Steven Universe (2013) s04e01 Episode Script
Kindergarten Kid
- Garnet: # We # - # Are the Crystal # - Steven: # Gems # - # we'll always save the day # Steven: # and if you think we can't # All: # we'll always find a way # - # that's why the people # - # of this world # Garnet: # believe in Garnet # - # Amethyst # - # and Pearl # Steven: # And Steven! # [Creature snarling.]
Here's another one! Got it, Steven! Ready Go! - Grab its legs! - That's not a leg! Ow! [Crash!.]
It's a little disturbing that Jasper was just keeping these corrupted Gems in cages.
Isn't that what we're doing? That's different.
Garnet: They're cared for in the stasis of the bubble.
As long as they're bubbled, they can't hurt anyone and they won't suffer.
It's what Rose wanted.
Huh.
I guess this is the last of 'em.
[Snarls, roars.]
[Laughs.]
I can't believe these dumb things used to be Gems! Pearl, Amethyst, get ready.
This one is flighty.
Are corrupted Gems not like this on Homeworld? We don't have anything like this on Homeworld.
Here we go.
Garnet! [Whip cracks.]
[Snarling.]
[Laughing.]
That was terrible! This is harder than it looks, you know! How could you all be outsmarted by that thing? Well, first, it ran over Garnet, and then Amethyst tried to use her Uh, we don't need the play by play.
Mistakes happen even when you can see the future.
Yeah, Peridot.
Let's see you do better.
Well, I saved all your butts from Jasper.
I suppose I could help you here, too.
Feel free.
This'll be a great chance to show off my metal powers! Then our work here is done.
Uh, I-I'm Are you seriously going to help her? It's just she's all alone out here, with no idea what she's doing.
Oh, Peridot will be fine.
I meant the monster! [Chuckles.]
Okay.
Take as long as you need.
Pearl: Uh, Garnet, are you sure? Wait! [Panting.]
Did the others ask you to bring me back? No, I came to help! It usually takes all of us to capture a corrupted Gem.
That's because you try to out-brute it.
We're going to outsmart it! SoI can help? I could use your experience dealing with these things.
- It just doesn't seem fair.
- Why's that? With you and me teaming up, that thing won't stand a chance.
[Both laughing.]
Yeah! After it! What's it doing? Maybe it likes shiny things? [Grunting.]
This is perfect! I've just concocted a flawless Peri-plan! - So what's the P.
P.
? - If I use my metal powers, the whole thing will fall onto the monster! Give it a try! Carefully [Snarling.]
It'snot falling.
Maybe another leg needs to go.
[Gasps.]
[Growls.]
Fall! You stupid [Chatters.]
Oh, come on! [Grumbling.]
Fall already! Peridot, watch out! Oh, right.
Thank you.
[Grunts.]
Uh, Peridot! There it is! Get it! [Shrieking.]
Keep distracting it! I'll finish it off! [Thud!.]
You okay? I think we need to revise our strategy.
Peridot: Are you ready for the second Peri-plan? The first one wasn't so great.
Yes, noted, Steven.
But this plan is even more flawless! I cannibalized the injector to make a rudimentary cannon! Observe.
Whoa! Impressive! You got that right.
This way, we can take it out from a distance! Oh, there it is! I got it! [Shrieking.]
Heh, you clod.
[Click.]
Huh? [Sighs.]
Work, you stupid [Growling.]
Uhhey.
You win this round.
[Chuckles nervously.]
[Screams.]
Okay.
I've analyzed the problems with the previous two Peri-plans.
Relying on the injectors introduced too many complicating variables.
Now we only have to rely on simple physics! We'll wait until it gets right up under us, not suspecting a thing because it's so dumb! And then we'll drop this rock on its stupid head! It's even more flawless! And at this height, nothing can fall on us! What if it doesn't stop where we want it to? I'm doing the best I can, Steven! [Grunts, roars.]
[Screaming.]
I [Screaming.]
[Panting.]
[Screaming.]
I think You don't poof easily, huh? Us Peridots are tougher than we look! [Insects chirping.]
Yes! This is going to work.
This is going to be perfect! This is going to be [Creaking.]
a waste of my time.
Why can't I master this? Aw, Peridot, it's okay.
