The Affair (2014) s04e01 Episode Script

1 Previously on The Affair [JEFFRIES.]
Do you remember the first time you saw her? [NOAH.]
Like it was yesterday.
[LAUGHTER.]
I have to leave.
We've lived together for half our lives.
I'm in love with someone else.
I want you to get the fuck out of my house.
[NOAH.]
What if I moved to Montauk? - Why? - To be with you.
Look, I know I was a jerk, but I I just got out of three years in prison.
I don't want what I used to.
I just want a simple life.
I just want to get back into teaching.
I want to live with someone I love.
You were the best thing that ever happened to me.
[ALISON.]
No, I, uh I want a divorce, Noah.
How's Vik? He's good.
He just got a major job offer in L.
A.
The children's hospital there.
This fella's quite a catch.
Handsome, polite, a doctor.
Anyone would be an improvement after your first husband.
[VIK.]
Noah's not doing well, huh? [HELEN.]
Well, he's downstairs.
I'll tell him to leave right now.
You do what you want, Helen.
Because I get how this goes.
He leaves now.
Whenever he shows up with his bullshit, you let him right back fucking in.
Why can't you just let him go? [HELEN.]
Thing is, for my whole life, I've had this idea that I'm a good person, and, uh, it's not true.
No, it's not.
Good-bye.
I killed Scott Lockhart.
It wasn't Noah.
That is why I let Noah back in.
Because I felt like I owed him and I was trying to fix what I did.
It was not because I loved him.
I'll find you after work.
[NOAH.]
Being a parent is hard.
And I know we haven't done it perfectly, but I learned from my parents' mistakes, and your mother learned from hers, just as you'll learn from our mistakes.
Until someone someday finally has a perfect childhood.
[DRIVER.]
Where we going, buddy? I was screaming into the canyon At the moment of my death The echo I created Outlasted my last breath My voice it made an avalanche And buried a man I never knew And when he died, his widowed bride Met your daddy and they made you I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean I have only one thing to do And that's be the wave that I am, and then Sink back into the ocean, sink back into the ocean Sink back into the o Sink back into the ocean Sink back into the o Sink back into the ocean Sink back into the ocean [QUIET PIANO MUSIC.]
It's been 72 hours.
No one's seen her.
She hasn't called to check in on Joanie.
The police have declared her a missing person.
[ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC.]
[HELEN.]
I just think it's important for you to get settled in first.
[NOAH.]
I am settled, Helen.
I'm in a three-bedroom house.
I got a room for each of them.
I got board games, trampoline.
Are we still litigating custody here? No, Noah, it's just that weekends are really important to them right now.
They're making all sorts of new friends out here.
Okay, but the fact remains that I moved all the way out here to Los Angeles just to be close to my children, and I'm not seeing them.
Look, Noah, I really don't want to get into this right now, okay? We're running late, and I have to get them to school.
Okay, will you just tell Trevor I'll be at his thing tonight? Please.
Helen? Helen? [TIRES SQUEAL, HORN HONKS.]
Asshole.
[QUIET CHATTER.]
Hey, Victor.
Did you get any sleep last night? The baby was up like every half hour.
Believe it or not, you'll miss it.
Yeah? You want to trade? I don't miss it that much.
[VICTOR CHUCKLES.]
So, come on, somebody tell me, why why do none of the other animals stand up to the tyrant Napoleon or his mouthpiece, Squealer? These pigs? Anybody? Come on.
You're teenagers.
Don't you ever feel oppressed or misunderstood? Yes, great.
Martina.
So, like, Mr.
Solloway, I've been wondering, are you married? 'Cause, like, I don't see no ring.
- [STUDENTS LAUGHING.]
- Actually, I'm divorced.
Twice.
[FEMALE STUDENT.]
Ooh! I like a man with a past.
- Okay, okay.
- [LAUGHTER.]
Who'd like to read? Somebody? - Anybody? - [MARTINA CLEARS THROAT.]
Yes, Martina, go on.
Oh.
If I read, Mr.
Solloway, - can I be number three? - [STUDENTS.]
Ooh! Martina, I have much loftier aspirations for you than that.
But yes, you can read.
