Highlander (1992) s04e07 Episode Script
The Colonel
Amanda, for thousands of years, the Watchers have lived by one single set of rules.
We observe, we record, and we stay the hell out of it.
Would you give me a break? That is such a guy-thing.
You have your rules and MacLeod has his.
Mac and I had a good friend-- Charlie DeSalvo.
And he's dead because I broke those rules.
Ah, damn it! See, I bleed.
I can get an infection and die.
You'll want to run some cold water on that.
Well, on the surface, we may look alike, but underneath, we are two different species.
It's right that Mac backed off.
It's better this way.
Look, Joe, we're all different-- black, white, men, women-- we all live in our own only little worlds.
With me and Mac it's different universes.
- Then why are you both so hurt? - What do you mean by that? I mention your name, and he immediately changes the subject.
I bring him up and you've spent things you don't have in common.
Which is absolutely everything.
Hey, pal, you wouldn't have change for the meter, would you? Look, I took an oath.
I have to live by it.
Oh, yeah? Well, let's just picture two gravestones, okay? One says, "He lived by the rules.
" The other one says, "He was a good friend.
" Now which one do you want? You should try to get the Beatles back together too.
Come on, Joe, just-just talk to him, okay, for me, please? I'll think about it.
Good.
Because he's on his way over.
MacLeod is coming here? - Mm-hmm.
- To see me? Well, actually, I told him you had the night off.
You expect me to make the first move.
Would you, please, for me, Joe? - Please? Thought you were some big shot fighter? I was a contender.
I was 76-17 forty-seven knockouts.
If I hadn't zapped him, he would have kicked your ass.
See you later.
Okay, tough guy sleep tight.
He is Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander.
Born in 1592, in the Highlands of Scotland, and he is still alive.
He is immortal.
For 400 years, he's been a warrior, a lover, a wanderer, constantly facing other Immortals in combat to the death.
The winner takes his enemy's head and with it, his power.
I am a Watcher, part of a secret society of men and women who observe and record, but never interfere.
We know the truth about Immortals.
In the end, there can be only one.
May it be Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander.
Here we are Born to be kings We're the princes of the universe I am immortal I have inside me blood of kings I have no rival No man can be my equal Take me to the future of your world Let's get him inside.
You know, you didn't need to zap him.
I could have taken him.
Yeah, sure.
You could have taken him to a movie, maybe.
Hey, I took him on.
You were a big help.
And you're a pain in the ass.
Come on, sweet pea.
I'm getting tired of dragging this guy around.
Would you look at that? I didn't think he'd be your type.
- He's not.
You like me, don't you? Come here.
Ohh.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm such a klutz.
I'm just gonna go to the ladies room.
Don't go away.
I'm-I'm really sorry.
Not bad for an amateur.
What are you talking about? I think the glass in the lap was overkill.
Way, way over the top.
Are you a cop? Not in this life.
My name's Amanda.
Why don't you sit and have a drink with me? My date's late.
Movin' on.
Oh, yeah? Without these? I've had centuries of practice.
Now why didn't you take his wallet? It's not about cash.
Is that so? I'm not a thief.
Really? Why don't you sit and talk to me, tell me all about it? Lou, could we have, uh, two drinks? Something fruity? Who the hell is that guy? Geez.
Oh, man, he's late.
The Colonel's never late.
We're 13 minutes early.
What's the Colonel want him for anyhow? You're not being paid to ask questions.
You're a real friendly guy, you know that? Basically, I go to work, I do a perm, I go to a club, I go to sleep.
It's the same thing every day.
The only thing that changes are the blue-haired old ladies that sit in my chair.
So you steal because you're bored? Oh, no, I do it for the rush.
I mean, I just want to take the guy's Beemer for a little joyride, you know.
I'll give it back.
Do you want some company? You want to come with me? Bitchin'! But what about your date? Looks like you got stood up.
Well, you know, he's teaching at this university.
He's probably arguing with some coed about a grade.
Yeah.
Right.
I'm sorry, Joe.
Hey, not a problem.
You ready? Yeah.
We're out of here.
Okay, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
You follow the fights? Yeah.
What of it? Who do you like on Friday? I got Fenton in three.
Fenton's a bum.
Ah, he took you out.
He got lucky.
You got lucky he didn't kill you.
You shoulda seen me in my prime.
I did.
As I remember, the match took only 20 minutes.
If I'd have been five years younger, I'd have murdered Fenton.
Give it up, will you, peabrain? What a set of wheels.
Wow.
I can't believe it.
Whoa! This is it.
Oh, man.
You're mental, girl.
This is LaBelles.
Is your heart pounding? Are you kidding me? It's in my throat.
Why don't we break into Penney's or something? Because Penney's doesn't have lasers or shatterproof glass or computerized locks, and what's the fun in that? You've done this before.
