Sex Education (2019) s04e02 Episode Script

["What So Never the Dance"
by Bootsy Collins playing]
[vigorous stroking]
Let's dance! ♪
["China in Your Hand" by T'Pau playing]
It was a theme she had
On a scheme he had ♪
- [panting]
- Told in a foreign land ♪
- Is everything okay?
- Yeah. Feels really good.
- Keep doing what you're doing.
- To take life on Earth ♪
To a second birth ♪
- The man was in command ♪
- [stroking slows]
Ah. Sorry.
- What?
- I got hand cramp.
- Oh! [chuckles]
- It was a flight on the wings ♪
Of a young girl's dream ♪
That flew too far away ♪
Don't push too far
Your dreams are china in your hand ♪
Oh shit, I'm
Don't wish too hard ♪
- Because they may come true ♪
- Oh fuck.
And you can't help them ♪
- You don't know what you might have ♪
- I came.
Set upon yourself ♪
China in your hand ♪
- [baby Joy crying]
- [mumbles]
[crying continues]
[sighs]
[mysterious music playing]
- [Joy continues crying]
- [Jean] Otis!
- [Joy wailing]
- [Jean] Oh fuck.
[groans]
[sighs]
She won't stop crying.
Can you do your thing?
Yep. Hang on.
[clattering]
- What's the matter?
- I don't know.
- She's just
- Hey! What's the matter?
Hey, why are you crying?
I can't find anything
that doesn't have sick,
or breast milk.
- Or smell
- Yes, I can do it too.
- Ah! Bwaaaaah!
- [knock at door]
- Oh, for f
- [Joy coos]
Turtle! Oh my
Oh, well, you you look like crap.
Joanna? Why are you here?
Otis called me.
- Oh, my niece!
- Hi.
When did you get so fucking tall? Shit.
- You got her?
- I need to learn to not swear as much.
[gasps]
[whispers] You called my sister?
We need help.
We'll talk about it later.
[Joanna] Wow! Your house is a mess!
Can you grab my bags?
Aren't you gonna shower?
Otis said you're starting a new job today.
- How long are you staying, exactly?
- Well, as long as you need.
Oh! Yes.
- Oh, whee!
- No, she can't really
- Uh, she can't hold her head up yet.
- I know.
I used to nanny for Bono.
I'm great with babies.
- Weren't you sacked?
- That was because of the fire.
- Not the kids.
- Oh.
Anyway, go and have a shower.
- Trust me. You need one.
- Huh.
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Is she doing okay? Uh
- She's not herself.
- Right.
- And, uh who's Joy's dad?
- [door closes]
Don't ask her about it.
She gets very touchy.
- I've gotta go.
- Bye.
- Hello, Joy. Hello.
- [door opens]
[door slams]
[upbeat music playing]
That's too much.
[sighs]
How long do you think it'll take
to get some muscles?
Excuse me?
I'm just thinking about going to the gym.
It's, like it's good for your brain,
exercise, so I'm gonna try it.
That's nice. And what's the real reason?
So Maeve's Maeve made friends
with this guy on her course called Tyrone,
and he's he's ripped.
[brakes screech]
How ripped are we talking?
- Do you wanna see?
- Yes.
- Really?
- Yes.
Oh my God! He is hot!
W And so are you.
In a quiet and soft, intelligent way.
- Okay.
- Yeah. There's no competition.
- Who cares about ripped bodies?
- Really?
- No. Can I see that one more time?
- You're shit.
I'm sorry. I'm lying. He is so hot.
My God, his body is insane!
His biceps have biceps.
[O] Morning.
Hey.
Hey. I said, hey. Wait up!
How are you?
Oh, are you wanting
to book an appointment?
It's me, Ruby Matthews.
We went to primary school together.
I think you have me confused
with someone else. Have a great day.
[sighs]
Baby, can we talk?
Not today, Abbi.
[Aisha] Are you okay?
Yeah. We had a little fight,
but we'll be fine. It'll be fine.
[girl] I think Roman and Abbi
are fighting.
[Ruby] What's that?
Oh, just an ally coming through.
Hey.
Why do you keep blanking me?
Thought we were cool.
I'm just not ready to be your friend.
Yet.
Sorry.
[boy] Whoo-hoo!
[groans]
- Sorry.
- No, no, no.
No, it's fine. I am fine.
[sighs]
Oh, thank you.
I'm Gloria, by the way.
- Michael.
- Nice aftershave, Michael.
- I'm not wearing any.
- Lucky you.
