Hey Arnold! (1996) s04e02 Episode Script

1
MAN: Here we go.
HELGA: Arnold.
(YOWLING)
(BARKING)
Hey, Arnold!
(OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
(CRASHING)
(SCREAMS)
Hey, Arnold!
Arnold.
Arnold.
(SIREN WAILING)
Arnold.
Arnold.
Move it, football head!
ALL: Hey, Arnold!
Hey, Arnold. Have you seen
your friend Sid around?
No, I haven't.
When you do,
tell him Big Gino needs to
talk to him, immediately.
Psst. Psst.
Sid, what are you doing?
Um, nothing. Just hangin' out.
Why are you in the bush?
No reason, just felt like it.
Is he gone?
Who?
Big Gino's guy.
He's gone, Sid.
What's going on?
Come out of the bush.
No, I'm staying right in here.
I'll tell you what's going on,
but it's gotta be quick.
Gino has eyes
and ears everywhere.
It all seemed
so perfect at first.
(NARRATING) You see,
I've been getting candy
on credit from Big Gino.
We had an arrangement
that I would pay him
at a later date.
After I'd got the candy,
I would sell some
to Chocolate Boy
for half price, and then,
I'll get the money.
Seemed like a great deal.
I had chocolate
and plenty of money.
I was on top of the world.
I got something
I always wanted
and I never felt happier.
All my life I dreamed
of having my own pony,
that I could ride
any time I wanted to.
For one brief shining moment
I was living the good life
and there was no end in sight.
Until
Gino told me I owed him money
for all the candy bars.
Fifty bucks. And I had to
pay him by the next afternoon.
My world collapsed, Arnold.
I didn't know what to do.
I didn't have a plan,
I was afraid to leave my room.
The deadline passed,
and then, the threats began.
And then, yesterday morning,
when I woke up,
it was really weird.
I sat up and saw horse hair
all over my blanket.
(SCREAMS)
(CRYING)
Big Gino put
my pony's head in my bed.
It was terrible, Arnold.
Terrible.
Now I'm in big, big trouble,
and I don't know what to do.
What should I do, Arnold?
What should I do? (CRYING)
Hold on, Sid.
Calm down for a minute.
This is what I think
you should do.
Yes?
You need to come clean.
No. No way.
I'm not doing that.
Sid, you have to
go to Big Gino
and tell him the truth,
or you'll be in
such deep trouble with him
that you'll never
be able to climb out.
But if I went to Big Gino,
he'd kill me. I'd disappear.
No one would
ever hear from me again.
(DOOR SLAMS SHUT)
(YELPS)
Unless maybe you can
go with me, Arnold.
(SIGHS)
(KNOCKS SOFTLY)
Sid, you have to knock
so somebody can hear you.
(KNOCKS HARDER)
Get in.
Sid, you can run
but you can't hide,
my good friend.
I see you've brought
your lawyer.
(STUTTERING) I just
wanted to say sorry
for everything
and then I thought that
I'd come here and, well,
I'll just talk
Stop talking, Sid.
Just stop talking.
I don't want to hear anymore.
This is about business,
you owe us some money.
(KNUCKLES CRACKING)
Gino, you're a reasonable guy,
and you know that Sid's
a good kid who happened to
make a mistake.
And he knows he made
a mistake, right, Sid?
Uh, right.
And Sid wants to repay you
what he owes you.
Right, Sid?
I do.
So maybe you and Sid
can work out a plan,
so that you'll be happy, Gino,
and there'll be
no hard feelings.
Lights.
Arnold, I like the way
you speak.
Very nice.
Very good choice of, uh,
the words you use.
Sure, sure.
We can come to an agreement.
How about if Sid
works his debt off?
You know, help around here
for, like, uh, two weeks.
What kind of work?
No big deal
kind of work. Odd jobs.
Forget about it.
But
But nothing.
Do we have a deal?
Two weeks, and that's
the deal, right?
Sure, sure. Deal.
Hey, let's have a drink.
Yahoos.
