Gilmore Girls s04e04 Episode Script
Chicken or Beef?
- Crap!|- What's going on? Is it the smoke detector? Are we on fire? - Not the smoke detector, it's the alarm!|- What alarm? - Our alarm.
|- We don't have an alarm.
Then we have really angry rats.
- Did you cut your hair?|- I just trimmed it.
You didn't tell me|you were cutting your hair.
It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
A spur-of-the-moment "Let's not tell|my mother I'm pulling a G.
I.
Jane"? Are we seriously gonna have|this conversation now during the air raid? - You're right.
Come on.
|- What are we doing? I figured out that there is|a motion detector and if you stand over here,|it can't see you and it calms down.
- Great, so what now?|- We wait.
Why didn't you tell me you|were getting your hair cut? - It's just a trim.
|- To the Braille Institute, it's just a trim.
- Do you like it?|- Will you put it back if I don't? - Yes, I like it.
|- Thank you.
Thank God.
- Feels good when it's over.
|- This is crazy.
When did we get an alarm? Apparently, Kirk has recently joined the|Stars Hollow Security Company.
No.
And now that I'm|the pretty spinster living all alone he's concerned for my safety.
Did he tell you all this? You think I labeled myself|"the pretty spinster"? - What did you say?|- I haven't talked to him face-to-face.
I come home to this and there was|a note and his card and his gun.
And then when I called|the alarm-response center to complain about the alarm,|no one answered.
I had to leave a message with Meg.
|She sweeps up.
I can't even believe there's a|security company in Stars Hollow.
- Nothing ever happens here.
|- That's not true.
Plenty happens here.
- Like what?|- Like, people now break into your houses - and install alarm systems.
|- I heard about that.
- We have a new mail carrier.
|- We do? If you want your mail,|you have to go see Miss Patty.
- Why?|- 'Cause that's where he brings it.
He brings Babette's mail to Andrew,|Norma's mail to the deli and Taylor still hasn't found his,|which, I admit, is fun.
I rescind my previous statement.
|This place is hopping.
- So, did you eat yet?|- Nope.
I thought I'd let you feed me.
Sure.
I can feed you but I can't know|if you're getting your hair cut.
I'll never do anything again|without telling you.
Happy? I don't know.
I'm finding|this guilt thing rather satisfying.
No, where are you going?|Why did you do that? - I was gonna get my laundry!|- You made it mad! - I didn't mean to!|- Back in the corner! Back in the corner! No place like home! Yeah.
- Mom?|- Follow the Post-its.
Does our life seem at all ridiculous to you? I spent all morning|carefully tracking that motion detector.
What an excellent use of your time.
We're good as long as|we stay on the path.
- So I should follow the Yellow Stick Road?|- We'll be here all week.
Try the veal.
- Stop.
|- What? - Read.
|- Crouch down and hop.
Come on.
The motion-detector beam|at the top of the staircase dips very low over there.
You seriously want me|to crouch down and hop? Like a little hunchbacked bunny.
You know, I had decided|that if I ever went to therapy I was gonna leave you out of it, but now- Okay, you can stand up.
Did you at least call|the stupid security company again? Yes.
Meg sends her love.
Don't worry,|I'll stop by on my way to the inn.
What are your plans today,|Persis Khambatta? Today, I'm going to do nothing but hang out in town, read, veg drink coffee,|and have the perfect Stars Hollow day.
Look out.
I get to go over to the inn|and hear a contractor laugh at me every time I say,|"That won't cost too much more, right?" - Enjoy.
|- Late lunch at Luke's? You're on.
So which way do I go? Just follow the Post-its.
But they're going|in two different directions.
- They are?|- Look.
I must have kicked some|out of the way by accident.
- Which one do I take?|- Which one looks more intentional? - No Post-it path looks intentional.
|- I'm drawing a complete blank.
- You seriously don't remember?|- Sorry.
How are we supposed|to get out of our house? I hate Kirk.
- What's going on?|- I'm just setting things up for tomorrow.
- Tomorrow-|- Heads up! - What's-|- I think you may need to move.
Yeah, I kind of got that.
|Excuse me.
What's tomorrow? Tons of tulle|so that everything looks like frosting.
She's our only daughter.
Frost the town.
Now, where should we put the poster?|I want to make sure everybody sees it.
- What about next to the cake?|- Yes, next to the cake.
I'm so proud of her.
- Lane?|- Rory.
Have you heard of a phone?|As my friend it is your responsibility to use it to call me and tell me|my ex-boyfriend's wedding is on Sunday - so I'm not accidentally in it.
|- What? I was sitting out in the gazebo, reading and this guy almost brains me|with a stack of tablecloths.
That's right.
They're having the reception|in the town square.
Yes, and Lindsay was out there,|holding a giant picture of her with Dean.
- Did she see you?|- I don't think so.
- I do a good idiot run when I need to.
|- I'm sorry.
I meant to tell you.
I didn't know|you were coming home this weekend.
It totally slipped my mind.
|Things have been so crazy.
I just figured I'd tell you when we talked,|then we didn't.
I'm sorry.
Can you hold on for a sec? - Not cool, Lane.
|- I'm sorry, guys.
- Fourth time today.
|- I thought Rory was my mom.
- The resemblance is uncanny.
|- You should get your mom a bell like a cat.
What's going on? We're having a band meeting.
|We need to figure out a guitarist.
I think I got a splinter.
A splinter can get into your bloodstream - go straight to your heart, and kill you.
|- Why'd you tell me that? Whatever, dude.
This is lame.
|I'm gonna bail.
- Zack, come on.
|- We need to find a guitarist.
Right.
We have come too far|to let the band fall apart - just because Dave-|- Hey! - Do not say the "D" word, Lane.
|- But- Don't.
Dave is dead to me.
"Comprendo?" Dead.
Cover the mirror, rip a shirt.
|That guy doesn't exist.
- He just went to college, Zack.
|- He did not just go to college.
He walked out on his art, man.
|He walked out on his sound.
Do you think a sound is so easy to find?|Did you ever see that Glenn Miller movie? For two hours,|Jimmy Stewart's walking around "I got to find a sound.
|I got to find a sound.
" We had a sound, and Dave|took that sound to freaking California.
You don't come back from California, man.
|It changes you.
What, did you expect him|not to go to college? No true rock 'n' roller goes to college! Mick Jagger went to the|London School of Economics.
- What?|- Yeah.
And Dexter Holland of The Offspring|got his PhD in molecular biology at USC.
Greg Ginn of Black Flag|graduated from UCLA.
The guy from Bad Religion|got his master's in geology from UCLA.
And he's working on his PhD in evolutionary biology at Cornell.
Lane, she's your friend.
I'm sorry.
I'm going.
I'll call you later.
- Are you mad?|- No, I'm not.
I promise.
I'm just I was just a little surprised.
|I mean, Dean's wedding - I know.
|- But it's okay.
It just means I have to be more careful about where I go this weekend.
That's all.
I'll see you tomorrow.
|We're using the garage.
Guitar auditions.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Shut up.
Weezer did not go to Harvard.
- Not the whole band, just the lead-|- Get away from me! I mean it.
- Bye.
|- Bye.
- Hi.
|- Hi.
Were you- - I was at Lane's.
|- Right, Lane's.
So, you're home this weekend? Yeah, I ran out of clean clothes|and quarters so How are things? - Good.
You?|- Good.
- You like Yale?|- I love Yale.
And Connecticut State? - It's good.
|- Good.
I'm glad it's good.
Not that I would have had any recourse|if it wasn't but this makes my lack of recourse|a lot easier to deal with.
- So, I see you've taken over the town.
|- Yeah, Lindsay thought - She likes the gazebo, and-|- It's her wedding.
- It is her wedding.
|- And your wedding.
It's your wedding, too.
Yes, it is.
It's my wedding, too.
It's nice.
It's pretty.
It looks like heaven|or a Victoria's Secret commercial which, to some people,|is basically the same thing.
- Didn't know you'd be home this weekend.
|- It was just a spur-of-the-moment thing.
Because if I had known,|I would have, you know, invited you.
It's- I didn't want you to think|I was just not inviting you.
- No, I didn't think that.
|- I just figured you'd be at school.
- I just didn't know.
|- I know you didn't.
- I didn't want you to think-|- No, I don't think.
I go to Yale now.
They think for you.
But, since you are here, come.
- Come?|- Come to my wedding.
- Dean.
|- You and Lorelai, I want you to.
- Chicken or beef?|- What? Wait, beef.
Of course beef.
I mean, the two of you are definitely beef.
I mean,|not like you resemble beef or anything.
- You know, you don't even have to-|- Okay, so, noon at the church.
I'll be the one in the tux.
Don't worry, we didn't write our own vows|and no one's singing opera.
- I know you think that's lame.
|- No, it's a wedding.
It's supposed to be operatic.
Okay, so, I better get over there.
|Lindsay's expecting me.
- So, I'll just see you two tomorrow.
|- But - Now?|- Nothing.
- What about now?|- No, nothing.
Okay.
- Now?|- Nothing.
- Kirk, what's supposed to happen?|- What? I don't know what I'm|supposed to be looking for.
- Kirk?|- I'm not sure.
Kirk, please come downstairs.
Are you going to hurt me? I swear,|they told me it would be self-explanatory.
I just had to get in the main box and, in seconds, this would be disabled.
They didn't tell me I needed a key or that, if I didn't have a key,|I would be mildly electrocuted and then, after all that,|when I got in the box there's nothing self-explanatory about it.
- I was trying to do a nice thing.
|- I know.
Jimmy said he would install it for me,|because I do not have those skills yet.