Page, uh, 53.
Um, Squealer's speech, starting, "No one believes" "No one believes more firmly than Comrade Napoleon - that all animals are equal.
" - [CELL PHONE RINGTONE PLAYS.]
Come on, guys.
Who is that? Can you silence it, please? - [RINGTONE STOPS.]
- Go on, Martina.
Um "And then where should we be? Suppose you had decided to follow Snowball, with his - moonshine of windmills.
- [CELL PHONE RINGTONE PLAYS.]
- Snowball, who, as we know" - Wh? Hang on, Martina.
Just wait.
What? - Give that to me.
- No, mister, please.
- Give me the phone.
- It's just my brother.
He's giving me a ride to my job after school.
I-I work at KFC.
Jaime, I'm-I'm teaching an allegory on tyranny, and you'll know the meaning of that if you don't put that away right now.
- Okay.
- Now, put it on silent.
All right.
Okay, thank you, Martina.
Anton.
The passage Martina just read, where Squealer is basically saying, "We'd love to let you make your own decisions, but we can't because you might make the wrong decisions," you want to tell us what you make of that? No.
Come on.
We'd all love to hear.
Sorry for y'all.
Okay, I get it.
It's a tough passage.
So let's, um let's break it down.
I said I don't feel like it.
I know you don't feel like it, but I want you to participate in the class, okay? So I'd like you to read it.
And you might understand it better.
Come on, read the passage.
I want you to do it.
You need to participate.
I mean it.
Anton I said no.
[DOOR OPENS.]
Principal Wilson, how can we help you? Don't mind me.
Okay.
Okay, so, uh, we were looking at, uh, Squealer's quote.
Well, he's trying to come across as benign, but he isn't, is he? What is he? No problem.
It's a tough question.
When we get a tough question, we go back to the book for the answers.
[CELL PHONE RINGTONE PLAYING.]
Jaime.
But Mr.
Solloway said it was okay.
- No, I did not say that.
- Yes, you did.
- Come on, man.
- No, I didn't.
No, it was a pedagogical It was a a teaching thing.
It was Mr.
Ramos, you can retrieve it at the end of the day from my office.
Oh, come on, Mr.
Solloway.
I thought we were friends.
Jaime is trying to contact his brother who is giving him a ride to work after school.
Jaime is an only child.
[STUDENTS LAUGHING.]
- Brother from another mother? - [LAUGHTER.]
[WILSON.]
I think you and your phone can spend the rest of the day with me.
Let's go.
Mr.
Gatewood, take down that hood.
Thank you.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
Janelle does that to my classes, too, man.
Always sitting in.
And I've been at this charter since the beginning.
Sorry.
I'm lost again.
What are you trying to do? Trying to record the grades from this quiz.
Oh, go back to your home page.
Click on that tab.
That'll take you to your grading landing page.
Oh, thank you.
Sorry.
We didn't really have any of this last time I was teaching.
I'll bet.
You're a lot older than the last guy I shared this room with.
So, should I be worried about Janelle? To be honest, I think she's overcompensating.
Because she knows her hiring's an act of affirmative action.
Look, never mind.
My wife says I'm not allowed to say things like that anymore, so just, uh, forget it.
Let me ask you another writing question.
Mm-hmm.
When you finished your first manuscript, - how'd you get it out there? - Uh well, you make a lot of contacts in grad school.
Oh.
Joel, what does "RD" mean? It means the kid's retaking the class.
I thought AP English was only available to seniors.
Oh.
Anton Gatewood? He was supposed to graduate last spring.
Plagiarized in the second semester, so Janelle made your predecessor fail him.
Now the kid's gotta take the whole year again.
So let me ask you a question.
Do you still have an agent? Uh, hope so.
Sent him a manuscript a couple of months ago.
You think there's any way you could, uh - Go, go, go! - [HONKS HORN.]
[LINE RINGING.]
Hi.
It's Helen.
Leave a message.
- [BEEP.]
- Hey, it's me.
I'm completely stuck in traffic.
It says I'm a half mile away but it's gonna take 40 fucking minutes, so just tell just tell Trevor I'll be there, okay? Sir.