GINO: What are we gonna do
about this guy Torvald?
He's not responding
to any one of our threats.
If only we knew something
that would really get him.
I know something
about Torvald.
All right. Spill it.
I know that Torvald likes to
make his mommy happy.
She'd be pretty mad
if she found out he was
doing something really bad.
So, you're saying
that if we told Torvald
that we're gonna
tell his mommy on him,
he'll cry like a little baby
and pay up on the spot?
Probably.
It don't help.
Shut up! I like it.
Sure, sure.
It's good. Very good.
It's very good, I like it too.
I was just about to
say that
You, push the broom.
You, take care of Torvald.
Step on it.
You, Sid, you're smart.
I am?
Sit down, come closer.
Let's me and you
have a little talk.
Sid, what's with the suit?
You like it?
Gino gave it to me.
I thought
you were done with Gino.
I worked off my debt,
and now, things are great.
Gino really likes me,
and thinks I have
a future with his group.
And he promoted me. I'm in.
Sid, I don't think
hanging out with Gino
is the smartest thing to do.
I mean, don't you remember
all those things he did
to you, all those threats?
This is different,
I'll be fine.
What's different about it?
GINO: Yo, Sid.
I gotta go.
You and Arnold
were having a chat.
Everything hunky-dory?
Forget about it.
Good, good.
Okay, my friend,
time to teach you the ropes.
You know, how we do business.
Hey, third graders,
time to buy
your monthly hall passes.
But I don't think
we really need them.
Sure, sure.
You may think you don't,
then, one day, you're gonna be
stopped in the hall
by the wrong teacher,
or by Principal Wartz.
And bingo.
You'll thank your lucky stars
you bought these
hall passes from me.
If I don't buy them,
you'll hit me, won't you?
(WHIMPERING)
(WHISTLING)
SID: Sure, sure,
Chocolate Boy. You can run
but you can't hide.
You owe us some money,
and you will have it all
by after school tomorrow.
Got it?
Hey, what's goin' on?
Sid, what were you doing
to Chocolate Boy in there?
I was just taking care
of some business.
Business? You're starting to
sound just like Gino.
What's happening to you?
Look, stay out of this,
all right, Arnold?
Sid,
you're doing to the other kids
what Gino and his guys
did to you.
You're boring me, Arnold.
Look, Sid.
I know what you may think
but Gino is not your friend.
You shouldn't trust that guy.
Think about it, Sid.
Who's your friend?
You have
all the answers, right?
Listen, Arnold.
Gino and his group
are my friends.
And they let me
in their group like I'm a
Like I'm one
of their brothers.
I'm gonna be a made guy.
Anyway, what do
you know, Arnold?
I gotta get out of here.
He's not your friend, Sid.
Think about it.
Sid, have I been
a good friend to you,
shown you the good life,
brought you into
this thing of ours?
Oh, yeah, you've been
great, just great.
So, Sid, after all
I've done for you,
I was thinking maybe
you could do something for me,
you know, to prove
you're a loyal friend.
Anything, Gino, you name it.
You see, I got this situation
with a kid at school.
So I was thinking
we should give
this kid a swirly.
Great idea, that'll teach him.
I agree. Would you
do this for me? Would you
do me this favor?
Absolutely.
Good. I want you to
give this kid a swirly,
and I want you
to take a picture of it.
Okay.
So, who's the kid?
Sid?
Arnold!
Um, hi, hi, good you're here.
So, how you doin'?
I'm fine. How are you doing?
Funny you should ask
because I have this thing
and I'm in
a crazy situation with Gino.
And he wants me to
Well, I mean, I want to
ask you something.
This is a crazy situation.
What did you want to
ask me, Sid?
Can I give you
a swirly, Arnold?
A swirly?
Please, it's just to
show Gino that him
and I are loyal friends.
Please, Arnold,
just one swirly.
No. Would you let me
give you a swirly?
No. But that's different.
I told you not to trust Gino.
Just one quick swirly.
It's just a little dip.
You're in, you're out.
It's no big deal.
Please! Please!
