Louie s04e04 Episode Script
Elevator, Pt. 1
No.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you okay? I'm having a scary dream.
No, no, no, no, no.
You're awake now, it's over now.
It's over.
No, I'm still dreaming.
But it's better now.
Okay.
Okay.
There you go.
Daddy? Shh Yeah.
I'm having a nice dream now.
Okay, good.
Keep having a nice dream, okay? Yeah.
You promise? Got it.
Okay, good.
Goodnight.
Goodnight, Daddy.
Love you.
Dad, I forgot my science notebook at your house.
Okay.
No, but I need it and I'm going to Mom's house.
I'll get it to your mom later.
What? Daddy.
Girls, do we know the subway rules? Daddy.
Yes.
Do we remember the subway rules? What are they? Daddy-- Let's hear the subway-- just a second-- let's hear-- - I'm still dreaming.
- Okay, come here, come here, come here, come here.
Daddy, I'm still dreaming.
What? I'm still dreaming.
This is all my dream, it's really cool.
It's almost like real life.
Okay, the subway rules.
If you get on the train-- Wait, wait, wait.
But-- okay, if you get-- Let's say you get on the train-- Let's say I get on the train and you don't, you get somehow stuck on the platform by yourself, what do you do? Then we-- we stay right there and then you'll come back to us.
That's right.
Stay in that exact spot.
You stay in that exact spot and you don't move, right? Right.
Bingo.
Okay, what if you got on the train and somehow I don't get on the train? When you're alone on the train, what do you do? We get off at the next spot.
At the next stop.
At the next stop.
What do you do there? And then we stay there and we don't let anyone move us and we stay right there until you come get us.
Ahh! Come on.
This dream's cool.
Ah, it's coming, come on.
Ba-ba-ba, come on.
Go, go, go, come on.
Jane, you're with me? Yeah.
Let's go.
Get on, get on, get on, get on.
Okay.
So what do you need from your mom's house? You need your science notebook.
I need my science notebook and I need it for Wednesday.
So if I get it to you tomorrow, that's okay? Yeah.
Do you need anything else? No, that's it.
I need it by Wednesday.
By Wednesday? So if I get it to you tomorrow, that's okay? Yeah.
Stand clear of the closing doors, please.
Jane, Jane! It's okay, Daddy.
Jane! Stop the train! Open the door! It's okay, Daddy.
I'm going to stay right here.
- Jane, Jane! - I'll stay right here.
It's my dream.
Jane! Jane! I'll stay right here.
Stop the train! Dad, Dad, it's okay.
Stop the train! Dad! Stop the train! Dad, it's okay, she's going to be okay.
Oh! Remember the subway rules.
The subway rules.
Oh! Remember the subway rules, it's going to be-- Dad! Goddamn it! Dad, it's gonna be okay.
Dad, stop.
It's gonna be okay.
Okay, she knows the subway rules.
We just went over them.
It's going to be okay.
As soon as the doors open, we have to run-- get off that train.
Fast.
What are we gonna do when we're-- we're gonna go up to the mezzanine, we're gonna go to the downtown side, we're gonna get on the first train coming back.
We're gonna have to come back downtown.
Okay? And then we have to go upstairs, we have to go outside, we have to cross Lexington, we have to go back downstairs and then we'll find Jane.
Come on, come on, come here, come here, come here.
Soon as these doors open, we're running, you understand? Running.
Got it.
Oh, Christ.
What is wrong with her? It's not her fault.
Come on, come on! Goddamn shit, goddamn shit, goddamn shit.
Shit, shit, shit You shouldn't curse in front of your daughter.
Shit! What? You're okay? Okay, love you, love you, love you.
Sorry.
Okay.
Yeah, it's fine, Dad.
Hey, are you okay? Are you lost? Well, my dad told me to stay here.
It was part of the subway rules.
Plus, this is all my dream, so everything is okay.
Your dream.
