The Madame Blanc Mysteries (2021) s04e03 Episode Script

1
TEXT ALER
HE SIGHS
It is so hot tonight.
I think I might melt like an ice cream.
Look, I'm sorry about the time,
Thomas. I'm finished now.
I don't shut till 10:30.
I don't mind how long you stay.
It's good to know there is someone
else for her to stare at.
- Pardon?
- Her.
She leaves for Paris tomorrow,
and I will not be sad to see her go.
Yeah. Hathor's on tour.
- The goddess of intoxication.
- Ah!
The story goes that the sun god Ra
ordered her to destroy all humanity
because of their bad behaviour.
Oh. Mon Dieu.
But just at the last minute,
Ra changed his mind.
So he decided to flood a field
with beer and he dyed it red,
so she thought she was gorging
on the blood of humankind,
but actually she was
getting very, very drunk.
Humanity was saved by a hangover.
Also, rumour has it that
every Hathor statue is cursed.
Oh.
Well, like I said,
I will be glad to see her leaving.
HORN HONKS
Oh.
Looks like your young man
is here for you.
Oh, no, no. He's not me young man.
He's just a really good friend.
Yeah, well, thanks, Thomas.
Good night.
HE CHUCKLES Just good friends, huh?
Mm.
ALARM
Do you remember the first time ♪
That my eyes set on you? ♪
Your smile came from nowhere ♪
For sometime never. Or sometime soon ♪
The road is a long one ♪
I was only passing through ♪
I was only passing through. ♪
It's dead exciting, isn't it?
Even better than the ones on the telly.
Although I wish I'd dressed
up a bit now, you know?
What do you mean?
Well, when you see
an auction on the telly,
the punters all get dressed up,
don't they? Have their hair done.
But you're not on the telly.
It's not about being
on the telly, is it?
It's out of respect for all the stuff.
I blame you for his recent interest
in boxes of rubbish.
Treasure, Glo, not rubbish.
Thank you so much for this, Jean.
With Jeremy's birthday next week,
I just didn't know what to buy him.
Well, when I saw that box
of Victorian ephemera,
I thought that'll perfect
for Jeremy's phantasmagoria room.
Oh, Gloria, I meant to tell you,
thank you so much
for letting us use your van.
Oh, you're welcome, love.
Mind you, I've no idea
where I'm gonna put that.
Oh, Jean, by the way,
when can I pick up my sapphire necklace?
Nancy's daughter's
getting married tomorrow.
It's supposed to be
her something borrowed.
- Anytime. It's at the shop.
- Oh, marvellous.
Oh, Jean, I've always wanted to do this.
- Can I do the bidding?
- Fill your boots.
How terribly rude.
You'd never see that happen
on the television.
Merci. Et voila.
Oh, my God!
Mum?!
Hey, can I help you
to sort through the treasure?
If you want. You have found treasure?
Not really. It's not
the best morning we've ever had.
Athenian red figure.
This is not bad at all, Jean
530 BC.
This is everything?
Just a few more boxes.
It's dead exciting, isn't it?
Oh, hello, Simone.
Don't worry, love.
Let's call it even.
I'm not here for you.
But I am parched.
I could murder an espresso.
Oh. Er I will make some coffee.
I will help you.
Jean, I need a big favour.
And I think you owe me one
after practically accusing me
of murder last year.
OK. Right, remember our mums lived
round the corner from one another?
Yeah. Of course.
OK, now keep up.
This is the box of Victorian ephemera
that I won at the auction this morning.
So what's that got to do with our mums?
I'm coming to that. Well,
everyone knows that I'm the only one
who collects the weird stuff round here.
And they've slipped something
into the box to send me a message.
What?
Me mum's ring.
What? That's your mum's actual ring?
Yes, it's a warning.
Someone at home's after me
through me mum.
- Are you sure it's her ring?
- Absolutely.
Look, it's got her initial
on the front. V for Vera.
And get your loupe.
Oh. Hang on.
Look on the inside of the ring.