[mysterious music playing]
[sniffs]
- [phone vibrates]
- [emergency brake clicks]
Your father wants to come over
and make dinner for us tonight.
- Why?
- He's trying to make an effort.
[sighs]
- You're not getting back together?
- No. We're not. I promise.
That's fine, I guess.
- Oh, Adam.
- [sheep bleating]
- [sighs]
- Remember not to mumble.
Okay.
Yeah.
Um, what is with the original thing?
I thought O started her clinic first.
There's no way
she came up with this on her own.
She's obviously heard
about my clinic and copied me.
- [Eric laughs]
- What are you doing later?
Shall we hang out? Play Smash?
I'd love to, but my mum is making me go
to this baptism class after college.
I'm kind of dreadin' it.
- [sighs]
- How come?
Just, I'm not out there.
It's like the only place I'm not anymore.
Yeah, it's kind of messed up.
I don't think you should go.
Yeah, it's just it's complicated.
- I feel like my mum is under pressure
- [O] Yeah. Morning, Otis.
[Otis] Good morning.
I saw your website.
It was really cute.
Oh, you've got a new room.
With biscuits.
And what's that? Mint water?
How adorable. See ya.
- Huh.
- [boy] She's really good.
- [O] Hello. Jenny, good to see you.
- [Eric] Hmph.
- [O] Thanks for comin' again.
- Gah! [growls]
[Aimee] Oh God.
[Isaac] Oh.
- It's you again.
- Hi.
[sighs]
God, is this lift broken again?
- You need to press the button.
- Oh.
Lift going up.
Isaac, sometimes I say the first thing
that pops into my head.
And what I said the other day,
it was really, really stupid. I'm sorry.
Maeve thinks we'd really get on,
and I don't have many friends
now she's gone,
so I was hoping
that maybe we could start again.
Okay, let's start again.
[upbeat music playing]
[clucking]
Hello. Yeah. [chuckles]
Okay.
Good boy. Yeah.
- Good boy.
- Why are you waiting out here?
I said to meet in the office.
We were supposed to start ten minutes ago.
- Didn't know whether to go inside or not.
- You coming?
Yeah.
[woman] I'm assuming you ride?
Yep. I, uh I ride bikes.
Horses.
Thought I'd be looking after dogs.
It said on the application
there was kennels.
No. No, you'll mainly be teaching children
how to ride horses.
You do ride?
- Absolutely.
- [horse neighs]
Love horse riding.
And you, uh, drive?
I am a great driver.
I just I don't have a car, though.
- [woman] Get the horse!
- Okay. Can you muck out Midnight for me?
And then you can hose down
the rest of the stables.
Mmm.
[upbeat music playing]
[horse nickers]
Would anyone like some digestives?
- [girl] I'm allergic to sugar.
- [boy] Are they dairy free?
Ruby. Digestive?
I've had an idea that could help you.
And why would you want to help me?
Because, Otis, I want us to be friends.
[laughing]
Oh, I'm sorry.
I couldn't even keep a straight face.
No, this is purely political. Move.
Abbi and Roman are fighting.
Okay, so?
Every school has kingmakers, Otis,
and at this college, it's them.
You fix their relationship,
everyone ditches O
and comes to you instead.
What's in it for you?
Put in a good word for me with Abbi,
so that she'll want to hang out with me.
[sighs] I don't want to play games, Ruby.
I think if I just be myself,
people will eventually realize
I am the better therapist.
[snickers]
Okay. Good luck with that, Otis.
[pensive music playing]
[Beau] Hey.
Hey. Hey, uh I just finished
this great statistics book.
Thought you might like it.
Shall I send it to you?
- Yeah.
- Uh
- Done.
- [chiming]
Got it.
Do you wanna study with me this weekend?
I have to focus.
Oh God. No, no.
Did you did you think I meant,
like, a date or something? Um
I ju
- I didn't, 'cause that would be a leap.
- Right. Yeah.
I honestly did mean for us to just study,
but, um, I completely get that you can't.
So, yeah, hope you enjoy the book.
Thanks.
Jesus. Oh no. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.
[device chimes]
Work that body! ♪
[laughs] Oh!
And reach, two, three, four
Five, six, seven, eight ♪
Stretch, two, three, four
Five, six, seven, eight ♪
Push, two, three, four
Five, six, seven ♪
Every mornin' when we wake ♪
To make up for that piece of cake ♪
- We ate last night ♪
- What do you do? ♪
- We do what's right, all right ♪
- All right ♪
Throw our arms up in the air ♪
You should always get someone
to spot you, dude.