- The class was full when I got there.
|- That's okay.
Damn my constant tardiness.
Kirk, please, what can we do right now?|The alarm is just so loud.
That's my fault, too.
|I asked Jimmy to crank it up.
He did.
If you have an alarm, you need it loud.
You don't want|a knife-wielding gunman at your throat and the neighbors are going, like: "Is that a fan?|Did I leave the water running?" You want them to know,|hey, that's an alarm.
Your imaginary attacker|has a knife and a gun? And a really dirty tank top.
So, Jimmy's out of town,|but until he gets back we can- - Change the code.
|- Really? To something I know? - You can pick it.
|- You know how to do that? - Yes, I do.
|- That is perfect.
Okay, here we go.
|Just punch in a seven-number sequence.
- You got it.
|- Hey! Hi.
Did you know your phone's not working?|I've been calling you for an hour.
I had the operator check it.
|She said it's cut off.
- It was working this morning.
|- I'll be right back.
- Kirk?|- I have tape.
- You look tired.
|- Yeah, Kirk.
Right.
Listen, I got a call today.
- From?|- Michel.
A very upset Michel.
Why? Apparently, he called you,|and you never called him back.
- When did he call me?|- He said he called you in July.
- I was in Europe in July.
|- I think that he thinks we're trying to ace|him out of the Dragonfly.
- Why would he think that?|- I don't know, but he was so hysterical.
His voice got into|that high-pitched squeal he does and all I could make out was|"fire" and "abandon me.
" And something about not|receiving a thank-you card - for the Statue of Liberty.
|- That is crazy.
He knows we always intended|to take him with us.
- I mean, we love Michel, right?|- Right.
- He's the best concierge in the world.
|- Absolutely.
A little abrasive.
- Kind of impatient.
|- But charming.
And great at what he does,|knows the community.
- Willing to go that extra mile.
|- Tiny bit obnoxious.
Makes you want to scream,|"Life's too short! " two, three times a day.
- But-|- Picture life without him.
- We do need him, right?|- Let's just go down there and talk to him.
Right.
We know where all those Calvin Klein ads|went to die.
They look like|they all have the same mother.
That must be one tired supermodel.
|Excuse me, we're- - I wouldn't talk to us, either.
|- Talk to a boy.
A boy will be nice to you.
Okay.
Hi.
Excuse me.
|We're looking for Michel Gerard.
- The corner of Mercer and Broome.
|- Excuse me? Janet Jackson's on the phone.
- No worries.
Hi.
|- Us? - Yes.
|- We're looking for Michel Gerard.
- Michel.
|- Yes, Michel- - Janet again.
|- She's very needy lately.
You have some guests at the front desk.
- No worries.
He comes like the wind.
|- Thank- - He doesn't need our thanks.
|- He has Janet, so The tickets are under the hotel's name.
You have reservations at Tamtam at 7:00.
Don't order the duck.
It will take forever and you will miss the curtain.
If you have any problems at all,|you have my pager number.
Just call me.
Goodbye.
- Look who the cat dragged in.
|- Hi, Michel.
We've missed you.
Yes? I have missed you, too.
This place is wonderful.
You look so important,|walking around, talking to yourself but you're not really talking to yourself.
You're actually talking to someone else|in a headset with your headset.
- How are you?|- Me? I am wonderful, and yourselves? We're great and we're breaking ground|on the inn on Monday.
Yes.
Is that still happening? - It is still happening.
|- That's lovely.
There's a small charge|for the use of the Internet.
All instructions are in the minibar.
|I'm so pleased.
I know you're a little upset with me.
- Upset? I don't think so.
|- I told her about the call.
- What call?|- The call you made to me yesterday.
The one where you told me|you called Lorelai and she didn't call back.
- I make so many calls.
|- The one where you cried.
Are you sure it wasn't another Michel? You called me.
You kept me on the phone|for over an hour.
I missed the beginning of|Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
- When I got back, they were all gay.
|- It doesn't matter.
If there was any misunderstanding about wanting you to come with us|to the Dragonfly, we're sorry.
- I'm not.
|- Very sweet of you to say.
Thank you.
Unless you don't want to come with us.
|I mean, this place is very impressive and I would understand|if you didn't want to leave.
Yes, this place is impressive, isn't it? I mean, the uniform alone,|it's like working in your jammies.
And these headsets,|are they not fabulous? Especially when, for example,|you're in the bathroom a place one would|normally choose to be alone then suddenly, bang, someone is|yakking in your ear.
- How delightful.
You can never get lonely.
|- I suppose not.
And the people who work here?|A joy: so young, so talented.
Some of them are actors|in ambitious off-Broadway revues.
They play cockroaches and derelicts and do Shakespeare|dressed like punk rockers.
It gives me chills just thinking about it.
Yes, extra towels are|complimentary, Matthew and stop asking me|who the hottie I'm talking to is.
I tell you what.
I'll think about it|and get back to you, okay? - Nice to have you aboard, Michel.
|- I'm busy.
Go.
Thank God.
Matthew, what? So, he invited us to his wedding.
- And we're having beef.
|- But what was his body language like? Tall.
No, I mean, did he squirm|or back away when he invited you or was he all darty-eyed? Not much squirming, no backing away,|but there was a little bit of darty-eye.
- So he was nervous?|- We were both nervous.
We didn't expect to run into each other,|and I think he invited us 'cause he felt like he had to be nice.
- That does sound like Dean.
|- So, do we go? I can't decide this.
He's your ex-boyfriend.
- It seems weird that we go.
|- Then we don't go.
But if we don't go it may look like we're trying|to make a statement.
- Then we go.
|- If I had just stayed at Lane's - for two more minutes|- Yeah, fate.
Yes, it is fate.
Do we ignore fate? Do you have any|important papers due soon? - Why?|- In case.
- Fate's gonna flunk me?|- It's always a possibility.
- Then we are going.
|- Going where? Dean's wedding.
Fate's making us.
I hope fate will cough up|$40 for a salad spinner for him.
Please.
There is no fate.
What do you mean there is no fate?|Of course there is fate.
There is no fate.
There is no destiny.
|There is no luck.
Astrology is ridiculous.
Tarot cards tell you nothing.
|You cannot read a palm.
Tea leaves make tea and nothing else.
Jim Morrison is not hanging out with|Elvis.
The Kennedys did not kill Marilyn.
- I knew you were gonna say that.
|- I came over here.
My fault.
I read your mind.
|It spoke to me.
We're psychic.
- Enjoy the fries.
|- Where does this leave us? I think that Dean's gonna expect us to go,|and it is his day.
I don't want him|to feel like I don't care about him.
- I know.
|- I just want him to be happy.
Okay, we'll get him a salad spinner|first thing tomorrow morning.
Thank you.
There you are.
Honey, I've got your mail.
- Great.
|- I'm exhausted.
I've been looking all over town for you.
You could have left me a message.
|I would have picked it up.
There was something marked "Urgent"|in there and I just wanted to make sure you got it.
Thank you.
All right, I'm leaving.
|I'm gonna kill that mail carrier.
I don't care if he doesn't have a tongue.
Our new mail carrier|doesn't have a tongue? - You've got to be kidding me.
|- That's what Patty said.
No, Taylor has sent me|a cease-and-desist order on the inn.
"Dear Lorelai Gilmore,|it has come to the attention "of the Historical Preservation Society "that you and Miss Sookie St.
James "intend to begin construction|on the Dragonfly Inn.
"Any proposed renovations|must be discussed and approved "by the Stars Hollow Historical|Preservation Society.
"We must therefore ask|that all work halt "until this procedure has been followed.
"Thank you, and have a historical day.
" - Is he kidding?|- What are you gonna do? - I'm going to talk to him.
|- Cool.
Don't say "cool.
"|It's gonna be very pleasant.
You said you were gonna talk to Taylor.
I own my own business now.
I'm gonna have to deal|with tiny men like Taylor all the time.
You can't go yelling at people,|no matter how historical they might be.
Bummer.
You have to learn to separate|the personal from the business.
Okay.
Remember in "The Godfather,"|Michael telling Sonny how he was gonna kill Tattaglia|and Captain McCluskey in that Italian restaurant? He lays out the whole thing|very calmly, very unemotionally 'cause that's what you do in business.
Yeah, but then he went|and shot two guys in the head.
I wasn't describing that scene.
But if you know you already like lime then you're not sampling, you're savoring,|and that's just gluttonous.
Hi, Taylor.
Hello there, Lorelai.
|Rory, what can I get for you? Gosh, look at all the choices.
|Really hard to pick.
I think I'll try a scoop|of Butter Brickle Crunch.
- Rory?|- I'll try the Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate.
Coming right up.
While I have you here,|I received this letter in the mail and I'm having a blonde day.
|I wonder if you could explain it to me.
It says you have to get approval before you can start|construction on the inn.
That's what I thought it said.
I have to tell you I'm a little concerned because we have a construction crew|coming Monday, so, yikes.
The Dragonfly is a historical building,|Lorelai.
Yeah, but the whole town|is a historical building.
George Washington ate, slept,|or blew his nose all over the damn place.
He only blew his nose in the park.
|You've read the sign.
That inn needs love.
It's falling down.
We have no intention|of ruining its historical aspect.
- We'd just like some running water.
|- Running water was not always historical.
You're telling me|I can't put in running water? My God, this is incredible.
It's called|Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate but it's seriously|chocolate, chocolate, chocolatey.
- Sorry.
|- I'm just telling you there are rules and they have to be followed.
Fine.
What do I have to do to get|the Historical Preservation Society's stamp of approval? - A formal presentation is necessary.
|- When? Any town function or gathering|is open to a presentation, Lorelai.