"Sing as we go."
Is that the Gracie Fields song?
Rochdale's finest
and me mum's favourite.
Me dad bought it her years ago.
Oh. Erm I don't understand.
It's a warning.
And I know exactly who it is.
An old enemy of mine's
just got out the clink
back in Manchester,
and it's gonna take me a few days
to put him back in his box.
Me cousin's bringing Mum out now.
She won't fly, so it'll
take ages on the ferry.
She needs to be with me
till I sort my dear old friend out.
- And?
- Well, the thing is,
she doesn't know about my, erm,
business interests.
- Go on.
- She, erm
thinks I run an antique shop.
Oh. Oh, I see.
You want to pretend
that you run my antique shop?
Bingo!
Oh, is that all?
No protection? No extortion?
I'm not an animal, Jean.
But if you do this one thing for me,
we'll call it even.
Well, that's an offer I can't refuse.
MOBILE PHONE RINGS
Oh. Excuse me.
Hi.
Yeah, yeah, I know it well.
Right. I'll I'll be right there. OK.
That was Caron. There's been
an incident at the library.
Can you give me a lift?
Oh, Madeline's at home.
I can drop you off to collect her
if you like. Oh, right.
OK. Erm So, erm, Mr John Marsden here
will be doing
a bit of work experience today.
So, erm, if you could just show him
the ropes, ladies,
that would be great. Thank you.
- Give my regards to Karen.
- Yeah.
It is pronounced Caron.
I know, sweetheart, just having a laugh.
Hmm. Oh, she's not worked a till
since the Firtree pub
when she was on salad bar.
CAMERA CLICKS
What on earth's going on?
Thomas was attacked, Jean.
No!
Why? Is he all right?
He is fighting for his life.
Oh, no. I'm so sorry.
This could ruin Sainte-Victoire Library.
What do you mean?
We have destroyed one of the rarest
figures in Egyptology.
"We" haven't destroyed anything.
That's how they will see it.
Now, listen to me, Suzanne.
We're gonna find out who is responsible
for this horrific act of sabotage.
Do you hear me?
And we're gonna find out
who hurt Thomas. Look
..let's just decide
that Thomas is gonna be OK.
And in a couple of months' time,
he'll be back in here
stinking the place out
with his Roquefort, as usual.
Thank you, Jean.
I'll come back later
and check on you. OK?
I think she's in shock.
What about you?
I think I'm in shock.
Thomas is such a sweetheart.
Which is all the more reason
we need to find out
who is responsible for this.
Yeah. Thank you.
MOBILE PHONE VIBRATES
Caron?
I really want to give you a hug.
Well, nobody's watching.
Come here.
Yours, I believe.
Er, yes, yes. Thank you. Thank you.
I love watching you do that.
What?
That twisty thing you do when
you pin your hair up in the morning.
It's dead, erm, chic.
SHE SNIGGERS
That's the first time I've been
called chic in my entire life.
Well, it will not be
the last time, Jean White.
Jean, we have some information.
Can you come to the station with me?
Yes. Yes, of course.
Of course. Yes.
Oh, yes, I better get back to work.
I'll speak to you later, Jean, yeah?
Yeah.
A neighbour was returning
from his night shift
and saw an orange moped
driving away from the library
at midnight last night.
So this is the CCTV?
Not from near the library,
but round the corner.
It is registered
to a Gaynor Smith. English.
She's 18 years old
and lives in university halls.
Right. So, erm, how can I help?
I need to interview her,
but I don't want to bring her in.
I think a less formal approach
might be more successful.
Teenage girls
have never been my strong point.
Even when I was a teenage boy.
Oh, you want me to come with you?
Oh! Of course. No problem.
Well, back through the mists of time,
I once was a teenage girl myself.
Ha! Come on, then.
- 'Hello?'
- Police.
'Oh. You better come in.'
DOOR BUZZES
Hello. I am Inspector Caron.
This is my colleague, Jean White.
Can we come in?
Oui.
Nous nous sentons un peu fragiles.