- You could seriously hurt yourself.
- Okay, thanks.
- Okay, let's go.
- Do this. [chuckles]
- [Jackson] Never seen you in here before.
- [puffs] I'm just trying to stay fit.
Has anyone ever put their finger
up your bum before?
Oh shit. Sorry. Sorry.
Thought you were
still doing that therapy thing.
I don't know why I'm talking to you.
I don't like you.
- I'm having casual sex with this girl.
- Mmm?
And last time we did it,
dude, she put her finger
up my bum.
- Okay.
- I'm talking, like like way up there.
With no warnin'.
Like a ninja.
And now I'm feeling totally freaked out.
Did this act feel bad for you?
No, it felt great.
I mean, it was a shock.
But I came.
[chuckles]
Really fast.
And now I'm feeling very confused.
Because I really didn't think I was queer.
But maybe, if I like this kind of thing,
then I'm
queerer than I thought.
Well, sexuality can be very fluid.
And it's normal to have questions.
Plus, there's a lot of heterosexual men
who also like
having their prostate stimulated.
- [boy] You boys using this bench?
- No.
You all right? You seem disappointed?
I really like this person
who it didn't work out with.
And I thought,
maybe if I was, like, a little bit queer,
then I could get them back.
- We had a real connection.
- You don't feel that with this new person?
I mean, she's nice,
but there's not much conversation.
Even though you enjoyed yourself,
those things should
never come as a surprise.
I would encourage you guys
to practice enthusiastic consent,
which is looking
for the presence of a happy yes,
rather than the absence of an unhappy no.
You might find better communication
leads to a more intimate connection.
But being hung up on someone
you still have feelings for is hard.
What is it you think
you miss the most about them?
So my brain is often anxious.
It's been like that since I can remember.
But when we were together, they kind of
made things go quiet for a second.
But I have this habit of
falling for people that can't commit, so
Mmm.
- Talking about Maeve?
- Yes.
It always felt like
she was lookin' for something better.
It's a shame about the whole college
seeing your weird pubes thing.
- 'Cause you're good at this.
- Thanks, man.
[jaunty music playing]
Though the lead character was so unsavory,
I didn't wanna leave him.
- I was haunted by his journey.
- [Mr. Molloy] I agree.
The way you write about feeling isolated
within your own community, it's, uh
it's fascinating.
Brutal but eye-opening.
It's a little overwritten, but it's
a promising start. Thank you, Tyrone.
Who's next? Maeve?
Talk to me about what you were aiming for
with this first chapter.
So I was aiming to explore Maria Brontë's
isolation through her illness.
- Um, she's the protagonist, so
- Yeah, I
[sighs] I was bored.
- Oh.
- I do not think this has a pulse.
Okay.
What does everyone else think?
You can be honest.
We're here to help each other.
I liked that it was written
from Maria's perspective.
I saw the world through her eyes.
I didn't know anything
about the oldest Brontë sister.
Well, that's what Wikipedia's for.
There are lots of historical novels.
It's uh
Okay, not trying to be mean here.
I'm just trying to push you.
You're clearly very well-read,
but this, it it feels like imitation.
I wanna know who you are.
I wanna hear your voice.
Okay? All right.
We will continue this next class.
[bright music playing]
- We heard you and Roman are fighting.
- We're sending positive thoughts.
Um, thank you.
If people focused on their own problems
instead of other people's,
the world would be a better place.
I'm gonna get a drink.
This is huge.
Abbi and Roman never fight.
- I want to know what happened so badly.
- What
So, what? She hasn't told you?
She says it's betraying Roman.
- Which I think is ridiculous.
- Sh, she's coming.
- Please don't tell Abbi I gossiped.
- No, no, no.
- I really hope you can work this out.
- Thanks. I do too.
I booked us in with O,
so hopefully, it'll be fine.
- Can I still crash at yours tonight?
- [Aisha] Sure, any time.
You should come over
to Aisha's later and hang out.
Oh, I'd love to, but I, um
I've got, like, a family thing.
[chuckles]
- That's cool, next time.
- Yeah.
[jaunty music playing]
[Abbi] I don't want to go there just yet.
But did you guys just hear a fart?
- [Eric] No! [chuckles]
- [Abbi] Did someone fart?
- Wasn't me!
- No!
You don't need to. You don't need to.
Hello, hello, hello.
- Hey! Hello, hello. Hi.
- Um
- I was wondering if you'd do me a favor.
- Mmm?
