Phineas and Ferb s04e01 Episode Script
For Your Ice Only (15 min)
There's roughly 14 days of winter vacation That fall between Christmas and New Year's So the winter-time problem for our generation Is crammin' fun in before the dust clears Like maybe Building an igloo that looks like a palace Or scale a drift that's 80 feet high Constructing huge snow cones that reach to the moon Or making snow angels that fly Creating Northern Lights Snowboarding upside-down Or slaloming on your rear-end That is cold! Cool winter carnivals Good old snowball fights and ice dancing with your best friends! Ice dancing? As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do and we're not gonna stall Come on, Perry! So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! So stick with us 'cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all! Mom! Phineas and Ferb are making another winter-themed title sequence! Okay, Ferb.
Open the floodgates.
What do you think? It is like our own miniature Canada! But, of course, without the beavers, moose, and disproportionate number of comedians.
Or Canadian bacon.
I forgot all about Canadian bacon.
You realize it is only ham.
Phineas! And Ferb! You are so busted! Hello, boys, splendid job on the hockey rink.
Well, that was amusing.
Great skating, Dad! Boys, I've got some good news for you.
I've arranged for you to play a little exhibition match between periods at the Danville Ice Trays game.
Oh, you mean like at halftime? Well, it's three periods, so it's really two-thirds time.
Bland sports terms.
That's what keeping the Canadians down.
If we're going to be the entertainment, then we'd better kick it up a notch.
Hockey Z-9? Hockey Z-9.
Oh, like Football X-7.
What happened to Y-8? Oh, we're saving that for croquet.
Ferb, grab your toolbox.
We've got work to do.
What's the big deal with hockey anyway? Well, it's hard to explain actually, taking the flip pass from the winner, shoulder deking the defense men, and then, tossing it right over the old glove hand.
Oh, it just takes hold of you like a fever! Did you play a lot of hockey in England there, Dad? Never once.
Hey, Candace.
Oh, hi, Jeremy.
What a great ice rink.
Wouldn't it just be perfect for figure skating? Ice hockey! What? Oh, yeah.
Ice hockey.
I didn't know that you were a hockey fan, Candace.
You betcha! Flipping over win passes, and then shoulder dorkin' the old jazz hands.
It's like some kind of disease! Uh Yeah.
Say, Jeremy, why don't you join us at the exhibition game today? Sounds like fun.
Oh, yeah.
Sounds like PRRRRING!! Sounds like PRRRRING!! Oh, hey, I got a phone call from, um a real person.
Oh, hey, I got a phone call from, um a real person.
Gotta go.
Stacy, we have a Code Teal.
Locusts? Are you sure? No, wait.
I mean Code Periwinkle.
Periwinkle.
A hockey emergency? I'm on it! Speaking of periwinkle, where is Perry? Carl, I'm freezing.
Did you call that repair guy yet? I left him a message, sir.
I think he went to Aruba for winter break.
Lucky dog.
It's cold in Oh! Agent P! Didn't hear you come in.
I have no idea what Doofenshmirtz is up to.
It seems all of our computers froze.
Isn't that right, Carl? Tech support says everything is fine.
Well, I'm sure whatever Doof is up to, he's probably much warmer than we are, and that alone should be reason to stop him! Good luck, Agent P! Welcome, hockey hounds, to the hypothermic hippodrome of Danville Mountain Top Winter Arena, where our own Danville Ice Trays will cross sticks with the combative cross-town contenders.
Reigning over the skating skirmish tonight as guest referee is Hockey Hall of Famer, Luc Robitaille! Is anyone else cold? Why is it so cold in here? We don't know, Luc Robitaille! Actually, I brought a blanket.
So, I'm okay.
Here we are.
Oh, this is so exciting! I've always wanted to be a hockey mom.
Excuse me for a second.
System check.
Stacy, can you read me? I've got the hockey reference manuals, league website, and official rules up and ready! Stacy, Mom said it's my turn to use the computer! Not now, Ginger.
I'm busy.
Don't make me open that can of whipped cream on you! Or however that goes.
Doofenshmirtz evil igloo on a mountain top, eh? Ah, Perry the Platypus! Come in! How do you like my evil igloo hideout up in the Danville Mountains? Would you like some hot cocoa? No? Then, how about a marshmallow? Ha! Trapped you again! I think I figured out why I haven't been able to take over the Tri-State Area.
I've been too much of a nice guy.
Nice guys can't take over large metropolitan areas, except for Roger.
But, we're not talking about Roger.
I've got to get mean.
I've got to get ugly and possibly hairy.
I've got to learn to be more like the abominable snowman.
