Charmed s04e04 Episode Script

Don't be tense.
Be ready.
When you see me expand, you contract.
If I contract, you expand.
If you wanted to be on top, all you had to do was ask.
Paige.
What are you doing down here? Shouldn't you be upstairs studying for Piper's quiz? Well, I was kind of hoping to go a couple of rounds with the demon first.
I should tell you, Piper takes her witchcraft quizzes very seriously.
You'd better be prepared.
- What's the subject? - Potion basics.
- Well, you gotta start somewhere.
- I know.
It's just all book learning.
Phoebe? Paige, Piper and I had to learn how to be witches the hard way.
And it took Well, it took too long.
We need you to get there faster.
Our lives might depend on it.
Appealing to my conscience.
Such a low blow.
I just wanna know when the fun stuff starts.
So where were we? Training.
Come on, Cole.
You were gone for a whole week.
That is seven long, lonely nights.
I was on a fact-finding mission.
We can't ignore what I learned.
Yeah, I know.
The Source wants us dead.
No, you don't know.
He needs you dead.
Ever since we escaped, factions have been forming to challenge him.
He must finish what he started if he expects to survive.
Which means that you need to be prepared.
You think The Source is gonna challenge me to a sword fight? Hand-to-hand is too safe.
Sword fighting teaches confidence, intensity.
You need to learn how to fight like a demon.
Training must come before everything including us.
- Are you ready? - Do I have a choice? Yenlo.
This is how you repay my father? After all he taught you? - Everything he gave you? - What did he give me, Anling? I was supposed to replace him.
But he passed me over for you.
Yenlo, you took everything you've learned from here and used it for your own gain.
You've brought disgrace upon yourself and our monastery.
Now leave us and never return.
You heard my father.
I'm gonna kill him, Anling.
And then I'm gonna kill you.
You can't stop me.
You're half the student I was.
You think this is the end? We're just getting started.
Okay, after mixing your potion what's the best method to preserve unused sea slugs for future use? A, pickle them, B, sugar them, C, smoke them, D, freeze-dry them.
Well, now you see, if I had extra sea slugs I'd let those little suckers go right on back into the ocean.
D, freeze-dry them, is the correct answer.
- I was gonna guess that.
- Why are you guessing at all? - To pass? - Paige, this isn't like trig, you know.
It's not like you're never gonna use it again.
If you blow a potion, innocent people could die.
Did you study at all for this test? Well, I started to last night.
It's just, a friend from work came over and she knew this bouncer at this club and I'm sorry.
It's okay.
I was single once.
- Why don't you study tonight- - I can't.
I have a guy coming over here, and we're going out.
Here? What's wrong with your place? This place is slightly more impressive than mine.
Look, Paige, I really, really wanna be the cool big sister but this is ridiculous.
You have no priorities.
That is not true.
I've left work to fight demons.
That's why I have to go out tonight.
The boss' son is in town this weekend.
You think showing him a good time is gonna improve your career standing? Well, yeah.
Okay, listen to me very carefully.
There is nothing more important than learning your craft right now.
We could be attacked at any moment.
Then why am I stuck here reading? I should be learning how to body-slam sweaty demons, like Phoebe.
Phoebe's been at this a lot longer than you have.
But trust me.
Be patient and study hard and one day you will get a big, sweaty demon of your own.
- Where are you going? - Chinatown.
I need to stock up on some of these herbs.
Can I go? I can get my nails done.
- You need to work on your potions.
- Come on.
Paige, don't make me the wicked witch of the northwest.
I didn't ask for this big sister gig.
And, frankly, it sucks.
But since I'm on a roll, you should get rid of that lollipop habit because it's gonna rot your teeth.
I think it's twisted.
Stand up.
I just need a time-out.
The Source won't give you a time-out.
Now get up.
I said that I can't.
Cole, what's the matter with you? Demons worship strength, power, nothing else.
To beat The Source, you have to channel all your energy into strength including pain.
Let go of me.
I can do it.
I don't want anything to happen to you.
Let's go.
I'm ready.
I need to stay here, protect you from Yenlo.
You cannot protect me from him, not where he's gone.
Only the Dragonblade can stop him now.
Take this to Master Kwan.
He's an old friend.
He'll understand.
But what if Yenlo finds you first? Then you will become master, and you'll know what to do.
Anling, I did not pass over Yenlo because you were my daughter.
I did so because you are the superior student.
Now hurry, before he comes back.
I'll follow you in the shadows.
Go.
Next up, some powdered toadstool.
Let's kick it up one more notch.
What are you doing? You know.