- Okay, so, like, the town meeting tonight?|- If you like.
- The town meeting it is.
|- Now, don't look sad.
I went through this with my place, too.
Of course, I knew the rules,|so I didn't get the embarrassing letter.
Right, okay, great.
|We'll see you later, Taylor.
- Yes?|- That'll be $3.
50 for the ice cream.
And worth every penny, let me tell you.
|Sorry, but this is really good.
So, any additional landscaping|to the town square will be paid for directly|from the town park funds and town park funds only.
All righty.
- Long one tonight.
|- Astonishingly long.
- We've got to be next, right?|- We've got to be.
Michel, are you okay over there? He says the guy next to him|has unforgivable B.
O.
Michel, you're French.
|How can you even tell? - Could we have a little quiet, please?|- Sorry, we're just waiting here very patiently, as you can see,|all ready and everything.
Yes, the next item, people is a wonderful feather|in Stars Hollow's cap.
One of our very own,|fourth-grader Donny Pass was named a runner-up in the Connecticut state|story-writing contest for his work entitled|The Happiest Doughnut.
I think I'm going to give birth|out of boredom.
Donny's mom is here tonight.
|Let's give her a big hand.
- I almost think he's doing this on purpose.
|- Almost? Bordering on "pretty damn sure.
" I won't spoil the plot|of "The Happiest Doughnut" for you, folks.
Except to say it's funny|and a little sad and truly inspiring.
But a caveat for all you parents the dunking scene may be too intense|for preschool-aged children.
How can a stupid doughnut be happy? See, he's got you curious.
|That's the genius of Donny Pass.
I've got a bunch of your mail.
Here.
I've got some of yours,|too, and some of Al's.
- Will you pass this back to him for me?|- Yeah.
If you hand this up to Andrew.
Can do.
I can't smell anything.
I'm breathing it all in|so it's not reaching you.
- Thanks for taking that grenade for me.
|- People, could we have some order here? Gypsy,|the letter from my girlfriend's open.
Yeah.
Sorry, Andrew.
|It must have fallen open accidentally.
You read my private letter.
There's nothing private in that letter,|except for the medical stuff.
Taylor, I got your "Pennysaver"|and your girlie magazines.
Those are lifestyle magazines.
People, this meeting has degenerated|into our usual weekly anarchy.
- I say we adjourn.
See you next week.
|- Taylor! Everyone pick up a free copy of|"The Happiest Doughnut" on your way out.
We were supposed to make|our presentation about the Dragonfly.
Yes, you're bringing this up kind of late.
- We've been sitting here.
|- It won't take long.
It was your idea.
You suggested this.
Okay.
People, your children and elderly are going to have to wait a while|for you to get home because Lorelai Gilmore and her associate|want to discuss some proposed changes to a beloved town structure.
Thank you.
|Let's go, Sookie, Augustus Gloop.
Knock them dead.
Guys, I know we've been here forever but I very quickly want to tell|you what we have in mind for this beautiful Dragonfly property.
- Historic Dragonfly property.
|- That goes without saying.
I don't think you should|try to hide the fact it's historic.
- I'm not hiding anything.
|- Proceed, please.
Okay, we're very excited- How many guest rooms|will this establishment have? Ten.
Yeah, 10.
Anyway,|the property's been unoccupied for- - Parking? How many parking spaces?|- Eighteen.
Something wrong|with the parking, Taylor? Two people to a room,|each with their own car that's 20 cars.
|You don't have enough parking.
Some people will be|driving there together, in one car.
- So, you have a crystal ball, do you?|- That's just common sense.
If you have a crystal ball|I would like to borrow it to take to the racetrack.
No, I don't have a crystal ball but if the parking's not enough,|we can always add more.
Easy.
- "Pave paradise and put up a parking lot.
"|- Not what we're saying.
I heard you're planning to serve alcohol.
|Is this true? There will be a restaurant.
Wine, cocktails,|give the people what they want.
So it'll be a party spot?|Catering to that crowd hip-hoppers, the Manson family? It's a little country inn.
A perfect secluded spot|for murderers to revel in impropriety.
Have you noticed?|This is not going very well.
Taylor, everyone,|there will be millions of questions some of them even legitimate,|but the bottom line is: You know me.
I've been a part of this town for Look how big my daughter is.
|For that long.
Opening this inn has been a dream of mine|and of Sookie's for most of that time.
Along with Michel,|we plan to make this community as proud of the historic Dragonfly Inn as you were when this same team was running|the Independence Inn.
You mean the place|that burned down on your watch? Can I slap him? Now, this will also help|our local economy because- Because we plan to employ|Sorry.
We plan to employ - This call is coming from the house.
|- Our house? - It's flashing our number.
|- But we're here.
I know.
That's the weird part.
Sookie, keep it going in here.
|I'll be just a quick second.
Okay, if you have any questions Yes, about the Dragonfly or deodorant The places to buy it, how to apply it,|that sort of thing.
Hello? I responded to activation of an alarm|at your residence and I apprehended a prowler in the garage.
- You did?|- Yes, Ma'am.
Female, approximately 18 years old,|Korean.
- Kirk, that's Lane.
You know Lane.
|- I thought I knew Lane but now I think she's in some kind of gang.
- Lorelai, help.
|- Their front is some sort of musical group.
They are a musical group, Kirk.
|Honey, go sort it out.
Got it.
Rory's on her way over.
|Brown hair, blue eyes about 5'6".
Don't cuff her.
- Ten-four.
|- Okay.
- We failed you.
|- He is a very unpleasant man.
What happened? The second you walked out the door Taylor adjourned the meeting|over our objections.
- Where'd he go?|- He was the first one out the door.
Unbelievable.
You can run, but you can't hide.
This is cute.
"The Happy Doughnut.
" Did we have a little|misunderstanding back there? Please don't sneak up on me like that.
- I almost blew my emergency whistle.
|- We weren't done.
- I thought we were.
|- No we weren't.
What more was there to say? Nothing was decided.
|You said to explain what you're doing then we can start our work.
You can't do that|until after the walk-through.
I'm in heels.
Do you mind?|What walk-through? I and other members of|the Historical Preservation Society need to examine the property in person.
You didn't think we'd make a decision based on a little chat.
- I mentioned a walk-through.
|- I don't think you did.
- I'm mentioning it now.
|- When's the walk-through? I'd have to check|with the other society members set something up in the next month or so.
I have workmen coming Monday,|Taylor, the day after tomorrow.
- Dear.
That's cutting it pretty close.
|- Let's do it tomorrow, please.
- Tomorrow's Sunday.
|- Yes.
It would have to be before church.
- Okay, so midmorning?|-6:00? Or another day.
|I could take it up with the society.
No, 6:00 is fine.
6:00 sharp.
- See you then.
|- Bright and early.
- Good night.
|- Good night.
Thanks.
That is our Stars Hollow High fight song.
Could have sworn it was Mozart.
- What is this, guys?|- Pit stop! - Bachelor party phase one is over.
|- Our boy Dean here is tying the knot.
Look, I was just closing up.
- Luke!|- Dean! - That's funny.
|- I wasn't even trying.
We need to refuel for phase two.
|It won't take long.
You wouldn't turn away a man|on his wedding day, would you? It's not your wedding day yet.
That's what I keep telling him.
|It's your last day of freedom.
- We should get strippers, right?|- And cake.
My name's Luke, too.
|We should start a club.
That would be swell.
Look, why don't you go|sit down over there? - I'll make some coffee.
|- Tomorrow is the big day, man, big day.
- You're tipping there, Dean.
Watch him.
|- I got him.
We really appreciate this, sir.
- Stop calling me that.
|- He's a good guy, really.
So, what was phase one? A case of beer in the JC Penney parking lot|then batting cages and laser tag.
I've decided that I really like beer.
- I'm the designated driver.
|- Good man.
- I'm in the Navy now, you know.
|- Uniform tipped me off.
My older cousins did two-year stints.
It paid for their college, so I joined up.
Of course, we weren't|fighting international skirmishes on two or three dangerous fronts|like we are now.
What are you doing? - Sugar football.
|- Don't.
Come on, guys.
|Respect the establishment.
- They're still kids.
|- I got a better idea, guys.
How about I whip up|some pancakes real fast help soak up whatever it is you drank? Sounds good.
|We'll need energy for phase two.
Strippers, right? We got to get strippers.
How much do you give a stripper? - That depends on what she does.
|- Are they really prostitutes? 'Cause I'd feel bad if they were prostitutes.
Guys, I got to go in the back|for a couple seconds.
Don't drink any more.
Don't play Jets.
Don't jump on the furniture.
|Just sit still, okay? - And do what?|- I don't know.
Make up a dirty version of the fight song.
- Yeah!|- Great idea! Rory.
- What did he say?|- He is so toasted.
- Rory.
|- Did he say what I think he said? Guys, you know what I think?|I think it's real late and that maybe you ought|to cancel phase two.
- No way.
|- Hear him out, fellas.
Think about it, guys,|how you gonna beat laser tag? Is Dean sick? He just needs his rest.
Why don't you|march your friends out of here? I'll take care of the groom,|and he'll see you all tomorrow.
He's right, guys.
Let's saddle up.
- Aren't we getting pancakes?|- I'm not feeling good.
Come on, big guy.
Try to walk.
Here we are.
Okay.
She's smart, man.
|You know, she's so smart.
I know, I know.
- She could probably fix the world.
|- Right.
She could team up with Kyle.
|Her brains, his brawn.
- No, not Kyle.
Rory.
|- Almost there.
