Billions (2016) s04e02 Episode Script
Arousal Template
1 [Wendy.]
Previously on Billions On power of the President, you are fired! [Jock.]
Mr.
Connerty, as your first detail [Jock.]
as United States Attorney for the Southern District, please show this gentleman out.
The palace coup is complete.
I did what I had to do to survive.
And to win.
You have to know that anything I do to stop you is warranted.
[Axe.]
Rudy, you're fired.
For fraternizing.
[Axe.]
With our sworn fucking enemies.
You will move assets how and when I tell you.
[Axe.]
Your 2 and 20 is now 1 and 10.
[Axe.]
The rest will be paid to me.
You are now officially but unofficially the proud owner of half of my half of Panay's fund.
It's time to put away childish enthusiasms.
[Troy.]
They left me no choice.
Said they were going to destroy my business, my life.
Most of your major cases are being put under review by Connerty.
Your name will be ruined.
And Epstein's vacated New York Attorney General's seat [Chuck.]
is there for me.
He owed me a favor.
Yeah.
As I do now.
You got that carry permit you were looking for.
We need to be certain no money is going [Wags.]
to ex-employees of Axe Capital Please stop fucking with Taylor Mason.
[Grigor.]
Forget all about them.
But be sure you don't forget about me.
[Wags.]
He's a Russian Oligarch.
[Wags.]
But you, mon frère, are a motherfucking American Oligarch.
You will not relent.
Taylor must pay.
We have to do it without Grigor getting a whiff of us.
[Axe.]
We don't put out this fire by pouring water on it.
But by sucking oxygen out of the room.
Completely.
[dramatic music.]
[mechanical whirring, clanging.]
This is the competition's [whirring, clanging continues.]
[Theo.]
Not exactly RoboCop.
But until now, considered state of the art.
Ooh, money just walked in.
[Wags.]
Rebecca Cantu.
Oh.
So that's what a rich person looks like.
I'd always wondered.
But check out this badass our company built.
Brains like Will Hunting, strength like Artis Gilmore in the ABA days.
- [mechanical whirring.]
- Ooh.
[door thuds.]
Which is why Patriot Trust Bank is proud to be doing this raise for you.
I'll let the scientists who made him tell you how and why later on, but I want you to know that we are committed to helping put one of these in every company loading bay, and eventually, every home in America.
What size investments are available? My kind of question.
We're looking for no more than five firms to fulfill $100 mil in this C round, [Theo.]
which comes with anti-dilution rights.
Anything else? [Rebecca.]
The, um The noise signature, that hum, uh, makes me believe there's a combustion engine inside there.
Rebecca, this product wasn't hand-delivered to you early, so I'll forgive you for not having your research in order.
We have a proprietary power source.
[company CEO.]
It's one of the reasons we're set apart.
Anyone else have a question? Oh.
It's proprietary.
That It Thanks.
Withdrawn.
I'm sorry.
Over the line, Smokey.
Forfeit your turn.
- [Wags.]
Mark it zero.
- Not how it's gonna go.
Of course, proprietary doesn't tell us shit, does it.
I grew up with a mechanic for a father.
So, uh, forgive me.
That's definitely a combustion engine.
[Rebecca.]
And that won't work for the military.
[Rebecca.]
So you'll have to improve the battery technology, but the, uh, the margins on this thing are already thin as Kate Moss on a juice fast.
[Theo.]
The money taken in today will go a long way in offsetting any costs we might incur Mm.
It doesn't know how to walk.
I don't know what you were looking at.
There's no remote.
No human control at all.
But it's not actually stable, right? It's metastable.
I've seen this demo a dozen times.
Hasn't fallen hasn't even stumbled once.
Well, you could hold a curling match on this floor.
But, um, what about [Rebecca.]
now Can we run it again? [laughter.]
Any other questions? Whoa.
They shoulda had you inside the tent.
Could've trouble shot it, helped launch it.
I don't launch shit products.
Lucky she was here, or we might've actually gone in on that loser.
So, straight back to the office Oh no Axe, look, I know this may still seem a little bleeding edge It's the Mechanical Turk.
But at least that beat people at chess before the con was revealed.
This company has real consumer potential Yet this bank is invested in this because the chairman's son was in the Spee with the Chief Tech Officer.
Or some bullshit like that.
He told you to deliver.
That's why you've been doing all the talking today, because it matters to you.
But now you're gonna have trouble salvaging anyone else in this room.
If it makes your life easier, I'll take a piece.
You will? That's great But there's something that matters to me that I need in return.
Won't cost you a penny.
Will even save you some [dramatic music.]
This is gonna be a time of great prosperity for us both.
So I'm glad to continue To renew [Axe.]
To start our friendship.
I know your bank would have liked the other business [Axe.]
But I'm touched that you prefer mine.
Based on a number of factors Including the brevity of your track record - Alto Bank - Bank Allemane Patriot Trust Bank can't extend you leverage at this juncture.
Thank you for your time.
Here.
Have a koozie.
[dramatic music.]
I can set you more meetings.
No.
I've seen more eyes go cold on me than Agent Bill Tench did in a whole season.
Axe got to all of the bankers.
- I'm done.
- I should have gone.
You don't have time to waste on that shit.
It's not time that's the problem.
It's capital.
Winston and the quant team have a huge stat arb opportunity that I'm gonna have to leave on the table if we don't lock in leverage by end of week.
I can't let Axe cause that.
- You have an idea? - Not even a notion.
Yet.
But I will.
We will.
[dramatic music.]
He actually invested in the piece of shit Believe me, I was excited that we were getting into Private Equitatus, but badly built robots Private equity, Spyros.
Maybe just show me your mood ring if you want me to know how you feel.
Or don't.
Because I don't give a shit.
[Wags.]
But if we go in on crappy companies just to get the return favor of fucking over Taylor Mason, it's gonna be a hard sell to our investors [Wags.]
on the wisdom of the idea.
At a certain point, the Street's gonna start wondering if you care more about revenge than making money.
And so do I.
Leave.
[dignified.]
I serve at your pleasure.
And so do I.
Meaning: I feel the same way he does.
If you burn cash and have down quarters just to hurt Taylor, you're Neil McCauley throwing it all away to kill Waingro in that motel.
I can't stand by and let that happen.
For a minute there, you're glad that Neil allows himself to feel.
But then, yeah, his one moment of humanity kills him.
But this isn't that.
We're mixing into private equity.
For real.
And I got everybody downstairs generating ideas.
But you haven't said yes to any of them yet.
They have a dozen internal ideas you've turned down.
- 'Cause they all suck.
- They can't all suck.
What we need is a meaningful partnership.
And I know how to find it [dramatic music.]
Helena, could you have the team put together a list of all the private companies Rebecca Cantu is invested in.
Ah, shit, Wags.
You really know your man.
I never asked to be your Attorney General.
I'm just a small-town lawyer who was called to serve.
And that's what I did.
Under our last AG, Alvin Epstein, who felt the call to duty in DC.
[Darcha.]
But now that fate and the New York State Legislature [Darcha.]
have made me the Interim Attorney General I'm asking you to let me see this mission through You think he's got what it takes? - [Darcha.]
and keep serving.
- To win? Well, he's starting with the job.
As natural advantages go, that's a good start.
And if he gets it? His rep is: he stays in his own side of the sandbox.
Well, if he's not gonna scrap with us over jurisdiction and for cases, he's my kind of candidate - Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
[Darcha.]
and to the people of New York.
- [Darcha.]
Thanks to the tireless - Look at him.
Champing at the bit to keep the reins of power now that he has them.
- Don't do that.
- What? If you're talking to people, it's chomp.
But it's not that.
It's from the poem: "Twelve beauteous steeds, of golden color and with golden manes, Champ at the bit.
" Champ.
Champ.
We can go home now.
Voters don't want William Safire.
They want an Attorney General who talks like he's actually from New York.
[Darcha.]
this effort and the progress we've made.
There's still The concealed carry for your client personally taken care of.
- Hand-stamped for approval.
- Thank you.
Let me know if he needs a lesson.
I'll take him to Tiro myself Why do I feel an ask is coming? 'Cause you're a bright boy.
And contract makes the world go 'round.
Okay.
What's up in this rotation? The police pension fund.
I need an independent look at the administrator, Raul Gomez.
Funds unaccounted for? I don't have access to the books, but after 20 as a cop and years of restrained living, he's suddenly got a NetJets account.
He flew private down to the Derby.
Uh huh.
You do, as they say, have people for that.
Whilst I am merely a humble barrister with no particular portfolio.
When cops get going investigating cops, they're worse than scamps in a sewing circle.
As you well know, Chick.
Which is why I'm coming to you.
And to insulate yourself.
Raul Gomez is a man with a lot of friends, many inside your very department.
Some might even be more loyal to him than to you and wouldn't hesitate to lash out at little ol' me.
- Thank you, and bless you.
- [applause.]
Now, who's gonna look after Rhoades if that comes to pass? [camera shutter clicks.]
You know how to take care of yourself.
And even if you aren't one, you operate like an insider.
Who's better at tracking down and punishing financial wrongdoing than you? Well, I didn't have you as a flatterer.
I'm whatever I need to be.
- Nice to see you.
- [indistinct conversations.]
Now I gotta be a rabbi.
Excuse me.
Oh.
Guiding your boy to the top seat? No.
He's not my boy.
Yet.
He's new to certain parts of this life, so I need to see him in action before I decide.
Do what I ask and you'll graduate from cadging pop gun permits for big players to becoming one yourself again.
[dramatic music.]
You looking for the endorsement of the Police Commissioner to catapult you into the race? I want his men.
I want their votes.
And I want the visual of them bathing me in all that blue.
[indistinct conversations.]
Cleaning Cleaning what? Uh w-wages I remember him speaking English when we hired him.
Maybe it'll come back after we punt him into the Hudson.
Eureka Building Solutions.
New big national janitorial services company.
Thousands of employees.
They're chewing up the competition, undercutting all bids.