Just preparing for The Source.
- Oh, is he coming over for dinner? - No.
Piper's got me mixing potions.
Why, I don't know.
Phoebe gets to fight.
Phoebe gets to levitate.
I get to cook.
Well, you know, your sisters' active powers took a long time to develop.
And Phoebe's been studying martial arts for years.
Yeah, but we're magic.
We should be able to skip over all that crap.
Well, there are no shortcuts.
Even with magic.
Anyway, you're half whitelighter, which means you're half pacifist.
You may never develop the power to fight like Phoebe.
And you might wanna check your potion.
It's bubbling over.
Just once, I'd like to know what it's like to be Phoebe and be able to kick some serious ass.
- How did I get down here? - Never drop your guard.
What is wrong with you, Phoebe? What did you just call me? You really took a shot if you can't remember your name.
Oh, no.
I am so screwed.
And so frosted.
- Are you okay? - No.
I mean Yes.
Just wait here.
I told you, no unscheduled breaks during training.
I am training.
I'm doing stairs.
Oh, I don't look so good.
What's going on? Don't worry, Phoebe.
It's me, Paige.
We switched bodies.
What? What did you do? Why do you automatically assume it was something that I did? - Paige! - All right, all right, I did it.
But it was an accident, I swear.
I just wanted to know what it was like to be you and somehow the potion I was working on just sort of blew up.
You wanted to be me? Are you crazy? Okay, okay.
We gotta fix this.
- What ingredients did you use? - I'm not sure.
Just please don't tell Piper.
She already thinks I'm a screwup as it is.
Hello! Paige! We are in each other's bodies.
I think Piper is the least of our problems.
Okay, fine, I won't tell her.
Now wipe that look off my face.
Thanks.
- God, this top is tight.
- Yeah, but it sure looks great.
So.
Ready to get back at it? - Yeah, just a minute- - Not you.
Phoebe.
Sure, sugar.
Whatever you say.
Let's go work up a sweat.
Just a minute.
Actually, Phoebe has to stay with me.
She has to help me with the potion.
It blew up in my face.
Is that true? Well, so let me ask you something, Phoebe.
Why did you ask me to train you? I mean why are we wasting our time? You're not wasting your time, Cole.
- Phoebe told me how much she's- - I'm sorry, Paige.
This is between me and Phoebe.
If it's more important for you to help in the kitchen than to train for The Source then you don't have what it takes to vanquish him.
Please, let me know when that changes.
If we don't fix this soon, I am going to perm your hair.
Please, just listen to me.
You have no idea how important this is to me.
- Come back later.
- If I could come back later, I would.
- But I can't.
I need it now.
- That dagger is a family heirloom.
- It's not for sale.
- Excuse me? Do you have any wormwood? You don't understand.
I don't wanna buy it.
It's all right here in the note.
I don't read Chinese.
Wormwood? You have to help me.
My father needs the Dragonblade.
- He said your father- - My father's out of town till Tuesday.
You'll have to come back then.
Excuse me, I have customers.
Yes.
Hi.
Thank you.
Hi.
I need a sprig of wormwood, preferably small-stemmed.
Hey! Hey! Who are you? Anling.
I have it, Father.
No! Like I said, we're just getting started.
Father! Yenlo was a powerful disciple but he used my father's teachings for evil.
That's why my father passed him over for master.
And because he did, Yenlo swore vengeance on him.
Didn't you say you stabbed Yenlo when he first attacked? Yes, but he used his knowledge of the teachings to escape before he died.
Escape where? To a place where souls pass on their way to reincarnation.
It's a mystical region between life and death.
- Limbo.
- Yenlo somehow figured out a way to hide out there.
But if you stabbed him Metaphysical and magical laws are amplified in limbo.
As long as he stays there, his wound will never advance.
He can literally cheat death forever.
That's why I took the Dragonblade.
It has the power to trap human souls.
Now it's the only way to save my father.
You think he's still alive? Yenlo doesn't just want to kill my father.
He wants to punish him.
Holding him in limbo does that, it keeps his soul from being reborn.
Do you know how to get to this limbo? No, I never mastered that skill.
Well, then, we'll have to figure out our own way.
Phoebe! Paige! I can't let you do that.
I know you're powerful witches, but I can't put you in danger.
Yenlo will be coming for me next.
All the more reason you should be here, where it's safe.
No place is safe from Yenlo.
He can use any surface of water as a portal.
Maybe, but he can only stay in our world for short periods.
Otherwise, his wound will ultimately kill him.
You called? This is Anling.
Hi, I'm Paige.
