuge appeal.
[ laughs .]
VeryHuge appeal.
[ laughs .]
she knows what's talking [ laughs .]
she knows what's talking about.
she knows what's talking about.
uh, here we have, uh About.
uh, here we have, uh [ laughter .]
uh, here we have, uh [ laughter .]
Mother's musk.
[ laughter .]
Mother's musk.
oh! Mother's musk.
oh! what is more beautiful and oh! what is more beautiful and more natural than motherhood? what is more beautiful and more natural than motherhood? The first smell that you smell More natural than motherhood? The first smell that you smell when you come into this world is The first smell that you smell when you come into this world is your mother's musk.
When you come into this world is your mother's musk.
oh, god.
Your mother's musk.
oh, god.
she's got perfume in her oh, god.
she's got perfume in her uterus.
she's got perfume in her uterus.
oh, no, it's a marketing Uterus.
oh, no, it's a marketing tool.
oh, no, it's a marketing tool.
I mean, come on, it's not like Tool.
I mean, come on, it's not like we're putting a little bit of I mean, come on, it's not like we're putting a little bit of placenta in each bottle We're putting a little bit of placenta in each bottle You know, which we tested.
Placenta in each bottle You know, which we tested.
That didn't work out.
You know, which we tested.
That didn't work out.
[ laughter .]
That didn't work out.
[ laughter .]
maybe if I tell you about the [ laughter .]
maybe if I tell you about the commercial.
Maybe if I tell you about the commercial.
A mother is giving birth, and -- Commercial.
A mother is giving birth, and -- and -- and the doctor is in A mother is giving birth, and -- and -- and the doctor is in front of her, delivering, and And -- and the doctor is in front of her, delivering, and instead of a baby, out comes a Front of her, delivering, and instead of a baby, out comes a handHolding a perfume bottle.
Instead of a baby, out comes a handHolding a perfume bottle.
[ spectators groan, laugh .]
HandHolding a perfume bottle.
[ spectators groan, laugh .]
oh, my god! [ spectators groan, laugh .]
oh, my god! and the doctor holds it up oh, my god! and the doctor holds it up and then sprays some on and then and the doctor holds it up and then sprays some on and then goes out to a play.
And then sprays some on and then goes out to a play.
[ laughs .]
Goes out to a play.
[ laughs .]
that is not a good ad [ laughs .]
that is not a good ad campaign.
that is not a good ad campaign.
[ laughter .]
Campaign.
[ laughter .]
and not a lot of people are [ laughter .]
and not a lot of people are gonna relate to that.
And not a lot of people are gonna relate to that.
Can you relate to a fine suit, a Gonna relate to that.
Can you relate to a fine suit, a handsome gentleman, and a nice Can you relate to a fine suit, a handsome gentleman, and a nice car? Handsome gentleman, and a nice car? You sure can.
Car? You sure can.
With ew-ver com-pon-sah -- You sure can.
With ew-ver com-pon-sah -- overcompensate? With ew-ver com-pon-sah -- overcompensate? what? overcompensate? what? [ laughter .]
what? [ laughter .]
overcompensate? [ laughter .]
overcompensate? ew-ver com-pon-sah.
overcompensate? ew-ver com-pon-sah.
overcompensate.
ew-ver com-pon-sah.
overcompensate.
Tiny package, big smell? overcompensate.
Tiny package, big smell? it's not just for guys with Tiny package, big smell? it's not just for guys with little [bleep.]
it's not just for guys with little [bleep.]
it's for everybody.
Little [bleep.]
it's for everybody.
It's for all [bleep.]
It's for everybody.
It's for all [bleep.]
[ laughter .]
It's for all [bleep.]
[ laughter .]
by a show of hands, how many of [ laughter .]
by a show of hands, how many of you think the ew-ver com-pon-sah By a show of hands, how many of you think the ew-ver com-pon-sah ad campaign is the better You think the ew-ver com-pon-sah ad campaign is the better campaign? Ad campaign is the better campaign? oh, let's see.
Campaign? oh, let's see.
Wha-- oh! oh, let's see.
Wha-- oh! nine! Wha-- oh! nine! [ laughter .]
nine! [ laughter .]
unbeatable.
[ laughter .]
unbeatable.
sorry, I've never had a full unbeatable.
sorry, I've never had a full sweep before.
sorry, I've never had a full sweep before.