Can I ask where you're going? Uh, yeah.
Sorry I'm late.
My, uh, son is a student here.
Trevor Solloway.
Name? What, my name? I'm his father, Noah Solloway.
Nope.
"Nope"? What do you mean, "nope"? Nope, you're not on the list.
Do you have a school I.
D.
? Uh, how do how do I get one? It's online, sir.
Any parent wanting access to the grounds needs to register.
Hi, Mr.
and Mrs.
Garrison.
How are you? How's it going? Come on in.
Okay, look, I can't do that, so can I get a temporary one? - Can I take one of these? - Nope.
Look, my son is in there.
Sir, I cannot let you through without a pass.
Can you imagine if I let you in and your ex has a restraining order out against you and it's her night with the kids? Hmm? How'd you know I'm divorced? Wild guess.
Helen.
Helen, pick up.
Helen, I'm out I'm at the entrance, and, um, he won't let me in.
You didn't put my name on the list, so, um, can you come vouch for me or whatever? And, uh just call me, please.
You're an asshole.
You know that? [QUIET CHATTER.]
Hey, Trevor.
Stacey.
Hey.
Hey.
[STACEY GIGGLING.]
Noah, I didn't think you could make it.
No, we talked about this, Helen.
What are you doing here? You didn't tell Trevor I was coming? Let's not do this in front of the kids.
Sorry, do what? We talked about this this morning.
We talked over the weekend.
- This was in my calendar.
- Okay, well, sorry.
I made a mistake.
I got confused.
We just have we have a lot going on, so No, I'm not I'm not making a thing of it.
It's just that I was stuck out here.
My name wasn't on the list.
Looks like it was an honest mistake.
I'm not saying it wasn't.
I'm just I know.
I just wanted to show the kids that I was here.
That I am here.
Message received, Dad.
[VIK.]
Look, come to dinner.
We're going to Mexican.
You should come.
[STACEY.]
Yeah, Dad.
You should come with us.
[MARIACHI MUSIC PLAYING.]
Hey.
Sorry I'm late.
Hey, Dad.
Should I sit there? Is this taken? Thanks.
Uh, I put, uh, Los Angeles into the GPS instead of Santa Monica, so Ah.
Yeah.
Santa Monica's a whole different city.
You'll figure it out.
It just takes time.
Uh, can I get a margarita, please, no salt? All right, thanks.
So, kids, guess what I spent last weekend setting up.
- What? - Trampoline.
- Trampoline? - Yeah.
Plus, I got some furniture for your rooms, so hopefully you can come for a sleepover sometime soon.
[STACEY.]
Um, I'll come over for a day, but I don't think I'm gonna sleep over.
Why not? Topanga Canyon's creepy.
What's creepy about Topanga? [TREVOR.]
Mom told her Charles Manson lived there once.
He did.
How do you even know who Charles Manson is? I didn't, and then I YouTubed it.
Thanks a lot.
How about you, Trev? Sleepover, just you and me? Um, his weekends are kind of packed.
He can speak for himself.
[TREVOR.]
Well, I mean, yeah, we can try and get something on the calendar, Dad.
Okay, something on the calendar.
Oh, Mom, Vik, I wanted to talk to you guys about drivers' ed.
- [HELEN.]
Okay, but - [TREVOR.]
So Maybe we'll wait six months? No, no, no, I'm gonna be 15 so soon, and, you know, it's good to get a head start.
Can I get that margarita, please? So, what happened what happened with teacher night? Curriculum night? It went really, really well, right, Trev? Yeah.
I really wish I had been there.
I wanted to see what you were doing.
[HELEN.]
He was just telling us more about the project he's working on in the unit they're studying.
What's the project? Oh, yeah, so there's this girl, and she lives in a funeral home.
Is it a book or It's a graphic novel.
[HELEN.]
And the girl thinks that she - might be - [TREVOR.]
Yeah.
Gay.
But not just thinks.
She is gay.
And as she grows up, she begins to realize that her dad was gay, too, but closeted.
And your partner on this is Brooklyn? Sorry, what's Brooklyn? Is that a Is that a person or Brooklyn's a boy.
Okay, so so Brooklyn's your friend.
