Hit The Floor (2013) s04e04 Episode Script
Number's Up
1 Previously on "Hit the Floor" I'm Olivia and Chase's daughter.
Before I knew what was happening, it was over.
It's a good face.
The Devils are nothing without Derek Roman.
I'm gonna make it impossible for them to keep him.
[grunts.]
[whistle blows.]
I heard about your endowment.
Let's just say mine will match.
[smooth electronic music.]
I need someone to have my back on the court.
Play the game or get out of it.
I can't keep letting him down.
- Help me.
- I'll do it.
I will transform you.
I wouldn't mind you not dating anyone else.
Wow.
You really are a mess.
Lucky for you, I like messes.
You have to grab opportunities when you can, Derek Roman.
This is all because of you.
I was inspired by you.
["Chun Li" by Nicki Minaj playing.]
Dunk on 'em, now I'm swingin' off the rim Ain't coming off the bench While I'm comin' off the court fully drenched Ayo, I been on [dramatic hip-hop music.]
Daddy's home! It's about time.
The Roman Emperor returns.
Three game suspension was perfect.
My garden is popping! Well, Devils Nation mourned their king.
Good to have you back.
I was gonna call you.
Me too.
Derek That night Us [dramatic music.]
I just haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
I didn't think I could feel that way again.
And I really think We can go the distance.
[snickers.]
Full stop! We both know what that was! Hot.
Yeah, it was hot.
And we get each other.
But you're here to do a job, and so am I.
So let's not make this anything else.
Friends? Friends.
Okay.
- 98 - Whew! 99 [grunts.]
Mm.
100.
[strains, groans.]
We've been at this for hours.
We're here for you, Pax.
Do you want to be the next level or not? [mumbling.]
I do I can't hear you! I want to be next level.
Good.
Now, drink this.
Uh That looks like swamp water.
Mm-hmm.
Tastes like it too.
Chug-a-lug, buttercup.
No sacrifice is too big, right? No sacrifice is too big Good to hear you say that.
I have a list of other things you'll be sacrificing.
Caffeine, the snooze button, alcohol, sex, processed sugar Wait, what was that last one? Processed sugar.
No, before that.
Sex.
- Come again? - You won't.
Not until you improve on the court.
Your roamin' tallywhacker got you here in the first place.
Both Pax and little Pax are in time-out.
You might need to be the one in time-out.
You want some more swamp water? - No, ma'am.
- Drink that now.
They want to know why I'm in it Love what I do, don't need no opinion I love that you love hiking.
No one loves hiking.
I couldn't fit in my own apartment anymore.
How much stuff can one person possibly have? Says the guy with three boxes of Playstation games.
Four.
Three.
We could move in with Jude.
His place must be huge.
I haven't seen it yet.
Wait, you're dating, and you haven't been to his place? Where does he live? What do you know about him? He's a private guy.
Our relationship is predicated on my respecting that.
I have my own life to focus on.
Thanks to coming through for Lionel in the poker game and the brawl, I nagged seven minutes on Primetime Sports Hour, for a topic of my own choosing.
What's the topic? The youngest team owner in the league, Jude.
Nice job respecting his privacy.
It's work! Next time you highlight someone on national television, consider me.
Thanks to the Devils promo that ISN is airing ad nauseum, emphasis on the "nauseum," London's everywhere.
You woke the beast.
No.
She did.
She's on fire Damn right, he's on fire Hello, Pax.
Leah What are you doing here? I'm meeting someone.
But I was hoping to run into you.
You haven't answered any of my texts.
All my attention is on basketball right now.
Aww Don't you have just a little attention left for me? The Devil Girls meant so much to my mother.
Thank you for taking care of them.
Taking care of them? I'm trying to get rich off of them.
But I can't seem to get a stake like your mama did.
Olivia Vincent, she knew how to work an opportunity now.
You remind me of her.
[smooth hip-hop music.]
Maybe she could've gotten a cut from Jude.
I couldn't.
Jude's got his own problems.
Thanks to Miami, the Commissioner's got his eye on him.
Warren's been out of town, but I made sure he got time with him the minute he was back.
They're in Jude's office now.
That wasn't Jude's fault.
Things have been koo-koo-town around here in general.
It's like Devils Arena was built on an ancient burial ground and no one's safe.
Speaking of not being safe, someone's about to get their butt kicked.
Excuse me.
Pax, what did we just talk about? You've got to stay focused! I'm focused [bright, funky music.]
Look, I'm following the program.
- Mm-hmm.
- All right, she tried, and got denied.
I'm in.
You've inherited a team plagued with scandal.
Don't let my last name fool you, Commissioner.
I didn't inherit anything.
I earned this team.
One weekend.
Already there's been a brawl, a concussion, even a suspension.
Miami came at us hard.
Now, I assume that you've had a conversation with their owner too.
I assume you're not implying I don't know how to do my job.
You're implying I don't know how to do mine.
If you did, you'd choose a different tenor for this conversation.
[dramatic music.]
I'm just passionate about my team.
I don't want any trouble.
Don't be trouble, and there won't be any.
I could be your best friend, or your worst enemy.
Choose wisely.
How did it go? He's been warned.
What does that mean exactly? It means I don't expect we'll have more problems with them.
There was a brawl on his court with his starter throwing fists.
Derek Roman sat out three games.
He served his time.
He burned his house down.
It was full of our people.
Someone could've been hurt, or That is a non-League issue.
If we have to reprimand the players for their personal lives, we' need a much bigger department.
The owner of this team needs more than a talking to, Warren.
