Gintama (2005) s03e33 Episode Script

[Buwahahaha, a request from your Excellency.
Turn on the room lights and keep your distance from the TV when watching the show.
.]
All right.
Congratulations.
You've passed the job interview.
["Briefs Will Unavoidably Get Skidmarks".]
You have 40 seconds to get ready! I hate dawdlers! I'm busy, too, you know! What? What is this? Looks like Otose has sent over someone quite spirited.
Huh? Those girls weren't any good, but the kid with the glasses wasn't too bad.
He could see spirits, but you can't handle this job if you're susceptible to spiritual possession.
What job are you talking about? Okami, a group has arrived.
Rei, this is Gin, the new guy.
Pound the basics into him.
Gin, don't use your real name here.
Your name is the chain that links you to your body.
If they find out your name, you'll be dragged to the other world.
I've already been dragged into a strange world.
What is this? A different anime? Take this too.
As long as you have this, most spirits will listen to you.
[Persimmons and Peanuts.]
Don't overfeed them! If you understand, then go.
I hate dawdlers! Let's go, Gin.
This way.
Don't talk to me so casually! What are you?! I'm Rei.
Don't get in my way.
Don't talk about spirits.
You're a Stand! Can you really handle this? We're going to have to do business with spiritsI mean, Stands.
With Stands? What do you mean? You were sent here by the Okami's friend to work at this inn, right? The old hag? Yes.
But you need special abilities to work here, so Mrs.
Oiwa was testing your aptitude.
GhostStands come here for the hot springs.
She was testing to see whether you could handle working at this Stand hot spring.
Ginyou were chosen.
A s-s-s-s-s-Stand hot-spring?! Yes.
This area is strongly magnetized, making it easy for Stands to materialize themselves.
It's what you would call a spiritual hot spot where Stands would all gather around.
That old hag! I thought that it was strange for her to let us go to a hot spring.
She sold me out! To a Stand hot spring! We usually get by with Mrs.
Oiwa and several of us assistants, but around this time, a lot of Stands come and we're busy.
We get people like you with an aptitude for Stands.
Wait! I have an aptitude for Stands?! That's impossible! I almost took a crap three times just talking to you.
Oh no.
Again! You don't understand.
The fact that you're talking to me shows that you have an aptitude.
You just feel like taking a crap because you're a loser--no, you're just crappy.
No way.
I don't care! Why do I have to be manipulated by those old hags? I'm going home! To where? We closed off the mountain path by dropping a boulder on it.
And besides, if you run away I myself have "UNO.
" Your friends will have to play UNO forever as "His Excellency.
" Y-You bastards! Rei, could you help me for a moment? Another one! Get used to it already.
Quickly, Rei, that customer is at it again.
Gin, take care of it.
What is that? Who is that Stand? He's just been hitting that wall.
He's creating poltergeists.
I'm so pissed off at Mitsuhide I really can't believe that it's Mitsuhide.
Who is Mitsuhide? Who is that drunk? Nobunaga.
Nobunaga?! That's Nobunaga Oda?! Why is he only wearing briefs?! They're hanging loose on him, too.
He likes to adopt western mannerisms.
Why does he have to wear briefs of all things?! There are lots of other types of western clothes he can wear.
There are a lot better things.
I mean come on, seriously.
Most people wouldn't betray me there.
It was right before I took control of the whole country that I grasp the situation.
Hey, he's totally dwelling on what happened at Honnoji Temple.
It happens every time he comes here.
Gin, do something about it.
What can I do about that drunk? Just do something! Old people like talking to young people.
You should do it.
Hey, I hear something coming from the room next door, too.
What is this? Hey, there's someone else pounding on the walls.
What's going on? Is it some sort of fad? Who is that? Cut it out.
I mean, come on I took down that demon Nobunaga, so let's end it there! It's all right for me to be at the top, right? But nooo, he just had to start making a huge fuss about it that damn Hideyoshi.