[ buzzer .]
Sweep before.
[ buzzer .]
wow.
may the best douche bag win.
what? what? let the best douche bag win.
let the best douche bag win.
You're right.
You're gonna win.
You're right.
You're gonna win.
not funny.
not funny.
[ laughs .]
[ laughs .]
here we go.
Know your colognes.
Here we go.
Know your colognes.
hey, guys.
Welcome.
hey, guys.
Welcome.
hi, everyone.
Come on in.
hi, everyone.
Come on in.
How is everyone doing today? How is everyone doing today? Good? good.
Good? good.
good.
good.
good.
great.
good.
great.
We work for a great.
We work for a perfume-and-cologne company.
We work for a perfume-and-cologne company.
What we want is your opinion on Perfume-and-cologne company.
What we want is your opinion on the marketing campaign behind What we want is your opinion on the marketing campaign behind these scents, okay? The marketing campaign behind these scents, okay? I'll go first.
These scents, okay? I'll go first.
sure.
here we go.
Here we go.
Here's joey.
Here's joey.
ah, yes.
ah, yes.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
yes.
Yes.
Now, this is something to be Now, this is something to be excited about.
Excited about.
This is orphan.
This is orphan.
"foster your essence.
" "foster your essence.
" [ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
"foster your essence.
" "foster your essence.
" puns all up in this bitch.
the thing about orphan is Puns all up in this bitch.
the thing about orphan is where are you gonna end up? the thing about orphan is where are you gonna end up? [ laughter .]
Where are you gonna end up? [ laughter .]
you slap some orphan on you, [ laughter .]
you slap some orphan on you, "where am I gonna end up, in a You slap some orphan on you, "where am I gonna end up, in a millionaire's house?" "where am I gonna end up, in a millionaire's house?" [ laughs .]
Millionaire's house?" [ laughs .]
possibilities are endless.
[ laughs .]
possibilities are endless.
James.
possibilities are endless.
James.
the marketing campaign I'd James.
the marketing campaign I'd like to show you is for a new the marketing campaign I'd like to show you is for a new cologne of ours called Like to show you is for a new cologne of ours called [ laughter .]
Cologne of ours called [ laughter .]
Cropdust.
[ laughter .]
Cropdust.
"just did it.
" Cropdust.
"just did it.
" [ laughter .]
"just did it.
" [ laughter .]
have you ever been walking [ laughter .]
have you ever been walking through a field of hay, and you Have you ever been walking through a field of hay, and you smell that scent of being Through a field of hay, and you smell that scent of being cropdusted? Smell that scent of being cropdusted? [ inhales deeply .]
Cropdusted? [ inhales deeply .]
take it in.
[ inhales deeply .]
take it in.
Take the cropdust in.
Take it in.
Take the cropdust in.
[ laughter .]
Take the cropdust in.
[ laughter .]
orphan's exclusive.
[ laughter .]
orphan's exclusive.
It's an exclusive thing.
orphan's exclusive.
It's an exclusive thing.
You know, they're not giving out It's an exclusive thing.
You know, they're not giving out orphan to everybody.
You know, they're not giving out orphan to everybody.
[ laughter .]
Orphan to everybody.
[ laughter .]
do you know that scent -- [ laughter .]
do you know that scent -- that scent of when you're do you know that scent -- that scent of when you're walking through the countryside That scent of when you're walking through the countryside in a field of wheat or hay or Walking through the countryside in a field of wheat or hay or honey or -- In a field of wheat or hay or honey or -- field of honey? Honey or -- field of honey? [ laughing .]
field of field of honey? [ laughing .]
field of [ laughter .]
[ laughing .]
field of [ laughter .]
uh, I -- I actually grew up on a [ laughter .]
uh, I -- I actually grew up on a farm in kansas, and I remember, Uh, I -- I actually grew up on a farm in kansas, and I remember, back in the day, we'd eat a huge Farm in kansas, and I remember, back in the day, we'd eat a huge meal -- a huge meal -- stuffing, Back in the day, we'd eat a huge meal -- a huge meal -- stuffing, turkey, gravy -- and afterward, Meal -- a huge meal -- stuffing, turkey, gravy -- and afterward, I would go out and cropdust.
