Comic Book Men s04e05 Episode Script
BronyCon
Let's say Yoda comes to the stash.
He needs a new jedi apprentice.
He's like, "me look for jedi, I am.
" You sound like Jar Jar.
- Okay, continue.
- All right.
So what do you offer Yoda that he's gonna pick you, Mike? I'm in shape for my age.
Will Yoda go, "me not looking for senior citizen"? You could do a lot worse.
How about that? That's my pitch to him.
What are you offering Yoda? The problem is, Jedis are schooled to hold back their emotions, not be emotional.
That's the problem? Bro, there's no one less emotional than you.
Like, literally, C.
3.
P.
O is more emotional than him.
You might be the strongest candidate, but look at this guy right here.
He looks like a jedi.
Look at that.
That's zen.
But there would be a greater than 50% chance of me going to the dark side almost 100%.
Ming, I think you're probably the jedi material at the table.
Come on, jedi.
Let's go fold some shirts.
Can I use the force? Hello.
Welcome to another episode of Comic Book Men, the only show that did a threesome with both aunt may and Ant-Man.
I'm your host, Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Okay, boys, what blew your minds this week? Every day, you know, kind of reminded that it's a new world out here.
Legalized marijuana, gay marriage what are we talking about here? You've got those two, but at the top of the list for me, it's got to be the Brony Movement.
Of course.
What a deep social impact this has made.
Hey, guys, I got some pony comics on my hands I thought you might be interested in.
Pony comics.
Actually, this says Transformers.
It's a Botcon exclusive.
Botcon's, like, a Transformers convention? Yeah, last year, they had a my little pony comic, and it was a crossover.
It had pinkie pie and Optimus Prime on it.
This year they went with DJ Pon-3 and Soundwave.
And they decided to put it on a Transformers comic instead since it was BotCon.
who are between ages, like, 13 and 25.
I, myself, am one.
Like, I go to BronyCon, - and you see these people with - BronyCon? - BronyCon, yes.
- What's that? It's the biggest convention in the world for bronies to meet, like, buy, sell, trade.
There's cosplay contests, lots of really cool stuff.
Those people who have no idea about this subculture of ponies, they assume that this is geared towards a five-to a ten-year-old child, right? - I'll grant you that.
- It's fair, right? I grant you that.
I have devoted a very generous space to the pony items in the stash right at the front of the store where the kids walk in.
$2.
99, $3.
99 comic book.
It's an easy sell.
are the parents of the little kids coming in.
This isn't aimed for the little kids.
No, it's not.
It's aimed toward the adults with the big wallets.
We don't sell high-ticket items featuring ponies though.
Maybe we should think about it.
Last year, we had a guy come in.
You know, he introduced us into the concept of the brony.
Is that a tattoo of a pony on your arm? - Correct, sir.
- That's crazy.
Do you guys know what a brony is? Bronies? Perhaps a member of the herd yourselves? Anybody? I don't think it's any secret that Walt's maybe not the most open guy out there, that anything that may seem strange or weird to him, you know, he immediately writes off.
So it sounds like you are maybe at best bro-curious, but he is bro-committed.
So what are you looking to get for it? Um, looking to get maybe $150 for this pair? - $150 for the pair of these? - Yeah.
I mean, did this sell that well? This was a con exclusive, and it was limited to, like, 750 copies.
I just don't think it's it's for the stash, you know? It's kind of a big-ticket item that I just don't feel that we could flip.
- All right.
- Sorry.
- Thank you anyways.
- All right.
- Thanks, man.
- Thank you.
You have a good day.
Brohoof.
Brohoof.
He brings up an interesting point.
What interesting point does he bring up? There are guys out there who will spend money on this stuff.
There's so much merchandise.
It's it's crazy.
And costume contest.
Who would want to do that? There's no way I'm going to a BronyCon.
Why? Will you enter the cosplay contest? Right? You're gonna be disguised half the time.
A little vaudevillian action.
The two-person horse.
Oh.
To be honest, I've always wanted to dress in one of those vaudevillian horse costumes the two-man horse costume.
You know I love to kick it old-school, um - in a horse costume? - That's really old-school.