Even if none of your Peri-plans worked, at least they were really funny.
The others will probably think so, too, when we go back and get 'em.
Go back? Let it be known that I, Peridot, refuse to move forward or back until I am victorious.
Right.
I don't get it.
I'm smarted than your average Peridot.
How did I fail today against some barely functional, stupid, cloddy, dumb-dumb?! Hey, hey, corruptions aren't dumb.
They just think a little different, that's all.
Okay, just to make sure my Earth vocabulary is correct on this let's say I'm a monster.
I spend all my time slamming my face into hard objects and throwing my tongues in the air for fun.
How am I not dumb? Well, she must be doing something right.
She hasn't fallen for any of your Peri-plans.
It's luck! Nothing that thing does makes any sense! Hey.
[Growls.]
[Yells.]
Why are you bombarding me with your confectionery puff rocks?! To show you what it's like to be a monster! Pretend I'm a freaked-out human screaming at you in fear! Pretend I'm an Earth animal chasing you away from your first safe hiding spot! Pretend I'm an angry green Gem trying to poof you! This is life for you now endless suffering! [Grunting.]
[Yells.]
[Panting.]
- There! You see? - Yeah.
What you're doing makes total sense.
You remember what it was like to have everything important taken away? Being under attack? Feeling trapped? You were frustrated.
So is she! Why don't you try thinking about all of this - from her point of view? - Hmm.
[Grunting.]
You can do it.
Ugh.
I can't take this dirty tongue-flapper seriously.
Thinklikea monster.
Blap! Blap! [Grunting happily.]
Blap! Aw.
[Chortles.]
Hey! [Gasps.]
It's okay! We don't want to fight! Just let Peridot bubble you! We can all get along [Screaming.]
[Yelling.]
No, no, no, no, no! Give methatgem! [Screeches.]
Peridot! [Gasps.]
[Grunts.]
I did it.
[Sighs.]
Oh, hey, you're back! Eh, we never really left.
We knew it'd be funny.
Future vision.
Youyou were all watching this whole time? I told you I could do it.
But I have to admit, it was more difficult than expected.
This corrupted Gem was truly an adversary worthy of my skill.
Whoa! Peridot! Nice bubble, Peri! W-What do I do with it? Garnet: Send it off.
Just tap the top.
Happy trails! - So, where did it go? - Home.
Here's another one! Got it, Steven! Ready Go! - Grab its legs! - That's not a leg! Ow! [Crash!.]
It's a little disturbing that Jasper was just keeping these corrupted Gems in cages.
Isn't that what we're doing? That's different.
Garnet: They're cared for in the stasis of the bubble.
As long as they're bubbled, they can't hurt anyone and they won't suffer.
It's what Rose wanted.
Huh.
I guess this is the last of 'em.
[Snarls, roars.]
[Laughs.]
I can't believe these dumb things used to be Gems! Pearl, Amethyst, get ready.
This one is flighty.
Are corrupted Gems not like this on Homeworld? We don't have anything like this on Homeworld.
Here we go.
Garnet! [Whip cracks.]
[Snarling.]
[Laughing.]
That was terrible! This is harder than it looks, you know! How could you all be outsmarted by that thing? Well, first, it ran over Garnet, and then Amethyst tried to use her Uh, we don't need the play by play.
Mistakes happen even when you can see the future.
Yeah, Peridot.
Let's see you do better.
Well, I saved all your butts from Jasper.
I suppose I could help you here, too.
Feel free.
This'll be a great chance to show off my metal powers! Then our work here is done.
Uh, I-I'm Are you seriously going to help her? It's just she's all alone out here, with no idea what she's doing.
Oh, Peridot will be fine.
I meant the monster! [Chuckles.]
Okay.
Take as long as you need.
Pearl: Uh, Garnet, are you sure? Wait! [Panting.]
Did the others ask you to bring me back? No, I came to help! It usually takes all of us to capture a corrupted Gem.
That's because you try to out-brute it.
We're going to outsmart it! SoI can help? I could use your experience dealing with these things.
- It just doesn't seem fair.
- Why's that? With you and me teaming up, that thing won't stand a chance.
[Both laughing.]
Yeah! After it! What's it doing? Maybe it likes shiny things? [Grunting.]