- So, you know Roman and Abbi are fighting?
- Yes.
I was wondering if you could
put in a good word for me and my clinic?
Ooh. I don't really know if I wanna
play around in their relationship.
- Okay.
- Know what I mean?
Yeah. No, that's fine. I get it. I was
- It was probably a silly idea. Sorry.
- No, no. No, I'm sorry.
- Uh
- It's fine.
- Mmm.
- It's fine, honestly.
Um I've gotta go.
I'm gonna be late for church.
- But I will see you tomorrow. Yeah.
- See you tomorrow, yeah.
- See you later.
- See you later.
[jazzy theme tune playing]
[man] Okay, we're good to go.
Five, four, three, two, one.
- You've got this, Jean.
- [dings]
Hello!
[typing]
- I'm Dr. Jean Milburn.
- Talk.
And I'm your host of this edition of
Sexology with Dr. Jean Milburn,
which is me, your host.
Oh, I've just said that.
So, call in and tell me your problems.
Your sex and relationship problems.
What's the number, Jean?
Call in. This is the number.
Got it.
Uh
[somber music playing]
Fuck.
Talk!
- [church bell tolling]
- Tell heaven ♪
Now you tell heaven ♪
- I am comin' ♪
- In Acts 2:38
- I'm comin' on home ♪
- Peter said, "Repent and be baptized,
every one of you,
- in the name of Jesus Christ"
- Oh, one day ♪
- "for the forgiveness of your sins."
- Just tell my heaven ♪
- Baptism offers a chance to be born again.
- My heavenly king ♪
It is a new beginning.
- We can wipe the slate clean.
- Just tell him ♪
- That I'm comin' ♪
- Turn our backs on our old simple ways.
- Dedicate our lives to serving Jesus.
- On the mornin' train ♪
- All mistakes in the past are forgiven.
- Tell heaven ♪
- Hey.
- Hey.
Hey
Your mother mentioned you were havin'
some doubts about gettin' baptized?
Oh, she did? Excellent. Thanks, Mum.
Sometimes it helps
to talk these things through.
- I just don't feel fully accepted here.
- In what sense?
You're a really important member
of our community, Eric.
I have to hide parts of myself
that others might not be comfortable with.
I see.
But your relationship with God
is personal.
Other people don't need to know. Do they?
But it's who I am.
Baptism is between you and God.
So don't let anything hold you back.
Okay?
- One day ♪
- Tell heaven ♪
I'm comin' on home ♪
One day ♪
Eric?
Hey!
Oh my God! I'm just on my way to Aisha's.
- You have to try this. It's so good.
- What is it?
It's like a hemp strawberry milkshake.
[slurping]
- Mmm!
- Get into it!
Oh my God! That is so good!
- How was your family thing?
- Uh [laughs]
Do you know what? I actually
was at this baptism class at my church.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
People can be a bit funny
about the whole God thing, so
I lied. [laughs]
- Wanna walk with me for a bit?
- Yeah.
[birdsong]
I'm Christian, too, by the way.
- You are not? [laughs]
- Yes.
Oh my gosh, Abbi!
Yeah, I had to leave my old church
when I started my transition,
but it was tough.
But I still believe in God.
I'm trying to get Roman to come with me
to a more accepting church,
but he's so anti-religious.
- Oh.
- So I get the whole, um, judgment thing.
- Trust me.
- Yes.
Is your church more open or
Uh, no.
So I'm finding it tough too.
You can talk to me about it
if you ever need.
- Yeah.
- Yeah. Come here.
Aww. Thank you, Abbi.
[gentle music playing]
[Michael] Aah.
Here we go.
Ooh.
Looks lovely, Michael.
Adam started his apprenticeship today
at the farm.
Um, I actually need to learn how to drive.
I I didn't realize when I applied.
Oh, okay. We can get you some lessons.
- What are the career prospects
- Thank you.
after this apprenticeship?
Um I'm learning to teach kids
how to ride horses.
Oh. So, you want
to be a riding instructor?
Or you want to run a farm?
[Maureen] Thank you.
I just like animals.
[chuckles] Well, you can't make a career
just because you like something.
You're gonna have to earn money
in the real world.
Maybe something like bricklaying
would be a better option.
- [sighs] Would you like some kale?
- I'm actually not hungry.
[sighs]
What did I do?
He clearly hasn't thought about it.
I don't want it to be another thing
he doesn't see through.
[somber music playing]
Kale?
No, I don't want any kale.
Maybe he doesn't see anything through
because he's so afraid of
disappointing you that he doesn't try.