(TELEPHONE RINGING)
He's still not answering?
Don't do this to me, Sid.
(YELPS)
Sid, where you been?
You know, around.
You've been avoiding me, Sid.
It makes me wonder
about your loyalty.
Do you have
the picture for me?
Ah, the picture
of the swirly.
Oh, no, not yet.
See, I've been real busy
and Arnold's been busy too.
So, we haven't been able to
set up a good time
to get together yet.
I want the picture
of you giving Arnold
a surprise hairwash, Sid.
And I want it
soon. Understand?
SID: Please, Arnold.
We can just fake a picture.
Forget it, Sid.
You got yourself
into this mess,
you can get yourself
out of it.
Oh, no.
I got my hall pass.
Come on, Sid.
It's the moment of truth.
It's swirly time.
What's the big deal?
It's just a little swirly.
It's time you show
your loyalty.
I mean, who's your friend?
Who's your friend?
No! I'm not gonna do this.
You're not my friend,
Arnold is!
I should've seen this before.
How could I have been
so stupid?
If I've to pick between
you and him, then I'm gonna
pick my true friend, Arnold.
So what are you gonna
do about it, Gino?
(FLUSHING)
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)
Let that be a lesson
to you, Sidney.
You passed up
an opportunity of a lifetime.
What a stupid idiotic move.
Here's a picture,
so you won't forget.
Boy, life is funny, isn't it?
One day, you're sucking
on a yahoo and riding on
a rocking horse,
and the next day, some kid
is shoving your head
in the toilet.
Hey, you know,
this is a pretty good
picture of you, Sid.
Let me see that.
Yeah, they caught
my good side.
Well, I better go home
and wash my hair.
Yeah, you do kinda stink.
Well, my head was
in the toilet.
Just stay a few feet
away from me.
Some friend you are.
Well, you stink, Sid.
My head was in the toilet!
(SIGHS IN RELIEF)
The last one, Gerald.
Finally, my hands
are turning all pruny.
Looks like you
forgot a few, losers.
(BOTH GROANING)
Last card, Arnold.
Steady, Gerald.
Don't even breathe.
Luck be a lady tonight.
BOTH: Oh, man.
BOTH: No!
Oops.
Sorry, guys.
(LAUGHS BOISTEROUSLY)
GERALD: (EXCLAIMING EXCITEDLY)
The season finale
of The Z Files.
Arnold, I'm telling you, man,
the suspense is killing me.
Yeah, we've been waiting
all year for this.
BOTH: Hey!
(INDISTINCT ARGUING)
(JAMIE LAUGHING)
Man, Arnold, why can't I have
just a normal older brother?
You know, the kind
who helps you
when you're in a jam,
the kind that can
keep a secret,
the kind that
takes me out for ice cream
for no reason at all.
Instead I get stuck
with Jamie O.
Well, have you ever just
tried to talk to him, Gerald?
You know, tell him
how you feel.
Tell him how I feel?
Arnold, are you wrapped?
This is Jamie O
you're talking about.
The meanest guy on the planet.
The jerk who tortures us
every single day of our lives.
There is no way
he'll ever change.
Not in a million years.
Hey, guys. Have fun
at school today?
Hope you're hungry
for pie. Oh, Gerald,
I did all your chores for you,
and I cleaned your room.
I hope you don't mind.
Oh, gotta go.
I'll catch you fellas later.
Oh, I almost forgot.
I got us all tickets
to the Gladiators on Ice
tournament next weekend.
It should be a blast.
(SHAKILY) Arnold,
is it me or was that
some kind of
spooky Z files moment?
Whatever it was, Gerald,
one thing's for sure,
your brother was
acting really strange.
You're telling me.
What could've possibly
made him act so nice?
ARNOLD: Maybe he made
the wrestling team
or something.
Or maybe the real Jamie O
was abducted by aliens
and they replaced him
with a clone.
What? It could happen.
Come on, Gerald.
I say we follow Jamie
and we'll see what's
really going on.
Are you seeing this, Arnold?