We need to We don't need to do anything.
Eve, what is this about for you? [ethereal music.]
It's clear you have an agenda.
I need someone loyal to me and mine.
Not their own.
You ready? Eve, this is my wife, Leah.
Nice to meet you.
You too.
- Let's go.
- Yep.
[upbeat hip-hop music.]
All right, showers.
Rack them.
Good work, fellas.
Derek, this has to stop.
According to who? You or the Commissioner? For the good of the team, Derek.
Look, we both want the same thing.
- I don't know what you want.
- A truce.
That's too bad, because I don't trust you.
Pax, hi.
Eve.
Hey.
Do we know each other? We have a friend in common.
Commissioner Matthews.
I work him.
Ah.
Um I don't know him.
Well, not personally.
You know his wife.
I don't think so.
I saw you with her this morning.
Leah? Leah's married to the Commissioner? You didn't know she was his wife? I didn't know that she was anyone's wife.
I [tense music.]
Is something wrong? I just uh [scoffs.]
Sorry, look, I gotta get to practice.
Um, it was nice meeting you.
Ready for your close-up? My what? ISN is doing a story on you.
Correction: I'm doing a story on you.
What'd I do this time? Became the youngest team owner in League history.
It's your origin story.
Lionel thought it was a great idea.
Well, Jude disagrees.
Jude has no choice.
I already started interviewing people around here.
Most either don't know you or don't like you.
Well, I could've told you that.
Look, Noah, I was a weird kid.
I was always picked last.
I don't give people warm fuzzies.
I don't need that plastered across ISN.
Attention comes with the gig.
Come on, it'll be fun.
You seem to be enjoying the idea of prying into my life.
Not only am I enjoying it, I'm getting paid for it.
You're gonna have to open up eventually, Jude.
[dramatic music.]
[knocking on door.]
Guess who has the paperwork that will give you your star player back.
Great.
We can put this mess behind us, and focus on Portland.
LA owns Portland.
What's to focus on? You can't underestimate any situation.
The minute you let your guard down is when you make the biggest mistakes.
So I'm doing my research, going over stats, learning each of their players' strengths and weaknesses.
You never know when that kind of information comes in handy.
Sometimes winning or losing isn't about what you know, but when you use it.
What's that? "The Art of War"? "Daly Life", the autobiography of Chuck Daly, he coached the Olympic Dream Team.
I know who Chuck Daly is.
I'm surprised you did.
Mm.
What was that you said about underestimating? Where do I sign? Here.
Here.
[soft music.]
And here.
Derek's all yours.
[phone buzzes.]
Everything okay? No.
Yeah, uh I hope so.
Something I have to deal with.
I just don't know how.
Nothing's impossible, German.
There's always a new play to be made.
What are you doing out here? [ominous music.]
Having a meltdown.
Let's hear it.
I'm on a track now.
I have a plan, and I can't afford to mess that up, and it's too easy to around here.
I gotta be smarter.
I mean, this was our dream since we were kids.
I I can't blow it.
Who's we? Look, I'm not trying to unload on anyone here, okay? I just That first day when you were running in, you told me you owed me your life.
I'm collecting.
Me and my brother Marcus He was the star of the family.
Better than I ever was, but He never got the chance to play.
What happened to him? Aneurism.
We were fighting over who had to fix the garbage disposal for my mom.
She jammed that thing at least once a week.
One minute he was under the sink, and And the next He, uh Thank you.
For telling me.
You're deeper than people give you credit for.
Well, than I give you credit for.
You're a good guy, Pax.
And if you have a meltdown again, just ask me, and I'll remind you.
Derek, I have a problem.
No, you gave up the plaid, you're good.
What's going on? Sometimes I like a little gambling with my cards.
You know, as an outlet, something I picked up in Boston.
And, uh I made a bad bet that's come back to haunt me.
How much you need? I wish it was that easy, man.
Look, now that I've landed this coaching job Paying back the debt is not an option anymore.
What do they want then? [dramatic music.]
A guaranteed spread on the next game.
A guaranteed I know.
But it's Portland, you know, and we just have to make sure the spread stays within ten.
The way you handle the ball, man, no one will ever know.
I'd know.
It's an early season game, so nothing's riding on it.
I'm so sorry I have to ask.
All right, if I could get out of this on my own, I would.
I wouldn't blame you if you say no.
I don't know, man.
Okay.
So I just wanted to show you some appreciation for that spark-tacular promo.
Are you proposing to me? Unruly lace.
Turn around, look up, please.
[stirring music.]
Oh, my God.
Damn.
Iconic.
Yeah, Derek loved the promo too.
He thought the sparks were gonna hurt.
When was he there? After everyone left.
You and Derek are having sex! Had.
And it was a one-time thing.
We're just friends.
Missionary or you on top? Both.
Clothes off or on? Some on and some off.
More than friends.
How can you tell based on that? I was just interested.
I'm basing it on the fact that I just showed you this amazing poster, and the first thing you mentioned was Derek.
Look, you're crazy.
We're friends, and that's that.
[chuckles.]
All right, listen up, y'all.
We are about to be do-gooders.
Our next dance is gonna be for charity.
But that's the only kindness we're gonna show, 'cause it's an underground vogue battle, against each other.
Whoever nets the most dough gets to death drop on everyone else's grave.
Um - Amazing idea.
- I know.
Except Except what? Well, except why underground? That's how vogue battles work, darling.
But this is a Kyle Hart vogue battle.
It should be a media event, crawling with press.