Oh, a couple of times in my youth.
What is that thing? This is a digital analyzer.
You carry it in your purse? Doesn't everybody? Damn I'm good.
I think we just moved from bitchin' to, like, grand theft.
I can't believe I'm here.
What, you're gonna stop? No.
You ready? What did you make me do that for? We have about 45 seconds before the police get here.
Come on.
You are so weird.
Oh, honey, you don't even know.
Oh, did we actually do that? What do you mean by that? You got tickets? Almost ringside.
How about you guys? Yeah, right.
Ringside at Gleason's Bar.
You think this bum would have comped me a couple of tickets.
You ever do any boxing? Not in the ring.
Oh, did we actually do that? I think so.
This is unbelievable.
I mean, one minute I'm sitting in a bar and the next, I'm breaking into LaBelles.
This is outrageous.
I mean, I do some crazy things sometimes, but this is just-- Fun.
Yeah.
I bet you do this kind of stuff all the time.
Uh, I used to.
Not anymore? - I gave it up.
- Why? Oh.
No, wait.
Don't tell me.
It's for a guy, right? The one who stood you up tonight? The man's a fool if you ask me.
He had a good reason.
Says him.
- Let's go.
Hey, I think he's here, man.
Right on time.
Any problems? Nah.
I took him down in two.
Place him in the car.
You didn't take him in two.
Shut up.
You couldn't take my mother in two.
He's gone.
Come.
I was watching you when we were breaking into LaBelles.
Your hands didn't shake.
You didn't sweat.
You just had this look on your face that said no matter how hard they tried to keep you out, you knew they couldn't.
Am I right? Yes.
So what did you do before you were-- A thief? Yeah.
Mostly I was hungry.
- Duncan's here.
- How can you tell? The door.
- Oh.
Yeah.
- Hey.
I want you to meet my new friend Melissa.
Melissa, this is Duncan MacLeod.
His friends call him Mac.
- Hi, there.
- Hi, Mac.
He's awesome.
- You look terrible.
- She said I looked awesome.
She lied.
- Uh, I think I'd better go.
-Yeah, okay.
Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Okay.
Bye.
It was nice meeting you, Mac.
Yeah, and you, Melissa.
Bye.
Well, you can tell me all about it in a hot bath, okay? Maybe I'll even join you.
I'm sorry about Joe's.
I had a little business to take care of.
That's all right.
We'll do it another time.
So, what, did the other guy have a bigger sword or something? Don't worry about it.
It's just an old war wound acting up.
What's his name? - Killian.
- Will he keep coming? He'll keep coming.
He's got good reason.
Good afternoon.
Colonel Simon Killian, commanding.
Duncan MacLeod, transporting the wounded.
Ambulance driver? That's correct.
I would think that a man of your experience could do better.
I chose this duty.
Why? When you could lead men into battle instead.
Share their glory.
Hear their shouts of victory.
And the screams of the maimed and dying.
I fought here against Napoleon and Louis XIV.
I've seen men die for the same ground too many times to want to do it again.
The artillery's in place, Colonel.
Excellent, Sergeant.
Thank you.
The Hun think that they own this ground, but we own it.
We paid for it with the blood of a thousand men.
Excuse me, sir.
I'll borrow your canteen.
Thank you.
Urgent, sir.
Now that I have the reinforcements, I will drive them all the way back to Berlin.
- Urgent, sir.
From headquarters.
- Thank you.
That'll be all.
On your whistle, Sergeant.
Tell the men-- Yes, sir.
Today we take our revenge.
Sergeant, wait! - You can't do this.
- We have left too many dead here to leave with nothing.
But the war is over.
No one else has to die.
They die if I tell them to die.
Put him in irons.
It's true.
See for yourself.
My God, it is over.
We won.
You've never seen this, do you understand? This never arrived! You can't do this, Killian.
The war is over! The war is over when we take that ground.
Sound the attack, Sergeant.
That is an order.
I'm sorry, sir, but there won't be any attack.
I'll tell the men the news.
- Sergeant! - No! On your feet, men! Ready, men! Listen, listen! Listen to me! The war's over! "It's a Long Way to Tipperary" It's a long way to Tipperary It's a long way to go It's a long way to Tipperary To the sweetest girl I know Good-bye, Piccadilly Farewell, Leicester Square It's a long, long way to Tipperary But my heart's right there It's a long way to Tipperary Colonel Killian, after careful consideration of the evidence, this court finds you guilty on all charges.
Your heinous act resulted in the unnecessary deaths of 300 British and German soldiers.
You are hereby stripped of all rank and privileges and sentenced to death by firing squad.
And God only will have mercy on your soul.
You think you judge me.
You think you can dispose of me that easily? Men and their governments come and go, playing at peace while soldiers like me fight on.
