Cobra Kai (2018) s04e02 Episode Script

Nice moves, new kid.
What do you call that? The loser limbo? No, no, no, no.
I think it's called the I'm-trying-not-to-shit-my-pants dance.
Good one, LaRusso! Whoa, whoa, what are you doing? Oh, hey, man.
Got in early to knock this sucker out.
Smooth as a Smurf’s ass, right? That deck was the perfect teachable moment.
You just tanked my entire week! The kids know they’re here to learn karate.
You don’t need to trick 'em.
I'm sorry.
What was your lesson plan? Line 'em up and throw forward strikes? I go by feel.
Some days, I'll toss them in a cement mixer.
Other days, I'll find a hornet’s nest for them to kick.
Let’s not do this, okay? Our students want us to find a way to work through our differences.
I know you don’t want to join Miyagi-Do, but at least respect it.
Well, respect's a two-way street.
You respect my style of karate? You gotta understand, man.
I was taught that karate is for defense only.
It’s always gonna be tough to respect Cobra Kai.
- You mean Eagle Fang.
- Oh, come on, Johnny.
Is there a difference? You're still teaching aggression.
Some kids need a little aggression.
You know what? Let's give it a try.
I teach you Miyagi-Do.
You teach me Eagle Fang.
Deal.
No, don't need to shake on it.
Hi, I'm Tory.
We waiting on anybody or is it just you? It's just me.
- Can I start you off with something? - Actually, there's only one thing I need.
That's for you to stay the hell away from my daughter.
- Wait, you're - Yes, I am.
You came to my job? I tried calling your parents.
No call back.
Big surprise.
Should I have kicked in your front door? Is that more your speed? Every day in my house, there are little reminders of the mess you made.
I see my daughter covering up her bruises and scars.
The only reason you aren’t behind bars right now is because she asked me not to drag this ordeal out.
So you can have your little tournament.
But if you touch one hair on her head before then, you'll be scrubbing toilets in prison for the rest of your life.
If you're lucky.
Excuse me, miss? I think my soup is ready.
I see it on the counter.
Yeah, just a minute.
I think you should leave.
I will.
I'm not here to cause a scene.
Just here to deliver a message.
But I need to know that you got that message.
And what if I didn't? Well, then that would be a mistake.
Is everything okay here, ma’am? I don't know.
Is it? Miss? I don't want my soup to get cold.
- Will you shut the hell up? - Tory! That’s it.
Put away your uniform.
I’ve had enough of your attitude.
You’re fired.
Yeah, thanks a lot.
This place got a B on the health inspection.
They hide the sign so you can’t see it.
And I saw one of the cooks dip his balls in the miso.
Uh, you know what? You can cancel my soup.
Yes! Nice! Yes! Okay, let’s switch it up.
New kid, get in there.
We'll get you some gym clothes next week.
LaRusso, Thompson, you're in too.
Let's go! All right.
Sub out! 'Sup, Slade? Ha.
Look who it is.
I'll cover the ballerina.
Come on, LaRusso, you gotta stop that! I’m open! Hey! Break it up! New kid, get the ball! Oh shit! Dude, you just got facialed! Bust out some of that karate! I told you, okay? I-I-I can’t.
Those moves cause, like, permanent brain damage.
Whatever, LaPusso.
Sorry, man, it was an accident.
Bullshit! Hey, come on.
Give the new kid a break, Ant.
We've got a game to finish.
Yeah.
Yeah, all right, Lia.
Just ignore them.
Dope shirt, by the way.
Thanks.
I'm… Kenny.
Remember, side, side.
I could have this finished in two minutes with a paint sprayer.
Then you'll be missing the point of the lesson.
You know, you can’t just layer paint on shit.
You need a heat gun to get down to the base.
Maybe a right angle scraper.
That’s not the point.
If you wanna learn how to fight defensively, you gotta change your instincts.
Well, my instincts say this is a waste of time.
That's quality.
You missed a spot.
Over there.
You know what? Screw this.
What? You quitting already? That's it? Maybe you can do this, but I can’t.
Defense is boring.
Offense will always be more badass.
Fruit in your beer? Figures.
Hi-yah! Holy shit.
How the hell did you do that? Miyagi-Do may seem boring, but don't forget it saved your ass a few weeks ago from Kreese.
And that wasn't the first time.
- Come on, who's the loser now? - You suck! Hi-yah! Nobody was more badass than Mr.
Miyagi.
Remember, side, side.
There’s a reason Miyagi-Do is difficult to learn.
These blocks are incredibly precise.
Each one is designed to overcome a specific attack.
Show me wax on, wax off.
The more you learn Miyagi-Do, the tougher you are to defeat.
Except for one tiny flaw.
Their entire style is reactive, which means all their moves are counter moves.
That means that we are in control.
And we can use that to set traps.
Show me paint the fence.
Sorry.
Just part of the lesson.
Enough! Nichols, in my office.
Continue the lesson.
What is it? Something happen with your mother? No.
It's nothing.
I lost my job, okay? And it's not so easy looking for another one when you're on probation.
