Mad Men s04e07 Episode Script
The Suitcase
five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10, 11.
-Two for the Campbells, -Where are these exactly? It's a movie theater, no bad seats.
The Cosgroves, and Joey, Stan, Danny, $10 each.
How come we have to pay when everyone knows damn well they were free? You're such a Jew.
Your friends in Hollywood know you talk that way? And let me tell you, you're the Jew, trying to make 30 bucks on something you got for free.
Twenty-five on Clay by a knockout.
Liston is favored for a reason.
Cassius Clay is scared.
Of what, pray tell? He had an elevated heart rate before the last fight.
Who says that means you're scared? It happens to me all the time, it runs in my family.
Liston has the weight and he's never been knocked out.
Sonny's old.
He's experienced.
Don, I've got your ticket.
You want to put something down? Stan's got a barber who makes book.
Yeah, who do you like? I was just saying I think Clay'd make one hell of an adman.
You're right.
Give me 100 on Liston.
Joining us for a little pre-fight steak and cocktails at The Palm? Absolutely.
Samsonite team, in my office.
Listen, if it comes up with Jennifer, I did pay for the seats.
Can you make a dinner reservation before the bout for Mr.
Sterling and me anywhere but The Palm? I don't know why everyone cares so much about it.
If I wanted to see two Negroes fight, I'd throw a dollar bill out my window.
I thought we were doing this at 9:00.
it's 11:15.
I'm late, but you're not.
Good work so far.
Where do you want me? Behind the desk is fine.
You're in a white studio, like in some limbo.
There's two no-name football players holding an American Tourister and a Skyway going against Mr.
Joe Namath and his defender, a sexy girl holding a Samsonite, and maybe a referee.
So, we hear, "Hut, hut, hike!" Namath fades back.
"Oh, no, it's a blitz!" Punch in on Namath, he says something like "The secret to victory on the road is Samsonite.
"I carry it because it's tough, "and no matter what comes at me, I know I'm protected.
" As they fall, the competitors will bust open, clothing flying out.
Touchdown, Samsonite! -I got it, honey.
-You sure do, Joe.
âSamsonite It's tough Endorsements are lazy, and I don't like Joe Namath.
He hasn't even played in a professional game yet.
He's very handsome.
And women don't buy suitcases.
Dr.
Faye says they do.
Could you leave us, please? Peggy, I'm glad that this is an environment where you feel free to fail.
You wanted to go with Danny's idea.
Because it works.
"Only Samsonite is tough.
" It's the execution that's the problem.
Okay, should it be funny? Actually funny? Maybe.
Funny like what I just saw? No.
Hello.
You remembered my birthday.
Did you open my present? I am.
Hold on.
My goodness.
I'm finally doing what I should've done years ago.
Phillips-Olson something probably, but I'll need you.
I want to form an agency that specializes in women's products with you as my creative director.
I don't know what to say.
But you're smiling, right? I have some very It's sort of a little under the table, but very high-level talks with the people at Tampax.
Peggy, it's Tampax, 50% market share.
I mean they're really up there.
Plus that queer at Belle Jolie has been barking up my tree.
Plus I have my European connections.
It sounds exciting.
The train's leaving the station, honey.
Get on board.
Where am I calling you? I'm in my office at home.
So, you already told Grey? I'm not wasting my talents over there anymore.
Believe me, it was mutual.
Duck, did you lose your job? Peggy, this is good.
I'm not gonna lie.
I was a little inspired by what Draper did.
Now I just need some accounts.
It's tough because, well It's tough to get a credit line.
So, what do you have so far? I know it's not a diamond necklace, but I did spend some money on those cards.
And I appreciate the gesture.
It's just I don't know whether to take this seriously because I suspect you've been drinking.
Well, you're wrong.
I heard about the CLIOs.
I have to see you tonight.
I have plans.
What, with that Mark? He's another one.
Duck, you are a valuable account man.
You have a bright future.
You just need to go to one of those headhunters and I need to see you, babe.
Don't do that.
Peg, I'm falling apart.
Don't you know you're the last thing that made me feel good about myself? Pull your hands out of your panties.
I can't talk right now.
I want to see you tonight.
You been farting in here? I have to go.
We're going to lunch.
I don't know if you could tell, but he hated it.
I was hating it too while we were doing it, but not before.
I'm not gonna lie.
So, we're back to the drawing board.
Still gotta eat.
Come on, it's your birthday.
We'll let you talk through lunch.
You got a call while you were in the toilet to the direct line.
Stephanie from California, no last name.
She says it's urgent.
Would you like me to place the call? No, I've got it.
Bad news.
Our night is ruined.
I took care of that.
The kids are going to The Palm.
We are going anywhere else.
Well, the brotherhood of Alcoholics Anonymous, Freddy and Cal Rutledge from Pond's will be joining us for dinner and the fight, which means we'll have to drink before dinner, if we want to drink at all.
And then there's all the talk about drinking, where they start with the funny stories and they end up crying.
Again.
Fifteen months I've been waiting for this fight.
$300.
Liston has to lose by unconsciousness.
-Get rid of 'em.
-I can't.
I should work on Samsonite.
That's in two weeks.
I'm gonna be in Florida.
Now, this is your job too.
Let's go.
I'm sorry.
You can do that without me.
Samsonite you can't.
Are you serious? We can solve this problem with a flask.
No, I wouldn't be good company anyway.
That's never bothered me before.
I don't know what it is, but I look at the side of your neck and I wish I had one of those James Bond pens so I could jam a dart in it.
James Bond likes to travel.
He goes all over the world.
He goes underwater.
