Dawn of the Croods (2015) s04e06 Episode Script

All right, Cave of Secrets.
Settle this argument for us.
[Thunk.]
Huh.
[gasps.]
A-ha! See? The Tooth Beary is made up.
A bear owl doesn't take your old teeth while you sleep.
Your grandparents eat them to steal your youth.
[moaning and whimpering.]
[moaning.]
Bulk, uh, you okay? I tried to make it through the Tunnel of Terror.
The Tunnel of Terror? Looks like some kind of terrifying passageway.
- Possibly a tunnel? - Ooh! I always wanted to see that.
No, no, no, you can't handle it.
- Almost certainly not.
- Don't make me handle it.
- You know me well.
- Are you daring us to go in? No, I'm explicitly warning you not to.
It's too scary for anyone.
Oh, yeah? I'll take that dare.
We'll make it all the way through the tunnel, reading every story.
Right, guys? - She does not speak for us.
- Yes, I do.
[whimpering.]
Eh.
Peer pressure.
[gulps.]
I had no idea so many scary things happened in Ahhh! Valley.
- Wait.
Now I get our valley's name.
- Don't worry.
We got this.
Sure, but the curse of the cute monkhuahua? Maybe the monkhuahua's curse is it's too cute.
[gasps.]
Nope, no such luck.
[Lerk.]
It's the story of two best friends doing totally normal best friend stuff, like looking for food and never leaving each other's side ever forever ever.
[sighs.]
I'm so hungry, but there's no food anywhere! - [gasps.]
Ooh, except this guy.
- Aww! This little guy's so cute.
Yeah.
Mm.
Let's eat him.
But we're never supposed to eat cute animals, 'cause they're cute.
Yeah.
[chuckles.]
- Let's eat him.
- Eh? [gasps.]
A weird, hairy old sage.
Ye are correct, and I must warn ye, don't ye eat that monkhuahua.
- Why do you keep saying "ye"? - Ye should just go with it.
Okay, sure, but why shouldn't we eat him? And what's he gonna do, hurt us by making sweet eyes in our tum-tums? No, far worse than that.
- He'll curse ye! - [Lerk.]
Too late.
[belching.]
Don't say this weird, hairy old sage didn't warn ye.
A bunducky! Cute! - [growling.]
- Ooh.
Less cute, but still pretty cute.
This guy, heh, not so much.
It's like all the adorable animals aren't adorable anymore.
[gasps.]
Is this the curse? [buzzing.]
I think the curse is that they're trying to kill us! Yeah, I'd still snuggle you.
[chuckles.]
- [panting.]
How do we lift the curse? - There's no way to lift the curse.
- [both gasp.]
- Uh [clears throat.]
There's no way to lift the curse of my ongoing loneliness.
But ye can lift your curse by righting your original wrong.
It's actually pretty easy.
Ye just [coughs, gagging.]
[yells.]
The least that sage could've done is finish his thought before dying! Look, we're sorry we ate that cute monkhuahua, but we can't exactly un-eat it, can we? We can't un-eat it, but we can right that wrong.
From now on, we promise to only eat fruit.
[munching.]
[panting and gasping.]
Aaaah! Wow! That was so not scary, right? What? How are you not scared? Oh, come on! We're not gonna get eaten by a smash fruit.
They're harmless.
- It's got me! - [grunting.]
[panting.]
- You're safe now, Womp.
- Mm-hmm.
[nervous chuckle.]
- Let's just keep moving.
- Keep moving? No problem.
[whimpering.]
Come on, Eep, do we have to prove Bulk wrong? I can't take another story, and I can't stop reading every single one.
Evil ear worms, vile butt slugs, and [gasps.]
this is the worst yet.
Worse than killer fruit? [Thunk.]
It's the tale of a young boy's ill-fated romance with a monster.
Why, oh, why can't I find my one true [belching.]
[grunting.]
[gasps.]
You're as powerful as you are beautiful as you are cool.
Do I scare you? No, but I am scared of what I'm feeling for you.
Then let's go climb a really tall tree together.
Found my arm.
Wait, that's not mine.
How did you do that? And how did you stop that boulder before? I'm not like other girls.
I have powers, powers that come from [snarling.]
drinking the juice of cave people.
- Juice? Do you mean bl - Juice.
I said juice.
- Uh, are you gonna drink my juice? - [laughs.]
No, I already drank his.
Oh.
[chuckles.]
That's good.
Then let's just stare into each other's eyes until we're old enough to get married.
[evil chuckle, deepening.]
[clears throat.]
Sorry, I had some juice stuck in my throat, but that did the trick.
There's something off about that girl.
I don't trust anyone who can climb that high up a tree.
Plus, she drinks the blood of cave people.
She killed my boyfriend.
Yeah, that's bad, but it's really the whole tree-climbing thing that concerns me.
Still, ours is a civil society, so only one proper way to handle this.
[panting and yelling.]
They won't stop hunting me down until they break us up.
Then we'll keep running.