Do you feel sorry for yourself? Uh… When something bad happens, you have two choices.
You let it tear you down or you let it build you up.
Sometimes a step backwards… opens a new path forward.
Now, what happened? - Hey, Dad.
- Hey, champ.
 You just get home? -Did I get the time difference right? Yes, sir.
How was your first day? Make any new friends? I'm still getting to know everyone.
It's not easy to switch to a new school mid-year.
But if you do things the right way, you'll see results.
I will.
My boy.
How's Mom doing? She's at the office a lot.
Yeah, she works hard.
She needs you now.
She's had a tough time since… what happened to your brother.
-I know.
You're the man of the house now.
You shouldn't have to be, but you are.
Can you rise to that for me? - Yeah, Dad.
- I love you, champ.
I miss you.
Love you too.
Bye.
Dope shirt, by the way.
One day, over 400 years ago, there was a fisherman.
His name was Shimpo Sensei.
Ambition without knowledge is like a boat on dry land.
That's it.
Big circles.
Right circle.
Left circle.
Walk on the left side of the road, safe.
Walk on the right side of the road, safe.
Walk down the middle… Get squished like grape.
Center yourself, Johnny.
Look inward.
Find your balance.
There you go.
Now show me the moves.
That's it.
Balance good.
-Karate good.
Everything This thing isn't even level.
Or maybe you have a little imbalance inside of you.
I still don't see me using any of this in a real fight.
I’ve been trying to tell you, Miyagi-Do is not about fighting.
You know what Mr.
 Miyagi said was the best defense in all of karate? High outside block against an ax kick? The best defense is "no be there.
" You mean don't be there? The guy teaches you centuries of his ancient family karate, you can’t help him with English? Don’t even go there with me, Johnny.
Are we done, or do I have to sit here and freeze my nuts off to find inner peace? No.
We're done.
You got a taste of Miyagi-Do.
That was the goal.
Good.
Well, get ready.
'Cause tomorrow, you'll learn real man karate.
Oh, I can't wait to hear all about the illustrious history and wise teachings of the Eagle Fang.
Check this out.
Mm.
Wow.
She's cool.
What else do I do for fun? Ooh.
Draw anime.
Listen to music.
Every now and then, some Dungeon Lord cosplay.
Don't tell anyone I told you that.
Send.
Don't worry.
Your secret is safe with me.
Oh my God.
-He cosplays this shit? Ask him who's his favorite character.
Dr.
Scribblebottoms.
Dr.
Scribblebottoms? Oh my God.
That is, like, the lamest character.
He’s like this stupid chipmunk with, with big ears and a lab coat who, like, he mixes, like, health potions and How do you know so much? I just, you know, uh, overheard some, some nerds talking about it.
I got an idea.
Tell him you, I mean Lia, and a bunch of other Dungeon Lord losers are meeting at Balboa Park tomorrow night.
Tell him to cosplay as Mr… Scrapalas or whatever.
Uh, why? Why? What's the plan? Just do it! Man, just do it.
Balboa Park.
Yeah.
Where do you wanna go? He has no clue.
This is gonna be great.
Excuse me.
Do you have any Klare Melk Truffle Gouda? Let me go look.
Oh.
Shit.
Butterfingers, huh? - What are you doing here? - Well, it’s honeycrisp season.
This store has the best produce in the Valley.
Don’t you need to be a legally-mandated distance away from me? Other way around.
Technically, you’re the one in violation.
I know about the deal you struck with my husband and Johnny, and I just want you to know that whatever happens at that tournament, I will make sure you lose.
Is that why you’re sabotaging my student? I wasn’t trying to get Tory fired.
But that girl's asking for trouble.
She broke into my house.
Attacked my daughter.
Sam’s gonna have scars for the rest of her life.
I respect you defending your daughter.
I think that's what all mothers should do.
Unfortunately, Tory doesn't have a mother.
Or one that's healthy enough to defend her.
That girl has to pay the bills.
Put food on the table.
All by herself.
- I didn't know that.
- Well, now you know.
So you might want to leave the girl alone.
Or deal with the consequences.
Mrs.
LaRusso.
Found that Gouda.
Last one too.
Must be your lucky day.
Oh, thank you.
Remember, not all kids are as lucky as yours.
Sweet.
Come on, Johnny, time to wake up.
I'm ready for Eagle Fang training.
That sounded as ridiculous out loud as I thought it would.
You sure you're ready? As I'll ever be.
The hell.
 Wha Where the hell did you take me? An abandoned factory? This is how psychos in horror movies act, you know that? You wanna circle around things your whole life? Wait for problems to show up at your doorstep? That's not what an eagle does.
Here, at Eagle Fang, we do not follow.
We attack.
We lead.
We grow into what we were meant to be.
And what were we meant to be, Johnny? Men.
An eagle embraces the pain! All your life, the world’s been trying to make you less of a man.
Light beer? Veggie burgers? Automatic transmissions? Might as well let another dude bang your chick! You realize the coals are supposed to be shoveled into the forge? Don't question me, Newark! Keep shoveling! Let's go, LaRusso.
Start climbin'.