I like to kick it like in the 1910s When two men in a horse suit was entertainment.
Doing the Charleston.
If I go, you got to be the horse's ass.
I mean, if that gets you down there that I got to be a horse's ass then I would do it.
- All right, I'm in.
- I would do it.
But if we're dressing up, you guys got to dress up too.
Oh, something other than this? Yeah.
Let's do it then.
Well, I would say we're not in Kansas anymore, but that'd be an understatement.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi.
Um, I have some original comic art that you might be interested in.
Oh, my gosh.
This is a Jerry Robinson Batman sketch and a phantom sketch.
That is so cool.
Where did you get these? Actually, they were my brother's, and they've been passed down.
They've been in our family for about 60 years now.
He got them at a U.
S.
O.
show in Korea in 1955 or '56.
They sent comic book artists to entertain the troops back then? - Yes.
- Wow.
Who knew that the U.
S.
O.
was like, "let's bring comic book artists out to entertain the troops"? It's amazing, and after their little demo, they would go into the audience and do some sketches for the troops.
What a lucky troop is this? Like, over here, they've got jayne Mansfield, and over here, they've got a guy drawing pictures.
We want Betty grable! Like, "you got Bob Kane.
" It says, "hello, Roy and Joyce!" I am the Joyce.
- Oh, you're Joyce? - Okay.
"Brother Fred tells me here in Korea what swell kids you are.
" Oh, that's nice.
I've found a picture in his belongings of them actually on the stage at the fort.
- That is so cool.
- It's hard to see.
But, yeah, it looks like he's drawing a Batman.
That's got to be Jerry Robinson.
Don't see a lot of Jerry Robinson artwork come through the doors.
Almost never.
And the phantom.
He was like a superhero before superheroes were superheroes.
- Based in the jungles.
- Mm-hmm.
He was Batman, but set in the jungle.
But Wilson McCoy not that familiar with that artist.
- Jerry Robinson big name.
- Yeah.
Jerry Robinson is not drawing any more Batmans, so this is rare.
Think about it one of Batman's baby daddies guy responsible for some of the best things about the Batman mythos Robin, the Joker - Mm-hmm.
- Don't forget Alfred.
Alfred! That without Alfred, there is no Batman.
He's a dude alone in a cave, and people feel sorry for him.
Any idea what you're looking to get for both of them today? I was thinking about $850.
Is there any chance that you would take, um $600 for for the pair? We're kind of far apart.
How about $800? I could do 700 if, you know you're at 800.
I think so.
Yeah, I think my brother would be satisfied.
Awesome.
I got 100, 200, 300, 400, and 700.
That's great.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
You can't deny it, man.
Well, I would say we're not in Kansas anymore, but that'd be an understatement.
No, I mean, does it look that weird, or does this remind you of something? Yeah, it does remind me of something, my worst nightmare.
Come on, it's like Comic-Con, man.
Look at you got vendors.
You've got people in costume.
I can't deny that.
There is there does seem to be some commerce going on.
That guy was right.
Look at all these people.
There's got to be like 10,000 people here.
So we get down there, and I'm I'm definitely feeling a little self-conscious.
There's way more people than I assumed would be there, and I don't know if I want to be spotted down at BronyCon.
You were nervous? I couldn't tell.
You were scaring away people the way you were dressed.
He had the hoodie up, and you were wearing sunglasses.
Like, you looked like the frickin' unabomber.
He did.
He did.
He had a manifesto under his arm.
I mean, there is a lot of merchandise, right? - Yeah.
- Look at this thing.
Look at how huge it is.
You sell all those, that's bucks, man.
My niece loves this stuff.
Twilight sparkle, rainbow dash, applejack, cutie marks.
So what's this guy do? She works at the apple farm, man.
Yeah, she's got an apple farm.
Rainbow dash prides herself on being the fastest pony there is.
What's that purple one? That's twilight sparkle.
She reports to Princess Celestia, you know the whole "friendship is magic.
" You know, she how do you know so much about this? - I have a daughter.
- She's into this? She's into this.
Yeah Yeah, little girls and middle-aged men really dig it.
All right, well, we've got a couple hours before the cosplay contest.