I mean, Paige's older sister, Phoebe.
This is Paige.
Howdy.
Hi.
Paige here.
Okay, we've got a water-loving demon.
Phoebe, take Paige to the water main.
It takes two to turn off that rusty valve.
Water main.
Right.
Okay, Book of Shadows.
There's gotta be another way to get into limbo.
It's amazing how our wounds stop bleeding down here, isn't it? See? Doesn't even hurt.
This place was not meant for us to stay, Yenlo.
Tell me about it.
I always expected the entrance to reincarnation to be a nice river or even pearly gates.
Last thing I expected to see was a big sucking hole.
It's never too late for redemption.
If you enter that vortex, you'll cleanse your soul start life fresh.
Yeah, as a tapeworm.
Or maybe even a dung beetle.
I know how karma works.
Besides, I've worked too hard in this life to give it all up now.
You're evil, Yenlo.
- You have nothing in this life.
- I have you! Which means now your student-reject has a purpose.
I figure why stop at just one Zen master when I can rid the world of two, or 20 or 100? All their wisdom and magic lost forever in limbo.
Now, that's evil.
And have I not taught you that you can never escape your karma? No one can.
But then again nobody's ever escaped from limbo before, have they? How did you do it? I see no water as a portal to return to Earth.
I was worried about that at first.
But then I remembered that every cloud has a nice, wet, watery lining.
Well, I'm off to find your daughter and kill her.
Wish me luck.
- Careful.
Don't break my nails.
- Forget your nails.
You almost got us busted.
Next time, smile and nod when we're together.
Well, that might work for Piper but what about this demon that's on the loose? You're right.
We may have to fight.
- Can you levitate? - I haven't tried.
There, levitate and kick.
But first, could you lose the lollipop? My teeth have enough cavities.
Sorry.
Nervous habit.
Oh, my God, you are so bad for my image.
Piper is never gonna trust me with magic again.
Piper won't find out anything as long as we reverse the potion.
Well, I think I figured out how to mix a new batch but we're all out of powdered toadstool.
I know where to get some.
You stay here.
Avoid Piper at all costs.
And practice my power.
You may need it.
Can I help you? Sense of humour.
I really like that in a girl.
So are you ready to go, Paige? Paige.
- Mason, hi.
How are you? - I'm fine.
- Do I know you? - No, no, but I know you.
I feel like I know you, seeing as how Paige can't stop talking about you Mason, the boss' son.
He's as cute as you said he was.
Well, nice to see you.
Bye.
No, wait.
- Aren't you guys going for dinner? - Yeah, is Italian okay? Chinese.
You must have Chinese.
Chinatown Chinese, even better.
That's cool.
Okay.
Okay.
So you two kids have fun.
And keep my face out of the sun.
- Who was at the door? - Oh, just Paige's date.
She's still going on her date? What's with the lollipop? Paige sort of got me into them.
Phoebe, I gotta be honest.
I'm really starting to worry about her.
Why? What's wrong with Paige? Well, first of all, she made me realize I hate being the big sister.
And it's suddenly my responsibility to teach her how to be a witch and she doesn't listen to me.
She listens, sometimes.
Really? Because she's got me fooled.
And it's a shame because she might actually have a lot of potential.
Really? But the problem is, I don't think she cares about anything.
Oh, no, she cares.
I know she does.
You just have to give her a chance.
I think Paige is the kind of person that needs to learn from her mistakes.
And believe me, she's learning fast.
What is this place? I just gotta find some powdered toadstool.
Here it is.
Okay, I gotta warn you.
I'm not into the whole herbal scene.
Well, neither is Paige, I don't think.
You always talk about yourself in the third person like that? It's kind of a character flaw of mine.
So, what's the toadstool for? It's an aphrodisiac.
Really.
My dad was right.
He said you were "unique," I believe, is the word.
- What else did he say about me? If he doesn't hurry up and make you a social worker you'll probably start your own agency.
That or end up in jail, he wasn't sure which.
Sounds like me at that age.
You lost me again.
I'm not showing you a very good time, am I? I don't know.
We're in Chinatown, shopping for a sexual stimulant.
I'm surrounded by chicken claws and goat brains.
I haven't had this much fun in a long time.
Come to think of it, neither have I.
My boyfriend's not really big on the fun factor lately.
- Your boyfriend? - Ex-boyfriend.
- Yenlo.
- What's that, another aphrodisiac? I gotta go.
What are you doing? Just some exercises.
Levitating exercises.
So you've decided to make training your priority? Yes.
Absolutely.
Good.
We'll pick up where we left off.
Great.