Turkey, gravy -- and afterward, I would go out and cropdust.
[ laughter .]
I would go out and cropdust.
[ laughter .]
we would take the plane up, and [ laughter .]
we would take the plane up, and I would cropdust the whole We would take the plane up, and I would cropdust the whole field.
I would cropdust the whole field.
this guy's having no part of Field.
this guy's having no part of it at all.
this guy's having no part of it at all.
[ laughs .]
It at all.
[ laughs .]
the thing about orphan is if [ laughs .]
the thing about orphan is if it doesn't work out, you could the thing about orphan is if it doesn't work out, you could always return it.
It doesn't work out, you could always return it.
[ laughter .]
Always return it.
[ laughter .]
you know, it's not easy to get.
[ laughter .]
you know, it's not easy to get.
[ laughing .]
there's a lot of You know, it's not easy to get.
[ laughing .]
there's a lot of paperwork involved.
[ laughing .]
there's a lot of paperwork involved.
[ laughter .]
what is murray doing? I just cropdusted you.
[ laughter .]
I just cropdusted you.
[ laughter .]
I mean, give it a home, [ laughter .]
I mean, give it a home, people.
I mean, give it a home, people.
It's a good-time smell for a People.
It's a good-time smell for a hard-knock life.
It's a good-time smell for a hard-knock life.
[ laughter .]
Hard-knock life.
[ laughter .]
uh, every bottle of orphan is [ laughter .]
uh, every bottle of orphan is damaged in some way.
uh, every bottle of orphan is damaged in some way.
[ laughter .]
Damaged in some way.
[ laughter .]
by show of hands, how many of [ laughter .]
by show of hands, how many of you like the ad campaign for By show of hands, how many of you like the ad campaign for cropdust? You like the ad campaign for cropdust? One, two, three.
Cropdust? One, two, three.
three.
One, two, three.
three.
okay.
three.
okay.
and, then, by show of hands, okay.
and, then, by show of hands, who likes -- who would like to and, then, by show of hands, who likes -- who would like to love an orphan? Who likes -- who would like to love an orphan? oh! Love an orphan? oh! wow! oh! wow! orphan! wow! orphan! look at that! orphan! look at that! well, thank you for your look at that! well, thank you for your time.
well, thank you for your time.
It's been invaluable.
Time.
It's been invaluable.
[ laughter .]
It's been invaluable.
[ laughter .]
[ buzzer .]
[ laughter .]
[ buzzer .]
narrator: Murr and q couldn't [ buzzer .]
narrator: Murr and q couldn't make sense of their scents, so narrator: Murr and q couldn't make sense of their scents, so they're stinking up the Make sense of their scents, so they're stinking up the loser board.
today, we're in the park, asking strangers to take a Asking strangers to take a selfie with us.
Selfie with us.
except the reason we need to except the reason we need to take that selfie will be given Take that selfie will be given to us by the other guys.
To us by the other guys.
if for any reason you cannot if for any reason you cannot get that picture taken, you Get that picture taken, you lose.
Lose.
let's do it.
let's do it.
hey! every seven years -- you never heard that? -- Your body Never heard that? -- Your body resets.
Resets.
I swear to god.
I swear to god.
We just had this convo.
We just had this convo.
they say your body, your they say your body, your allergies, and your, uh, food Allergies, and your, uh, food tastes change every seven years.
Tastes change every seven years.
hey, guys.
hey, guys.
yeah? yeah? what the [bleep.]
are you what the [bleep.]
are you talking about? Talking about? [ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
q, seven years ago q, seven years ago yeah? What was different about yeah? What was different about you? What was different about you? I was in shape seven years You? I was in shape seven years ago.
I was in shape seven years ago.
Does that count? Ago.
Does that count? well, you were a different Does that count? well, you were a different shape.
well, you were a different shape.
[ laughter .]
Shape.
[ laughter .]
oh! [ laughter .]
oh! oh [bleep.]
oh! oh [bleep.]
oh, your tooth! oh [bleep.]
oh, your tooth! Is that your tooth?! oh, your tooth! Is that your tooth?! Is that your tooth?! Is that your tooth?! Is that your tooth?! Holy [bleep.]