- Let's do a little exploring.
- Let's go.
What's up, man? Where the mares be at? This is a weird one, man, but throughout all of literature, TV, movies, pop culture, comic books favorite horse? Hands-down, silver.
Ah, the lone ranger's horse.
It's his Batmobile.
"Hi-ho, silver," right there in the rally cry.
Zap? I'm gonna go with Pegasus from clash of the titans.
Excellent poll, and beyond clash of the titans, just in Greek mythology in general.
I don't count that.
You're like, "I don't like his early work.
I like the more recent stuff.
" What about you, Bry? - I'd have to go with Mr.
Ed.
- Why? Why Mr.
Ed? - Just because he's so well-known? - He's popular.
I like to jump on the bandwagon of anything that's popular.
You are.
You follow every trend.
People love him, and I love how he relentlessly breaks his master's balls.
He's like, "oh, wilbur.
" Excellent, excellent poll.
Ming? I'm gonna go with trigger from Roy Rogers.
That's that's old-school, baby! Kids, I'm picking a horse even your grandfather don't remember.
So we walked around the con for a couple hours, but then it was time for the costume contest.
What's the expectation? What do we take? - We're taking - What's up, man? Where the mares be at? Awesome, huh? How'd you feel in that costume? I-I thought we looked damn good, man, right? That wasn't even acting.
And for the first time since the turn of the century, and I mean the 20th century, two men got into one horse costume and made funnies.
He looks like buffalo bill and John Wayne Gacy had a love child.
I'm just gonna walk out to the front row.
- Why are you dressed like that? - I'm Derpy Hooves, baby.
- Yeah, you're Derpy, all right.
- That's crazy.
In the series, someone Drew one of the ponies with one eye looking this way and one eye looking that way.
And I guess it led people to say, like, you know, she was special needs or whatever.
And they named her Derpy Hooves.
Hasbro didn't like that, so they had the name changed to ditzy Doo.
Because, you know, she's ditzy, you know? Right, right, right.
And to me, I'm like, all right.
Well, special-needs people have their very own pony they can identify with, and hasbro tried to take it away, so I took it back.
Thumbed my nose at hasbro.
Look at Mike, though.
You don't look like a pony to me.
No, I'm the veterinarian to the ponies.
I'm keeping it real.
Keeping it real disgusting.
You could have been rainbow dash.
You could have been twilight sparkle.
You could have been, like, applejack, but but he didn't have any of that stuff laying around the house.
- This he did.
- Yeah.
Yeah, you really did look like you just left a slaughterhouse.
I was a little gruesome.
You know, because not all ponies are gonna make it.
You know, some have to be put down every once in a while.
Why'd you take it there? Yeah, that was weird, Mike.
Oh, it's time, boys.
All right, come on.
Get under there.
Whoo, ooh, ooh, ooh.
- All set? - Yeah, I'm good.
All right.
Let's walk.
No, let's strut.
Uh, wait a second.
So if everybody's at BronyCon, who's running the store? - Sunday Jeff and cousin Johnny.
- Really? Okay, now, Sunday Jeff everyone who knows the show knows Sunday Jeff.
He works on Sundays, hence the name.
But cousin Johnny is just my cousin, Johnny Johnny Willyung, who has been in some of the flicks.
But you put him behind the camera? What was that like? It was kind of an S.
O.
S.
situation.
All hands on deck.
Did you care? I mean, we were going to a BronyCon.
- All set.
- All right.
- Thank you very much.
- No problem.
Take care now.
You have a nice day.
- You too, now.
- How's it going? - How you doing, buddy? - Good.
You guys do monster games? Oh, yes.
You might want to check this out.
It's a vintage mattel Godzilla game from 1978.
- There you go.
- Wow.
- Sharp.
- It's pretty cool.
So why don't we take it out and I'll show you? Oh, sweet.
Is that cool? Sure.
Is this complete, or no? It's missing a couple of the spaceships.
But it's complete enough to play.
Lucky seven.
I'll put one down.
You put one down.
Yeah, there you go.
Then I'll go.
And you get eight, so I'll go eight.
And here comes Godzilla.