It's Mitsuhide! That's definitely Mitsuhide Akechi! This is bad, isn't it?! Two guys who shouldn't meet are in neighboring rooms.
Think about where you put people! And why is he in briefs, too?! He was Nobunaga's subordinate so he was going along.
Naturally, Mitsuhide has tight briefs.
They're clean.
Now's not the time to be talking about that! Something terrible will happen if they meet.
Huh? I hear something coming from the next room.
Again?! Oh, this is really bad.
It's got to be him.
He's got to be Hideyoshi.
I'm going to kill that barber.
Who is he?! And who's this barber he wants to kill? Hideyoshi has to be here! No matter how I think of it, this is the time when Hideyoshi has to come out and badmouth Nobunaga! A three-way standoff should form! That's Xavier.
He's the person who introduced Christianity to Japan.
But his hair style was never popular.
How could it be?! For what kind of pathetic reason is he staying here?! Don't blame things on your barber! Umm, excuse me.
Umm, I'm the person staying across from your room.
But your thumping is really noisy.
I can't sleep.
Could you please keep it quiet? Ah! He's Hideyoshi, isn't he? And anyway, Nobunaga is really annoying.
Don't call me a monkey.
You look like a catfish you know.
You're right! How did you know? That's because his underwear is dirty! It has crap on it! Hideyoshi seems like he'd have a lot on them! Yeah! Now's not the time to be analyzing this--! If the Brief Trio meet Huh? It's been a while.
You two came, too? Yeah.
I haven't seen you in a while.
That's true.
How long has it been? Oh, they're acting unexpectedly normal.
Yep Mitsuhide, the last time we met was Honnoji Temple, right? Really? I don't really remember.
This is bad.
Nobunaga is jumping into matters.
You don't remember? That thing happened? What? You really don't remember? I don't remember.
I was immediately killed afterwards by Sir Hideyoshi.
Oh, really? I did that? I don't remember either.
Besides, Mitsuhide, the fact that you said "afterwards" means that you do remember Honnoji Temple.
By "afterwards" I meant that thing.
I meant after you told me to attack Mohri.
My memory is vague after that.
Hey, what's with this lousy conversation? But Mr.
Mitsuhide, you said that you were also killed.
That means that you knew that Nobunaga was killed.
Anyway, you totally killed him.
I know you did.
Hold on one second, Monkey.
What? Did you just refer to me as just plain Nobunaga? He did.
He's always badmouthing him and it slipped out.
I did, didn't I? Huh? Is there anything wrong with that? He's lashing back.
He's pretty annoying.
My lord, you died, so you may not know this, but I did take control of the whole nation.
That's what happened, so don't call me a monkey, you know? Oh? You took control of the nation.
That's pretty impressivefor a monkey.
Huh? I'm kind of offended by that.
There's no problem in me doing that.
You only took control of the country because you snatched it away from me.
You're the one who snatched it away, weren't you? Besides, it wouldn't have been possible without me.
You want to fight? Bring it on.
I can take you down in one hit.
Anyway, I've already killed you.
But I killed you.
All right, stop right there.
Hold on! Calm down.
Come in.
Welcome to Senbokyo.
I came again.
I couldn't pass on this year as well.
Right this way.
Gin, carry the guest's bags.
Huh?! Oh, okay.
Thank you.
Here.
The year is a waste if I don't get to this hot spring.
Hot springs really bring you back to life.
You're already dead.
Oh no! That's right.
You really like jokes about ghosts, don't you? The hot spring is open at all hours of the day.
You can go in whenever you like.
I can't wait to stretch out my arms and legs in the hot water.
Oh no! That's right.
You really like jokes about ghosts, don't you? This is your room.
Enjoy your stay.
Oh? Gin--?! What are you doing? Bring the guest's bags right now.
Oh, sorry.
Here are your bags.
Please enjoy your stay.
This isn't mine, is it? Hey, you there! Yes, yes, yes, yes Could you help me wash myself? All right.
Right away.
My back is so itchy.