I-I don't understand what's going on.
Curriculum night was definitely interesting.
- And so, uh - [TREVOR.]
Yeah, so, um, in the special unit, we then take our chosen graphic novel and study the social issues and history that make up its worldview.
[HELEN.]
Mm-hmm.
And in this case, it would be gay rights? [TREVOR.]
Exactly.
What-what is this graphic novel? Fun Home.
Oh, Fun Wasn't that a musical? Yes, on Broadway, actually.
Anyway, it's a really cool way to learn.
[HELEN.]
Yeah.
Okay, what I was wondering, Trev, is, um I was wondering, is there anything you're trying to express or communicate to us, um, with your choice of material? Because I hope that you know we love and accept everything about you, whatever you are.
Yeah.
I know.
[HELEN.]
Every part of you.
- [TREVOR.]
Yeah, I know.
- Hey.
Helen, can I get a word, please? Sure.
I'm sorry.
What's going on out there? He's been inseparable from this boy.
- Brooklyn? - Brooklyn, yes.
And it's something I've suspected for a long time, - and now finally - Suspected? What? He's gay, Noah.
Wait.
So So, what I was seeing out there was some kind of some kind of attempt to make him say that? [HELEN.]
Ugh, I really, really wish you had been to curriculum night.
Yeah, I-I really tried.
Look, I don't know.
It just seems to me very obvious.
You should see his art.
And then this boy, Brooklyn.
And even his choice of of material.
It's-it's just plain as day.
Okay, okay, first of all, he's 14, Helen.
Maybe maybe he's exploring things, but it's way too early to try to get him to confess to some Look, it was on the tip of his tongue.
I swear to you, he was about to say it.
- [TOILET FLUSHES.]
- Was he? Really, was he? Or were you leading him? 'Cause what I saw was you were definitely leading him.
This is ridiculous.
More ridiculous than trying to out your son in a Mexican restaurant, when he might not even be gay? He is gay.
And hey, guess what.
I have an idea, why don't you just admit you have a problem with it? I don't have a problem with it, if he is.
- He is.
- Okay, fine.
But shouldn't it still be his choice as to when and where he wants to come out? - That's what I'm saying.
- He was about to, until you walked in.
You intimidate him.
Helen, why are you doing this? Doing what? I move all the way out here Yeah, to be with the kids, right? I don't intimidate him or Stacey.
I just don't know them anymore.
That's why I'm here.
And you're doing everything in your power to box me out of their lives.
You know what I'm not doing anymore? This.
I'm sorry.
[ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC.]
[CRICKETS CHIRPING.]
Hey, Alison, it's Noah.
Uh, sorry to call so late.
Um, just checking in.
Okay, bye.
Hey, Max, uh it's Noah.
Believe it or not.
I'm, uh just reaching out.
Hope you're well.
Bye.
Anton Gatewood.
[SCHOOL BELL RINGING.]
Beginning Wednesday, get ready for The Waste Land.
Anton.
Hold back, please.
Uh, I gotta meet my ride.
Your ride can wait a minute.
I want to talk about your essay.
What about it? It's, uh it's very, very, very well done.
Is that right? Yeah.
Your analysis of propaganda in the novel and showing how language can be manipulated to wield power, it's-it's not just good.
It's it's brilliant.
Okay.
So, is that what you wanted to talk about? Yeah.
It's really, really good.
So, what I want to know is who wrote it? What do you mean? Just what I said.
Who wrote this brilliant essay? 'Cause I don't think it was you.
Why not? Well, let's look at the evidence.
You refuse to participate in class.
You just sit there with your head on the desk and your hoodie up.
Yeah, maybe 'cause your class fucking sucks.
We both know your history of plagiarism.
What do you think would happen if you got caught again? If I went straight to Principal Wilson - with this right now? - [ANTON CHUCKLES.]
You think that's funny? You think your future is funny? No, man.
You funny to me.
Why is that? Okay.
How about this quote? "The others said that Squealer could turn black into white.
" Okay.
Explain to me what that means.
So, in the novel, Squealer represents the propaganda machinery that despotic states develop in order to control their populace.
Under Stalin, it was Dmitri Shepilov.