Let people off, let people off, please! Daddy, it worked and this is all part of my dream! No, this is not a dream, Jane! It's not a dream! This is real! People get hurt! It's a dangerous world! Kids get stolen! And they disappear forever, Jane! This is real! Bad things happen! You can't do something like that ever again! Just-- Dad, Dad.
It's enough.
No! It's enough.
Go ahead and cry, that's right! That's what you should be doing! No.
You should be scared and crying! Do you know what could have happened?! No! It's not okay! Never do something like that again! Never! Why did you do that?! Why did you do that, Jane?! I don't like this dream.
This is a bad dream.
No, it's not a good dream! You never do this again! This is a horrible dream.
Come on, we're taking a cab.
I'm taking you to your mom's.
Go, come on, come on.
Hey.
Mommy.
Hi.
Hi, Patrick.
Hi, Patrick.
Patrick.
Hi, Louie.
Hey, um something happened, we had a thing happen.
What happened? First of all, last night, Jane had a bad dream.
Yeah, she gets those.
No, so but then this morning, she says she's still dreaming.
Like she's saying how everything is part of her dream.
That, she's just being creative-- So then we're on the subway and right before the doors close-- The craziest lined up today And the thing that would please me Oh yeah baby I just want to know what to do 'Cause you-- Jane? Jane?! Stop, Jane.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa You tell me something right now.
Is this a dream? Are we in your dream right now? No, Mommy.
Is it true what your dad said, what you did on the subway? Yes, Mommy.
Sorry, Mommy.
You go to your room right now.
Okay.
Let's go, huh? Yeah.
Yeah Okay? Uh-huh.
All right, I'll talk to you later.
Uh-huh.
Yep.
Oh What happened? I don't-- I don't know.
What'd you do? I just pressed the elevator button.
Help! Someone's stuck.
Oh, shit.
Hey! Hello! Who's stuck in there? Help, I'm st-- Hello! I'm stuck! Who's in there? Okay, well, don't ring the bell no more.
Just hold on.
You hold on here.
Hello? Hello? Help! Uh, he's coming right back.
I'm afraid! You're fine.
No, I'm not fine.
I'm stuck.
Well, yeah.
You Hold this.
Hello? Can you get me out of here? No, not right now! Why not? I can't move this elevator.
I gotta call the fire department.
Can't you just get her out through-- No, no, no, no.
That's how you get cut in half, see? The elevator moves, and she gets out partway I seen a guy cut in half like a fish.
Hold on here.
I gotta go call fire Hello? Hello, is someone there? Uh, yeah, he's coming right back.
He's just calling the fire department.
Can you help me? I can't get you out of there.
But can you help me? How? I need my medication.
It's very important.
If-- if-- if you go to my apartment, it's 2B.
Can you help me? Okay.
I will give you my keys.
And, um, if you go in my kitchen, on the counter is my pills.
Okay.
I need them now.
I'm sorry.
I'll be right back.
Pee, pee, pee, pee, pee pee, pee, pee, pee, pee And here's to you Mrs.
Pee-Pee Face I called the fire department! They're sending someone over! Please don't shout at me.
I'm not shouting! I'm talking loud enough so you can hear me in there! Oh, good, you're back.
Wha Oh, hello? Uh, hi, I got-- I got your pills.
Oh, thank you so much.
Okay.
God bless you.
All right, well, so you're okay now, right? Well It's awful being trapped in here alone.
Well, try to, uh, try not to think about it.
Try to think of something else.
You know, like pretend, uh you're in, uh, you're not stuck.
You're in a little waiting room with no chairs and no windows like on purpose.
You're very kind.
All right, well, he's gonna be back soon with the fire department.
Yeah.
All right, well, you don't have to stay here with me.
I'll be fine.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Okay.
Hey, by the way, there's a woman in your apartment.
She's asleep on the sofa.
Oh! That's my niece.
I did not know that she was home.
Oh, please, can you go and ask her to wait with me? Please? Uh, sure.
But she was sleeping.
Oh, for heaven's sake, wake her.
You still have my keys.
Yeah, I do.
Okay.
All right, I'll be right back.
Hello.
Hello, hello? Hello.
Hello.
