Gintama (2005) s03e36 Episode Script

Before Thinking About the Earth, Think About the More Endangered Gintaman's Future!

Uho.
Wasn't that shot sorta long for just "Uho"? [SHUEISHA.]
Daitooo! Hey, you! There's no way I can approve a dirty story idea like this! You can't jump into the gutter just because you ran out of decent ideas! What're you tryin' to pull?! What? You're trying to use smut to cover up a bad story, aren't you? But I can easily see you've reached the limit of your abilities! You've got no depth at all! Daito, please! Please don't frustrate me.
My hair is falling out because of you! I can't tell people I part my hair in the middle anymore! You hear me?! Look over there! That's Konishi, who was doing your job before! He became an efficient editor, and is now in charge of the mega-hit manga, "One Park"! When he was in charge, "Gintaman" was a well-known battle manga and it laid the foundations for JUMP.
But look at you! Who the hell are you? You're just some big guy, but people like you usually have small peckers.
But you have a big pecker! Even that pisses me off! Listen! If your next survey scores the lowest, like this time, Daito, you and your services on "Gintaman" will no longer be needed for JUMP! How did things get like this? Why do I have to languish like this? I used to be in charge of a manga about girls who played American football, called "Paishield.
" That was a big hit.
Murara Sensei always gave me his manuscripts three days before the deadline, even though I didn't ask.
I had always scored high in reader surveys.
I won't let you do that! But then for some reason, I was switched to another manga.
And now, I'm working on small-time manga like this.
I didn't know what was wrong.
I didn't want to know what had happened to me.
Aw crap, "Gintaman" is still in this week's issue.
I can't believe it.
It's jumped the shark.
I wonder what the editor is thinking.
No way.
Even if they put some effort into it, it's hopeless.
It's always in the lineup before "Nyaga-san.
" Man, I sure hate seeing JUMP slide like this.
While I was an advisor for "Gintaman," I made it a great battle manga that was a pillar of JUMP.
But it's really lost its edge.
Um Huh? Could I ask you a few questions? I see.
Now you're in charge of "Gintaman.
" What happened to that guy I called Shorty who thought he was an otaku.
You mean Konishi.
He's in charge of "One Park.
" Wow, he is? It sounds like he's really risen in life.
I remember he was always worried about getting fired back then.
He treated Konishi like a rookie editor?! It means the rumor that someone else was the real engineer behind the success of Gintaman was correct.
I'm not worthy! Please help me! ["Before Worrying about the Earth, Think About the Even More Endangered Future of 'Gintaman'".]
You can't just call and expect me to come anymore.
Konishi! I'm sorry, but thank you for coming.
You should be thankful! I hardly have any time since I started working on "One Park.
" You should know that.
All these meetings, parties, dating parties and more dating parties.
Mainly dating parties.
I've moved on from "Gintaman" - that's a manga for the masses.
Can you tell me how many millions of magazines "Gintaman" sold in its first edition? Can you? Tell me! M-Millions? Not thousands or? No.
It's at least two million, like One Park! More likeze-zero point million.
Uho.
Thanks for inviting me.
Koishi Sensei! I'm glad you could come! Hey.
Long time, no see! What?! What's he doing here? Well Yo! Y-You are? Gintoki! Now that you're here, anything is possible.
I owed you one, so showing up was the least I could do for you.
So everybody's here.
Hey, Shorty! Long time no see.
WellWho are you? What are you talking about? Don't tell me you've forgotten my face.
Say "Dondake?!" As you know, "Gintaman" has been losing its popularity lately.
So I'd like to ask for your help in boosting it back up.
I'd appreciate your support.
Uho! But "Gintaman" ran out of battles, it's past its peak.
I don't think an extension is possible.
You say that, but you the one who turned it into a battle manga on a par with "Dragon Bose!" Listen! The manga in JUMP all turn battle manga before they end! That's destiny! But it's not always like that! Well, it depends on the story.