So you hear the roar? And you keep going until there's one ship left, and whoever's ship that is, then that's the winner.
Not to burst your bubble I'm bored already.
- What's the next game you got? - This is awesomeness, dude.
- Oh, come on.
- It is different.
I mean, this is just I'm surprised it actually caught it in its mouth - Yeah, yeah.
See? - Being this old of a toy.
And he roared.
That, I think, is the coolest thing about it.
- So it's good times.
- All right.
- Now the important question.
- Yeah.
How much you looking to get for it? Uh, I was thinking 200.
- 200? - Yeah.
- Wow.
- 200? I mean, honestly, I don't think this is really a piece for the stash.
Okay.
But tell you what I'm gonna do.
It's a piece for me.
However, $200You're not gonna get from me either.
Dude, it roars.
Yeah, but, you know, I can roar too, and it's not gonna be $200.
I would go 75 on it, for me personally.
Can you do $175? Nah, that's still too much.
I mean, the best I'd probably be able to give you is a hundred bucks.
Mmm.
Nah, it's gotta be gotta be that or nothing.
All right, well, John, looks like you ain't coming over to my house and playing Godzilla.
- It's a cool game too.
- Well, thank you for your time.
- I appreciate it.
- Yeah, sure.
- Thanks for stopping by.
- Thank you, man.
- Was good meeting you guys.
- Cool piece.
Appreciate it.
Thank you.
You all ready to see some cosplays? Ditzy Doo never, Derpy forever! You all ready to see some, uh, cosplays? BronyCon 2014, it is time to get the cosplay contest started.
Let's hear it! We have Vladimir cosplaying as Fluttershy.
Next up is John as twilight sparkle.
We have Robert cosplaying as DJ Dischord.
So the brony cosplay contest begins, and it's just a ton of bronies going out on stage and strutting their stuff.
Walt and Ming as twilight stash.
Well, this is one for the books.
I like that they borrowed Ronald McDonald's hair.
I heard after this event, they're providing pony rides outside the door.
Oh! I thought he just had four legs! The crowd went nuts when we walked out there.
I thought they were gonna storm the stage.
Everything old is new again! I mean, we were I mean, I'm not gonna lie.
I stayed out there a little bit extra longer because, I mean, they wanted more.
They wanted more two-stepping.
Took another victory lap, - did you? - Yeah.
He's like, "now I know how Bono feels when he steps out on that stage.
" Everyone loves him.
Next up is Mike Zapcic as Dr.
Otto Von gelding.
- Ladies.
- That's not even pony-related.
Is that some new villain in season five or something? You're not even from the show! Security! I think we got to get a disqualification here.
Yeah? Oh Remember to spay and neuter your ponies, people, or I'll do it for you.
Sorry about that.
I give points for the creativity of not just going as a horse but going as a character that doesn't even exist in pony world.
- Thank you.
- They kind of booed you - when you walked out.
- Yeah.
- Did they really? - Yeah.
They're like, "why the blood? Friendship is magic, not murder.
" The most hated contestant at any brony function ever.
Definitely the cutest Derpy I've ever seen, Bryan Johnson as Derpy Hooves! Whoa.
Look at that.
- Thank you.
- All right, Derpy.
Whoa! Ditzy Doo never, Derpy forever! I think my dad owns the same pair of sweatpants.
You were the only Derpy Hooves that looked like you walked out of a nightmare though.
- I mean, you were literally - I'd be better, like.
I'm a horse, I'm a horse.
I'm a big, bad horse.
I was the belle of the ball.
At the end of this costume contest, did we have any winners? And I use that term loosely.
If you're asking if any of us made it to the winner's circle, the answer is no.
Aww.
All right, we didn't win, but, you know, we put in a good effort, and I mean, look at us.
We look we look awesome.
I think with a little more practice, a little more time, we'll come get them back next year.
- Yeah, we got robbed.
- You're right, man.
I don't know what happened, man.
I don't I can't explain it.
I thought we were shoo-ins.
Mm-hmm.
Or shoe-ins, if you will.
Aw, man, and that's gonna wrap it up.
For another edition of Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Always keep your cutie marks clean, kids.
Good night.
He needs a new jedi apprentice.