Oh. [sighs]
[knocking at door]
[Madam whimpers]
[Michael] Adam, I'm heading off now.
Yeah.
[door opens]
[Madam growls]
If you'd like, I could, um
give you a driving lesson at the weekend.
I'm, um sorry.
I was too harsh downstairs.
I just want you
to think about your future. That's all.
- Okay.
- Hmm?
I'll, um
I'll think about the driving lesson.
[clears throat]
[keys jangling]
[sighs]
Why is the furniture all changed around?
Uh, Joanna did it. She's unpacking.
We heard your radio show.
- It was
- Disastrous.
[sighs] I was distracted,
because my sister,
who was looking after my newborn,
wasn't answering the phone.
- Hmm.
- [Joy gurgles]
I can't believe
that you asked her here, Otis.
- What were you thinking?
- I was thinking you needed some help.
Well, I don't. I'm fine. It's
- No, you're not fine, Mum.
- [sighs]
Jakob and Ola are gone, you have a baby,
and I'm in my last year of sixth form.
A lot's changed. You need some support.
- I wish you hadn't asked her.
- Well, I did.
And she's here now,
so please just let her help you.
[walking upstairs]
["Do the Evolution" by Pearl Jam playing]
Whoo ♪
I'm ahead ♪
I'm a man ♪
I'm the first mammal
To wear pants, yeah ♪
[through earphones]
I'm at peace with my lust ♪
I can kill, 'cause in God I trust ♪
- Yeah ♪
- [deleting]
It's evolution, baby ♪
[phone vibrating]
- Hey.
- [Otis] How you doin'?
Not great. Mr. Molloy hated my chapter.
Okay, well, I'm sure he's wrong.
Well, he's probably right.
Tyrone liked it, but I need to write
something more personal. How was your day?
- Tyrone seems to be around a lot.
- Yeah. He's my friend.
What are you trying to say?
Just that you
you speak about him a lot, and
- He's there a lot.
- Did you call to check up on Tyrone?
No, I'm
- I don't have a good feeling about him.
- You don't know him.
I know you keep dropping him
into conversation.
- And he's putting photos of you online.
- You've been stalking him online?
I casually checked, Maeve.
Otis. He's gay.
He has a boyfriend back home in Illinois.
Okay.
That clears that up, then. I'm glad.
Okay. I feel really bad now.
- Can we pretend I didn't say anything?
- No. You've pissed me off.
- I've got to get back to work. Bye.
- Maeve
[beeping]
[sighs]
["Hold On I'm Coming"
by The Voltage playing]
Don't you ever be sad ♪
I was wondering
if we could, like, ask each other stuff.
- Like dirty talk?
- [chuckles]
Or more like, um
Like, can I take your top off?
- Yeah?
- Hold on ♪
I'm comin' ♪
- Can I touch you here?
- Hold on ♪
I'm comin' ♪
I'm on my way ♪
Your lover ♪
- Can I touch your dick?
- If you get cold, yeah ♪
- Yeah.
- I'll be your cover ♪
Don't have to worry 'cause I'm here ♪
Can I put my finger up your bum?
- Absolutely.
- [laughs]
Hold on ♪
I'm comin' ♪
Hold on ♪
I'm comin' ♪
Hold on ♪
I'm comin' ♪
Hold on, I ♪
[laughing]
Hey, do you wanna stay?
We could get to know each other a bit.
I meant it when I said
I want this to be casual.
Yeah.
I'm not doing relationships right now.
It's probably nothing,
but I felt something in your ball.
I think you might have a lump.
You might wanna get it checked out.
Huh?
[tense music playing]
[clears throat]
[door opens]
[door closes]
- [front door opens]
- What the fuck?
[front door closes]
[Eric] So, wait, Tyrone is gay?
I should have known.
And then you accused Maeve of cheatin'?
[laughs]
Shut up.
- It's not funny.
- That is so fun No.
No, you're quite right.
It's not funny at all.
Except it's very funny!
Would you like to light a candle
for Abbi and Roman?
Oh gosh.
[girl] They have to stay together.
They have an appointment with O
later today to talk things through.
- O.
- [girl] We're sending positive thoughts.
[clears throat]
- Do you need a spot?
- Thanks, yeah. That'd be great.
- Of course.
- [sighs] I'm tense today.
[grunts]
What's goin' on for you?
I don't know if you saw my speech. I'm a
I'm a therapist. Maybe I can help.
Oh yeah. You're Patchy Pubes Guy.