So, I decided to build this! Behold, the Abominable-natâ Theâ The Abominamaâ The A-bom-in-a-ble-i-nat-or.
See, I can only say it if I speak slowly.
The Abominable inator.
The Abominable inator.
Oh, look, if Iâ If I separate it, it works.
The Abominable Inator! It makes whatever it hits bigger and scarier and hairier.
Anyhoo, behold.
Okay, I know what you're thinking.
"Why the silly little stocking cap and scarf?" The truth is, I, uh I had some yarn.
And the blare of the buzzer brings down the metaphorical curtain on the scintillating second period of this titanic tussle as the grim, gritty gladiators vacate the frozen field of flailing, fighting flugelhorn to prepare for the third period of this tellican, turf-toes tower as the frosty defibrillators mill the frozen peems of icy Oh, man.
I better go lay down.
So when all the members of the offending team clear the defensive zone at the same time, the delayed offset call is negated.
Wow.
You really do know hockey.
Are you kidding? Did you know a referee makes most penalty calls while the linesmen may call only obvious technical infractions.
Go away! obvious technical infractions.
Go away.
The player who committed the infraction is No, give me that.
No, Ginger, I'm busy.
I said, give me that back.
If you don't give that back to me right now Candace, gotta go.
Now for your entertainment, what we've all been waiting for Little Kids On Ice! This is so exciting! Oh! I forgot to charge the battery.
Oh, no! I can't miss this photo op! Where is the gift shop?! Uh, it's way over there, on the other side of the arena.
I'll be right back.
Behold, Perry the Platypus, as I make myself abominable.
Ooh, it's all marshmallow-y and hairy.
Not completely unlike summer camp.
Apparently, you gotta aim this thing a little better.
Whoa! Ow! Hmm Something's not right in the hinterland.
Yikes! Oof! Okay, Ferb! Looks like we're on.
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to be transported to a world where everything you know is changed into a global, glacial dystopia.
If you're looking for something fluffy, forget it, pal.
Because this is the future, where the only things left are hard, cold, and in most cases pointy.
It's a world where the only way to survive is to play hockey while things blow up around you.
It's a world of skillful skating and incredible ice ramps.
Puck-pushing prowess and savage stone gladiators.
Oh, this is so bustable! Mom, d â Where's Mom? She went to the gift shop to buy a disposable camera.
What the heck is that? It's a camera, that you send away to get the film part developed, and then you take the non-film camera-only part, and you throw it away.
What the heck is film? Would you please just look in the back? This is the harsh, hybrid hockey of your dark, dystopian destiny.
Hockey Z-9! Thanks, Dink! Gotta get on the ice! (Song: Hockey Z-9) Oh, yeah! Don't turn away, I'm talking to you, sir 'Bout the post-apocalyptic sport of the future You'll be skating amok, with curved sticks and a puck Put your doctor on speed dial, 'cause you're gonna need sutures Shoulder pads and blades, curling stones for sweepin' Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 It's as far as you can go, alphabetically speakin' It's a game with a brand new name Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Yeah! Yeah, yeah! Hockey Z-9! Oh, my feet! Now, it's working.
Hey, not bad.
A little hairy, but not bad.
Now, to deal with you! Gotcha! Hey, where'd you go? Oh, there you are.
Yes? Ow! Oh! Oh, stupid thing! 'Scuse me, I gotta get through here.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're not allowed out there.
But I gotta go get my mom, and this is the shortcut to the gift shop! I'm sorry, you can't go out there.
That's for players only.
Players, huh? You're gonna go get a uniform and try to get out there, aren't you? Is that a problem? No, as long as we're clear on the concept.
Hey, look at that! There was one in our "disposable stuff from the 80's" box.
Thanks, David.
Let me know if you need more things to throw away! Where the heckâ Hey, how'd you get over there? Don't do that! Oh, man! Okay, now you're just showing off! What? Is there something I shouldâ I fail to see how this could get any worse.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus! Okay, I'm pretty sure that's not supposed to happen.
Mr.
Stevens! Mr.
Stevens, I'm having trouble with the equipment! Sorry.
Excuse me.
Yes, you are Number One.
Excuse me.
Sorry.
Pardon me.
All right, all right, allâ Excuse me! Oh, check it out, a monster ice-polishing machine! Okay, everyone, looks like we're done, let's get out of here.
Oh, my gosh.
That is the cutest thing I've ever seen.
Everyone say, "Canadian bacon!" Ham! Great job, kids.
That was the weirdest game of hockey I've ever seen.
Thanks, Mr.
Robitaille! Okay, I'm all set to sneak across the ice.