He met a girl underwater.
I think this is a good place to stop.
See you tomorrow.
Great.
I don't like sitting at my desk and looking into a garbage dump.
Although I am paid less, I am still not a janitor.
Thank you, gentlemen.
-Doing something special for your birthday? -Mark is taking me to dinner.
The Forum of the Twelve Caesars.
Yes.
How old are you? Twenty-six, today.
You're doing all right, aren't you? Well, hello.
Did I hear it's your birthday? It is.
How are you feeling? Well, of course my days are spent sleeping and visiting the ladies' room, although it's an incredible feeling having this baby kick me.
Is it any different than living with Pete? You're witty.
I always assumed that, but it turns out it's true.
Are you going to watch the tight? Yes.
I've been watching boxing since I was a little girl.
My father loves blood sport.
Mr.
Draper's looking for you.
I'm sorry.
I have to go.
Happy birthday.
You know, 26 is still very young.
Have fun.
I want a rare steak, and I want to see those two men pound each other.
Cynthia's at the restaurant.
We should go.
What about Jennifer? Don't go in there.
Don't do it.
-She's dead.
-Let's beat it before it's us.
-I was just on my way out.
-Did you get California? Do you want me to try before I depart? There's a time difference, you know.
I do, but it goes the other way.
Good night, Mr.
Draper.
Get in here.
Why don't you talk to Joan and get rid of her? No, Joan knew exactly what I needed and made sure that I got it.
So, where are we on Samsonite? We'll have something to show you in the morning.
But the suspense is killing me.
Well, I kind of was on my way out.
Let me just see where we are.
I guess I've got a minute.
Okay.
We thought that Samsonite is this very rare element, this mythical substance, the hardest on earth, and we see an adventurer leaping through a cave.
Is this a substance much like bullshit? I thought we could drop one off the Eiffel Tower, with a countdown, like the moon shot and show how it doesn't break.
-But it would, wouldn't it? -Probably.
The government has prohibited us from doing things like that, Peggy.
They feel that it is not in the public interest.
We have a thing with Samson, because he's strong and his hair.
I gave you more responsibility and you didn't do anything? That you like.
We did work.
A lot.
I don't care if you work 10 seconds if you bring me something I like.
We're going to do this right now.
I Know you have plans.
You were going to call me from a bar with an idea? You think elves do this? You're just gonna change it anyway.
Excuse me? This is Mark Kerney.
I am so sorry.
I got drawn into his web.
It's gonna be a while.
A while like soon, or a while like I should cancel? Fifteen minutes? It shouldn't take too long.
He's going to the boxing match.
He's going to Maine? You can watch it on closed-circuit TV in the movie theaters.
We got tickets.
How come we didn't go? Because we're having a romantic dinner for my birthday.
Well, did you tell him that? Look, I'm the only one who can help him with this, and the sooner I get off the phone, the sooner I can come.
Just hurry, will you? She's gonna be a few minutes late.
A surprise on top of a surprise.
She works too hard- "The Oysters of Hercules, which you with sword shall carve.
" I saw a tray pass by.
They look like hockey pucks.
$1.
65.
You should let Gerry get this.
Mom, don't cut the kid off at the knees.
Now, what if an elephant either sits on or steps on a suitcase? How about a slow-moving airplane runs it over? Do you like Cassius Clay? He's very handsome.
I don't think so.
You're not supposed to.
I remember my mother talking about Nat King Cole in a way that made my father throw out all his records.
He's got a big mouth.
"I'm the greatest.
" Not if you have to say it.
Muhammad Ali.
Do you like the airplane? Liston just goes about his business, works methodically.
Clay will dance and talk, throw a few until he's wiped out.
A bag under an airplane looks like there's been an accident.
Three classes of suitcase.
Featherweight, middleweight, heavyweight.
For whatever class you're in.
But how do you do that on TV? What's the story? You don't like it? No, I love it.
That's great.
That's what we should do.
Let it ring.
I'll say you're not here.
Hello? Hello, Roger.
No, he's not here.
I answer other people's phones all the time.
I'm going to count to three, then I'm gonna start saying a lot of words you don't like, sweetheart.
This should be good.
I'm begging you, get down here right away.
You think I'd rather be working? Yeah, I do.
Did you know Freddy Rumsen collects Indian arrowheads? Where are you? There's a bar next to Keenes.
I've been sneaking off to fortify myself.
Tell 'em you're sick.
Go home.
I am sick.
I think I overdid it.
And they're self so righteous.
I never pissed my pants.
This guy Rutledge killed a man with a motorboat.
You know what gets you over something like that? Drinking.
Still got your ticket.
It's an attractive offer.
Look out your window.
Can you see me? Good night, sweetheart.
Go ahead.
I'll wait.
Hello.
Fifteen minutes? It's almost an hour.
I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna leave any minute.
Did you at least have something? You have to get down here.
You have to get down here right away.
I can't just leave, okay? But you have to, okay? You know what? Just go to my apartment and wait for me.
We can eat there another time.
No, I don't want to do that.
I'll make it worth your while.
Damn it, Peggy.
I've got your whole family here for a surprise dinner, okay? And the only way you can make it worse is by not coming at all.
Mark.
I'm so sorry.
I'm coming right now.
Thank you.
Well, so much for the surprise.
Okay, I'm going to leave if that's all right with you.
I'm not so sure about it.
I mean every time we get into this, we abandon the toughness idea.
Maybe there's something to the elephant.
Do you want one? I'm sorry.
Do you have someplace to be? Maybe tap your foot so I get the message.
I was supposed to be at dinner an hour ago.
it's my birthday.