You and me, together, forever, because nothing will ever tear us ap Run! Run, girl whose name I never learned! [Thunk.]
And they never saw each other again.
[screams.]
Oh, man, what a terrifying story.
That boy will never get to be with that girl.
[gasps.]
Nothing's scarier than true love being denied.
Uh, I don't think that's the scary part.
Are you kidding? That boy will have to settle.
Settle! I don't know what you guys are talking about, okay? We're over halfway down this tunnel, and these stories aren't scary in the least.
What's this? A bug that lays killer eggs in your chest? [chuckles.]
Been there.
Focus.
Home stretch, and nothing has been that bad.
[gulps.]
Until now.
[Eep.]
This is the story of a young girl who dreamed of being a hunter, but when she finally got her chance, things took a turn for the scary.
I can't believe I finally get to be a part of the hunting pack! Well, we need the help.
Hunters have been mysteriously disappearing.
Some say a crazed bonker is hunting them, but I'm sure we won't make a series of poor decisions and get picked off one by one, right? Uh, sorry, what was that? Huh.
Where did our bait go? No time for questions about mysterious disappearance.
Need hunt now.
Need thrill of extinguishing life with own hands.
You got it, boss.
We are gonna go look for prey at Best Friends Point and maybe watch the sunset.
Me also need go, for very valid reason.
You no follow.
Let's switch spots.
- [thud.]
- [screaming.]
Better go see what that was, by myself, without my bonking rock.
Wait, wait, am I making a poor decision? Oh, I am.
Almost forgot my blindfold, so - [thump.]
- [groaning.]
[gasps.]
The crazed bonker must've got him! [clucking.]
- You missed that prey.
- Chickuna too easy hunt.
No fun.
Need bigger challenge.
[gasps.]
You're the crazed bonker! [panting and gasping.]
[whimpers and screams.]
Here's me! [screams.]
Please! Please, no! [gasps and groans.]
[gasps.]
You're alive! And you saved me from the crazed bonker.
Oh, she wasn't the crazed bonker.
I mean, she was weird and creepy, but she was trying to save you from the real crazed bonker.
Well, but that means - [evil chuckling.]
- [Eep screaming.]
They say he's still out there, looking for his next cave person to bonk on the head.
I'm a cave person, and my head is very bonkable.
[gasps and panting.]
- Aaah! Don't bonk me! - You okay, Eep? [sobs.]
Fine, I'm scared, okay? I hate all these scary stories, and I never should've accepted Bulk's dare.
[Bulk.]
Again, I didn't dare you.
I don't know what I was trying to prove by claiming I was brave enough to make it all the way to Huh.
The end.
[laughing.]
We made it to the end of the tunnel.
Take that, Bulk! [Bulk.]
Uh, whatever.
Ooh! Wait, look.
There's one more story here.
- [all screaming.]
- Those things will haunt me forever! Today, you laugh at me no more.
For today I will skip a stone across your face, water! I forgot to let go! Aaah! [groaning.]
Take that, water.
Help! Help! Help! Help! [gasps.]
Oh You You saved [coughing.]
[retching.]
You saved me! [guttural grunt.]
Wait.
Who are you, mysterious Thunk-saver? Oh, don't leave without a hug.
- [gasps.]
- [guttural growl.]
I've never seen anything like you.
You're a a a thing.
No, Thunk, be more descriptive.
You're a You're a, uh sea thing! And he saved my life.
It was unbelievable.
Oh, I believe you that it was completely unbelievable.
To be clear, I in no way believe you.
Gee, kid, you remind me of my half-lizard grandson.
He's bonkers, too.
Neat.
And I got asked to lunch by a purple-winged cheetah, as friends, not out of pity.
I love make-believe.
- No - don't - believe - you.
Why are you all talking like that? - We - don't - know.
- Help us.
We're stuck like this.
[groans.]
But when I told them about the sea thing, they all acted like I was crazy.
And not the usual "Oh, he's so creative" crazy, but, like, really crazy.
[munching.]
- There, there.
- Sure they meant nothing by it.
Comforting remark.
Uh, wait.
None of you actually disagreed just now.
Well comforting remark again? - Oh, I tried.
- [sighs.]
Thunk, you got to admit, you do dream up some crazy stuff.
Ha ha ha ha! Now this is babysitting! [laughing.]
Whoo! But the more I think about it, I do believe you about the sea thing.
Also, cheep-cheep-cheep [chirping and tweeting.]
Chirp uh, tweet tweet tweet.
- Uh, he's doing it again.
- Chirp chirp, tweet aah! No, this is different.
This sea thing is real.
Who do you think saved me? Me? Come on.
Please, you guys gotta believe me, right? [sighs and mutters.]
Well, I don't care what anybody else thinks, and I'm just gonna say it.
Dibs on the last chickuna leg! [munching.]
Fine, I'll prove the sea thing is real.
And then you'll have to believe me.
Thunk Crood will not be dismissed! May I be dismissed? - Mm-hmm.
- Hmm.
So I'm happy to help 'cause you're my friend and I have poor boundaries, but who cares if people believe you? You know what you saw.