Is that your tooth?! Holy [bleep.]
oh, my god! Holy [bleep.]
oh, my god! His tooth just fell out! Oh, my god! His tooth just fell out! murray's tooth just fell out! His tooth just fell out! murray's tooth just fell out! [ laughs .]
murray's tooth just fell out! [ laughs .]
guys, what the [bleep.]
[ laughs .]
guys, what the [bleep.]
oh, my god! guys, what the [bleep.]
oh, my god! oh, my god! oh, my god! oh, my god! hey, murray.
Murray.
oh, my god! hey, murray.
Murray.
Your body's changing.
hey, murray.
Murray.
Your body's changing.
It's just Your body's changing.
It's just [ laughter .]
It's just [ laughter .]
Just hit seven years.
[ laughter .]
Just hit seven years.
guys, this isn't funny! Just hit seven years.
guys, this isn't funny! it's been seven years! guys, this isn't funny! it's been seven years! my [bleep.]
tooth just came it's been seven years! my [bleep.]
tooth just came out! my [bleep.]
tooth just came out! I got to take -- I got to take Out! I got to take -- I got to take selfies today like this? I got to take -- I got to take selfies today like this? I can't talk right! Selfies today like this? I can't talk right! My tongue is lisping! I can't talk right! My tongue is lisping! I can't [bleep.]
talk! My tongue is lisping! I can't [bleep.]
talk! It's not funny, man! I can't [bleep.]
talk! It's not funny, man! Get a dentist! It's not funny, man! Get a dentist! oh, my god! Get a dentist! oh, my god! there's no way I'm doing a oh, my god! there's no way I'm doing a challenge called "selfies," there's no way I'm doing a challenge called "selfies," ass[bleep.]
Challenge called "selfies," ass[bleep.]
so you're -- so you're gonna Ass[bleep.]
so you're -- so you're gonna take a loss on the challenge? so you're -- so you're gonna take a loss on the challenge? yes! Hell, yeah! Take a loss on the challenge? yes! Hell, yeah! I'm not going out.
yes! Hell, yeah! I'm not going out.
I lose the challenge? Fine.
I'm not going out.
I lose the challenge? Fine.
Let's move on, guys.
I lose the challenge? Fine.
Let's move on, guys.
then you lose the whole Let's move on, guys.
then you lose the whole episode.
then you lose the whole episode.
[ laughter .]
Episode.
[ laughter .]
you do! You do.
if you look at the scoreboard, and then, guys, if Scoreboard, and then, guys, if you're with me on this, I think You're with me on this, I think the punishment is, go out there The punishment is, go out there and take a selfie.
And take a selfie.
[ laughter .]
[ laughter .]
I pride myself on my smile.
[ laughter .]
I pride myself on my smile.
[ laughter .]
you got to go anyway! [ laughter .]
you got to go anyway! come on, man! you got to go anyway! come on, man! That's not right! come on, man! That's not right! This is awful.
That's not right! This is awful.
look at him.
This is awful.
look at him.
Look at that stupid look on his look at him.
Look at that stupid look on his face.
Look at that stupid look on his face.
He cannot stand that people are Face.
He cannot stand that people are gonna see him like this.
He cannot stand that people are gonna see him like this.
[ laughter .]
Gonna see him like this.
[ laughter .]
show that chomper to the [ laughter .]
show that chomper to the world, my friend.
show that chomper to the world, my friend.
Put that hand down.
World, my friend.
Put that hand down.
come on, man.
Put that hand down.
come on, man.
it's a punishment.
come on, man.
it's a punishment.
Get out there and get people to it's a punishment.
Get out there and get people to take selfies.
Get out there and get people to take selfies.
Get the [bleep.]
out there and Take selfies.
Get the [bleep.]
out there and smile with your garage door Get the [bleep.]
out there and smile with your garage door open! Smile with your garage door open! Get out there and smile with the Open! Get out there and smile with the garage door! Get out there and smile with the garage door! guys, please, man.
Garage door! guys, please, man.
excuse me.
guys, please, man.
excuse me.
Do you mind if we take a selfie excuse me.
Do you mind if we take a selfie together? Do you mind if we take a selfie together? I'm trying to get good at it.
Together? I'm trying to get good at it.
oh, no.
I'm trying to get good at it.
oh, no.
d-- no? No? oh, no.
d-- no? No? she saw your tooth.
d-- no? No? she saw your tooth.
