iCarly s04e03 Episode Script

Uhhh.
Uhhhhh.
Uh, string? No.
Uh, cotton candy? No, no, no.
You wish.
Four seconds on the clock.
Oh, man.
Aah, come on.
Sorry, Gibbles, you were standing in Random hair.
From the floor of Manny's barbershop.
Manny's.
Snippin' and scizzin' for over 20 years, hey.
Bald people not welcome.
Hey.
So what do I do now? It's time for you To get outta here.
Wooo.
Wooo.
Get out.
And take the hair.
Nice shorts.
Later, Gib.
Wooo.
Alrighty.
This week at iCarly.
com One of our fans sent us an awesome prank video.
Show 'em the prank, Fred-weiner.
Sure thing, Sam jerk.
And that's why you're behind the camera.
Prank playback.
Hey, iCarly.
Okay, we just pulled an insane prank on my dad.
We took a pickle, filled it with fake blood.
Check out what happened.
What the oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Okay, that was hilarious.
When isn't a bleeding pickle hilarious? When the pickle's children are watching.
Poor little pickles.
We're so sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
No.
In 5, 4, 3, 2 I know you see somehow the world will change for me and be so wonderful live life, breathe air I know somehow we're gonna get there and feel so wonderful it's all for real I'm telling you just how I feel so wake up the members of my nation it's your time to be there's no chance unless you take one and the time to see the brighter side of every situation some things are meant to be so give me your best I wonder what this person's story was.
Gibby.
Hey, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby, Gibby.
Yeah? Your daddy is here to pick you up.
Oh, boy.
I'm on my way.
Bye, Gib.
Later, Gibby.
Hey, can I keep this bucket of hair? Yes, you can.
Yeah.
Daddy, guess what I got.
Hey, Sam, did you ever give me back my she's asleep.
I thought she seemed less irritating.
Yo, Puckett.
Hey.
Oh.
I didn't even throw it.
What you doin'? Just sending a thank-you text to that guy that sent us the prank video.
Oh, yeah, I loved that bloody pickle bit.
Yes, bleeding snacks are always hilarious.
You wanna know the best prank I ever pulled? Oh, no.
I made a cop think his feet got cut off.
Ew.
So funny.
Oh, I'd love to hear the funniest prank you ever pulled.
Uh, I've pulled some great pranks.
Like once when I was at boys' camp, I filled this kid's hat with raisins.
And I'll tell you what, he wasn't expecting that in his hat.
What about you? What about me? Best prank you ever pulled.
Oh.
Do knock-knock jokes count? Knock-knock jokes? They don't even count as jokes.
Then I guess I've never done one.
Come on.
You've never pulled one prank in your whole life? Well, what about the stuff we do to Lewbert on iCarly? Those are pranks.
Yeah, that I come up with.
Doesn't count.
Then sorry.
I'm guess I'm not the pranky type.
Come on, dude, you're like way too old to have never pulled one prank.
Well, I'm sure it'll happen when I, you know, meet the right person.
No, no, no, no, no.
This needs to happen soon.
It does not.
Freddie? I'm with Sam on this one.
Okay.
I'll prank someone.
Score one for peer pressure.
Good to see you, Paul.
S'up.
Vanessa, new scarf, right? Yep.
Here we go.
Pranking Gibby doesn't count.
You gotta prank a real person.
Gibby's a real person, and this is a good prank.
You'll see.
He's opening his locker.
Look at his face, look at his face.
A fish? Hey, dad, fire up the grill.
I'm bringing home a trout.
A fish? My fish.
my fish.
Well, I kinda got him.
You got him dinner.
Okay, that was good revenge too.
And by the way, you didn't kill Herve.
The camera flash just stunned him.
How come that little girl's so good at pranks? Hey, kid.
Hey.
Look, I made a spoon hat.
Well, that explains why I'm having to eat my soup with a fork.
Uh, here.
Thanks.
What's wrong, kid? You been bumming around ever since you got home from school.
Don't worry about it.
Come on, talk to me.
No, it's stupid.
Nothing's stupid to a guy in a spoon hat.
All right.
Sam and Freddie have been making fun of me 'cause I've never pranked anyone.
I have to go now.
Wait.
Spencer, why are you acting so weird all of a sudden? I don't wanna talk about it.