Read your history books.
Peace is nothing but a pause between the wars.
Do you not think we will fight Germany again? - Guards, restrain him! - Shoot me, if you will.
I am Colonel Simon Killian! I was Colonel Simon Killian before you were born.
I will be Colonel Simon Killian long after you and yours are dead! I will dance on your graves! - Gentlemen, may I speak? -You insignificant bastards! Your testimony is on record.
What more can you add? I fear a grave injustice will be done if I do not speak.
Please.
I beg the court's indulgence.
I am a simple man.
But I was there when he ordered those men into battle.
And I can attest he was not in right mind.
He is as he was then-- a victim of his own delusions.
I beg you show mercy.
Spare his life.
You bastard.
I know what you're doing.
I demand to be shot! Do you hear me? It is my right! I demand it! Do you hear me? Come on.
Right.
This one.
Here's your new home.
Get in there.
Go on.
There you go.
He was sentenced to life in a prison for the criminally insane.
Why didn't you just let them shoot him? He had to pay the price for the men he killed.
Amanda, his crime was committed in the mortal world.
It was only right that he was sentenced by mortal justice.
Sometimes I worry about your overindulged sense of morality.
Do you now? Yeah.
But I wouldn't worry.
I'll protect you from it.
Ah, it's just lunch.
Besides, once you get to know her, I think you're really gonna like her.
Amanda, you only met her last night.
What can I say? There's something about a woman with her hand on a man's wallet that just turns me on.
Besides, what's the worst thing that can happen? She could get arrested.
She could go to prison.
No, no, no.
I'm a pro.
She's not.
Would you not worry? I promise we'll be good.
Yeah.
I'm sure you will be dressed like that.
What's wrong with the way I'm dressed? Oh, nothing.
You know, I think I'm taller than you are.
Yeah, very funny.
Oh, oh, oh, here's the place.
That's funny.
She said she'd be here.
Excuse me.
Is Melissa working today? Amanda, is this completely perfect or what? Melissa.
Well-- It-- It suits you.
You think? Yeah.
Maybe colored contacts.
No, you look just fine like that.
Oh, fine lines, girlfriend.
Oh, you like it? Well, here.
Yeah.
Oh, for me? Yeah, why not? Oh, I couldn't.
All right, I'll keep it.
Oh, on second thought.
It looks very nice.
Thank you.
You're the best.
Oh, that's sweet.
Oh, so sweet.
Just like sisters.
What do you think? I think one of you is enough.
Colonel? Consider the lone arachnid, Sergeant.
S-Sir? For years, they were my only companions.
Bees have a complex social structure.
Ants are arranged by class into an efficient army of workers.
But I prefer spiders.
Each so unique.
Solitary.
Spinning their fragile webs alone.
This one is a tarantula.
A harmless pet.
That one-- Loxosceles reclusa-- is as deadly as a bullet under the right circumstances.
Rather like people.
Some are poisonous, some are harmless.
What do you have for me? Oh, yeah.
The perfect bait.
Does he know it for a work of art, I wonder? Or does he know it only for the satisfaction of seeing his prey entangled in the merciless strands? -Let go of me.
-Here she comes.
Ah.
What did I do? Remove her blindfold.
Very pretty.
But not as pretty as this.
What do you want from me? I want nothing from you.
I want MacLeod.
He'll be coming to save you.
Why would he save me? - Because he loves you.
- Loves me? I just met him yesterday.
You lie rather well for someone so ordinary.
- I swear it's the truth.
- Tell me this isn't you.
-I-It's not.
That's Amanda, his girlfriend.
You're lying.
I swear I'm not.
Oh, God.
Get it off me.
Get it off me! Get it off! - The truth.
- I told you the truth! I'm a nobody.
You know I think you are.
Duncan? Mm? MacLeod? What? Melissa's gonna be here in a minute.
Would you entertain her while I get ready, please? What are you gonna teach your little protege tonight-- how to knock off an armored truck? I thought we'd go down to Kentucky and try Fort Knox.
Would you give me a break? We're just going to a club.
- She knows the band.
- I'm sure she does.
- Are you enjoying this? - What? A girl's got to have friends of her own.
Same hair, same clothes? Don't you find it a little odd being cloned? Well, I can't help it that the girl has excellent taste.
As long as she doesn't have my man.
One of you is all I could handle.
Mmm.
Well, I got to get ready.
So you have to handle me later.
I can't wait.
He's downstairs.
Stay here.
Right.
It's okay, Melissa.
It's all right.
Don't move.
Stay still.
It's okay.
It's all right, sweetheart.
Don't worry.
It's all right.
Easy.
It hurts.
Help me.
Please, don't leave me here.
God.
I won't leave you.
Take care of her.
Melissa.
Call an ambulance.
Oh, my God.