[ laughing .]
guys, this is she saw your tooth.
[ laughing .]
guys, this is not funny, man.
[ laughing .]
guys, this is not funny, man.
[ laughs .]
Not funny, man.
[ laughs .]
do you -- do you guys mind -- [ laughs .]
do you -- do you guys mind -- I'm -- I'm a photographer.
do you -- do you guys mind -- I'm -- I'm a photographer.
UmI'm trying to take -- I'm -- I'm a photographer.
UmI'm trying to take -- [ laughing .]
I can't.
UmI'm trying to take -- [ laughing .]
I can't.
Do you mind if we take a selfie [ laughing .]
I can't.
Do you mind if we take a selfie together? Do you mind if we take a selfie together? let's do it.
Together? let's do it.
okay.
Let's take a selfie.
let's do it.
okay.
Let's take a selfie.
One on each side.
okay.
Let's take a selfie.
One on each side.
oh, yeah! One on each side.
oh, yeah! let's take a selfie.
oh, yeah! let's take a selfie.
[ laughs .]
let's take a selfie.
[ laughs .]
[ laughter .]
[ laughs .]
[ laughter .]
[ laughing, whimpering .]
[ laughter .]
[ laughing, whimpering .]
the worst day of my life.
[ laughing, whimpering .]
the worst day of my life.
[ laughter .]
The worst day of my life.
[ laughter .]
all right, bud, keep going.
[ laughter .]
all right, bud, keep going.
do you mind taking a selfie all right, bud, keep going.
do you mind taking a selfie with me? do you mind taking a selfie with me? I'm trying to frame out my With me? I'm trying to frame out my blackened front chomper.
I'm trying to frame out my blackened front chomper.
[ laughter .]
Blackened front chomper.
[ laughter .]
you know? [ laughter .]
you know? So, okay, ready? You know? So, okay, ready? Cheese.
So, okay, ready? Cheese.
Oh [bleep.]
Cheese.
Oh [bleep.]
you can still see my blackened Oh [bleep.]
you can still see my blackened front chomper.
You can still see my blackened front chomper.
[ laughter .]
Front chomper.
[ laughter .]
you want to take a selfie [ laughter .]
you want to take a selfie with me? you want to take a selfie with me? [ laughing .]
oh, my god.
With me? [ laughing .]
oh, my god.
[ whimpering .]
[ laughing .]
oh, my god.
[ whimpering .]
[ laughter .]
[ whimpering .]
[ laughter .]
big smiles.
[ laughter .]
big smiles.
Well, this one, it looks like Big smiles.
Well, this one, it looks like I'm crying.
Well, this one, it looks like I'm crying.
I'm sorry for that.
I'm crying.
I'm sorry for that.
[ laughter .]
I'm sorry for that.
[ laughter .]
murr, get a selfie with this [ laughter .]
murr, get a selfie with this guy holding your tooth.
murr, get a selfie with this guy holding your tooth.
oh, my god.
Guy holding your tooth.
oh, my god.
This is the worst.
oh, my god.
This is the worst.
if you get this, the This is the worst.
if you get this, the punishment is over.
if you get this, the punishment is over.
Come on, precious! Punishment is over.
Come on, precious! [ laughs .]
Come on, precious! [ laughs .]
can I take a picture of you [ laughs .]
can I take a picture of you holding my tooth that fell out? can I take a picture of you holding my tooth that fell out? yeah.
Holding my tooth that fell out? yeah.
oh! No! yeah.
oh! No! Oh, my god! he just took his tooth.
oh! Oh, my god! [ laughter .]
oh! Oh, my god! [ laughter .]
oh, yeah.
That's great.
[ laughter .]
oh, yeah.
That's great.
That's great, man.
oh, yeah.
That's great.
That's great, man.
That's fantastic.
That's great, man.
That's fantastic.
all right.
There we go.
That's fantastic.
all right.
There we go.
every once in a while all right.
There we go.
every once in a while the stars align, and a tooth every once in a while the stars align, and a tooth falls out on the wrong guy.
the stars align, and a tooth falls out on the wrong guy.
[ laughs .]
Falls out on the wrong guy.
[ laughs .]
yeah, yeah.
[ laughs .]
yeah, yeah.
this is not funny.
yeah, yeah.
this is not funny.
I need to go to a dentist.