And I'm pretty sure I ruined everything.
Why the hell didn't you tell me? I don't know.
Because I thought this would take a second.
So, now I'm supposed to feel like crap? "I'm so sick that I ruined her birthday.
" Do you know when my birthday is? I was your secretary.
Well, enjoy your evening! By the way, you are 20-something years old.
it's time to get over birthdays.
Go ahead.
I'll do it myself.
Yes, I'm that important.
So, the fact that you're calling means you haven't left yet.
I'm not gonna be able to make it at all.
Are you kidding me? I'm sorry, but no one asked you to do this.
You said you never had a surprise.
I can't believe you.
This is your mother speaking.
Hello, Ma.
I just want you to know that we're all here.
Me, Anita, Gerry, the roommate, and we're not leaving until you march in here.
I can't, okay? Could you put Mark on the phone? He's crestfallen, you know? -Mrs.
Olson, it's okay.
-It's not okay.
Now he's making excuses for you.
I don't know how many nice boys you think are lining up for you.
You should be grateful.
Okay, goodbye.
Hello? I'm sorry I ruined this, and I'm sorry you had to spend the evening with my mother.
You know what? She's right.
Really? Then why don't you date her? She's never even had a job.
How the hell are you mad at me? Because you used my birthday to get in good with a bunch of people who drive me crazy.
Should I have invited Don? You never stand him up.
What's the point of doing anything nice for you? Jesus.
You even sound like my mother.
I'm already into this place for $40.
If you don't mind, I'm going to enjoy my dinner, and you enjoy your work.
The fact that you would stay there You know what? Forget it.
No.
What? You want to do this right now? Do what? Fine.
it's been nice knowing you.
Happy birthday.
So, that's it? Yup.
Good night.
Hello? It'll be fine.
Couples fight.
Ask Gerry.
What's wrong? Elevator out? I think I just broke up with Mark.
Really? I think so.
So, go home.
Nope.
I'm ready to work.
You win.
Again.
You could've just told me it was your birthday.
Right, and there'd be no repercussions.
So, now this is my fault? Well, it's not my fault you don't have a family, or friends, or anywhere else to go.
Go.
Go.
Run to him like in the movies.
You don't have to be here.
I do have to be here because of some stupid idea from Danny who you had to hire because you stole his other stupid idea because you were drunk.
Don't get personal because you didn't do your work.
And by the way, I know it kills you, but guess what? There is no Danny's idea.
Everything that comes in here belongs to the agency.
You mean you.
As long as you still work here.
Is that a threat? Because I've already taken somebody up on one of those tonight.
Relax.
You know what? Here's a blank piece of paper.
Why don't you turn that into Glo-Coat? Are you out of your mind? You gave me 20 ideas and I picked out one of them that was a kernel that became that commercial.
So, you remember.
I do.
It was something about a cowboy.
Congratulations.
No, it was something about a kid locked in a closet because his mother was making him wait for the floor to dry, which is basically the whole commercial.
It's a kernel.
Which you changed just enough so that it was yours.
I changed it into a commercial.
What, are we going to shoot him in the dark in the closet? That's the way it works.
There are no credits on commercials.
But you got the CLIO! It's your job! I give you money, you give me ideas.
And you never say thank you.
That's what the money is for! You're young.
You will get your recognition.
And honestly, it is absolutely ridiculous to be two years into your career and counting your ideas.
Everything to you is an opportunity.
And you should be thanking me every morning when you wake up, along with Jesus, for giving you another day! Come on.
I'm sorry about your boyfriend, okay? May 25th.
Ideas for Samsonite.
Toughness means that Peggy, get in here.
-No.
-Come on.
You have to come in here right now.
What do you want? You have to hear this.
Sit down.
Come on.
Sit.
So, this is tape number 4 of Sterling's Gold by Roger Sterling.
So, where was I? Bert Cooper hated me and I thought it was because he thought I 'd be an ally of my father; but it turned out it was something to do with my joie de vivre, my romantic prowess.
See tape 3.
Including some time with the queen of perversions, his secretary Ida Blankenship.
You know what? Don't use her name.
But it was all about him hating my very youth, all because the poor guy had been out down in the height of his sexual prime by an unnecessary orchiectomy.
Lyle Evans, M.
D.
I think he had him killed.
Anyway, sometime in the summer of '48 No, 1932.
NO, 1939.
Why are you laughing? It's like reading someone's diary.
Come on.
Ida was a hellcat? Cooper lost his balls? Roger's writing a book? -I should go.
-Stay and visit.
I've got nothing to say.
Sure you do.
No, it's personal.
We have personal conversations.
No, we don't, and I think you like it that way.
I know I do.
Suit yourself.
We're supposed to be staring at each other over candlelight, and he invites my mother? He doesn't know me.
it's not my fault.
I guess I'm back to square one.
Single.
Well, as Danny would say, "There's no use crying over fish in the sea.
" Mouse! Over there! What are you doing? Get the suitcase.
Why? I'm gonna seal it up in my nice Samsonite and throw it off the roof.
Don't.
Come on.
Every idea you have is some version of that.
Let's do it.
Where'd you go, Mickey? I think it's a rat.
It's a mouse.
I grew up on a farm.
You know what? There's a way out of this room we don't know about.
Are you okay? I think that's yours.
It's probably Mark.
I don't want to answer it.
It's still your birthday.
Let me get you dinner.
What's the most exciting thing about a suitcase? Going somewhere.
The Acropolis.
I'd like to go to Greece.
I hear all the good cooks stayed there.
I'd like to just go on a plane.