She's the one, you know? Come on, Dean,|just slide down there, stop talking.
And the hair, pretty hair.
|She has the prettiest hair, and the head.
- What is that?|- Just your shoes.
I miss her.
Why didn't she love me? Scrubbing shower grout|with a toothbrush.
Sure.
Flossing with that really, really fine floss|that cuts between your teeth like a razor.
- Staring into the sun.
|- Till you're blind.
- I feel very ugly this morning.
|- Join the crowd.
That unpleasant man|and his cohorts in there? And have been for about|30 freaking minutes.
Getting brain freeze|from eating ice cream.
What are you doing? We're listing all the things|we'd rather be doing than this.
- What a mug.
It's like he sucked a lemon.
|- I've really grown to hate him.
Nice? So much potential.
- Yeah.
|- It needs a lot of TLC.
And we've got an abundance of it, Taylor.
|Patty, please, help.
He's killing me here,|and you've got pull with him.
Honey, I got my own|remodeling to do on my studio that Taylor has to approve.
I'm saving my pull for me.
Can I have just a little teeny,|tiny bit of your pull, please? He's gonna see us talking.
- Lorelai, consultation, please.
|- Okay.
- This porch is falling apart.
|- I know.
- It's got live termites.
|- Big, fat ones.
- It's a safety hazard.
|- It's the first thing to go.
To go? This porch can't go.
- You just said it's falling apart.
|- I didn't tell you to tear it down.
It's historical.
It has to stay.
The porch is not historical.
|It was added in 1980.
- So?|- It's a 23-year-old porch.
Unless you think Kate Hudson|is historical, it's not historical.
Not now, but how do you think we get|historical 200-year-old structures if we tear them down|when they're just 23? It's rotting away.
Which means that your|guests can't walk on it.
So they should hover over it? No, you could build a bridge over it,|using appropriate materials.
Or you could build a transparent|Lucite porch over this porch so people could walk on the Lucite porch and see the old porch|underneath the new porch.
Build a clear plastic porch|over the rotting wood porch? With the proper permits,|and those are hard to come by.
- That's it.
|- Lorelai, watch it.
I've got church later.
What did I do to make you torture me? I don't know what you're talking about.
The hoops, the jumping|and the fire and the hoops.
It's just business, Lorelai.
I pay to shop in your store.
|I eat your banana splits.
I've never physically hurt you except for that one spit wad|in the one town meeting but I didn't mean for it to hit your eye,|and I apologize so put me out of my misery and tell me what I need to|make this happen! - I want an ice-cream truck.
|- What? I want to sell ice cream off a truck.
I want to park it in front of the soda shop.
I want to ring the bell on it every day but the only place I can park it - is the space that's in front of Luke's diner.
|- So? - You have pull with Luke.
|- I guess.
Maybe.
You're friends.
|You can get him to agree to this.
- Use my pull?|- If you don't mind.
If I get Luke to agree to this,|the madness stops? - If that's what you call it.
|- Work begins.
The porch goes? All expedited, nice and neat.
- An ice-cream truck?|- An ice-cream truck.
You can go.
This has been a very successful outing.
- Back on the bus, everyone.
|- Unbelievable.
Yep.
When do you think you'll- Shortcut to Luke's.
How is she going to get over|Potter's Creek? Jump it? - Give him his ice-cream truck.
|- What? I forged a stream,|and I almost got attacked by a beaver - and I'm not leaving here till you agree.
|- To what? You don't own the street.
|You own the building.
It's a public street.
|Let him park his stupid truck.
- I'm missing something.
|- Don't change the subject.
I don't even know what the subject is.
If you let Taylor park his ice-cream truck not even in front,|but in front of part of the diner then I can start work on the inn.
|But if you don't say yes then you may not have to see|his truck parked outside but you will have to see my body|swinging from that tree because I will hang myself.
- I am waiting for your answer.
|- Sure.
"Sure" what? - He can park it there.
What do I care?|- Don't kid around.
- Your life's at stake.
I wouldn't kid around.
|- That easy? Why'd you say no|when Taylor asked you before? - He never asked me before.
|- He never asked? Not about a truck about a giant ice-cream cone|a few months back.
I said no to that.
Probably why he thought|I'd say no to the truck.
- He never asked?|- No.
But you're fine with this,|and he could have asked? It's a public street.
- And you would have said yes?|- I'd have said yes.
And I wouldn't have had|to go through all this? - Probably not.
|- You know what? I've learned something|very valuable here today.
Come on in.
Sit down there.
|Take a load off.
- Very valuable.
|- Good.
I've had a business epiphany.
It's like I'm Bud Fox, saying,|"Thanks for the lesson, Mr.
Gekko.
" This will pass, folks.
The Lorelai you knew is dead.
|Remember her? Eager to please, fresh of face? She thought that success in business|meant working hard applying yourself,|and respecting your coworkers.
And she preached that to others.
|Little child! You should probably get some rest.
It's about scratching backs,|my friend, and kissing things - I won't be graphic.
|- It is Sunday morning.
It's dirty.
That's what business is.
It's smoke-filled back rooms|with exposed pipes and shady players chewing on fat cigars|and twirling their dirty mustaches.
And when you go into those rooms,|you can't be a milquetoast muppet.
You have to have pointy teeth|and jaws that snap.
The meek shall not inherit the earth! - Thanks for the perspective.
|- Do you have any coffee? - I'm not giving you coffee.
|- I don't have time for coffee.
I got to go find Taylor and close this deal.
|You think he's back at the store? Or having his dirty mustache cleaned.
- You're good with the truck?|- I'm good with the truck.
Bless you.
I'll be right with you, folks.
So, you're up.
Yeah.
I'm up.
It took me a minute or two|to figure out where I am, but That's all right.
You've never been here.
Yeah, it's not that I remember.
|I just kind of looked out the window,|and that's how I could tell.
Good.
Smart.
Little concoction of mine.
|It'll help with the hangover.
Guess I had a beer or two|too many last night.
Yeah, it happens.
Hope the guys didn't bug you too much.
- No, they were fine.
|- Good.
So, you're all dressed there? Yeah, you know, big day, getting married.
Getting married.
I'm due in the church in about an hour.
Dean- - And I still got to pick up my tux.
|- Yeah, right.
Thanks for everything, Luke.
Yeah, sure.
Good luck.
So, a total strikeout? Total.
And, you know, at first,|I felt bad for them so lacking in talent, yet so clueless.
|Then I just felt bad for their guitars.
Where are all the good young musicians|these days? My ears wanted to fly off my head.
I'm going to the music store|to look at things I can't afford.
Coming? - I have to go get ready for this.
|- Right.
Tell me how it goes.
- I will.
Hey, Luke.
|- Hey.
- Rory, where's your mom?|- Around somewhere.
Why? I thought I'd find her at Doose's.
- Did she go back to the inn?|- She was going back to the inn then she was buying|a wedding present for Dean.
She hates it when people send gifts later.
Then, depending on the time I was either gonna meet her back at home|or at the church.
- She have her cell on her?|- I think it's dead.
What's going on? - Or a pager or something?|- Is something wrong? I just need to check something with her.
We can stop by after the wedding.
Don't go to the wedding.
|Don't go to Dean's wedding.
- Why?|- I just Don't go.
- Trust me.
|- Okay.
- It'd just be better this way.
|- Okay.
- So, you're not going?|- I guess not.
Okay, good.
I'll see you guys later.
- Yeah, Luke, I'll see you later.
|- Okay.
- Lorelai, do you have a minute?|- Sure, Kirk.
- We've had a successful disconnection.
|- No more alarm? - No more alarm.
|- Fantastic.
The roofer will be out tomorrow.
|The repair should take a day.
- I'm not gonna inquire about that now.
|- It's all taken care of.
I want to apologize for any inconvenience.
It was no big deal.
I have this strong sense of chivalry|when it comes to women living alone.
That's very nice.
My family tree dates back|to a 12th-century knight.
As a kid I thought that meant|we were related to Ted Knight.
I wrote him a lot of letters.
|He never responded.
- That's cute, though.
|- I just want you to feel safe.
You really do, don't you, Kirk? So, I hope you don't mind|my watching out for you.
Not at all.
Thank you.
I'll see you around.
See you.
I think I found the perfect|wedding present for Dean.
- Sweet, not personal, classy, yet cheap.
|- We're not going.
What? Luke was looking for you and ran into me,|and he was all nervous and then he finally just said|we shouldn't go.
- What does that mean?|- It means we shouldn't go.
- Did he give a reason?|- Not really.
- I'll go talk to him.
|- No, he seemed really serious.
If you saw him, you'd feel the same way.
- He was kind of upset.
|- About Dean's wedding? - Yeah.
|- So, we're not going? - I think it's better that we don't.
|- Okay.
Mystery, though.
Kind of.
You've got your|"nothing to do" weekend back.
Yeah, got that back.
Mom, Kirk's following us|in a little clowny car.
- He's watching out for us.
|- Okay.
Ready? No, no, it's got to look|like we're actually demolishing the porch.
We're gonna do pretend swings.
Which would've been easier|if we had pretend sledgehammers.
Why do they make these so heavy? Even without the swing,|this is a good picture of the two of you about to record|an important moment for the two of you.
- Michel-|- I would love a copy of this for my mantel.
- Such a nice moment.
|- You have to be in the picture, too, Michel.
- Me? I don't know.
All right.
|- That thing have a timer on it? It's set.
I framed the shot.
Grab your hammer and smile.
- One more for safety?|- Okay.
What? Just sometimes, it hits me.
|This place had a long history before us has a long future after us.
I keep thinking it's a part of our lives,|but, really, it's the reverse.