Best margins in the industry.
Is that what motormouth was going on about? [Ben Kim.]
Tuk has relatives without green cards, only temporary work visas, who work for Eureka.
They get paid 16 bucks an hour, plus benefits.
What's the thing? Company forces them to kick back salary, off the books.
Benefits aren't real.
[Ben Kim.]
They're really getting paid less than minimum wage.
If they complain, the company jams them up with ICE.
And the chief investor in their main competitor, Manifest Cleaning Services, seems to be Rebecca Cantu.
We were told to look for overlapping businesses.
But Eureka's a private company, so we can't short it But we can burn it to the ground, [Axe.]
leaving Rebecca's company to own the market.
Tuk, you're about to go get a job Will you set a dinner with Rebecca Cantu? Oh.
Yay.
- Can we go somewhere meaty? - Actually, you know what? I'll call and set it myself.
For two.
[Fred Eaglesmith's "Been a Long Time".]
[phone receiver beeps.]
[Axe.]
Helena, will you get Rebecca Cantu? - It's been a long time - [man.]
Roni Supreme for ya.
It's been a long time Do you mind if I eat before you? I don't like to take a long lunch hour.
This is actually the first time I've left the office during lunch.
You're a partner, you can't live a little? Yeah.
No.
You're right.
I've got a very small equity piece so technically It's been a long while I'm sorry about what happened to you.
Sure has been a long, long while - Was it really out of the blue? - Kinda.
I mean, when you're almost fired so many times and then not you start to believe you're Willis in Unbreakable.
Right until they shatter your heart into a million pieces.
- Ah, shit man.
- No one there will talk to me.
I think because they assumed I'd walk across the river and take a job with you guys.
- So - I was trying to make you How's it going at Taylor Mason Capital? Fine.
Good.
New firm.
Strikes and gutters, ya know, but I need a job, man.
My attorney said my non-compete isn't binding.
And Axe Cap isn't gonna fight it anyway.
So I'm coming to you because you know what I can do.
You know you can count on me.
And my wife is super pregnant.
Done.
Taken care of.
Really? I gotta talk to the team, but, like you said, I have ownership interest.
I'm employee number one or two.
Is Taylor an employee? Doesn't matter.
The point is I got you.
[electronic music.]
Mr.
Panay.
Smart of you to accept my invitation to discuss the police pension fund.
[sighs.]
Surely me stalking through your office would raise questions you wouldn't want to answer.
Or perhaps just whispers that might escape your walls.
I agreed to meet you here so I could leave when I wanted to.
We may already have arrived at that moment.
Well, if you've nothing to hide, what's your rush? I'm managing more money than God and bringing in better returns than He did last year.
So that doesn't leave me a lot of time to deal with a man strutting around on phantom limbs.
I know damn well you got cut off at the knees.
Time's a fickle beast.
Why, a year ago, I had legions at my command while your fund was deflating like a Tijuana breast implant.
Hell, I wouldn't be surprised [Chuck.]
if you were Googling how to tie a noose.
And yet through some act of prestidigitation, you wound up with a lifeline instead.
[dramatic music.]
Now, it's possible that the God whose ass you are kicking on the board took pity on you.
But I think it's more likely that Raul Gomez saw a desperate man that he could manipulate.
So tell me how's it work? Is he invading the principal? Or are you just kicking back to him? [chuckles.]
Raul is as clean as they come.
He pulled the pension fund from Axe Cap [Panay.]
the second Axelrod's legal troubles set in.
And then he picked me because I am a paragon of business ethics.
You do know that Axe was in that legal trouble because I put him there.
[Panay.]
But he survived.
He always does.
How come you don't know that by now? And for the record, I didn't even mean to mention his name.
There is no record.
Why does mentioning his name concern you, friend? You have no business with him, do you? Just don't want it to seem like I'm gloating that I took from him, is all.
[Chuck.]
Hmm.
Is that the thing? You took from him? Or is there more to it? This game can be cutthroat.
That's it.
Uh-huh.
Hmm.
Okay.
Thanks for coming in, Mr.
Panay.
[keys clacking.]
I came across a tantalizing tidbit during my daily rounds.
It's Bonnie's birthday That's the tidbit? No.
She was contacted by a certain former Axe Cap employee whom I'll just call "Mafee.
" And "Mafee" invited her to celebratory drinks.
She declined, but she didn't officially report it.
Still not sharing.
And let me guess how you came across this morsel: In addition to reading all the e-mails flagged for possible compliance violations, you're also perusing any sent to eligible females in our employ.
Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.
As the head of HR, I really need to ask you to cut that the fuck out.
Axe Cap emails are not your personal Penthouse Forum.
Is Bonnie still here? She's doing a B-day shindizzle with some of the people here - Are you going? - It's for the psilikatzides.
Small timers.
You weren't invited.
Neither were you.
- Wait, are you going? - Come on.
Shut up.
[The Commodores' "Brick House" plays over speakers.]
Mm, mm, mm Hi! Oh, come on.
This one's classic, right? Ow, she's a brick house You got a problem with the 'Commodes?' Was expecting you to bring more Steely Dan.
Oh.
I hold back the top shelf for my birthday.
- She's a brick - Uhh, - House - oww.
The adults are here to party! Ain't holding nothing back Ow, she's a brick house Happy birthday! Well put-together, everybody knows this is [Natalie Merchant's "Wonder" plays over speakers.]
They say I must be one of the wonders Of God's own creation This one's mine! And they smile as they see they can offer No explanation Got any other celebrations planned? Didn't plan this one.
People like to fete me.
And you let them? I don't know.
If I feel like a drank.
Anyone you don't feel like drinking with? [chuckles.]
Okay, I know why you're here.
'Cause that laxtard Mafee tried to sniff my panties.
I shut that shit down.
I don't need to report everything I do to mommy but why is mommy spying on my shit? I'm the head of HR, email correspondence hits me even when I'm not looking for it.
Uh huh.
So, my emails just happened This isn't all about you.
We are all as sick as our secrets.
So stop keeping 'em.
I will if you stop snooping.
Faith - She'll make her way - Deal.
She'll make her way Topper.
What's the matter with you? - I've got work early tomorrow.
- People see me Yeah.
We all do [chuckling.]
Oh, right.
The other work.
Sorry, bud.
- Topper.
- I'm over your heads, how I confound you and astound you To know I must be one of the wonders What's that mean? - COAT?! The fuck is that? - Of God's own creation It means "Chance of Action Tonight.
" Coat.
[chuckles.]
Who were you writing that to? - My wife.
- Oh.
Puke.
In assessing nocturnal options, whether to keep drinking, head home, or squeeze in a tight little karaoke set, [Spyros.]
it is good to know the likelihood of success with your special lady.
Sexually.
Well, assuming you pay her cash, chance should be north of 100.
I can assure you, I do not pay for it.
- No.
You just beg for it.
- [laughs.]
- Sometimes.
- Sometimes it works! Maybe for you and you only.
But not for your wife.
What you guys don't seem to realize with all of your begging and whining is: Act like a man, sometimes a girl just needs to get railed.
Don't you agree? Nobody wants to fuck a sexual panhandler.
[laughter.]
So how does it work in your bedroom? Know this child will be gifted With love, with patience and with faith Action whenever either of us fucking wants it.
- Okay.
- Oh! - Yes.
- Yeah! - That's it.
- Cheers! - Come on! - Yeah! - [laughter.]
- She'll make her way [serene music playing over speakers.]
[knock on door.]
[keypad beeps.]
May I? Tai chi.
The dance of the yin and yang.
You ever practice? In my day, I have tried it all.
But I always come back to brute force.
[music stops.]
Much like Mr.
Axelrod.
You've heard about my banking problems.
Yes.
And like your Mighty Mouse, Here I come to save the day.
By providing me leverage.
Yes.
And no.
There are friends I have.
Uh, they do similar work, they come from a similar place.
Brothers.
The Kozlovs.
And they're looking to get more of their money into the West.
So you've done me the favor of finding the leverage And you will do me the favor of being most hospitable to my friends.
I'll look into it.
Yes.
Look before you leap.
So long as in the end, you leap.
[dramatic music.]
[Gang of Youths' "The Heart Is A Muscle" playing.]
I will look at love as more than - You're in a select club.
- Just an instrument of pain Female billionaires not named Oprah? Sure.
But I meant people who have stopped me from making an investment.
I'm not usually so easy to dissuade.
You seem pretty easy.
If you keep pouring like that I will be.
No, but really, thank you.
I might've been fooled by that robotics demo.
I happen to be expert in that.
That's the thing about doing what I do.
You're in these investments for so long, you really can't take any chances.
I have to dive deep into all these companies, really understand what the businesses are doing.
I'm counting on that.
Well [chuckles.]
I'm not gonna carry your fucking water.
[chuckling.]
I don't expect you to.
What if I want to partner with you? I'm not raising.
You're really not taking on any money? Opening a new fund in a couple months.
We could talk then.
Maybe we don't go through the fund.
You got a personal piece of everything, right? So break me off a piece of your piece.
What are you high on from the last batch? A bottled cocktail company.
A better mousetrap for backend webforms.
Uh, an industrial custodial company, but that one's fully subscribed.
Then that's the one I want.
Why, 'cause it's so sexy? Hmm? While there's speakers in the outfield I wasn't doing the conman thing.
I wasn't telling you that there's no opportunity so that the scarcity would get you to implore me for a way in.
It really is full.
Well, even if it's not a game, I believe in your confidence.
How much of the company do you have? Say half.
I'll take it.
Not on your charmed life.
Half of your half.
At 1.
5x the market price.
To love someone What's behind the mighty hankering for that specific deal? If you're that deep in it, I know it's the one.
Men in business.
It was a steady stream of no's and rejections, first from my bosses, then when I went looking for capital.
And now that I don't need you, you all want to chip off a piece.
I can promise you: I'm a value add.
Yeah, I don't doubt that for some reason.
The heart is a muscle and Is that what made you leave the shopping network and go out on your own, shitty male bosses? They hired me to pick the products.