They are a bit fragile.
Hm. No kidding.
We both speak English.
That would be easier
for my colleague. Thank you.
- Your names, please.
- Nellie Ocase.
Gaynor Smith.
A serious crime
was committed last night.
And a bike that is registered
to you, Gaynor,
was seen near the scene at midnight.
Oh. She's gone. Cindy is gone. Oh, God.
Who's Cindy?
My bike. That's her name.
Cindy's been stolen.
So your bike has been stolen?
Clearly, yes. My mum's gonna go mad.
It was parked right out there.
Where were you last night?
We had a date
with a couple of bottles of vodka.
Bacon sandwich,
white bread and a pint of tea.
Pardon?
Best hangover cure ever.
I'm a vegetarian.
SHE RETCHES
Can you prove where you were?
Yes.
Here.
Looks like you had a good night.
Ah. After midnight.
Hmm.
This is my card.
If you could send me those photos,
I will be able to eliminate you
from my inquiries.
OK.
We will see ourselves out.
Thank you.
RETCHING
Thanks for getting us out of there.
I was starting to feel
a bit queasy meself.
Mmm.
I think I'll go and talk to Suzanne,
see how she's doing.
Good idea.
TEXT ALER
I will double check
the CCTV pictures. Keep me updated.
Oh, could you forward me
that picture, please?
Of course.
Thanks.
LAUGHTER
You're an absolute scream, Charlie.
I was just going to say the same,
Monsieur Marsden.
Not what I expected at all.
Oh. And we have
your lovely Simone in common.
Eh, Simone. Tell your Charlie
about our high-vis vest scam.
I'm not sure I can remember.
Got us in everywhere.
Er, she certainly did,
cos I remember saying,
"How do you make neon nylon
look so good?"
And you said
You say that all of the time.
Does she?
Aw, that's what I loved most
about Simone, the way she owned it.
Or not, as the case may be.
THEY LAUGH
ENTRANCE BELL JANGLES
Merci.
Why don't you two
bob out for a spot of lunch.
I can look after things here.
Oh, that is so kind of you.
Are you sure?
Yeah, course I'm sure. Off you pop.
OK, I'll grab my bag.
I'm not too sure
we should leave the shop.
Now, now, Simone,
you above anyone should know
I've looked after bigger
business than this.
Have a belter of a lunch
and I'll take care of everything here.
Yeah. Ah! There is just one thing.
These are the returns from the workshop.
This necklace will be collected
by a lady called Judith Lloyd-James.
It is very important to her.
No problem.
Merci. I'm so relieved I did not forget.
Believe me, she is not somebody
you want to be on the wrong side of.
Well, thanks for the heads up.
So we're at a dead end unless
we find out who stole that moped.
Who'd steal an orange moped?
What?
It's a bit obvious, innit?
What do you mean?
Well, if you're gonna nick a moped,
surely you'd choose one
that was a bit less conspicuous.
Ooh, get you, Detective Dom.
Been knocking about with you.
Bound to rub off at some point.
Is that right?
Come on.
Oh. Thank you.
Thanks. Thanks.
Ta.
How are you doing?
Not good.
I just spoke to Thomas' family.
They are at the hospital now.
I don't know what his wife Maureen
would do if he
Let's think back
over the past few weeks.
Now, is there anyone
Thomas could have upset?
Well, Thomas could be
very verbose, as you know.
And he was a stickler for details.
His visitors book had to be just so.
Could I have a look at
the visitors book, please?
Yeah, of course.
See. Black ink only.
Everything in the correct column.
Mais oui. I forgot. Dr Aligiah.
He's a renowned Egyptologist
at the university.
He brought a group of students
to look at the statue,
and one of them started to shout
about how disgusting it was
for the Louvre to steal
precious items from Egypt.
So what happened?
Thomas tried to calm him down,
but the student kept shouting
in Thomas's face
about giving back the stolen goods.
Well, the restitution of artefacts
is a very touchy subject.