Okay? Can you please just respect that? No.
Sit.
Come on.
When I was in the ninth grade, I used to pull pranks all the time.
Really? Mm-hmm.
Other kids called me the king, you know, of pranks.
Prestigious.
Right? But I got carried away with it.
At first, I was pranking, like, one or two people on the weekends.
Pretty soon, I was doing it every day.
I couldn't control myself.
And one day I had a special prank planned that day.
It was a perfect autumn Tuesday.
One two, buckle my shoe three four, shut the door My head peered around a corner.
And then I said, "it's time for garlic powder.
" So I grabbed my rope, and I yanked it.
Over 200 pounds of garlic powder came raining down.
At first I was so proud But then oh my God! Oh my God! It burns! Whoa, whoa, what's wrong? It's not supposed to hurt you.
It's just garlic powder.
It's supposed to be funny.
It was just a prank.
Why garlic powder? I just thought it would make their heads smell funny.
I didn't know garlic powder stang if it gets in your eyes.
You mean stung.
What? Well, I think the past tense of sting is stung, not stang.
What? You're missing the point.
My prank hurt people, innocent school-goers.
They had to go to the emergency room and get their eyeballs flushed.
I vowed then that I would never ever pull another prank.
And did you? Never.
Well, then you can control yourself.
Well anyway, I just want you to help me pull a prank.
Just one.
Yeah, but please? Uh please? You know, I can't say no to a girl in a spoon hat.
Carly, Carly, Carly.
Carly Shay? Carly.
Carly.
Where you at? Carly? Carls.
Dude.
Read Carly's text.
She wrote, "hey, I got an awesome idea "for iCarly.
"You and Sam meet me "in our studio right after school.
" Well, look around.
Do you see her anywhere? Wait.
Snap, what's this? Read it.
"Here's a sweet dessert "from to the iCarlys.
Hugs and tickles, Nevel.
" Nevel? How'd he get this up here? I don't know, but there's no way I'm eating anything that Oh my God.
Oh.
Oh.
Heads up! Oh, boom! That was horrible.
Not funny.
No.
It was extremely funny.
Pranked ya! Admit it, I got you good.
You got us.
Nice job, kid.
Thank you.
But I couldn't have done it without help from the king of pranks here.
She's right.
Man, I forgot how much fun pranking is.
Did you feel the rush? Whoo! Easy there, Texas.
Don't go gettin' all prank-happy.
Nah, I won't.
Can't stop you know we'll never give it up people talk but we just don't care in this life you know you gotta live it up so everybody put your hands in the air it's an all-night party that we're gettin' into if you think it's all over then the joke is on you it's a dream, it's a scene and it's all brand-new if you think you can't stop then the joke is on you it's an all-night party that we're gettin' into if you think it's all over then the joke is on you it's a dream, it's a scene and it's all brand-new if you think you can't stop then the joke is on you we did it.
We did it again we did it.
We did it again we did it.
We did it again we did it.
We did it again it's an all-night party that we're gettin' into if you think it's all over then the joke is on you it's a dream, it's a scene and it's all brand-new if you think you can't stop then the joke is on you you gotta knock it off with the pranking you're right put your hands in the air it's an all-night party that we're gettin' into if you think it's all over then the joke is on you it's a dream, it's a scene and it's all brand-new if you think you can't stop it all-night party that we're gettin' into if you think it's all over then the joke is on you it's a dream Come on, Dora.
You're the one with the map.
Don't hey, why'd you turn that off? I'm turning you off.
I don't understand.
Sign this.
Hmmm.
I don't generally sign things unless I have Socko's lawyer take a look Sign it.
I don't even know what this is.
It's a contract that says, "I, Spencer Shay, hereby promise "to never prank "anyone ever again as long as ye shall live.
" What is ye? Ye is you.
It sounds official.
Sign it.
What if I don't? Well, then I might sneak into your room tonight and push a pillow over your face 'till you stop kicking.
That's some pretty dark stuff.
This isn't funny.
You're pranking is out of con Hey.
Did you get him to sign it? Oh.
Oh.
Wooo! Yes.
Yeah.
Looks like you guys fell for my plexiglas-in-front- of-the-elevator t.