Go ahead.
Hockey Z-9 is over.
What? No! Mom, they had giant dangerous With a It's not fair! It's so not fair! Unsportsmanlike behavior! Fine.
Wow, Candace, I had a really good time.
You want to get something to eat? Oh, that sounds like fun! But give me two minutes.
Oh, there you are Perry.
Open the floodgates.
What do you think? It is like our own miniature Canada! But, of course, without the beavers, moose, and disproportionate number of comedians.
Or Canadian bacon.
I forgot all about Canadian bacon.
You realize it is only ham.
Phineas! And Ferb! You are so busted! Hello, boys, splendid job on the hockey rink.
Well, that was amusing.
Great skating, Dad! Boys, I've got some good news for you.
I've arranged for you to play a little exhibition match between periods at the Danville Ice Trays game.
Oh, you mean like at halftime? Well, it's three periods, so it's really two-thirds time.
Bland sports terms.
That's what keeping the Canadians down.
If we're going to be the entertainment, then we'd better kick it up a notch.
Hockey Z-9? Hockey Z-9.
Oh, like Football X-7.
What happened to Y-8? Oh, we're saving that for croquet.
Ferb, grab your toolbox.
We've got work to do.
What's the big deal with hockey anyway? Well, it's hard to explain actually, taking the flip pass from the winner, shoulder deking the defense men, and then, tossing it right over the old glove hand.
Oh, it just takes hold of you like a fever! Did you play a lot of hockey in England there, Dad? Never once.
Hey, Candace.
Oh, hi, Jeremy.
What a great ice rink.
Wouldn't it just be perfect for figure skating? Ice hockey! What? Oh, yeah.
Ice hockey.
I didn't know that you were a hockey fan, Candace.
You betcha! Flipping over win passes, and then shoulder dorkin' the old jazz hands.
It's like some kind of disease! Uh Yeah.
Say, Jeremy, why don't you join us at the exhibition game today? Sounds like fun.
Oh, yeah.
Sounds like PRRRRING!! Sounds like PRRRRING!! Oh, hey, I got a phone call from, um a real person.
Oh, hey, I got a phone call from, um a real person.
Gotta go.
Stacy, we have a Code Teal.
Locusts? Are you sure? No, wait.
I mean Code Periwinkle.
Periwinkle.
A hockey emergency? I'm on it! Speaking of periwinkle, where is Perry? Carl, I'm freezing.
Did you call that repair guy yet? I left him a message, sir.
I think he went to Aruba for winter break.
Lucky dog.
It's cold in Oh! Agent P! Didn't hear you come in.
I have no idea what Doofenshmirtz is up to.
It seems all of our computers froze.
Isn't that right, Carl? Tech support says everything is fine.
Well, I'm sure whatever Doof is up to, he's probably much warmer than we are, and that alone should be reason to stop him! Good luck, Agent P! Welcome, hockey hounds, to the hypothermic hippodrome of Danville Mountain Top Winter Arena, where our own Danville Ice Trays will cross sticks with the combative cross-town contenders.
Reigning over the skating skirmish tonight as guest referee is Hockey Hall of Famer, Luc Robitaille! Is anyone else cold? Why is it so cold in here? We don't know, Luc Robitaille! Actually, I brought a blanket.
So, I'm okay.
Here we are.
Oh, this is so exciting! I've always wanted to be a hockey mom.
Excuse me for a second.
System check.
Stacy, can you read me? I've got the hockey reference manuals, league website, and official rules up and ready! Stacy, Mom said it's my turn to use the computer! Not now, Ginger.
I'm busy.
Don't make me open that can of whipped cream on you! Or however that goes.
Doofenshmirtz evil igloo on a mountain top, eh? Ah, Perry the Platypus! Come in! How do you like my evil igloo hideout up in the Danville Mountains? Would you like some hot cocoa? No? Then, how about a marshmallow? Ha! Trapped you again! I think I figured out why I haven't been able to take over the Tri-State Area.
I've been too much of a nice guy.
Nice guys can't take over large metropolitan areas, except for Roger.
But, we're not talking about Roger.
I've got to get mean.
I've got to get ugly and possibly hairy.
I've got to learn to be more like the abominable snowman.
So, I decided to build this! Behold, the Abominable-natâ Theâ The Abominamaâ The A-bom-in-a-ble-i-nat-or.
See, I can only say it if I speak slowly.
The Abominable inator.
The Abominable inator.
Oh, look, if Iâ If I separate it, it works.
The Abominable Inator! It makes whatever it hits bigger and scarier and hairier.
Anyhoo, behold.