Uh, yeah.
I had a fight with me girlfriend.
It's bad. I feel so betrayed.
What happened?
[jaunty music playing]
[Roman] It was two nights ago.
I asked Abbi if she wanted to have sex.
She said she wasn't in the mood,
so we had a kiss good night,
had a cuddle,
and I thought we both went to sleep.
But then
[bedsprings squeaking]
I woke up to this strange sound and
- Abbi, are you wankin'?
- [panting]
[gasps]
It's interesting to me
you use the word "betrayed."
- Can you tell me more?
- It feels like she was cheatin'.
Well, engaging in self-pleasure
in a committed relationship
can be beneficial to a healthy sex life.
We don't really have sex anymore.
And how long's that been the case?
Since she moved in with me and me family.
I feel like she's not
attracted to me anymore.
Has she told you that?
Well, no, but Abbi doesn't like
to talk about negative things.
So even if she wasn't
attracted to me anymore,
I feel like she wouldn't tell me.
She says she has a low sex drive,
but then she's secretly wankin'.
Sex drives are a complicated thing,
and lots of things can affect it.
There is stress or tiredness,
over-familiarity, expectation.
It's been a tough time.
Abbi's family kicked her out,
and she pretends she's okay, but
sometimes I don't think she is.
Hmm.
Sometimes couples need
to take the pressure off
and just go back to the basics.
Hugging, kissing,
just spending time with each other
without the underlying pressures of sex.
I do love huggin' Abbi.
I mean, it seems to me that
you don't really want to break up at all.
Do you think Abbi might be interested
in having a session with you and me?
["I Believe in Miracles"
by Jackson Sisters playing]
Thank you.
[students gasping]
- I believe in miracles, baby ♪
- [cheering]
I believe in you ♪
They say the day is ending ♪
Let's watch the sun go down ♪
- And plan a holiday ♪
- How can I help?
He always wants to high-five me
when I come.
Babe, don't!
- I think I have nits.
- You should go see the nurse.
They're on my dick.
I like lickin' armpits.
Is that normal?
I pulled out and was devastated
to see the condom was missing.
Where could it be?
Ooh.
I queefed during sex one time,
and now my boyfriend
calls me Queen Laqueefa.
When you failed to say ♪
I believe in miracles ♪
- Don't you? ♪
- I believe in miracles ♪
- Don't you? ♪
- I believe in miracles ♪
- Nice to see you again.
- Don't you? ♪
- Oh ♪
- Don't you? I believe in miracles ♪
- Oh, oh ♪
- Don't you? I believe in miracles ♪
- Oh ♪
- Don't you? I believe in miracles ♪
Don't you? ♪
- Oh ♪
- Don't you? I believe in miracles ♪
- Oh ♪
- Don't you? ♪
[Gloria] That is interesting.
Have you thought about shadows?
Oh, it doesn't look right.
- What's it meant to look like?
- Supposed to be my melon.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
I had this friend called Melon
when I was a kid.
- [Gloria] Great work. Ooh!
- Took him everywhere with me.
But it doesn't look anything like him,
so the picture doesn't mean anything.
- [Gloria] Oh, great.
- Don't think I understand this art stuff.
[Gloria] Try around the corners,
the edges.
Sorry, why did you
call your childhood teddy bear Melon?
No, no, he wasn't a teddy bear.
He was an actual melon.
Yeah, I loved him so much,
but he went all moldy and shrunk,
and he smelled so bad.
It was my first experience of death.
Aimee, that's really weird.
- Is it?
- Yeah.
Lovely, but just quite weird.
- [Gloria] Nice and light.
- [chuckles]
- Do you like drawing?
- [Gloria] Be bold.
Uh, it hurts my wrist,
having to hold a pencil for so long.
Then you don't have to draw.
There's loads of ways to make art.
I can show you this weekend if you like.
- [Gloria] That's interesting.
- Yeah.
- Thank you.
- Cool.
[Gloria] Her knees are a triumph.
[yells] Great job. The color's very vivid.
See that thing on her jacket?
It's a microphone.
- And yet, she still shouts.
- [chuckles]
- [sighs]
- [Gloria] Very good instincts.
Hi. I'm Cal, by the way.
Aisha, nice to meet you.
[Joy crying]
Oh, stop whining.
- [groans]
- [calm music playing]
I don't know what you want.
Afternoon.
Where's the coffee?
Why are you here, Jo?
To help you. I told you.
And, um I broke up with Patrick,
so I'm sort of in between places.
- When?