The ones I rolled out were stone winners.
Yet I still had to fight them.
[Rebecca.]
Eventually I couldn't handle them [Rebecca.]
not listening to my ideas.
How basic they thought.
How slow they moved.
The way I heard it, you started hoarding all the best products instead of putting them in the system.
That way you had 'em when you launched on your own.
Well, if that were true, how could I have kicked their ass in the lawsuit they brought? I wanna be loved I wanna be whole again I saw value.
I took.
So tuck my hair behind my ears You think that makes me bad? The window is wide Yeah.
I do.
In the best way.
'Cause I-I-I-I wanna overcome [Rebecca moaning.]
And try-y-y-y to love someone [soft music.]
[exhales deeply.]
Mm.
Can I get the box? This is working for me.
[sighs.]
[breathing heavily.]
Please? [exhales sharply.]
[Chuck snoring quietly.]
[birds chirping.]
How the hell did you find me It wasn't easy.
It wasn't meant to be.
You know I'm not my father-in-law.
Yet you're here.
You tracked me down.
What do you want? You once told me you knew people who switched it up.
Reversed who was dominant.
Changed styles altogether.
Yes.
They were role players.
Experimenting.
So, yes, they switched, from time to time, moved off of bondage altogether.
Tried exhibitionism, voyeurism.
Other forms of play But that's not Chuck, not his arousal template.
For him it's not a game.
It's rooted deep.
Thank you.
Don't thank me.
Just don't come back.
[dramatic music.]
[keys clacking.]
Hey, I wanted to ask you I need to deal with something.
Is it urgent? No, it's a personnel thing.
Someone I want to bring in.
Anyone you think meets our hiring criteria and fits our culture goes to the top of the list.
Well, I don't know if he's top-of-the-list.
- It's Rudy.
- You think we need a mascot? I think he'd be a net positive.
He never really got a shot to show what he could do.
If you think I didn't coach him up well enough, - have at it.
- I-I didn't mean You are a vital and valued member of this firm.
And if you want to bring Rudy on, under you, and take responsibility for him blooming, you have my full blessing.
Excuse me.
[sighs.]
Report.
Here's the brief.
Tl;dr, please.
The Kozlovs They're a rougher, messier version of Grigor Andolov.
[Cook.]
Not as smart, not as rich.
Maybe twice as vicious.
Real animals.
And we get back more.
Much more.
[Cook.]
They don't just order murders, they carry them out.
- Thank you.
- You're paying me.
You don't have to thank me.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
I think I'm gonna like him.
You're going to like the way he does his job.
Already do.
He didn't offer an opinion on how we should proceed.
- He wasn't in here "pitching.
" - But had you asked.
Sure.
I imagine he'd have an approach.
I'm asking you though.
It's still money.
Yes.
And we need it.
But If the Kozlovs come on board, that means Grigor has more capital here than the rest of the investors combined.
Gives him too much power.
He may have already gotten us into a position from which there is no escape, only defeat.
Zugzwang, you know? It's what I almost named the firm.
In hopes that it would inspire us to get the other fella in that position.
Anyway, you're right.
If I take the Kozlov money, Grigor is in control.
If I refuse the money, I'm refusing Grigor's wishes.
And he might pull his money, instead of backing me against Axe's threats.
But unlike chess, this isn't just a two-person game, so there must be another option.
We say yes.
- Make the Kozlovs say no.
- How? Well, in order to give me the money, they have to have the money.
It's a good thing you didn't name the firm Zugzwang.
Would have outed how good a player you are.
It's better they don't know.
Better they never know.
I'm glad I know.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
[dramatic music.]
Why's Michael Panay afraid of Bobby Axelrod? I'm afraid of the Brazilian Wandering Spider.
Well, now, see, that makes sense.
Most venomous arachnid in the world.
But Mr.
Panay's phobia doesn't track.
If the pension fund is really his, what on God's green does he have to fear? So my theory is, it's not.
Axe is still handling the fund and Panay's a patsy.
Well, that is a theory.
Flat Earth is too.
Making a comeback.
Only two ways it could've happened.
Axe pulled one over on you or Axe is paying you.
Latter seems a lot more likely.
Seems like old times with you two.
I never took kickbacks.
I originally used Axe Capital because he was the best.
He made money for cops.
And when your antics ruined it, I moved on.
Because at the end of the day, that's what it's all about.
Not about flying private to the Kentucky Derby, huh? I know you get off on seeing fear.
So your balls must be turning sapphire as you wonder why isn't he afraid? Maybe because I've never been to the Kentucky Derby in my life and you're standing here without color of authority.
You're a private citizen now.
Get used to it.
Or don't.
Either way, you can't touch me.
[dramatic music.]
Hey, hey, people, you all know what time it is The fuck you staring at, Gumby? Uhh You're new.
You'll learn.
This is how it works the day after payday.
Giving back money.
Doesn't seem fair.
If you want to stay, that's the way, Gandhi.
- Gumby or - Am I gonna have a fucking problem with you? Good.
I'll see you next Thursday.
[slaps arm.]
[exhales sharply.]
More mommy and me time? No, I think we have an understanding.
I was impressed with how you handled the guys.
We're in the fucking veld.
It's predator or prey.
Choice is clear.
[sighs.]
I used to tend bar in college.
Got hit on by assholes all night long.
It's not that different.
And pays a lot better.
Do you ever worry that at some point the armor won't come off? [Wendy.]
Is that why you need a guy who doesn't beg, takes charge.
Tell me when you find one.
No, but seriously, is that what you want? You mean do I want to sublimate my authority at home? With someone who's masculine in all the right ways but not a douchebag.
Let them take care of me, but make the decisions.
Or do I want to be the shot caller.
Maybe pay all the bills.
And end up with someone who'll swallow that? Yeah.
When I get home from work, if I didn't go drinking, and sometimes even if I did, I lace up the Nikes and I run the West Side Highway until I forget that I want anything at all.
Then I come back here.
What about you? - This isn't - About you.
Sure it's not.
I guess I get out the running shoes from time to time.
[dramatic music.]
Is that always the way you do business? Yeah.
You? Of course.
Seriously, never had an evening that started at a tiki bar end so well.
Well, next time we'll try a luau.
Love to see you in a grass skirt.
Gotta have the legs for it.
I'll have the papers memorializing your piece of the business sent over this afternoon.
Unless you didn't really want to take a stake.
I want it.
Scrounging for equity's not a pick-up move.
Then we'll be in touch.
[elevator bell dings.]
[elevator doors close.]
[dramatic music.]
You get it? I almost pooped myself.
But I think so.
Most of it.
Well, scoop up any other intel you can.
And hold your mud.
[elevator bell dings.]
Hey.
[smooches.]
[horn honking.]
[dramatic music.]
[elevator bell dings.]
Bob? I once remarked you wouldn't even sweat and here you are dry as a bone after a workout.
No workout.
Kelly just stretches me.
[Axe.]
She's the best in the city.
Mm-hmm.
I can have her stay after, take care of you.
Another day maybe.
After we speak about a friend of yours.
Sorry to cut this short.
Of course.
See you.
I don't want to have you in the cross hairs anymore.
Cross hairs only matter if they're sitting atop a weapon.
You're out of office; you no longer have one.
I've been tasked, I have been given a task, by folks who do.
Ah.
So answer this: what happens to you if I take down Raul Gomez? I'd prefer that didn't happen.
And I appreciate the gesture of you coming here to ask.
But we can't just leave it there.
- Because, as I said - You've been tasked.
I have.
[sniffs.]
Is there some other way to satisfy your taskmaster on this? He seems to feel that Raul is using the pension fund the way Chris Stapleton uses Tennessee Whiskey, to slake his thirst.
He's not.
Not in the way your man thinks he is.
Tell me how it really is.
Then we solve it together.
If a solution presents, yes.
The man who sent you after this, is he law enforcement? He is.
How high ranking? They all salute him.
[chuckles.]
That man came up around when Raul did.
He can't like the fact that he's running the most storied police force in the nation for not even a quarter of what Raul makes on the books.
So it's jealousy.
And from where I sit, I usually see jealousy turn into the other thing.
Greed.
[dramatic music.]
Ah.
There may be a way for you to satisfy everyone involved, without hurting anyone.
Everyone wins and no one loses? [chuckles.]
I thought you and I live in the real world.
Maybe Michael Panay loses.
Which, in the scheme of things Yeah.
Not really such a loss.
No.
And if there's a big loser, there has to be a big winner.
Now, who's that gonna be? Take a guess.
You know that scene in Pretty Woman where the salesgirl treats her like garbage, so she marches down the street to another shop, buys absolutely everything, then circles back to the first store just to throw it in their face? [Taylor.]
Well, I'm Julia Roberts, and you're fucked.
You made a big mistake.
Big.
Huge.
- I got all the money I need.
- From where?! [Russian accent.]
None of your fucking business.
[Taylor.]
[normal voice.]
So you can bet the next time I need so much as a checking account, I'm going elsewhere.
Thanks for the koozie, asshole.
[Theo.]
If it was a loan from a Russian bank, I'd see it on my system.
An individual.
Not Grigor, he's an investor The Kozlovs? They use you as their prime Yes.
We've lent them capital, but for infrastructure projects mainly.
[Axe.]
Force a capital call on a few of those projects then.
Pull back the loans.
I want them cash poor on this side of the Atlantic.
Cripple their ability to dole out to Taylor.
That's a big request I can practically feel your hand in my pocket.
I already went in on that dipshit robotics play.
This costs me more, so it costs you more.
Drop Spartan-Ives, make me your main prime.
Well, if you fight for me as hard as you're fighting for your bank that's on the table.
Good enough for me [dramatic music.]
Hey, guys, Theo from Patriot Trust [Theo.]
I know we thought we could extend [Theo.]
that billion-two for a year, but it turns out we need to pull it back.
Fuck you.
When? Immediately.
You guys should come in so we can hammer it out.
[grunts.]