Because I'm tired of people thinking I'm just some weirdo who lives in his own fantasy world.
That's the spirit, Thunk.
No.
No, no, no, I'm done with all that.
I wanna be believed.
Let's find that sea thing.
I'm gonna call him out by mimicking the noise he made.
Something like this.
[wild, off-key shouts and grunts.]
Huh.
I guess I'm a little off-key.
Maybe some food will lure him out.
[gasping.]
Hey, that's not for you.
- [munching.]
- It's not for you, either.
[smooching.]
Caveman's final frontier.
The bottom of the sea.
Oh, that frontier isn't as final as it looks.
Wait! Aah! I did it! I got proof! No, no, no, no, no.
Um, it's kinda blurry.
- [groaning.]
- Um, it's kinda broken.
[groans.]
Thunk, buddy, you've been out there all day! You're getting pretty wrinkled! No! I gotta find him.
And I won't be done until You're done, Thunk.
Let's go home.
Get lost, leader man.
We leave when we wanna leave.
- Womp, go home.
- Okay.
Bye, Thunk.
- But, Dad, the sea thing.
- [exhales.]
Look, son, it's okay that you made up this "sea thing" thing, but you're taking it too far, so, come on, before you hurt yourself.
Hurt myself.
Of course! What? No, that wasn't a suggestion.
Oh, ow! I have been hit in the head.
Oh, I might sink.
Somebody help me! Preferably the sea thing who saved me last time, though.
Uh, gurgle Uh, gurgle, drown.
Oh, I'm drowning.
[groans.]
[gasps.]
[gasps.]
It's a sea thing! - It worked.
It worked! - [guttural grunt.]
Victory hug, buddy? I've gotta get outta here.
- You can talk? You can talk.
- Yeah.
So, what are you? Where do you live? Do you have toes? How many toes? What's your favorite color? Is it dark under the water? - No more questions.
- So many more questions.
Oh, so many more questions! Oh, no.
Thunk, I'm coming, son! [panting.]
Oh, that's embarrassing.
Hold still.
It's for my own good.
- You saw him, right, Dad? - Oh, oh Oh, yeah.
I am never doubting you again.
It was just like you said, in our very own watering hole! - Yes.
- A mysterious sea thing! - Yes.
- Who's covered in seaweed! - Yes.
- And incredibly dangerous! Yeah! Wait, no.
I saw it with my own eyes and drew this super precise sketch from memory.
But that's all wrong.
You drew, like one, two 400 too many teeth.
And you didn't fight him.
[chuckles.]
Well, that is for scale.
Um [clears throat.]
Thunk, I'm on your side.
Let me handle it.
Valley, there's only one thing to do to this monster that attacked my son.
Catch the sea thing, tie him up, and relocate him to another water source far away.
- Yeah, okay.
- Or we could just kill sea thing.
Or Yeah, well, that is easier.
Let's do that! - Sounds like a job for an angry mob! - Yeah! - Whoo! Yeah.
- Uh-huh.
All right, mob, here's the plan.
Run! Push to the front! First one to get the head wins! - Head, head! - I like being part of a group! Wait, guys, let's think about this.
Hey, watch out! Okay, get him, yeah! [yelling.]
I wanted them to believe me that the sea thing was real, not kill the guy.
- Dad, you trust me, right? - As of today, yeah.
So then you'll agree with me that this is crazy.
[grunting.]
You're right, son.
What's the point of all this hullabaloo? [chuckling.]
Let's drain the water so the sea thing has nowhere to hide! - [cheering and roaring.]
- [whimpers.]
[groans.]
Almost there.
Pee breaks are for finishers.
[slurping.]
Hey, there he is! [gasps.]
No, wait, Dad.
He's not What the? It's a fake? Um, sorry, Dad.
I wanted everyone to believe my story, but the truth is, I made the sea thing up.
- But I saw it attack you.
- Nope, just Womp in a costume.
Huh.
I don't remember doing that, but it does sound like me.
[groaning.]
Uh Amber still get kill something, right? - Hmm - [yelling.]
You know, son, after today, it's gonna be a long time before people believe your crazy stories again.
I understand.
But if nobody ever believes me again, I guess that's okay.
- Who are you winking at? - Uh you.
Oh, thanks, son.
You're still in trouble.
- Thanks for saving me back there.
- Of course! And don't forget, it was me who nearly got you killed in the first place.
Eh? - I haven't.
- [nervous chuckle.]
Right.
Well, I figured all that matters is that I know you're real, right? And my friend.
Sure.
Us weirdos gotta stick together.
What? You're not weird at all.
- Whoops! Spoke too soon.
- I'm half boy, half lizard.
[laughing.]
That was fun, tricking my dad together.
Maybe we can trick your dad some time.
I live with my granddad.
Maybe you know him.
There you are! Been searching all day! Did you start an angry mob again? You crazy kids and your fun.
- [grunting.]
- [blows raspberries.]
[sighs.]
Gotta remember to let go!