Under Hitler, it was Goebbels.
And the quote, "turning black into white," is just a simplistic way of Squealer saying that he can make evil sound like it was good.
Orwell expanded on this idea in Nineteen Eighty-Four with Oceania's Ministry of the Truth, the irony being that all Ministry does is lie.
Anything else? Anton.
Anton.
Anton, come on.
I owe you an apology.
Fuck you.
[CAR DOORS CLOSE.]
[ENGINE STARTS.]
[ENGINE REVVING.]
[DEEP INHALE.]
[DEEP EXHALE.]
[LONG EXHALE.]
[DEEP INHALE.]
[EXHALES SLOWLY.]
How the fuck do they stay up there? [VIK.]
What are you doing? Nothing.
- Are you obsessing? - No.
[CELL PHONE CHIMES.]
[CELL PHONE CHIMING REPEATEDLY.]
Stacey, breakfast.
[STACEY.]
I'm finishing my math homework.
Well, you can finish it while you eat.
Just a minute.
Trevor, can you please turn that down? Sure, Mom.
- Who's texting you, anyway? - Brooklyn.
Brooklyn, as in our former borough? No, Mom.
Brooklyn's my friend.
Oh.
Well, that's a lot of texts.
What, does she have a crush on you? Wrong gender.
Brooklyn's a boy.
Oh.
Okay.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Look.
I think I've lost like eight pounds.
Maybe you should lay off the green juices.
Thought you were going to relax today.
Um, I am relaxed.
- Stacey! - [STACEY.]
Just a minute! I told you I'd get them to school.
You could've slept in, gone to yoga.
Well, I'll relax right after this.
- I promise.
- Babe.
- Yeah? - Come here.
- No.
- Come here.
Oh, shit.
I have mayonnaise all over my fingers.
What are you so worried about? - Staining your clothes.
- Helen.
I'm not worried about anything.
We have an amazing house.
We're down to just two kids.
They're happy at school.
We're finally all unpacked.
You promised me, when we got out here, you'd take it easy.
And I seriously am going to.
- When? - Today.
Chief Surgeon Ullah.
Mmm.
Say that again.
Chief Surgeon Ullah.
Ooh.
Oh.
[TREVOR.]
Guys.
Gross.
Buzzkill.
[RUMBLING.]
[OBJECTS CLATTERING.]
[VIK.]
Helen.
- Huh? - [RUMBLING STOPS.]
You okay? Yeah.
Fine.
Okay.
Sollomanders, let's rock and roll! Yeah, Stacey, come on.
[STACEY.]
Coming.
Have you figured out who her mother is yet? Think she looks a little like Michelle Pfeiffer, you think? Not really.
- Geena Davis? - Why don't you just ask her? Why don't you? You spend so much time looking at her.
[VIK CHUCKLES.]
No, that would be you, Helen.
Do you think she even realizes these cans are hers, not ours? No, I don't.
And she's not going to if you keep moving 'em for her.
Hey there.
Good morning.
Morning.
Are those mine? Yeah, but don't worry about it.
I got it.
So, tell me, what are you going to do to relax today? Go to therapy.
That just makes you hate your mother.
I already hate my mother.
And besides, this is different.
It's West Coast therapy.
Very chill.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- You guys ready? - Yep.
[MARTIN.]
I've got a negative balance.
I'm sorry.
Uh, can you say that again? I didn't hear you.
I said I'm standing here in checkout at the school cafeteria, and I've got a negative balance on my food card.
Um, okay, well, it-it's your father's month to pay.
Did you try to call him? So you want me to hang up, try to call him, then wait around for him to call me back? I'm trying to get breakfast so I can get to class.
Okay, sweetheart, I'm sorry.
I'll-I'll take care of it.
Give me three minutes, okay? Thanks, Mom.
Oh, God, Noah.
I swear to fucking God.
[THERAPIST.]
So, um, let's try scanning your body, huh? Take a deep breath.
Scan your body.
And tell me where you're feeling tension.
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
Nothing? I'm fine.
But this morning, you thought you felt an earthquake? That's right.
A big one.
Why don't we try that body scan one more time? Dr.