Uh, hi.
You're kind of naked.
I don't want to touch you.
Hello, hello, come on.
Hello, hello, hello.
All right.
No, no, no! Your aunt! Your aunt is on the elevator! Your aunt is in the elevator! Your aunt is in the elevator! Oh Oh Mother's tits.
Take advantage of Bryn Jorner Cable's newest deals, including free HBO for only $20 a day and a sports package with none of your favorite sports.
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Oh, hi.
Uh, come, uh Hi.
I'm sorry, um Oh, oh.
Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no.
Nah, just don't-- don't worry about it.
Don't, uh No, no, it's fine, it's fine.
It's all right.
It's okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, that was crazy.
You know, it's, uh That's nice, don't worry about it.
Thank you.
Oh, is that For me? Can you-- come in, come on in.
Uh Come on inside, please.
Okay.
Come on in.
Yeah, this is my apartment.
Come on in.
Ah.
Yes.
This is really good.
It's yummy.
Yum-yum.
Yum-yum! It's delicious.
It's mmm.
You don't want it? No, no, this is for me.
No, I'm not serving you any-- Yeah, this is more for me.
Yeah, here we go.
You know what? Yeah, look, let's just-- let's just go ahead and Let's just eat.
Oh my God.
I love, uh women.
Not all of them.
But usually when I love somebody, it's a woman.
How do you know you love somebody? That's a good question.
How do you know you love somebody? You know you love somebody when you share your innermost secret racism with them.
That's that's when you really know when you finally come out and say, "All right, there's this black guy at work "and, uh Actually, you know what, both black guys at work.
" I have two daughters, so I'm raising two future women, you know? Maybe.
I mean, one of them might be a guy later.
It's possible.
It could happen.
Someday, one of my daughters will say, "Dad, I'm really a guy.
" And I'll be like, "All right, well, "let's get you a dick.
"Let's get you a dick, honey.
"We're going to get you the nicest dick in town.
Nothing is too good for my little girl.
"
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, you okay? I'm having a scary dream.
No, no, no, no, no.
You're awake now, it's over now.
It's over.
No, I'm still dreaming.
But it's better now.
Okay.
Okay.
There you go.
Daddy? Shh Yeah.
I'm having a nice dream now.
Okay, good.
Keep having a nice dream, okay? Yeah.
You promise? Got it.
Okay, good.
Goodnight.
Goodnight, Daddy.
Love you.
Dad, I forgot my science notebook at your house.
Okay.
No, but I need it and I'm going to Mom's house.
I'll get it to your mom later.
What? Daddy.
Girls, do we know the subway rules? Daddy.
Yes.
Do we remember the subway rules? What are they? Daddy-- Let's hear the subway-- just a second-- let's hear-- - I'm still dreaming.
- Okay, come here, come here, come here, come here.
Daddy, I'm still dreaming.
What? I'm still dreaming.
This is all my dream, it's really cool.
It's almost like real life.
Okay, the subway rules.
If you get on the train-- Wait, wait, wait.
But-- okay, if you get-- Let's say you get on the train-- Let's say I get on the train and you don't, you get somehow stuck on the platform by yourself, what do you do? Then we-- we stay right there and then you'll come back to us.
That's right.
Stay in that exact spot.
You stay in that exact spot and you don't move, right? Right.
Bingo.
Okay, what if you got on the train and somehow I don't get on the train? When you're alone on the train, what do you do? We get off at the next spot.
At the next stop.
At the next stop.
What do you do there? And then we stay there and we don't let anyone move us and we stay right there until you come get us.
Ahh! Come on.
This dream's cool.
Ah, it's coming, come on.
Ba-ba-ba, come on.
Go, go, go, come on.
Jane, you're with me? Yeah.
Let's go.
Get on, get on, get on, get on.
Okay.
So what do you need from your mom's house? You need your science notebook.
I need my science notebook and I need it for Wednesday.
So if I get it to you tomorrow, that's okay? Yeah.
Do you need anything else? No, that's it.
I need it by Wednesday.