For a little while, I don't know it's like we're a part of its life.
Yeah.
English
|- We don't have an alarm.
Then we have really angry rats.
- Did you cut your hair?|- I just trimmed it.
You didn't tell me|you were cutting your hair.
It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
A spur-of-the-moment "Let's not tell|my mother I'm pulling a G.
I.
Jane"? Are we seriously gonna have|this conversation now during the air raid? - You're right.
Come on.
|- What are we doing? I figured out that there is|a motion detector and if you stand over here,|it can't see you and it calms down.
- Great, so what now?|- We wait.
Why didn't you tell me you|were getting your hair cut? - It's just a trim.
|- To the Braille Institute, it's just a trim.
- Do you like it?|- Will you put it back if I don't? - Yes, I like it.
|- Thank you.
Thank God.
- Feels good when it's over.
|- This is crazy.
When did we get an alarm? Apparently, Kirk has recently joined the|Stars Hollow Security Company.
No.
And now that I'm|the pretty spinster living all alone he's concerned for my safety.
Did he tell you all this? You think I labeled myself|"the pretty spinster"? - What did you say?|- I haven't talked to him face-to-face.
I come home to this and there was|a note and his card and his gun.
And then when I called|the alarm-response center to complain about the alarm,|no one answered.
I had to leave a message with Meg.
|She sweeps up.
I can't even believe there's a|security company in Stars Hollow.
- Nothing ever happens here.
|- That's not true.
Plenty happens here.
- Like what?|- Like, people now break into your houses - and install alarm systems.
|- I heard about that.
- We have a new mail carrier.
|- We do? If you want your mail,|you have to go see Miss Patty.
- Why?|- 'Cause that's where he brings it.
He brings Babette's mail to Andrew,|Norma's mail to the deli and Taylor still hasn't found his,|which, I admit, is fun.
I rescind my previous statement.
|This place is hopping.
- So, did you eat yet?|- Nope.
I thought I'd let you feed me.
Sure.
I can feed you but I can't know|if you're getting your hair cut.
I'll never do anything again|without telling you.
Happy? I don't know.
I'm finding|this guilt thing rather satisfying.
No, where are you going?|Why did you do that? - I was gonna get my laundry!|- You made it mad! - I didn't mean to!|- Back in the corner! Back in the corner! No place like home! Yeah.
- Mom?|- Follow the Post-its.
Does our life seem at all ridiculous to you? I spent all morning|carefully tracking that motion detector.
What an excellent use of your time.
We're good as long as|we stay on the path.
- So I should follow the Yellow Stick Road?|- We'll be here all week.
Try the veal.
- Stop.
|- What? - Read.
|- Crouch down and hop.
Come on.
The motion-detector beam|at the top of the staircase dips very low over there.
You seriously want me|to crouch down and hop? Like a little hunchbacked bunny.
You know, I had decided|that if I ever went to therapy I was gonna leave you out of it, but now- Okay, you can stand up.
Did you at least call|the stupid security company again? Yes.
Meg sends her love.
Don't worry,|I'll stop by on my way to the inn.
What are your plans today,|Persis Khambatta? Today, I'm going to do nothing but hang out in town, read, veg drink coffee,|and have the perfect Stars Hollow day.
Look out.
I get to go over to the inn|and hear a contractor laugh at me every time I say,|"That won't cost too much more, right?" - Enjoy.
|- Late lunch at Luke's? You're on.
So which way do I go? Just follow the Post-its.
But they're going|in two different directions.
- They are?|- Look.
I must have kicked some|out of the way by accident.
- Which one do I take?|- Which one looks more intentional? - No Post-it path looks intentional.
|- I'm drawing a complete blank.
- You seriously don't remember?|- Sorry.
How are we supposed|to get out of our house? I hate Kirk.
- What's going on?|- I'm just setting things up for tomorrow.
- Tomorrow-|- Heads up! - What's-|- I think you may need to move.
Yeah, I kind of got that.
|Excuse me.
What's tomorrow? Tons of tulle|so that everything looks like frosting.
She's our only daughter.
Frost the town.
Now, where should we put the poster?|I want to make sure everybody sees it.
- What about next to the cake?|- Yes, next to the cake.
I'm so proud of her.
- Lane?|- Rory.
Have you heard of a phone?|As my friend it is your responsibility to use it to call me and tell me|my ex-boyfriend's wedding is on Sunday - so I'm not accidentally in it.
|- What? I was sitting out in the gazebo, reading and this guy almost brains me|with a stack of tablecloths.
That's right.
They're having the reception|in the town square.
Yes, and Lindsay was out there,|holding a giant picture of her with Dean.
- Did she see you?|- I don't think so.
- I do a good idiot run when I need to.
|- I'm sorry.
I meant to tell you.
I didn't know|you were coming home this weekend.
It totally slipped my mind.
|Things have been so crazy.
I just figured I'd tell you when we talked,|then we didn't.
I'm sorry.
Can you hold on for a sec? - Not cool, Lane.
|- I'm sorry, guys.
- Fourth time today.
|- I thought Rory was my mom.
- The resemblance is uncanny.
|- You should get your mom a bell like a cat.
What's going on? We're having a band meeting.
|We need to figure out a guitarist.
I think I got a splinter.
A splinter can get into your bloodstream - go straight to your heart, and kill you.
|- Why'd you tell me that? Whatever, dude.
This is lame.
|I'm gonna bail.
- Zack, come on.
|- We need to find a guitarist.
Right.
We have come too far|to let the band fall apart - just because Dave-|- Hey! - Do not say the "D" word, Lane.
|- But- Don't.
Dave is dead to me.
"Comprendo?" Dead.
Cover the mirror, rip a shirt.
|That guy doesn't exist.
- He just went to college, Zack.
|- He did not just go to college.
He walked out on his art, man.
|He walked out on his sound.
Do you think a sound is so easy to find?|Did you ever see that Glenn Miller movie? For two hours,|Jimmy Stewart's walking around "I got to find a sound.
|I got to find a sound.
" We had a sound, and Dave|took that sound to freaking California.
You don't come back from California, man.
|It changes you.
What, did you expect him|not to go to college? No true rock 'n' roller goes to college! Mick Jagger went to the|London School of Economics.
- What?|- Yeah.
And Dexter Holland of The Offspring|got his PhD in molecular biology at USC.
Greg Ginn of Black Flag|graduated from UCLA.
The guy from Bad Religion|got his master's in geology from UCLA.
And he's working on his PhD in evolutionary biology at Cornell.
Lane, she's your friend.
I'm sorry.
I'm going.
I'll call you later.
- Are you mad?|- No, I'm not.
I promise.
I'm just I was just a little surprised.
|I mean, Dean's wedding - I know.
|- But it's okay.
It just means I have to be more careful about where I go this weekend.
That's all.
I'll see you tomorrow.
|We're using the garage.
Guitar auditions.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Shut up.
Weezer did not go to Harvard.
- Not the whole band, just the lead-|- Get away from me! I mean it.
- Bye.
|- Bye.
- Hi.
|- Hi.
Were you- - I was at Lane's.
|- Right, Lane's.
So, you're home this weekend? Yeah, I ran out of clean clothes|and quarters so How are things? - Good.
You?|- Good.
- You like Yale?|- I love Yale.
And Connecticut State? - It's good.
|- Good.
I'm glad it's good.
Not that I would have had any recourse|if it wasn't but this makes my lack of recourse|a lot easier to deal with.
- So, I see you've taken over the town.
|- Yeah, Lindsay thought - She likes the gazebo, and-|- It's her wedding.
- It is her wedding.
|- And your wedding.
It's your wedding, too.
Yes, it is.
It's my wedding, too.
It's nice.
It's pretty.
It looks like heaven|or a Victoria's Secret commercial which, to some people,|is basically the same thing.
- Didn't know you'd be home this weekend.
|- It was just a spur-of-the-moment thing.
Because if I had known,|I would have, you know, invited you.
It's- I didn't want you to think|I was just not inviting you.
- No, I didn't think that.
|- I just figured you'd be at school.
- I just didn't know.
|- I know you didn't.
- I didn't want you to think-|- No, I don't think.
I go to Yale now.
They think for you.
But, since you are here, come.
- Come?|- Come to my wedding.
- Dean.
|- You and Lorelai, I want you to.
- Chicken or beef?|- What? Wait, beef.
Of course beef.
I mean, the two of you are definitely beef.
I mean,|not like you resemble beef or anything.
- You know, you don't even have to-|- Okay, so, noon at the church.
I'll be the one in the tux.
Don't worry, we didn't write our own vows|and no one's singing opera.
- I know you think that's lame.
|- No, it's a wedding.
It's supposed to be operatic.
Okay, so, I better get over there.
|Lindsay's expecting me.
- So, I'll just see you two tomorrow.
|- But - Now?|- Nothing.
- What about now?|- No, nothing.
Okay.
- Now?|- Nothing.
- Kirk, what's supposed to happen?|- What? I don't know what I'm|supposed to be looking for.
- Kirk?|- I'm not sure.
Kirk, please come downstairs.
Are you going to hurt me? I swear,|they told me it would be self-explanatory.
I just had to get in the main box and, in seconds, this would be disabled.
They didn't tell me I needed a key or that, if I didn't have a key,|I would be mildly electrocuted and then, after all that,|when I got in the box there's nothing self-explanatory about it.
- I was trying to do a nice thing.
|- I know.
Jimmy said he would install it for me,|because I do not have those skills yet.
- The class was full when I got there.
|- That's okay.
Damn my constant tardiness.
Kirk, please, what can we do right now?|The alarm is just so loud.