Kaplan, I'm sorry, I'm just really not used to doing therapy this way.
In New York, we-we talked.
We didn't scan.
You still miss New York? Getting easier? Um, yeah, I guess.
I guess so.
I guess it is.
I don't know.
I just feel, um um, uncomfortable here.
This town, it makes me feel unsafe.
Okay.
Unsafe how? Well, like, for example, when's the earthquake gonna hit? [KAPLAN CHUCKLES.]
Which particular earthquake? The big one.
The one that's gonna kill all of us.
I mean, why are we all existing here on a fucking fault line just waiting to die? Doesn't that seem insane to you? Okay, so what I'm hearing is this town, this place, it really makes you feel unsafe.
Yes, I just said that.
Yes, but now I feel I understand the magnitude of your concern.
Was that an earthquake joke? Why don't we try scanning your body - one more time just to see if we - I think my son might be gay.
Oh, okay.
Perhaps there's your earthquake.
What? The earthquake in your life that you so greatly fear.
I'm fine with it.
I am.
I am 100% fine with it.
I'm thrilled, actually.
I always wanted a gay son.
My other son is like Gary Cooper.
It's awful.
It's awful because? It's his father I'm worried about.
Your son's father, your ex? Uh, yeah.
He's not very, uh tolerant.
Ah.
And I'm afraid he's gonna think it it's his fault.
His fault? For not being around when Trevor was young.
For leaving us.
You're afraid your ex-husband will consider your son's sexuality a result of his poor choices? Yeah.
You know, of course, that's not how sexuality works.
Well, I didn't say I thought that.
I said I was afraid he might think it.
Um, how are you and Noah doing? Uh, last session, you were having mixed feelings about his being out here at all.
It's fine.
We're fine.
Uh, it's-it's good for the kids to see him.
I don't have any problems with Noah anymore.
It's just, uh uh - What? - He annoys me.
Huh.
You seem uncomfortable talking about Noah.
Physically uncomfortable.
Do you notice that? Helen, if I may.
I see you relying on your head a lot to rationalize or even deny certain feelings.
You don't seem incredibly aware, appreciative of the intelligence, the experience, the trauma that is hiding in your body.
What trauma? Uh, your husband left you abruptly after 25 years of marriage, then hit his new wife's brother-in-law with a car, fled the scene and ended up going to prison for three years.
Meanwhile, your older son failed out of two high schools, barely graduated, and your daughter dropped out of college to run off to Paris with a man twice her age, who abused her.
I mean, well, when you put it like that I left all of that behind me when I came to California.
I have literally nothing to worry about right now.
Whitney's back in school.
She has an age-appropriate boyfriend who she likes.
And I like him, too.
And Martin seems happy at William and Mary.
And the younger kids really like school here.
And Vik has an amazing job.
And we live in a gorgeous house.
Oh, and my parents are 3,000 miles away.
I don't have to work right now if I don't want to, and it's sunny every day.
Every goddamn day.
Every goddamn day is sunny perfect.
But you know what, sometimes the sun gives me a headache.
And I fucking hate this ocean.
- You hate the Pacific? - Yeah.
There's nothing you can do when you're around it except look at it.
It's so huge and blue and obvious.
It's like an attention whore.
The ocean is is an attention whore? Okay, no, when you say it like that, it makes me sound crazy.
That's not what I was trying to I know, but never mind.
It's all right.
Just, you don't get it.
Never mind.
You know, I think this would be a really good time to just try closing your eyes - and holding your breath - Fuck you, Ezra.
[SEWING MACHINE WHIRRING AND RATTLING.]
Priya? I'm almost done.
Vik didn't tell me that you were coming over.
He told me his pants are falling down, so I'm taking them in.
Um, well, I could have taken care of that.
Do you know how to sew? No, but I could've, um you know, dropped 'em off somewhere.
At a tailor's? Yeah.
I am a tailor.
I know.
I just I didn't want to bother you, so Why would it bother me to do something nice for my son? Does it bother you to care for your children, Helen? Can I get you something? Uh we have, um, water, juice.
I think we have some club soda.
Wow.
[PRIYA CHUCKLES.]
His favorites.