It got very heated,
and Dr Aligiah quickly
gathered his group up and left.
Hm. Have you got his contact details?
He should be at the university
if you want to ask him about it.
Do you think one of his students
could have done such a thing?
I don't know. But I'm gonna find out.
You've got very good taste.
My nan had one of these.
Now, let's get it wrapped up for you.
A positive plethora of
Both of you, behind the counter.
You're in charge.
I see you.
I'll wait out here for you.
You sure?
Yeah. I want to give Claudie a ring.
The time difference is about right.
Plus, universities
always make me feel a bit
less than, you know?
How do you mean?
Full of posh people, aren't they?
Don't be daft! I went to one.
And you know all that stuff
about astronomy
and every lyric of every song
that's ever been written.
Yeah, but that's not
clever, clever, is it?
That's just cos I had
a karaoke compering job
when I was younger.
Leaves an indelible mark
on the subconscious.
See? I think you're dead clever.
Yeah. Thanks.
Right, see you later.
Gotcha.
Thank you for seeing me, Dr Aligiah.
Oh, you caught me between lectures.
Oh, so you lecture in Egyptology?
Yes. Specifically on
the importance of deities.
Sorry, I'm Jean White.
I'm a specialist in antiques.
And sometimes I help
the police out with their inquiries.
Police?
Yeah.
Erm, do you remember
the security guard at the library
when you took your students to see
the Hathor statue on tour last week.
How can I forget it?
The students had been told to keep
the politics neutral for the day
and concentrate on the history.
It was so embarrassing.
But surely the police
do not need to get involved.
I'm sorry to have to tell you this,
but last night
that security guard
was found unconscious
after a vicious attack.
What?
And, erm, in the attack,
the Hathor statue was found
irreversibly damaged.
Hathor? I mean, this is
This is tragic.
Er, both of these things,
utterly tragic.
Erm, do you have a list of the students
that attended the library last week?
Well, like the subject I teach,
I am also a little historic.
I keep paper copies of everything.
Er, here we are.
A list of the students who attended.
Oh, great.
Can I keep this?
Of course.
Right.
Thank you. Is that your son?
Oh, yes. Matteo.
I'm very proud. He's doing his PhD
on Egypt and their stolen treasures.
He was with me that day at the library.
He did get quite passionate,
but he'd never do anything like this.
Mm. And is that your daughter?
No. She's his girlfriend.
'She, too, is studying at university.'
Oh. Well, thank you.
You're welcome.
Listen, right,
I've gotta go, Claudie.
I'll speak to you in a bit.
All right. Bye. Love you. Bye.
A girl who lives
at the university halls,
who was being sassy with Caron
this morning,
and Dr Aligiah's son
are in a relationship.
What?
Yeah.
I just saw a picture
of them together on his desk.
The girl's hair's a bit longer now,
but it's definitely her now.
Now, she's got a bedroom
next door to Nellie and Gaynor,
the girls who had the moped nicked.
So the girls with the moped,
the stolen one
Yeah. Just drive.
I'll break it down on the way.
MARSDEN ON VOICEMAIL:
'Hello, darlings. Slight hiccup.
'Some cheeky monkey has swiped
Mrs Lloyd-James's sapphire necklace
'from under my nose.
'But don't worry,
I'm just about to get it back.
'Stall your friend for me.
I won't be a tick.'
Oh, mon Dieu. C'est Judith.
Now, remember, Marsden, don't go mad.
You've just had this cleaned.
HE CHUCKLES
Hi-ya! Ha!
Ah! Hello again.
Erm, we were just wondering,
do you know where your neighbour is?
Lily? She's probably
at her boyfriend's. Matteo.
Erm, well, actually,
it was Matteo we wanted to talk to
concerning the theft of Gaynor's moped.
What? Really?
So, erm, do you know where he lives?
Yeah. I'll go write it down for you
now. Just give me one moment.
Thank you.
What is that smell?
Students.
Oh.
There.
Oh. Thank you. Merci.
OK. Bye.
- Caron?
- Yeah.