Hey, please calm down, you two.
Who are you? This is Koishi Sensei.
He wrote and illustrated "Maison de Gin-Gin" and now works on "Asokomarudashi.
" I see.
I heard you worked as a cashier in your hometown for a while.
Anyway, what are you doing here? You know, I'm a revival man, so I thought he needed someone like me to revive "Gintaman"! I'm outta here.
Oh, no! Please wait, Koishi Sensei! Uho! Hey, I was just kidding.
I really liked your manga! Especially that report manga! Hey, don't mention that one! So Cheers! Well, I'm kicking off our meeting about "Gintaman's" future.
Does anyone have any ideas? I said, stop taking pieces of chicken off the skewer! But you can't taste the real yakitori without the skewer.
Understand? Um Any ideas? Nah, this is how you enjoy yakitori! I think everyone want to try all kinds of food.
I don't need that kind of advice! Ideas? Yakitori is yakitori whether it's on skewer or not.
What if yakitori came in a tube.
Then it wouldn't be yakitori anymore, would it? Tube! Tube! Tube! Stop talking about the tube! Focus on the meeting! So, what should we talk about first? Let's first talk about what the issue is with "Gintaman.
" All right.
There's no question that "Gintaman" has too much dirty language.
And the illustrations are crude! Uho Well, those are just basic issues.
How can I explain it? In a word, what is "Gintaman" lacking? That's it! I know the answer.
What "Gintaman" doesn't have is sex! Sex? The women in "Gintaman" are all violent characters.
Ginta shrinks and jumps right between her giant boobs.
So it needs another character, some sexy woman.
Ah ha! "Gintaman" didn't have the ingredients for a heroine! That's it! Uho! All right, let's figure out the details of this heroine.
Uho! You got any ideas? Uho uho.
Great! What did he say? Please translate for me.
He said, giant boobs! Hey! Why did it take him so long just to say that? And the heroine is Gintaman's childhood friend.
We need to have this kind of traditional setting.
I like a fair-skinned girl from the snow country.
How about a sporty girl, just like "Paishield"? She belongs to the basketball club, and she wears sleeveless shirts! Does that sound sexy or what? That's why you can't sell a million magazines.
Give it a rest, you idiot! You talk like you're a big man, but the real big man is Yoda Sensei! Not you! What?! Hey, hey.
Calm down, both of you! How about a girl who speaks with a Hakata accent? Well, do you have any good ideas? Uho? Ginta! Ginta! Hey, Ginta! He's still sleeping?! Wake up! Ow! Hey, you! What do you mean, "hey you"? I came in here ta wake ya up! I'm saying: Don't come into my room without asking! Whatevs.
You'll be late fer school if ya don't hurry! It's not time yet! Whateva! Get up! This is Mikako Nakajima.
She lives next door and she's always poking her nose in my business.
[This window is for you.]
Hurry, hurry! If we're late for school, it'll be yer fault! Ginta, can I ask ya a favor? What's that? Can ya come and watch my basketball game today? Can you? If I have time.
Really?! I'm so happy! Hey, stop it! It's dangerous! Sit back! We don't have much time left.
We made it to the finals, but This is it.
All of you, let's not give up! We never give up! Let's play our best! All right! Wow! Great! Mikako! We did it! Ginta.
Uho What! Is that all?! Hey, stupid gorilla! Part 1 had a terrible ending! I didn't understand it at all! That's not a good way to head into the commercials! Uho.
Did everyone see that? The story is too cliche! We're gonna need something a lot better than that to make it great! Well, how about putting a handwarmer on her chest? Forget about the snow country! Yes! How about twins? But "Gintaman" already had twins who were mediums.
Their names were Ipa and Nema.
So, what about a set of 48 sisters? Uho?! It's very important to have an impact! Akimoto always does it and it works for him! You're straying off the subject.
I don't care! You guys, I want to hear more ideas with impact.
How about that heroine who is a divorcee with one kid? That's good! I get really excited about female dentists.