[horns honking.]
[indistinct conversations.]
So, how dirty is my man? Training Day or Prince of the City? Raul is taking money.
You were right.
I smelled it.
You have the evidence I can use to seize his pension? Not exactly.
God damn it, Chuck.
Did I send in the wrong man? In a way.
Because I don't have what you asked for.
But in another way, I know how to get what you really want.
Spit it out.
Keep Raul, have him fire Panay.
Now, why the fuck would I do that? Raul was in his job before you were in yours.
He's not your man.
You do not have an understanding with him.
So you think you won't have an understanding with whatever manager he hires.
And I imagine, as you've gotten older, contemplated your retirement, an understanding seems more and more important to you.
[dramatic music.]
And you think I can get that with whoever Raul hires to replace Panay? I think the new manager and you would be fucking soulmates.
Because I believe that man would be Bobby Axelrod.
[chuckles.]
Oh, you really got down in those NYC sewers.
That's what you get with me.
No fear, of power or alligators.
It's why you and your union are gonna back me for AG.
Thought that might be coming.
It's better for you.
You were saddled with Darcha by baroque rules of New York State succession.
He's not your choice.
He doesn't know how this town really works.
[dramatic music.]
[door closes.]
[inhales sharply.]
Just the one photo? I tossed the ones of me with Chuck.
And I haven't yet had the chance to shake and smile with all the machers.
So no pics with him.
But his words in your mouth.
Okay.
It suits you.
Uh, you still have Darcha on your wish list for state AG? Yes.
I back-channeled with his Chief Of Staff, and he said they have no interest in fighting it out with us.
I think they'll basically do our bidding and back the fuck off when we want 'em to.
Darcha really would have been our ideal man then.
Why "would have been"? He canceled his appearance at San Gennaro tomorrow.
[scoffs.]
What about Sansome? Still appearing.
Hmm.
- [door opens.]
- Motherfuck.
[door closes.]
They pay me then they take the money back.
I can't leave.
They call Immigration It's a story being told over and over inside the ranks of Eureka Building Solutions.
What had once looked like a leader in the industrial cleaning space awaiting a huge valuation, is now rumored to be facing probes by several regulatory agencies [TV turns off.]
That is one powerful piece of journalism.
It is.
And accurate.
It's gone up on the journal's site by now, but I wanted to show it to you personally, since, you know Sure.
It's wrong what that company did to those workers.
They deserve their bread and their roses too.
Tuk did good work here.
Went above and beyond.
He's complaining he still smells like pine cleaner.
Go give him an attaboy, Ben.
Took me three years with you to earn an attaboy.
Then fuck the attaboy.
Did his job.
Got paid.
Move on.
Your guy.
Your call.
I think I'll give him an attaboy [footsteps approaching.]
Move.
Ooh, a She-E-O.
Nice Uh, Axe I was trying to figure out why you invested in that dogshit robotics company.
And if I fucked an idiot or just someone really duplicitous.
Who told you? Patriot Trust Bank.
Trying to drum up more business.
Definitely not switching primes.
[door opens.]
I heard you were denying Taylor Mason leverage.
- I wanted the Street to know.
- [door closes.]
Now I see what's behind everything: Your wrath.
Which I am now going to blunt.
I'm gonna get Taylor their leverage.
That is not what I would call a proportionate response.
Because proportionate responses don't work on nation states like you.
I-I don't care if you lie or obfuscate.
I care when you take profits that should be mine.
Your cleaning company is worth significantly more than it was yesterday.
You know what kind of horrible shit your competition was up to? Of course I did.
And I would've beaten them, in time, through proper business practices.
And now you have.
And my piece would have been worth even more if I didn't cut you in.
Somehow I don't think it would have gone up so quick if you hadn't.
- Really? - Like I told you: I'm a value add.
Give me back the shares, fucko.
[laughing.]
I paid you handsomely.
You can buy me out at current value.
Take the rest of the ride yourself.
If you want to be rid of me that badly.
Fine.
Half my shares back.
Well, as you said, they're worth more now.
- So what price, uh - I get the profit on those.
You get only your initial investment back on 'em.
And I let you have a clear shot at Taylor Mason.
[inhales sharply.]
Expensive But worth it.
Good.
Done.
And we'll take the rest of this ride together.
By the way, you got bigger.
You now have 4,200 new and hard-working employees ready to step aboard your cleaning company.
Our company.
Now what? You hungry? I could eat.
[knock on door.]
[Chuck.]
Come in.
Donna didn't announce the United States Attorney for the Southern District.
She must've stepped out.
And that's when you stepped in.
Ah.
Always angle-shooting.
Shooting angles.
Important difference.
You taught me that.
- Should I go? - Nah.
I'm just getting warm.
- Ahh.
- I know what you're doing.
And I'm here to tell you, don't.
Don't do it.
Don't run.
You didn't come to plead.
You came to threaten.
So hit me with the back half.
I've been keeping out of your way as much as possible.
What do you call reviewing all my old cases? My duty.
But like I said, I've been holding back the full power of my office.
[Connerty.]
And I think you know what that power is.
[Connerty.]
What it can do.
So if you run, if you try to again put yourself in a position of public trust and public authority, I will be forced to let slip the dogs of war.
Oh, that one I definitely taught you.
Yeah.
That's the one I used on Axelrod to get him to make his first mistake.
Sometimes you learn from the worst.
You didn't need to bring out the needle to nudge me.
I was running.
I am running.
And when I win, I'm gonna roll over you like it's Tiananmen Square.
[bones crack.]
[groans.]
[door opens.]
[Slaid Cleaves' "If I Had A Heart" plays over speakers.]
[indistinct conversations.]
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.
So, how's it work at a quant overlay? Am I still gonna be an analyst or I'm sorry, man.
I can't do it.
The more I read Taylor blocked it.
The dumber I think I am They're like the HAL 9000 or Rain Man.
They're always playing the percentages.
Yeah, they're not.
They see everything.
It's why they did what they did with Axe, despite the risk.
Why they brought me here and put a lot of faith in me and why I gotta say no.
You're blocking me? I think you're a great dude.
If I was 13 again, I would play Magic: The Gathering with you, like, every day at lunch.
But when you're a man, you gotta put childish things away at work.
I got responsibilities now.
Like you said, I'm a partner.
And in these times you remind me Of the man I used to be You're a fucking asshole.
You think you're better than me.
I don't think I'm better than you.
I'm just better at my job.
And I will definitely figure out what an appropriate baby gift is and send one.
Seen the bashing of brains Seen the city unwind Seen the overthrow of dictators and tyrants [dramatic music.]
You ready? You want me to go with you? Or send Cook.
No.
I have to face Grigor alone.
I hope he doesn't recognize that I did it.
What are the chances of that? If he does know, he's either going to take them out or take me out.
[soft music playing on piano.]
Garlic pepper and dill for you.
Horseradish for me.
[vodka pours, glasses clink.]
[glass thuds.]
[Grigor.]
I bring what to most would be bad news.
The Kozlovs, the men who wanted to give you money, have had some reversals and no longer have money to give.
I suppose that is bad news.
For me.
[Taylor.]
But for you these friends are overextended.
Perhaps you could rescue them or and I'm just thinking out loud here take them out.
[Taylor.]
They are vulnerable.
Prone.
You could buy all their assets for pennies on the dollar.
Your idea of fun is to dangle my friends in front of Axe and watch him feed on them? I'm feeding them to you.
Axe just cut 'em down into digestible bites.
This is a course of action only the nastiest of the Bratva would take.
It is also what I thought you might say, and do.
[glasses thud.]
All this raises the question: The Kozlovs, how good friends are they really? It turns out not so good.
I accept this most gracious gift.
And in return, you hope what, that the leverage you so crave will now come directly from me? I think you like that Axe has shut the banks to me.
Because it makes me more reliant on you.
That ends now.
Like the once great American Bob Ritchie said: "You can knock me down and watch me bleed.
But you can't keep no chains on me.
" The Kid Rock.
I admire him greatly.
I need independent leverage.
You'll use your influence to open the banks back up to me.
This I do.
[dramatic music.]
"Only God Knows Why.
" [Italian music playing over speakers.]
[indistinct conversations.]
[bell rings.]
- Oh? - Yeah, yeah.
[bell rings.]
Here.
Can you just give me one second? Yeah.
So glad the fund's coming back to Axe Capital, where it belongs.
Somehow you always seem to get what you want.
Pure luck.
[bell rings.]
[priest.]
from the scourge of spreading disbelief.
[priest.]
Free us from all evils [priest.]
and dangers that threaten us from every side.
[bell rings.]
[priest.]
May the faith for which you sacrifice You sure you're ready for the glare of public life again? You're good at working in the shadows.
Don't worry about me, buddy boy.
[priest.]
the Lord our God can rightfully expect from His servants.
Amen.
[cheers and applause.]
Thank you, Father.
Thank you, Father! I think there's one thing we can all agree upon as New Yorkers.
Someone always wants something from ya.
Someone's always hocking ya.
'Help me.
Support me.
Endorse me.
' Well, maybe you've noticed.
I don't do a lot of endorsing.
Until someone like the next guy comes along.
Then I'm practically hocking him.
I've seen the good he's done to clean up the streets of Gotham.
And I can't wait to see what he's gonna do for the rest of New York State.
I give you your next Attorney General Chuck Rhoades! [cheers and applause.]
- [Chuck.]
Wonderful.
Thank you.
- [Sansome.]
You bet.
- Thank you.
- All right.
Thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am so proud to be here with you tonight.
In fact, "I am chomping at the bit to be your next Attorney General"! - Yes! - [cheers and applause.]
[laughing.]
Okay.
[wolf-whistles.]
[Italian music playing over speakers.]
[cheers and applause continue.]
Yeah! [Gang of Youths' "The Heart Is a Muscle".]
Break me off a piece of that And mix it in with a little wine With someone warm and smart I guess With a heart in first And a soul behind And I Won't give in 'Cause I Wanna try again
Previously on Billions On power of the President, you are fired! [Jock.]