I've got Matteo's address.
How much longer, Charlie?
It's nearly 4pm.
I wanted to drop it in to her
before the rehearsal dinner.
She's marrying an American,
so I've no idea what that is,
but I know it begins soon.
Maybe you'd like some more coffee.
Ah! Here is Jean's associate now.
Oh, you must be Judith.
Amazing cheekbones.
Sorry about the delay, sweetie,
but I didn't think they'd done
a good enough job
for one of Jean's
favourite customers. Here you go.
Oh. How thoughtful.
Thank you so much. Pleasure.
Hang on.
Weren't you the chap that pipped me
to the post this morning
at the auction, denying my husband
his birthday present?
That box of Victorian ephemera.
Sorry about that, my love.
But let me put that right.
- Are you sure?
- Absolutely.
I've got similar ones already.
Well, thank you so much.
My husband will be thrilled.
You must let me pay you something.
Sorry, I didn't catch your name.
Oh, I'm John Marsden.
Well, thank you very much,
Mr Marsden. Or can I call you John?
You can, yeah. John. John Marsden.
Thanks.
DOOR BELL BUZZES
Jean!
Matteo!
Where were you last night?
I was with my girlfriend, Lily,
at the university halls
until about midnight.
And she can verify that?
Yes. Of course.
This is not the first time
I have borrowed Gaynor's scooter
to get home.
I've done it lots of times.
If you borrow something
without asking the owner,
it is technically stealing.
OK. I'm very sorry.
Richard?
Your father says
that you're very passionate
about the restitution of artefacts.
You've spoken to my father?
Who did this?
You were seen getting very upset
in the library that day.
What?
I think you smashed the statue
to sabotage the French ownership of it.
That is not true.
But you didn't expect a night
watchman and defended yourself
by nearly murdering him
with the paperweight.
No. No, no, no, no. You're wrong.
I would never destroy
something so precious.
I need to talk to you about something.
What, now?
It's very important.
Richard, start taking
his statements, please.
This is a fake.
Look, it's just two pieces
stuck together. It's hollow.
What do you mean, "hollow"?
In ancient Egypt
..the sacred statues
were always made in solid bronze.
The hollow casting technique,
it didn't come till years later.
I didn't question it before
because I just saw
the head had fallen off,
and that can happen to a solid figure.
So where on earth is the real one?
I can hold Matteo on theft of the bike.
We need a search warrant for his flat,
and now I think his father's house.
Maybe they were in it together
for the money?
Hm. I can believe
passionate sabotage from academics,
but not blatant theft.
I just don't think
it's about the money for them.
TEXT ALER
Oh. Excuse me.
Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm gonna have to go.
Keep me updated, eh?
Of course.
Quite clever when you
think about it, innit?
How do you mean?
Well, while you lot
were concentrating on the sabotage,
the real statue was long gone.
Probably been turned into an ashtray
for some dodgy billionaire.
Oh, the horror.
Don't even joke about that.
Jean! My sapphire looks wonderful.
John Marsden went above and beyond.
And he gave me a gift for Jeremy.
It's the box from the auction
this morning.
Wow. This is your lucky day, Judith.
Actually, what is it?
Ah, well, erm, this is a box of
CLEARS THROA
..erm, memento mori.
Ooh! What's "memento mori"?
Well, erm, in Victorian times,
it was considered a loving tribute
when someone passed away,
erm, that they were photographed
with the living.
Oh, no. You mean one of the people
in this photograph is dead?
Yeah. They would open up their eyes,
prop them up on cushions.
So I just bid good money
on pictures of dead people?
Good grief.
You can see this deceased lady here,
she's less blurry
because she's completely still.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Hang on.
Sorry.
Helen. Helen!
Erm, do you mind
if we pay someone a visit?
No.
Oh, hello. It's me again.
I wondered if I could have a quick word.
This is my partner, Dom.
I mean, my work partner, Dominic.
Yeah. Come in.
How's your head?
A bit better.
I heard about Matteo and the statue.