It's great publicity for the Devil Girls.
I mean, what good's doing good if no one's there to see it? [exciting music.]
I'll make some calls.
Publicity for the Devil Girls, huh? Or are you just looking for publicity for yourself? This is my dance.
I'm gonna win.
So delusional doesn't just apply to your fashion sense.
Vouging is about improv.
You're known for your choreography.
You're known for dancing my choreography.
I guess we'll just have to see who thinks faster on their feet.
Yeah, well, you better hope it's you.
Because if I take this, that would be two big-time back-to-back wins for me.
[dramatic music.]
Good luck, though.
[dramatic hip-hop music.]
You look like you got the weight of the world on your shoulders.
Same.
What's going on? I got asked to do a favor for a friend.
Doesn't sound so difficult.
You? Vogue battle.
That doesn't sound too difficult either.
I need to win, and I need to win big.
I convinced Kyle to make it a media event.
Now, I have to get everyone there.
It would be huge if the ballers went.
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
Look, this is a favor I'm happy to do.
[driving hip-hop music.]
Dreams that I was f-ed in Hollywood Los Angeles is putting on a clinic against Portland tonight! [whistle blows.]
[cheers and applause.]
Mr.
Matthews.
Thanks for accepting my invite.
I know you had your choice of games today.
Leah, this is Jude Kinkade, new owner of the team.
Oh, nice to meet you.
Your husband is intimidating as hell.
[clears throat.]
Commissioner, if you have a minute I don't.
I have everything under control here, Eve.
We'll talk tomorrow.
[dramatic music.]
LA's got the ball and it's a ten-point game.
Pax Lowe, he has been solid tonight.
Overmatched, out clashed At just the first look I should pass, I should gag [whistle blows.]
[horn blares.]
Thank you.
Look, you're gonna have to find another outlet, 'cause this will never happen again.
I hear you.
Never again.
Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
Lonely Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
All that's missing is the Sarah McLachlan song.
I couldn't get the rights.
You want to see what I've got so far? I really don't Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
The son of one of the most powerful men in basketball was chucked like a dead ball, raised by a single mother in government housing in South Florida.
Kinkade was driven by a need for acceptance, to be a part of something.
And if he wasn't going to get help, he'd do it himself.
We're talking to the man who overcame incredible obstacles to become the youngest team owner in the history of the sport.
- Some spin.
- It's not spin.
Well, there's a Noah punchline in there eventually.
Jude, this is how I see you.
How I want the world to see you.
It's how you need to see yourself.
[dramatic music.]
Can I have my bill, please? Thanks.
Well, hello again.
What are you doing here? Trying to stay out of trouble.
And failing.
How so? Do you think I'm trouble? Maybe.
I'd never want to be trouble for you, German.
Not you.
It's complicated, Eve.
It doesn't have to be.
So why are you here? I had to pick up some receipts for the Commissioner.
I thought you might be staying here.
I could be.
I gotta go.
[dramatic music.]
Everybody grab your seats for the Vogue Battle! Hey, bro, thanks for inviting me on the party bus.
It's for the team.
You're part of the team, aren't you? I'm trying.
Succeeding.
Whatever you're doing is working.
I give you shit for all my stats you throw in my face, but it's good gas in my tank.
Are you saying that you love me? I'm saying you're banished from the party bus.
Welcome to the Devil Girls' Vogue Ball, y'all.
[cheers and applause.]
[shouts.]
[cheers and applause.]
Let the lady tell you the rules.
Go ahead, mama.
Thank you.
We are gonna dance for you.
You see these things right here? These suckers'll climb based on your applause and text donations.
You like somebody? You make it rain! [cheers and applause.]
So are you dancing for charity or Derek? I could ask you the same question, but I don't have to.
You're crazy.
You want him.
You want him.
Are y'all ready to battle? [cheers and applause.]
We're gonna start with a little team performance.
Ladies, play nice.
Hey, hey, hey, let's go, let's go, let's go.
[driving dance music.]
Oh, bitch, let the battles begin! Let's go.
Everybody want to be the commentator But your chance going down like an elevator Floor one bring it down to the lobby 'Cause I do this shit for a hobby 'Cause everybody wanna be the kit cat ow Everybody wanna be the bang, bang Everybody wanna be the kit cat ow The cat-cat, the kitty cat, bang, ow Barbie and Ken went for a swim Ken jumped out, started voguing them Barbie said bitch, why you going at it? Take a minute and go dramatic January, February, March April, May, June, July August, September, October, November December, girl When's your birthday Capricorn and curry is spicy Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio Sagittarius, girl, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Why don't you sit right there, let me tell you mine So uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Ooh, don't I look sexy, text me Ooh, don't I look texty, sexy Sexy, texty, sexy, sexy, sexy Ooh, ooh, ow, bang Oh, do it right now, bang Ooh, ow, ow, yes God, ooh Bang, bang, shake it on out Bang, bang, shake it on out Bang, bang, don't shake it, don't shake it, don't, uh Bang, bang, don't shake it, don't, ow, uh Which one bet, which one, which one Like cat the cat the cat, ow We've got some crowd taggin' in.