I love it! She cooks fish and is a real family girl.
Sounds great! She's good at mimicking voices.
Wonderful! She can't hold her liquor! Awesome! Her dream is to be a bride! Cool! She looks pretty! Great! A bus driver! Swell! Wow! I'm stuffed to the gills! We beat these ideas to death! "Gintaman" will be secure! Right, Amachi? Uho But to sell a million copies, it'll all depends on how you put it all together.
No problem.
Because there's a character called Amanto.
I see.
If you get stuck, that's a good excuse to use Amanto! Then we're going home! Good luck, Amachi Sensei.
Okay, let's go somewhere else! Let's go to a cabaret club! Great idea! [Odd Jobs Office.]
Boss! I need to get paid! When can I get my paycheck? Dondake! Be quiet.
My stomach and my back will be one and the same soon! Come on! Pay up! Feed me! Dondake! Okay, okay.
You can take anything here to a pawnshop.
What's with all this junk! Even if I take these to the flea market, nobody will buy them.
Dondake! This is my childhood photo album! Oh! That's Mikako Nakajima.
She lived next door.
I bet she's a beautiful woman now.
[My best childhood friend.
.]
[MIND YOUR SUGAR LEVELS.]
You love sweets, don't you boss? Your teeth are gonna rot if you keep eating that stuff.
Dondake! Shut up! Leave me alone.
Ouch! My tooth hurts! See, I told you.
I heard a new dentist just opened up nearby.
According to rumors, she's really good-looking.
Dondake! Ouch.
Here it is.
What are ya doing? Open yer mouth wide.
Ah Don't move! Okay, you can rinse yer mouth.
Long time, no see, Ginta.
Huh?! Ya don't recognize me? It's me! You'reMikako Nakajima? [Bar Olivia.]
Ya still love sweets, doncha? Just the way ya were.
I haven't seen you for ten years.
Really? But ten years went by in a flash.
Give me another.
Are you sure you can handle all that? Don't worry.
But what a coincidence that you opened your dental clinic in this town.
That's not exactly right.
It's not a coincidence.
What?! In fact, I'm traveling around, looking fer someone.
Someone? Yeah.
I feel like I'm drunk.
H-Hey! That's why I asked you.
To tell ya the truth, I can't drink.
But I can cook fish.
And I do good impressions of other people.
Haven't the kids eaten yet? See, did I sound like him? Y-Yeah.
But I have to go back home soon.
Back home? I finally found you, but Ginta! I'm glad you could come! I'm here because you asked.
What? I'm sorry I'm late.
Nothing.
I'm so happy.
Ginta, you're not cold? Here you go.
A handwarmer.
Thank you.
It's time ta say good-bye.
Yeahbut we'll see each other again.
No, we won't.
What? Then What do you mean we won't see each other again? Icame because I wanted to see you.
I liked you.
Take this.
Take care of yourself.
Can I come with you? Come this way, Ginta! I have someone ta introduce ya to! Someone? This is my twin sister, Mitsuko! Tw-Twins?! Mom! Mom?! Where have you been? I'm sorry, Hiroshi.
I didn't mean to leave ya alone.
Hiroshi?! I'm a divorcee.
A divorcee?! Ah! Why is this train flying in space?! I'm an Amanto from the Planet of the Giant Boobs.
I came to Earth in order to find my best childhood friend.
What?! It's time for the final battle! Oh! It's either them or us.
There can be only one winner! Let's settle this once and for all! Oh! Um Yes? Who are they? We're from the Planet of the Giant Boobs And they're from Planet Flat Chest.
We're sister planets! Planet Flat Chest?! Go! Mikako, here! Bring it on! Then, this is the final attack! Once again, Ginta brings peace to the universe.
Thank you, Ginta.
Good-bye, "Gintaman.
" Whatever [Preview.]
[Ugyaaaaaaaaaah!!.]
[Too late!!.]
[See you again next time!.]

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