Cool.
I'll throw a couple of low voltage energy balls at you you just try to avoid them.
Energy balls? Okay, now that's just rude.
I am not having fun! Fighting The Source isn't fun.
That's it, pal! You are not The Source and you do not treat your girlfriend this way.
Murderers, demons, phone solicitors, maybe.
But not your girlfriend.
- What's gotten into you? - Paige.
I mean I told Paige how you've been treating me and she just thinks you're way out of line, buddy.
Phoebe, you're the most important thing in my life.
If I don't push you hard, I will lose you.
You keep pushing her that way and you'll push her right out the door.
What do you mean, "her"? I meant me.
- You said "her.
" - Did I? Well, I'm just very angry, you know, because Well, you tore my jog bra.
And now I just- I have to go change.
There is actually nothing in here on how to reach limbo.
Should you have that water up here? What if Yenlo uses that as a portal? It's okay.
The surface is too small for him to enter.
So, what are you doing? My father could use water as a looking glass into other worlds.
Once when I was young, he reached into a bowl of water and picked me a plum from the Garden of Eden.
Can you see your father now? No.
I only see water.
I wish he were here.
He'd know what to do.
I better go check with the Elders.
Maybe they can help us reach limbo.
Sometimes I think Yenlo was right.
My father made the wrong choice.
Yenlo was always the better student.
Oh, I doubt that.
You beat him in battle.
But I didn't kill him.
I made him stronger.
Strong enough to remove my father's magic and wisdom from the world.
I don't feel worthy of following in his footsteps.
I understand.
I recently lost my big sister, who was pretty good at just about everything she did.
Very tough shoes to fill.
Where did you find the strength? I haven't yet.
But I'll let you know when I do.
Come on, with all this rain, we have to protect the house from Yenlo.
Cole.
- You scared me.
- Sorry.
I didn't mean to.
With the rain outside and everyone on Yenlo alert Yeah, Yenlo.
That's why I rushed home.
You're chilled.
Here, put this on.
You keep it.
I'm sorry.
Am I making you feel uncomfortable? - No, of course not.
I was just wondering what Phoebe would think about this.
Phoebe? Yeah, your girlfriend, Phoebe.
Remember? Yes, the problem with Phoebe is she's so obsessed with training she's not interested in romance anymore.
That's not true.
I mean, she- You, on the other hand, strike me as being full of passion, desire.
I miss that.
I gotta go.
Hey! How could you do this to me? Oh, come on, I'm just trying to have a little fun, Phoebe.
Isn't that what you were complaining about me not doing? Yeah, but I never meant for Did you just call me Phoebe? Would you rather I kissed her? - No.
- You know? - How do you know? - For one thing, you suck at levitating.
For another, you set me straight about the way I've been treating the real Phoebe, as only a sister could.
- You did? - Someone had to.
Okay.
I'm gonna go.
Let you guys work this out.
When you're yourself again give me a call.
We'll have some fun.
Okay, we've got to get back into our own bodies.
I am even getting confused.
Piper, look out! The Dragonblade.
Phoebe, stop him! Leo! Anling's hurt.
You two, follow me! All right, what the hell is going on? I was soaking some potion pots in the sink and I forgot to drain them.
That is not what I mean.
I smell something witchy.
Phoebe, what is wrong with your powers? Phoebe? I'm over here.
Don't get mad at her.
This is all my fault.
But, Paige, I agreed to keep it secret.
But I was the one that messed up the potion.
I wasn't concentrating.
I just guessed.
Oh, my God.
You guys switched bodies? Are you out of your minds? With everything we have going on, you pull a stunt like this? - It was an accident.
- Accidents like that get people killed.
We could have lost an innocent in there.
What if it wasn't Yenlo? What if it was The Source that broke in? You could've gotten us all killed.
Now we've lost our shot at Yenlo.
We have no idea how to get to limbo.
Wait a minute.
Do you remember what you put in that potion to switch bodies? Phoebe just picked up the ingredient we were missing.
Good, let's go.
All right, what else did you? I mean, you put in this? Just the powdered toadstool.
All right, soul sisters, back in your own bodies.
- I wanna be me again - I wanna be me again It's nice to see you, Paige.
It's nice to be seen, Phoebe.
My God, what did you have for dinner? Kung Pao chicken.
Sorry.
Okay, not to cut this reunion short, but we don't have a lot of time.
So the only person who knows how to enter limbo is in limbo himself.
And since we can't get to Anling's father down there my plan is to bring him up here, or at least his soul.
Wait, you wanna swap souls with Anling's father? He's the only one who knows how to get in.