Sexy, sexy, bring it Let's bring it, Let's bring it Bring it, bring it, bring it Let's bring it now ow Bring it, bring it, bring it Let's bring it now ow Ooh, take it, take it, ooh Now take it, take it, bring it the back now Take it, take it, bring it from the back now Take, take, bring from the back now Take, take, shake shake your back now Shake, shake, shake, shake the back now Ooh, let's go! Wanna give it that, you want to serve that You wanna give it that, you want to serve that Give that, serve that, point that leg Give that, serve that, do it for the hag Give that, serve that, prr, ow Give that kitty kitty bang ow Kitty kitty, kitty kitty, bang bang ow The cat-cat, the bang-bang ooh It's down to London and Jamie! Oh, let's go! Here we here we go-go Let's go, here we here we go What that ow, what that, bang What what the ow that bang, ow What what the ow, what what the ooh 1,001 and just serve that [dinging.]
Now at 3,000 Let's just serve that Won't you hold it, won't you serve it Won't you hold it, won't you serve it Now, now, now [dinging.]
[siren.]
Ooh, ladies and gentlemen, our grand-prize of the Vogue Ball, Jamie! Good job, she did it, she did it.
She took that grand prize.
She took that grand prize.
She did it, grand prize.
She took that grand prize, give her a round of applause.
Work, Jamie, work, girl, ow! [cheers and applause.]
Let's go! Derek! I'm off duty.
I'll keep this quick.
You will trust me, because I'm the owner and you have to.
- Do I know? - It's my job to earn it.
And I will.
I don't know how, but I've done a hell of a lot more with a hell of a lot less.
And I'll figure this out too.
[dramatic music.]
It's Lawson.
L-A-W-S-O-N.
Thanks.
Whatever drama you and London got going on really paid off tonight.
It almost seems like you planned it this way.
Didn't it? Fine with me, I won.
How bad did I wreck her? It was a knockout, eventually.
Eventually? London was in the lead, till the last second, when a $10,000 donation came your way.
From who? That's the number right there.
[dramatic music.]
Hey.
Great job tonight.
Thanks.
I appreciate the conversation we had before.
I was wondering One sec! Sorry.
Yo, it's Derek.
You know what to do.
You all right? Yeah.
Yes.
Sorry.
Noah.
You'll never believe what just happened! I never seen you before I never seen you It's like I never seen you before I never seen you I didn't want to order without you.
Yeah, um Eve, I'm not staying.
Look, you're extremely capable.
You are also extremely strong-willed.
It's clear you have a personal issue with the Devils and I can't have that.
I'm sorry.
I need someone I can trust to have my back.
You can trust me to have your back.
The person you can't trust is at home.
[suspenseful music.]
What are you talking about? Your wife cheated on you with a Devil.
Pax Lowe.
I have the hotel receipts to prove it.
I'm so sorry.
[muffled hip-hop music playing.]
That ride is ridiculous.
What's ridiculous is you in that ring tonight.
Well done.
I didn't win.
A technicality.
You're biased, you're my buddy.
But watching you dance, buddy wasn't what I was feeling.
No? You tell me.
You watching me too? Would you have won tonight? What's your moves? Show me.
I don't know why we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way there ain't no way We connect, there ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect, there ain't no way There ain't no way we connect, there ain't no way There ain't no way there ain't no way 'Cause you know your body is something crazy Watching your body, I can't get lazy High off the ganja, we far from gazy Looked at each other, we look like aliens There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way There ain't no way we connect She likes shows on Broadway Games at the Garden She's not so bougie She's a cool chick - [burps.]
- Whew! Ooh, child.
So you have a new member.
I'm gonna have to get a couple of ribs removed for it to fit.
Aren't you sweet? Well, I'll pay for the surgery, because I made 350 grand tonight.
Don't you mean the charity made 350 grand? Charity begins at home.
Relax, it's going to charity.
I'll just stay poor.
Maybe not much longer.
Your program is paying off.
I'm doing way better on the court.
Derek even complimented me on it.
A compliment from Derek Roman? Now, that's money in the bank! Go get us some more hooch, would you, darling? This deserves a toast.
What am I? The bottle bitch? Here's your tip.
Ponytails! I could tell you were feeling good when you sashayed up to Jamie.
You were gonna ask her out.
Maybe.
Look at you.
Focused, making moves.
You said I have potential.
I'm finally feeling it on and off the court.
Stick with me.
The best is yet to come.
Look at us.
Burning the midnight oil.
I have a few follow-up questions for you.
Hit me.
I've got your work stuff.
I just need a little more color.
All work, no play.
Sorry.
Well, not no play.
You were in a pretty public relationship.
With a Devil.
It wasn't public.
You made out on the jumbotron.
Was that a political statement, or It wasn't a statement at all.
It just happened.
Well, in front of 25,000 people.
Not to mention millions at home.
You and Zero were the it couple.
Such a high-profile relationship, but such a private break-up.
What happened? I'm not ready to do this.
Okay.
It's late, we can pick this up tomorrow.
I mean this Us [dramatic music.]
I'm sorry, I'll stop with the digging.
It's not that, it's just I I'll call you.
No, you won't.
Bye, Jude.
[muffled moaning.]
[ominous music.]
[moaning.]
Warren, good to see you.
Your player, Pax Lowe, screwed my wife! I want him gone.
I want him gone! [knocking on door.]
[soft, tense music.]
German.
You can have me like a beast Have me, have me Only you can make me weak Me weak, me weak All it really takes is your Claws out, claws out All it really takes is your Claws out Next on "Hit the Floor" So you have nothing to say about your romantic relationship with Derek Roman? My what now? The Isnys, the night the sports world gathers to celebrate their greatness.
[dramatic music.]
Derek, someone could see.
I drove your Mercedes here.
She rides like a dream.
I know exactly how she rides.
Oh, the things we've shared.
I'll see to it that you never play professional basketball again.
The person who called him and got him all worked up was you.