Wooo! Dude, if I didn't have a little crush on you, you'd be falling for my baseball-bat-to-your face bit.
Little crush? Did he sign the contract or not? No.
All right.
You guys want me to sign your pretty little contract promising that I won't pull pranks anymore? Will that make the little children happy? Yes.
Kinda.
Ocho.
Fine.
I'll sign it.
Carly, grab me that pen.
Thank you.
And by signing it, that means that you have to honor your word and Yeah.
You fell for my shock pen prank.
Woo! Woo-hoo! Let me see this thing.
I'll check his pulse.
What are you telling Carly? To bring Spencer down here in two minutes.
All right, Gibby.
You know what to do? Yup.
Wait, no.
You climb up that ladder all the way up that pipe.
Then you scooch along the pipe 'till you get right over that $20 bill there.
I scooch.
And when Spencer bends over to pick up the 20, I'm gonna yell Gibby Then you drop down right onto Spencer's back.
But that seems so naughty.
That's right.
It's gonna teach Spencer that it's not fun to get pranked.
True chiz.
I'm still afraid to pee.
I looked up catheters and do you even know where they put oh.
You're climbing.
You're climbing.
Climbing.
Here we go.
Hide.
What are we doing in the basement? I just need you to help me bring up this box of iCarly props.
Sure thing.
Where it is? Just over here.
Watch your step.
Oh, hey, there's a $20 bill on the floor.
Weird.
It's not mine.
Then I guess it's mine.
Nice try.
Yeah.
Dang it.
How'd you know? Oh, face it.
I'm the king of pranks.
And you know what they say? "You can't touch the king.
" Who says that? The king.
I knew he'd say that.
'Yo Holmes, I'll prank you later.
Woo-hoo, woo-hoo, woo ,hoo he slapped with me with my own money.
Let's get outta here.
Wait, we forgot Gibby.
Oh, yeah.
Gibby.
Gibby.
Did you guys hear my ribs crack? How long did the doctor say you have to wear the cast? Six weeks.
Well, it's your own fault.
You jumped off that pipe for nothing.
You said my cue was Gibby and I heard Gibby.
Yeah, but you didn't hear the cue on guys.
Okay, yes.
No, I didn't get it.
How could you do that? Hey, you guys.
Why don't we just you guys.
What,T-bo? You guys gotta do something about Spencer.
The boy's gone too far.
What he do now? He gave this fancy face cream from Europe.
It says it makes your face all smooth.
Yeah? Well, my face is already smooth.
So I gave it to my friend Lucas here.
His face has dry patches.
And? Kevin, kill the lights.
Whoa.
Turn them back on.
Glow in the dark face cream? What kinda sick man thinks that's funny? I'm sorry.
Tell that to Lucas.
Now he can't go see a movie.
Y'all better do something about Spencer.
Uh-huh.
What are we gonna do? I told you.
You guys tell Spencer we're going bowling and then I sneak up behind put a nunchucks away.
It's all my fault.
Why yours? He knew he had a problem.
He didn't wanna help me but I sucked him back into pranking and now he can't stop.
Look, I've seen this kinda thing before.
He's not gonna stop until he hits rock bottom.
I hit rock bottom.
Spencer already hit rock bottom in ninth grade.
The garlic powder in all those kids' eyes.
Oh, yeah.
Well if we could all keep open mind about the nunchucks then hey Just sayin'.
What if we remind Spencer about what happened? I'm lost.
I could call those kids that he went to school with.
The garlic powder victims? Yeah.
And invite them over, you know, so they can make him remember the pain that his pranks can cause people.
That's good.
Mama likey.
What's going on here? We're here to help you.
Help me what? Who are all these people? Wait a second.
Wait a second.
Tancy? Jeff? Mario? What why are you guys here? To remind you of what happened in the ninth grade.
But what we hear you're pranking again.
Well, yeah, but just for fun.
Have you forgotten what happened to our eyes? Come on.
That was like fifteen years ago.
And I didn't know that garlic powder would okay, wait, wait, wait.
I wanna get this on video.
Why? So I can show it to you if you ever get outta control with your pranking again.
Yes.
This must be videoed.
Help me! Help me! What's going on? Run.
What happened? My old classmates beat me up.
But they were just supposed to help you get the message about your pranking.
Message received.