Mr.
Connerty, as your first detail [Jock.]
as United States Attorney for the Southern District, please show this gentleman out.
The palace coup is complete.
I did what I had to do to survive.
And to win.
You have to know that anything I do to stop you is warranted.
[Axe.]
Rudy, you're fired.
For fraternizing.
[Axe.]
With our sworn fucking enemies.
You will move assets how and when I tell you.
[Axe.]
Your 2 and 20 is now 1 and 10.
[Axe.]
The rest will be paid to me.
You are now officially but unofficially the proud owner of half of my half of Panay's fund.
It's time to put away childish enthusiasms.
[Troy.]
They left me no choice.
Said they were going to destroy my business, my life.
Most of your major cases are being put under review by Connerty.
Your name will be ruined.
And Epstein's vacated New York Attorney General's seat [Chuck.]
is there for me.
He owed me a favor.
Yeah.
As I do now.
You got that carry permit you were looking for.
We need to be certain no money is going [Wags.]
to ex-employees of Axe Capital Please stop fucking with Taylor Mason.
[Grigor.]
Forget all about them.
But be sure you don't forget about me.
[Wags.]
He's a Russian Oligarch.
[Wags.]
But you, mon frère, are a motherfucking American Oligarch.
You will not relent.
Taylor must pay.
We have to do it without Grigor getting a whiff of us.
[Axe.]
We don't put out this fire by pouring water on it.
But by sucking oxygen out of the room.
Completely.
[dramatic music.]
[mechanical whirring, clanging.]
This is the competition's [whirring, clanging continues.]
[Theo.]
Not exactly RoboCop.
But until now, considered state of the art.
Ooh, money just walked in.
[Wags.]
Rebecca Cantu.
Oh.
So that's what a rich person looks like.
I'd always wondered.
But check out this badass our company built.
Brains like Will Hunting, strength like Artis Gilmore in the ABA days.
- [mechanical whirring.]
- Ooh.
[door thuds.]
Which is why Patriot Trust Bank is proud to be doing this raise for you.
I'll let the scientists who made him tell you how and why later on, but I want you to know that we are committed to helping put one of these in every company loading bay, and eventually, every home in America.
What size investments are available? My kind of question.
We're looking for no more than five firms to fulfill $100 mil in this C round, [Theo.]
which comes with anti-dilution rights.
Anything else? [Rebecca.]
The, um The noise signature, that hum, uh, makes me believe there's a combustion engine inside there.
Rebecca, this product wasn't hand-delivered to you early, so I'll forgive you for not having your research in order.
We have a proprietary power source.
[company CEO.]
It's one of the reasons we're set apart.
Anyone else have a question? Oh.
It's proprietary.
That It Thanks.
Withdrawn.
I'm sorry.
Over the line, Smokey.
Forfeit your turn.
- [Wags.]
Mark it zero.
- Not how it's gonna go.
Of course, proprietary doesn't tell us shit, does it.
I grew up with a mechanic for a father.
So, uh, forgive me.
That's definitely a combustion engine.
[Rebecca.]
And that won't work for the military.
[Rebecca.]
So you'll have to improve the battery technology, but the, uh, the margins on this thing are already thin as Kate Moss on a juice fast.
[Theo.]
The money taken in today will go a long way in offsetting any costs we might incur Mm.
It doesn't know how to walk.
I don't know what you were looking at.
There's no remote.
No human control at all.
But it's not actually stable, right? It's metastable.
I've seen this demo a dozen times.
Hasn't fallen hasn't even stumbled once.
Well, you could hold a curling match on this floor.
But, um, what about [Rebecca.]
now Can we run it again? [laughter.]
Any other questions? Whoa.
They shoulda had you inside the tent.
Could've trouble shot it, helped launch it.
I don't launch shit products.
Lucky she was here, or we might've actually gone in on that loser.
So, straight back to the office Oh no Axe, look, I know this may still seem a little bleeding edge It's the Mechanical Turk.
But at least that beat people at chess before the con was revealed.
This company has real consumer potential Yet this bank is invested in this because the chairman's son was in the Spee with the Chief Tech Officer.
Or some bullshit like that.
He told you to deliver.
That's why you've been doing all the talking today, because it matters to you.
But now you're gonna have trouble salvaging anyone else in this room.
If it makes your life easier, I'll take a piece.
You will? That's great But there's something that matters to me that I need in return.
Won't cost you a penny.
Will even save you some [dramatic music.]
This is gonna be a time of great prosperity for us both.
So I'm glad to continue To renew [Axe.]
To start our friendship.
I know your bank would have liked the other business [Axe.]
But I'm touched that you prefer mine.
Based on a number of factors Including the brevity of your track record - Alto Bank - Bank Allemane Patriot Trust Bank can't extend you leverage at this juncture.
Thank you for your time.
Here.
Have a koozie.
[dramatic music.]
I can set you more meetings.
No.
I've seen more eyes go cold on me than Agent Bill Tench did in a whole season.
Axe got to all of the bankers.
- I'm done.
- I should have gone.
You don't have time to waste on that shit.
It's not time that's the problem.
It's capital.
Winston and the quant team have a huge stat arb opportunity that I'm gonna have to leave on the table if we don't lock in leverage by end of week.
I can't let Axe cause that.
- You have an idea? - Not even a notion.
Yet.
But I will.
We will.
[dramatic music.]
He actually invested in the piece of shit Believe me, I was excited that we were getting into Private Equitatus, but badly built robots Private equity, Spyros.
Maybe just show me your mood ring if you want me to know how you feel.
Or don't.
Because I don't give a shit.
[Wags.]
But if we go in on crappy companies just to get the return favor of fucking over Taylor Mason, it's gonna be a hard sell to our investors [Wags.]
on the wisdom of the idea.
At a certain point, the Street's gonna start wondering if you care more about revenge than making money.
And so do I.
Leave.
[dignified.]
I serve at your pleasure.
And so do I.
Meaning: I feel the same way he does.
If you burn cash and have down quarters just to hurt Taylor, you're Neil McCauley throwing it all away to kill Waingro in that motel.
I can't stand by and let that happen.
For a minute there, you're glad that Neil allows himself to feel.
But then, yeah, his one moment of humanity kills him.
But this isn't that.
We're mixing into private equity.
For real.
And I got everybody downstairs generating ideas.
But you haven't said yes to any of them yet.
They have a dozen internal ideas you've turned down.
- 'Cause they all suck.
- They can't all suck.
What we need is a meaningful partnership.
And I know how to find it [dramatic music.]
Helena, could you have the team put together a list of all the private companies Rebecca Cantu is invested in.
Ah, shit, Wags.
You really know your man.
I never asked to be your Attorney General.
I'm just a small-town lawyer who was called to serve.
And that's what I did.
Under our last AG, Alvin Epstein, who felt the call to duty in DC.
[Darcha.]
But now that fate and the New York State Legislature [Darcha.]
have made me the Interim Attorney General I'm asking you to let me see this mission through You think he's got what it takes? - [Darcha.]
and keep serving.
- To win? Well, he's starting with the job.
As natural advantages go, that's a good start.
And if he gets it? His rep is: he stays in his own side of the sandbox.
Well, if he's not gonna scrap with us over jurisdiction and for cases, he's my kind of candidate - Mm-hmm.
- Mm.
[Darcha.]
and to the people of New York.
- [Darcha.]
Thanks to the tireless - Look at him.
Champing at the bit to keep the reins of power now that he has them.
- Don't do that.
- What? If you're talking to people, it's chomp.
But it's not that.
It's from the poem: "Twelve beauteous steeds, of golden color and with golden manes, Champ at the bit.
" Champ.
Champ.
We can go home now.
Voters don't want William Safire.
They want an Attorney General who talks like he's actually from New York.
[Darcha.]
this effort and the progress we've made.
There's still The concealed carry for your client personally taken care of.
- Hand-stamped for approval.
- Thank you.
Let me know if he needs a lesson.
I'll take him to Tiro myself Why do I feel an ask is coming? 'Cause you're a bright boy.
And contract makes the world go 'round.
Okay.
What's up in this rotation? The police pension fund.
I need an independent look at the administrator, Raul Gomez.
Funds unaccounted for? I don't have access to the books, but after 20 as a cop and years of restrained living, he's suddenly got a NetJets account.
He flew private down to the Derby.
Uh huh.
You do, as they say, have people for that.
Whilst I am merely a humble barrister with no particular portfolio.
When cops get going investigating cops, they're worse than scamps in a sewing circle.
As you well know, Chick.
Which is why I'm coming to you.
And to insulate yourself.
Raul Gomez is a man with a lot of friends, many inside your very department.
Some might even be more loyal to him than to you and wouldn't hesitate to lash out at little ol' me.
- Thank you, and bless you.
- [applause.]
Now, who's gonna look after Rhoades if that comes to pass? [camera shutter clicks.]
You know how to take care of yourself.
And even if you aren't one, you operate like an insider.
Who's better at tracking down and punishing financial wrongdoing than you? Well, I didn't have you as a flatterer.
I'm whatever I need to be.
- Nice to see you.
- [indistinct conversations.]
Now I gotta be a rabbi.
Excuse me.
Oh.
Guiding your boy to the top seat? No.
He's not my boy.
Yet.
He's new to certain parts of this life, so I need to see him in action before I decide.
Do what I ask and you'll graduate from cadging pop gun permits for big players to becoming one yourself again.
[dramatic music.]
You looking for the endorsement of the Police Commissioner to catapult you into the race? I want his men.
I want their votes.
And I want the visual of them bathing me in all that blue.
[indistinct conversations.]
Cleaning Cleaning what? Uh w-wages I remember him speaking English when we hired him.
Maybe it'll come back after we punt him into the Hudson.
Eureka Building Solutions.
New big national janitorial services company.
Thousands of employees.
They're chewing up the competition, undercutting all bids.
Best margins in the industry.
Is that what motormouth was going on about? [Ben Kim.]