He's like, "me look for jedi, I am.
" You sound like Jar Jar.
- Okay, continue.
- All right.
So what do you offer Yoda that he's gonna pick you, Mike? I'm in shape for my age.
Will Yoda go, "me not looking for senior citizen"? You could do a lot worse.
How about that? That's my pitch to him.
What are you offering Yoda? The problem is, Jedis are schooled to hold back their emotions, not be emotional.
That's the problem? Bro, there's no one less emotional than you.
Like, literally, C.
3.
P.
O is more emotional than him.
You might be the strongest candidate, but look at this guy right here.
He looks like a jedi.
Look at that.
That's zen.
But there would be a greater than 50% chance of me going to the dark side almost 100%.
Ming, I think you're probably the jedi material at the table.
Come on, jedi.
Let's go fold some shirts.
Can I use the force? Hello.
Welcome to another episode of Comic Book Men, the only show that did a threesome with both aunt may and Ant-Man.
I'm your host, Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Okay, boys, what blew your minds this week? Every day, you know, kind of reminded that it's a new world out here.
Legalized marijuana, gay marriage what are we talking about here? You've got those two, but at the top of the list for me, it's got to be the Brony Movement.
Of course.
What a deep social impact this has made.
Hey, guys, I got some pony comics on my hands I thought you might be interested in.
Pony comics.
Actually, this says Transformers.
It's a Botcon exclusive.
Botcon's, like, a Transformers convention? Yeah, last year, they had a my little pony comic, and it was a crossover.
It had pinkie pie and Optimus Prime on it.
This year they went with DJ Pon-3 and Soundwave.
And they decided to put it on a Transformers comic instead since it was BotCon.
who are between ages, like, 13 and 25.
I, myself, am one.
Like, I go to BronyCon, - and you see these people with - BronyCon? - BronyCon, yes.
- What's that? It's the biggest convention in the world for bronies to meet, like, buy, sell, trade.
There's cosplay contests, lots of really cool stuff.
Those people who have no idea about this subculture of ponies, they assume that this is geared towards a five-to a ten-year-old child, right? - I'll grant you that.
- It's fair, right? I grant you that.
I have devoted a very generous space to the pony items in the stash right at the front of the store where the kids walk in.
$2.
99, $3.
99 comic book.
It's an easy sell.
are the parents of the little kids coming in.
This isn't aimed for the little kids.
No, it's not.
It's aimed toward the adults with the big wallets.
We don't sell high-ticket items featuring ponies though.
Maybe we should think about it.
Last year, we had a guy come in.
You know, he introduced us into the concept of the brony.
Is that a tattoo of a pony on your arm? - Correct, sir.
- That's crazy.
Do you guys know what a brony is? Bronies? Perhaps a member of the herd yourselves? Anybody? I don't think it's any secret that Walt's maybe not the most open guy out there, that anything that may seem strange or weird to him, you know, he immediately writes off.
So it sounds like you are maybe at best bro-curious, but he is bro-committed.
So what are you looking to get for it? Um, looking to get maybe $150 for this pair? - $150 for the pair of these? - Yeah.
I mean, did this sell that well? This was a con exclusive, and it was limited to, like, 750 copies.
I just don't think it's it's for the stash, you know? It's kind of a big-ticket item that I just don't feel that we could flip.
- All right.
- Sorry.
- Thank you anyways.
- All right.
- Thanks, man.
- Thank you.
You have a good day.
Brohoof.
Brohoof.
He brings up an interesting point.
What interesting point does he bring up? There are guys out there who will spend money on this stuff.
There's so much merchandise.
It's it's crazy.
And costume contest.
Who would want to do that? There's no way I'm going to a BronyCon.
Why? Will you enter the cosplay contest? Right? You're gonna be disguised half the time.
A little vaudevillian action.
The two-person horse.
Oh.
To be honest, I've always wanted to dress in one of those vaudevillian horse costumes the two-man horse costume.
You know I love to kick it old-school, um - in a horse costume? - That's really old-school.
I like to kick it like in the 1910s When two men in a horse suit was entertainment.
Doing the Charleston.
If I go, you got to be the horse's ass.