I've never been.
Is that right? I've heard about it, obviously.
I've seen it in the movies.
It's an incredible idea, flying.
I remember on the way to Korea they told us how many thousand feet in the air we were.
There was some other kid there, more of a yokel than me, even.
And he screamed, "Man wasn't meant to fly!" Cooper has no testicles? I don't want water.
My Uncle Max said he had a suitcase that was always packed.
He said, "A man has to be ready to go at any moment.
" Jesus.
Maybe it's a metaphor.
There's something to that idea.
I don't know.
I can't tell the difference anymore between something that's good and something that's awful.
Well, they're very close.
But the best idea always wins and you know it when you see it.
Keep banging your head against the wall, then it happens.
And then it's done.
Yes, ma'am.
Not like everything else in my life.
I mean, I know what I'm supposed to want, but it just never feels right.
Or as important as anything in that office.
-I didn't know you were in Korea.
-Very briefly.
-Did you shoot anybody? -Nope.
I saw some people get killed.
That's memorable.
My father died right in front of me.
Heart attack.
I was 12.
Sorry to hear that.
It was pretty violent.
The TV was on.
That's why I hate sports.
Nobody was around Saturday afternoon.
My mother was shopping.
I saw my father die too.
He was kicked by a horse.
You're kidding.
What about your mother? I never knew her.
Why is there a dog in the Parthenon? That is a roach.
Let's go someplace darker.
I hate dating.
I'm terrible at it.
You'll find someone.
You know you're cute as hell.
Men don't exactly stop and stare in the streets.
-Do you want that? -That's not what you were supposed to say.
What do you care what I think? Everybody thinks I slept with you to get the job.
They joke about it, like it's so funny because the possibility was so remote.
It's not because you aren't attractive.
I have to keep rules about work.
I have to.
You're an attractive girl, Peggy.
Not as attractive as some of your other secretaries, I guess.
You don't want to start giving me morality lessons, do you? People do things, right? My mother thinks you were responsible because you were the only person who visited me in the hospital.
-Jesus.
Really? -She hates you.
Do you know who it was? Of course I do.
Do you ever think about it? I try not to.
But then it comes up out of nowhere.
Playgrounds.
Here's Cassius Clay starting to put up a fight.
-.
Get up! Get up! Come on! Get up! Get up! -Come on, get up! -Get up.
Get up! Get up! to the top of the head.
Now, here comes Jersey Joe Walcott, and he says it's all over! It's a fix.
The fix is in.
-What happened? -it's over.
-Already? Who won? -Clay.
Don't believe that for a second.
No one goes down like that.
That's what the man just said.
Some fight.
I lost 100 bucks in two minutes.
Let's go back, pack up and go home.
Damn elevator's like a rocket.
I think I'm gonna be sick.
Are you okay? Do you want any water? What? I have toothpaste and a toothbrush in my desk.
Peggy! Peggy? -Peggy? -I'll be right back.
Peggy? Duck? What are you doing? -Leaving Draper a little present.
-Duck, that's disgusting! Would you let me concentrate? This is Roger's office.
Now, come one.
Pull up your pants.
I'm not going anywhere without you.
Baby.
Baby, I need you so bad.
You wouldn't answer your phone, and your roommate said you were still at work.
Why didn't you answer the phone, Peewee? What's going on? Just go lay down.
You don't belong here.
So, Peggy, I see you're not alone.
I guess when screwing me couldn't get you anything, you had to go back to Draper.
-Duck, let's go.
-No.
That's right.
We were in love.
Turns out she's just another whore.
Hey! Jesus! Would you stop! Stop it! You're both drunk! You know, I killed 17 men at Okinawa.
Uncle.
What the hell is wrong with you? You still think you're better than me? Come on, Peggy.
Let's go.
I got rid of him.
Are you okay? Yeah.
Are you? I I never thought I'm so sorry.
I You know what? I don't know why I was with him.
It was a confusing time.
Stop.
You don't have to explain.
Can you get me a drink? How long are you gonna go on like this? I have to make a phone call and I know it's going to be bad, okay? Do you want to be alone? Just make me a drink.
Sorry if I embarrassed you.
Hello.
It's me.
She's gone.
I know.
She wanted you to know.
I'm sorry I didn't call.
I was Did she want to talk to me? You know, she wasn't really there.
I'm coming out.
I'll make the arrangements.
No need.
She left her body to science.
She said she wanted to go to UCLA Medical School tuition-free.
Of course she did.
I'm coming out.
I'll take care of the house.
I'd like to stay here if that's okay with you, take some time off from school.
Of course.
That's fine.
She's in a better place.
That's what they say.
It's late and it's been a long day.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Goodbye.
Stephanie.
What happened? Somebody very important to me died.
Who? The only person in the world who really knew me.
That's not true.
You should go home.
You can come in late.
I'll be fine.
I'm so sorry.
Good night.
Drop and give me 20! You asshole! Get to work.
it's 10:30, maggot.
Did you spend the night here? Yeah.
See the tight? No.
Ninety seconds of boxing and three hours of analysis.
And we still don't know who won.
Clay won.
Read the paper.
Come in.
You look fresh.
Did you go home? I spruced up.
Come over here.
Look at this.
I think you have to know the photo.
It's on the front page of every paper.
It's historic.
How do we know it's the Tourister that got knocked out? Because the slogan will say so.
How do you put it on TV? Are they animated? Why are you shitting on this? I'm tired.
It's good.
it's very good.
Give it to Joey.
No, Stan.
Then go home, shower, and come back and give me 10 tag lines.
Okay.
Open or closed? Open.