Before I knew what was happening, it was over.
It's a good face.
The Devils are nothing without Derek Roman.
I'm gonna make it impossible for them to keep him.
[grunts.]
[whistle blows.]
I heard about your endowment.
Let's just say mine will match.
[smooth electronic music.]
I need someone to have my back on the court.
Play the game or get out of it.
I can't keep letting him down.
- Help me.
- I'll do it.
I will transform you.
I wouldn't mind you not dating anyone else.
Wow.
You really are a mess.
Lucky for you, I like messes.
You have to grab opportunities when you can, Derek Roman.
This is all because of you.
I was inspired by you.
["Chun Li" by Nicki Minaj playing.]
Dunk on 'em, now I'm swingin' off the rim Ain't coming off the bench While I'm comin' off the court fully drenched Ayo, I been on [dramatic hip-hop music.]
Daddy's home! It's about time.
The Roman Emperor returns.
Three game suspension was perfect.
My garden is popping! Well, Devils Nation mourned their king.
Good to have you back.
I was gonna call you.
Me too.
Derek That night Us [dramatic music.]
I just haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
I didn't think I could feel that way again.
And I really think We can go the distance.
[snickers.]
Full stop! We both know what that was! Hot.
Yeah, it was hot.
And we get each other.
But you're here to do a job, and so am I.
So let's not make this anything else.
Friends? Friends.
Okay.
- 98 - Whew! 99 [grunts.]
Mm.
100.
[strains, groans.]
We've been at this for hours.
We're here for you, Pax.
Do you want to be the next level or not? [mumbling.]
I do I can't hear you! I want to be next level.
Good.
Now, drink this.
Uh That looks like swamp water.
Mm-hmm.
Tastes like it too.
Chug-a-lug, buttercup.
No sacrifice is too big, right? No sacrifice is too big Good to hear you say that.
I have a list of other things you'll be sacrificing.
Caffeine, the snooze button, alcohol, sex, processed sugar Wait, what was that last one? Processed sugar.
No, before that.
Sex.
- Come again? - You won't.
Not until you improve on the court.
Your roamin' tallywhacker got you here in the first place.
Both Pax and little Pax are in time-out.
You might need to be the one in time-out.
You want some more swamp water? - No, ma'am.
- Drink that now.
They want to know why I'm in it Love what I do, don't need no opinion I love that you love hiking.
No one loves hiking.
I couldn't fit in my own apartment anymore.
How much stuff can one person possibly have? Says the guy with three boxes of Playstation games.
Four.
Three.
We could move in with Jude.
His place must be huge.
I haven't seen it yet.
Wait, you're dating, and you haven't been to his place? Where does he live? What do you know about him? He's a private guy.
Our relationship is predicated on my respecting that.
I have my own life to focus on.
Thanks to coming through for Lionel in the poker game and the brawl, I nagged seven minutes on Primetime Sports Hour, for a topic of my own choosing.
What's the topic? The youngest team owner in the league, Jude.
Nice job respecting his privacy.
It's work! Next time you highlight someone on national television, consider me.
Thanks to the Devils promo that ISN is airing ad nauseum, emphasis on the "nauseum," London's everywhere.
You woke the beast.
No.
She did.
She's on fire Damn right, he's on fire Hello, Pax.
Leah What are you doing here? I'm meeting someone.
But I was hoping to run into you.
You haven't answered any of my texts.
All my attention is on basketball right now.
Aww Don't you have just a little attention left for me? The Devil Girls meant so much to my mother.
Thank you for taking care of them.
Taking care of them? I'm trying to get rich off of them.
But I can't seem to get a stake like your mama did.
Olivia Vincent, she knew how to work an opportunity now.
You remind me of her.
[smooth hip-hop music.]
Maybe she could've gotten a cut from Jude.
I couldn't.
Jude's got his own problems.
Thanks to Miami, the Commissioner's got his eye on him.
Warren's been out of town, but I made sure he got time with him the minute he was back.
They're in Jude's office now.
That wasn't Jude's fault.
Things have been koo-koo-town around here in general.
It's like Devils Arena was built on an ancient burial ground and no one's safe.
Speaking of not being safe, someone's about to get their butt kicked.
Excuse me.
Pax, what did we just talk about? You've got to stay focused! I'm focused [bright, funky music.]
Look, I'm following the program.
- Mm-hmm.
- All right, she tried, and got denied.
I'm in.
You've inherited a team plagued with scandal.
Don't let my last name fool you, Commissioner.
I didn't inherit anything.
I earned this team.
One weekend.
Already there's been a brawl, a concussion, even a suspension.
Miami came at us hard.
Now, I assume that you've had a conversation with their owner too.
I assume you're not implying I don't know how to do my job.
You're implying I don't know how to do mine.
If you did, you'd choose a different tenor for this conversation.
[dramatic music.]
I'm just passionate about my team.
I don't want any trouble.
Don't be trouble, and there won't be any.
I could be your best friend, or your worst enemy.
Choose wisely.
How did it go? He's been warned.
What does that mean exactly? It means I don't expect we'll have more problems with them.
There was a brawl on his court with his starter throwing fists.
Derek Roman sat out three games.
He served his time.
He burned his house down.
It was full of our people.
Someone could've been hurt, or That is a non-League issue.
If we have to reprimand the players for their personal lives, we' need a much bigger department.
The owner of this team needs more than a talking to, Warren.
We need to We don't need to do anything.
Eve, what is this about for you? [ethereal music.]
It's clear you have an agenda.