I mean, if that gets you down there that I got to be a horse's ass then I would do it.
- All right, I'm in.
- I would do it.
But if we're dressing up, you guys got to dress up too.
Oh, something other than this? Yeah.
Let's do it then.
Well, I would say we're not in Kansas anymore, but that'd be an understatement.
- Hi, guys.
- Hi.
Um, I have some original comic art that you might be interested in.
Oh, my gosh.
This is a Jerry Robinson Batman sketch and a phantom sketch.
That is so cool.
Where did you get these? Actually, they were my brother's, and they've been passed down.
They've been in our family for about 60 years now.
He got them at a U.
S.
O.
show in Korea in 1955 or '56.
They sent comic book artists to entertain the troops back then? - Yes.
- Wow.
Who knew that the U.
S.
O.
was like, "let's bring comic book artists out to entertain the troops"? It's amazing, and after their little demo, they would go into the audience and do some sketches for the troops.
What a lucky troop is this? Like, over here, they've got jayne Mansfield, and over here, they've got a guy drawing pictures.
We want Betty grable! Like, "you got Bob Kane.
" It says, "hello, Roy and Joyce!" I am the Joyce.
- Oh, you're Joyce? - Okay.
"Brother Fred tells me here in Korea what swell kids you are.
" Oh, that's nice.
I've found a picture in his belongings of them actually on the stage at the fort.
- That is so cool.
- It's hard to see.
But, yeah, it looks like he's drawing a Batman.
That's got to be Jerry Robinson.
Don't see a lot of Jerry Robinson artwork come through the doors.
Almost never.
And the phantom.
He was like a superhero before superheroes were superheroes.
- Based in the jungles.
- Mm-hmm.
He was Batman, but set in the jungle.
But Wilson McCoy not that familiar with that artist.
- Jerry Robinson big name.
- Yeah.
Jerry Robinson is not drawing any more Batmans, so this is rare.
Think about it one of Batman's baby daddies guy responsible for some of the best things about the Batman mythos Robin, the Joker - Mm-hmm.
- Don't forget Alfred.
Alfred! That without Alfred, there is no Batman.
He's a dude alone in a cave, and people feel sorry for him.
Any idea what you're looking to get for both of them today? I was thinking about $850.
Is there any chance that you would take, um $600 for for the pair? We're kind of far apart.
How about $800? I could do 700 if, you know you're at 800.
I think so.
Yeah, I think my brother would be satisfied.
Awesome.
I got 100, 200, 300, 400, and 700.
That's great.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
You can't deny it, man.
Well, I would say we're not in Kansas anymore, but that'd be an understatement.
No, I mean, does it look that weird, or does this remind you of something? Yeah, it does remind me of something, my worst nightmare.
Come on, it's like Comic-Con, man.
Look at you got vendors.
You've got people in costume.
I can't deny that.
There is there does seem to be some commerce going on.
That guy was right.
Look at all these people.
There's got to be like 10,000 people here.
So we get down there, and I'm I'm definitely feeling a little self-conscious.
There's way more people than I assumed would be there, and I don't know if I want to be spotted down at BronyCon.
You were nervous? I couldn't tell.
You were scaring away people the way you were dressed.
He had the hoodie up, and you were wearing sunglasses.
Like, you looked like the frickin' unabomber.
He did.
He did.
He had a manifesto under his arm.
I mean, there is a lot of merchandise, right? - Yeah.
- Look at this thing.
Look at how huge it is.
You sell all those, that's bucks, man.
My niece loves this stuff.
Twilight sparkle, rainbow dash, applejack, cutie marks.
So what's this guy do? She works at the apple farm, man.
Yeah, she's got an apple farm.
Rainbow dash prides herself on being the fastest pony there is.
What's that purple one? That's twilight sparkle.
She reports to Princess Celestia, you know the whole "friendship is magic.
" You know, she how do you know so much about this? - I have a daughter.
- She's into this? She's into this.
Yeah Yeah, little girls and middle-aged men really dig it.
All right, well, we've got a couple hours before the cosplay contest.
- Let's do a little exploring.
- Let's go.