Toughen up those soft hands.
Push! Can’t wait to get hit.
Gotta strike before the hit gets to you.
- Isn't this a blocking exercise? - No! When you think you should be defending, you should be offending! The human response to danger is fight or flight, but an eagle’s response is fight and flight.
Move it! Be aggressive! Attack! -That's it! Attack! Good, LaRusso! Good! Manliness is next to godliness.
You got this.
Find your limit and soar past it.
- What does this have to do with - Quiet! Keep climbing, LaRusso! You got this! Focus.
Fight! Put your fangs in those balls.
That's it.
- That's it! - Come on! - Let's go, LaRusso! You got this! Yeah! - Yeah! That's what I'm talking about! Soar like an eagle, baby! Yeah, keep going! Yeah! Where is she? Oh my God! Look at him.
Come on, look at him! Look at this loser.
Oh, man.
Oh, I think he's wearing glitter.
Get a close-up of that.
Hey.
- Stop it.
You gotta post that.
No, don't! Don't! - Oh shit! He just broke your phone.
- You gonna let him get away with that? I wasn't trying to break it.
You guys were being assholes.
What did you just call us? Pick him up.
All right, LaRusso.
Let's see your moves.
Yeah! Bust out some of that Miyagi shit.
- I, uh… - Come on, LaPusso! - Don't call me that.
- Then hit him! Come on! Do it! It's locked.
Hey, there's a hole! Go, go, go! Where'd he go? I don't know.
Come on, this way! So what are we doing here? After a hard day of honest work, we're crushing beers, watching guys beat the hell out of each other.
Does this mean I've passed my Eagle Fang training? I didn’t say training was over.
What are you talking about? Look, you're tougher than a prima donna, I'll give you that.
But sometimes you gotta show your toughness.
Look at those guys.
Think they play by the rules? The only rule in this league is intimidation.
That's why striking first is so important.
-Ooh! That guy's a rat.
That's spearing.
At least a double minor.
Hey, Ref! Spearing! Double minor.
Oh, that's bullshit.
Come on! Oh, he looks pissed.
- What the hell, dick? - Hey, he's the one that called it.
Your boyfriend do all your talking? No, I'm just explaining the rules to him.
Oh yeah? Come explain it to me down here! I know what you’re trying to do, all right? I’m not gonna get in a fight with that guy.
He says you're a pussy and he can kick your ass any day.
- Hey, enough! All right? Cut it out! - Oh, come on down, Sally.
Let's go.
I… I didn't say that.
I need to apologize for my friend here.
He's a little… unstable.
We're working through it.
Sorry.
You see what I just did there? That's called de-escalation.
You should try it sometime.
You know what? I actually had fun.
Not even you could ruin hockey for me, Johnny.
Ah, you see? And did they win 'cause they played better defense? No, they won 'cause they beat the crap out of the other team.
I’m not gonna change my stripes, okay? I just now have a little better understanding of what goes on in that head of yours.
So you're saying you respect Eagle Fang? Yes.
The way I respect a madman with a nuke.
I'll take it.
Hey, shithead! Hey, good game, guys.
No hard feelings, right? Because of you, I spent half the game in the box.
Yeah, but you still eked out a win.
It was great.
So you can kick my ass any day of the week.
Is that right? No, I didn't say that.
He Looks like your lover boy bailed on you.
Wait, wait, wait.
You know who this is? It’s LaRusso Auto.
The chopping prices guy from TV? He’s got that smoking hot brunette running the place.
Easy guys.
That's my wife.
Oh.
- Maybe I'll take her for a test drive.
- I'll ride shotgun.
-I got the backseat to myself.
Kick ass! Nice work, LaRusso.
Way to assert your dominance.
Where the hell were you? No be there.
And make sure that Louis doesn't go anywhere near the Doyona reps.
Just lock him in a supply closet or something.
I'll put a cannoli under a giant net.
He'll go for it.
I'm serious.
So am I.
Do I not look serious? - Oh shit.
- Shit? What? What's shit? Why are we saying Shit.
You think this makes up for it? Leaving this at my doorstep? -I don't need your sympathy.
I just wanted to make sure you had enough food.
- Yeah, I feed my family.
- Look, why don't we go talk in my office? We're talking here.
Okay, maybe we just lower our volume? Huh? Gandhi once said that nobody can hurt me without my permission.
Take one more step towards me and I'll snap you in half like a pencil.
Why do I step into these karate situations? Look, Tory, I just want all of this to be over.
Yeah, well, don't worry.
It'll all be over soon.
When I humiliate your daughter at the All Valley in front of everyone.
Thanks for lighting a fire under me.
I needed that.
- What have I done? - Hey.
Should I start wearing protective gear to work? And follow-up, should I be calling the police? No.
And not a word of this to Daniel.
Ever since I started this new school, my life has been miserable.
They chase me.
Beat me up.
Hey.
- Stop it.
It's not gonna stop.
I don't know how I'm gonna keep going.
I don't feel safe.
One of them even knows karate.
Karate, huh? What's so funny? Hey, don't worry about it, little bro.
I know a guy who can help.