This is perfect! I've just concocted a flawless Peri-plan! - So what's the P.
P.
? - If I use my metal powers, the whole thing will fall onto the monster! Give it a try! Carefully [Snarling.]
It'snot falling.
Maybe another leg needs to go.
[Gasps.]
[Growls.]
Fall! You stupid [Chatters.]
Oh, come on! [Grumbling.]
Fall already! Peridot, watch out! Oh, right.
Thank you.
[Grunts.]
Uh, Peridot! There it is! Get it! [Shrieking.]
Keep distracting it! I'll finish it off! [Thud!.]
You okay? I think we need to revise our strategy.
Peridot: Are you ready for the second Peri-plan? The first one wasn't so great.
Yes, noted, Steven.
But this plan is even more flawless! I cannibalized the injector to make a rudimentary cannon! Observe.
Whoa! Impressive! You got that right.
This way, we can take it out from a distance! Oh, there it is! I got it! [Shrieking.]
Heh, you clod.
[Click.]
Huh? [Sighs.]
Work, you stupid [Growling.]
Uhhey.
You win this round.
[Chuckles nervously.]
[Screams.]
Okay.
I've analyzed the problems with the previous two Peri-plans.
Relying on the injectors introduced too many complicating variables.
Now we only have to rely on simple physics! We'll wait until it gets right up under us, not suspecting a thing because it's so dumb! And then we'll drop this rock on its stupid head! It's even more flawless! And at this height, nothing can fall on us! What if it doesn't stop where we want it to? I'm doing the best I can, Steven! [Grunts, roars.]
[Screaming.]
I [Screaming.]
[Panting.]
[Screaming.]
I think You don't poof easily, huh? Us Peridots are tougher than we look! [Insects chirping.]
Yes! This is going to work.
This is going to be perfect! This is going to be [Creaking.]
a waste of my time.
Why can't I master this? Aw, Peridot, it's okay.
Even if none of your Peri-plans worked, at least they were really funny.
The others will probably think so, too, when we go back and get 'em.
Go back? Let it be known that I, Peridot, refuse to move forward or back until I am victorious.
Right.
I don't get it.
I'm smarted than your average Peridot.
How did I fail today against some barely functional, stupid, cloddy, dumb-dumb?! Hey, hey, corruptions aren't dumb.
They just think a little different, that's all.
Okay, just to make sure my Earth vocabulary is correct on this let's say I'm a monster.
I spend all my time slamming my face into hard objects and throwing my tongues in the air for fun.
How am I not dumb? Well, she must be doing something right.
She hasn't fallen for any of your Peri-plans.
It's luck! Nothing that thing does makes any sense! Hey.
[Growls.]
[Yells.]
Why are you bombarding me with your confectionery puff rocks?! To show you what it's like to be a monster! Pretend I'm a freaked-out human screaming at you in fear! Pretend I'm an Earth animal chasing you away from your first safe hiding spot! Pretend I'm an angry green Gem trying to poof you! This is life for you now endless suffering! [Grunting.]
[Yells.]
[Panting.]
- There! You see? - Yeah.
What you're doing makes total sense.
You remember what it was like to have everything important taken away? Being under attack? Feeling trapped? You were frustrated.
So is she! Why don't you try thinking about all of this - from her point of view? - Hmm.
[Grunting.]
You can do it.
Ugh.
I can't take this dirty tongue-flapper seriously.
Thinklikea monster.
Blap! Blap! [Grunting happily.]
Blap! Aw.
[Chortles.]
Hey! [Gasps.]
It's okay! We don't want to fight! Just let Peridot bubble you! We can all get along [Screaming.]
[Yelling.]
No, no, no, no, no! Give methatgem! [Screeches.]
Peridot! [Gasps.]
[Grunts.]
I did it.
[Sighs.]
Oh, hey, you're back! Eh, we never really left.
We knew it'd be funny.
Future vision.
Youyou were all watching this whole time? I told you I could do it.
But I have to admit, it was more difficult than expected.
This corrupted Gem was truly an adversary worthy of my skill.
Whoa! Peridot! Nice bubble, Peri! W-What do I do with it? Garnet: Send it off.
Just tap the top.
Happy trails! - So, where did it go? - Home.