Looks like the brother's
buying flowers.
Flowers? That's kinda weird.
No kidding. Especially since
Jamie O is allergic to them.
(SNEEZES)
See what I mean?
Now that is strange.
Yeah. I thought Jamie O
only ate only protein bars
and raw meat.
Gerald, he's skipping.
The brother is
skipping down the street.
Let's go, man. We have got to
get to the bottom of this.
Now that is just plain creepy.
What, Jamie O
going to a movie?
Arnold, look at
the title of the movie.
"Endless Kiss."
It's a chick flick, Arnold.
Why would he be
going to a chick flick,
and why would he be
going by himself?
Uh, Gerald, I don't think
he's by himself.
Huh?
A girl? Arnold,
are you seeing
what I'm seeing?
It looks like Jamie O's
on some kind of date
or something.
Look closer, my friend.
Bonbons and flowers,
paying for the movie,
giving away
his varsity jacket.
No, sir.
This isn't just a date.
I'd have to say
muscle-head is in love.
In love?
Of course, Arnold.
That's why he's been
acting so goofy.
Oh.
Well, you know
what this means, don't you?
Not exactly.
It means our troubles
are officially over.
I bet as long as Jamie O
has a girlfriend, he's gonna
keep being nice to us.
And we, my friend,
are gonna be livin' large.
ARNOLD: Thanks for
the ride, Jamie O.
Hey, no prob.
Anything for my
favorite little brother
and his main man Arnold.
I gotta go and drop off
Cherice's overdue movies
at the video store.
But, before I do,
here's a couple of fives.
Don't sweat the change.
Arnold, my friend,
this is the life.
Yeah.
(GIRLS LAUGHING)
Hey, Gerald,
isn't that Cherice?
Jamie O's girlfriend?
I am telling you, girl.
This Jamie O guy,
oh, he's unreal.
Flowers, candy, a movie,
all on one date?
Ugh. I swear, it's like
he's in love with me
or something.
How pathetic.
CHERICE: Tell me about it.
I've already got him
running errands for me. (TSKS)
Anyway, I figure
I'll just milk him
for all he's worth.
Milk him for all
he's worth? That doesn't
sound good, Gerald.
Maybe we better tell Jamie O.
(GULPS)
Are you crazy? If Jamie O
finds out, he'll cut
Cherice loose for sure.
Then it'll be
goodbye cherry pies.
Aloha, Gladitors on Ice.
And so long, Mr. Nice guy.
Comprende?
I don't know, Gerald.
I mean, even if he is
a total jerk, Jamie O
is still your brother.
It just seems like
we should do something.
After all he's done?
Come on, Arnold.
This is the guy
who flushed your head
in the toilet.
The guy who stole your clothes
when you were in the shower.
The guy who put your hand
in warm water
while you were sleeping.
As far as I'm concerend,
we don't owe Jamie O a thing.
He deserves whatever he gets.
I guess you're right,
we should probably
just stay out of it.
That's my boy.
Uh, excuse me, Miss,
you think we could get
a couple of
hot fudge sundaes
over here?
Hey, big bro.
Can you wrap it up, and then,
give us a ride to the mall?
Sure thing, little brother.
I hope you guys don't mind
squishing in the front seat.
Ew. Jamie O,
what's that smell?
Yeah, man. What reeks?
Just Cherice's dirty laundry.
I gotta get it done
by five o'clock.
Then drive it over to her,
so she can have something
to wear on our date tonight.
GERALD:
"Mutant Space Freaks 9000."
That is so cool.
Too bad we can't afford it.
Yeah, well, don't be so sure.
Hey, little brother.
Found what you were
looking for?
Yeah, only I'm running
a little low on cash.
You think you can
float me, say 59.95?
No, prob, big guy.
Jamie O's got you covered.
That's funny.
I could've sworn
I had a few 20s in here.
Oh, that's right.
I took Cherice for a pedicure
and a footwax yesterday.
Uh, how about
I just write you a check?
A check?
That'd be just fine.
Hey, Jamie O,
I was wondering if
Yeah, little brother,
what is it?