- A few months ago.
He was lovely, but it started to feel like
I was having sex with my brother.
He started pissing
with the door open all the time.
I got back from Malaysia and haven't
had a chance to find anywhere to live yet.
And you need my help,
and I need somewhere to stay,
so it was meant to be.
Well, if you're going to be here, Jo,
then properly be here.
Okay.
- I'm here.
- Then, here.
- I will make the coffee.
- Okay.
[Joy continues crying]
[Otis humming cheerfully]
[knock at door]
Come in.
Otis.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- I wanted to talk about something else.
- Of course.
Um, so I took your advice,
and it was great.
Cool.
But then the girl
who I was telling you about,
she told me about a lump that I've got.
On my ball.
- Which is normal for some guys, right?
- Um, some people, it's perfectly normal.
But if it's a new lump,
or you're just worried about it,
you should go and see a doctor.
- Okay, thanks.
- All good.
Oh, also, that thing I said
about Maeve yesterday.
Chattin' shit.
I genuinely think she likes you.
I'm just feelin' lonely or something
at the moment, so [chuckles]
You all right?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
Cool, thank you.
Thanks.
[O] Hello.
Can I help you?
- That's cute.
- Mmm.
I have been thinking about our clinics,
and maybe we should team up.
- Really?
- You're obviously not awful at this.
And I could use an assistant.
Okay, well, I don't need to assist anyone.
You know, I'm running my own clinic here.
I don't know if you've noticed?
- But it's doing pretty good.
- You said it yourself.
Having two clinics on campus
isn't really gonna work,
and I'm not goin' anywhere.
- So I'm just tryin' to find a solution.
- Hmm.
I mean, this is a student-led campus.
- Mmm.
- Why don't we let them decide?
- What, like an election?
- Yeah.
[chuckles] Are you are you bein' serious?
Very serious.
[suspenseful music playing]
Okay.
- Okay.
- Yeah, okay.
Well, I will run it by Principal Lakhani.
May the best sex therapist win.
That would be me, by the way.
[door closes]
Good work in here.
Saddle up Midnight for me,
and you're done for the day.
[Midnight snorting]
[Adam clears throat]
[Midnight grumbles]
Are you afraid of horses?
No.
No, no, no. No, of course not.
Their, uh
their faces are a completely normal size.
Okay, there we are.
Okay.
- It's on backwards.
- Right, okay.
Maybe I don't know anything about horses.
Maybe I'm a little bit scared of them.
Please don't fire me.
I'm really good with dogs,
and, um, I'm a quick learner.
They're just big dogs, right?
- I really want this apprenticeship.
- For fuck's sake.
You do drive, though?
- [Aisha] No, you didn't!
- [Abbi] I had a good time/
- [Roman] Oh my God.
- [Abbi] The lion looked line
[Viv] You seeing Anabelle tonight?
Nah.
I don't think I wanna do the casual thing.
And I still like Cal, so
You all right?
How's that?
He asked me to study with him
at the weekend.
Oh! So, you said yes?
- No.
- What?
- I can't get distracted.
- Viv!
- You like him, yeah?
- Yeah.
And he clearly likes you back,
which doesn't happen often.
Just go talk to him.
- Now.
- [sighs]
[Jackson chuckles]
[mysterious music playing]
[Beau] Hey, Viv.
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. You.
Um, I thought I told you
that I didn't want you messin' around
in Abbi and Roman's relationship.
I found a way to help them
without getting you involved.
I thought that'd be okay.
Yeah. Yeah, no, it is, I guess.
[device chimes]
Oooooooh!
Tings are gettin' a little bit serious!
- Hmm!
- Hey, Eric. Comin' to that vegan place?
Oh, yes. Yeah, yeah. Two seconds.
- See you later.
- Bye.
Ah, thanks again, Otis.
I'll maybe see you at the gym?
Uh
No, I've Gym's not for me. I think. Bye.
- You'll love the falafel.
- Bye!
[laughs]
- [Roman] Yes! Oh my God.
- [Eric] Oh my gosh! I can't wait!
- [Abbi] Yeah, I
- [Eric] No! Really?
How on Earth
did he become friends with them?
- I don't know.
- So you took my advice.
Okay, an opportunity presented itself.
Stop talking.
Did you put in a good word for me?
Okay, it's fine. Don't worry.
I don't need your help anyway,
but you definitely need mine.
- You have no idea what you're in for.
- What are you talkin' about?
Well, I know how things like this work.
And I could be your campaign manager, hmm?