His girlfriend lives next door, you know.
Mm.
Is, erm
Is Nellie around.
She nipped to the shops
for some hangover munchies. Right.
Do you remember
this picture being taken?
I can't really remember much
if I'm being totally honest.
It turned into a bit
of a big night in. Right.
So, you're left handed?
Yeah. Why?
Well, it's just on this photo,
you're holding your drink
in your right hand.
Would you do that often?
God, no. Even drunk.
Well, especially when I'm drunk.
I would never use my right hand.
How weird. Mm.
See, I'm starting to think that
you never used your hand at all.
Pardon?
I think you were drugged, asleep
and propped up in a photograph
to provide someone with an alibi.
What?
So, is this Nellie's side of the room?
Yeah.
Well, that's how she picked the lock.
So that wasn't your hairpin
I found then. Yours, I believe.
Er, no, love. But you were
so chuffed that you found it
I didn't have the heart to tell you
that I only used blonde ones.
Gaynor, can you tell me as much as
you can remember about last night?
Well, after about 9:45,
not a lot, really.
Why specifically 9:45?
Well, our takeout arrived at 9:30.
It showed up on my app.
Then we ate and drank more vodka.
But we had loads before.
I honestly can't remember much.
Do you mind if we take
a quick look around?
Yeah, help yourselves.
Great. Dom?
Jean.
Right. I need you to text Nellie.
Tell her the police called about Matteo,
and she needs to get
to the police station straightaway
to help Jean and Caron
with their inquiries.
OK? Thank you.
Entrez, je vous prie.
Is this something to do with Ma
Take a seat.
How did you know?
It was some pictures of deceased
Victorians that gave me the clue.
I realised that
your alibi photo was fake.
You'd put Gaynor's glass
in the wrong hand.
And your name was on the visitors list
when you did your little recce.
I missed it first time round
because you used
your official name, Helen,
and not your everyday name, Nellie.
I had an Auntie Nelly, you see,
and we only ever called her Helen
when she'd been badly behaved.
You must have thanked the heavens
when Matteo stole Gaynor's scooter.
The heat was off you, wasn't it?
This is how I think you did it.
'You got your flatmate drunk on vodka
'while I assume you drank water.
'And then when your food arrived,
you slipped her a sleeping draught.
'Well, she would never have
tasted it eating a curry.
'And when she was dead asleep,
around 9:45,
'you stole the scooter
and you went to the library,
'knowing full well that Thomas
never locked up before 10:30pm.
'So you snuck in, and opened
the glass box with a hairpin.
'You then stole the statue
'and intended to replace it
with a broken fake one,
'suggesting sabotage.'
'But Thomas caught you.
'So, in a panic, you attacked him.'
I didn't mean that. It was an accident.
An accident that has left a man
fighting for his life.
'You then rode back to the dorm
and faked the photo,
'implying that you'd
been there all night.
'But why?'
We are not going anywhere, Nellie.
Just
..money.
Simple. I am on my own in the world.
And even
with the cheapest accommodation,
I still struggle to make ends meet.
Most students work a part-time job
to pay their way.
Most students have
other people helping them.
Like I said, I have no one.
I saw the exhibit on the tours in
the library every couple of months.
And I thought how easy
it would be to steal one.
So I came up with a plan.
I knew this one was coming
from the Louvre
..so I did my research.
And I found a buyer in Paris.
And it was very easy
to find a copy online.
And you thought
no-one in this backwater town
would ever know the difference.
I never meant to hurt Thomas.
I am truly sorry for that.
Not as sorry as his wife, Maureen.
And the dog says,
"Make mine a double."
LAUGHTER
Right, you sit there, ladies.
I'm gonna get some drinks in.
Only champagne's good enough for my mum.
Aw.
- Have you got any more?
- No.
A couple of bottles
of your finest bubbles, please. Oui.
Hiya!
Not your lucky day, is it, sweetheart?
Aw.
Thank you. What a day!
Passing through. ♪
Sub extracted from file & improved