I was wondering
(TIMER RINGS)
Oh! That's Cherice's souffle.
I had to go to
three different markets
to get the ingredients.
(PAGER BEEPING)
Shoot.
That's the auto shop.
Cherice's car detailing
must be done early.
Man, this is gonna throw me
completely off schedule.
I totally forgot about
Cherice's yogaerobics class.
It starts in 20 minutes.
Man, how am I gonna
pick up her car,
make her dinner,
get her to class,
and finish all this ironing?
(SNIFFS) Uh, Jamie O,
do you smell something?
(YELLING) Cherice's
cashmere sock!
Oh, man, look what I've done.
It's ruined. (CRYING)
How could I have
let this happen?
(DOORBELL RINGS)
I'm such an idiot.
Cherice's totally
gonna kill me.
(CRYING) What am I
gonna do, Gerald?
What am I gonna do?
Hey, Gerald. These shades
your brother got me are great.
Everything's rose-colored.
So what's going on?
Is Jamie O taking us
to the batting cages?
Actually, Arnold,
I haven't really
asked him yet.
I mean, I couldn't.
You couldn't?
It's just that
I've never seen him
like this before. I mean,
the guy's a total wreck.
That Cherice's
really working him over.
I don't know, Arnold.
I'm starting to think,
maybe I should
tell him the truth.
The truth?
I don't get it, Gerald.
You said you don't
owe him anything.
You said he deserves
whatever he gets.
Look, I know what I said
but, I mean,
he's my brother, man.
I gotta do somethin'.
Just look at him.
(CRYING) Cherice.
She told she'll kill me
if I wreck this sock.
You weren't kidding.
The guy's having
a major meltdown.
I guess you're right, Gerald.
You better tell him the truth.
But couldn't you at least wait
until after tomorrow?
You know, until
after Gladiators on Ice?
Sorry, buddy.
(CRYING) Cherice.
It's gotta be now.
Al right, Jamie O,
I think you better get up.
I mean, look at yourself.
It's terrible. I mean,
you're crying over a sock.
Now there's
something important
that I gotta tell you.
So I need you to
quit blubbering
and pay attention.
(SNIFFLING) Okay.
The other day I sorta
overheard Cherice talking.
Cherice?
Yeah, and the thing is
I don't think
she really likes you, Jamie O.
I think she's just using you,
you know, to get stuff.
I'm really sorry, man.
Look, I should've
told you sooner.
Why are you
saying this, Gerald?
'Cause it's
the truth, Jamie O.
No, it isn't.
It's a lie!
You're lying.
Cherice wouldn't
say that, she loves me.
I'm going over there
right now, Gerald.
(SOBBING)
Forgot my souffle.
That went well.
(GIRLS LAUGHING)
Let me get this straight.
He actually took your car
in for detailing?
Yeah. Can you believe it?
The guy's a bigger sap
than I ever could've imagined.
I feel kind of bad
for him actually.
BOTH: (LAUGHING) Not.
CHERICE: Hey, he should
be here by now.
GIRL: Yeah, I hope he made
plenty of souffle,
I'm totally starved.
Well, Gerald,
it was good while it lasted.
Sure was.
(HORN HONKING WILDY)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Okay, Gerald. I'm only gonna
say this once, so, listen up.
It turns out that you're not
the worst little brother
a guy could have. So,
I decided
I'm gonna try to be
a little nicer to you.
You are?
Yeah, but just
from time to time,
you know, when I feel like it.
So, you mean
we still get to go to
Gladiators on Ice tomorrow?
Are you kidding?
I gotta scalp those tickets.
I need the money.
Now, come on,
let's get some ice cream.
Ice cream? For what?
Look, I don't need
a reason, okay?
Now get in the car
before I change my mind.
You too, Arnold.
Well,
it looks like you got
what you wanted
after all, Gerald.
Are you dudes coming or what?
Yeah, I guess I did.
(ENGINE REVVING)
(TIRES SCREECHING)
(MUSIC PLAYING)