Besides, it's the best way to surprise Yenlo.
It's too risky.
There's gotta be another way.
Did the Elders have any other ideas? No.
Then there's not.
Okay.
I wanna be the Zen Master.
You have a very brave sister.
- Father? - Yes, Anling, I'm here.
We don't have much time.
Where is the Dragonblade? I used it to fight Yenlo, but he knocked it out of my hands.
Phoebe, did you pick it up? No.
Paige? I haven't seen it.
Then who has the Dragonblade? What happened, old man? I don't know.
What happened? I was telling you how I stole the Dragonblade from your useless daughter when you blacked out.
I did? I mean, I did.
- If you say so.
- Who are you? I am one with the universe.
You think you can fool me? I was his disciple for 20 years.
Anling doesn't have the power to switch souls.
So you must be one of the witches.
Which means Anling and her father will come to rescue you.
The question is: How are they gonna get your soul back when I've got it? This is all we could find.
Then Yenlo must have the Dragonblade.
And used it to capture your sister's soul.
What does that mean? How do we get Piper back? We need to get the Dragonblade away from Yenlo.
Okay, so, what are we waiting for? Show us the way.
I should go alone.
Piper did this for me, to save my father's life.
No, she's our sister.
We'll all go.
Is that what you were fighting to save? My life? Of course, Father.
When we bring you back, their whitelighter can heal your wound.
He's a miracle worker.
I've seen him.
You are right, we should all go.
But it is a different realm down there with new rules.
Yenlo has had time to learn and adjust.
- Fine, then let's go.
- If you go you risk being pulled into the vortex.
Who would heal our injuries? He's right, Leo.
You should stay here.
Okay, here goes nothing.
Piper.
The Dragonblade, where is it? Quiet.
Look out! Father! Welcome to my turf.
Look, Yenlo's belt.
I didn't even call for it.
It just happened.
Our powers must be expanded here.
You get Piper's soul out of the Dragonblade.
I'm gonna keep Yenlo busy.
Oh, it's you.
Black Belt Barbie.
You're gonna be sorry you said that.
- Phoebe, what do I do? - I don't know.
Use your powers.
Orb her soul.
- Now what? - Put it back in the body! Thanks for the lift.
Untie me.
- We gotta do something.
- What? I don't have the power in this body.
Oh, my ankle.
I think it's twisted.
I need a time-out.
A time-out? - This will be easier than I thought.
- For me too.
Paige! Oh, my God, it's so beautiful.
What happened? Beats the hell out of me.
- Piper? - Hello.
The natural order of things has been restored including our souls.
But how? This was all a reflection on Yenlo's fears of a man afraid of crossing over.
In truth this is a peaceful place welcoming.
We need to get you home and heal your wound.
No.
I was mortally wounded.
It is my time to die.
To be reborn.
Their whitelighter can heal.
Anling you know better than to cling to the physical world the way you clung to my hand at the bridge.
But you're my father.
I'm no greater or less than anyone facing death.
That's the only lesson that keeps you from being a true Zen master.
Death is a part of life.
A transition, a rebirth.
Something that your young friends here have learned recently.
Yes.
Yenlo must be reborn too.
It is the natural order of things.
I love you.
And I'll always love you, Anling.
Does anyone know how to leave here? I think I know how to do it now.
Aloe plant, medicinal uses.
Taro root, magical herb.
Saint-John's-Wort, medicinal herb.
Ragged robin, magical herb.
Cupid's dart, strictly aromatic.
- And that one? - That is angelica.
And its use? I think it's used mostly to flavour fish.
She got every answer right.
So, what inspired the turnaround? Well, I kind of liked the power boost I had in limbo.
So it kind of made me wanna work harder faster.
Don't be in too big a hurry.
Trust me, you wanna fight like hell to keep a life separate from magic.
Hear, hear.
And having a guy around like Mason is not such a bad thing.
- Oh, you liked him? - Yeah.
Yeah? That's too bad.
He cancelled on me for tonight.
He said I was trying too hard and that I was not comfortable in my own skin.
So much for impressing the boss.
I can take comfort in the fact that he cancelled on Phoebe, and not me.
Hey.
Well, here comes your personal trainer from hell.
- Literally.
- Gotta go.
Hi.
Wait a minute.
Who are you? I know.
Paige.
So, what's on our training schedule for today? Light sabres? Actually, I was thinking we could have a private picnic of our own.
But what about training? - I have to be ready for The Source.
- I know, but not right now.
Right now, I was thinking I could take you to this great little picnic spot in the south of France.
- Really? - Really.