What did he do to her? Oh, honey, hold on.
It's gonna be okay.
It's gonna be okay.
I'm so cold, Amanda.
It's okay.
Hold me.
It's gonna be okay.
He thought I was you.
I messed up pretty good, huh? I just wanted to have some fun.
Welcome to my parlor.
Very homey.
If you wanted me here, you should have just told me, instead of using the girl.
Think of her as an invitation.
This is between you and me, Killian.
Isn't that what you dreamed of all these years? My dreams would terrify you.
Kill him! - Jesus! - Kill him! Liver? Lovely piece of work.
How do you feel, MacLeod? Naked? Helpless? Just as I felt when they took my rank and my sword? - You deserved it.
- Did I? You know, you were right.
I have dreamed of this day.
Seventy years.
Seventy years they locked me away.
So long that no one remembered where I came from or who I was.
And all I thought about was you.
Really? And how to return the favor.
Oh, I'm flattered.
Get used to your new home, MacLeod.
No one's used this brig in 40 years.
And the only one who knows you're down here thinks you're dead.
So what's my sentence, Colonel, sir? Fair is fair.
I did 70 years.
You'll do 70 years.
Unless, of course, someone takes my head.
- Then you'll be here forever.
- Maybe I should take up a hobby.
There's enough food and water here for the first 50 years.
Long enough for everything you love to die.
And so you don't think too badly of me, the lightbulb is an extended life.
It should burn for at least two years.
I've heard that the madness comes more slowly in the light.
And I want you to experience every precious moment as you wait for the darkness to come.
I guess you didn't leave me anything to read? Just the walls and the ceiling, MacLeod.
Amanda, two Immortals go off together, one doesn't come back.
We both know what happened.
I'm sorry.
Look, Joe, I would know if he was dead.
I would-- I would feel it.
Amanda, he's gone.
No, he's alive.
And if he's not alive, then I want to know where to find Killian.
All right.
I'll see what I can find out.
If I came down this street Even when I want to-- Great.
Oh, I hate that sound.
hanging on the wall Joe Dawson? Andrea Henson.
I watch Simon Killian.
Thanks for coming down.
Can I get you a coffee? Sure.
Is there a problem? No.
No problem.
I'm sure you're doing just fine.
I'm still filing with London.
We figure Killian will go back there.
Yeah.
You're probably right.
Do you think, uh, Killian came to town just for MacLeod? It stands to reason.
They got a history.
You know they met last night.
I'm, uh, writing my close-up on MacLeod.
He's not dead.
They shot him, but Killian didn't take his head.
He's locked him in one of those old cells at the abandoned air force base.
- You didn't know? - No.
I-- I didn't know.
Listen, this is your territory, and I'm the new kid on the block.
But I know people in the Paris office, and a gal hears stuff.
Rumors.
What, uh, what kind of rumors? You and MacLeod.
That you're more than just his Watcher.
You're not going to get involved, are you, Joe? My first safe in years.
- Amanda? - Duncan.
What are you doing here? Did you miss me? More than you'll ever know.
How's Melissa? She's in the hospital.
I don't know if she's gonna make it.
I'm sorry.
How did you find me? I had a little help from a friend.
Hello, Mac.
I thought we agreed to stay out of each other's way? We can always throw you back if you want.
I've got to take a trip to Gleason's Bar.
-You're drunk.
- It was him, I tell you, at Gleason's Bar.
He was no more than That's impossible.
No, what's impossible is he's alive.
I put seven slugs in that guy.
Did you check the cell? No.
How did you-- I used to be in the Boy Scouts.
I got a merit badge just for this.
Ah, this damn stuff used to fit before.
Amanda, it wasn't your fault.
Oh, yeah? Well, then, whose fault was it, huh? She was trying to be like me, she almost died, and I just let her do this.
It was Killian's fault, not yours.
I know, but I-- It doesn't feel that way.
I don't know what to tell you.
Look I love you and you're my best friend.
But I just have to go away.
Um, I've got to get it together.
Door's always open.
I know.
God, I just-- I forgot how fragile they are.
Yeah.
Okay, so I'm going to, um, call you when I get there and you can send my stuff to me.
Or anything you need.
Anything I can do.
I'll always be there for you, right? You want to do something for me? Go and see Joe.
Duncan, life is too short for him.
Hmm? Think about it.
Maybe.
All right.
I'm gonna miss you.
You wanna, uh, take five, Lou? You broke the rules.
Yeah, well it's not the first time.
I figured it was a good cause.
It's hard to say no to Amanda.
Yeah, I know.
She left this morning.
Well, you'll see her again.
Always do.
You wanna talk about it? Nah.
And here we are We're the princes of the universe Here we belong fighting for survival We've come to be the rulers of your world I am immortal I have inside me blood of kings I have no rival No man can be my equal Take me to the future of your world
We observe, we record, and we stay the hell out of it.