What's up, man? Where the mares be at? This is a weird one, man, but throughout all of literature, TV, movies, pop culture, comic books favorite horse? Hands-down, silver.
Ah, the lone ranger's horse.
It's his Batmobile.
"Hi-ho, silver," right there in the rally cry.
Zap? I'm gonna go with Pegasus from clash of the titans.
Excellent poll, and beyond clash of the titans, just in Greek mythology in general.
I don't count that.
You're like, "I don't like his early work.
I like the more recent stuff.
" What about you, Bry? - I'd have to go with Mr.
Ed.
- Why? Why Mr.
Ed? - Just because he's so well-known? - He's popular.
I like to jump on the bandwagon of anything that's popular.
You are.
You follow every trend.
People love him, and I love how he relentlessly breaks his master's balls.
He's like, "oh, wilbur.
" Excellent, excellent poll.
Ming? I'm gonna go with trigger from Roy Rogers.
That's that's old-school, baby! Kids, I'm picking a horse even your grandfather don't remember.
So we walked around the con for a couple hours, but then it was time for the costume contest.
What's the expectation? What do we take? - We're taking - What's up, man? Where the mares be at? Awesome, huh? How'd you feel in that costume? I-I thought we looked damn good, man, right? That wasn't even acting.
And for the first time since the turn of the century, and I mean the 20th century, two men got into one horse costume and made funnies.
He looks like buffalo bill and John Wayne Gacy had a love child.
I'm just gonna walk out to the front row.
- Why are you dressed like that? - I'm Derpy Hooves, baby.
- Yeah, you're Derpy, all right.
- That's crazy.
In the series, someone Drew one of the ponies with one eye looking this way and one eye looking that way.
And I guess it led people to say, like, you know, she was special needs or whatever.
And they named her Derpy Hooves.
Hasbro didn't like that, so they had the name changed to ditzy Doo.
Because, you know, she's ditzy, you know? Right, right, right.
And to me, I'm like, all right.
Well, special-needs people have their very own pony they can identify with, and hasbro tried to take it away, so I took it back.
Thumbed my nose at hasbro.
Look at Mike, though.
You don't look like a pony to me.
No, I'm the veterinarian to the ponies.
I'm keeping it real.
Keeping it real disgusting.
You could have been rainbow dash.
You could have been twilight sparkle.
You could have been, like, applejack, but but he didn't have any of that stuff laying around the house.
- This he did.
- Yeah.
Yeah, you really did look like you just left a slaughterhouse.
I was a little gruesome.
You know, because not all ponies are gonna make it.
You know, some have to be put down every once in a while.
Why'd you take it there? Yeah, that was weird, Mike.
Oh, it's time, boys.
All right, come on.
Get under there.
Whoo, ooh, ooh, ooh.
- All set? - Yeah, I'm good.
All right.
Let's walk.
No, let's strut.
Uh, wait a second.
So if everybody's at BronyCon, who's running the store? - Sunday Jeff and cousin Johnny.
- Really? Okay, now, Sunday Jeff everyone who knows the show knows Sunday Jeff.
He works on Sundays, hence the name.
But cousin Johnny is just my cousin, Johnny Johnny Willyung, who has been in some of the flicks.
But you put him behind the camera? What was that like? It was kind of an S.
O.
S.
situation.
All hands on deck.
Did you care? I mean, we were going to a BronyCon.
- All set.
- All right.
- Thank you very much.
- No problem.
Take care now.
You have a nice day.
- You too, now.
- How's it going? - How you doing, buddy? - Good.
You guys do monster games? Oh, yes.
You might want to check this out.
It's a vintage mattel Godzilla game from 1978.
- There you go.
- Wow.
- Sharp.
- It's pretty cool.
So why don't we take it out and I'll show you? Oh, sweet.
Is that cool? Sure.
Is this complete, or no? It's missing a couple of the spaceships.
But it's complete enough to play.
Lucky seven.
I'll put one down.
You put one down.
Yeah, there you go.
Then I'll go.
And you get eight, so I'll go eight.
And here comes Godzilla.
So you hear the roar? And you keep going until there's one ship left, and whoever's ship that is, then that's the winner.
Not to burst your bubble I'm bored already.