-Two for the Campbells, -Where are these exactly? It's a movie theater, no bad seats.
The Cosgroves, and Joey, Stan, Danny, $10 each.
How come we have to pay when everyone knows damn well they were free? You're such a Jew.
Your friends in Hollywood know you talk that way? And let me tell you, you're the Jew, trying to make 30 bucks on something you got for free.
Twenty-five on Clay by a knockout.
Liston is favored for a reason.
Cassius Clay is scared.
Of what, pray tell? He had an elevated heart rate before the last fight.
Who says that means you're scared? It happens to me all the time, it runs in my family.
Liston has the weight and he's never been knocked out.
Sonny's old.
He's experienced.
Don, I've got your ticket.
You want to put something down? Stan's got a barber who makes book.
Yeah, who do you like? I was just saying I think Clay'd make one hell of an adman.
You're right.
Give me 100 on Liston.
Joining us for a little pre-fight steak and cocktails at The Palm? Absolutely.
Samsonite team, in my office.
Listen, if it comes up with Jennifer, I did pay for the seats.
Can you make a dinner reservation before the bout for Mr.
Sterling and me anywhere but The Palm? I don't know why everyone cares so much about it.
If I wanted to see two Negroes fight, I'd throw a dollar bill out my window.
I thought we were doing this at 9:00.
it's 11:15.
I'm late, but you're not.
Good work so far.
Where do you want me? Behind the desk is fine.
You're in a white studio, like in some limbo.
There's two no-name football players holding an American Tourister and a Skyway going against Mr.
Joe Namath and his defender, a sexy girl holding a Samsonite, and maybe a referee.
So, we hear, "Hut, hut, hike!" Namath fades back.
"Oh, no, it's a blitz!" Punch in on Namath, he says something like "The secret to victory on the road is Samsonite.
"I carry it because it's tough, "and no matter what comes at me, I know I'm protected.
" As they fall, the competitors will bust open, clothing flying out.
Touchdown, Samsonite! -I got it, honey.
-You sure do, Joe.
âSamsonite It's tough Endorsements are lazy, and I don't like Joe Namath.
He hasn't even played in a professional game yet.
He's very handsome.
And women don't buy suitcases.
Dr.
Faye says they do.
Could you leave us, please? Peggy, I'm glad that this is an environment where you feel free to fail.
You wanted to go with Danny's idea.
Because it works.
"Only Samsonite is tough.
" It's the execution that's the problem.
Okay, should it be funny? Actually funny? Maybe.
Funny like what I just saw? No.
Hello.
You remembered my birthday.
Did you open my present? I am.
Hold on.
My goodness.
I'm finally doing what I should've done years ago.
Phillips-Olson something probably, but I'll need you.
I want to form an agency that specializes in women's products with you as my creative director.
I don't know what to say.
But you're smiling, right? I have some very It's sort of a little under the table, but very high-level talks with the people at Tampax.
Peggy, it's Tampax, 50% market share.
I mean they're really up there.
Plus that queer at Belle Jolie has been barking up my tree.
Plus I have my European connections.
It sounds exciting.
The train's leaving the station, honey.
Get on board.
Where am I calling you? I'm in my office at home.
So, you already told Grey? I'm not wasting my talents over there anymore.
Believe me, it was mutual.
Duck, did you lose your job? Peggy, this is good.
I'm not gonna lie.
I was a little inspired by what Draper did.
Now I just need some accounts.
It's tough because, well It's tough to get a credit line.
So, what do you have so far? I know it's not a diamond necklace, but I did spend some money on those cards.
And I appreciate the gesture.
It's just I don't know whether to take this seriously because I suspect you've been drinking.
Well, you're wrong.
I heard about the CLIOs.
I have to see you tonight.
I have plans.
What, with that Mark? He's another one.
Duck, you are a valuable account man.
You have a bright future.
You just need to go to one of those headhunters and I need to see you, babe.
Don't do that.
Peg, I'm falling apart.
Don't you know you're the last thing that made me feel good about myself? Pull your hands out of your panties.
I can't talk right now.
I want to see you tonight.
You been farting in here? I have to go.
We're going to lunch.
I don't know if you could tell, but he hated it.
I was hating it too while we were doing it, but not before.
I'm not gonna lie.
So, we're back to the drawing board.
Still gotta eat.
Come on, it's your birthday.
We'll let you talk through lunch.
You got a call while you were in the toilet to the direct line.
Stephanie from California, no last name.
She says it's urgent.
Would you like me to place the call? No, I've got it.
Bad news.
Our night is ruined.
I took care of that.
The kids are going to The Palm.
We are going anywhere else.
Well, the brotherhood of Alcoholics Anonymous, Freddy and Cal Rutledge from Pond's will be joining us for dinner and the fight, which means we'll have to drink before dinner, if we want to drink at all.
And then there's all the talk about drinking, where they start with the funny stories and they end up crying.
Again.
Fifteen months I've been waiting for this fight.
$300.
Liston has to lose by unconsciousness.
-Get rid of 'em.
-I can't.
I should work on Samsonite.
That's in two weeks.
I'm gonna be in Florida.
Now, this is your job too.
Let's go.
I'm sorry.
You can do that without me.
Samsonite you can't.
Are you serious? We can solve this problem with a flask.
No, I wouldn't be good company anyway.
That's never bothered me before.
I don't know what it is, but I look at the side of your neck and I wish I had one of those James Bond pens so I could jam a dart in it.
James Bond likes to travel.
He goes all over the world.
He goes underwater.
He met a girl underwater.
I think this is a good place to stop.