By Wednesday? So if I get it to you tomorrow, that's okay? Yeah.
Stand clear of the closing doors, please.
Jane, Jane! It's okay, Daddy.
Jane! Stop the train! Open the door! It's okay, Daddy.
I'm going to stay right here.
- Jane, Jane! - I'll stay right here.
It's my dream.
Jane! Jane! I'll stay right here.
Stop the train! Dad, Dad, it's okay.
Stop the train! Dad! Stop the train! Dad, it's okay, she's going to be okay.
Oh! Remember the subway rules.
The subway rules.
Oh! Remember the subway rules, it's going to be-- Dad! Goddamn it! Dad, it's gonna be okay.
Dad, stop.
It's gonna be okay.
Okay, she knows the subway rules.
We just went over them.
It's going to be okay.
As soon as the doors open, we have to run-- get off that train.
Fast.
What are we gonna do when we're-- we're gonna go up to the mezzanine, we're gonna go to the downtown side, we're gonna get on the first train coming back.
We're gonna have to come back downtown.
Okay? And then we have to go upstairs, we have to go outside, we have to cross Lexington, we have to go back downstairs and then we'll find Jane.
Come on, come on, come here, come here, come here.
Soon as these doors open, we're running, you understand? Running.
Got it.
Oh, Christ.
What is wrong with her? It's not her fault.
Come on, come on! Goddamn shit, goddamn shit, goddamn shit.
Shit, shit, shit You shouldn't curse in front of your daughter.
Shit! What? You're okay? Okay, love you, love you, love you.
Sorry.
Okay.
Yeah, it's fine, Dad.
Hey, are you okay? Are you lost? Well, my dad told me to stay here.
It was part of the subway rules.
Plus, this is all my dream, so everything is okay.
Your dream.
Let people off, let people off, please! Daddy, it worked and this is all part of my dream! No, this is not a dream, Jane! It's not a dream! This is real! People get hurt! It's a dangerous world! Kids get stolen! And they disappear forever, Jane! This is real! Bad things happen! You can't do something like that ever again! Just-- Dad, Dad.
It's enough.
No! It's enough.
Go ahead and cry, that's right! That's what you should be doing! No.
You should be scared and crying! Do you know what could have happened?! No! It's not okay! Never do something like that again! Never! Why did you do that?! Why did you do that, Jane?! I don't like this dream.
This is a bad dream.
No, it's not a good dream! You never do this again! This is a horrible dream.
Come on, we're taking a cab.
I'm taking you to your mom's.
Go, come on, come on.
Hey.
Mommy.
Hi.
Hi, Patrick.
Hi, Patrick.
Patrick.
Hi, Louie.
Hey, um something happened, we had a thing happen.
What happened? First of all, last night, Jane had a bad dream.
Yeah, she gets those.
No, so but then this morning, she says she's still dreaming.
Like she's saying how everything is part of her dream.
That, she's just being creative-- So then we're on the subway and right before the doors close-- The craziest lined up today And the thing that would please me Oh yeah baby I just want to know what to do 'Cause you-- Jane? Jane?! Stop, Jane.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa You tell me something right now.
Is this a dream? Are we in your dream right now? No, Mommy.
Is it true what your dad said, what you did on the subway? Yes, Mommy.
Sorry, Mommy.
You go to your room right now.
Okay.
Let's go, huh? Yeah.
Yeah Okay? Uh-huh.
All right, I'll talk to you later.
Uh-huh.
Yep.
Oh What happened? I don't-- I don't know.
What'd you do? I just pressed the elevator button.
Help! Someone's stuck.
Oh, shit.
Hey! Hello! Who's stuck in there? Help, I'm st-- Hello! I'm stuck! Who's in there? Okay, well, don't ring the bell no more.
Just hold on.
You hold on here.
Hello? Hello? Help! Uh, he's coming right back.
I'm afraid! You're fine.
No, I'm not fine.
I'm stuck.
Well, yeah.
You Hold this.
Hello? Can you get me out of here? No, not right now! Why not? I can't move this elevator.