Would you give me a break? That is such a guy-thing.
You have your rules and MacLeod has his.
Mac and I had a good friend-- Charlie DeSalvo.
And he's dead because I broke those rules.
Ah, damn it! See, I bleed.
I can get an infection and die.
You'll want to run some cold water on that.
Well, on the surface, we may look alike, but underneath, we are two different species.
It's right that Mac backed off.
It's better this way.
Look, Joe, we're all different-- black, white, men, women-- we all live in our own only little worlds.
With me and Mac it's different universes.
- Then why are you both so hurt? - What do you mean by that? I mention your name, and he immediately changes the subject.
I bring him up and you've spent things you don't have in common.
Which is absolutely everything.
Hey, pal, you wouldn't have change for the meter, would you? Look, I took an oath.
I have to live by it.
Oh, yeah? Well, let's just picture two gravestones, okay? One says, "He lived by the rules.
" The other one says, "He was a good friend.
" Now which one do you want? You should try to get the Beatles back together too.
Come on, Joe, just-just talk to him, okay, for me, please? I'll think about it.
Good.
Because he's on his way over.
MacLeod is coming here? - Mm-hmm.
- To see me? Well, actually, I told him you had the night off.
You expect me to make the first move.
Would you, please, for me, Joe? - Please? Thought you were some big shot fighter? I was a contender.
I was 76-17 forty-seven knockouts.
If I hadn't zapped him, he would have kicked your ass.
See you later.
Okay, tough guy sleep tight.
He is Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander.
Born in 1592, in the Highlands of Scotland, and he is still alive.
He is immortal.
For 400 years, he's been a warrior, a lover, a wanderer, constantly facing other Immortals in combat to the death.
The winner takes his enemy's head and with it, his power.
I am a Watcher, part of a secret society of men and women who observe and record, but never interfere.
We know the truth about Immortals.
In the end, there can be only one.
May it be Duncan MacLeod, the Highlander.
Here we are Born to be kings We're the princes of the universe I am immortal I have inside me blood of kings I have no rival No man can be my equal Take me to the future of your world Let's get him inside.
You know, you didn't need to zap him.
I could have taken him.
Yeah, sure.
You could have taken him to a movie, maybe.
Hey, I took him on.
You were a big help.
And you're a pain in the ass.
Come on, sweet pea.
I'm getting tired of dragging this guy around.
Would you look at that? I didn't think he'd be your type.
- He's not.
You like me, don't you? Come here.
Ohh.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm such a klutz.
I'm just gonna go to the ladies room.
Don't go away.
I'm-I'm really sorry.
Not bad for an amateur.
What are you talking about? I think the glass in the lap was overkill.
Way, way over the top.
Are you a cop? Not in this life.
My name's Amanda.
Why don't you sit and have a drink with me? My date's late.
Movin' on.
Oh, yeah? Without these? I've had centuries of practice.
Now why didn't you take his wallet? It's not about cash.
Is that so? I'm not a thief.
Really? Why don't you sit and talk to me, tell me all about it? Lou, could we have, uh, two drinks? Something fruity? Who the hell is that guy? Geez.
Oh, man, he's late.
The Colonel's never late.
We're 13 minutes early.
What's the Colonel want him for anyhow? You're not being paid to ask questions.
You're a real friendly guy, you know that? Basically, I go to work, I do a perm, I go to a club, I go to sleep.
It's the same thing every day.
The only thing that changes are the blue-haired old ladies that sit in my chair.
So you steal because you're bored? Oh, no, I do it for the rush.
I mean, I just want to take the guy's Beemer for a little joyride, you know.
I'll give it back.
Do you want some company? You want to come with me? Bitchin'! But what about your date? Looks like you got stood up.
Well, you know, he's teaching at this university.
He's probably arguing with some coed about a grade.
Yeah.
Right.
I'm sorry, Joe.
Hey, not a problem.
You ready? Yeah.
We're out of here.
Okay, I'll see you later.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
You follow the fights? Yeah.
What of it? Who do you like on Friday? I got Fenton in three.
Fenton's a bum.
Ah, he took you out.
He got lucky.
You got lucky he didn't kill you.
You shoulda seen me in my prime.
I did.
As I remember, the match took only 20 minutes.
If I'd have been five years younger, I'd have murdered Fenton.
Give it up, will you, peabrain? What a set of wheels.
Wow.
I can't believe it.
Whoa! This is it.
Oh, man.
You're mental, girl.
This is LaBelles.
Is your heart pounding? Are you kidding me? It's in my throat.
Why don't we break into Penney's or something? Because Penney's doesn't have lasers or shatterproof glass or computerized locks, and what's the fun in that? You've done this before.
Oh, a couple of times in my youth.