See you tomorrow.
Great.
I don't like sitting at my desk and looking into a garbage dump.
Although I am paid less, I am still not a janitor.
Thank you, gentlemen.
-Doing something special for your birthday? -Mark is taking me to dinner.
The Forum of the Twelve Caesars.
Yes.
How old are you? Twenty-six, today.
You're doing all right, aren't you? Well, hello.
Did I hear it's your birthday? It is.
How are you feeling? Well, of course my days are spent sleeping and visiting the ladies' room, although it's an incredible feeling having this baby kick me.
Is it any different than living with Pete? You're witty.
I always assumed that, but it turns out it's true.
Are you going to watch the tight? Yes.
I've been watching boxing since I was a little girl.
My father loves blood sport.
Mr.
Draper's looking for you.
I'm sorry.
I have to go.
Happy birthday.
You know, 26 is still very young.
Have fun.
I want a rare steak, and I want to see those two men pound each other.
Cynthia's at the restaurant.
We should go.
What about Jennifer? Don't go in there.
Don't do it.
-She's dead.
-Let's beat it before it's us.
-I was just on my way out.
-Did you get California? Do you want me to try before I depart? There's a time difference, you know.
I do, but it goes the other way.
Good night, Mr.
Draper.
Get in here.
Why don't you talk to Joan and get rid of her? No, Joan knew exactly what I needed and made sure that I got it.
So, where are we on Samsonite? We'll have something to show you in the morning.
But the suspense is killing me.
Well, I kind of was on my way out.
Let me just see where we are.
I guess I've got a minute.
Okay.
We thought that Samsonite is this very rare element, this mythical substance, the hardest on earth, and we see an adventurer leaping through a cave.
Is this a substance much like bullshit? I thought we could drop one off the Eiffel Tower, with a countdown, like the moon shot and show how it doesn't break.
-But it would, wouldn't it? -Probably.
The government has prohibited us from doing things like that, Peggy.
They feel that it is not in the public interest.
We have a thing with Samson, because he's strong and his hair.
I gave you more responsibility and you didn't do anything? That you like.
We did work.
A lot.
I don't care if you work 10 seconds if you bring me something I like.
We're going to do this right now.
I Know you have plans.
You were going to call me from a bar with an idea? You think elves do this? You're just gonna change it anyway.
Excuse me? This is Mark Kerney.
I am so sorry.
I got drawn into his web.
It's gonna be a while.
A while like soon, or a while like I should cancel? Fifteen minutes? It shouldn't take too long.
He's going to the boxing match.
He's going to Maine? You can watch it on closed-circuit TV in the movie theaters.
We got tickets.
How come we didn't go? Because we're having a romantic dinner for my birthday.
Well, did you tell him that? Look, I'm the only one who can help him with this, and the sooner I get off the phone, the sooner I can come.
Just hurry, will you? She's gonna be a few minutes late.
A surprise on top of a surprise.
She works too hard- "The Oysters of Hercules, which you with sword shall carve.
" I saw a tray pass by.
They look like hockey pucks.
$1.
65.
You should let Gerry get this.
Mom, don't cut the kid off at the knees.
Now, what if an elephant either sits on or steps on a suitcase? How about a slow-moving airplane runs it over? Do you like Cassius Clay? He's very handsome.
I don't think so.
You're not supposed to.
I remember my mother talking about Nat King Cole in a way that made my father throw out all his records.
He's got a big mouth.
"I'm the greatest.
" Not if you have to say it.
Muhammad Ali.
Do you like the airplane? Liston just goes about his business, works methodically.
Clay will dance and talk, throw a few until he's wiped out.
A bag under an airplane looks like there's been an accident.
Three classes of suitcase.
Featherweight, middleweight, heavyweight.
For whatever class you're in.
But how do you do that on TV? What's the story? You don't like it? No, I love it.
That's great.
That's what we should do.
Let it ring.
I'll say you're not here.
Hello? Hello, Roger.
No, he's not here.
I answer other people's phones all the time.
I'm going to count to three, then I'm gonna start saying a lot of words you don't like, sweetheart.
This should be good.
I'm begging you, get down here right away.
You think I'd rather be working? Yeah, I do.
Did you know Freddy Rumsen collects Indian arrowheads? Where are you? There's a bar next to Keenes.
I've been sneaking off to fortify myself.
Tell 'em you're sick.
Go home.
I am sick.
I think I overdid it.
And they're self so righteous.
I never pissed my pants.
This guy Rutledge killed a man with a motorboat.
You know what gets you over something like that? Drinking.
Still got your ticket.
It's an attractive offer.
Look out your window.
Can you see me? Good night, sweetheart.
Go ahead.
I'll wait.
Hello.
Fifteen minutes? It's almost an hour.
I'm so sorry.
I'm gonna leave any minute.
Did you at least have something? You have to get down here.
You have to get down here right away.
I can't just leave, okay? But you have to, okay? You know what? Just go to my apartment and wait for me.
We can eat there another time.
No, I don't want to do that.
I'll make it worth your while.
Damn it, Peggy.
I've got your whole family here for a surprise dinner, okay? And the only way you can make it worse is by not coming at all.
Mark.
I'm so sorry.
I'm coming right now.
Thank you.
Well, so much for the surprise.
Okay, I'm going to leave if that's all right with you.
I'm not so sure about it.
I mean every time we get into this, we abandon the toughness idea.
Maybe there's something to the elephant.
Do you want one? I'm sorry.
Do you have someplace to be? Maybe tap your foot so I get the message.
I was supposed to be at dinner an hour ago.
it's my birthday.