- What's the next game you got? - This is awesomeness, dude.
- Oh, come on.
- It is different.
I mean, this is just I'm surprised it actually caught it in its mouth - Yeah, yeah.
See? - Being this old of a toy.
And he roared.
That, I think, is the coolest thing about it.
- So it's good times.
- All right.
- Now the important question.
- Yeah.
How much you looking to get for it? Uh, I was thinking 200.
- 200? - Yeah.
- Wow.
- 200? I mean, honestly, I don't think this is really a piece for the stash.
Okay.
But tell you what I'm gonna do.
It's a piece for me.
However, $200You're not gonna get from me either.
Dude, it roars.
Yeah, but, you know, I can roar too, and it's not gonna be $200.
I would go 75 on it, for me personally.
Can you do $175? Nah, that's still too much.
I mean, the best I'd probably be able to give you is a hundred bucks.
Mmm.
Nah, it's gotta be gotta be that or nothing.
All right, well, John, looks like you ain't coming over to my house and playing Godzilla.
- It's a cool game too.
- Well, thank you for your time.
- I appreciate it.
- Yeah, sure.
- Thanks for stopping by.
- Thank you, man.
- Was good meeting you guys.
- Cool piece.
Appreciate it.
Thank you.
You all ready to see some cosplays? Ditzy Doo never, Derpy forever! You all ready to see some, uh, cosplays? BronyCon 2014, it is time to get the cosplay contest started.
Let's hear it! We have Vladimir cosplaying as Fluttershy.
Next up is John as twilight sparkle.
We have Robert cosplaying as DJ Dischord.
So the brony cosplay contest begins, and it's just a ton of bronies going out on stage and strutting their stuff.
Walt and Ming as twilight stash.
Well, this is one for the books.
I like that they borrowed Ronald McDonald's hair.
I heard after this event, they're providing pony rides outside the door.
Oh! I thought he just had four legs! The crowd went nuts when we walked out there.
I thought they were gonna storm the stage.
Everything old is new again! I mean, we were I mean, I'm not gonna lie.
I stayed out there a little bit extra longer because, I mean, they wanted more.
They wanted more two-stepping.
Took another victory lap, - did you? - Yeah.
He's like, "now I know how Bono feels when he steps out on that stage.
" Everyone loves him.
Next up is Mike Zapcic as Dr.
Otto Von gelding.
- Ladies.
- That's not even pony-related.
Is that some new villain in season five or something? You're not even from the show! Security! I think we got to get a disqualification here.
Yeah? Oh Remember to spay and neuter your ponies, people, or I'll do it for you.
Sorry about that.
I give points for the creativity of not just going as a horse but going as a character that doesn't even exist in pony world.
- Thank you.
- They kind of booed you - when you walked out.
- Yeah.
- Did they really? - Yeah.
They're like, "why the blood? Friendship is magic, not murder.
" The most hated contestant at any brony function ever.
Definitely the cutest Derpy I've ever seen, Bryan Johnson as Derpy Hooves! Whoa.
Look at that.
- Thank you.
- All right, Derpy.
Whoa! Ditzy Doo never, Derpy forever! I think my dad owns the same pair of sweatpants.
You were the only Derpy Hooves that looked like you walked out of a nightmare though.
- I mean, you were literally - I'd be better, like.
I'm a horse, I'm a horse.
I'm a big, bad horse.
I was the belle of the ball.
At the end of this costume contest, did we have any winners? And I use that term loosely.
If you're asking if any of us made it to the winner's circle, the answer is no.
Aww.
All right, we didn't win, but, you know, we put in a good effort, and I mean, look at us.
We look we look awesome.
I think with a little more practice, a little more time, we'll come get them back next year.
- Yeah, we got robbed.
- You're right, man.
I don't know what happened, man.
I don't I can't explain it.
I thought we were shoo-ins.
Mm-hmm.
Or shoe-ins, if you will.
Aw, man, and that's gonna wrap it up.
For another edition of Comic Book Men.
I'm Kevin Smith.
- Bryan Johnson.
- Walt Flanagan.
- Mike Zapcic.
- Ming Chen.
Always keep your cutie marks clean, kids.
Good night.