Tuk has relatives without green cards, only temporary work visas, who work for Eureka.
They get paid 16 bucks an hour, plus benefits.
What's the thing? Company forces them to kick back salary, off the books.
Benefits aren't real.
[Ben Kim.]
They're really getting paid less than minimum wage.
If they complain, the company jams them up with ICE.
And the chief investor in their main competitor, Manifest Cleaning Services, seems to be Rebecca Cantu.
We were told to look for overlapping businesses.
But Eureka's a private company, so we can't short it But we can burn it to the ground, [Axe.]
leaving Rebecca's company to own the market.
Tuk, you're about to go get a job Will you set a dinner with Rebecca Cantu? Oh.
Yay.
- Can we go somewhere meaty? - Actually, you know what? I'll call and set it myself.
For two.
[Fred Eaglesmith's "Been a Long Time".]
[phone receiver beeps.]
[Axe.]
Helena, will you get Rebecca Cantu? - It's been a long time - [man.]
Roni Supreme for ya.
It's been a long time Do you mind if I eat before you? I don't like to take a long lunch hour.
This is actually the first time I've left the office during lunch.
You're a partner, you can't live a little? Yeah.
No.
You're right.
I've got a very small equity piece so technically It's been a long while I'm sorry about what happened to you.
Sure has been a long, long while - Was it really out of the blue? - Kinda.
I mean, when you're almost fired so many times and then not you start to believe you're Willis in Unbreakable.
Right until they shatter your heart into a million pieces.
- Ah, shit man.
- No one there will talk to me.
I think because they assumed I'd walk across the river and take a job with you guys.
- So - I was trying to make you How's it going at Taylor Mason Capital? Fine.
Good.
New firm.
Strikes and gutters, ya know, but I need a job, man.
My attorney said my non-compete isn't binding.
And Axe Cap isn't gonna fight it anyway.
So I'm coming to you because you know what I can do.
You know you can count on me.
And my wife is super pregnant.
Done.
Taken care of.
Really? I gotta talk to the team, but, like you said, I have ownership interest.
I'm employee number one or two.
Is Taylor an employee? Doesn't matter.
The point is I got you.
[electronic music.]
Mr.
Panay.
Smart of you to accept my invitation to discuss the police pension fund.
[sighs.]
Surely me stalking through your office would raise questions you wouldn't want to answer.
Or perhaps just whispers that might escape your walls.
I agreed to meet you here so I could leave when I wanted to.
We may already have arrived at that moment.
Well, if you've nothing to hide, what's your rush? I'm managing more money than God and bringing in better returns than He did last year.
So that doesn't leave me a lot of time to deal with a man strutting around on phantom limbs.
I know damn well you got cut off at the knees.
Time's a fickle beast.
Why, a year ago, I had legions at my command while your fund was deflating like a Tijuana breast implant.
Hell, I wouldn't be surprised [Chuck.]
if you were Googling how to tie a noose.
And yet through some act of prestidigitation, you wound up with a lifeline instead.
[dramatic music.]
Now, it's possible that the God whose ass you are kicking on the board took pity on you.
But I think it's more likely that Raul Gomez saw a desperate man that he could manipulate.
So tell me how's it work? Is he invading the principal? Or are you just kicking back to him? [chuckles.]
Raul is as clean as they come.
He pulled the pension fund from Axe Cap [Panay.]
the second Axelrod's legal troubles set in.
And then he picked me because I am a paragon of business ethics.
You do know that Axe was in that legal trouble because I put him there.
[Panay.]
But he survived.
He always does.
How come you don't know that by now? And for the record, I didn't even mean to mention his name.
There is no record.
Why does mentioning his name concern you, friend? You have no business with him, do you? Just don't want it to seem like I'm gloating that I took from him, is all.
[Chuck.]
Hmm.
Is that the thing? You took from him? Or is there more to it? This game can be cutthroat.
That's it.
Uh-huh.
Hmm.
Okay.
Thanks for coming in, Mr.
Panay.
[keys clacking.]
I came across a tantalizing tidbit during my daily rounds.
It's Bonnie's birthday That's the tidbit? No.
She was contacted by a certain former Axe Cap employee whom I'll just call "Mafee.
" And "Mafee" invited her to celebratory drinks.
She declined, but she didn't officially report it.
Still not sharing.
And let me guess how you came across this morsel: In addition to reading all the e-mails flagged for possible compliance violations, you're also perusing any sent to eligible females in our employ.
Eternal vigilance is the price of liberty.
As the head of HR, I really need to ask you to cut that the fuck out.
Axe Cap emails are not your personal Penthouse Forum.
Is Bonnie still here? She's doing a B-day shindizzle with some of the people here - Are you going? - It's for the psilikatzides.
Small timers.
You weren't invited.
Neither were you.
- Wait, are you going? - Come on.
Shut up.
[The Commodores' "Brick House" plays over speakers.]
Mm, mm, mm Hi! Oh, come on.
This one's classic, right? Ow, she's a brick house You got a problem with the 'Commodes?' Was expecting you to bring more Steely Dan.
Oh.
I hold back the top shelf for my birthday.
- She's a brick - Uhh, - House - oww.
The adults are here to party! Ain't holding nothing back Ow, she's a brick house Happy birthday! Well put-together, everybody knows this is [Natalie Merchant's "Wonder" plays over speakers.]
They say I must be one of the wonders Of God's own creation This one's mine! And they smile as they see they can offer No explanation Got any other celebrations planned? Didn't plan this one.
People like to fete me.
And you let them? I don't know.
If I feel like a drank.
Anyone you don't feel like drinking with? [chuckles.]
Okay, I know why you're here.
'Cause that laxtard Mafee tried to sniff my panties.
I shut that shit down.
I don't need to report everything I do to mommy but why is mommy spying on my shit? I'm the head of HR, email correspondence hits me even when I'm not looking for it.
Uh huh.
So, my emails just happened This isn't all about you.
We are all as sick as our secrets.
So stop keeping 'em.
I will if you stop snooping.
Faith - She'll make her way - Deal.
She'll make her way Topper.
What's the matter with you? - I've got work early tomorrow.
- People see me Yeah.
We all do [chuckling.]
Oh, right.
The other work.
Sorry, bud.
- Topper.
- I'm over your heads, how I confound you and astound you To know I must be one of the wonders What's that mean? - COAT?! The fuck is that? - Of God's own creation It means "Chance of Action Tonight.
" Coat.
[chuckles.]
Who were you writing that to? - My wife.
- Oh.
Puke.
In assessing nocturnal options, whether to keep drinking, head home, or squeeze in a tight little karaoke set, [Spyros.]
it is good to know the likelihood of success with your special lady.
Sexually.
Well, assuming you pay her cash, chance should be north of 100.
I can assure you, I do not pay for it.
- No.
You just beg for it.
- [laughs.]
- Sometimes.
- Sometimes it works! Maybe for you and you only.
But not for your wife.
What you guys don't seem to realize with all of your begging and whining is: Act like a man, sometimes a girl just needs to get railed.
Don't you agree? Nobody wants to fuck a sexual panhandler.
[laughter.]
So how does it work in your bedroom? Know this child will be gifted With love, with patience and with faith Action whenever either of us fucking wants it.
- Okay.
- Oh! - Yes.
- Yeah! - That's it.
- Cheers! - Come on! - Yeah! - [laughter.]
- She'll make her way [serene music playing over speakers.]
[knock on door.]
[keypad beeps.]
May I? Tai chi.
The dance of the yin and yang.
You ever practice? In my day, I have tried it all.
But I always come back to brute force.
[music stops.]
Much like Mr.
Axelrod.
You've heard about my banking problems.
Yes.
And like your Mighty Mouse, Here I come to save the day.
By providing me leverage.
Yes.
And no.
There are friends I have.
Uh, they do similar work, they come from a similar place.
Brothers.
The Kozlovs.
And they're looking to get more of their money into the West.
So you've done me the favor of finding the leverage And you will do me the favor of being most hospitable to my friends.
I'll look into it.
Yes.
Look before you leap.
So long as in the end, you leap.
[dramatic music.]
[Gang of Youths' "The Heart Is A Muscle" playing.]
I will look at love as more than - You're in a select club.
- Just an instrument of pain Female billionaires not named Oprah? Sure.
But I meant people who have stopped me from making an investment.
I'm not usually so easy to dissuade.
You seem pretty easy.
If you keep pouring like that I will be.
No, but really, thank you.
I might've been fooled by that robotics demo.
I happen to be expert in that.
That's the thing about doing what I do.
You're in these investments for so long, you really can't take any chances.
I have to dive deep into all these companies, really understand what the businesses are doing.
I'm counting on that.
Well [chuckles.]
I'm not gonna carry your fucking water.
[chuckling.]
I don't expect you to.
What if I want to partner with you? I'm not raising.
You're really not taking on any money? Opening a new fund in a couple months.
We could talk then.
Maybe we don't go through the fund.
You got a personal piece of everything, right? So break me off a piece of your piece.
What are you high on from the last batch? A bottled cocktail company.
A better mousetrap for backend webforms.
Uh, an industrial custodial company, but that one's fully subscribed.
Then that's the one I want.
Why, 'cause it's so sexy? Hmm? While there's speakers in the outfield I wasn't doing the conman thing.
I wasn't telling you that there's no opportunity so that the scarcity would get you to implore me for a way in.
It really is full.
Well, even if it's not a game, I believe in your confidence.
How much of the company do you have? Say half.
I'll take it.
Not on your charmed life.
Half of your half.
At 1.
5x the market price.
To love someone What's behind the mighty hankering for that specific deal? If you're that deep in it, I know it's the one.
Men in business.
It was a steady stream of no's and rejections, first from my bosses, then when I went looking for capital.
And now that I don't need you, you all want to chip off a piece.
I can promise you: I'm a value add.
Yeah, I don't doubt that for some reason.
The heart is a muscle and Is that what made you leave the shopping network and go out on your own, shitty male bosses? They hired me to pick the products.