Baingan bharta, chicken tikka, chole bhature.
I've even brought Indian bread naan.
It's in your freezer.
Don't put it in the oven.
It'll get crusty.
Put it in the microwave and heat it in a frying pan.
He can take the leftovers for lunch to work.
I really don't know what to say.
There's plenty for you and your children, too.
You really didn't have to do this.
I mean, there's enough food in there for a week.
I don't mind doing it every Sunday.
- I know you're busy.
- Well, I'm not that busy.
I have time to cook.
What? Vikram is very skinny.
I know.
I think he's stressed out.
Um, about his new job.
Perhaps.
Or perhaps he's simply not accustomed to the food you cook.
A husband should be fat.
It shows he's happy.
Oh, I think Vik's happy, Priya.
I mean, I I think I make him happy.
That's what he tells me.
Of course, no man is truly happy until he has children of his own.
Um [CLEARS THROAT.]
Okay, will you excuse me? I have to do something.
[ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC.]
[RUMBLING.]
[OBJECTS CLATTERING.]
[RUMBLING AND CLATTERING STOP.]
[WATER DRIPPING SLOWLY.]
[SEWING MACHINE RATTLING AND WHIRRING IN DISTANCE.]
[TAKES DEEP BREATH.]
Oh, hi.
- Helen? - Hi.
Yes.
Sierra, right? - Yeah, that's right.
- How's it going? Great, actually.
I, uh I have been picking these literally all morning, and I just realized that I-I never really welcomed you guys, so Well, thank you.
Wow, this room is great, by the way.
Thanks.
Uh, just come in.
Who's your, uh who's your interior person? Oh, I'm my interior person.
Wow, this is a lot of avocados.
Oh.
Yeah.
I, uh I mean, I was never gonna eat all of those on my own.
But my mom actually has this amazing guac recipe - on her blog.
- Oh, right, your mom.
What is the name of her blog again? I'll send it to you.
You have amazing skin.
- Oh.
- No, seriously.
Like, I was just gonna tell you about this mask that you can make with the avocado that, like, literally sucks the toxins out of your skin, but I feel like maybe you already - do something like that.
- No.
- No, you're glowing.
- Oh.
Well, thank you.
Okay, well, um, I'll go.
- Okay.
- I-I did just want to say that if you ever wanted, like, you know, a workout buddy or a drinking buddy, I do both a lot.
Great.
Thank you.
- Have you ever tried goat yoga? - [HELEN LAUGHS.]
Goat yoga? No.
Oh, my God, it's yoga but with baby goats.
- Really? - Yeah.
They, like, massage you with their little hooves.
So it might be fun if we wanted to do it together.
Well, thank you.
That would be nice.
Thanks.
I'm so glad that you guys moved in here.
Really, because the last people were really cold, you know.
They had a very stagnant energy.
They were Scandinavian.
Oh.
But you Your being is, like it's a little [CLICKS TONGUE.]
It is? Yeah, I don't know.
I-I guess we'll find out.
Okay.
Bye.
[MECHANICAL WHIRRING.]
Nice school.
Apparently.
I am disappointed there's no particle accelerator.
[HELEN CHUCKLES.]
I'm sure they'll have a capital campaign to buy one.
Maybe he's just running late.
Maybe he found something better to do.
Why do you still let him get to you? I don't know.
- There's Trevor.
- Mmm.
[WOMAN.]
Hi.
You're Trevor's parents, aren't you? Uh, well, I'm You guys have such a wonderful son.
Oh.
Did you hear that, Vik? We have a wonderful son.
Thank you.
Yeah, we really think so, too.
And you guys, of course, know Brooklyn.
Um, we know about Brooklyn more than we know him, but yes, of course.
They're joined at the hip, those two.
Totally inseparable.
- Mm-hmm.
- Which I want you guys to know, we totally support here in every way.
This is a safe environment in which Trevor can fully express himself.
Anyway, great to see you, and great to have Trevor with us.
He's truly special.
Thanks.
So he's gay, right? As the day is long.
Do you think that kid made that robot by himself really, or did his parents help him? - [NOAH.]