And I'm pretty sure I ruined everything.
Why the hell didn't you tell me? I don't know.
Because I thought this would take a second.
So, now I'm supposed to feel like crap? "I'm so sick that I ruined her birthday.
" Do you know when my birthday is? I was your secretary.
Well, enjoy your evening! By the way, you are 20-something years old.
it's time to get over birthdays.
Go ahead.
I'll do it myself.
Yes, I'm that important.
So, the fact that you're calling means you haven't left yet.
I'm not gonna be able to make it at all.
Are you kidding me? I'm sorry, but no one asked you to do this.
You said you never had a surprise.
I can't believe you.
This is your mother speaking.
Hello, Ma.
I just want you to know that we're all here.
Me, Anita, Gerry, the roommate, and we're not leaving until you march in here.
I can't, okay? Could you put Mark on the phone? He's crestfallen, you know? -Mrs.
Olson, it's okay.
-It's not okay.
Now he's making excuses for you.
I don't know how many nice boys you think are lining up for you.
You should be grateful.
Okay, goodbye.
Hello? I'm sorry I ruined this, and I'm sorry you had to spend the evening with my mother.
You know what? She's right.
Really? Then why don't you date her? She's never even had a job.
How the hell are you mad at me? Because you used my birthday to get in good with a bunch of people who drive me crazy.
Should I have invited Don? You never stand him up.
What's the point of doing anything nice for you? Jesus.
You even sound like my mother.
I'm already into this place for $40.
If you don't mind, I'm going to enjoy my dinner, and you enjoy your work.
The fact that you would stay there You know what? Forget it.
No.
What? You want to do this right now? Do what? Fine.
it's been nice knowing you.
Happy birthday.
So, that's it? Yup.
Good night.
Hello? It'll be fine.
Couples fight.
Ask Gerry.
What's wrong? Elevator out? I think I just broke up with Mark.
Really? I think so.
So, go home.
Nope.
I'm ready to work.
You win.
Again.
You could've just told me it was your birthday.
Right, and there'd be no repercussions.
So, now this is my fault? Well, it's not my fault you don't have a family, or friends, or anywhere else to go.
Go.
Go.
Run to him like in the movies.
You don't have to be here.
I do have to be here because of some stupid idea from Danny who you had to hire because you stole his other stupid idea because you were drunk.
Don't get personal because you didn't do your work.
And by the way, I know it kills you, but guess what? There is no Danny's idea.
Everything that comes in here belongs to the agency.
You mean you.
As long as you still work here.
Is that a threat? Because I've already taken somebody up on one of those tonight.
Relax.
You know what? Here's a blank piece of paper.
Why don't you turn that into Glo-Coat? Are you out of your mind? You gave me 20 ideas and I picked out one of them that was a kernel that became that commercial.
So, you remember.
I do.
It was something about a cowboy.
Congratulations.
No, it was something about a kid locked in a closet because his mother was making him wait for the floor to dry, which is basically the whole commercial.
It's a kernel.
Which you changed just enough so that it was yours.
I changed it into a commercial.
What, are we going to shoot him in the dark in the closet? That's the way it works.
There are no credits on commercials.
But you got the CLIO! It's your job! I give you money, you give me ideas.
And you never say thank you.
That's what the money is for! You're young.
You will get your recognition.
And honestly, it is absolutely ridiculous to be two years into your career and counting your ideas.
Everything to you is an opportunity.
And you should be thanking me every morning when you wake up, along with Jesus, for giving you another day! Come on.
I'm sorry about your boyfriend, okay? May 25th.
Ideas for Samsonite.
Toughness means that Peggy, get in here.
-No.
-Come on.
You have to come in here right now.
What do you want? You have to hear this.
Sit down.
Come on.
Sit.
So, this is tape number 4 of Sterling's Gold by Roger Sterling.
So, where was I? Bert Cooper hated me and I thought it was because he thought I 'd be an ally of my father; but it turned out it was something to do with my joie de vivre, my romantic prowess.
See tape 3.
Including some time with the queen of perversions, his secretary Ida Blankenship.
You know what? Don't use her name.
But it was all about him hating my very youth, all because the poor guy had been out down in the height of his sexual prime by an unnecessary orchiectomy.
Lyle Evans, M.
D.
I think he had him killed.
Anyway, sometime in the summer of '48 No, 1932.
NO, 1939.
Why are you laughing? It's like reading someone's diary.
Come on.
Ida was a hellcat? Cooper lost his balls? Roger's writing a book? -I should go.
-Stay and visit.
I've got nothing to say.
Sure you do.
No, it's personal.
We have personal conversations.
No, we don't, and I think you like it that way.
I know I do.
Suit yourself.
We're supposed to be staring at each other over candlelight, and he invites my mother? He doesn't know me.
it's not my fault.
I guess I'm back to square one.
Single.
Well, as Danny would say, "There's no use crying over fish in the sea.
" Mouse! Over there! What are you doing? Get the suitcase.
Why? I'm gonna seal it up in my nice Samsonite and throw it off the roof.
Don't.
Come on.
Every idea you have is some version of that.
Let's do it.
Where'd you go, Mickey? I think it's a rat.
It's a mouse.
I grew up on a farm.
You know what? There's a way out of this room we don't know about.
Are you okay? I think that's yours.
It's probably Mark.
I don't want to answer it.
It's still your birthday.
Let me get you dinner.
What's the most exciting thing about a suitcase? Going somewhere.
The Acropolis.
I'd like to go to Greece.
I hear all the good cooks stayed there.
I'd like to just go on a plane.
I've never been.