Okay, I know what you're thinking.
"Why the silly little stocking cap and scarf?" The truth is, I, uh I had some yarn.
And the blare of the buzzer brings down the metaphorical curtain on the scintillating second period of this titanic tussle as the grim, gritty gladiators vacate the frozen field of flailing, fighting flugelhorn to prepare for the third period of this tellican, turf-toes tower as the frosty defibrillators mill the frozen peems of icy Oh, man.
I better go lay down.
So when all the members of the offending team clear the defensive zone at the same time, the delayed offset call is negated.
Wow.
You really do know hockey.
Are you kidding? Did you know a referee makes most penalty calls while the linesmen may call only obvious technical infractions.
Go away! obvious technical infractions.
Go away.
The player who committed the infraction is No, give me that.
No, Ginger, I'm busy.
I said, give me that back.
If you don't give that back to me right now Candace, gotta go.
Now for your entertainment, what we've all been waiting for Little Kids On Ice! This is so exciting! Oh! I forgot to charge the battery.
Oh, no! I can't miss this photo op! Where is the gift shop?! Uh, it's way over there, on the other side of the arena.
I'll be right back.
Behold, Perry the Platypus, as I make myself abominable.
Ooh, it's all marshmallow-y and hairy.
Not completely unlike summer camp.
Apparently, you gotta aim this thing a little better.
Whoa! Ow! Hmm Something's not right in the hinterland.
Yikes! Oof! Okay, Ferb! Looks like we're on.
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to be transported to a world where everything you know is changed into a global, glacial dystopia.
If you're looking for something fluffy, forget it, pal.
Because this is the future, where the only things left are hard, cold, and in most cases pointy.
It's a world where the only way to survive is to play hockey while things blow up around you.
It's a world of skillful skating and incredible ice ramps.
Puck-pushing prowess and savage stone gladiators.
Oh, this is so bustable! Mom, d â Where's Mom? She went to the gift shop to buy a disposable camera.
What the heck is that? It's a camera, that you send away to get the film part developed, and then you take the non-film camera-only part, and you throw it away.
What the heck is film? Would you please just look in the back? This is the harsh, hybrid hockey of your dark, dystopian destiny.
Hockey Z-9! Thanks, Dink! Gotta get on the ice! (Song: Hockey Z-9) Oh, yeah! Don't turn away, I'm talking to you, sir 'Bout the post-apocalyptic sport of the future You'll be skating amok, with curved sticks and a puck Put your doctor on speed dial, 'cause you're gonna need sutures Shoulder pads and blades, curling stones for sweepin' Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 It's as far as you can go, alphabetically speakin' It's a game with a brand new name Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Hockey Z-9 Yeah! Yeah, yeah! Hockey Z-9! Oh, my feet! Now, it's working.
Hey, not bad.
A little hairy, but not bad.
Now, to deal with you! Gotcha! Hey, where'd you go? Oh, there you are.
Yes? Ow! Oh! Oh, stupid thing! 'Scuse me, I gotta get through here.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You're not allowed out there.
But I gotta go get my mom, and this is the shortcut to the gift shop! I'm sorry, you can't go out there.
That's for players only.
Players, huh? You're gonna go get a uniform and try to get out there, aren't you? Is that a problem? No, as long as we're clear on the concept.
Hey, look at that! There was one in our "disposable stuff from the 80's" box.
Thanks, David.
Let me know if you need more things to throw away! Where the heckâ Hey, how'd you get over there? Don't do that! Oh, man! Okay, now you're just showing off! What? Is there something I shouldâ I fail to see how this could get any worse.
Curse you, Perry the Platypus! Okay, I'm pretty sure that's not supposed to happen.
Mr.
Stevens! Mr.
Stevens, I'm having trouble with the equipment! Sorry.
Excuse me.
Yes, you are Number One.
Excuse me.
Sorry.
Pardon me.
All right, all right, allâ Excuse me! Oh, check it out, a monster ice-polishing machine! Okay, everyone, looks like we're done, let's get out of here.
Oh, my gosh.
That is the cutest thing I've ever seen.
Everyone say, "Canadian bacon!" Ham! Great job, kids.
That was the weirdest game of hockey I've ever seen.
Thanks, Mr.
Robitaille! Okay, I'm all set to sneak across the ice.
Go ahead.
Hockey Z-9 is over.
What? No! Mom, they had giant dangerous With a It's not fair! It's so not fair! Unsportsmanlike behavior! Fine.
Wow, Candace, I had a really good time.
You want to get something to eat? Oh, that sounds like fun! But give me two minutes.
Oh, there you are Perry.