Umm, excuse me, but where is your back? What are you talking about? My back is my back.
Yes.
Your back is your back, isn't it? Huh? Did you hear something strange? Not at all.
I haven't done anything.
Oh! Do you suppose it could be that thing? I might have hummed a little jazz tune! Oh? You like jazz? You've got good taste.
Anyway, get the upper right a little.
Upper right?! What part is the upper right?! Son, imagine a drum set.
Imagine you're hitting the cymbols.
I don't know Jazz.
Is it this area? How rude! What are you touching? That's my "C" Huh? Huh? What? Huh? "C?!" It's on the side of your face! Why would you have a "C" on the side of your face? You're quite the wild performer.
You looked like you were going for the cymbals, but you went for the "C" instead.
I've never seen such an extempore performance.
I'm going back to my room.
I want to put this feeling to music.
Wait a second! Your body's all like this! It's jazzed up.
Yes.
It's jazzed up.
That's why I want to write it down.
Hold on! Hold on! It looks like you weren't what I expected you would be like.
Complaints have been pouring in.
How will you clear this up, Gin? Well, I think I tried pretty hard.
I don't like Stands, but I even washed their backs.
Let me go already.
Don't be such a spoiled brat! When you work, you're judged by your results! If your hard work doesn't produce any results, there's no point, you good-for-nothing! Who the hell do you think you are, talking so big to me, you Peanut Bastard! I'm not scared anymore! After working here, I've gotten used to Stands.
I'm not afraid of you anymore.
I'm sorry for getting carried away! Just leave it at that, dear.
We need the help.
He's better than nothing.
You don't have to deal with guests anymore, Gin.
Go to the back and do some routine chores.
We have an important guest tomorrow.
The Light of the East, the former Great Gongen, Prince Ieyasu Tokugawa, is coming to our hot spring.
The rating of this hot spring will drop if someone like you were to appear before him.
You stay quiet.
I have "UNO.
" Not good enough.
I have a "draw four.
" I also have a "draw four.
" I never expected you to have such a trick up your sleeve.
Why? Why must this happen to me? Did I do something wrong?! I'm forced to work in some inn for Stands, I'm told I'm useless, and I'm tired, but I can't sleep because of them playing UNO every single night.
If that weren't bad enough, I've been living on Kaki-pea.
This treatment I can't take it anymore.
I can't stay quiet.
I'm going to do it.
"His Excellency" and crap don't matter anymore.
I'm going to crush this hot spring inn! That look.
I've been waiting for that look.
Rei When we first met, I knew that you were the man who would start a revolution at this hot spring inn.
We Stands are worked off like a horse for small wages while the Okami gets rich.
I'm sick of doing things her way.
Gin, from what I can see, you have the potential of a Stand user to rivals that of the Okami.
I'll become your Stand.
So let's start a revolution at this hot spring inn.
Can we win against the Okami's Stand? Tagosaku is the strongest Stand in Senbokyo.
He's the Okami's husband who passed away ten years ago.
Even after he passed away, he formed a team with the Okami and they've controlled Senbokyo.
The ordinary Stands and I can't take them on even if we grouped together.
But we need evil spirits to fight evil spirits.
Awaken.
Heroic spirits who have left their mark on history Now is the time to awaken.
Turn your desire for revenge into a blade and rise up now.
Brief Trio.
Good morning, Nobunaga, Mitsuhide, and Hideyoshi.
Who the hell are you? Ieyasu is here.
Listen, Nobunaga Hideyoshi, Mitsuhide Do exactly what I told you to do yesterday.
Play a lot of nasty tricks on Ieyasu and ruin his welcome.
The rating of this inn will crash into the ground and the inn will be destroyed.
You got that? Hey, are you listening? Hey! You want to fight? What did you say? Come to the bathrooms later.
Let's do it right now.
Right here.
Hey! I told you not to fight anymore! Come on.
I'll give you some peanuts.
I know that a lot happened in your pasts, but you can't move forward if you keep looking back.
Forget everything for today.