I gotta call the fire department.
Can't you just get her out through-- No, no, no, no.
That's how you get cut in half, see? The elevator moves, and she gets out partway I seen a guy cut in half like a fish.
Hold on here.
I gotta go call fire Hello? Hello, is someone there? Uh, yeah, he's coming right back.
He's just calling the fire department.
Can you help me? I can't get you out of there.
But can you help me? How? I need my medication.
It's very important.
If-- if-- if you go to my apartment, it's 2B.
Can you help me? Okay.
I will give you my keys.
And, um, if you go in my kitchen, on the counter is my pills.
Okay.
I need them now.
I'm sorry.
I'll be right back.
Pee, pee, pee, pee, pee pee, pee, pee, pee, pee And here's to you Mrs.
Pee-Pee Face I called the fire department! They're sending someone over! Please don't shout at me.
I'm not shouting! I'm talking loud enough so you can hear me in there! Oh, good, you're back.
Wha Oh, hello? Uh, hi, I got-- I got your pills.
Oh, thank you so much.
Okay.
God bless you.
All right, well, so you're okay now, right? Well It's awful being trapped in here alone.
Well, try to, uh, try not to think about it.
Try to think of something else.
You know, like pretend, uh you're in, uh, you're not stuck.
You're in a little waiting room with no chairs and no windows like on purpose.
You're very kind.
All right, well, he's gonna be back soon with the fire department.
Yeah.
All right, well, you don't have to stay here with me.
I'll be fine.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Okay.
Hey, by the way, there's a woman in your apartment.
She's asleep on the sofa.
Oh! That's my niece.
I did not know that she was home.
Oh, please, can you go and ask her to wait with me? Please? Uh, sure.
But she was sleeping.
Oh, for heaven's sake, wake her.
You still have my keys.
Yeah, I do.
Okay.
All right, I'll be right back.
Hello.
Hello, hello? Hello.
Hello.
Uh, hi.
You're kind of naked.
I don't want to touch you.
Hello, hello, come on.
Hello, hello, hello.
All right.
No, no, no! Your aunt! Your aunt is on the elevator! Your aunt is in the elevator! Your aunt is in the elevator! Oh Oh Mother's tits.
Take advantage of Bryn Jorner Cable's newest deals, including free HBO for only $20 a day and a sports package with none of your favorite sports.
Here at Slime Dormer Cable, we know you have no choice in cable providers, so we appreciate your choosing us.
Your hold time may be up to 7,000 seconds.
Oh, hi.
Uh, come, uh Hi.
I'm sorry, um Oh, oh.
Oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no.
Nah, just don't-- don't worry about it.
Don't, uh No, no, it's fine, it's fine.
It's all right.
It's okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, that was crazy.
You know, it's, uh That's nice, don't worry about it.
Thank you.
Oh, is that For me? Can you-- come in, come on in.
Uh Come on inside, please.
Okay.
Come on in.
Yeah, this is my apartment.
Come on in.
Ah.
Yes.
This is really good.
It's yummy.
Yum-yum.
Yum-yum! It's delicious.
It's mmm.
You don't want it? No, no, this is for me.
No, I'm not serving you any-- Yeah, this is more for me.
Yeah, here we go.
You know what? Yeah, look, let's just-- let's just go ahead and Let's just eat.
Oh my God.
I love, uh women.
Not all of them.
But usually when I love somebody, it's a woman.
How do you know you love somebody? That's a good question.
How do you know you love somebody? You know you love somebody when you share your innermost secret racism with them.
That's that's when you really know when you finally come out and say, "All right, there's this black guy at work "and, uh Actually, you know what, both black guys at work.
" I have two daughters, so I'm raising two future women, you know? Maybe.
I mean, one of them might be a guy later.
It's possible.
It could happen.
Someday, one of my daughters will say, "Dad, I'm really a guy.
" And I'll be like, "All right, well, "let's get you a dick.
"Let's get you a dick, honey.
"We're going to get you the nicest dick in town.
Nothing is too good for my little girl.
"