What is that thing? This is a digital analyzer.
You carry it in your purse? Doesn't everybody? Damn I'm good.
I think we just moved from bitchin' to, like, grand theft.
I can't believe I'm here.
What, you're gonna stop? No.
You ready? What did you make me do that for? We have about 45 seconds before the police get here.
Come on.
You are so weird.
Oh, honey, you don't even know.
Oh, did we actually do that? What do you mean by that? You got tickets? Almost ringside.
How about you guys? Yeah, right.
Ringside at Gleason's Bar.
You think this bum would have comped me a couple of tickets.
You ever do any boxing? Not in the ring.
Oh, did we actually do that? I think so.
This is unbelievable.
I mean, one minute I'm sitting in a bar and the next, I'm breaking into LaBelles.
This is outrageous.
I mean, I do some crazy things sometimes, but this is just-- Fun.
Yeah.
I bet you do this kind of stuff all the time.
Uh, I used to.
Not anymore? - I gave it up.
- Why? Oh.
No, wait.
Don't tell me.
It's for a guy, right? The one who stood you up tonight? The man's a fool if you ask me.
He had a good reason.
Says him.
- Let's go.
Hey, I think he's here, man.
Right on time.
Any problems? Nah.
I took him down in two.
Place him in the car.
You didn't take him in two.
Shut up.
You couldn't take my mother in two.
He's gone.
Come.
I was watching you when we were breaking into LaBelles.
Your hands didn't shake.
You didn't sweat.
You just had this look on your face that said no matter how hard they tried to keep you out, you knew they couldn't.
Am I right? Yes.
So what did you do before you were-- A thief? Yeah.
Mostly I was hungry.
- Duncan's here.
- How can you tell? The door.
- Oh.
Yeah.
- Hey.
I want you to meet my new friend Melissa.
Melissa, this is Duncan MacLeod.
His friends call him Mac.
- Hi, there.
- Hi, Mac.
He's awesome.
- You look terrible.
- She said I looked awesome.
She lied.
- Uh, I think I'd better go.
-Yeah, okay.
Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow.
Okay.
Bye.
It was nice meeting you, Mac.
Yeah, and you, Melissa.
Bye.
Well, you can tell me all about it in a hot bath, okay? Maybe I'll even join you.
I'm sorry about Joe's.
I had a little business to take care of.
That's all right.
We'll do it another time.
So, what, did the other guy have a bigger sword or something? Don't worry about it.
It's just an old war wound acting up.
What's his name? - Killian.
- Will he keep coming? He'll keep coming.
He's got good reason.
Good afternoon.
Colonel Simon Killian, commanding.
Duncan MacLeod, transporting the wounded.
Ambulance driver? That's correct.
I would think that a man of your experience could do better.
I chose this duty.
Why? When you could lead men into battle instead.
Share their glory.
Hear their shouts of victory.
And the screams of the maimed and dying.
I fought here against Napoleon and Louis XIV.
I've seen men die for the same ground too many times to want to do it again.
The artillery's in place, Colonel.
Excellent, Sergeant.
Thank you.
The Hun think that they own this ground, but we own it.
We paid for it with the blood of a thousand men.
Excuse me, sir.
I'll borrow your canteen.
Thank you.
Urgent, sir.
Now that I have the reinforcements, I will drive them all the way back to Berlin.
- Urgent, sir.
From headquarters.
- Thank you.
That'll be all.
On your whistle, Sergeant.
Tell the men-- Yes, sir.
Today we take our revenge.
Sergeant, wait! - You can't do this.
- We have left too many dead here to leave with nothing.
But the war is over.
No one else has to die.
They die if I tell them to die.
Put him in irons.
It's true.
See for yourself.
My God, it is over.
We won.
You've never seen this, do you understand? This never arrived! You can't do this, Killian.
The war is over! The war is over when we take that ground.
Sound the attack, Sergeant.
That is an order.
I'm sorry, sir, but there won't be any attack.
I'll tell the men the news.
- Sergeant! - No! On your feet, men! Ready, men! Listen, listen! Listen to me! The war's over! "It's a Long Way to Tipperary" It's a long way to Tipperary It's a long way to go It's a long way to Tipperary To the sweetest girl I know Good-bye, Piccadilly Farewell, Leicester Square It's a long, long way to Tipperary But my heart's right there It's a long way to Tipperary Colonel Killian, after careful consideration of the evidence, this court finds you guilty on all charges.
Your heinous act resulted in the unnecessary deaths of 300 British and German soldiers.
You are hereby stripped of all rank and privileges and sentenced to death by firing squad.
And God only will have mercy on your soul.
You think you judge me.
You think you can dispose of me that easily? Men and their governments come and go, playing at peace while soldiers like me fight on.
Read your history books.