The ones I rolled out were stone winners.
Yet I still had to fight them.
[Rebecca.]
Eventually I couldn't handle them [Rebecca.]
not listening to my ideas.
How basic they thought.
How slow they moved.
The way I heard it, you started hoarding all the best products instead of putting them in the system.
That way you had 'em when you launched on your own.
Well, if that were true, how could I have kicked their ass in the lawsuit they brought? I wanna be loved I wanna be whole again I saw value.
I took.
So tuck my hair behind my ears You think that makes me bad? The window is wide Yeah.
I do.
In the best way.
'Cause I-I-I-I wanna overcome [Rebecca moaning.]
And try-y-y-y to love someone [soft music.]
[exhales deeply.]
Mm.
Can I get the box? This is working for me.
[sighs.]
[breathing heavily.]
Please? [exhales sharply.]
[Chuck snoring quietly.]
[birds chirping.]
How the hell did you find me It wasn't easy.
It wasn't meant to be.
You know I'm not my father-in-law.
Yet you're here.
You tracked me down.
What do you want? You once told me you knew people who switched it up.
Reversed who was dominant.
Changed styles altogether.
Yes.
They were role players.
Experimenting.
So, yes, they switched, from time to time, moved off of bondage altogether.
Tried exhibitionism, voyeurism.
Other forms of play But that's not Chuck, not his arousal template.
For him it's not a game.
It's rooted deep.
Thank you.
Don't thank me.
Just don't come back.
[dramatic music.]
[keys clacking.]
Hey, I wanted to ask you I need to deal with something.
Is it urgent? No, it's a personnel thing.
Someone I want to bring in.
Anyone you think meets our hiring criteria and fits our culture goes to the top of the list.
Well, I don't know if he's top-of-the-list.
- It's Rudy.
- You think we need a mascot? I think he'd be a net positive.
He never really got a shot to show what he could do.
If you think I didn't coach him up well enough, - have at it.
- I-I didn't mean You are a vital and valued member of this firm.
And if you want to bring Rudy on, under you, and take responsibility for him blooming, you have my full blessing.
Excuse me.
[sighs.]
Report.
Here's the brief.
Tl;dr, please.
The Kozlovs They're a rougher, messier version of Grigor Andolov.
[Cook.]
Not as smart, not as rich.
Maybe twice as vicious.
Real animals.
And we get back more.
Much more.
[Cook.]
They don't just order murders, they carry them out.
- Thank you.
- You're paying me.
You don't have to thank me.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
I think I'm gonna like him.
You're going to like the way he does his job.
Already do.
He didn't offer an opinion on how we should proceed.
- He wasn't in here "pitching.
" - But had you asked.
Sure.
I imagine he'd have an approach.
I'm asking you though.
It's still money.
Yes.
And we need it.
But If the Kozlovs come on board, that means Grigor has more capital here than the rest of the investors combined.
Gives him too much power.
He may have already gotten us into a position from which there is no escape, only defeat.
Zugzwang, you know? It's what I almost named the firm.
In hopes that it would inspire us to get the other fella in that position.
Anyway, you're right.
If I take the Kozlov money, Grigor is in control.
If I refuse the money, I'm refusing Grigor's wishes.
And he might pull his money, instead of backing me against Axe's threats.
But unlike chess, this isn't just a two-person game, so there must be another option.
We say yes.
- Make the Kozlovs say no.
- How? Well, in order to give me the money, they have to have the money.
It's a good thing you didn't name the firm Zugzwang.
Would have outed how good a player you are.
It's better they don't know.
Better they never know.
I'm glad I know.
[door opens.]
[door closes.]
[dramatic music.]
Why's Michael Panay afraid of Bobby Axelrod? I'm afraid of the Brazilian Wandering Spider.
Well, now, see, that makes sense.
Most venomous arachnid in the world.
But Mr.
Panay's phobia doesn't track.
If the pension fund is really his, what on God's green does he have to fear? So my theory is, it's not.
Axe is still handling the fund and Panay's a patsy.
Well, that is a theory.
Flat Earth is too.
Making a comeback.
Only two ways it could've happened.
Axe pulled one over on you or Axe is paying you.
Latter seems a lot more likely.
Seems like old times with you two.
I never took kickbacks.
I originally used Axe Capital because he was the best.
He made money for cops.
And when your antics ruined it, I moved on.
Because at the end of the day, that's what it's all about.
Not about flying private to the Kentucky Derby, huh? I know you get off on seeing fear.
So your balls must be turning sapphire as you wonder why isn't he afraid? Maybe because I've never been to the Kentucky Derby in my life and you're standing here without color of authority.
You're a private citizen now.
Get used to it.
Or don't.
Either way, you can't touch me.
[dramatic music.]
Hey, hey, people, you all know what time it is The fuck you staring at, Gumby? Uhh You're new.
You'll learn.
This is how it works the day after payday.
Giving back money.
Doesn't seem fair.
If you want to stay, that's the way, Gandhi.
- Gumby or - Am I gonna have a fucking problem with you? Good.
I'll see you next Thursday.
[slaps arm.]
[exhales sharply.]
More mommy and me time? No, I think we have an understanding.
I was impressed with how you handled the guys.
We're in the fucking veld.
It's predator or prey.
Choice is clear.
[sighs.]
I used to tend bar in college.
Got hit on by assholes all night long.
It's not that different.
And pays a lot better.
Do you ever worry that at some point the armor won't come off? [Wendy.]
Is that why you need a guy who doesn't beg, takes charge.
Tell me when you find one.
No, but seriously, is that what you want? You mean do I want to sublimate my authority at home? With someone who's masculine in all the right ways but not a douchebag.
Let them take care of me, but make the decisions.
Or do I want to be the shot caller.
Maybe pay all the bills.
And end up with someone who'll swallow that? Yeah.
When I get home from work, if I didn't go drinking, and sometimes even if I did, I lace up the Nikes and I run the West Side Highway until I forget that I want anything at all.
Then I come back here.
What about you? - This isn't - About you.
Sure it's not.
I guess I get out the running shoes from time to time.
[dramatic music.]
Is that always the way you do business? Yeah.
You? Of course.
Seriously, never had an evening that started at a tiki bar end so well.
Well, next time we'll try a luau.
Love to see you in a grass skirt.
Gotta have the legs for it.
I'll have the papers memorializing your piece of the business sent over this afternoon.
Unless you didn't really want to take a stake.
I want it.
Scrounging for equity's not a pick-up move.
Then we'll be in touch.
[elevator bell dings.]
[elevator doors close.]
[dramatic music.]
You get it? I almost pooped myself.
But I think so.
Most of it.
Well, scoop up any other intel you can.
And hold your mud.
[elevator bell dings.]
Hey.
[smooches.]
[horn honking.]
[dramatic music.]
[elevator bell dings.]
Bob? I once remarked you wouldn't even sweat and here you are dry as a bone after a workout.
No workout.
Kelly just stretches me.
[Axe.]
She's the best in the city.
Mm-hmm.
I can have her stay after, take care of you.
Another day maybe.
After we speak about a friend of yours.
Sorry to cut this short.
Of course.
See you.
I don't want to have you in the cross hairs anymore.
Cross hairs only matter if they're sitting atop a weapon.
You're out of office; you no longer have one.
I've been tasked, I have been given a task, by folks who do.
Ah.
So answer this: what happens to you if I take down Raul Gomez? I'd prefer that didn't happen.
And I appreciate the gesture of you coming here to ask.
But we can't just leave it there.
- Because, as I said - You've been tasked.
I have.
[sniffs.]
Is there some other way to satisfy your taskmaster on this? He seems to feel that Raul is using the pension fund the way Chris Stapleton uses Tennessee Whiskey, to slake his thirst.
He's not.
Not in the way your man thinks he is.
Tell me how it really is.
Then we solve it together.
If a solution presents, yes.
The man who sent you after this, is he law enforcement? He is.
How high ranking? They all salute him.
[chuckles.]
That man came up around when Raul did.
He can't like the fact that he's running the most storied police force in the nation for not even a quarter of what Raul makes on the books.
So it's jealousy.
And from where I sit, I usually see jealousy turn into the other thing.
Greed.
[dramatic music.]
Ah.
There may be a way for you to satisfy everyone involved, without hurting anyone.
Everyone wins and no one loses? [chuckles.]
I thought you and I live in the real world.
Maybe Michael Panay loses.
Which, in the scheme of things Yeah.
Not really such a loss.
No.
And if there's a big loser, there has to be a big winner.
Now, who's that gonna be? Take a guess.
You know that scene in Pretty Woman where the salesgirl treats her like garbage, so she marches down the street to another shop, buys absolutely everything, then circles back to the first store just to throw it in their face? [Taylor.]
Well, I'm Julia Roberts, and you're fucked.
You made a big mistake.
Big.
Huge.
- I got all the money I need.
- From where?! [Russian accent.]
None of your fucking business.
[Taylor.]
[normal voice.]
So you can bet the next time I need so much as a checking account, I'm going elsewhere.
Thanks for the koozie, asshole.
[Theo.]
If it was a loan from a Russian bank, I'd see it on my system.
An individual.
Not Grigor, he's an investor The Kozlovs? They use you as their prime Yes.
We've lent them capital, but for infrastructure projects mainly.
[Axe.]
Force a capital call on a few of those projects then.
Pull back the loans.
I want them cash poor on this side of the Atlantic.
Cripple their ability to dole out to Taylor.
That's a big request I can practically feel your hand in my pocket.
I already went in on that dipshit robotics play.
This costs me more, so it costs you more.
Drop Spartan-Ives, make me your main prime.
Well, if you fight for me as hard as you're fighting for your bank that's on the table.
Good enough for me [dramatic music.]
Hey, guys, Theo from Patriot Trust [Theo.]
I know we thought we could extend [Theo.]
that billion-two for a year, but it turns out we need to pull it back.
Fuck you.
When? Immediately.
You guys should come in so we can hammer it out.