That's my fault, too.
|I asked Jimmy to crank it up.
He did.
If you have an alarm, you need it loud.
You don't want|a knife-wielding gunman at your throat and the neighbors are going, like: "Is that a fan?|Did I leave the water running?" You want them to know,|hey, that's an alarm.
Your imaginary attacker|has a knife and a gun? And a really dirty tank top.
So, Jimmy's out of town,|but until he gets back we can- - Change the code.
|- Really? To something I know? - You can pick it.
|- You know how to do that? - Yes, I do.
|- That is perfect.
Okay, here we go.
|Just punch in a seven-number sequence.
- You got it.
|- Hey! Hi.
Did you know your phone's not working?|I've been calling you for an hour.
I had the operator check it.
|She said it's cut off.
- It was working this morning.
|- I'll be right back.
- Kirk?|- I have tape.
- You look tired.
|- Yeah, Kirk.
Right.
Listen, I got a call today.
- From?|- Michel.
A very upset Michel.
Why? Apparently, he called you,|and you never called him back.
- When did he call me?|- He said he called you in July.
- I was in Europe in July.
|- I think that he thinks we're trying to ace|him out of the Dragonfly.
- Why would he think that?|- I don't know, but he was so hysterical.
His voice got into|that high-pitched squeal he does and all I could make out was|"fire" and "abandon me.
" And something about not|receiving a thank-you card - for the Statue of Liberty.
|- That is crazy.
He knows we always intended|to take him with us.
- I mean, we love Michel, right?|- Right.
- He's the best concierge in the world.
|- Absolutely.
A little abrasive.
- Kind of impatient.
|- But charming.
And great at what he does,|knows the community.
- Willing to go that extra mile.
|- Tiny bit obnoxious.
Makes you want to scream,|"Life's too short! " two, three times a day.
- But-|- Picture life without him.
- We do need him, right?|- Let's just go down there and talk to him.
Right.
We know where all those Calvin Klein ads|went to die.
They look like|they all have the same mother.
That must be one tired supermodel.
|Excuse me, we're- - I wouldn't talk to us, either.
|- Talk to a boy.
A boy will be nice to you.
Okay.
Hi.
Excuse me.
|We're looking for Michel Gerard.
- The corner of Mercer and Broome.
|- Excuse me? Janet Jackson's on the phone.
- No worries.
Hi.
|- Us? - Yes.
|- We're looking for Michel Gerard.
- Michel.
|- Yes, Michel- - Janet again.
|- She's very needy lately.
You have some guests at the front desk.
- No worries.
He comes like the wind.
|- Thank- - He doesn't need our thanks.
|- He has Janet, so The tickets are under the hotel's name.
You have reservations at Tamtam at 7:00.
Don't order the duck.
It will take forever and you will miss the curtain.
If you have any problems at all,|you have my pager number.
Just call me.
Goodbye.
- Look who the cat dragged in.
|- Hi, Michel.
We've missed you.
Yes? I have missed you, too.
This place is wonderful.
You look so important,|walking around, talking to yourself but you're not really talking to yourself.
You're actually talking to someone else|in a headset with your headset.
- How are you?|- Me? I am wonderful, and yourselves? We're great and we're breaking ground|on the inn on Monday.
Yes.
Is that still happening? - It is still happening.
|- That's lovely.
There's a small charge|for the use of the Internet.
All instructions are in the minibar.
|I'm so pleased.
I know you're a little upset with me.
- Upset? I don't think so.
|- I told her about the call.
- What call?|- The call you made to me yesterday.
The one where you told me|you called Lorelai and she didn't call back.
- I make so many calls.
|- The one where you cried.
Are you sure it wasn't another Michel? You called me.
You kept me on the phone|for over an hour.
I missed the beginning of|Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
- When I got back, they were all gay.
|- It doesn't matter.
If there was any misunderstanding about wanting you to come with us|to the Dragonfly, we're sorry.
- I'm not.
|- Very sweet of you to say.
Thank you.
Unless you don't want to come with us.
|I mean, this place is very impressive and I would understand|if you didn't want to leave.
Yes, this place is impressive, isn't it? I mean, the uniform alone,|it's like working in your jammies.
And these headsets,|are they not fabulous? Especially when, for example,|you're in the bathroom a place one would|normally choose to be alone then suddenly, bang, someone is|yakking in your ear.
- How delightful.
You can never get lonely.
|- I suppose not.
And the people who work here?|A joy: so young, so talented.
Some of them are actors|in ambitious off-Broadway revues.
They play cockroaches and derelicts and do Shakespeare|dressed like punk rockers.
It gives me chills just thinking about it.
Yes, extra towels are|complimentary, Matthew and stop asking me|who the hottie I'm talking to is.
I tell you what.
I'll think about it|and get back to you, okay? - Nice to have you aboard, Michel.
|- I'm busy.
Go.
Thank God.
Matthew, what? So, he invited us to his wedding.
- And we're having beef.
|- But what was his body language like? Tall.
No, I mean, did he squirm|or back away when he invited you or was he all darty-eyed? Not much squirming, no backing away,|but there was a little bit of darty-eye.
- So he was nervous?|- We were both nervous.
We didn't expect to run into each other,|and I think he invited us 'cause he felt like he had to be nice.
- That does sound like Dean.
|- So, do we go? I can't decide this.
He's your ex-boyfriend.
- It seems weird that we go.
|- Then we don't go.
But if we don't go it may look like we're trying|to make a statement.
- Then we go.
|- If I had just stayed at Lane's - for two more minutes|- Yeah, fate.
Yes, it is fate.
Do we ignore fate? Do you have any|important papers due soon? - Why?|- In case.
- Fate's gonna flunk me?|- It's always a possibility.
- Then we are going.
|- Going where? Dean's wedding.
Fate's making us.
I hope fate will cough up|$40 for a salad spinner for him.
Please.
There is no fate.
What do you mean there is no fate?|Of course there is fate.
There is no fate.
There is no destiny.
|There is no luck.
Astrology is ridiculous.
Tarot cards tell you nothing.
|You cannot read a palm.
Tea leaves make tea and nothing else.
Jim Morrison is not hanging out with|Elvis.
The Kennedys did not kill Marilyn.
- I knew you were gonna say that.
|- I came over here.
My fault.
I read your mind.
|It spoke to me.
We're psychic.
- Enjoy the fries.
|- Where does this leave us? I think that Dean's gonna expect us to go,|and it is his day.
I don't want him|to feel like I don't care about him.
- I know.
|- I just want him to be happy.
Okay, we'll get him a salad spinner|first thing tomorrow morning.
Thank you.
There you are.
Honey, I've got your mail.
- Great.
|- I'm exhausted.
I've been looking all over town for you.
You could have left me a message.
|I would have picked it up.
There was something marked "Urgent"|in there and I just wanted to make sure you got it.
Thank you.
All right, I'm leaving.
|I'm gonna kill that mail carrier.
I don't care if he doesn't have a tongue.
Our new mail carrier|doesn't have a tongue? - You've got to be kidding me.
|- That's what Patty said.
No, Taylor has sent me|a cease-and-desist order on the inn.
"Dear Lorelai Gilmore,|it has come to the attention "of the Historical Preservation Society "that you and Miss Sookie St.
James "intend to begin construction|on the Dragonfly Inn.
"Any proposed renovations|must be discussed and approved "by the Stars Hollow Historical|Preservation Society.
"We must therefore ask|that all work halt "until this procedure has been followed.
"Thank you, and have a historical day.
" - Is he kidding?|- What are you gonna do? - I'm going to talk to him.
|- Cool.
Don't say "cool.
"|It's gonna be very pleasant.
You said you were gonna talk to Taylor.
I own my own business now.
I'm gonna have to deal|with tiny men like Taylor all the time.
You can't go yelling at people,|no matter how historical they might be.
Bummer.
You have to learn to separate|the personal from the business.
Okay.
Remember in "The Godfather,"|Michael telling Sonny how he was gonna kill Tattaglia|and Captain McCluskey in that Italian restaurant? He lays out the whole thing|very calmly, very unemotionally 'cause that's what you do in business.
Yeah, but then he went|and shot two guys in the head.
I wasn't describing that scene.
But if you know you already like lime then you're not sampling, you're savoring,|and that's just gluttonous.
Hi, Taylor.
Hello there, Lorelai.
|Rory, what can I get for you? Gosh, look at all the choices.
|Really hard to pick.
I think I'll try a scoop|of Butter Brickle Crunch.
- Rory?|- I'll try the Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate.
Coming right up.
While I have you here,|I received this letter in the mail and I'm having a blonde day.
|I wonder if you could explain it to me.
It says you have to get approval before you can start|construction on the inn.
That's what I thought it said.
I have to tell you I'm a little concerned because we have a construction crew|coming Monday, so, yikes.
The Dragonfly is a historical building,|Lorelai.
Yeah, but the whole town|is a historical building.
George Washington ate, slept,|or blew his nose all over the damn place.
He only blew his nose in the park.
|You've read the sign.
That inn needs love.
It's falling down.
We have no intention|of ruining its historical aspect.
- We'd just like some running water.
|- Running water was not always historical.
You're telling me|I can't put in running water? My God, this is incredible.
It's called|Chocolate Chocolate Chocolate but it's seriously|chocolate, chocolate, chocolatey.
- Sorry.
|- I'm just telling you there are rules and they have to be followed.
Fine.
What do I have to do to get|the Historical Preservation Society's stamp of approval? - A formal presentation is necessary.
|- When? Any town function or gathering|is open to a presentation, Lorelai.
- Okay, so, like, the town meeting tonight?|- If you like.