Peace is nothing but a pause between the wars.
Do you not think we will fight Germany again? - Guards, restrain him! - Shoot me, if you will.
I am Colonel Simon Killian! I was Colonel Simon Killian before you were born.
I will be Colonel Simon Killian long after you and yours are dead! I will dance on your graves! - Gentlemen, may I speak? -You insignificant bastards! Your testimony is on record.
What more can you add? I fear a grave injustice will be done if I do not speak.
Please.
I beg the court's indulgence.
I am a simple man.
But I was there when he ordered those men into battle.
And I can attest he was not in right mind.
He is as he was then-- a victim of his own delusions.
I beg you show mercy.
Spare his life.
You bastard.
I know what you're doing.
I demand to be shot! Do you hear me? It is my right! I demand it! Do you hear me? Come on.
Right.
This one.
Here's your new home.
Get in there.
Go on.
There you go.
He was sentenced to life in a prison for the criminally insane.
Why didn't you just let them shoot him? He had to pay the price for the men he killed.
Amanda, his crime was committed in the mortal world.
It was only right that he was sentenced by mortal justice.
Sometimes I worry about your overindulged sense of morality.
Do you now? Yeah.
But I wouldn't worry.
I'll protect you from it.
Ah, it's just lunch.
Besides, once you get to know her, I think you're really gonna like her.
Amanda, you only met her last night.
What can I say? There's something about a woman with her hand on a man's wallet that just turns me on.
Besides, what's the worst thing that can happen? She could get arrested.
She could go to prison.
No, no, no.
I'm a pro.
She's not.
Would you not worry? I promise we'll be good.
Yeah.
I'm sure you will be dressed like that.
What's wrong with the way I'm dressed? Oh, nothing.
You know, I think I'm taller than you are.
Yeah, very funny.
Oh, oh, oh, here's the place.
That's funny.
She said she'd be here.
Excuse me.
Is Melissa working today? Amanda, is this completely perfect or what? Melissa.
Well-- It-- It suits you.
You think? Yeah.
Maybe colored contacts.
No, you look just fine like that.
Oh, fine lines, girlfriend.
Oh, you like it? Well, here.
Yeah.
Oh, for me? Yeah, why not? Oh, I couldn't.
All right, I'll keep it.
Oh, on second thought.
It looks very nice.
Thank you.
You're the best.
Oh, that's sweet.
Oh, so sweet.
Just like sisters.
What do you think? I think one of you is enough.
Colonel? Consider the lone arachnid, Sergeant.
S-Sir? For years, they were my only companions.
Bees have a complex social structure.
Ants are arranged by class into an efficient army of workers.
But I prefer spiders.
Each so unique.
Solitary.
Spinning their fragile webs alone.
This one is a tarantula.
A harmless pet.
That one-- Loxosceles reclusa-- is as deadly as a bullet under the right circumstances.
Rather like people.
Some are poisonous, some are harmless.
What do you have for me? Oh, yeah.
The perfect bait.
Does he know it for a work of art, I wonder? Or does he know it only for the satisfaction of seeing his prey entangled in the merciless strands? -Let go of me.
-Here she comes.
Ah.
What did I do? Remove her blindfold.
Very pretty.
But not as pretty as this.
What do you want from me? I want nothing from you.
I want MacLeod.
He'll be coming to save you.
Why would he save me? - Because he loves you.
- Loves me? I just met him yesterday.
You lie rather well for someone so ordinary.
- I swear it's the truth.
- Tell me this isn't you.
-I-It's not.
That's Amanda, his girlfriend.
You're lying.
I swear I'm not.
Oh, God.
Get it off me.
Get it off me! Get it off! - The truth.
- I told you the truth! I'm a nobody.
You know I think you are.
Duncan? Mm? MacLeod? What? Melissa's gonna be here in a minute.
Would you entertain her while I get ready, please? What are you gonna teach your little protege tonight-- how to knock off an armored truck? I thought we'd go down to Kentucky and try Fort Knox.
Would you give me a break? We're just going to a club.
- She knows the band.
- I'm sure she does.
- Are you enjoying this? - What? A girl's got to have friends of her own.
Same hair, same clothes? Don't you find it a little odd being cloned? Well, I can't help it that the girl has excellent taste.
As long as she doesn't have my man.
One of you is all I could handle.
Mmm.
Well, I got to get ready.
So you have to handle me later.
I can't wait.
He's downstairs.
Stay here.
Right.
It's okay, Melissa.
It's all right.
Don't move.
Stay still.
It's okay.
It's all right, sweetheart.
Don't worry.
It's all right.
Easy.
It hurts.
Help me.
Please, don't leave me here.
God.
I won't leave you.
Take care of her.
Melissa.
Call an ambulance.
Oh, my God.
What did he do to her? Oh, honey, hold on.