Is that right? I've heard about it, obviously.
I've seen it in the movies.
It's an incredible idea, flying.
I remember on the way to Korea they told us how many thousand feet in the air we were.
There was some other kid there, more of a yokel than me, even.
And he screamed, "Man wasn't meant to fly!" Cooper has no testicles? I don't want water.
My Uncle Max said he had a suitcase that was always packed.
He said, "A man has to be ready to go at any moment.
" Jesus.
Maybe it's a metaphor.
There's something to that idea.
I don't know.
I can't tell the difference anymore between something that's good and something that's awful.
Well, they're very close.
But the best idea always wins and you know it when you see it.
Keep banging your head against the wall, then it happens.
And then it's done.
Yes, ma'am.
Not like everything else in my life.
I mean, I know what I'm supposed to want, but it just never feels right.
Or as important as anything in that office.
-I didn't know you were in Korea.
-Very briefly.
-Did you shoot anybody? -Nope.
I saw some people get killed.
That's memorable.
My father died right in front of me.
Heart attack.
I was 12.
Sorry to hear that.
It was pretty violent.
The TV was on.
That's why I hate sports.
Nobody was around Saturday afternoon.
My mother was shopping.
I saw my father die too.
He was kicked by a horse.
You're kidding.
What about your mother? I never knew her.
Why is there a dog in the Parthenon? That is a roach.
Let's go someplace darker.
I hate dating.
I'm terrible at it.
You'll find someone.
You know you're cute as hell.
Men don't exactly stop and stare in the streets.
-Do you want that? -That's not what you were supposed to say.
What do you care what I think? Everybody thinks I slept with you to get the job.
They joke about it, like it's so funny because the possibility was so remote.
It's not because you aren't attractive.
I have to keep rules about work.
I have to.
You're an attractive girl, Peggy.
Not as attractive as some of your other secretaries, I guess.
You don't want to start giving me morality lessons, do you? People do things, right? My mother thinks you were responsible because you were the only person who visited me in the hospital.
-Jesus.
Really? -She hates you.
Do you know who it was? Of course I do.
Do you ever think about it? I try not to.
But then it comes up out of nowhere.
Playgrounds.
Here's Cassius Clay starting to put up a fight.
-.
Get up! Get up! Come on! Get up! Get up! -Come on, get up! -Get up.
Get up! Get up! to the top of the head.
Now, here comes Jersey Joe Walcott, and he says it's all over! It's a fix.
The fix is in.
-What happened? -it's over.
-Already? Who won? -Clay.
Don't believe that for a second.
No one goes down like that.
That's what the man just said.
Some fight.
I lost 100 bucks in two minutes.
Let's go back, pack up and go home.
Damn elevator's like a rocket.
I think I'm gonna be sick.
Are you okay? Do you want any water? What? I have toothpaste and a toothbrush in my desk.
Peggy! Peggy? -Peggy? -I'll be right back.
Peggy? Duck? What are you doing? -Leaving Draper a little present.
-Duck, that's disgusting! Would you let me concentrate? This is Roger's office.
Now, come one.
Pull up your pants.
I'm not going anywhere without you.
Baby.
Baby, I need you so bad.
You wouldn't answer your phone, and your roommate said you were still at work.
Why didn't you answer the phone, Peewee? What's going on? Just go lay down.
You don't belong here.
So, Peggy, I see you're not alone.
I guess when screwing me couldn't get you anything, you had to go back to Draper.
-Duck, let's go.
-No.
That's right.
We were in love.
Turns out she's just another whore.
Hey! Jesus! Would you stop! Stop it! You're both drunk! You know, I killed 17 men at Okinawa.
Uncle.
What the hell is wrong with you? You still think you're better than me? Come on, Peggy.
Let's go.
I got rid of him.
Are you okay? Yeah.
Are you? I I never thought I'm so sorry.
I You know what? I don't know why I was with him.
It was a confusing time.
Stop.
You don't have to explain.
Can you get me a drink? How long are you gonna go on like this? I have to make a phone call and I know it's going to be bad, okay? Do you want to be alone? Just make me a drink.
Sorry if I embarrassed you.
Hello.
It's me.
She's gone.
I know.
She wanted you to know.
I'm sorry I didn't call.
I was Did she want to talk to me? You know, she wasn't really there.
I'm coming out.
I'll make the arrangements.
No need.
She left her body to science.
She said she wanted to go to UCLA Medical School tuition-free.
Of course she did.
I'm coming out.
I'll take care of the house.
I'd like to stay here if that's okay with you, take some time off from school.
Of course.
That's fine.
She's in a better place.
That's what they say.
It's late and it's been a long day.
Okay.
Goodbye.
Goodbye.
Stephanie.
What happened? Somebody very important to me died.
Who? The only person in the world who really knew me.
That's not true.
You should go home.
You can come in late.
I'll be fine.
I'm so sorry.
Good night.
Drop and give me 20! You asshole! Get to work.
it's 10:30, maggot.
Did you spend the night here? Yeah.
See the tight? No.
Ninety seconds of boxing and three hours of analysis.
And we still don't know who won.
Clay won.
Read the paper.
Come in.
You look fresh.
Did you go home? I spruced up.
Come over here.
Look at this.
I think you have to know the photo.
It's on the front page of every paper.
It's historic.
How do we know it's the Tourister that got knocked out? Because the slogan will say so.
How do you put it on TV? Are they animated? Why are you shitting on this? I'm tired.
It's good.
it's very good.
Give it to Joey.
No, Stan.
Then go home, shower, and come back and give me 10 tag lines.
Okay.
Open or closed? Open.