- The town meeting it is.
|- Now, don't look sad.
I went through this with my place, too.
Of course, I knew the rules,|so I didn't get the embarrassing letter.
Right, okay, great.
|We'll see you later, Taylor.
- Yes?|- That'll be $3.
50 for the ice cream.
And worth every penny, let me tell you.
|Sorry, but this is really good.
So, any additional landscaping|to the town square will be paid for directly|from the town park funds and town park funds only.
All righty.
- Long one tonight.
|- Astonishingly long.
- We've got to be next, right?|- We've got to be.
Michel, are you okay over there? He says the guy next to him|has unforgivable B.
O.
Michel, you're French.
|How can you even tell? - Could we have a little quiet, please?|- Sorry, we're just waiting here very patiently, as you can see,|all ready and everything.
Yes, the next item, people is a wonderful feather|in Stars Hollow's cap.
One of our very own,|fourth-grader Donny Pass was named a runner-up in the Connecticut state|story-writing contest for his work entitled|The Happiest Doughnut.
I think I'm going to give birth|out of boredom.
Donny's mom is here tonight.
|Let's give her a big hand.
- I almost think he's doing this on purpose.
|- Almost? Bordering on "pretty damn sure.
" I won't spoil the plot|of "The Happiest Doughnut" for you, folks.
Except to say it's funny|and a little sad and truly inspiring.
But a caveat for all you parents the dunking scene may be too intense|for preschool-aged children.
How can a stupid doughnut be happy? See, he's got you curious.
|That's the genius of Donny Pass.
I've got a bunch of your mail.
Here.
I've got some of yours,|too, and some of Al's.
- Will you pass this back to him for me?|- Yeah.
If you hand this up to Andrew.
Can do.
I can't smell anything.
I'm breathing it all in|so it's not reaching you.
- Thanks for taking that grenade for me.
|- People, could we have some order here? Gypsy,|the letter from my girlfriend's open.
Yeah.
Sorry, Andrew.
|It must have fallen open accidentally.
You read my private letter.
There's nothing private in that letter,|except for the medical stuff.
Taylor, I got your "Pennysaver"|and your girlie magazines.
Those are lifestyle magazines.
People, this meeting has degenerated|into our usual weekly anarchy.
- I say we adjourn.
See you next week.
|- Taylor! Everyone pick up a free copy of|"The Happiest Doughnut" on your way out.
We were supposed to make|our presentation about the Dragonfly.
Yes, you're bringing this up kind of late.
- We've been sitting here.
|- It won't take long.
It was your idea.
You suggested this.
Okay.
People, your children and elderly are going to have to wait a while|for you to get home because Lorelai Gilmore and her associate|want to discuss some proposed changes to a beloved town structure.
Thank you.
|Let's go, Sookie, Augustus Gloop.
Knock them dead.
Guys, I know we've been here forever but I very quickly want to tell|you what we have in mind for this beautiful Dragonfly property.
- Historic Dragonfly property.
|- That goes without saying.
I don't think you should|try to hide the fact it's historic.
- I'm not hiding anything.
|- Proceed, please.
Okay, we're very excited- How many guest rooms|will this establishment have? Ten.
Yeah, 10.
Anyway,|the property's been unoccupied for- - Parking? How many parking spaces?|- Eighteen.
Something wrong|with the parking, Taylor? Two people to a room,|each with their own car that's 20 cars.
|You don't have enough parking.
Some people will be|driving there together, in one car.
- So, you have a crystal ball, do you?|- That's just common sense.
If you have a crystal ball|I would like to borrow it to take to the racetrack.
No, I don't have a crystal ball but if the parking's not enough,|we can always add more.
Easy.
- "Pave paradise and put up a parking lot.
"|- Not what we're saying.
I heard you're planning to serve alcohol.
|Is this true? There will be a restaurant.
Wine, cocktails,|give the people what they want.
So it'll be a party spot?|Catering to that crowd hip-hoppers, the Manson family? It's a little country inn.
A perfect secluded spot|for murderers to revel in impropriety.
Have you noticed?|This is not going very well.
Taylor, everyone,|there will be millions of questions some of them even legitimate,|but the bottom line is: You know me.
I've been a part of this town for Look how big my daughter is.
|For that long.
Opening this inn has been a dream of mine|and of Sookie's for most of that time.
Along with Michel,|we plan to make this community as proud of the historic Dragonfly Inn as you were when this same team was running|the Independence Inn.
You mean the place|that burned down on your watch? Can I slap him? Now, this will also help|our local economy because- Because we plan to employ|Sorry.
We plan to employ - This call is coming from the house.
|- Our house? - It's flashing our number.
|- But we're here.
I know.
That's the weird part.
Sookie, keep it going in here.
|I'll be just a quick second.
Okay, if you have any questions Yes, about the Dragonfly or deodorant The places to buy it, how to apply it,|that sort of thing.
Hello? I responded to activation of an alarm|at your residence and I apprehended a prowler in the garage.
- You did?|- Yes, Ma'am.
Female, approximately 18 years old,|Korean.
- Kirk, that's Lane.
You know Lane.
|- I thought I knew Lane but now I think she's in some kind of gang.
- Lorelai, help.
|- Their front is some sort of musical group.
They are a musical group, Kirk.
|Honey, go sort it out.
Got it.
Rory's on her way over.
|Brown hair, blue eyes about 5'6".
Don't cuff her.
- Ten-four.
|- Okay.
- We failed you.
|- He is a very unpleasant man.
What happened? The second you walked out the door Taylor adjourned the meeting|over our objections.
- Where'd he go?|- He was the first one out the door.
Unbelievable.
You can run, but you can't hide.
This is cute.
"The Happy Doughnut.
" Did we have a little|misunderstanding back there? Please don't sneak up on me like that.
- I almost blew my emergency whistle.
|- We weren't done.
- I thought we were.
|- No we weren't.
What more was there to say? Nothing was decided.
|You said to explain what you're doing then we can start our work.
You can't do that|until after the walk-through.
I'm in heels.
Do you mind?|What walk-through? I and other members of|the Historical Preservation Society need to examine the property in person.
You didn't think we'd make a decision based on a little chat.
- I mentioned a walk-through.
|- I don't think you did.
- I'm mentioning it now.
|- When's the walk-through? I'd have to check|with the other society members set something up in the next month or so.
I have workmen coming Monday,|Taylor, the day after tomorrow.
- Dear.
That's cutting it pretty close.
|- Let's do it tomorrow, please.
- Tomorrow's Sunday.
|- Yes.
It would have to be before church.
- Okay, so midmorning?|-6:00? Or another day.
|I could take it up with the society.
No, 6:00 is fine.
6:00 sharp.
- See you then.
|- Bright and early.
- Good night.
|- Good night.
Thanks.
That is our Stars Hollow High fight song.
Could have sworn it was Mozart.
- What is this, guys?|- Pit stop! - Bachelor party phase one is over.
|- Our boy Dean here is tying the knot.
Look, I was just closing up.
- Luke!|- Dean! - That's funny.
|- I wasn't even trying.
We need to refuel for phase two.
|It won't take long.
You wouldn't turn away a man|on his wedding day, would you? It's not your wedding day yet.
That's what I keep telling him.
|It's your last day of freedom.
- We should get strippers, right?|- And cake.
My name's Luke, too.
|We should start a club.
That would be swell.
Look, why don't you go|sit down over there? - I'll make some coffee.
|- Tomorrow is the big day, man, big day.
- You're tipping there, Dean.
Watch him.
|- I got him.
We really appreciate this, sir.
- Stop calling me that.
|- He's a good guy, really.
So, what was phase one? A case of beer in the JC Penney parking lot|then batting cages and laser tag.
I've decided that I really like beer.
- I'm the designated driver.
|- Good man.
- I'm in the Navy now, you know.
|- Uniform tipped me off.
My older cousins did two-year stints.
It paid for their college, so I joined up.
Of course, we weren't|fighting international skirmishes on two or three dangerous fronts|like we are now.
What are you doing? - Sugar football.
|- Don't.
Come on, guys.
|Respect the establishment.
- They're still kids.
|- I got a better idea, guys.
How about I whip up|some pancakes real fast help soak up whatever it is you drank? Sounds good.
|We'll need energy for phase two.
Strippers, right? We got to get strippers.
How much do you give a stripper? - That depends on what she does.
|- Are they really prostitutes? 'Cause I'd feel bad if they were prostitutes.
Guys, I got to go in the back|for a couple seconds.
Don't drink any more.
Don't play Jets.
Don't jump on the furniture.
|Just sit still, okay? - And do what?|- I don't know.
Make up a dirty version of the fight song.
- Yeah!|- Great idea! Rory.
- What did he say?|- He is so toasted.
- Rory.
|- Did he say what I think he said? Guys, you know what I think?|I think it's real late and that maybe you ought|to cancel phase two.
- No way.
|- Hear him out, fellas.
Think about it, guys,|how you gonna beat laser tag? Is Dean sick? He just needs his rest.
Why don't you|march your friends out of here? I'll take care of the groom,|and he'll see you all tomorrow.
He's right, guys.
Let's saddle up.
- Aren't we getting pancakes?|- I'm not feeling good.
Come on, big guy.
Try to walk.
Here we are.
Okay.
She's smart, man.
|You know, she's so smart.
I know, I know.
- She could probably fix the world.
|- Right.
She could team up with Kyle.
|Her brains, his brawn.
- No, not Kyle.
Rory.
|- Almost there.
She's the one, you know? Come on, Dean,|just slide down there, stop talking.
And the hair, pretty hair.
|She has the prettiest hair, and the head.