It's gonna be okay.
It's gonna be okay.
I'm so cold, Amanda.
It's okay.
Hold me.
It's gonna be okay.
He thought I was you.
I messed up pretty good, huh? I just wanted to have some fun.
Welcome to my parlor.
Very homey.
If you wanted me here, you should have just told me, instead of using the girl.
Think of her as an invitation.
This is between you and me, Killian.
Isn't that what you dreamed of all these years? My dreams would terrify you.
Kill him! - Jesus! - Kill him! Liver? Lovely piece of work.
How do you feel, MacLeod? Naked? Helpless? Just as I felt when they took my rank and my sword? - You deserved it.
- Did I? You know, you were right.
I have dreamed of this day.
Seventy years.
Seventy years they locked me away.
So long that no one remembered where I came from or who I was.
And all I thought about was you.
Really? And how to return the favor.
Oh, I'm flattered.
Get used to your new home, MacLeod.
No one's used this brig in 40 years.
And the only one who knows you're down here thinks you're dead.
So what's my sentence, Colonel, sir? Fair is fair.
I did 70 years.
You'll do 70 years.
Unless, of course, someone takes my head.
- Then you'll be here forever.
- Maybe I should take up a hobby.
There's enough food and water here for the first 50 years.
Long enough for everything you love to die.
And so you don't think too badly of me, the lightbulb is an extended life.
It should burn for at least two years.
I've heard that the madness comes more slowly in the light.
And I want you to experience every precious moment as you wait for the darkness to come.
I guess you didn't leave me anything to read? Just the walls and the ceiling, MacLeod.
Amanda, two Immortals go off together, one doesn't come back.
We both know what happened.
I'm sorry.
Look, Joe, I would know if he was dead.
I would-- I would feel it.
Amanda, he's gone.
No, he's alive.
And if he's not alive, then I want to know where to find Killian.
All right.
I'll see what I can find out.
If I came down this street Even when I want to-- Great.
Oh, I hate that sound.
hanging on the wall Joe Dawson? Andrea Henson.
I watch Simon Killian.
Thanks for coming down.
Can I get you a coffee? Sure.
Is there a problem? No.
No problem.
I'm sure you're doing just fine.
I'm still filing with London.
We figure Killian will go back there.
Yeah.
You're probably right.
Do you think, uh, Killian came to town just for MacLeod? It stands to reason.
They got a history.
You know they met last night.
I'm, uh, writing my close-up on MacLeod.
He's not dead.
They shot him, but Killian didn't take his head.
He's locked him in one of those old cells at the abandoned air force base.
- You didn't know? - No.
I-- I didn't know.
Listen, this is your territory, and I'm the new kid on the block.
But I know people in the Paris office, and a gal hears stuff.
Rumors.
What, uh, what kind of rumors? You and MacLeod.
That you're more than just his Watcher.
You're not going to get involved, are you, Joe? My first safe in years.
- Amanda? - Duncan.
What are you doing here? Did you miss me? More than you'll ever know.
How's Melissa? She's in the hospital.
I don't know if she's gonna make it.
I'm sorry.
How did you find me? I had a little help from a friend.
Hello, Mac.
I thought we agreed to stay out of each other's way? We can always throw you back if you want.
I've got to take a trip to Gleason's Bar.
-You're drunk.
- It was him, I tell you, at Gleason's Bar.
He was no more than That's impossible.
No, what's impossible is he's alive.
I put seven slugs in that guy.
Did you check the cell? No.
How did you-- I used to be in the Boy Scouts.
I got a merit badge just for this.
Ah, this damn stuff used to fit before.
Amanda, it wasn't your fault.
Oh, yeah? Well, then, whose fault was it, huh? She was trying to be like me, she almost died, and I just let her do this.
It was Killian's fault, not yours.
I know, but I-- It doesn't feel that way.
I don't know what to tell you.
Look I love you and you're my best friend.
But I just have to go away.
Um, I've got to get it together.
Door's always open.
I know.
God, I just-- I forgot how fragile they are.
Yeah.
Okay, so I'm going to, um, call you when I get there and you can send my stuff to me.
Or anything you need.
Anything I can do.
I'll always be there for you, right? You want to do something for me? Go and see Joe.
Duncan, life is too short for him.
Hmm? Think about it.
Maybe.
All right.
I'm gonna miss you.
You wanna, uh, take five, Lou? You broke the rules.
Yeah, well it's not the first time.
I figured it was a good cause.
It's hard to say no to Amanda.
Yeah, I know.
She left this morning.
Well, you'll see her again.
Always do.
You wanna talk about it? Nah.
And here we are We're the princes of the universe Here we belong fighting for survival We've come to be the rulers of your world I am immortal I have inside me blood of kings I have no rival No man can be my equal Take me to the future of your world