I need someone loyal to me and mine.
Not their own.
You ready? Eve, this is my wife, Leah.
Nice to meet you.
You too.
- Let's go.
- Yep.
[upbeat hip-hop music.]
All right, showers.
Rack them.
Good work, fellas.
Derek, this has to stop.
According to who? You or the Commissioner? For the good of the team, Derek.
Look, we both want the same thing.
- I don't know what you want.
- A truce.
That's too bad, because I don't trust you.
Pax, hi.
Eve.
Hey.
Do we know each other? We have a friend in common.
Commissioner Matthews.
I work him.
Ah.
Um I don't know him.
Well, not personally.
You know his wife.
I don't think so.
I saw you with her this morning.
Leah? Leah's married to the Commissioner? You didn't know she was his wife? I didn't know that she was anyone's wife.
I [tense music.]
Is something wrong? I just uh [scoffs.]
Sorry, look, I gotta get to practice.
Um, it was nice meeting you.
Ready for your close-up? My what? ISN is doing a story on you.
Correction: I'm doing a story on you.
What'd I do this time? Became the youngest team owner in League history.
It's your origin story.
Lionel thought it was a great idea.
Well, Jude disagrees.
Jude has no choice.
I already started interviewing people around here.
Most either don't know you or don't like you.
Well, I could've told you that.
Look, Noah, I was a weird kid.
I was always picked last.
I don't give people warm fuzzies.
I don't need that plastered across ISN.
Attention comes with the gig.
Come on, it'll be fun.
You seem to be enjoying the idea of prying into my life.
Not only am I enjoying it, I'm getting paid for it.
You're gonna have to open up eventually, Jude.
[dramatic music.]
[knocking on door.]
Guess who has the paperwork that will give you your star player back.
Great.
We can put this mess behind us, and focus on Portland.
LA owns Portland.
What's to focus on? You can't underestimate any situation.
The minute you let your guard down is when you make the biggest mistakes.
So I'm doing my research, going over stats, learning each of their players' strengths and weaknesses.
You never know when that kind of information comes in handy.
Sometimes winning or losing isn't about what you know, but when you use it.
What's that? "The Art of War"? "Daly Life", the autobiography of Chuck Daly, he coached the Olympic Dream Team.
I know who Chuck Daly is.
I'm surprised you did.
Mm.
What was that you said about underestimating? Where do I sign? Here.
Here.
[soft music.]
And here.
Derek's all yours.
[phone buzzes.]
Everything okay? No.
Yeah, uh I hope so.
Something I have to deal with.
I just don't know how.
Nothing's impossible, German.
There's always a new play to be made.
What are you doing out here? [ominous music.]
Having a meltdown.
Let's hear it.
I'm on a track now.
I have a plan, and I can't afford to mess that up, and it's too easy to around here.
I gotta be smarter.
I mean, this was our dream since we were kids.
I I can't blow it.
Who's we? Look, I'm not trying to unload on anyone here, okay? I just That first day when you were running in, you told me you owed me your life.
I'm collecting.
Me and my brother Marcus He was the star of the family.
Better than I ever was, but He never got the chance to play.
What happened to him? Aneurism.
We were fighting over who had to fix the garbage disposal for my mom.
She jammed that thing at least once a week.
One minute he was under the sink, and And the next He, uh Thank you.
For telling me.
You're deeper than people give you credit for.
Well, than I give you credit for.
You're a good guy, Pax.
And if you have a meltdown again, just ask me, and I'll remind you.
Derek, I have a problem.
No, you gave up the plaid, you're good.
What's going on? Sometimes I like a little gambling with my cards.
You know, as an outlet, something I picked up in Boston.
And, uh I made a bad bet that's come back to haunt me.
How much you need? I wish it was that easy, man.
Look, now that I've landed this coaching job Paying back the debt is not an option anymore.
What do they want then? [dramatic music.]
A guaranteed spread on the next game.
A guaranteed I know.
But it's Portland, you know, and we just have to make sure the spread stays within ten.
The way you handle the ball, man, no one will ever know.
I'd know.
It's an early season game, so nothing's riding on it.
I'm so sorry I have to ask.
All right, if I could get out of this on my own, I would.
I wouldn't blame you if you say no.
I don't know, man.
Okay.
So I just wanted to show you some appreciation for that spark-tacular promo.
Are you proposing to me? Unruly lace.
Turn around, look up, please.
[stirring music.]
Oh, my God.
Damn.
Iconic.
Yeah, Derek loved the promo too.
He thought the sparks were gonna hurt.
When was he there? After everyone left.
You and Derek are having sex! Had.
And it was a one-time thing.
We're just friends.
Missionary or you on top? Both.
Clothes off or on? Some on and some off.
More than friends.
How can you tell based on that? I was just interested.
I'm basing it on the fact that I just showed you this amazing poster, and the first thing you mentioned was Derek.
Look, you're crazy.
We're friends, and that's that.
[chuckles.]
All right, listen up, y'all.
We are about to be do-gooders.
Our next dance is gonna be for charity.
But that's the only kindness we're gonna show, 'cause it's an underground vogue battle, against each other.
Whoever nets the most dough gets to death drop on everyone else's grave.
Um - Amazing idea.
- I know.
Except Except what? Well, except why underground? That's how vogue battles work, darling.
But this is a Kyle Hart vogue battle.
It should be a media event, crawling with press.
It's great publicity for the Devil Girls.
I mean, what good's doing good if no one's there to see it? [exciting music.]
I'll make some calls.