Let's forget all about Honnoji Temple.
Just focus on Ieyasu.
He took control of the nation after you guys weren't around, even though he was the least remarkable of any of you.
Your true enemy is Ieyasu! Okay?! All right! Then let's do this.
Let's all apologize to each other.
Let's call it all even.
Okay? Come on.
Okay? My lordI'm sorry for betraying you.
That's good! Good job, Mitsuhide! The one who apologized first is the most admirable! And you forgive them, Nobunaga.
It's all right.
It didn't really bother me.
That's good! You did well, too, Nobunaga! It's pretty hard to forgive the person who killed you.
Hey, what are you doing, Hideyoshi? Hurry up and apologize to Mitsuhide! I don't want to.
I didn't do anything wrong.
I just killed Sir Akechi to avenge my lord.
What's wrong with this guy? He's really annoying.
Grasp the situation.
You even have crap on your underwear! Fine.
Then I take back my forgiveness.
Look at that, Hideyoshi! This is your fault.
You even have skidmarks on your underwear.
I don't want to.
Then apologize to me for calling me a monkey.
What's wrong with calling a monkey a monkey, Monkey? Aw, Nobunaga, you mustn't lay hands on him.
Or your feet.
I told you to stop.
Here.
Some peanuts.
It looks like it'll be difficult for them to make up.
Oh well.
They'll come around.
Anyway, keep watch over the bath.
Everyone becomes defenseless in the bath.
A surprise attack, huh? It reminds me of Honnoji Temple.
No, Okehazama.
Anyway, you really aren't sorry, are you? "It reminds me of Honnoji Temple".
I don't want to remember that.
Shh Be quiet! Hey, someone's come.
It's Ieyasu! That's Ieyasu.
There's no mistake.
Look at that.
As expected, the underwear of the guy who took control of the nation is really something else.
He's wearing boxers.
His underwear is one grade higher than yours, fashion-wise! On that note, your underwear is dirty.
It's no wonder you couldn't control the nation.
I took control of the nation.
There's nothing for you to take.
Clean the crap off of your butt before you take control of the nation, stupid.
Gin, there he goes.
What should we do? Hideyoshi.
Yes? Switch your crappy underwear with the boxers that Ieyasu took off.
Are you serious? I don't want the underwear that an old guy like that wore.
The guy who'll wear your underwear will hate it ten thousand times more.
Wait.
It's not fair for only Hideyoshi to get boxers.
I'll go.
What are you doing?! We don't need your somewhat clean underwear.
No, I will No, I will No, I will You're fighting over some old guy's underwear.
That's gross! Gin, Ieyasu has gone into the tub.
All right! Charge.
Go fart in the tub.
Are you serious? Give us a break.
I got some nice boxers.
Do I have to get them soiled already? They're already soiled.
There's a streak of crap on it.
How dirty is your butt anyway? Hello.
The water's nice, isn't it? It sure is.
Listen.
Do it together when I count to five.
Do it with the expectation to bear fruit.
Got it? Five Four Three Two One.
I-Impossible This is Brief Trio, you've double-crossed me Gin! Rei, it's not good to have extravagant delusions and swindle men.
Do you want the man you love to die instantly? Too bad, boy.
The Brief Trio have been under my control for quite some time now.
Don't think I'm your ordinary Stand user.
If you make enemies with me You're pretty much fighting this whole village.
If you want to defeat me, you need the help of the most powerful Stand.
But that's impossible.
There isn't anyone in Senbokyo who will help you.
I'm going to have you work here until you die.
The most powerful Stand.
The most powerful ally.
Such a person Huh? What are you doing here? Are you awake? You stink.
What is that smell? A fart? They're right before me.
[To be continued.]
[Next week, Gintoki.]
[counterattacks!!.]
The next episode: "Gin and His Excellency's Good-for-nothings.
" [Gin's requiem reverberates throughout the demonic inn where spirits gather!.]
[And finally, a direct confrontation with Tagosaku, the most powerful Stand?!.]