[scoffs]
Well, I'm with Maeve now,
so I don't know
if that's really a good idea.
Oh, I am not trying
to get back with you, Otis.
You're very arrogant sometimes.
[bright music playing]
- I know it's probably too on the nose.
- Maeve.
It's fuckin' brilliant.
And it pains me to say it
because I want that internship.
[laughs]
Seriously, I feel like I've been
to where you grew up now.
Like I know all these eccentric characters
in this place,
but it's not sentimental at all.
Like, there's no anger in it about
your mom or your dad not being there.
- How did you write this in a day?
- It's what I know.
You should give it to Molloy.
He's gonna be all over it.
[Bach's "Violin Concerto No. 1
in A minor" playing]
[knocking at door]
Come in.
Oh, sorry.
No, it's okay. Come in.
Come in. Come in!
- Is everything all right?
- Yeah. Yeah.
I, uh just got a rejection
from the New Yorker.
You'd think at this point, I wouldn't care
what people think, but, uh
Fuck those assholes.
Yeah. I mean, I'm sure it's their loss.
Yeah, apparently,
everyone's writing about gay shit now, so
[sighs]
Okay. I I can come back later.
Maybe I could read it to you.
"not far from
that bright burning furnace."
"Slow."
"Slow, slow."
"New shoots begin to root."
It's great.
- [clears throat]
- It's brilliant.
Yeah, I [sighs]
I don't need you sucking up.
It's what I liked about you
when you told me you'd read Night Tales.
Nobody ever wants to talk about
my other work.
They just want me
to keep rehashing Rainbow Maze.
And a writer has to be allowed
to evolve, Maeve.
So please, tell me what you think.
[sighs]
The beginning really drew me in.
- Mmm.
- Um
But the middle part lost me emotionally.
You could make a few cuts. [chuckles]
What I love about Night Tales,
for example, is that you you
you just said it like it is.
You didn't give a shit
about making the perfect sentence.
You you weren't so self-conscious
when you were starting out.
It was all heart.
- All heart.
- Mmm.
[clears throat]
It's an interesting observation.
Do you want me to read that?
Oh yeah. Um Sorry.
This is, um
It's an idea I had for a new book.
There's more of me in it, I think.
What is Southchester?
The name of the caravan park I grew up in.
Great. I'll take a look.
Yeah. Okay. Great, thanks.
[phone rings]
I'm sorry.
I got carried away. And in my head,
you were having an affair or something.
- It was stupid.
- It's okay.
Distance is hard.
Just talk to me next time, okay?
I have something to tell you.
You know my teacher, Mr. Molloy?
He's looking for an intern.
I think I've got a chance of getting it.
And staying in America?
Yeah, I guess so, if I got the position.
Right, right. Well, that's a big deal.
- Why are you being weird?
- You said you were coming back.
Well, I might have changed my mind.
Okay, I've gotta go.
What? For someone who's supposed
to be emotionally intelligent,
you can be such an immature
arsehole sometimes.
Yeah. Yeah. I'm the arsehole here.
If we can't call without fighting
or one of us hanging up,
we should take some space.
Yeah. You know what? Good idea.
Seriously? Fine.
[sighs]
[tablet chimes]
[O] All right, Cavendish. What's up?
It's O here.
Listen up
It's not long till you gotta decide ♪
You need a counselor ♪
It's election time ♪
- There's no shame, there's no blame ♪
- Fuck.
All you've gotta do is
Tick the box beside my name ♪
I'll offer you free, discreet advice ♪
Diggin' deep in your mind ♪
- Helpin' work out ♪
- Fuck's sake.
Why is your ex
Still controllin' your life? ♪
And why is your sex life ♪
- Still somewhat dry? ♪
- Come on!
A friendly face
That can offer a safe space ♪
A nice place
And together, we'll investigate ♪
There's nothin' taboo
Between me and you ♪
So come and see me
For a sexual breakthrough ♪
So vote O for Cavendish ♪
- Vote O ♪
- Your own sexual therapist ♪
We'll talk about what worries you
And we'll work it through ♪
You're not alone, I'm here for you ♪
["I Wanna Be Your Dog"
by The Stooges playing]
[line ringing]
[Ruby] Hello, Otis.
Does your offer to help me still stand?
So messed up, I want you here ♪
In my room, I want you here ♪
Now we're gonna be face to face ♪
And I'll lay right down
In my favorite place ♪
And now I wanna be your dog ♪
And now I wanna
Be your dog ♪
And now I wanna be your dog ♪
Well, come on ♪