- What is that?|- Just your shoes.
I miss her.
Why didn't she love me? Scrubbing shower grout|with a toothbrush.
Sure.
Flossing with that really, really fine floss|that cuts between your teeth like a razor.
- Staring into the sun.
|- Till you're blind.
- I feel very ugly this morning.
|- Join the crowd.
That unpleasant man|and his cohorts in there? And have been for about|30 freaking minutes.
Getting brain freeze|from eating ice cream.
What are you doing? We're listing all the things|we'd rather be doing than this.
- What a mug.
It's like he sucked a lemon.
|- I've really grown to hate him.
Nice? So much potential.
- Yeah.
|- It needs a lot of TLC.
And we've got an abundance of it, Taylor.
|Patty, please, help.
He's killing me here,|and you've got pull with him.
Honey, I got my own|remodeling to do on my studio that Taylor has to approve.
I'm saving my pull for me.
Can I have just a little teeny,|tiny bit of your pull, please? He's gonna see us talking.
- Lorelai, consultation, please.
|- Okay.
- This porch is falling apart.
|- I know.
- It's got live termites.
|- Big, fat ones.
- It's a safety hazard.
|- It's the first thing to go.
To go? This porch can't go.
- You just said it's falling apart.
|- I didn't tell you to tear it down.
It's historical.
It has to stay.
The porch is not historical.
|It was added in 1980.
- So?|- It's a 23-year-old porch.
Unless you think Kate Hudson|is historical, it's not historical.
Not now, but how do you think we get|historical 200-year-old structures if we tear them down|when they're just 23? It's rotting away.
Which means that your|guests can't walk on it.
So they should hover over it? No, you could build a bridge over it,|using appropriate materials.
Or you could build a transparent|Lucite porch over this porch so people could walk on the Lucite porch and see the old porch|underneath the new porch.
Build a clear plastic porch|over the rotting wood porch? With the proper permits,|and those are hard to come by.
- That's it.
|- Lorelai, watch it.
I've got church later.
What did I do to make you torture me? I don't know what you're talking about.
The hoops, the jumping|and the fire and the hoops.
It's just business, Lorelai.
I pay to shop in your store.
|I eat your banana splits.
I've never physically hurt you except for that one spit wad|in the one town meeting but I didn't mean for it to hit your eye,|and I apologize so put me out of my misery and tell me what I need to|make this happen! - I want an ice-cream truck.
|- What? I want to sell ice cream off a truck.
I want to park it in front of the soda shop.
I want to ring the bell on it every day but the only place I can park it - is the space that's in front of Luke's diner.
|- So? - You have pull with Luke.
|- I guess.
Maybe.
You're friends.
|You can get him to agree to this.
- Use my pull?|- If you don't mind.
If I get Luke to agree to this,|the madness stops? - If that's what you call it.
|- Work begins.
The porch goes? All expedited, nice and neat.
- An ice-cream truck?|- An ice-cream truck.
You can go.
This has been a very successful outing.
- Back on the bus, everyone.
|- Unbelievable.
Yep.
When do you think you'll- Shortcut to Luke's.
How is she going to get over|Potter's Creek? Jump it? - Give him his ice-cream truck.
|- What? I forged a stream,|and I almost got attacked by a beaver - and I'm not leaving here till you agree.
|- To what? You don't own the street.
|You own the building.
It's a public street.
|Let him park his stupid truck.
- I'm missing something.
|- Don't change the subject.
I don't even know what the subject is.
If you let Taylor park his ice-cream truck not even in front,|but in front of part of the diner then I can start work on the inn.
|But if you don't say yes then you may not have to see|his truck parked outside but you will have to see my body|swinging from that tree because I will hang myself.
- I am waiting for your answer.
|- Sure.
"Sure" what? - He can park it there.
What do I care?|- Don't kid around.
- Your life's at stake.
I wouldn't kid around.
|- That easy? Why'd you say no|when Taylor asked you before? - He never asked me before.
|- He never asked? Not about a truck about a giant ice-cream cone|a few months back.
I said no to that.
Probably why he thought|I'd say no to the truck.
- He never asked?|- No.
But you're fine with this,|and he could have asked? It's a public street.
- And you would have said yes?|- I'd have said yes.
And I wouldn't have had|to go through all this? - Probably not.
|- You know what? I've learned something|very valuable here today.
Come on in.
Sit down there.
|Take a load off.
- Very valuable.
|- Good.
I've had a business epiphany.
It's like I'm Bud Fox, saying,|"Thanks for the lesson, Mr.
Gekko.
" This will pass, folks.
The Lorelai you knew is dead.
|Remember her? Eager to please, fresh of face? She thought that success in business|meant working hard applying yourself,|and respecting your coworkers.
And she preached that to others.
|Little child! You should probably get some rest.
It's about scratching backs,|my friend, and kissing things - I won't be graphic.
|- It is Sunday morning.
It's dirty.
That's what business is.
It's smoke-filled back rooms|with exposed pipes and shady players chewing on fat cigars|and twirling their dirty mustaches.
And when you go into those rooms,|you can't be a milquetoast muppet.
You have to have pointy teeth|and jaws that snap.
The meek shall not inherit the earth! - Thanks for the perspective.
|- Do you have any coffee? - I'm not giving you coffee.
|- I don't have time for coffee.
I got to go find Taylor and close this deal.
|You think he's back at the store? Or having his dirty mustache cleaned.
- You're good with the truck?|- I'm good with the truck.
Bless you.
I'll be right with you, folks.
So, you're up.
Yeah.
I'm up.
It took me a minute or two|to figure out where I am, but That's all right.
You've never been here.
Yeah, it's not that I remember.
|I just kind of looked out the window,|and that's how I could tell.
Good.
Smart.
Little concoction of mine.
|It'll help with the hangover.
Guess I had a beer or two|too many last night.
Yeah, it happens.
Hope the guys didn't bug you too much.
- No, they were fine.
|- Good.
So, you're all dressed there? Yeah, you know, big day, getting married.
Getting married.
I'm due in the church in about an hour.
Dean- - And I still got to pick up my tux.
|- Yeah, right.
Thanks for everything, Luke.
Yeah, sure.
Good luck.
So, a total strikeout? Total.
And, you know, at first,|I felt bad for them so lacking in talent, yet so clueless.
|Then I just felt bad for their guitars.
Where are all the good young musicians|these days? My ears wanted to fly off my head.
I'm going to the music store|to look at things I can't afford.
Coming? - I have to go get ready for this.
|- Right.
Tell me how it goes.
- I will.
Hey, Luke.
|- Hey.
- Rory, where's your mom?|- Around somewhere.
Why? I thought I'd find her at Doose's.
- Did she go back to the inn?|- She was going back to the inn then she was buying|a wedding present for Dean.
She hates it when people send gifts later.
Then, depending on the time I was either gonna meet her back at home|or at the church.
- She have her cell on her?|- I think it's dead.
What's going on? - Or a pager or something?|- Is something wrong? I just need to check something with her.
We can stop by after the wedding.
Don't go to the wedding.
|Don't go to Dean's wedding.
- Why?|- I just Don't go.
- Trust me.
|- Okay.
- It'd just be better this way.
|- Okay.
- So, you're not going?|- I guess not.
Okay, good.
I'll see you guys later.
- Yeah, Luke, I'll see you later.
|- Okay.
- Lorelai, do you have a minute?|- Sure, Kirk.
- We've had a successful disconnection.
|- No more alarm? - No more alarm.
|- Fantastic.
The roofer will be out tomorrow.
|The repair should take a day.
- I'm not gonna inquire about that now.
|- It's all taken care of.
I want to apologize for any inconvenience.
It was no big deal.
I have this strong sense of chivalry|when it comes to women living alone.
That's very nice.
My family tree dates back|to a 12th-century knight.
As a kid I thought that meant|we were related to Ted Knight.
I wrote him a lot of letters.
|He never responded.
- That's cute, though.
|- I just want you to feel safe.
You really do, don't you, Kirk? So, I hope you don't mind|my watching out for you.
Not at all.
Thank you.
I'll see you around.
See you.
I think I found the perfect|wedding present for Dean.
- Sweet, not personal, classy, yet cheap.
|- We're not going.
What? Luke was looking for you and ran into me,|and he was all nervous and then he finally just said|we shouldn't go.
- What does that mean?|- It means we shouldn't go.
- Did he give a reason?|- Not really.
- I'll go talk to him.
|- No, he seemed really serious.
If you saw him, you'd feel the same way.
- He was kind of upset.
|- About Dean's wedding? - Yeah.
|- So, we're not going? - I think it's better that we don't.
|- Okay.
Mystery, though.
Kind of.
You've got your|"nothing to do" weekend back.
Yeah, got that back.
Mom, Kirk's following us|in a little clowny car.
- He's watching out for us.
|- Okay.
Ready? No, no, it's got to look|like we're actually demolishing the porch.
We're gonna do pretend swings.
Which would've been easier|if we had pretend sledgehammers.
Why do they make these so heavy? Even without the swing,|this is a good picture of the two of you about to record|an important moment for the two of you.
- Michel-|- I would love a copy of this for my mantel.
- Such a nice moment.
|- You have to be in the picture, too, Michel.
- Me? I don't know.
All right.
|- That thing have a timer on it? It's set.
I framed the shot.
Grab your hammer and smile.
- One more for safety?|- Okay.
What? Just sometimes, it hits me.
|This place had a long history before us has a long future after us.
I keep thinking it's a part of our lives,|but, really, it's the reverse.
For a little while, I don't know it's like we're a part of its life.
Yeah.
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