Publicity for the Devil Girls, huh? Or are you just looking for publicity for yourself? This is my dance.
I'm gonna win.
So delusional doesn't just apply to your fashion sense.
Vouging is about improv.
You're known for your choreography.
You're known for dancing my choreography.
I guess we'll just have to see who thinks faster on their feet.
Yeah, well, you better hope it's you.
Because if I take this, that would be two big-time back-to-back wins for me.
[dramatic music.]
Good luck, though.
[dramatic hip-hop music.]
You look like you got the weight of the world on your shoulders.
Same.
What's going on? I got asked to do a favor for a friend.
Doesn't sound so difficult.
You? Vogue battle.
That doesn't sound too difficult either.
I need to win, and I need to win big.
I convinced Kyle to make it a media event.
Now, I have to get everyone there.
It would be huge if the ballers went.
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
Look, this is a favor I'm happy to do.
[driving hip-hop music.]
Dreams that I was f-ed in Hollywood Los Angeles is putting on a clinic against Portland tonight! [whistle blows.]
[cheers and applause.]
Mr.
Matthews.
Thanks for accepting my invite.
I know you had your choice of games today.
Leah, this is Jude Kinkade, new owner of the team.
Oh, nice to meet you.
Your husband is intimidating as hell.
[clears throat.]
Commissioner, if you have a minute I don't.
I have everything under control here, Eve.
We'll talk tomorrow.
[dramatic music.]
LA's got the ball and it's a ten-point game.
Pax Lowe, he has been solid tonight.
Overmatched, out clashed At just the first look I should pass, I should gag [whistle blows.]
[horn blares.]
Thank you.
Look, you're gonna have to find another outlet, 'cause this will never happen again.
I hear you.
Never again.
Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
Lonely Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
All that's missing is the Sarah McLachlan song.
I couldn't get the rights.
You want to see what I've got so far? I really don't Jude Kinkade was a lonely kid.
The son of one of the most powerful men in basketball was chucked like a dead ball, raised by a single mother in government housing in South Florida.
Kinkade was driven by a need for acceptance, to be a part of something.
And if he wasn't going to get help, he'd do it himself.
We're talking to the man who overcame incredible obstacles to become the youngest team owner in the history of the sport.
- Some spin.
- It's not spin.
Well, there's a Noah punchline in there eventually.
Jude, this is how I see you.
How I want the world to see you.
It's how you need to see yourself.
[dramatic music.]
Can I have my bill, please? Thanks.
Well, hello again.
What are you doing here? Trying to stay out of trouble.
And failing.
How so? Do you think I'm trouble? Maybe.
I'd never want to be trouble for you, German.
Not you.
It's complicated, Eve.
It doesn't have to be.
So why are you here? I had to pick up some receipts for the Commissioner.
I thought you might be staying here.
I could be.
I gotta go.
[dramatic music.]
Everybody grab your seats for the Vogue Battle! Hey, bro, thanks for inviting me on the party bus.
It's for the team.
You're part of the team, aren't you? I'm trying.
Succeeding.
Whatever you're doing is working.
I give you shit for all my stats you throw in my face, but it's good gas in my tank.
Are you saying that you love me? I'm saying you're banished from the party bus.
Welcome to the Devil Girls' Vogue Ball, y'all.
[cheers and applause.]
[shouts.]
[cheers and applause.]
Let the lady tell you the rules.
Go ahead, mama.
Thank you.
We are gonna dance for you.
You see these things right here? These suckers'll climb based on your applause and text donations.
You like somebody? You make it rain! [cheers and applause.]
So are you dancing for charity or Derek? I could ask you the same question, but I don't have to.
You're crazy.
You want him.
You want him.
Are y'all ready to battle? [cheers and applause.]
We're gonna start with a little team performance.
Ladies, play nice.
Hey, hey, hey, let's go, let's go, let's go.
[driving dance music.]
Oh, bitch, let the battles begin! Let's go.
Everybody want to be the commentator But your chance going down like an elevator Floor one bring it down to the lobby 'Cause I do this shit for a hobby 'Cause everybody wanna be the kit cat ow Everybody wanna be the bang, bang Everybody wanna be the kit cat ow The cat-cat, the kitty cat, bang, ow Barbie and Ken went for a swim Ken jumped out, started voguing them Barbie said bitch, why you going at it? Take a minute and go dramatic January, February, March April, May, June, July August, September, October, November December, girl When's your birthday Capricorn and curry is spicy Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Cancer Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio Sagittarius, girl, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Why don't you sit right there, let me tell you mine So uh, what's your zodiac sign? Uh, what's your zodiac sign? Ooh, don't I look sexy, text me Ooh, don't I look texty, sexy Sexy, texty, sexy, sexy, sexy Ooh, ooh, ow, bang Oh, do it right now, bang Ooh, ow, ow, yes God, ooh Bang, bang, shake it on out Bang, bang, shake it on out Bang, bang, don't shake it, don't shake it, don't, uh Bang, bang, don't shake it, don't, ow, uh Which one bet, which one, which one Like cat the cat the cat, ow We've got some crowd taggin' in.
Sexy, sexy, bring it Let's bring it, Let's bring it Bring it, bring it, bring it Let's bring it now ow Bring it, bring it, bring it Let's bring it now ow Ooh, take it, take it, ooh Now take it, take it, bring it the back now Take it, take it, bring it from the back now Take, take, bring from the back now Take, take, shake shake your back now Shake, shake, shake, shake the back now Ooh, let's go! Wanna give it that, you want to serve that You wanna give it that, you want to serve that Give that, serve that, point that leg Give that, serve that, do it for the hag Give that, serve that, prr, ow Give that kitty kitty bang ow Kitty kitty, kitty kitty, bang bang ow The cat-cat, the bang-bang ooh It's down to London and Jamie! Oh, let's go! Here we here we go-go Let's go, here we here we go What that ow, what that, bang What what the ow that bang, ow What what the ow, what what the ooh 1,001 and just serve that [dinging.]