[grunts.]
[horns honking.]
[indistinct conversations.]
So, how dirty is my man? Training Day or Prince of the City? Raul is taking money.
You were right.
I smelled it.
You have the evidence I can use to seize his pension? Not exactly.
God damn it, Chuck.
Did I send in the wrong man? In a way.
Because I don't have what you asked for.
But in another way, I know how to get what you really want.
Spit it out.
Keep Raul, have him fire Panay.
Now, why the fuck would I do that? Raul was in his job before you were in yours.
He's not your man.
You do not have an understanding with him.
So you think you won't have an understanding with whatever manager he hires.
And I imagine, as you've gotten older, contemplated your retirement, an understanding seems more and more important to you.
[dramatic music.]
And you think I can get that with whoever Raul hires to replace Panay? I think the new manager and you would be fucking soulmates.
Because I believe that man would be Bobby Axelrod.
[chuckles.]
Oh, you really got down in those NYC sewers.
That's what you get with me.
No fear, of power or alligators.
It's why you and your union are gonna back me for AG.
Thought that might be coming.
It's better for you.
You were saddled with Darcha by baroque rules of New York State succession.
He's not your choice.
He doesn't know how this town really works.
[dramatic music.]
[door closes.]
[inhales sharply.]
Just the one photo? I tossed the ones of me with Chuck.
And I haven't yet had the chance to shake and smile with all the machers.
So no pics with him.
But his words in your mouth.
Okay.
It suits you.
Uh, you still have Darcha on your wish list for state AG? Yes.
I back-channeled with his Chief Of Staff, and he said they have no interest in fighting it out with us.
I think they'll basically do our bidding and back the fuck off when we want 'em to.
Darcha really would have been our ideal man then.
Why "would have been"? He canceled his appearance at San Gennaro tomorrow.
[scoffs.]
What about Sansome? Still appearing.
Hmm.
- [door opens.]
- Motherfuck.
[door closes.]
They pay me then they take the money back.
I can't leave.
They call Immigration It's a story being told over and over inside the ranks of Eureka Building Solutions.
What had once looked like a leader in the industrial cleaning space awaiting a huge valuation, is now rumored to be facing probes by several regulatory agencies [TV turns off.]
That is one powerful piece of journalism.
It is.
And accurate.
It's gone up on the journal's site by now, but I wanted to show it to you personally, since, you know Sure.
It's wrong what that company did to those workers.
They deserve their bread and their roses too.
Tuk did good work here.
Went above and beyond.
He's complaining he still smells like pine cleaner.
Go give him an attaboy, Ben.
Took me three years with you to earn an attaboy.
Then fuck the attaboy.
Did his job.
Got paid.
Move on.
Your guy.
Your call.
I think I'll give him an attaboy [footsteps approaching.]
Move.
Ooh, a She-E-O.
Nice Uh, Axe I was trying to figure out why you invested in that dogshit robotics company.
And if I fucked an idiot or just someone really duplicitous.
Who told you? Patriot Trust Bank.
Trying to drum up more business.
Definitely not switching primes.
[door opens.]
I heard you were denying Taylor Mason leverage.
- I wanted the Street to know.
- [door closes.]
Now I see what's behind everything: Your wrath.
Which I am now going to blunt.
I'm gonna get Taylor their leverage.
That is not what I would call a proportionate response.
Because proportionate responses don't work on nation states like you.
I-I don't care if you lie or obfuscate.
I care when you take profits that should be mine.
Your cleaning company is worth significantly more than it was yesterday.
You know what kind of horrible shit your competition was up to? Of course I did.
And I would've beaten them, in time, through proper business practices.
And now you have.
And my piece would have been worth even more if I didn't cut you in.
Somehow I don't think it would have gone up so quick if you hadn't.
- Really? - Like I told you: I'm a value add.
Give me back the shares, fucko.
[laughing.]
I paid you handsomely.
You can buy me out at current value.
Take the rest of the ride yourself.
If you want to be rid of me that badly.
Fine.
Half my shares back.
Well, as you said, they're worth more now.
- So what price, uh - I get the profit on those.
You get only your initial investment back on 'em.
And I let you have a clear shot at Taylor Mason.
[inhales sharply.]
Expensive But worth it.
Good.
Done.
And we'll take the rest of this ride together.
By the way, you got bigger.
You now have 4,200 new and hard-working employees ready to step aboard your cleaning company.
Our company.
Now what? You hungry? I could eat.
[knock on door.]
[Chuck.]
Come in.
Donna didn't announce the United States Attorney for the Southern District.
She must've stepped out.
And that's when you stepped in.
Ah.
Always angle-shooting.
Shooting angles.
Important difference.
You taught me that.
- Should I go? - Nah.
I'm just getting warm.
- Ahh.
- I know what you're doing.
And I'm here to tell you, don't.
Don't do it.
Don't run.
You didn't come to plead.
You came to threaten.
So hit me with the back half.
I've been keeping out of your way as much as possible.
What do you call reviewing all my old cases? My duty.
But like I said, I've been holding back the full power of my office.
[Connerty.]
And I think you know what that power is.
[Connerty.]
What it can do.
So if you run, if you try to again put yourself in a position of public trust and public authority, I will be forced to let slip the dogs of war.
Oh, that one I definitely taught you.
Yeah.
That's the one I used on Axelrod to get him to make his first mistake.
Sometimes you learn from the worst.
You didn't need to bring out the needle to nudge me.
I was running.
I am running.
And when I win, I'm gonna roll over you like it's Tiananmen Square.
[bones crack.]
[groans.]
[door opens.]
[Slaid Cleaves' "If I Had A Heart" plays over speakers.]
[indistinct conversations.]
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.
So, how's it work at a quant overlay? Am I still gonna be an analyst or I'm sorry, man.
I can't do it.
The more I read Taylor blocked it.
The dumber I think I am They're like the HAL 9000 or Rain Man.
They're always playing the percentages.
Yeah, they're not.
They see everything.
It's why they did what they did with Axe, despite the risk.
Why they brought me here and put a lot of faith in me and why I gotta say no.
You're blocking me? I think you're a great dude.
If I was 13 again, I would play Magic: The Gathering with you, like, every day at lunch.
But when you're a man, you gotta put childish things away at work.
I got responsibilities now.
Like you said, I'm a partner.
And in these times you remind me Of the man I used to be You're a fucking asshole.
You think you're better than me.
I don't think I'm better than you.
I'm just better at my job.
And I will definitely figure out what an appropriate baby gift is and send one.
Seen the bashing of brains Seen the city unwind Seen the overthrow of dictators and tyrants [dramatic music.]
You ready? You want me to go with you? Or send Cook.
No.
I have to face Grigor alone.
I hope he doesn't recognize that I did it.
What are the chances of that? If he does know, he's either going to take them out or take me out.
[soft music playing on piano.]
Garlic pepper and dill for you.
Horseradish for me.
[vodka pours, glasses clink.]
[glass thuds.]
[Grigor.]
I bring what to most would be bad news.
The Kozlovs, the men who wanted to give you money, have had some reversals and no longer have money to give.
I suppose that is bad news.
For me.
[Taylor.]
But for you these friends are overextended.
Perhaps you could rescue them or and I'm just thinking out loud here take them out.
[Taylor.]
They are vulnerable.
Prone.
You could buy all their assets for pennies on the dollar.
Your idea of fun is to dangle my friends in front of Axe and watch him feed on them? I'm feeding them to you.
Axe just cut 'em down into digestible bites.
This is a course of action only the nastiest of the Bratva would take.
It is also what I thought you might say, and do.
[glasses thud.]
All this raises the question: The Kozlovs, how good friends are they really? It turns out not so good.
I accept this most gracious gift.
And in return, you hope what, that the leverage you so crave will now come directly from me? I think you like that Axe has shut the banks to me.
Because it makes me more reliant on you.
That ends now.
Like the once great American Bob Ritchie said: "You can knock me down and watch me bleed.
But you can't keep no chains on me.
" The Kid Rock.
I admire him greatly.
I need independent leverage.
You'll use your influence to open the banks back up to me.
This I do.
[dramatic music.]
"Only God Knows Why.
" [Italian music playing over speakers.]
[indistinct conversations.]
[bell rings.]
- Oh? - Yeah, yeah.
[bell rings.]
Here.
Can you just give me one second? Yeah.
So glad the fund's coming back to Axe Capital, where it belongs.
Somehow you always seem to get what you want.
Pure luck.
[bell rings.]
[priest.]
from the scourge of spreading disbelief.
[priest.]
Free us from all evils [priest.]
and dangers that threaten us from every side.
[bell rings.]
[priest.]
May the faith for which you sacrifice You sure you're ready for the glare of public life again? You're good at working in the shadows.
Don't worry about me, buddy boy.
[priest.]
the Lord our God can rightfully expect from His servants.
Amen.
[cheers and applause.]
Thank you, Father.
Thank you, Father! I think there's one thing we can all agree upon as New Yorkers.
Someone always wants something from ya.
Someone's always hocking ya.
'Help me.
Support me.
Endorse me.
' Well, maybe you've noticed.
I don't do a lot of endorsing.
Until someone like the next guy comes along.
Then I'm practically hocking him.
I've seen the good he's done to clean up the streets of Gotham.
And I can't wait to see what he's gonna do for the rest of New York State.
I give you your next Attorney General Chuck Rhoades! [cheers and applause.]
- [Chuck.]
Wonderful.
Thank you.
- [Sansome.]
You bet.
- Thank you.
- All right.
Thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am so proud to be here with you tonight.
In fact, "I am chomping at the bit to be your next Attorney General"! - Yes! - [cheers and applause.]
[laughing.]
Okay.
[wolf-whistles.]
[Italian music playing over speakers.]
[cheers and applause continue.]
Yeah! [Gang of Youths' "The Heart Is a Muscle".]
Break me off a piece of that And mix it in with a little wine With someone warm and smart I guess With a heart in first And a soul behind And I Won't give in 'Cause I Wanna try again