What the fuck, Helen? - Noah, where were you? I don't know what kind of sick game you're fucking playing here, but those are my kids, too, and if you ever try to box me out of their lives again Box you out of their lives? You didn't show up, - and suddenly that's my fault? - You didn't put my name on the fucking list.
What list? I don't even know Okay, stop.
That's enough.
Your kids are coming, guys, so what do you want to do? How do we want to play this? [VIK.]
You're saying you actually think the producers of Fun Home would give you the rights to direct a student production? Yeah.
Me and Brooklyn.
You think I can't do it? [VIK.]
I know you can do it.
It's just a matter of your convincing the producers.
Because, really, who are you? You're just some kid.
I have good ideas.
So practice your pitch on me first.
You only get one chance with these people.
I can tell you the parts that need work.
You would do that? You have to make an appointment first.
- I'm a very busy person.
- Okay, okay.
I'll have Brooklyn's mom call your mom.
- That'll be fine.
- [TREVOR.]
Yeah.
You know, I, um I really like Brooklyn a lot.
Yeah, I know you do.
And I'm really glad.
And I think Vik is glad about that, too.
You know if I can be honest with you guys, sometimes I think I might be [NOAH.]
Oh, God.
So sorry I'm late.
This fucking traffic.
Jesus.
Oh, can I take that? Put that on our tab.
Thanks.
Hey, little man.
You okay? What were you talking about? Nothing.
- Hi, Dad.
- Hi.
Can I talk to you? - What the hell's going on? - Martin called me today.
You forgot to fill his food card.
Is it my month? - I'm sorry.
- You know, I am really trying, but you are not the center of the fucking universe, Noah.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Helen, not this again.
Do you know what you just blundered into out there like a like a bull in a china shop? Trevor was about to tell us he's gay.
- What? - Yes.
I-I-I'm I'm pretty sure he was about to tell Vik and me that he thinks he's gay.
Well, okay.
Good for him.
We're happy for him, right? Yes, of course we're happy for him.
I just wanted him to be able to tell us.
Which he was trying to do, and then you showed up.
Okay, well, I didn't know.
So let's go back out there, and maybe he'll No, don't you see what happened? You walk in, and he just shuts down.
And you come in, and you're angry, and you're swearing, and you're grabbing beers, you're eating chips and It's a Mexican restaurant.
He is intimidated by you.
- That's ridiculous.
- He's afraid to tell you.
Well, maybe if he spent more time with me He's afraid you're gonna think it's your fault.
Why would I think it's my fault? - Because it is.
- What? - Trevor being gay is my fault? - No.
Shut up.
- That's not what I said.
- It is what you said.
Well, it's not what I meant.
Well, what the fuck did you mean, Helen? - I - [RUMBLING.]
Is that what you think? If that's what you really think, then you've got really weird ideas about how people become gay.
[RUMBLING INTENSIFIES.]
Oh, my God, it's you.
[RUMBLING STOPS.]
You're the earthquake.
I'm the what? You're the other fucking shoe.
You're the reason why I can never ever relax.
Because every time I see you, I am just waiting for the next disaster to happen.
[RUMBLING STOPS.]
Jesus Christ, Helen.
That's a little unfair to me, don't you think? No, I don't.
You know, years ago, you broke our family apart, and now I finally have a new life in a new place.
The only problem is you're still in it.
Well, what do you want me to do, Helen? Not see my kids? 'Cause that's not gonna happen.
No, I understand.
I I think we should just try to stay away from each other as much as possible.
Okay.
Okay.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
[EXHALES SLOWLY.]
Hey.
Five more minutes.
It's pretty late, okay? - Okay, Mom.
- Okay, good night.
Good night.
- Hi.
- Hey.
I was thinking maybe we could take a few days and go up to Big Sur.
I've never been there.
It's supposed to be, like, God's country.
Huh.
Sounds awful.
Yeah.
I'll switch some things around, try to clear a weekend.
I'd love to have you to myself for a few days.
[ELECTRIC TOOTHBRUSH BUZZING.]
You know, I think I'm actually starting to understand - why people like L.
A.
- [CLUNK, THUMP.]
[TOOTHBRUSH CONTINUES BUZZING.]
What do you think about that? Vik.
Vik!