Now at 3,000 Let's just serve that Won't you hold it, won't you serve it Won't you hold it, won't you serve it Now, now, now [dinging.]
[siren.]
Ooh, ladies and gentlemen, our grand-prize of the Vogue Ball, Jamie! Good job, she did it, she did it.
She took that grand prize.
She took that grand prize.
She did it, grand prize.
She took that grand prize, give her a round of applause.
Work, Jamie, work, girl, ow! [cheers and applause.]
Let's go! Derek! I'm off duty.
I'll keep this quick.
You will trust me, because I'm the owner and you have to.
- Do I know? - It's my job to earn it.
And I will.
I don't know how, but I've done a hell of a lot more with a hell of a lot less.
And I'll figure this out too.
[dramatic music.]
It's Lawson.
L-A-W-S-O-N.
Thanks.
Whatever drama you and London got going on really paid off tonight.
It almost seems like you planned it this way.
Didn't it? Fine with me, I won.
How bad did I wreck her? It was a knockout, eventually.
Eventually? London was in the lead, till the last second, when a $10,000 donation came your way.
From who? That's the number right there.
[dramatic music.]
Hey.
Great job tonight.
Thanks.
I appreciate the conversation we had before.
I was wondering One sec! Sorry.
Yo, it's Derek.
You know what to do.
You all right? Yeah.
Yes.
Sorry.
Noah.
You'll never believe what just happened! I never seen you before I never seen you It's like I never seen you before I never seen you I didn't want to order without you.
Yeah, um Eve, I'm not staying.
Look, you're extremely capable.
You are also extremely strong-willed.
It's clear you have a personal issue with the Devils and I can't have that.
I'm sorry.
I need someone I can trust to have my back.
You can trust me to have your back.
The person you can't trust is at home.
[suspenseful music.]
What are you talking about? Your wife cheated on you with a Devil.
Pax Lowe.
I have the hotel receipts to prove it.
I'm so sorry.
[muffled hip-hop music playing.]
That ride is ridiculous.
What's ridiculous is you in that ring tonight.
Well done.
I didn't win.
A technicality.
You're biased, you're my buddy.
But watching you dance, buddy wasn't what I was feeling.
No? You tell me.
You watching me too? Would you have won tonight? What's your moves? Show me.
I don't know why we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way there ain't no way We connect, there ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect, there ain't no way There ain't no way we connect, there ain't no way There ain't no way there ain't no way 'Cause you know your body is something crazy Watching your body, I can't get lazy High off the ganja, we far from gazy Looked at each other, we look like aliens There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way we connect There ain't no way There ain't no way we connect She likes shows on Broadway Games at the Garden She's not so bougie She's a cool chick - [burps.]
- Whew! Ooh, child.
So you have a new member.
I'm gonna have to get a couple of ribs removed for it to fit.
Aren't you sweet? Well, I'll pay for the surgery, because I made 350 grand tonight.
Don't you mean the charity made 350 grand? Charity begins at home.
Relax, it's going to charity.
I'll just stay poor.
Maybe not much longer.
Your program is paying off.
I'm doing way better on the court.
Derek even complimented me on it.
A compliment from Derek Roman? Now, that's money in the bank! Go get us some more hooch, would you, darling? This deserves a toast.
What am I? The bottle bitch? Here's your tip.
Ponytails! I could tell you were feeling good when you sashayed up to Jamie.
You were gonna ask her out.
Maybe.
Look at you.
Focused, making moves.
You said I have potential.
I'm finally feeling it on and off the court.
Stick with me.
The best is yet to come.
Look at us.
Burning the midnight oil.
I have a few follow-up questions for you.
Hit me.
I've got your work stuff.
I just need a little more color.
All work, no play.
Sorry.
Well, not no play.
You were in a pretty public relationship.
With a Devil.
It wasn't public.
You made out on the jumbotron.
Was that a political statement, or It wasn't a statement at all.
It just happened.
Well, in front of 25,000 people.
Not to mention millions at home.
You and Zero were the it couple.
Such a high-profile relationship, but such a private break-up.
What happened? I'm not ready to do this.
Okay.
It's late, we can pick this up tomorrow.
I mean this Us [dramatic music.]
I'm sorry, I'll stop with the digging.
It's not that, it's just I I'll call you.
No, you won't.
Bye, Jude.
[muffled moaning.]
[ominous music.]
[moaning.]
Warren, good to see you.
Your player, Pax Lowe, screwed my wife! I want him gone.
I want him gone! [knocking on door.]
[soft, tense music.]
German.
You can have me like a beast Have me, have me Only you can make me weak Me weak, me weak All it really takes is your Claws out, claws out All it really takes is your Claws out Next on "Hit the Floor" So you have nothing to say about your romantic relationship with Derek Roman? My what now? The Isnys, the night the sports world gathers to celebrate their greatness.
[dramatic music.]
Derek, someone could see.
I drove your Mercedes here.
She rides like a dream.
I know exactly how she rides.
Oh, the things we've shared.
I'll see to it that you never play professional basketball again.
The person who called him and got him all worked up was you.